Year in Review: 2022
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I think most people, when we wear a toboggan inside, it's kind of like more up. It's more of a hat. And yours is as if you're going to jump in snow. This is my game wear. This is what you wear at the game. This hat, yeah. Yeah. So your toboggan is pulled down. I can't even hear you guys. I know. Kevin McAllister, 85.

I saw the Instagram story about the toboggan before I got the chance to catch up on this podcast. And now that I'm hearing you guys talk about it, I can't keep it together as a Canadian. I have never heard of a, heard a toke T O Q E. I think it's toke, a toke called toboggan in my life, watching people say toboggan. So naturally in conversation was a trip and had me laughing so hard. Thank you for the completely random moment. My made my day. Yeah. A few things have polarized, uh,

the listeners as much as this discussion. I don't think anything has. I think it's pretty heated. Let's go versus hello. Yeah. That was the last thing that people have strong opinions about. Maybe that was just fun. Mm-hmm. This one's kind of fun. I know, but I'm saying, is this one getting more serious? This one got pretty serious. As serious as a discussion about what to call a hat can be. Yeah. I've never heard of toke. I hadn't either.

I only have heard of Tope through Dusty Slay's wife, Hannah, who's Canadian. I heard her call it that once. But who's calling it that in real life? You didn't say anything? No, I let it slide. Yeah.

I used context clues. I figured out what she was talking about. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, generally speaking, it seemed like people in the South call it toboggan. Yeah. People in Canada call it toque, and the rest of the U.S. calls it a beanie. Yeah. But people have sent me articles saying there's different variations. Everything's technically a beanie. Yeah. And then a toboggan's a type of beanie. Oh. And there's a lot of different things. Knit cap, sock cap, stocking cap. Yeah. Stocking cap. But the poll we did, beanie dominated because...

I think most of them. That's what everybody does. Everybody calls it a beanie. I like that there's a lot of toboggans. Yeah. That does make me feel good. Yeah. But people in Canada were pretty fired up about us calling it a toboggan. So if you're listening, it's 437 votes for toboggan, 1,844 votes for beanie, and then toque came in last at 216 votes. Kind of probably read those wrong. For people listening at home, if you're in suspense, you just did the middle first.

and then you went first place in the middle and then just who cares 216 at the bottom i mean like if i mean it's the abc that's what the big arm got coming in third place we have tope 216 toboggan 437 beanie 1840 yeah that would have been the way to do it for sure you read it maybe the least exciting way you can read it honestly uh

I don't know if you could pick a worse way. Because even if you – yeah, there couldn't be. That's the only way that's not good is to go 437, 1840 for a second, and 216. There's –

I mean, all right. Well, all right. And I didn't even think anything about it when you said it last week because that's what I call it. Toboggan. I call it a beanie, but I hear toboggan enough that I don't even think about it. Who started the poll? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, people were so fired up about it that I did the poll and I really got people fired up. Yeah. I love the different regional terms. They're really funny to me. I had a buddy in college from Wisconsin.

And one day he was like, I got to fill up my water bottle with a bubbler real quick. Yeah. I was like, what are you talking about? That's crazy. Yeah. The water fountain. Bubbler. It was a bubbler. I've never heard of it. And where is he from? Milwaukee. Yeah. In Wisconsin. Yeah. Is that Milwaukee, is that? Yeah.

The bubbler. A bubbler. Yeah. A very small little region in that part of the country that calls it a bubbler. Most of the country calls it a drinking fountain. I've always called it a water fountain. I call it a water fountain. Yeah. Water fountain. Because that's what it is, you know? It's because it gives you, well, you drink out of it, though, too. Not always. If you're filling up a water bottle out of it. You're going to drink eventually. Yeah.

You should be eventually a drinking family. That's fair. Eventually a drinking family. Watering your plants. Well, I mean, if you're a nut job, you take your plants up there and...

you're staying in line with a pot. Like that's what you would be. You'd be in, there's a line of kids just waiting for the turns and you're like four back and you got just a plot, just a pot. And then you just set it up there and just turn it on. And it doesn't, you gotta, you gotta bend it over a little bit. Cause the stream's not high enough. You get hit with some of those streams. I missed the little turn. One was always good, but man, you get, you bend down and you get hit right in there. Oh yeah. Forehead. Yeah. They don't have it calibrated. Right. Yeah.

And if you don't know, and then some of them, like no water comes out and everybody's mouth's just on it. It's coming out just a little bit. Just a little bit. And then you just, and kids will just, your mouth just goes on it. It is very funny to be like it will, when it just hits you right in the face. Because you're not even prepared for it. I just remember being in line at school and it was just the prime chance to kick someone while they're doing it. What? Yeah.

I got kicked a lot. I was going to say, there's no way you were doing it. You were getting kicked while you were drinking? No, think about it. It was just me. Yeah. That's your most vulnerable position. You never saw that? That never happened? Just boys like to kick each other? I think we grew up in different times. I don't think I was around. I had water fountains. We're just like... I had segregated water fountains. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

If you're here for what I do, for the aspect of it being clean or this not being heavy and not being whatever, divisive or political, that kind of stuff, that's the idea that I want to make with stuff. You're someone that is just... What? I mean, you're a cow on the... Look at the butt in front of you and just...

Walk, walk, walk, walk until it's your turn to be slaughtered. And then, you know, I'm a cow that sticks his head up and goes, hey, I don't think we're going. If we all turned and moved and went the other way, we would go out. Hello, folks. Welcome to the Nateland podcast. I'm Nate Bargetzi, Aaron Weber. We solved that problem. Welcome. Yeah.

No, Brian's here. Brian's here. He's, you know. It's not bad. That was awesome. Not bad. Bates, Brian Bates here. Yeah, I have to apologize because people, I got in a lot of trouble by everybody that I was mean to.

I didn't mean to go on a big cutting. I mean, I did, I guess. It's all coming out of, I was trying to be funny, making fun of you. And it got, and people took it too real. Please do an episode on the Pepsi jet.

Finally, you were robbed at the Grammys. You're easily one of the best in the game and deserve that win. Well, thank you very much for that. I'd say the Kid Nurse 1970. I agree Nate is one of the best in the game, but to win a Grammy, you have to be the best in the game, and the Grammys determine he is not. Oh, wow. Good night. So much for that kindness you're showing, Nate, right? Yeah.

For all the... I'm going to... I'd like that clip pulled aside for all the, Nate, you're too mean to Brian. And, you know. Christina Barga. I couldn't help but notice that when we have another penguin situation on our hands, the way Nate and Brad Currams say bingles sounds like it's spelled bingles. B-I-N-G-L-E-S.

I'd be curious to see what Aaron Lane has to say about this. I would bet he pronounces it. How do you pronounce it? Bengals. Bengals. That's how you say Cincinnati Bengals? Yeah. Since I actually sided with him in the penguin pronunciation, I find it funny to hear it pronounced Bengals as if it rhymes with Pringles. I know this whole comment sounds like a Dr. Seuss book, so my apologies in advance for making Nate read this.

Yeah, Cincinnati Bengals. Yeah, I've always said Bengals. I said Bengals. What did you say? Bengals. So you say it like the band, the Bengals. I say it the way everybody I've ever met in my entire life says it. You know what I mean? Until now? Until now, yeah. I mean, does it bother you that you're...

Most people don't say it that way? No. Do you notice that? Are you aware of it? No, I think when they all say it, we say it. We're not around much people that can get into Notre Dame. I'll talk about on ESPN, they go, tonight's matchup, the Cincinnati Bengals. They don't say anything. What do you think? I just follow them around and go, I think I'm saying it wrong. I think they're saying it wrong.

Okay. You protected of the South or you're not protected of the South? Who are you defending here? That's a good point. I've never noticed it. I never noticed either. The more we talk about it, the more I'm thinking Bengals, like Bengals. Bengals. Cincinnati Bengals. Now I'm saying, it's wrong in my head and I'm like, I can't get it out. Cincinnati, and he's from Connecticut. That's ESPN territory. That is true. We invented how to say it.

