15 lessons I learned the first six months of 2023
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Hello, my beautiful friends, and welcome back to the Claim Your Power podcast, the ultimate show for all things spirituality, self-love, and personal development. I'm your host, Kim Peretz. I'm a two-time author, content creator, yoga teacher, and entrepreneur. You are at the right place if you're ready to tap into your gifts, unleash your potential, and become your higher self. It's time to claim your power.

Hey my friends and welcome back to the Claim Your Power podcast. If you're new here, my name is Kim Peretz and I am your host and I'm happy that you're joining me in today's episode. So I want to give you guys a little background of why I decided to film this episode because it was kind of all very synchronous. So the other night it was the full moon in Sagittarius and me and one of my best friends

We were sitting outside on our balcony and we were doing tarot readings and oracle decks and journaling and we were like gazing at the moon and basically just having like a spiritual girls night.

And I was doing an Oracle deck reading and I was using a deck that my sister bought me for my birthday. And the card that popped out was a card all about a year ago today and where you were a year ago. And it kind of had a message about how we should both reflect on where we were a year ago and how far we've come and use that time to reflect to see where we're supposed to go and where our path is leading us.

So we were both kind of like weirded out by that card because usually that card like has never popped out for me. It's a new deck. I'm not used to those types of messages. And so we both looked at our camera rolls on where we were a year ago. And a year ago today, we both had a new deck.

had moved countries and we both had like completely had this like different chapter. Like we both on that day had like a very big shift in our life when it came to a chapter in our life. I won't go too much into detail on those specifics just because I

Some things I like to keep to myself about my own life. But we both were reflecting on that, on how on that day, exactly a year ago, there was a big shift in our life. It wasn't just like a normal day of like me going to the gym. Like those days for both of us, like she was at the airport and I had like a very big shift in my life that day.

Anyways, so we were both reflecting on that and we were just thinking how crazy is that exactly a year ago we were in a completely different chapter in our life, a completely different period and we were also completely different people.

And so that led me to wanting to film an episode on all the lessons that I have learned in this past year. And not just that, I was also thinking that it is exactly six months almost since the beginning of 2023. By the time this video and podcast will be out, it's going to be a little over six months, but it has been half a year of 2023. And I was just thinking that even at the beginning of 2023, I was a completely different person

And I have changed so much and evolved so much and have grown and just changed my identity as a person. And I'm just a new version of myself. And I was thinking on all the lessons that I learned. So I wrote everything down in my journal. And today I'm going to tell you guys all the lessons that I have learned this past six months and also in the past year that have really empowered me and changed my life and

and I think will also change yours. So I've got a lot of them written down. So some of them I'm going to go through and just say them and others I'm going to expand on my thoughts on them. First one, don't take advice from people that you don't genuinely want to be like. Let me explain.

Don't take relationship advice from people who aren't like in a healthy, amazing relationship that you look up to. Or don't take career advice from people that you don't look at them and think, wow, I want to be in that place in my career. I look up to them. So the people that you ask for advice from, make sure that those are people that you genuinely look up to, that you in a way are like, wow, this person empowers me. They inspire me. So I want their advice.

And do not take advice from people that are lower than where you want to be or that do not inspire you. Don't just take advice and ask everyone for advice on your own life. That's the thing that I learned is like, don't constantly ask people for input on your personal life unless you genuinely think they have some wisdom to share.

And that leads me to also this idea is don't take criticism from people that you wouldn't take advice from. Do you know how many times I've been criticized? Like even the other day was so weird. I was out with some of my friends and there was this guy there that I guess came with one of my friends and he had like a very alpha man wounded masculinity mentality.

And he was talking to me. He was talking to me like about TikTok and my podcast. And it was so weird because the whole conversation, I just felt like he needed to be like this person.

bigger person in the conversation and he was like minimizing everything that I do and he was saying these weird comments of like oh your podcast is definitely just for women like I don't think you have any advice for men and just like all this weird insecure like wounded masculine things that like the right amazing men in my life would never say to me they only empower me and support me but it was just such a weird strange conversation and it made me laugh because I was like maybe

maybe a year ago today I would have gone insecure about it and I was like oh this person's judging me da da da and now I'm just like I would never want to take advice from this man nor do I look up to this man in any way and he's just projecting his insecurity onto me so why should I care and so I kind of just was laughing the whole conversation because it just made me laugh how much when you do

self work and you are aware of how people react and of human behavior, you realize that 99% of the time people are projecting their own insecurities onto you. And I had like such a big awareness of that during the conversation. And it was just so interesting to see that

a man who is the opposite of like a masculine amazing man who's someone who's like on the disguise of like this alpha man but really he's really wounded and insecure and you know his self-esteem is low because he's apparently threatened or intimidated by me

And so it was just like a weird conversation to say the least. And the reason I'm telling you guys this is do not take criticism from people that you wouldn't take advice from. Because me a year ago would have been so butthurt over the fact that he was like judging me for like making content and having a podcast.

