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Hey, is your friend mell, and welcome to the new Robin's podcast. So I have something pretty amazing that I want to give you today. It's exactly what you need to hear.
IT is not just a pp tok. IT is the kind of message that a really dear friend who's fed up with you delivers straight between the eyes. What am I talking about? I'm talking about your dreams. You are the kind of person just like me that every single year you write down the things that you want your life.
And as each year rolls on and the new list gets written, you move the thing they didn't work on this year to the list that you do for the next year and on and on and on. I mean, how many years you've been thinking about writing a book or changing your job, or changing where you live, or healing some aspect of your past, or finding love, or learning how to love yourself, or starting that business, these things that you hold in your heart? They are meant to be out in the world.
And today i'm on a mission to get you to stop waiting. Stop waiting for the perfect time. Stop waiting to feel ready.
Stop waiting for the money. Stop waiting for permission. Stop waiting to feel like somebody. He's gna care about this.
The only person that needs to care enough is you, because today is the day that you're onna pick up the pen, you're going to start the research. You're gona commit to taking action. why? Because that's what you're meant to do with your life.
You're meant to create a bigger vision for yourself. And the reason why I wanted to talk to about this today is because I know you need to hear IT see, a couple weeks ago, we did a episode on impostor center remen. Pastor troy is just self doubt.
It's just when you intellectualize your self doubt and you talk yourself out of doing what you want to do, you tell yourself, oh my god, I want to be a singer. I want to be a writer. I want, I want to travel more.
I want to do this. I want to do that. I want to do the other thing. And then you tell yourself you're not ready, that you're not worthy, that it's not going to happen for you. Now that episode that are referring to, it's called the four words of silence, self out.
And on the day that we released IT within an hour, the response was so overwhelming, I realized, I have to talk to you. I need to talk to you about how you're holding yourself back from pursuing the goals that you want to pursue in your life. And here's what made me realized.
We got to talk about this, and we got to talk about IT right now, first of all, on the morning that the episode are number one, I woke up and there was already a voice memo from a friend of mine. SHE was only half fully through the episode. SHE was already starting to tear up because the episode made her think about this dream of writing a book, publishing a book and how she's been putting IT off because herself out and feeling like an imposter.
IT is kept her from picking up the pen. Well, why are you? You just hear for yourself.
hi mail hh impartially, thw kindles and poster commentary. And I had to stop IT right in my missing moment to tell her and you, as a woman who's soon going to be sixty, I feel the impostor syndrome too. I've had have a book deal sitting on my death since two thousand and six.
Too self doubting to take the risk of judgment. Or I am not a respected writer. Oh, IT isn't that interesting to actually pin IT. It's been on the top of my annual goal list for almost twenty years now, yet remains just a dream due to every impostor excuse and cannot follow through.
I teared up when I got to that part of me a message which is actually the most powerful awareness, talk about a double barrow of self glt. I just wanted, thank you, kindle, for being raw and real. And I want you to go for IT.
You got this. Imagine how far you will be in twenty years. And thank you. Male, you just don't know who you might be touching, and I appreciate all your kindness and love to the universe.
You know, IT strikes me about that. This is what hit me time, twenty years, that for twenty years he would put on her annual list of goals. Read a book, read a book, read book, read a book, read a book.
I bet you make a list of dreams and goals, don't you? I do. Every single year I write them all down.
And when the next year rules around, there's usually wonder two that I moved from one page to the other page. For me, I was always start a podcast, start a podcast, start a podcast. And so much fucking time went by where I Carried this dream from one page to the next.
And you know, it's funny, is now that i've launched the podcast, I said here, I think now why did you waste so many years thinking about this podcast and doing nothing about IT? Well, i'm sure for the same reasons that you're wasting time to begin with, I didn't have to do IT. Plus I had so much going on from the little things like I got to get dinner on the table to the big things someone else has already done.
IT. Esty, there were in less reasons. I got college tours this week.
What if I do IT? And it's a disaster. Like, it's embarrassing. How bad at us, by the way, who am I to compete with the people that are already doing IT that i've already said everything like georgine and Alice Cooper and mp r and everybody else.
And by the way, all the good ideas, they're already out there. I end. There's no room for me and I don't even know how to get started at this.
