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Hello my beautiful people and welcome back to the moments podcast. I'm currently recording this on a Tuesday afternoon I just did my first brain scan and if you listen to last week's episode I told you a bunch about that But it was such a fun experience and I can't freaking wait. I have my second scan tomorrow and then I don't have my evaluation until the middle of May just because I have a bunch of stuff going on which I
I'm going to tie that into why I'm making this episode. I'm about to enter a phase of my life where I get super overwhelmed and I have a lot going on and I have all these incredible, amazing things coming up and opportunities and places that I'm going, things that I'm doing with the people that I love. And I've learned, you know, after doing self-reflection, which also has a lot to do with last week's episode, that when I'm doing all of these things, I get overwhelmed.
I tend to fall into a worse mental state, which I know doesn't really add up for a lot of people, but in my head, the more extroverted I'm forced to be and the more social I have to be, the harder time I have. I don't know how to explain it, but I think it's just because I gain energy from when I'm alone and
It's complicated because I also love doing things with people that I love, but it just drains me faster. Moral of the story, the point here is I've seen a pattern within myself that when I have months where I'm go, go, go, go, go, it tends to be harder for me to be extremely happy naturally. And that's not to say I'm not happy. Again, let me just emphasize the fact that I'm living my dream and I'm so grateful for everything that I get the chance to do.
But I don't really have control over what it does to my brain and how it makes me feel emotionally. But this weekend I, well, this week I have my brain scan. And then I have to take some prom pictures on Friday. And then I have a festival all weekend. And then I have a graduation party. And then next week I'm in Cayman Islands, which is going to be so fun. I'm actually so excited. And then I have, I don't know why I'm blanking.
A bunch of stuff coming up, and I'm going to be all over the place, and I'm going to be a little bit exhausted. And the one thing that I've also learned has helped me through all of these episodes of just kind of having a lot going on is appreciation. And that's something I touch on in every single episode, but I don't really ever give it a lot of time or its own moment to shine, but...
I can confidently say that being appreciative of everything we have going on in our lives and everyone that we have around us in our lives is the key to living a happier life. Like there's a few things. I would say keeping an open mind is one and we've done an episode on that. And then being appreciative and being grateful. And I don't know if the only reason I feel like this and I don't think it's just because of this. I think this is something universal. But especially...
I especially believe that I feel this way because when I was younger, me and my boyfriend, that's so weird to say still, we're talking about this in the car. We're like, what is the one thing that your parents drilled in you from your childhood till now? Like, what was the one thing that...
That you are always going to think of when you think of them. And my dad had two things that he reminded me every single day it felt like. The first one was, don't be stupid. Anytime I would leave the house to go to, even if it was just school or to a party or to go hang out with a boy or a friend, whatever it was, my dad would say, don't be stupid. And now I think about that 24-7. Sorry, I'm yawning. Hold on. Um...
I think about that 24-7. With everything I do in my life, I ask myself, is this stupid or is this something my dad would approve of? And the second thing that he always told me was to be appreciative, to say thank you, to live in the moment, like that kind of thing, to just appreciate the life that we get to live because we often forget how blessed we truly are. If you have...
food on your plate, if your parents are happy and healthy, if you have siblings that you have a relationship with, if you have friends that you can call if you need something, if you have
somewhere to go to the bathroom if you have a roof over your head if you can afford to buy something from a store that you like you have it 10 million times better than you will ever realize and I don't need to say like you and talk to you I'm talking to myself too we get caught up there are shitty things there are things going on that sometimes suck but when you take a really big step back and you view yourself from a bird's eye view from a further away perspective you
We have it really good. If you have the access to be able to be on a listening device, listening to this podcast through Spotify, where you're probably paying a monthly membership or Apple podcast, same idea. You have it good. We have it great. We are lucky. And when we learn to focus on that and remember that,
It makes life enjoyable for not only just us, but everyone around us too. There is so much value to being appreciative. And I was actually kind of trying to do a little bit of research before I started this episode, but then my phone died and I gave up on it. But there's a Harvard study that proves that being appreciative psychologically makes you happier. And I didn't even read the details of it because that's all I needed to know. I'm like, that is my proof in the pudding. That's the truth. And...
As much as I could sit here and tell you about what all of these studies say and give you the facts, I want to give it to you from a personal experience here. Because as I've said before, and I think in a lot of episodes just this year in general, gratitude and appreciation have been two of my biggest goals and goals.
When I tell you they've kind of shifted the way that I've seen the world, I really do mean that from the bottom of my heart. And I don't just mean being appreciative. Can I speak? Literally, no. I don't just mean being appreciative of things like when someone does something nice for you or when you get to go somewhere. Like, yes, of course, be appreciative of those things. But I mean down to the nitty gritty. I mean when you're driving and you get an extra green light.