Bengals. How do you say it? I say Bengals, like the bangs on your hair. Bengals. But like the band, the Bengals. That's a funny reference. I would like to say... But I mean, they spell it differently. Both ways, Bengals, the way we say it is B-I, the way you say it is B-A. No one's saying Bengals. Bengals. She nailed it, though. This is the exact argument we had about penguins. Yeah.

So we obviously Bates, I think everybody knows this is Monday, the something 20th, 21st, 21st. Yeah. First day of spring, all that stuff. And Bates should be, their baby should be coming. They're at the hospital. They're at the hospital now. Yeah. So it could be happening right now. We don't know if we get a live update. We'll let you know. But so yeah, next time you guys will see Bates, he will be a father. Wow. Wow. That's crazy.

Kelly Swallows, if we don't get a split screen of the rock bear chest with his baby and baby Bates on bear chest breakfast, I will not feel my time dedicated to this podcast was even worth it. Look at that. There it is. There it is. That's so, I mean, good night. The difference. Which one is which again? Yeah. Yeah. Bates needs to get, I think it's the first time I've seen Bates with his shirt off. I don't care for it. He needs to get that tattoo the rock has. Maybe just pull that blanket up a little higher.

If you're taking a picture, I don't know. You're like, just maybe, you know, no one's in there. No one's in the room. And they go, maybe just pull, you know. Just a half an inch. Just a little bit. Pull it up. Yeah. I love how there's not a blanket in the left one. Yeah. Not a blanket at all. I mean, the rock shows less nipple than Bates does, and we'd rather see the rocks. So look at his Bates. Very cute. Yeah. That's cool. Yeah.

Welcome to the Nate Land Podcast, as always, Aaron Weber, and look who's back. Hello, folks. Brian Baby Bates. Welcome back to the show. Thank you. Baby's good. She's great. She's under the table right now, and he's just rocking over their foot, like he just...

She's doing real good, guys. She's in the car, but it's a little chilly day, so I think we can leave the windows up. Hello, folks, and hey, Bear. Welcome to the Nate Land Podcast. Sitting here with Dusty Slay, Aaron Weber.

And a new guest with breakfast, Little Breakfast. Hello, folks. Hello, folks. Hello. We got a little visitor. It was roughly a year ago. It was exactly a year ago today that I revealed it in the recording, November 1st when we recorded it. And it came out a few days later. But yeah. Yeah. One year ago, I told you guys I was having, my wife was having a baby. Yeah.

There she is. Here we are. I still don't believe it. Look at you. Good size. She's getting big. She's doing great. She's doing great. We wanted Eleanor to say hi to everybody. The headphones are just for fun. She doesn't need them. Yeah, just people to go. She was born with those headphones on. All right. All right, we're passing her off to Abigail. Eleanor, she would have been put her out back in the car. And...

Bye, honey. What if it was a whole, he has no wife, no baby. We're just going through it. Got to keep the charade going. Got to keep the charade going. Nate paid to have a baby here. That's my baby. Yeah. You know who didn't hurt himself? It's Chase, my merch, the guy that sells merch. Which, by the way, we were saying, this is like a, hold on. My voice, I think it's still the same.

so uh we did so chase so people think a lot of people think chase is my son like so if you see if you go see chase if you go see the the the guy that sells merch he's 22 i think he's never heard of the south beach diet i don't like it's like he's like so young and but a lot of people they think because he i mean you look at him he kind of looks like me uh

which is very hilarious to think that of all the personal stuff I talk about on stage, I just wouldn't talk about my 23-year-old son. I talk about my dad, my parents. I talk about my brother, sister, my wife, my daughter, and I just never mention...

By the way, I have a 23-year-old son that we just kind of keep on the back burner. Wouldn't it be great if he was just telling people that as he sold the merch? Yeah, well, people think it's him. He just fueled the rumor? He just always laughs at the fact that people say that to him. But if you go buy merch, I'm not telling you, look, I'm not forcing anybody to do anything.

If you're buying merch, definitely bring up like, oh, you're Nate's son, right? Like he never talks about. Just say that to him constantly. Even if you don't buy merch, maybe just go by him, say something. We're going to see how long it takes till he will come back to me

Don't say you heard it on the podcast. Don't make it a big deal. Just be like, no, I heard it. There's rumors online. Maybe there's a Reddit. Everybody just said that you're his son that he doesn't talk about. And then just kind of move on about your day. And I want to see when he will eventually go and figure it out. It's becoming more aggressive. It's becoming a problem, honestly. Maybe people take a picture with him. Hashtag Chase Bargatze. Chase Bargatze? Yeah, get it done. Yeah.

Yeah. Chase, Nate's boy. Just yell it. You can yell it as you walk by. Nate's boy. Yeah. Yeah. You know. I saw a comment on Reddit that said, can somebody post a picture of Nate's 23-year-old son? Yeah. And somebody who didn't listen to the podcast was like, nah, dude, we should respect his privacy. They're like, don't do this. Like, you don't need to do this to Nate's kid. Yeah, guys, don't. You know? It's crossing the line, guys. You guys, you crossed the line. My wife doesn't even know about him. So, too far. Yeah.

We're going to talk. I don't know what kind of out of it is. Yeah. Can I ask y'all something that made me think of it? That electric e-bikes. Have you seen this debate going on online? We're a little late to the game, but there's a big debate going on in the United States. Do you think that there are more wheels or doors?

In the whole country. Including bikes? Including bikes, including everything. Motorcycles, yeah. Everything in general. More wheels or doors? I think more doors. You think there are more doors? 100%. There's more doors. Think about one person's house. There's three times the doors versus cars they have. Okay. Every person. I think you have a lot more wheels in this house than you're thinking of. What wheels are you... I mean, like...

uh well you got the wheels you got your cars you got uh office chairs four wheels so we have eight wheels okay i got that electric bike 10 wheels there you go laura's got a bike 12 wheels yeah lawnmower or something out there it's got wheels think about all the wheels on uh harper's toys you got lego wheels yeah you got all these chairs here that's uh are we counting gears too

Do gears count as wheels? Well, this also depends on how you define wheels and doors. I already don't... Where's this debate happening? It's happening all over Twitter. It's all over social media. Oh, yeah. It was the talk of the town a few weeks ago. I'm just late to the game here. I just want to hear what y'all thought. It would be... I thought it was obviously wheels. Oh, no, no. I think if you're having to...

like pull a lot of strings to make all these wheels beat the doors. I don't know. The doors come out of the gate. I mean, just think about like, dude, there's doors. There's two doors here in just this room, the bathroom door and the way to get out. So it's like, you have so many doors and,

There's 12 wheels. There's 15 wheels in these chairs the three of us are sitting on. Yeah, but that's what I mean. Not at the end of this podcast. Yeah, so far. So that's just saying, but you're having to literally go chase down every wheel to beat doors. Yeah, well, I don't think in this scenario you have to collect all of them in the country. It's just a...

I know, but I don't think you can even count all the – there's a Michael Jordan car that has four wheels on it. There you go. There you go. So that's what I mean. So the argument kind of gets to – it seems to me like it's a wheel person trying to beat a door person, and the door people have them beat clearly, and the wheel person's like, okay, but I didn't – you forgot. I didn't mention that your chair that rolls back and forth, that's four. You're like, okay, dude, all right.

All right. I guess if you add that, oh, there's a lawnmower. You're like, all right. So you're not talking about obviously what people think of wheels. When you say just wheels, no one's even going to think lawnmower. Don't forget lawnmower. Yeah. Well, that's why it's a fun hypothetical. Look at all the hotels in Vegas. Oh, yeah. Did you forget this guy's Hot Wheel collection? Did you forget that? A Lego makes millions of toy wheels a year. Think about a hotel, though. There's multiple doors at every hotel. And these Vegas hotels have...

30,000 doors. I don't know how many rooms they got. But each one of those doors has a roller chair behind it. Yeah. That is true. There's an office chair in every room. This wheel thing isn't reaching to me. You got to think that every car, wheels win cars. So there you go. There's always going to be, at most, it's a tie. Yeah. Yeah.