I mean, the excuses are endless, but time is just think about that. Your excuses are endless, but time isn't. Think about all the time the best.
Not only was this something that my friend had written on our annual goal list, SHE actually wrote a book proposal and he got an offer. And IT was sitting on her desk since two thousand six. That's eighteen years. What a shame.
You know, when you hear somebody's got a goal and they've just kind of like been pushed off for a week or two or a month like OK on get over yourself, come on, get your ask work and on IT, let's go. But when you think about how much time you've wasted. That's a lot.
And look, I don't want to scare you, but I kind of want to take my hands right now and on your cheeks or your shoulders and shake you because I went to wake you up and I need you to realize that your life is a melting ice cube. And I think we all believe that we have time, that at some point it'll be the right time, that someday you'll feel ready, that someday it'll be perfect, that someday you'll be a legitimate writer, that someday you have something to say. And i'm here to tell you right now that today is that someday you always use your whole life.
You will watch time take by waiting for some data come, and you will watch that ice cream melt. And you are listening to this right now, because you needed to hear this. You have on that secret list that you either have on a piece of paper.
You have tucked into your heart, a dream, a goal, something that you want to change, that you are too fucking scared to get started on. And today, that ends. Today, you're gonna stop waiting.
You're gone to stop wishing you're gone to stop, waiting for the right time, waiting for this to happen, waiting for the other thing to happen, waiting for you to feel ready, waiting for this, waiting for that. That ice cube is gonna be a puddle that will evaporate if you keep doing that. And I am not onna.
Let twenty years go by no way, not your life, not in my life, not my friend's life. Today we make a commitment to ourselves that we are going to get started. And I know you need to hear this for me today, because the second thing that happened after we released that episode is that within twenty four hours of IT going live, Cathy was only the first person to reach out to me.
Within hours, there were over seven hundred messages from listeners of this podcast from around the world talking about their dreams and their goals, and how and posters and had taken them down and how they felt paralyzed in awkward. And how many times have you look back on your life and thought, I wish I had started something sooner. I wish I had done this thing.
I wish I had done that thing. I'm going to tell you some, the biggest regret that you will ever have in your entire life is that you didn't push through the fear. You didn't push through the bullshit and posture syndrome.
You didn't push through the self doubt and gets started on the dreams that you have on the life you wanna create. And so today, this conversation is dedicated to your dreams. It's dedicated to the courage and the fire inside you and your capability of moving from thinking and wishing and wanting things in your life to finding the courage to take action and make them happen, and is not gonna easy.
Now, no is IT worth at always. It's scary to won something, and it's frustrating when you know in your heart that is fear. That is keeping you from getting started.
My mission today is to kick you in the so that you push through the fear and the insecurity and the impostor syndrome and the sadness and the regret or whatever IT is that told you back from taking the actions that you are capable of taking over time to chip away at this dream and this vision of a bigger life. I want you to start to see something bigger for yourself. And more importantly, I want you to start working on IT.
And what does that look like? What does that look like? But what i'm going to boil IT down, it's very simple.
It's about time and energy that all that this is about, you do not have to write that book overnight. You have to pick up the fucking pen. You do not have to become a physician overnight.
You have to research schools and then you have to apply. Today, we are gonna begin the process of moving from the dream world and the doubt world into the real world. And i'm going to bring in a metaphor that I think is really important.
And it's a metaphor that I used in a project that we did with auto called reinvent your life. I like to think about life as one long road trip. Every year of your life is a mile marker on the road of life.
And the thing about this road trip is it's a solo journey. You started at mile zero and you were alone. That how you came into this world, and wherever the road of your life leads you, when you leave this world, you're gonna alone.
Yes, you're gona drive parallel with some people. Yes, you're going to intersect with some people. Yeah, you're going to travel in packs, but you are driving alone. And look, i'm not telling you this to make you feel isolated or unsupported. That's the last thing that I want you to feel.
The reason why i'm telling you this is because I want you to understand the power that you have to make these dream part of your data day life as you pursue them. I mean, maybe you've been so worried about what everybody else is going to think, and that's what's kept you from starting your youtube channel or writing that screen play or making a career change. I'm here to tell you, no one gives a shit about what you do.
