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Hello, my beautiful people. Welcome back to the Moments Podcast. I'm your host, Lexi Hidalgo, and I wanted to do a pretty real, raw headspace update on today's episode. The world is very fake.
In the sense that everything we see is what we're curated to see. Even some of the people that you follow that show you the ins and outs of their mind and all the raw moments and all their vulnerable feelings, those moments, and I find this to be something very important to remind people because I find myself falling into this trap of consuming sometimes, even people's worst moments that they show you are still moments that they've curated to show you.
They are still in a place good enough in their headspace to pull out their phone, set up their camera, and talk about what they're feeling. And it doesn't make their experience any less difficult, any less hard. But I just want us as viewers, or anybody as a consumer, because I've posted many videos in my darkest moments as well, but I still had to be in a light enough moment to set up my phone and take a video. Do you know what I mean? And...
I think it's important for all of us to just know that that is curated and that your moments of low might not look exactly like that person's moments of low. And there's this weird thing that I do sometimes to myself where I will see, you know, people be vulnerable and people be raw and people be honest about their difficulties on the internet and compare myself.
My lows to their lows, sometimes, very subconsciously. It's not something that I do by choice. And I'm like, wow, they don't feel good and they can still go do this, this, this, and that. You know, this person's having a bad day, but on their bad day, they still studied and read a book and, you know, made a healthy, fulfilling dinner and went for a walk and went to the gym or whatever it is that that person did. And it's really easy for us to get so in our heads about things
Every single thing that we watch and every single thing that we consume. And I've just found myself falling so much into that loop myself. And I think it gets very confusing as somebody who also creates content, who also wants to always keep it real and be raw and authentic and genuine in every chapter of my life. But also even this episode that I'm posting, even me talking through this podcast every single week,
is about as real and raw and in my thoughts as I can possibly get. But I still have to be in a certain headspace to sit here and be able to do that.
Even on our bus days. Even on any days. I just wanted to give you a quick little reminder that what you see on the internet is curated. And I never want your life to be so consumed by what you watch or your life to morph or change because of what somebody else seemingly is doing every single day. I want you to build out a life that works for you.
And the reason that I'm feeling this so heavily is because that's what I'm experiencing a lot of in my own life right now. And it's something that I'm trying to navigate and I'm trying to figure out. And the moral of this episode, the point of this episode is just to kind of tell you that it's a little bit okay, not a little bit okay. It's okay to be a little bit lost, a little bit confused, a little bit stuck, a little bit just wondering who you are. There's so many different things that we consume.
opportunities that we can pursue, people that we can be, that it can sometimes feel exhausting and you can kind of feel paralyzed by trying to figure out who it is that you want to be. And I've been deep in the mindset of just feeling kind of lost like that. You spend so long in your life trying to figure out exactly who you are or who you want to be or what you want to do when you grow up.
And then in the blink of an eye, you're kind of like a grown up and you still don't necessarily know if you're doing what you want to be doing or if you are doing what you're meant to be doing or you're following God's plan for you or you're doing things just to please other people. Whatever it may be, everybody's situation is completely different. But so many of us face this similar feeling where we just kind of feel stuck in our own heads and we question everything. And I think the reason that we question everything is just because of
How much we consume and how many options we're fed. And how many different lives we have to watch. And I know that I've talked about this before, maybe not in a recent episode, but at some point along this journey. And it's kind of like a deep thought that I'm going to try to make not so deep. But I think it used to be easier for people to maybe figure out what they wanted to do or be more accepting of what they chose to do. Because...
They didn't view as much. They didn't have access to see as many things. And there's a TED talk I watched one time called Paralysis of Choice or something along those lines, where when we're given too many options, it is quite literally impossible, impossible to choose one. So when we constantly consume...