So it's neutral. No, because a lot of cars only have two doors, but they all have at least four. And a motorcycle doesn't have a door. There you go. I just think wheels wins in a landslide. No, I think so. I would, I just look at it as like, that's fine. Wheels might win, but the time it's going to take you to figure out how many dumb wheels you're going to make up. That's going to beat doors. Like I'm already, I got so much money in the door world that I don't even, you're going to be tired. You're barely make it to the debate center. Yeah.

because you'll be just worn out of just being like, well, there's a will, will, you know, like Jared Leto, just in character, will, will, will, there's one will.

Yeah. You know, that's what I think. All right. I mean. Well, it's good. Good things. Stuff's getting solved on Twitter. Sorry. All right. Elizabeth, if you're thinking of doors versus wills. Here we go. Then you have to consider all doors like kitchen cabinets, fridge doors, appliance doors, dollhouse doors, et cetera. Fine. You're still fine with it. Yeah, that's all part of it.

That's all part of it. We'll count all those as doors. I still think wheels wins. I think you're going to spend a lot of time arguing about wheels more than doors. So I think I would spend a lot of time going like, come on, man, that's a wheel. It moves in a wheel. And you're like, okay. Because when I said the other doors, I go, what about these cabinets? Are these doors? And you go, all right, that's fine. Just make those doors. Yeah, count those. Yeah, you said it like...

The same way I'm saying about wheels. You're like, yeah, yeah, I'll count that. We have a, you know. Count them all. All right. There's no way to find, is there a real answer to it? I think the fact that Lego makes a hundred million wheels a year. Yeah. Has to make them a favorite.

Is there a way to get to the... No, that's kind of the fun of it is that it's just a thought experiment. There's no real answer. What if you guys actually put this effort towards jobs and creating stuff? You think that would be... What if you did that? You know what I mean? There's no answer to it. So what's the point of even talking about it? It'd be a lot less fun. It's fun to... How much do y'all not have to do that you like to... Did you come up with this? No, he's talking like I'm in a group that came up. Yeah. Like that you like to debate this...

And then you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. You debate something that can't be solved. What was the other one that you did that you said earlier? Joey Chestnut versus Usain Bolt. Yeah, yeah. That one's like- That's a fun one. That's a fun one, but it doesn't lead into just mindlessly. I just look into the first one that you're like, well, a nut is technically a wheel. You can wheel it. And then you're like, all right, dude, I can't.

You're just throwing stuff out of my, out of everything. You're like, my aunt's got a fake knee. There's a wheel in there that, and I'm like, oh, good. So she's in the house, and you're like, yeah, she lives downstairs. Welcome back, everybody. It also does this. Oh, man. Yeah. Know that. This is the Grammy part. Here's my, I don't know if you can see it close.

It's the, they give you a nominee medal. And so I got this sent to me a couple weeks ago. Nice. So I will have always have this. That's awesome, man. Grammy nominee. And what do they tell you? I mean, that's a line that's, you're going to be introduced that way forever. For the rest of my life. Yeah. I'm a Grammy nominee. Grammy nominated comedian. You look like Kramer with his motorcycle helmet. Yeah.

I'll be honest, wearing this helmet when I did this. Well, let's go ahead and bring my wife in, Laura Bargetzi. All right. First time on the long time. No, I want to say the opposite. First time caller, long time listener. And no, no. I always looked at it the other way. I always want to call into a place and go first time listener, long time caller. The opposite. Yeah.

You just called in. Uh, so, uh, yeah, this is the helmet I wore, uh, balded at blizzards in Charleston, West Virginia. So I'm sorry. I don't want to get ahead of you. This is all your idea. So this was my idea. Uh, so wearing, wearing the helmet was, uh,

So they were going to do that. I might take it off because I can't. No, please leave it off. Leave it off? I think it's great. Yeah. So this was my idea. I would say take it off. Well, it's already off. Okay. So, and I feel protected. I think this is, you're supposed to take this off, but I think it looks cool. I don't be bothered.

I'm a Grammy nominee now, dude. I can't even go out in public, so I'll wear this. I'll be honest with you. Wearing this, I think if I'm not a comedian, I could wear this on the red carpet and they would just be like, oh yeah, that's what someone's doing. He's making a statement. I mean, there's like... Yeah, I would fit in. If I wore this helmet...

On the red carpet, I don't know if they would have talked about me. There's so many other people. They would have never mentioned it. They would have been like, oh, that one guy wore a helmet. They're like, I mean, how many helmets do people wear every year to the Grammys? 30? 40? I forgot to mention, when we got home from the hospital, I had to go pick up some medicine. We'd been in the hospital for four days. I was like, why do I smell gas? The squirrels had bitten through my gas line again. Again. Again.

Wow. Never got to the bottom of this. Apparently not. What'd you do to get rid of them? We did everything people suggested. Put out fake snakes. We put out mothballs. We spray. I'm back to spraying now. This rodent repellent. Yeah. I'm going to have to build a garage because it's going to cost me more. Yeah. The car repairs. I mean, just...

I've never, I don't know. I just never, it's so funny to never have this and you are getting a full-blown attack. This is such a big problem. It's such a big problem. Did you order fake snakes on Amazon or something? I did. Okay. And you laid those out all around the car? We've got like two, one by our car and one by our dad's car. And her dad's like moving it now. Yeah. He thinks...

He thinks the squirrels are onto it, so he's moving it. But he doesn't tell anybody, so I'll just be going to the mailbox and I'll just jump out of my skin because her dad's moved it. Well, then you're going to have a real snake one day and be like, come on, and then grab it. I know. Yeah. We're attracting snakes because they're like, oh, there's snakes. I'll tell you where everybody's cool with your snake, the old bait house. They're invited. Yeah, they don't care. They love it.

We just had a squirrel attack our car wires as well. My dad is a mechanic and he said to use original scent Irish spring bars of soap. Put it in a sock and fasten it up underneath the car and it works. You try that? I haven't yet, but I will. Do Irish spring bar soap

put it in it's always like so much extra stuff yeah it's like you want it to be like all right just get soap and you're like all right just throw it in the car or something it's like no no no you got to get a sock that you're fine getting rid of and then you got to fasten it up underneath the car special scent irish mcnell original scent do you have to then move it like you have to before you go out there get it out and then always go back and forth i don't

I don't know. Like when everybody goes to your car, you got to... Do you mind popping that hood? And then you just untie your sock and soap. What does it mean it works? It keeps the squirrels away? Or they get poisoned when they eat it? No, it keeps them away. Yeah. Because apparently squirrels are attacking...

Her and Bates' car. On a regular basis. No one else has heard any about this ever. Me and Carrie Ann.

Carrie Ann and Bates have got a wild squirrel thing going on. Lauren Watson, to get rid of the squirrels, there's more squirrel stuff. Put a flashing radio clock out there and let it play 24-7. We got rid of squirrels and garden critters this way. You can also sprinkle human hair and they smell it and stay away.

Keeps.com. Is that right? Brian can't afford it. He's like, I don't know. I can't just throw hair out there. I'd rather have the squirrels. Why is it a radio clock? I don't know. Hair works. To put human hair just... Wow. Is Lauren here? Yeah, Lauren. Y'all know Lauren, dude? All right.

Y'all know all of these. You're like, y'all didn't give them, no one of them got tickets? You're like, yeah, I don't know. I mean, the flashing red clock, I think, just, I don't know, is, you know, if you want to know. Do you have to plug it in? If you're letting the squirrels know you're white trash, you're like, well, how are they going to know if I don't have a car out there? You're like, well, put a flashing radio clock and let it play the whole time. That kind of lets everybody know what's up at your house.

Don't bother breaking in. There ain't much in here. All our expenses are out in the yard with our flashing radio clock that keeps the squirrels away. You have a little squirrel update? I have a lot of squirrel updates. Since I last talked about it, they've hit my car twice. Twice. They might listen. I...

Light came on in my car. This is just like two weeks ago. And then I took it in the shop and they're like, yep, squirrels bit through your fuel line.

and we're gonna you know they fix it or whatever it was in the shop for a week i bring it home like a week later that light comes back on i was like they didn't fix it so i'm taking it back over there and have them fix it i take it back over there they're like no no they did it again it's happened just since that so twice in the last three weeks i've had my car in the shop for these rodents and

Biting through the line. If I didn't know your wife, I'd think you lived in the complete wilderness. Yeah, I know. That's what everybody thinks. The squirrels, the pole cats. We have so many critters. We have a groundhog, a snake of the day. Oh, so then I go... Oh, there's the... You got it. That's the mechanics...