You wanna why? Because everybody else is driving their own car on their own solo journey, and they're busy trying to figure out their own life. When you realize that the only person who is truly judging you right now is you, when you embrace the, you're the one in your way, you can Spark a fire in your god.
Yes, IT sucks that my friend has been telling herself for twenty years that she's not a real writer, that she's not a respected writer, that it's not that interesting yeah that sucks to wake up and realize that you're the one that's been dragged yourself down but you wanted know IT sucks more spending another twenty years never writing IT. So step one, you have to acknowledge the thing that's on your list and that in your heart. And then step two is take responsibility for doing whatever you can, however you're capable in whatever bigger, small way to move towards.
Get serious about looking ahead instead of looking back, looking out the window in front of you, at the road ahead and where you want to a go, you can inch your way, day by day, week by week, months by month, year by year, to creating a whole new life for yourself. And that's not to say there's anything wrong with your life right now. It's to say that there are directions that you want to head in that you deserve to start paying attention to.
And i'm going to come back to how you do IT. It's time and its energy. Every single day, when you wake up, you can find five minutes or ten minutes or fifteen minutes to move from thinking about what you want to, taking action on what you want, picking up the pen, writing a sentence, sending an email, doing the research, taking a class.
All of these actions are how you move towards what you want while you're still in the life that you have. That's how you do IT. And the other thing that you're gonna to pay attention to his energy because just like you are wasting precious time on shift, that doesn't really matter to you.
You are also wasting your precious energy spending time with people who are draining IT from you who are not giving IT back to you every single day. When you wake up, I want you to pay attention to where you're putting your time and where you're putting your energy. And I want you to find five measly minutes to start working on what you want instead of keeping IT a secret in your heart and in your mind.
Way to you hear what your fellow listeners from one hundred and ninety four countries have to say about the dreams that they're holding onto, that they're afraid to pursue. And you're gone to hear those dreams, and then you're gone to hear the coaching that I have for all of you. Yes, you as you're sit, they're going on, oh, man, this is me. This is me.
Well, guess what? We're going to do some coaching when we get back because I am committed to getting you out of thinking about this stuff you've been writing down that you want. And I want today to be the day that you start working on IT don't go anywhere cause you need to hear this.
Oh, i'm so excited to tell you about what of our sponsors or a friends. I love them. why? Because like me, probably took a million photos this year.
Oakly graduated from high school. Christina, I went on this unforgettable vacation together. Our family climbed mount katon, where the photos a finally, they be on my phone, but not anymore.
Why I have an ora digital photo frame. IT sits on my kitchen counter. I gave one of my parents, it's on their kitchen counter. I gave IT to kendall, who lives in la oakly, up in the dorm room or is a digital frame that looks and feels like Normal picture frame. But check this out.
You just send photos to IT and all the sudden your photos are right there everywhere and IT updates all the time and your family can update IT. I free love IT. It's the best gift to give yourself. It's the best gift to give everyone else.
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I can't imagine working without IT start converting your B2B aud ience in the hig h qua lity lea ds tod ay. Doull even give you a hundred dollar credit on your next campaign. Go to linton 到 com flash mail to claim your credit, that's linton 点 com flash mail terms and conditions apply linked in the place to be to be。
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Welcome back. It's your friend male. And I am on fire today. I'm on fire because I am on a mission after hearing from so many of you about our impostor syndrome episode and how IT resonated is such a deep level how you realize that there are these things that you want to do with your life, but you're the one talk in yourself out of IT that you're the one who is an active participant in your own demise. And that's gonna today because I don't think you realized how much time you're wasting, how much energy you put into doing things that you don't want to be doing. Instead of carving out and fighting for small amounts of time and energy to propel yourself forward, you will start to see when you get serious about this, what an active participant you are in your own demise, how much time you waste, how much energy you pour in, the things that really aren't what you want.
And when you wake up and realize that time and energy is a secret, and taking this seriously from this moment forward, that the answer, not in big moves, but in the small daily rhymes that you can insert in little ways to just start honoring what you want in your life, I personally believe that working on your dreams and taking what you want life seriously enough that you do the work to make that a reality, I personally think this is the greatest act of love that you could ever give to yourself. That is the engine that fuels the joy and the fulfilment that you're gonna feel in your life. Let me share some of the things that fellow listeners wrote to us about as soon as that episode ired mail.