Take a moment to notice that and to be aware of that. I was watching this TikTok the other day of some guy. He did a seven-day no complaining challenge. And he said in the beginning of the video that he didn't think he was someone who complained often. He never viewed himself as someone who was a complainer. And then he did this challenge. And when you do a challenge like that, any kind of challenge, you're forced to be aware of the things that you say and the things that you think. And he was like, I was complaining that I got a red light.
And he was just frustrated because of course you're going to get red lights. That shouldn't be something that should even take up space or have any impact on your energy or your mood. And I thought it was really cool. And it was something that I wanted to do. And just recording this podcast reminded me that I said I wanted to do that. But I think I'm going to because we complain about a lot of crap.
Even just waking up and being like, oh, I'm so tired. Or, oh, I really don't want to do that today. Or, oh, I have to do this. Or, oh my god, I gotta go to the gym. Or, oh, it's so hot outside. Or, cold outside. Or, the weather's so bad. We're always complaining. It's almost a second nature for us. And I think that, I don't know, I blame society for everything because I think society is to blame for most things. But...
We've just been given this idea that it's never good enough. We're never going to be happy. We're never going to be satisfied. We're never going to be completely fulfilled. I think the reality is that we can be. And the first step in doing that is just being aware of what it is that you're complaining about. And take a step back and ask yourself...
Why? Why? Is this something that I really need to be letting impact my mind, energy, feelings, emotions? Or is this just something that I'm doing on autopilot? Am I complaining about things for absolutely no reason because I've been complaining about them or hearing people complain about these things since I was little? That should make things a lot more clear for you. I really have been doing my best to notice this and I still don't think I'm fully aware of it.
But we're starting somewhere and we're getting somewhere with it too. I don't want to complain. I don't want to complain about anything. That being said, again, we're human. We're going to go through rough patches. There are going to be things to legitimately complain about sometimes and that's okay. But just make sure you're complaining about something worthy of complaining about. You're allowed to rant. Like I'm not going to sit here and tell you to be this
Does that make any sense? What am I saying here?
Just let the things come and let them pass. Don't dwell on the things that are making you angry or upset. And don't dwell on the stupid things that are making you angry or upset. You know? Feel your emotions, but then let them pass. And when you go through those phases, I think this is when the art of appreciation becomes the most valuable, actually. Because every time we come out of a funk or we're in a funk or a bad state in our lives, bad week, on your period, whatever it may be,
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Quick little intermission, you guys. We all know how important it is to prioritize the right things in our life. And maybe for you, that's prioritizing doing leg day at the gym or making sure you go for your hot girl walk. But how often are you prioritizing your mental health and making sure that therapy is a part of your weekly routine? If it's something that you've been open to, if it's something that you've been considering, I highly recommend BetterHelp. And thank you so much to BetterHelp for sponsoring this episode. And I'll see you in the next one.
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I do feel as though this episode is a little bit repetitive just because, gosh, I'm the most repetitive person of all time. But it's because this thing, this is valuable and everything ties together. So even if I'm doing a podcast on body image, it's probably going to have a lot of the same points, reminders and advice as a podcast on this, for example.
Most things tie together somehow when it comes to the mind and the way that we perceive the world and the way that we feel because it's all stringed together and sometimes you just need to pour a little bit more energy into one thing to make you feel better about another thing. Pouring energy into appreciating your body is going to make you love yourself more and pouring appreciation into your life in general is going to make you love your life more.
once again, it's a miracle that you are alive. And I don't ever want you to doubt for a second that you're not meant to be here. And whenever I do find myself in a really low place or just one of those moods or mindsets where I don't feel I have a purpose or I'm really overwhelmed and I feel behind everyone and everything, I simply remind myself that
It's a miracle that I'm here. I know I'm supposed to be here. And even if I don't know exactly what I'm supposed to be here for right now, that doesn't matter because I know that the purpose is there. And I know that it'll find its way to me when it's supposed to because if you really look back, it hasn't failed you yet. You've made it this far. You've made it through everything you've already made it through. And think about all the good memories and everything you've been able to do and experience in between.
There is more good to come and great things are going to happen for you and they're going to come to you. And it gets easier to believe this when you look back and appreciate all the times that life has pulled through in the past. And just to tie this back into last week's episode about self-reflection.
If you reflect on your life, you realize how many good things have happened for you. And when we don't reflect, we kind of don't realize how lucky we've had it or how many cool things we've got to do. But when you can appreciate those and know that they happened, you can find this new kind of confidence and peace that that is going to continue to happen in your life. You know what I'm saying? Picking up what I'm putting down. Another thing, I just want you to...