Took a picture of it, showed the line. It tore through that thing, man. What are the squirrels playing? I don't know. Do you think they can smell weakness? I don't even know what the squirrel was trying to get. That seems malicious. It does seem like... There's something in the lines that they like. What have you been up to out there? Then my father-in-law is very stressed about it. He has nothing else going on. He's like, I already put out a fake snake.

fake owl but now the squirrels just think they're friends so they're like that didn't work so my father-in-law I'm gonna get another fake snake but he doesn't know how to order stuff online or something so he went to Phillips Toy Mart and

and just bought a toy snake and put it out in our driveway. That's what that other one was. So that's what we're using now to deter. I thought it was real. Squirrels. Okay. Well, I guess it works. It's pretty good. Well, maybe it's a little overdramatic and that's a good thing. Maybe so. Are y'all going to move it around every now and again? I mean, right now I have two snakes under my car and a bar of soap because someone suggested on the podcast, the Irish spring original soap. And they said, put it in a sock and,

It's fascinating. I don't know how to do that. So I just put a bar of soap under my car. Yeah. But it's raining today. So when I get home. The driveway's clean. Clean. Yeah. You might think about getting a real snake. Yeah. You just found it. You said you had one. I saw one the other day in our yard. Yeah. There you go. Did you talk to him and ask him? If he was available for parties. I mean, what would. That's wild, man. Yeah.

So does anybody, like your neighbors, no one of you ever asked any of these people? Yeah, I mean, I put it on the neighborhood Facebook thing, and tons of people commented like it's a real problem. Now, most people have garages, and I guess we're going to have to do that. But that's not a quick fix. Well, it's good that they're not just going after you. No, it's a big thing in our neighborhood. That would make me feel better. Jared Robertson, just watched The Greatest Average American. I got to know who put syrup in the waffle maker.

And I'll tell you who, Breakfast Baits over there. They probably could have guessed that. Does it not make sense? Yeah. Once you're done, you're like, yeah, yeah. Yeah. This is all day long. It was, yeah.

He actually made me sound better than it really was. Yeah. It was worse than, yeah, I was trying to be like, you know, show a little class. Yeah. There was a countdown clock, so I could see exactly when things were about to go bad. Yeah. I mean, just the line. You know, like if all of us were in line behind Brian, we would all be like, you almost want to see it. And you'd expect it. You're like, well, let's all go watch. But when people don't know, it's a lot. It's a lot for people.

And then he just ruins everybody's breakfast for the rest of the day. Got down there early. He's got his little MTSU shirt on and shorts. He's in clothes that you're like, did he sleep in them? Probably. I don't know. You want to hear a crazy story? It happened this weekend. So we have a buddy of ours, Steve Byrne, stand-up comedian who lives here in Nashville. He was on the road in Fort Wayne, Indiana with Joe Gatto. They went to an antique store.

And he texted me a picture of this from the antique store. It's a baseball glove with the name Aaron Weber on it, written with a Sharpie. And he sends it to me as a joke. And he says, did you leave behind a baseball glove in Fort Wayne, Indiana? And I said, no. So I took that picture. I sent it to my parents.

Just to let them know, hey, isn't this funny? My mom goes, that's my handwriting. She used to write our names on all the gloves with a Sharpie like that. So that's my mom wrote my name on the Sharpie. And my dad goes, that's 100% your glove. No way. So we don't know what happened. But my childhood baseball glove ended up in an antique store in Fort Wayne, Indiana, which we've never lived there. Yeah. And Steve Byrne happened to be in that store and saw it. Did he buy it?

When I told him about this, he had already left and he tried to go back the next day and they were closed. But we got to find a way to go get it. I'm in Indiana in June. I'll get it for you. Are you in Fort Wayne? Yeah, close. Oh, dude. Hopefully nobody buys it. You got to call them and say, I want that. I bet there's a folk that lives there that'll go get it for you. There might be. Yeah. Yeah, someone's there.

What is the name of this place? I need to find that out, too. Your glove is an antique. That's a good way to find all the information. I mean, it may not be. It's a pretty hot commodity. You literally know everything. You found a glove from when you were a kid in a different city. Well, what's the name? So people maybe go grab it. You know, I don't know. I don't know. I didn't really look it up. Did they have yard sales and stuff? Here's the best guess my mom could come up with, is that the last time they moved-

They had a box somewhere that just accidentally got left behind. And then this got donated to Goodwill or something like that. And it just made its way. We've never been to Fort Wayne. We've never lived there. Somehow made its way up there to an antique store. Do you have any memories with this glove? Absolutely. I remember this glove specifically. Oh, wow. Now that I was like, oh, I did have a mag.

MAG on it. I just thought it was the craziest coincidence ever. You're wearing it and you're asking, like, hey, why do we have to wear cotton on these summer days? I don't know. What is it, Seinfeld? Oh, the baseball uniforms? Yeah. Is it too hot? Yeah. It's too hot. Polyester? No, polyester is too hot. Yeah. And they switch to cotton? Yeah. Oh, yeah. Polyester. Sorry. Yeah.

That's crazy. Yeah, well, if you get the name of it, maybe in a couple weeks you can let the audience know. Yeah, I'll grab the four. An antique store in Fort Wayne. Yeah, if it's an antique store, they're probably like, wow, is this some ancient glove? Yeah. I mean, why else would it... Yeah, you got to be careful how much you want it because then they'll jack the price up. No, they might. I would pay. You know, I wouldn't have even paid

Like if somebody showed it to me, I don't know. Just this whole story was so crazy. Do you want the glove back or do you want it to? I'd like it to round off the story. Yeah. Like the fact that Steve was there and found it, we had just exchanged numbers. It was like a crazy coincidence that he was there and saw this. It'd be fun to have it on the table and talk about it. Yeah. I would have loved to. It would be. If you get it, we can put it up. We'll put it up here. Yeah, we got to. Awesome.

I'll make it happen. I will find it. And we'll end the story in a good way. Yeah. And I believe you with Planet Fitness and that other thing. Before we get into it, can I ask the glove update? Yeah. Steve Byrne got the glove. He brought it to me. I have it. I have my childhood baseball glove back. Where is it? It's at my house right now. I mean...

How do you, how would you not bring it? Yeah. Cause I came, I was in Denver this morning and I came straight here, so I didn't get a chance to grab it. But how, then why would we even, why would we bring it up? I don't think Brian knew that I didn't, didn't have it. Well, I just, so many people have asked. It is. Yeah. It's good to follow up. We were going to update in the next episode. Two weeks from now, I'll have it. Oh God. I don't even care. I don't even, I will, I'm not even impressed with this story. Oh, it's a great story. Now,

Now, a lot of people have commented that it was great until they realized you and your entire family went to school in Indiana, very close to where this was. Yeah, but I didn't bring my baseball glove from when I was eight to college. Yeah. So that's not where it was from. Maybe your brother at Purdue or –

He took an eight year old's baseball glove to college. It's a, it's definitely a crazy. Yeah. It's a crazy story. I don't say you don't bring the glove. I'm not, I just don't. I mean, I don't like a plant just to, if you think about a show that we're creating, we're creating a show. I came straight from the airport to go, you know, uh, it's like, uh, I got a tattoo with Nate laying on it. Wow, dude, can we see it? I'd rather not. I'd rather not show you. Uh,

Oh, okay. All right. But I'm glad we said that because I'm still getting a lot of messages people offering to go grab it for me. Okay. And I need everyone to know it's been grabbed. Yes. It's back in my hands. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah.

Kind of. Maybe go grab it from Aaron's house. If people are listening, I think that would be great. If people could go actually, so maybe we could see it for a month later. Oh, that's right. Last day of the podcast. Oh, there's that glove. Remember that story? Steve Byrne went through all that trouble and he just, you know. Oh, can I, while we're on the topic of this, just to put an end to this story. I know we're past the point of caring.