Now, at this day and age where we have TikTok, we have Instagram, we're all addicted to our phones. We are all addicted to media in some way, shape, or form. Whether that be podcasts, whether that be YouTube videos, TikTok, Instagram Reels. I applaud anybody who doesn't utilize those things, but I know that a lot of people do. I know that I do. I know that it's something that I'm trying to limit myself from consuming because I know and I've witnessed what it can do to our minds. But
When we constantly can watch something like that, and in one scroll, we can follow somebody who does, who's in medical school, who is vlogging her day studying and going to class and getting a coffee and then studying again and going to class again and doing this loop.
right? And you're like, wow, that's really inspiring. Look at this girl like working so hard and chasing her dreams and wanting to be a doctor. Like, ah, maybe I want to be a doctor. And maybe this is just a feeling that we experience because we just haven't found enough confidence in ourselves. We haven't found enough individuality, but I don't really think or believe that it's that. I think it's just people who want to do everything and be everyone and sometimes feel like
constantly behind because they can't do everything and be everybody and it almost makes them feel like they can't do anything. Maybe that's niche, but it can't possibly be niche because nothing that one person feels, another person doesn't feel out there somewhere. You are never alone. I'm not alone. You're not alone. We're all in this together. But I think that you consume that video, right? And then you scroll. And it's somebody who just moved to Hawaii and
and got a job at a sunrise shack and is making acai bowls and then going to the beach and learning to surf. And then one more scroll, it's somebody who is just having a baby, just got pregnant, just had a wedding and got married and now they're expecting. Or somebody who just moved into their first house. Or somebody who moved across the country. Or somebody who just started college. Or somebody who's a style icon living in New York City. Every scroll...
We watch somebody else's life and we get brought right into their timeline. And with too much consumption of that, you kind of forget that you're existing in your own timeline. You forget to be appreciative of, you know, what you do have. And I think that a constant scroll paralyzes us from actually feeling gratitude. Now, I'm taking you so deep in my thoughts right now because...
One, this idea just hasn't left my mind. And I've noticed within myself that this is a feeling that repeats itself in my mind every once in a while. You know, maybe it's not once a month, maybe it's not tied to my hormones, but it's a loop that I always come back to. And I can openly talk about it because it's a loop that I know fades. When I first used to feel this feeling, it would make me feel almost embarrassed. I'm like, wow, do I hate my life? Like, is that why when I watch other people, I feel this weird...
Not even envy, but this desire to be literally every single one of those people. I would feel embarrassed by it because what do you mean I can't find gratitude in my own life that is so beautiful, that is such a genuine gift from God? And instead I just wish that I had something like this. And I would never voice that. I would never really feel okay saying that because I was just confused at why I felt it. And then that feeling would kind of fade away.
And then it would come back and then it would fade away and then it would come back and it's now found itself to be a cycle in my life. And I'm in one of those phases right now where today I just, and yesterday, the last couple of days, honestly, I noticed that I start to feel this way when I get too sucked in instead of like dumping myself everywhere. By that I mean, the more that you consume,
good things or not, the more you will feel that what you have is not efficient or not sufficient. That's the word I'm looking for. And it doesn't always align completely like that. There can be times where I'm really working hard at pursuing my outside life and being appreciative and chasing all of these incredible things and still feel a little bit of that internal feeling. So I don't know what it's tied to, but I can confidently talk about it now because I know that it passes. And because I've experienced this cycle so many times, there's like
things that I've learned and ways that I've found myself getting out of it. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't work, and I want to kind of just share those with you. I wanted to just talk you through my emotions because I know for sure that there are a lot of people at this age, at any age really, that struggle with this kind of experience where you
You just feel a little bit lost and you have to, you ask yourself, like, did I make the right decisions? Am I meant to be here? Am I supposed to be doing this? And if I am, what do I do next? Like you kind of just feel stuck and lost and you have a hard time setting goals because you don't know what you want to pursue or you have too many things going on, but at the same time, not enough going on. It's just this weird feeling of exhaustion.
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I want to give you a few little reminders that I use to get myself through these moments. Number one, and this has been probably the biggest one for me lately. And I think that this is what has genuinely helped me feel better from the inside out is just having faith. I've talked about faith. I did an episode a little bit on it last week, but going beyond my faith and
Whether that is something that is for you or not, I will never pressure anybody to believe a certain thing. But I do want you to think about the fact that there is something, a higher power, whatever that higher power is to you, that is in control of everything. Now, if you choose not to believe in this, any kind of higher power at all, you do not have to.