And now I just think to myself, I'm like, who even is this man? I met him five minutes ago. He doesn't know anything about me. He doesn't know how much my show has helped so many people. He doesn't know who I am at my core. And he's just out here judging me. And it's just funny. Like, it's honestly funny because I'm like, wow, how insecure can you be?

And so moral of the story, do not take criticism from people that you do not want to take advice from. Number two, less is more and quality over quantity. And this is not just like in your relationships, in your friendships. This is like in everything. You do not have to have like all of your schedule filled out with like every single little like activity that you're going to do. And take it from me because I'm someone who operates

and her masculine energy a lot. Like when I'm creating, when I'm working, when I'm doing the podcast, the content, like I have to be like organized, responsible, da da da. But take it from me to make time for yourself to have self-care in your schedule and to not have every single, you know, commitment up on the air for you. You do not have to say yes to every single thing in your life. In fact, less is more.

Because then when you do say yes, you actually mean it. You're not just saying yes because you feel obligated to say yes. You say yes because you genuinely want to do that thing. You genuinely want to have that experience. You genuinely want to go and get coffee with that person. So less is more in quality over quantity. Choose your experiences for the quality of them, not for the quantity of them. You do not need to constantly be around people that...

are not supporting your growth. It is so much better to just take that time for yourself and to spend some doing self-care and taking care of you than constantly saying yes and yes and yes when you do not actually mean it. Number three, the more that you will evolve, the more that your life will begin to change drastically. Let me tell you that my life a year ago today is un-

recognizable. I look back at just photos of myself and where I was a year ago and I just do not recognize that and also if you look back at a past version of yourself and you find yourself like cringing or getting goosebumps, that's actually a good thing. It means that you really have evolved that you do not have any resonance with a past version of yourself that had less wisdom and less experience and so

Realize that the more that you evolve and the more that you grow and pour into yourself, the more that your life will begin to change. And when you're able to embrace that change with open arms and see it as a good sign that people walk in and out of your life, opportunities shift for you, new doors are opening, different doors are closing, and you see that all that change is happening because you have evolved, you have grown, you will attain the greatest sense of peace. Number four, if it's out of your control in your physical reality, it deserves freedom from your mind too.

Easier said than done. But let me tell you that if there's a situation or an experience that is out of your control in your life, that there's nothing you can do about it anymore, you should try to attempt to make peace with that in your mind so that your mind doesn't drive you crazy. Because

Trust me that no moment exists other than this exact moment right now of you listening to my podcast or watching this video on YouTube. Like there is no other moment. The past and the future only exist inside your mind and inside your head. So when you realize this, you will just become so much freer and so much happier because you will not allow yourself and your mind to entertain things that are out of your control.

It's not easy to have this type of mentality and nobody's perfect at it. Like we're all human and our minds go a little wackadoodle. So sometimes we have moments where we need to like overthink and overanalyze. Like that's normal. But if you adopt this mentality in your head of like, okay, you catch yourself during that overthinking thought and you ask yourself, is there anything right now consciously that I can do about it? And if your answer is yes, go out and take that action. And if your answer is no, that thought and that worry and anxiety

anxiety deserves freedom from your mind too. And try to redirect your focus and shift your energy towards another place, towards what you do want to feel, towards what you do want to experience. And also taking a moment to remind yourself that things always work out for you, even if they don't seem like it in the moment. And look back at every single time in your life when you thought that everything wasn't going to work out and it was the worst thing in the world. And look at where you are now. It did work out. And so asking yourself that question is

What if it works out better than I could have imagined? And reminding yourself that, that it's going to work out and that the universe has your back, you will just become so much more free and so much happier because you will stop putting all your energy on things that are out of your control. Lesson number five, every single time that you chase something, it's going to run. People, things, everything.

experiences, especially people, let's focus this on people right now, especially like romantic partners. Every single time that you chase after something and you're in this desperate energy of like, I need you, I need to have you, I'm chasing you, I'm desperate, that thing is going to run the fuck away from you.

It's just, you're going to repulse it so far to the other side of the earth. Because when you're in this chasing energy, you lack a self-value. You lack your sense of self-worth and self-respect. Because you feel the need to chase something and to prove yourself. Maybe it's subconscious. But every single time that you chase after somebody, you are disrespecting yourself. And I'm not saying that you shouldn't express interest in anyone or do any work or just be kind or da-da-da-da.