But I've got, this is the baseball glove. Oh, wow. It's been brought back to me. I appreciate everybody. I'm still getting messages asking to go pick it up for me. We have the glove. People say it doesn't even exist. It is a real glove. It's in Nate's hand right now. It's a mag. It's a real not good glove. Is it good? It's all right. It's definitely, it's lived in. Yeah. Put a lot of. 1997, I graduated high school.

Yeah, yeah. It's a good glove. Yeah. Got it back. So I've got it back. Thank you, Steve Byrne, for doing that. Thank you, everybody, for reaching out and asking about it. Thanks for bringing it. I mean. Guys, thanks everybody. I did win the lottery. Oh, wow. You have your little thing to show? Oh, I didn't think I should. I didn't know I should bring it. But I'll just show them to see it.

I did sell peanut butter for 10 years, so I know a little bit about it. Wait, you've talked about this. Yeah. That's true. So, you know, what do you think about it? You sold peanut butter? Door to door? No, man, I didn't go door to door. When in your life have you ever seen the peanut butter guy come in door to door?

it's from a different time man i don't know if that used to happen here comes the drift man how old do you think i am would you go man you had the peanut butter guy it was you and the milkman is it like ups fedex now yeah y'all would see each other yeah hey yeah y'all go eat and you're like that's cool man y'all are friends in real life though you're like yeah yeah like that's cool man yeah with him but the i was jif the peanut

Peter Pan guy was not friends with him. Not friends with him. Well, the jelly people, you're almost like jelly because maybe peanut butter seems like it came first over jelly. Kind of kissing up to them. Yes. Oh, you think jelly's... Yeah, you know that's where the... Even though you are... You're like peanut butter would be like we're the staple. We're true to what we are. And in jelly, you're like...

I don't love jelly. I think jelly's flashy and all this other stuff, but they're moving. Yeah. It's the future. Yeah. So it's either be friends with them or don't get out of the game. Yeah. Get out of the game. You're not going to change the game. You're not going to change the game. You met a guy that said- Jelly's the future. Yeah. Well, jelly was, it changed everything. It did. It changed the game. I would imagine peanut butter was first and it was like, you know, it's good. It's like- Is that not right? Oh, no. I mean-

God, they make you really study when you sell peanut butter, huh? Yeah. I mean, you know, people ask these questions. You don't just don't go selling it. Yeah. Yeah. You know what's happening. You show up at somebody's doorstep. You better know your stuff. Yeah. I think nowadays there was no doorstep. Yeah. It wasn't like,

Girl Scout cookies or something, man. Encyclopedias. Come on. I had big accounts, Darren. Big accounts. You tie the horse up to the thing and walk inside. I had like Kroger. You know, like I had. Ooh. Yeah. All right. My bad, man. Yeah, man. I'm sorry. You're kind of belittling what I did.

You got Todd Kroger into buying peanut butter. They were an anti-peanut butter. Go ahead. No, no. Now you sound like my dad. Okay. It was like, you know, I always had a hard time explaining the job. It was a good job. It was like, you know, paid a lot and it was a competitive job to get. But my dad was like, well, you know, you're.

you're not, you're not really in sales. I'm like, yeah, yeah, I am. You know, he's like, well, I've been going to the grocery store for 60 years and they've always had Jif peanut butter. Yeah. What do they need you for? I'm like,

It's not about whether they carry it or not. It's about how much they sell to their consumer. And there's all kinds of things, dials and switches I can move to help them sell more. And he'd still be like, yeah, yeah, you're not in sales. Like the display and such. Display is a big display. Shelf placement. Shelf placement is another. Shelf placement is another. You would be eye level? You'd like to be eye level.

Yeah. You like to have a block. You like to have a real nice block. I don't know why that's funny, Nate. I'm telling you, this is important stuff here. He said you like to be. It's just such a serious. I felt like I was interviewing to be a Peter. I go, so we want to be eye level? You like to be.

Don't expect to be Ilo. You're not just going to walk in there and be Ilo. You're not just going to walk in and say you're Ilo. I mean, yeah, you're a new kid on the block. Don't think you're going to – they're going to try to throw you at the bottom. You show up the first day. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, and I saw it in a lot of different places. I mean, Jif, we were brand leader usually. We were Ilo. If you walk into a store today and you see Jif on the bottom shelf, somebody did something to make somebody angry. Interesting. Yeah. Now, Pringles –

that was a whole we were you know you sold pringles yeah i sold pringles so you got a peanut butter no no we i was saying they were the same company i sold pringles jiff duncan hines is pringles considered a potato chip it is you're selling very easy you're selling things that are not easy i mean these i'm i think i'm on your dad's team i know it's you're selling stuff it's like i don't know i swear i went through this the things that i have to have i went through this but i was like that's

That's like being, like you're selling cocaine. No, it's, it goes pretty good. People really like it. You go, oh, is it hard to do? No, it's, but there's, I had competitors. You go up against Skippy and see how well you do. Jif is the main, Jif is the main one. It is the main, but it got there through guys like me. You got the name. You got the name. You got the name.

Food's on the ground. Food's on the ground. Yeah. Shoe leather and knuckles. And now we know who to thank. Yeah. Okay. I started Jiffy Spell with a G. Let's go, folks. Well, welcome, everybody. Thanks for listening to this. This is the 100th episode, right? Yeah. Yeah. Pretty crazy. Did you think we'd make it? To 100? Yeah. I don't know.

I don't think I thought of it. You didn't think we'd make it. Yeah. Brian and I, you knew you'd get here. When I look at both of y'all, I think, golly, how did y'all slip by me for a hundred episodes?

No, I don't know if I... No, I mean, I thought... I don't know. I don't know what I thought when we started it. But it's... I mean, every time I go to shows, people come up. They listen to it. They love it. It is fun to do. So it's great. And I love that... I mean, I love how much people are listening to it. And so it's fun. 100 episodes. Yeah. So with 100 episodes...

We are going to change up something a little bit. And, yeah, Bates, you go. You move up to my role, Bates. I'm in your role. Let's switch. People voted, and they wanted more Brian. So we're going to change it up, and we're adding a fourth co-host. Oh, man. So it'll be four of us.

I know people, you know, we've mentioned stuff like that. I think it's fun. I'm excited about it.

It's just another comic, another someone that's funny that I think fits very well with us. I believe we haven't blurred out right now. And if I mean, if you're at home, you're trying to guess, you can pause it. If you want to pause it and try to take a shot. I mean, you think they could. I mean, you don't know who's going to guess. He's appeared on the show before. Aaron, do you want to take a guess? Would you have any idea? Yeah.

I got a pretty good clue. He's blurred out, Aaron. So how could you see him? Can I guess? You took that like it was a real beating. I thought we were going to go play long. You made it sound like I really just yelled at you. Oh, yeah. It was a cower over here in the corner. You go, I'm sorry. My bad, dude. Can I guess? Yeah.

I'm going to say it's the guy that used to work with your sister, who's the Bigfoot expert. He is. It is. We brought him in. He was great. He was amazing. Welcome to Nate Land, Dusty Slick. All right. All right. We're having a good time. Having a good time. Wow, that buildup really had me. You know what I mean? Yeah. I was more nervous about that buildup than going on shows. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, look, I think we're big fans, obviously, and I think you fit well with us.

You grew up poorer than all of us, which is nice. Yeah, bring in a real poor aspect to this. A lot of money floating around this table. Yeah. Well, we didn't have money. Aaron comes from a pretty wealthy family. That's right. He comes from Royals. Yes. And then, but so me and Bates wanted to feel, we wanted to be able to punch down. And we were like, well, who could we get? Oh, Dusty was in a trailer park. That's right. I brought food stamps with me this time around just to pass out, just so you knew what they looked like. That's how we're paying them.

And then with Galaxy, so we're the Milky Way. We're named after that candy bar. And then... That's what they'll have at that wedding. Yeah. Milky Ways. Yeah. Why would we be named after a candy bar? Doesn't make a lot of sense to me. It's better than Baby Ruth. Yeah, but I wish it should get its own fame. Kit Kat. Yeah. When did the Milky Way get... It got named after the... When did we call it the Milky Way?