I dreamed about being a motivational speaker. But I lack the experience, and I lack the plan. Let me just stop right there.
Let's just stop right there. Of course, you like the experience you've ever done this before. That's why you doubt yourself. That's why you feel like an imposter. You haven't done IT before. And so the first thing that I want to tell you is that this is good news, is good news because IT doesn't mean you're gonna do IT. It's good news because IT just means your beginning and being a beginner is so cool because we gonna learn so much.
You know, we talked about this exact point in that episode, told you about earlier, the one that got Cathy crying about the book that SHE hadn't written, and they got so many of you to por in the stories about how you've got dreams that you've been putting off because you lack experience. So I need to dry this point home about embracing the fact that you don't lack experience, you're just a beginner. And I want you to embrace this idea that you're just a beginner.
So let me play you a moment from the original episode with my daughter, where she's describing this, am a beginner, a pipon y to you. Check this out. You can defuse the imposter syndrome if you just accept where you're at.
I think once I sort of owned where I mat, which is a beginner, i'm not in poster as a beginner, you know because that's what I am. Wait, say that again, i'm not an imposter if i'm a beginner because that's what I am. Yeah, then the impostor syndrome sort of disappears.
You're not an impostor. You're just a beginner. Did you hear that? So that dream that you have, that thing that you've never done, great, great. You are a beginner and that's amazing because everybody starts the beginner.
But as long as you refuse to start moving toward the things you want to create, your standing still in your life and time is passing nearby. And we're not gonna that happen. Because when IT comes to the things that we all want to create our lives, we're all beginners. I'm in a radio, a few more that i've come in from listeners. I want to pursue a career as a fashion editor, but i'm afraid at thirty four of making a huge career change.
Let me tell you, what's more scary than making a career change at thirty four is spending the next thirty four years of your life in a career you didn't like and being sixty eight and looking back at this moment when you were thirty four or thirty one or eighteen or fifty four or thirty nine and wishing, wishing you had made the career change. Do not waste your life doing things that don't fulfill you. You have the ability starting today to change the direction that you're driving in.
Are you gonna arrive at this new career overnight as a fashion editor? no. But you won't arrive there ever.
If you don't take the wheel and turn IT in the direction that you want to go and start inching towards, this is what i'm talking about. Here's another one. I want to design close.
I'm thirty one and I haven't achieved anything though. Well, of course I haven't. How are you supposed to design close? If you're not designing close? How are you supposed to make that change if you are only thinking about IT or writing IT on a list?
When I say that I want you to start driving toward your dreams, I want you to start taking action, what that means is IT means that you need to start to take your time and your energy, and in whatever way you can, in whatever capacity that you can, you need to start to direct your time and energy at the things that you want, not at the things that you have. And look, I know so many of you have really full lives right now, your single parents, your caring for aging parents, you're underwater with your bills. You've got ten minute today.
You've got five minutes today. You've got fifteen minutes today. And that's what I want to inspire you to start doing. I feel so adamant about this, because time keeps going, even if you don't.
Because when you're so in IT, you're so busy in your data day life, as IT is right now, that you can see the bigger picture. Time is passing. It's always passing.
I'll give you example for my own life. I think a lot about this moment where, after we sold our housework, we raised our kids outside of boston, where we spent twenty six years. I always thought when I lived there, I would live there forever. I just took IT for granted. And over a year ago, I drove down the street that I had been driving up and down for twenty six years for the very last time.
And I saw the house that i'd raise, ed, my kids, and disappearing in the real view, mere for the last time I say that because eventually you're gonna look back on this moment too, and you're gonna think, my god, I wish I had begun back then. I wish I had started. I wish I had had fucking.
I know it's not gonna en overnight, but i'm not onna. Let my entire life go by just thinking about this thing that I want to create. I'm gonna try.
I'm gna step out of the thinking and on step into the doing, because it's never gonna feel like the right time. It's never gonna feel perfect. You're not gonna feel worthy until you actually start taking the actions.