But I'd like to encourage you to only because of the peace that it can help you feel. When we look at the world from a scientific standpoint, we look at the world that we are in control of everything, that we have to sustain every single thing ever. It's a very exhausting way to think and an exhausting way to feel. Now, I'm not saying your higher power has to be Jesus. But for me, the moment that I found Jesus and trusted Jesus was
and learned that, hey, Jesus has this control over my life, and God is the one moving me around like I'm a little piece on a game board, it makes you feel a lot less pressure to constantly do, to constantly be, to constantly chase these things of the world. These things that the world makes us believe are everything. Money, success, popularity, beauty. Once you...
know and learn that those things don't matter, they have much less of a hold on you. And I think I used to get very anxious about those kinds of things, and I think I still, deep down somewhere, do. And that's why these feelings still show up, even though I've learned how to process and handle them, because I am human, because I exist in the world, these feelings are still going to pop up because they're so constantly pushed and portrayed to us. Correct? But once you learn
that those things don't matter at all, you feel a different kind of peace. It helps a lot of your anxiety, a lot of your overthinking, a lot of your doubt, a lot of your questioning. Not constantly, not every time, but eventually, yeah, and it's beautiful. So I think that learning to just grow your faith and have faith that somebody else is in control of everything can help you escape this feeling. That being said, I think that
For me, having that faith helps with the physical feelings of anxiety or the constant overthinking. But there's still parts of me that feel disappointed in myself that I don't know what next steps to take or I don't know what my goals are. I don't know exactly what my passion is. Right? I still feel like I'm not doing enough because I want to work with that higher power that's guiding me. I want to work with God. I want God to guide me and I want to be able to work alongside him instead of just
Let him just do all of the work and just wait around for life to happen because I don't think that's what it's about either So what i've learned to do? Is look for signs Look for signs. I think that when i'm in these lower state of minds, I don't know if I Use that terminology, right? But when i'm feeling A little bit more sad per se I let that be my sign from god that He wants me to be more aware. He wants me to look around and
connect deeper to him or connect deeper to getting to know myself and figuring out what is the next step? Where do I go? Instead of just waiting for somebody to hand you a piece of paper that says this is what you do next. Sometimes you have to slow down and we're forced to slow down. We don't get to choose that. We're forced to slow down because we're meant to really look around, to look at the grass, to feel the breeze, to look at the clouds, to
Take a deep breath. When we get so stuck in the go, go, go, we don't appreciate anything. We don't have any awareness. So maybe that's what you're meant to do in those moments that you feel this way, if you feel this way. Sometimes I'm talking and I'm being deep, not deep, but I'm just getting super in my head about what I'm saying.
And just wondering if somebody's out there listening, being like, oh my gosh, this girl's crazy. What is she like? Nobody cares, you know? And then I remind myself, who cares if anybody thinks that these are experiences, but it is a weird thing that I've been going through lately again, where I almost feel like it's my first time getting on the internet, um,
I don't know what got into me, but I've been more nervous to talk about things openly and be more vulnerable, which is weird because if you guys have been here, if anybody's been here for a while, I haven't faced that issue in a very long time. So it's something that I'm working through. I don't know if I just got it in my head that like people perceive me. There was like a bunch of stuff that went down on TikTok that just...
led people who didn't know anything about me to be talking about me and that puts a really weird almost fog on my mind and on my almost my lens of the world because once you remember that people perceive you and not everybody's gonna like you it's kind of hard so I'm shaking that off and I'm remembering that you can't be everybody's even it wait what's the expression
You can be the sweetest peach on the tree. Not everybody likes peaches and that's the beauty of life. You can't be liked by everybody, but it's weird how it has done that to my mind and we will get back to normal soon.
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And I'm going to I'm going to move on. I'm going to move on from what I was saying. I want to give you a couple more tools for anybody who is experiencing this, because even if it is niche, somebody else out there is experiencing the same thing. And my only goal in this lifetime is to.
Help somebody else feel better. Whatever they're going through, whatever you're experiencing, we're in this boat together. And this is the beauty of this podcast is to grow together, to experience life together, to learn with one another and to just be there for each other. It's a beautiful, incredible, incredible thing. The next thing that you're going to do is I say this every single week in probably every single episode. Put the phone down. Put the phone down this morning.
As I've been trying to work through all these emotions and things that I've been feeling, I read my Bible, I journaled in my book, I read the book that I'm reading, and then I picked up my phone. Dumb idea. And for about only 10 minutes, maybe, I started scrolling. And let me tell you, after I finished reading my book and my journal and my Bible, I felt on top of the world. I felt like a new person. I felt my mind felt clear. I was ready to take on the day to just put my best foot forward.