Why do they call it the Milky Way? Because it looks like Milky? Butterfinger Galaxy. That'd be a lot of fun. Because you know what's on the outside, but you don't really know what's on the inside. The Milky Way candy bar was created in 1923. Yeah. The name and taste derived from a then popular malted milk drink of the day, not after the astronomical galaxy. So when did we start calling it the Milky Way? Yeah. So we did name the galaxy after the candy bar. Well, yeah, we might have.

The term was actually used 2,500 years ago. A little bit earlier. We call the galaxy the Milky Way a little longer than the candy bar. But I think saying that you named the candy bar after a milkshake seems a little inaccurate. They shouldn't let them do it just because you're like, man, you're kind of just ruining what we're doing with space. Yeah. It really takes the kind of steam out of it. It's also a candy bar. That's how little serious we take it.

is we're naming it as, and it's not even one of our real great ones. Oh, golly, dude. You think a Milky Way is that good? Oh, my God, dude. You hit a button there. Start this podcast over, man. You think a Milky Way is- Milky Way is, man, the number one, in my opinion. Oh, no way, dude. I enjoy a Milky Way, but number one? Number one. Oh.

I don't know if I've even had one saying all this. Oh, dude. Over Snickers, dude? It's like a weak Snickers. Snickers with no peanuts. It's like a weak Snickers. I'm not trying to eat a meal at the candy bar, dude. I want Milky Way. It's just nice and smooth. Caramel chocolate. It's the right texture. It's the right size. It's everything you need. What was first, Snickers or Milky Way?

I don't think I've ever had a Milky Way. But people get rid of them. Yeah, like the little fun size. Yeah, it's your favorite one. It's my favorite one, and I don't even think it's close. More than a Reese's? Snickers came after the Milky Way. The Milky Way paved the way, dude. The Milky Way walked so Snickers could run. It's the most unoriginal thing that you named it after the... Oh, do you want to eat my moon Skittles? Why don't you come up with your own name that's not...

You know, Snickers is a great, like that's a name that's made up. I'm just shocked at the reaction that Aaron has had. Hey, would you like a Jupiter? It tastes like banana. I've never seen Aaron so fired up in my whole life. I've never seen someone even think about Milky Ways like that. I love a Milky Way. I mean, I need to try one. You're going to play Augusta. I'm going to say that. You'll finally play probably the nicest golf course in America, right? Yeah. Yeah.

And you're going to meet Jerry Seinfeld and get to know him and have his number and become friends with him. Oh, man. How exciting would that be? I did talk to Seinfeld. I have talked to him. Big time. Who predicted this? It's one of Bates' big predictions. It was very crazy. I talked to Seinfeld, FaceTimed.

And it was surreal. It was not super long. It was quick. I have his phone number. I was very excited about that. Can I have it? Yeah, I'll give it to you. I'll post it. And yeah, it was crazy. I mean, just seeing him, it's unreal. You're just looking at him and you're like, it's you, dude. It's you. That's amazing. Yeah, he was very complimentary, very nice.

And something – and the thing I did say, I was like, well, I won't bore you what – I said, I was like, I won't overwhelm you with, like, what you've meant to my career. I did that, but I don't wear short sleeves on stage because of you. Like, that's all. And he, like, laughed at that. It's like, that's how much this dude – like, I'm not wearing short sleeves on stage because you said it looked weird in a commentary on your DVD. Not even –

Not even like that's what he lives by. It's just like an all... And he might even wear shorts. It might be such a side comment that he doesn't even remember it. And you're like, and I don't wear it. It changed your life, though. It changed everything. Yeah.

We have these bells, too. We bought bells. You walk around the bell, and it, like, rings a little bit in a bear bell. And so it's, like, enough to, like, so the bear would hear you. Because the bear doesn't want to meet you. But it's, like, if you walk up on it, that's when you can get in trouble. The bell thing, though, we wore it the first day, and no one else had a bell. And I felt so stupid as we're walking by these people, like, ding, ding, ding. And then I looked it up, and people were like, yeah, those don't.

You know, because it's like they're not loud enough. Like the bears hearing is like our hearing, I think. And so it's like, you know, I don't know. It's like maybe it would work and it's not. You could do it, but it's if you I mean, we're walking by children without bells. And so I was like, all right, we're yelling. Hey, bear, so much. And you just go, hey, bear, just a group of family of four walks by. You're like.

And you're like, oh. Thought you were a bear. Paul D. I think hay bear should be the response to hello, folks. I like that. Yeah, that's fun. You know the last podcast that started with hay bear? Yeah. I love a nice hay bear. Yeah. Hay bear. A lady that gave me candy wrote a note and it said hay bear. Yeah. To me. I like hay bear. Yeah. Yeah. Could be good. Is hello, folks. I mean, yeah, it's like hay bear.

So, you know, cause I do hello folks and I do let's go folks when we start the podcast. Yeah. Maybe let's go bears. Yeah. Jay Cutler. Yeah. A hay bear just got to pop in whenever. Yeah. Hay bear feels like it's one that,

it pops in we were doing it on the trip and they're they're very funny to pop in hey bear yeah like just throwing in a nice hey bear out of nowhere yeah you know and if you're hiking and you do a hey bear and someone gives you a hello folks back yeah then you know what's happening that's yeah you know what's going on yeah hello folks yeah hey bear hey that is a pretty even let's go for like it is funny someone goes hello folks hey bear

And then see. Yeah, yeah. Because then people will be very confused on that. That could be, it could, y'all can, you know, I like it. I like the, you know, I like the less, I like people, you know, I'll talk to Harper and we were talking about hello folks and let's go folks. And we said, what, I was like, what are you? And she said, she thinks she's more let's go folks. But I like that there is a hello folks and let's go. Like there is a, it is like, you know, I met someone, uh,

And Paso and they were, you know, fewer hello folks. And then one's like, I'm a let's go. And it is like, you're like, you kind of get who the person is. Yeah. And that I do like that. I do like Hey Bear. Hey Bear. Hello folks. And Hey Bear. I like Hey Bear now. I got Hey Bear all weekend for people. It's fun. Hey Bear is great. It's, it's like, it is the good room. I think someone said it in the comments. It's the best response. Yeah.

The let's go folks. Like, Hey, if you say hello folks, you go, Hey bear. Cause it's such an opposite that it does. So I, I agree. I guess we can take a vote. The vote was Hey bear. I've been getting some Hey bear too. And I'm thinking I like when, like if a, if a lady says Hey bear to me, I'm like, my wife is going to be upset about this. Like people come up, they go, Hey bear. And I'm like, I don't know if that's okay.

It sounds like you're already in another relationship so much that y'all have dick names for each other. Right, right. She's like, it can't even be like, oh, did y'all just meet? You're like, we've been dating for five to six years. And she calls me Bear. And I go, hey, Bear. They did a survey a few months ago of Americans to see what animals would win in a fight and what animals humans could beat in a fight. And...

If you could pull that up. Yeah. 6% of American men said they could beat a grizzly bear in a fight.

Which is ridiculous. I imagine these are big dudes, though, I would say that. Yeah, but still, come on. Just juke it. What about like a Brock Lesnar type? You don't think Brock Lesnar could take a grizzly bear? I looked up, like, could an MMA fighter, like, choke a bear out or just anything? And they're like, no, it would be over just like that. But people have done it before. Yeah. People have fought off bears. Yeah. Well, they fought off. They didn't win a fight.

I'd say if the bear left. I mean, I saw The Revenant. That's based on a true story. By bear. He had a gun and a knife. Remember the old Tank Abbott? Yeah. MMA guy. I think if he got a couple of punches to the face of the grizzly bear, I think he'd take it. Well, Khabib wrestled bears, right? When he was a kid, Khabib would wrestle bears. Yeah, they're big dudes. Yeah, I'd take this guy over a bear. Yeah.

It's the idea that your brains come into it. Are you serious? Yeah, why not? People have killed bears before. So your smartness comes into play too. So that's used as your advantage. You're talking about pure strength? No, humans are strong. You're talking about just straight up, they walk in and it's like, here we go. And you just got to be smarter than the bear, trip it.

trip as he falls down. You know how hard it is for a bear to get back up? It's not easy. Imagine a bear comes and attacks a guy like Butterbean. Yeah, you got Butterbean pulled up. And then Butterbean starts whacking him. He's like, whoa, whoa, I didn't see that coming. Yeah. He's like, the last guy I attacked just laid down on the ground and played dead. I think a lot of stuff will have to go right. Yeah. Yeah. To say the least. But...