I want you to appreciate the people in your life. I want you to appreciate your family. And I don't know if anyone is at the age listening to this where maybe, let's say, your relationship with your parents isn't that good because I've been there. I've been in that phase. And I look back and I wish someone would have told me what I know now. And that is simply that 99% of the time, your parents...
are looking out for you and I know that everyone's situation is different and there are really really toxic parents out there who have not great intentions for their children but
high percentage of the time your parents are looking out for you and if someone told me that in high school when my mom wasn't letting me go to parties or hang out with the people that I wanted to hang out with I would have probably just looked at them and laughed in their face because I thought my mom just did not want me to win I thought she didn't want me to have friends or enjoy my life or be cool and popular because you know at the time that was what was the most important thing to me and I
Look back now and realize she probably saved my life in a lot of ways She knew exactly who I shouldn't be hanging around and she knew Exactly who I should keep around and she always encouraged me to keep My real friends around and wouldn't let me go do things with the people that she didn't trust Your parents are looking out for you your parents want to see you happy and they want to see you successful And they want to see you
Make your dreams come true. And they don't want to send you to hang out with people where they're going to be worried about you being okay with your own life and with the law and with whatever it may be. Sometimes it's hard to talk about these specific topics or high school because with all of us listening to this, we all had different experiences in high school and we all have different relationships with our parents, which is why I'm trying to keep this somewhat general because
But I also think that it's hard to communicate with your parents in high school. And I can say all these things to you and it might not change everything. It might not completely change the way that you feel. But I want you to just kind of start to become aware of what your parents are saying no to. And really think about it as if you were their age and as if you had a kid. Would you want them doing the things that you're asking them to let you do?
I don't know. It just helps when you put yourself in someone else's shoes or you put yourself in their shoes and just see why it might stress them out. And then that might be able to help you ask them in a different way or communicate with them better. Wherever you're at, just know, okay, your parents want to see you win most of the time. And I know it's hard to communicate with them and I know that it's hard to talk to them about a lot of different things, but...
You got it. Okay? Just take it one step at a time. And don't get so angry at them and don't get so upset with them because one day they're going to be your best friends and you're going to look back and just wish that you were closer with them when you weren't. Because sadly our time with our family and with our friends is always fleeting. You know, life is short and I don't want to be deep and all that, but it's real. And the more that we can appreciate the things while we have them, the easier it will be
when we don't have them anymore? Does that make any sense? I don't know what I'm talking about. Anyways, I also want you to appreciate your friends. And I don't just mean like for yourself thinking about how lucky you are to have your friends. I mean, physically show them your appreciation. Okay, be a good friend. Tell people you love them. Figure out what your friends and your family's love languages are and
supply to them. Like if you have a best friend whose love language is words of affirmation, it takes two seconds out of your day to text her, hey, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you. I love you. Keep doing what you're doing. And if you have a best friend whose love language is gift giving and their favorite candy is Reese's, spend the $2 to buy them a Reese's at the store and bring it to them. Because what you'll do is
change the course of their day. Make them feel better. Build a relationship even stronger between you two. And then hopefully they'll take that and they'll pay it forward. We don't realize the impact that we have when we do one kind thing for someone. And it doesn't have to be a stranger. It can just be an act of kindness to a parent, a grandparent, a family member, a friend. Paying it forward goes a long way. And I
I don't know. It just helps us appreciate this life a little bit more and I think that simply we need to be kinder to each other. It's as easy as that. It's not going to fix everything. It's not going to change everything but everyone is out to get at one another right now and I can't be the only one that sees that or notices that. We're all fighting over nothing.
For silly reasons. I mean, I posted a TikTok about religion. Oh, I think I talked about this on last week's episode. About religion a few weeks ago now. And people are still commenting on it. And it's just frustrating because whether or not we agree on how we view religion...
There's a reason that we have freedom of religion. We're supposed to have different opinions and view things different ways. And it shouldn't cause this war between us and other people. We're all out to get one another. And there's really no need for that. There's no need to hate people who are different than you or don't like the same things as you or don't do things the same way as you. That's the beauty of the world that we live in. And honestly, that's the beauty of just...
Why would we like anything that makes us all the exact same? That's a really weird, scary society black mirror episode that I don't want to experience. So when it comes to that, just appreciate your differences. This episode is brought to you by Shopify. Whether you're selling a little or a lot.
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My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big ROAS man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend.
My friend's still laughing me to this day. Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do. Get $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com slash results to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com slash results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn, the place to be, to be. I'm going to tie that into the next thing that we need to appreciate, and that is ourselves. And that comes down to knowing your worth and knowing your value and knowing
Knowing that you deserve really good things and making sure that you keep your standards high for yourself. I don't think this is something I did. I said that I did and I... No, let me figure this out. I've always had high standards and that's why I don't find myself in relationships often, if ever, until now. But you need to value yourself enough that you are not going to...
