How to Stop Quitting Everything You Start
The Mindset Mentor
Deep Dive
What is the Emotional Cycle of Change and who developed it?
The Emotional Cycle of Change is a psychological model that explains the emotional stages people go through when attempting to make a change. It was developed by psychologists Don Kelly and Daryl Connor. The model consists of five stages: uninformed optimism, informed pessimism, the valley of despair, informed optimism, and success and fulfillment.
What happens during the 'uninformed optimism' stage of the Emotional Cycle of Change?
In the uninformed optimism stage, individuals are excited about the potential benefits of a change but are unaware of the challenges ahead. They feel optimistic because they lack knowledge about the difficulties they will face. This stage is characterized by enthusiasm and excitement, but it is short-lived as reality sets in.
Why do people often quit during the 'informed pessimism' stage?
During the informed pessimism stage, individuals begin to see the costs and challenges of the change, which leads to frustration, anxiety, and a desire to quit. The benefits that once seemed exciting now feel less attainable, and the effort required appears overwhelming. This stage is where many projects fail because the emotional toll becomes too great.
What is the 'valley of despair' in the Emotional Cycle of Change?
The valley of despair is the lowest point in the Emotional Cycle of Change. At this stage, the pain of change is most apparent, and the benefits seem distant and unimportant. Many people quit here because it feels easier to return to old habits than to continue pushing through the challenges.
How can someone push through the 'valley of despair' stage?
To push through the valley of despair, it is crucial to have a compelling vision of the future and a clear understanding of why the change is important. Writing a letter to oneself during the uninformed optimism stage, detailing the reasons for starting, can serve as motivation during this difficult phase. Perseverance and focusing on the long-term benefits are key to overcoming this stage.
What characterizes the 'informed optimism' stage?
In the informed optimism stage, individuals start to see small successes and the benefits of their efforts. They become more optimistic because they have a clearer understanding of what it takes to succeed. This stage is marked by positive emotions and a sense that success is possible, as the fruits of their labor begin to show.
What is the final stage of the Emotional Cycle of Change?
The final stage is called success and fulfillment. At this point, the benefits of the change are fully experienced, and the costs are seen as worth it. The actions that were once difficult have become habits, and individuals feel a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment. Very few people reach this stage because many give up earlier in the cycle.
Why is it important to understand the Emotional Cycle of Change?
Understanding the Emotional Cycle of Change helps individuals anticipate and prepare for the emotional challenges they will face during a change. By identifying which stage they are in, they can use tools and strategies to cope with negative emotions and push through difficult phases, increasing their chances of success.
- Emotional cycle of change
- Uninformed optimism
- Informed pessimism
- Five stages of change