I mean, what about like... I think 6% is a good amount. That's a good amount that said they could do it. Yeah, I believe those 6%. Yeah. I believe those 6%, and you can talk to me that it's only 4%, and there's 2% that's just, well, you're a lunatic. What about like... And then there's the 4% that you're like, all right. Now that, if you could scroll down a little bit further, it'll show like what animals, that's what...

you could beat. I love the fact that 28% feel like they can't take out a rat. Yeah. I might be one of those 28. Yeah. House cat, goose, 61%. Goose are tricky. Yeah, they're mean. They're mean. I got boxed out by some geese on a hike in Bristol, Tennessee. This little narrow passageway, this goose just stood there in the middle and just wouldn't let me pass. And it took like 20 minutes.

They're scary, dude. The thing about a lot of these animals is you can't just go around kicking a goose. Like if you were down there on that trail and that goose was coming at you and you kicked it, stomped that goose into the ground, and then some other hikers came, they'd be like, jeez, dude. So I would think...

that you got to look at the, you look at this list of animals. So that's, it goes, uh, rat, house cat, goose, medium sized dog, medium sized dog is down to 50%. I think they could beat it. Eagle 30, large dog, 23, chimpanzee 17, King Cobra 15. So now you're getting into the low ones. So you got to go, all right, where am I, where am I getting nervous at? Uh,

you know, large dog, you're like, all right, I think I could beat it. I think you got to look at like, what animal am I comfortable charging? So who am I comfortable like,

grabbing and like charging and you got to really be on man to man combat. And so you got the dog, the champion Z, I think is tough because they're just so much, they're strong. Yeah. That if they, uh, and they have fingers and stuff like you. So that's, that's bad news. Yep. Uh, King Cobra obviously is just, I mean, I think you could beat it up. You'd have to get it by the tail and then sling it. But once you did that, it would be over, but it's, I charm it. Okay.

I play music. You would? Yeah, yeah.

You know, my dad told me he knew a guy... That guy attacked by a fox recently. He was cleaning his pool and a fox came up. And he said the guy killed the fox. But the fox was tearing him up. Was biting his legs and just bit the guy up. In the end, he won. Yeah. But he got eat up. Yeah, I think every animal is going to be tough. I mean, even a rat would be hard. It's a matter of like...

You got to think, now this is not a normal fight. This is a fight to the death. So you're thinking you're in a room. You can't leave the room. One of you, maybe not. Is it a fight to the death? They don't specify. To the death, it's going to be tough to kill a grizzly bear with your bare hands. Well, as far as bear attacks, it basically said don't do what you suggested. Don't try to run from the bear. Grizzly bear, that is. Because no one's trying it.

They said they can run as fast as a horse. Wow. It doesn't matter. It's the... It's the juice of the doubt. Shake and bake. Barry Sanders could evade a grizzly bear. Yeah, I bet so. I bet Barry Sanders could tackle a grizzly bear. Well, he's a running back. But you tell me, though, he couldn't tackle it?

You told me Barry Sanders couldn't tackle it. Come on. Come on. It sounded like a guy. It felt like you slurred that. It did. It sounded like an old drunk Dusty. You told me Barry Sanders. You said Barry Sanders can't tackle a book. And you're like, Dusty, are you driving? Did you?

You sound occasion. Right now in the face, you're going to look me in the eyes, face, and say, bitch, son. Bitch, son, can't take a good bit. Bitch, son, can't take a good bit. Is that what you're going to tell me right now? All right, Dusty. All right, buddy. This guy, something's wrong with him. Coley Escher. Coley Escher. Coley Escher.

Dusty did a fantastic job at the Palm Beach Improv this weekend, but I was at the show where audience members kept interrupting with yee-yee. Oh, I forgot all about yee-yee. Yeah. Oh, man. What a wild show. It's been a while since you guys shared any tidbits about how the sausage is made. So could you share some experiences with outbursts from the audience and how you choose to handle them? Dusty, you incorporated it really well, but I felt bad for the flow of your jokes because it kept happening before your punchline.

Well, I mean, I do so many shows that that was a blast to me. I was like, I've not, I mean, like I wanted to do yee yee. I can't even do it well. Yee yee. I'm hoarse. I feel like, but I used to, I mean, that show was so fun. Like somebody yelled out yee yee. I had never really heard yee yee before. And I just, it felt like every punchline I could work a yee yee in there and the audience loved it.

I mean, a couple of times I got interrupted by people yelling it out, but I had a blast. So you did it most of the time.

Well, after the initial and then a couple of people, I mean, there was one time when I was doing a joke and someone interrupted the joke by doing it, but it worked. I even complimented them on it. I was like, that was a well-timed yee-yee. I mean, it was so fun. It was one of the most fun shows I've had in a long time. I mean. So you encouraged more of this to be sure. I mean, I don't want it to happen all the shows, but yeah, that particular show, I was like, let's keep this going. I'm into this. Yeah. Yeah.

What did someone just yelled yee-yee and that's how it got started? Well, I said, you know, I got some jokes about country music and I was like, I'm a big fan of country music. And so people clapped and cheered and then somebody goes, yee-yee. And I guess that's a country thing that people do. I had not heard it. I'm familiar with yee-haw. Yeah. But not a lot of yee-yees. I've never heard yee-yee. And so that's what I talked about, how I didn't really, I wasn't really familiar with yee-yee.

So, and then I just kept bringing it back. And I mean, it was a hit. All right. I mean, Colby Escher enjoyed the show. Yeah. Felt bad for me, but don't feel bad for me. We had a great time. We had a great time. Yeah. We had a great time. Supposedly, I don't know for sure, but someone told me afterwards that I think there could have been a fight that broke out. You know, I got an email this morning from

From someone who said, was it the late show? Yeah. They apologized because they said...

his wife, her hair, I guess, was hanging over the seat, the guy behind him. And the guy put his knee on her hair to pin it against the chair. Yeah. And they got into a, not a fist fight, but they got in a big argument. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I heard. So I sat in the second show. I watched the whole thing. It was awesome to just sit in the crowd and watch. And I had a real out-of-character moment. The guy in front of me,

Every joke you did, he would turn to his side and be like, I would do that. Yeah. Like relating to all your jokes, but in an annoying way. Yeah. And I had a really out of character moment. I leaned forward. I grabbed the dude on the shoulder and I go, enough. Whoa. Wow. Maybe that's what you heard. Maybe. It felt awesome. Did his wife have long hair? Yeah. Hair. Hair.

Is this what we're getting to? It was you. I said enough, dude. And then I leaned back and I thought about the whole show, you know? Yeah. Right when the show ended, I go, Hey, sorry about that, man. He was like, no, it's fine. I told you Arizona's wild. It's too hot. It's just too hot out there. There's not enough humidity. You need some.

But I've never confronted anybody in a moment like that. Do you think that guy even knew what you meant by enough? I don't think I know. He heard the tone of my voice. He knew what was going on. He knew he was misbehaving. So he's relating to Nate's comedy and having a good time, and you told him to stop. But thousands of other people were doing that without conversing about it right after the joke. We needed you in the audience of the shows we did in Arizona. Yeah, we had.

Probably. I would like, I had Aaron walk around just, if people, if they laughed too loud, not high enough. Right. He would just keep them kind of at bay. If they weren't really laughing, he's like, not enough. Not enough. Up, up, up, up, up. And then if they started laughing too loud, I'd go, what are we doing? Aaron just grabs his shoulder. Hey, what are we doing? And if their hair was too long, he would just pin it to the chair. Yeah. Have you never called 911 before?

Not that I may. I feel like maybe once. For me? Yeah. No, I feel like maybe once. I think I've had an accident maybe. Yeah. Like an accidentally called. Have you called it? Yeah, I've called before. How many times? A bunch. Probably four or five times now that I think about it. What are you doing? If I just see a car, if I see a car accident. Your gout flares up? I've been in a few accidents where you're supposed to call 911 and tell them.