I want you to stop waiting to create what you want your life. If you want to make art, make art. If you want to write, write.
If you want to travel, you got ta figure out how you can travel. You are missing out on everything because you're waiting for someday. You're waiting for someday to feel already someday, for IT to be perfect someday.
Well, i'll tell you what today is that someday, and my mission today is to light a fire under your ass and have IT burned so bright that that fire inside you becomes the engine that drives you. And that's exactly what i'm going to do after we take a short break and hear a word from our sponsors. Don't you dare go anywhere. I'll be waiting for you when you come back.
You know that there's one thing that I know about you because you listen to this podcast that you have big ambitions. You care about your goals. And the question is, are you there yet? If you're not, that's a good thing.
The highest achiever s among us all are the people who are still striving. People like you still reaching for something bond, what's right in front you. And for people who approached the impossible and embrace IT, there's a for you.
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Welcome back if your power mill robbins. And today is the day that you to start that right. Today is the day that you find the courage and you carve out a little time and you direct your energy and a brand new direction.
why? Because you deserve that. And just so you're clear those excuses that you have, they did not fire.
Remember what I said earlier? You are full of excuses, but you're run at a time. So let me stop the flames of a little more coaching.
Here's some more dreams of listeners. I want to leave my corporate job and started something on my own, but I fear failure. Here's the interesting thing about letting failure stop you.
What do you feel when you show up at a corporate job every single day that you don't like and you've got this dream very deep inside you and you know you're not working on IT. Who are you fAiling? You're fAiling yourself because you're not taking any action on your dreams.
And that's sad. Here's another person talking about fear. The fear holding me back is taking a risk to change what has become my norm.
See, that's a form of fear. Fear can be disguise, ed, as same as this is a really sneaky way that fear sneaks in your life. It's why it's so hard to get off the couch.
It's why it's hard to work out. It's why it's hard to leave a job that you've had for ten years despite the fact that you want more, you deserve more, you're willing to work for more. It's just fear you're used to what you have.
Do not let that low you into a sleep because what will happen as decades will go by. That's exactly what happened to me every single year when I would write on a list. What I wanted in my life hosting a radio show is at top of that, I think I was a huge Howard stern fan.
I didn't listen to Howard stern since I was in my mid thirties. I just love Howard stern. And I would write, I want to be redos want to be redos right to be redos want to be redos.
And then when the podcast markets served, oh, I want to be a podcasts sters, I want to be a podcasts er, but I want to be hard cancers. I did the exact same thing. I was so used to my current life, I kept him.
Why on how to fit that? And i've never done that before. Who's going to listen to me? I don't have anything to say. I put all my time and energy into talking myself out of working for what I wanted. Here's another one. I'd like to work in the film industry as a director and writer in los Angeles, but I currently live in europe and i'm working in marketing.
okay? Okay, you want to be tortured by your dreams, or do you want to work for them? How about signing up for a screen writing class in a producing class while you're in europe? How about making a plan? How about you stop thinking about IT and arguing about what you're currently doing? And you put your time and energy and to figure out how to do what you'd actually like to do.
See in life, time and energy are your two biggest commodities. Your life is like a melting ice cube every day that goes by. IT melts a little bit more. You you've been so busy waiting for somebody else to tell you it's OK to do IT that you're missing the real power in pushing yourself through the fear and the imposter synergy and the self doubt. And that's why I so want you to start to take this seriously, that today be the day that you get started.
You can find five, ten, fifteen minutes a day to search, chipping away and doing the work, to figure out how to make some version of what you want a reality in your life. And we know, based on the research and based on what you learn on this podcast, is simply spending time everyday working on something that really matters to you is the secret to bringing more meaning and enjoy into your life. why? Because when you start to acknowledge your dreams by working on them, you validate something deep within your soul.
It's an act of love to do that for yourself. So I think we get love all wrong. I think we believe that love is something that someone else gives to you.
That's not true. Ultimately, love is something that you give to yourself. It's something that you create.
And love again, is what you're gona feel when you stop thinking about the things that you want your life, and you step into the physical world of them by beginning the work to make them a reality. I'll tell you another dream mind. I really want to arrive a trilogy like a fiction trilogy.