Alter yourself for someone just so that they like you and I've said this a lot about friendships and temporary people but 110% more important when it comes to a relationship You cannot allow yourself to get into a relationship with someone if you aren't truly being yourself because I don't think that will feel good I don't think that will end well. I don't think that you deserve that and
You just need to simply be patient and you need to be the best version of yourself that you can be and you need to be confident in who you are and you need to appreciate all of your insecurities and all of the things that make you different and all of the things that you used to hate about yourself. You need to learn to love them.
And you start doing that by just appreciating the fact that you are here, that you exist, that your uniqueness is your superpower, that there is no one like you. And when you shift that mindset from realizing, oh, there's no one like me, I'm never going to be good enough, to there's no one like me. I have endless potential. I can do anything. I can be anything. I am the only one that can do that because I am the only me.
A whole lot changes in your life. And again, that's not to say you're not going to be insecure. You're not going to wake up and feel really ugly some days. I do. Often. But I just kind of got to sit there and tell myself, well, this is part of that me thing. You know? Like, this is part of my superpower, I guess. And I don't know. You just got to love yourself through the ups and downs and everything along the way. Like, you just got to...
Stop trying to change to fit a certain something and just start appreciating what it is that you have and where it came from. If you have your mom's nose, appreciate the fact that that came from generations and generations and generations from long, long, long ago. You know what I'm saying? Picking up what I'm putting down. Just love yourself enough to know your worth and love yourself to know that
You deserve someone who's going to treat you right and who's going to take care of you and make you feel loved and make you feel safe. And all of a sudden, I've been in a relationship for what? Almost two months and I'm ready to do a whole relationship advice podcast episode. Lexi, chill out. I'm not all there yet. But I'm definitely in my simp era. I'm in my lover girl era. And I don't know what to do about it. It's weird as heck. But it's been really fun. And it's given me... I've had to learn a lot. Genuinely. I...
I'm really good with my routine. I love the way that I do things. I am very, very, very independent in the sense that I like to go to bed and read my book and journal and make TikToks, which sounds silly, but it's an important aspect of my life. You know, I like to do things alone, go places alone. And for a while in my life, I didn't really have to think about anyone else's feelings or schedules when I would plan things or book things besides, you
Maybe my family, maybe Lisette, but I had a lot more freedom. And I don't mean that in a bad way, but I mean it in a good way. Now I have a boyfriend and I have to think about his plans and his schedule and his feelings. And emotionally, I get to have another person be a part of my life. And I don't think that I ever would have been ready for that if I didn't have control over my own emotions and my own life. And I think that God finally...
told me I was ready for a relationship because I finally figured out all the pieces of my own life, if that makes sense. And it's really cool. And I'm still getting used to it, but I'm learning to enjoy spending time or adding another person into my routine and into my life. And I've kind of learned that it can be seamless, which I never thought it really could. And I'll deep dive more into this in
Probably a month or so on an episode. Let me just let let me not talk too soon. But so far so good. You guys are still keeping my secret, which I love you for. But I'm having really fun. I'm having a really fun time with the soft launch. And that's a blast. But point here is I got a little off track. What a shocker.
The point here is to love yourself and to love your life. And if you are at a point in your life where you're hating it or where everything just feels wrong or you're really negative or you're struggling with whatever it may be because we're all struggling with something, what can you appreciate out of your situation? How can you just simply start being grateful? That's the only place you have to start. It will change your life 110%. I promise you.
Like write a list in your notes or on the journal or say it out loud. What do you have going on that you get to appreciate? Get to, not have to, you know? There's a difference there. I'm going to kind of leave this episode right here because I don't want it to be super long. You get the point. And when I talk too much, I keep saying the same thing over and over again. But just appreciate this life and know that we are all blessed to be here and that we have a roof over our heads. And...
People in our lives that love us and we have good relationships and good friendships and yada yada yada. We have everything that we could possibly need and that's how you need to start viewing the world because the more you appreciate what you have, honestly...
I believe, personally, the more God or the universe or whoever it is you may believe in is going to provide for you because you are showing him that you are happy and grateful and content. You're not sitting there asking him, oh, where's this? I wanted that last week. Or where's this? I asked for that last year. He's going to be a little ticked off. I'd be a little petty. I'd be a little passive aggressive too if someone was just complaining all the time when I'm trying to create this beautiful life for them at my own pace, you know? So take it all in.
And enjoy every second of it because we don't have as much time on this earth as we maybe thought we did, which is a scary thing to think about. But it goes by fast. Take it all in. Enjoy the roller coaster that it is and have fun with it. Okay? I love you. Have the best week ever. I will talk to you soon. Bye.