If you're on the side of the road. Four or five times. Probably four or five times. I've called so many times. Well, that's a trade-off. I mean, that's like number three on the speed dial. Yeah. I would want to go, hey, Dustin. It goes your grandmother, mom, 911. That's your speed dial. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, it's like, that's, yeah. I mean, just all the time. Like how, you know, you see a fire, you're like, well, I'll call. It's like a fun, it's fun to be the one that calls. Where do you see a fire at? Just people's houses. You know what I mean? Like just driving a house is on fire. One time we called 911 and,

It's a lot of fun. Just making sure y'all heard about it. My sister is diabetic. Have you honestly called it a lot? Yeah. Oh, yeah. My sister is real diabetic. She used to go into these weird kind of diabetic trances or whatever. And we would call. We would have to call that 911. 911.

Ambulance to come and like give her some glucose. I better go. I don't know if she's on one of her. But she's just, you know. She's on her diabetes dance right now. She'd just be sitting there like staring off into space. You couldn't get her to do anything. Margaret. Margaret. Margaret.

Call 911. I is dusty. She doing her dance. She doing her long stare. She's back at it. She's back at it. Yeah, she would. She had a couple of M&Ms. Set her off. I got a trail stick. Yeah. A little compass on the top. On stage? No, no. Just, you know. Did you say compass? Yeah, a little compass on the top. That compass? Yeah. C-O. Comp. That is how it's spelled.

I've never heard it pronounced that way, though. Yeah, compass. Not you guys, I think the world. That's how you say it? Compass. Compass. Well, he does it. I like to do a compass. He's a little... That's Lebanon for you. Yeah, yeah. Like a little thing. Yeah, we're related. They do their own thing, yeah. Yeah, compass. Compass. Yeah. There's no... I don't think people... If you were...

If you were standing with a man that had only a compass in his hand and you said, hand me that compass, I don't think he would guess what to do. I think he would be confused and go, what? And then you would be the compass. And you would have to point at it and it never would be talked about.

And y'all would just leave. And he would be like, God, am I crazy? Am I saying this wrong? And then would maybe start saying compass personally in his own life until he got ridiculed. And then. Yeah. I mean, this is the first time I've encountered it. I don't say compass a lot out in the world, but this is the first I've come across it. Compass. Yeah. I don't. Yeah. Yeah.

That's like, it would, yeah. I mean, I've just never heard it. I'm not saying I'm right or wrong or whatever. What about the word complain? I guess that's see you. Yeah, complain. Not a complain. Why are you complaining all the time? Yeah, all right. Why are you complaining? What's another one? Comcast. We don't do comcast. Come on over here. Yeah, just the word com. You don't say com over here.

But that's got an E at the end. Okay. That's why I think the E makes it. All right. I got you. It's a language episode, I believe. Yeah. Ben Meehan. Ben Meehan. Meehan. Meehan.

I recently convinced my wife to start listening to the podcast, and she happened to be watching the malls episode this morning. I overheard Aaron getting sappy about how malls bring everyone together, yada, yada, yada. I knew it sounded familiar. I think what's still appealing about a mall is there's no other place in American life where there's just a

Just a cross section. All different types of people are in there. I don't know if there's another place where you go and you just see people all different backgrounds.

It's America. Everybody has to stop there. I think that's still... It looks... Yeah. Wow. I mean, it's word for word almost. It's unbelievable. Some of these drinks should float. Some of them should not. You guys want to guess before we do it? I'm betting diet floats.

I'm trying to think what I would have dropped in a lake before. And if you look at the cans. I think diet floats. If you look at the cans, they're all the same size. So if you're listening, what we've got on the table here is a tub full of water. And in front of it, we've got four different caffeinated beverages. Not necessarily caffeinated, but carbonated.

Diet Coke, Coke Zero, regular Coke, and then a Pepsi. Wild Cherry. Pepsi Wild Cherry. I meant to get regular Pepsi, but I grabbed it too fast. I don't know. Wild Cherry might be a variable, but do you want to try it, Nate? I do enjoy a Wild Cherry Pepsi. Now, I think that the Coke Zero and the Diet Coke are completely suspended. Yeah. Are they? Yeah. Okay. The Coke, regular Coke is Dragon. Oh, yeah, they are.

That's kind of floating. If the bucket were deeper, we'd get a better illustration of this. So, Brian, why does the diet float in them? Because it doesn't have sugar. Sugar is denser than water. So regular soft drinks are denser than water. But diet drinks are less dense than water. So, therefore, they float. I mean...

The physics episode. And that's going to be the end of it. We saved up for that. You know what it is? It's the sugar inside of it. Well, this was the physics for kids experiment that they gave us. Yeah. This is how they're teaching the kids. And then when the experiments are over, they go, crack these open. I mean, I'm not saying I knew that. It's like OJ with the glove. Tried it on. It's about trying. Always remember, people are listening.

I'm Nate. Aaron Weber. Dusty Slay. All right. And another Dusty Slay. All right. That's what I'm talking about. All right. We're having a good time. All right. Having a good time. We could use more of this. Ash, the sheriff hat. Where'd you get that hat? This is, it's not easy being dusty. I've learned that. Yeah. The hat is, I can't even talk with this thing.

Hang on. The hat is my second cousin, Terry Ash. He was the sheriff in Wilson County for about 20 years. Wow, that's a good hat. From the mid-80s to the mid-2000s. So the hat was the easiest part. Yeah. This beard riding up on my mouth here is the hard part. Yeah, beard. The hair, I had a brown wig, but it was like a clam rock, too long. Yeah. I wish I'd have kept it. So my wife convinced me to take it back. Yeah.

You kind of got the opposite color thing going. I got the darker beard and the lighter hair. Which is, I think, good. Yeah. I think it's a nice... Yeah, a little mismatch here. Yeah. Kind of works well. Yeah. So I took it back. My wife convinced me to take it back and get a shorter... How much money did that save you taking it back? Wig.

It saved me $250. Okay. This looks good on you. I mean, I'm into this look. The glasses were the hard part. I texted Dusty. I said, hey, where do you get your glasses? He said at a thrift store. I got my others at a thrift store. Yeah. I went to Goodwill. Didn't have glasses. Got this shirt at Goodwill. Yeah. And then I went to another thrift store. Could not find the glasses. Had to order these online.

It's the best I could do. How much total all in? About $100. Oh, really? Wow. That's about right. That's about right. $100 for the whole. Yeah. The glasses were like 30-something just for the shipping. The shirt was five. You save the money by just getting a haircut once or twice a year. Yeah. A lot of savings comes in there. I'm saying, okay, yeah. So are you going to ask Nate to make a pitch for Nashville?

Well, 2026 is out, but maybe a future. 2030. You know, when they come back that quick, I mean, we're in trouble. If you pitch well enough. It's already a bad start to this pitch. Yeah. What I'm saying, let's say you were sent to represent Nashville. Well, I think when we go to. All of us. Yeah. We should all go. When we go, give us the World Cup in 2030 or you will be embarrassed. You have 24 hours. Yeah. Nashville, a place you can drink. Yeah. Yeah.

Have you seen Broadway? Give us the World Cup. We won it on an off year. You've been warned. 24 hours. I'll give you 40 hours to respond. Yeah, until sundown. Yeah, until sundown. I need an answer now or we're going to move on and we're going to get the...

We'll get the tour de France. I'm going to go to the tour de France and go, hi, I'm neighbor I guess. Y'all running this bike race in France. No one cares. Come do it in America, Nashville. You can either be with us or you can compete with us.

You have 24 hours. And I'll go to every big sporting event. Just keep threatening them. You just keep threatening every one of them. You know, I don't know what other, yeah. I don't know what other sports are. But pickleball. Pickleball championship. I'm Nate Bergen. Bring it here or die. Yeah. We like pickleball, kind of. But I feel like we're going to love it. So either be here now.

and grow it with us yep our be our competition well there's 24 hours this will be a big day tomorrow there's a lot of a lot of phone calls tomorrow I'm making everybody crack your knuckles we're gonna be getting some responses some emails all right we love you all and Merry Christmas Happy New Year and we will see you the first week of January all right bye

Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.