I'm not going to tell you the things I don't want. I want to steal IT, but I don't know how to do that. And it's been in the back of my mind for a long time.
And what I know is if I were to simply sign up for, i'm kind of class, even online, on fiction, fantasy, novel writing, that would bring my dreams out of the intellectual or the conceptual and into the physical realm, and that makes IT real. Do I ever have to write the book? No, simply working on IT brings something alive inside of you.
What you bring to each and every day that you wake up is what you're going to create more and more of. And that's the secret. Everybody talks about habits and how habits, like help you determine who you are.
I wanted bottle IT down to make IT even more simple. Where you put your time and energy every single day will define the life you create. And so if you're putting your energy into relationships where you're not getting back what you deserve, that is a waste of time, a waste of your precious time.
I might add another listener rights. The impostor episode was key for me, and I realized i've been filling my time with other things so I don't have to do what i'm afraid of. I'm going to come back to this concept of time and energy. Is the time that you have during the day i'm talking five, ten, fifteen minutes.
Are you directing IT at what you want to create? Or are you just mindless lesly going through the day and through the routine and keeping everything the same? The energy that you're putting into relationships are those relationships that are giving you something back in return?
I am here to tell you, you can change your life by waking up every day, being very clear about what you want, taking responsibility for creating IT day by day by day, and slowly redirecting your time and energy toward the things that you want. It's just like pointing your car in a new direction and driving forward. And ultimately, IT takes you somewhere new.
And that brings me back to why I wanted to talk to about this, because this is really a conversation about love, is not about fear. It's about love, because love is something you give to yourself. It's something that you can create. And love is the engine and the fuel that will bring more joy and fulfillment in your life. And so how do you start with yourself?
Well, the more that you wake up every day and you direct your time and your energy toward the things that you really want to create your life and the relationships that give you energy back, you will be feeling and creating more love for yourself. And you know how I keep talking about the fuel and the fire in the engine. Well, that love, what can drive your life forward, is creating love from within.
That's why this matter so much. And I have another listener writing, and I want to become a surgeon, but the process is very complicated. Well, no shit. IT is very complicated if you look at the end result. But it's not complicated at all.
If you wake up every day and you ask yourself, how can I pour time and energy today in a small way into this thing that I want to create? And when you start to get that intentional, when you take responsibility for what you want and moving your life in small ways every single day toward IT, everything changes, and it's not that complicated at all. And this final one for A, I still want to be an actor after all of these years, but i'm a coward.
No, you're not. You're just a beginner. That's all that you are. That's all that I am. That's all that everybody is.
What IT comes to, the things you've never done, the dreams that you haven't begun working on. You're not afraid, you're not an imposter. You're not unworthy. You're just a beginner. And all that a beginner needs to do is wake up every day and in small ways, point their time in their energy told, working at IT. And if you do that one of these days, you'll wake up maybe it'll be someday soon, maybe it'll be a decade for now, but you'll wake up.
And that dream that you've been writing on your list and moving from one piece of paper to another year after year will stop being a thing that you think about. And IT will become what your life is centered around because you're the one that woke up and made IT happen day by day, week by week, months, five months, year by year, that how you get IT done. I told you this was exactly what you needed to hear. And here's what I want you to tell me. I want you to tell me the one action you're gonna take today.
I want you to flood my inbox and the forms at mell robbin stock com slash podcast with stories of what you did not what you're wishing for or wanting, or the self doubt or the fears make today, that someday that you've been waiting for, and then tell me what you did, so I can cheer for you and celebrate you because, you know, I love you and I believe in you, and I believe in your ability to move from the doing world and the doubt world into the doing world and make what you want a reality. And by god, you also know i'll be here, drive inside by side with you on the solo journey called life, cheering for you every single step of the way I love you. Go to IT and share this episode with someone you love.
Oh, my god, that's so lb can then we hear that. I think that we can hear that. Okay, it's pretty oud out there.
Can we shot that thing? Is that a truck? I no idea might be, I don't know, good boys. Oh, sorry, I think where I was is that IT? That's IT, okay.
Oh, and one more thing I know, this is not a bleepers. This is the legal language. You know what the lawyers, right? And what I need to read you.
This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I'm just your friend. I am not a license therapies, and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional.
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