But when you're in this constant energy of like trying to prove yourself to people, trying to get somebody else to see your value and choose you, all that tells me is that you just have not chosen yourself.

So when in doubt, choose yourself because every single time that you're gonna chase after that thing, it's gonna run away from you. And have you noticed that every single time you're in this place of unattachment and just neutrality and you just focus on your happiness and being present, that thing just naturally gravitate towards you because you're not blocking it off because your energy is open and not desperate. Lesson number six, you don't constantly need to be on your healing journey because you are not broken. I think that there is such a big...

misconception in a lot of the self-development and spiritual community that we constantly need to be healing and we constantly need to be uncovering our wounds and our traumas and our shadows and da da da and like there's no end like it's a rabbit hole that you will never get out of and I'm not saying you should abandon doing inner work at all but sometimes you need to enjoy what you have already accomplished for yourself and be proud of yourself for how far you have come

Life is about the journey, not the destination. And you are constantly going to be evolving and discovering new things about yourself and unraveling layers of you.

And when you're constantly just keep telling yourself this narrative of like, I can't have that thing. I can't be happy until this and this till I heal every single little wound that I have. You're never going to get out of that because you're always going to be discovering new things that you need to work on, new things that you want to improve or grow or evolve. And that's normal. And so being able to take a moment and just enjoy how far you have come and be proud of yourself that you are not the same person that you were a month ago, a year ago, five years ago, and just be

proud of that and how far you have gone already, you will just be so happy and you will be able to enjoy life for what it is, not what it should be. Lesson number seven, match people's energy and invest in people that invest in you. Stop investing all of your time and all of your energy into people who do not deserve it.

Not every single person in your life deserves to get the most loyal, amazing, always there type of version of you. Some people, you need to match their energy. If they're showing up to you 100%, you show up with that same energy. But if you've got a person in your life who's half and half,

who's there for you some days, isn't there for you other days, you don't need to be the most loyal person to them in your life because you're just matching their energy. Invest in the people that invest in you and stop investing your energy and time into people who don't give a fuck about you. Like, I'm just gonna be honest because there are so many of you guys that I know that listen to me that are very empathic and are very much a people pleaser and so stop doing it because I used to be a people pleaser and it made me miserable, miserable. So you need to stop doing things

things for other people that do not deserve it and stop saying yes to people who do not deserve it. Start saying no and being a little selfish with your energy because when you're doing that, you're respecting yourself and you're respecting your boundaries and you're being embraced in your own self-value and self-love. This leads me to lesson number eight, which is never will you ever regret investing in yourself. If you are ever in doubt in life, you should just choose yourself.

Because you will never regret putting yourself first and investing in you, but you will have moments where you will regret investing in people that don't invest back into you. So when you are in doubt, just choose yourself, put yourself up on the pedestal, and be a little bit selfish with your energy because that energy, when you're putting it on you, you know it's going to come back to you. You know that investment is valid. Lesson number nine, you are not the same person that you were a year ago.

And let me give you guys a little background to this. When I was doing the self-reflection on me a year ago, I felt like moments where I felt so small. Like it was like all these emotions were coming back to me because I was reflecting on certain situations that I went through a year ago. And I just felt all these experiences and all these emotions and all these thoughts coming up.

And then I took a moment and wow, I actually have goosebumps right now. But then I took a moment and I remembered and I told myself, wait, Kim, you are not the same person that you were a year ago. You're not going to have those experiences anymore because you have such a bigger sense of awareness and you have so much more wisdom and experiences than you did a year ago.

And so you are not who you were when you were going through that experience and when you were experiencing those situations. You're a different person now, so you're gonna know how to respond to it from a higher place because you love yourself and you respect yourself and you have grown and evolved. So this is just your reminder that when you find yourself looking back at past versions of you,

And how you responded to things, how you reacted, the things that you allowed into your life and all of that and you find yourself even guilt tripping or shaming yourself, just remember that you have to go through those things. Like there are no mistakes. There are only lessons. You have to learn those things. You have to become that version of you so that you can be who you are today.

And so have grace for that past version of you and remind yourself that you are not them anymore. You are not that past version of you that didn't know any better, that lacked that sense of wisdom and lacked that experience. You're a new person now. You're different. You have grown. You have evolved. And be proud of yourself for being who you are today because you have to walk that path of being that past version of you to become who you are now. Lesson number 10, energy is your currency and you have to start viewing your relationships as investments.

So if you were to go to the bank and you were going to ask them to, you know, take a loan and get all this money, but then you told them, wait, I'm going to take all your money. I'm going to take a loan to pay off my college debts or to buy a house, but I'm not giving you back any of the money. Like I'm just taking the loan and I'm not giving you anything back. The bank would look at you and they would be like, bitch, no, like you're not getting a loan because we need that money back. You need to sign that agreement.