Then you pick up the phone for no matter how short of a time. When your brain is at a point where it is sensitive to things, it's the worst thing that you can do. You have to use your judgment. I don't think that consuming is a bad thing. I think consuming when your mind is sensitive is a bad thing. And it can just completely tarnish the progress that you've made or...
make you feel like you've started over or take you right back into that negative headspace, whatever that may be for you, because every one of us has a different situation, of course. But I highly recommend that you put the phone down. And that's what I'm challenging myself to do this week is to put the phone down. I'm also challenging myself to wake up early. And a lot of these things were things we talked about in my New Year's resolutions episode. I'm sure that you can all assume how long those lasted for me.
Because if you know me, you know things don't go so well around here. But granted, it was a crazy month. I traveled. I got very sick. So getting a little bit back on track. But...
I'm waking up early. I think that anybody who's listening to this, anybody in the world should wake up early. It's the best thing you could do ever. I know that there's people who are night owls and as somebody who used to be a former night owl and swore by being a night owl, being a morning person is way cooler. I feel that you live so many more days. You experience so much more daylight and it's just the best thing that you can do. And I,
I know that a lot of people have to be up early for class, for work, whatever it may be. But for anybody who doesn't necessarily have to be up early, whether you create your own work schedule, you work later in the afternoons, you have class later in the afternoons, force yourself, challenge yourself to get up early because it's the best thing that you can do. I encourage you to do that. And that might sound like a silly thing, but it makes a world of a difference when your mind is not at its highest point.
Next thing is just kind of allow yourself to feel like this. Don't just sit and sulk and sadness and in darkness. That's not really what I mean. I don't really think that's beneficial. And there might be points in my life where I have pushed out a recommended feel your feelings. I'm still pushing that but differently now. I think it's important to continue working towards feeling better.
while simultaneously accepting how you feel, if that makes sense. So don't sulk and sit and be like, oh, I'm sad today. Let me just be sad and rot away and just like let the day fade away. No, let me do what I can. Let me give myself grace along the way. Let me remind myself that it's okay if I don't execute it all perfectly and let me accept what I'm feeling, but still work towards feeling better. I hope that made sense. I don't know. Go for a walk, cook a nice meal,
Get your journal out. Put your phone down. Maybe work out. Maybe go on the sauna. Maybe do a little self-care. Get yourself a treat. Maybe organize something that's been sitting around being a disaster. Another thing that I think is very important that I kind of just had a light bulb moment about for my own personal self as I was recording this is that nothing will change if you don't change something. The quote goes a little something like this, "'Nothing changes if nothing changes.'"
I know that makes it pretty clear, but one more time just in case you didn't hear me. Nothing changes if nothing changes. If you want to feel better, if you want to feel different, if you want to feel happier and more joyful, you cannot keep sitting around experiencing the same routine over and over and over again. Add something new in. Replace something. Switch something out. Make an effort to feel better if you want to feel better. That's not saying it's going to happen overnight.
But nothing will change if you do not change something. So change something. Start somewhere small. Change the way you're talking to yourself in your mind. Change the way you're getting ready in the morning. Change the routine of brushing your teeth versus making your bed. Switch them. Try things and see what makes you feel good. But don't just sit around and wait for your headspace to change when you haven't done anything to change your headspace. You get what I mean? That's what I need to do.
That's what you need to do. That's what we all need to do. And if you're listening to this, you're actually at a really good point in your mind. I applaud you. I'm proud of you. I love you. If you're a little bit lost in whatever that may be, that's also okay. I'm still proud of you. You're still beautiful. You're still wonderful. You're still doing amazing things and becoming an amazing person. This is part of the journey. This is all part of God's plan. And we need to remember that.
But I love you guys. I wanted to just give you a little bite-size dive into my brain because I have been feeling a little bit lost, a little bit just confused, and it's just been kind of one of those weeks, and I'm working on shifting that around, and I've already been feeling better, but just thought it's important to keep it real and let you know that, remind you, that everything you watch and listen to and see is curated to some extent. So...
Take everything that you consume with a grain of salt. Know that you wouldn't be here if you weren't meant to be here. Recognize that gratitude can't live at the same time as like envy and jealousy. Maybe they can slightly, but let's pretend that they can't. Prioritize gratitude instead of envy. Prioritize appreciating all of the little moments in your life and not comparing them to somebody else's little moments in their life. This is your life.
It is a gift, and I can promise you that. I love you so much. I'll talk to you guys soon. Hope you have the most beautiful day ever.
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