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cover of episode You Are a Badass: Unlock Your Most Authentic Self in 4 Proven Steps

You Are a Badass: Unlock Your Most Authentic Self in 4 Proven Steps

2023/7/24
logo of podcast The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Mel Robbins Podcast
AI Deep Dive AI Chapters Transcript
People
M
Mel
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Ritu Bhasin
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Mel: 成为最真实的自己意味着接纳真实的自我，包括优点和缺点，并勇敢地展现真实的自我。长期以来，她努力取悦他人，试图成为别人眼中的样子，让她感到痛苦不堪。最终，她意识到接纳真实的自己才是解脱之道。 Ritu Bhasin: 她制作了一个关于如何正确发音她名字的视频，是为了宣示自我认同，并帮助他人正确发音她的名字，这体现了她对自我认同的重视和对他人同理心的表达。她认为，人们不必完全正确地发音她的名字，只要表达出关心和重视就足够了，这体现了她对同理心的理解。每一个行为，无论大小，都是她拥抱自我、宣示自我认同和归属感的一步。归属感是先从接纳真实的自我开始，然后才能与他人建立归属感。归属感是真实自我的结果，只有当我们真实地展现自我时，才能获得归属感。为了避免被评判，人们会戴上各种面具，扮演不同的角色，这种行为被称为“表演自我”。为了融入职场，她曾努力改变自己，隐藏真实的自我，但这种做法并不能带来真正的归属感。身体会比头脑更早地感知到我们是否处于舒适的状态，因此我们可以通过身体感受来判断自己是否在做真实的自己。对评判和偏见的恐惧会让我们压抑真实的自我，从而影响我们的归属感。她不使用“不真实”这个词，因为它带有负面含义，她认为人们戴上面具是因为内心的创伤和恐惧。培养核心智慧是她获得更多真实感、归属感和快乐的关键。核心智慧是一种内在的感知能力，帮助我们觉察自己的想法和感受，从而更好地理解自己。她会使用肯定句和自我鼓励的话语来应对压力和挑战。当我们感到被冒犯或不被尊重时，身体会做出反应，产生紧张和压力。为了更好地应对压力情况，应该提前做好准备，例如写下应对脚本、选择肯定句以及准备身体放松的方法。应对不舒服情境的三个步骤：提前写好应对脚本，选择自我肯定的语句，以及准备身体放松技巧。深呼吸有助于在压力情况下放松身心。提前预想可能会发生的场景，并做好应对准备，有助于增强自信和掌控感。提前预想负面情境并非为了吸引负面事件发生，而是为了做好准备，以更强大的姿态应对挑战。她理解人们在面对不公正待遇时需要提前做好准备，并认为这是一种宣示自我、争取归属感的方式。我们无法控制他人的行为，但可以控制自己的行为，重要的是要按照自己的真实想法行事。真实的自我指的是在没有负面后果的情况下，我们展现自我的方式。表演自我指的是为了避免负面评价而改变自己行为的方式。适应性自我指的是在兼顾自身需求和他人需求的情况下，对行为进行调整。她鼓励听众思考并分享一个他们一直隐藏的真实的自我方面。

Deep Dive

Chapters
Mel Robbins discusses her journey to authenticity and the importance of showing up as your true self.
  • Mel's personal story of inauthenticity and its impact on her life.
  • The liberating feeling of accepting oneself and being authentic.
  • The importance of allowing oneself to express opinions, wear what you want, and opt out of situations that don't feel right.

Shownotes Transcript

In this episode, renowned researcher, bestselling author, and total badass Ritu Bhasin will help you step into your power.

 

Her work proves that a better life begins when you stop trying to fit in and start showing up as your authentic self.

 

Does this sound like you?

 

  • You say yes to fit in.
  • You stay silent and let others talk over you during meetings.
  • You never ask for that raise you’ve earned.
  • You let your partner and friends make all the decisions.
  • You don’t have big goals because you’re afraid to fail.

 

 

Before you waste another day of your life pretending to be someone you're not, listen to this life-changing episode. 

 

You deserve better.

 

This episode will teach you how to make the rules and be who you want to be.

 

Ritu and I will teach you how to claim your confidence and live a bolder, badass life in 4 simple steps.

 

Game ON.

  

This is your time. Take it.

 

Xo, Mel

 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

 

 

  • 05:27: Why Ritu wanted to make an entire video about how to pronounce her name.
  • 09:08: What it means to stand in your power.
  • 12:53: Are you masking your true identity?
  • 18:32: Feeling comfortable with yourself vs. hiding who you really are…
  • 22:24: The pressure to perform shows up in the body in these ways…
  • 27:02: The #1 thing Ritu did to bring more belonging and authenticity into her life. 
  • 29:24: 3 steps to conquer uncomfortable situations.
  • 31:42: The mantra that Ritu repeats to herself to stay in control.
  • 37:11: The only thing you can control are your actions. 
  • 43:48: The most important version of your “self” looks like this..
  • 47:32: How to make others feel like they belong, too, and why that matters.
  • 49:52: You have 3 versions of your "self" - here’s what they are.
  • 52:54: We are all adults stuck in a middle school brain.
  • 58:38: The #1 takeaway I want you to get from this conversation.

 

 

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