And you wouldn't get the loan and you wouldn't get the money. And that same thing, that same mentality and that same energy needs to go back to your friendships and your relationships in life. If you are giving all your energy and all your time and all your love and all your compassions and to people that are not giving you that same type of investment back, you

You should not be investing your time into them or your energy or your love or anything. Energy is your currency. When you give your energy to someone, when you give your love and your compassion to someone, it's because they have deserved it. They have earned it. And that same goes for you. Like you need to honor the fact that the people in your life that love and honor you are giving you that same energy and are showing up with the love and compassion in your life.

Assess with yourself who in your life is showing up with the utmost grace and love and empathy and is loyal and is always there. And put those people up on top on your priority list. Those are the people in your life that you should be prioritizing and putting your time and energy on. And anybody else should be on the back burner.

Because when you give your energy to people who are not giving it back to you, all you're doing is depleting yourself and making yourself miserable. Lesson number 11, start talking to God or the universe or source or whatever entity you want to call it. But start having those conversations with the universe and God. And when you are in doubt, when you need guidance, ask for it.

Ask for a sign. Literally close your eyes, sit in meditation and ask for a sign. Ask for the universe to show you the path. Ask for God to light the way for things to align for you, for the path of least resistance to be shown to you. Ask for signs because when you ask, you will receive. You always receive. Whenever I've asked for signs from the universe, I receive them like right away because I started opening myself to seeing them. Like,

You are always guided. You are always supported. But sometimes we are so caught up in this human experience that we forget that we can tap into that guidance. You are never alone. Ever, ever. The universe has your back. But we also have free will as humans. So if you want to go through life, miserable life,

stressed, resistance, and just disconnected from everything, you're going to have that experience. But if you want to go through life with love and ease and your connection to source and God and the universe, then you start having that dialogue and you start asking for guidance and you start inviting people

spirit and your angels and everything to guide the way for you and to be there with you when times are tough and to show you the way and to light you the path. When you start doing that, you will also start seeing the universe responding to that vibration. Lesson number 12, you do not need to explain yourself to people committed to misunderstanding you.

That's it. I don't even need to expand on it. You just don't need to explain yourself to the people who are not open-minded and who are not open to understanding you. If you feel that type of energy from someone, that they are not open, that they are a little judgmental or critical, you don't need to explain yourself to them. Just move on, let it go, and pour your energy into a better place. Lesson number 13, your goals, your habits, and your self-respect are

has to be stronger than your feelings in life. You're not going to have moments that you're always going to be happy. Like you're going to have days where you're not going to feel motivated, where you're not going to feel like you want to, you know, accomplish that goal or do that habit or, you

Honor your feelings and your boundaries. You're gonna have days where you're gonna feel low. That's part of life. But your self-respect and your connection and purpose to who you wanna become has to be stronger than your feelings in that present moment. Sometimes feelings confuse us because they come and go. But you are not your emotions. You are the one experiencing them.

So when you remind yourself who you want to become, your goals, your habits, your dreams, your manifestations, and you do not abandon those things for anyone. You will also remember that on days where you feel off and not so good, it's okay to rest, it's okay to honor yourself, but you never abandon yourself or your self-respect for anybody else or anything else just because you just feel like it in that exact moment. Your self-respect has to be stronger than your feelings. And an emotionally strong person is that

powerful person because you will not be able to easily be manipulated or changed out of your own life and out of your own self-love and habits. When a woman or a man, but you guys know that I mainly talk to you women out there because that's where, that's who I am and that's the wisdom that I have to share with you. When someone is powerful in their emotions and knows how to emotionally react from a place of intelligence and maturity, they are not in a place to be manipulated and controlled.

When you are not connected to your emotions, when you lack that self-respect, you can be easily manipulated, gaslit, and controlled by other people in your life. So develop emotional connection to yourself, emotional intelligence, and emotional maturity by understanding who you are at your core because that is

the greatest thing that will ever serve you in life. Lesson number 14, you don't need to voice to everyone that you have high standards. You need to just naturally uphold those high standards from your actions. Like it doesn't help you being like, yeah, my standards are so high. Like I have such high standards from my friends and from men and to constantly voice that out into the world. But then when somebody crosses your boundary, you let them do it over and over again.

Or you're not able to walk away from people that don't support your growth or from relationships that you know aren't right for you. Or when you see a red flag, you just pretend that it's like pink and you're like, I don't see that fucking red flag. Yeah, you see it. Yeah, you see it. And so this is my advice for you. You do not voice your standards. You uphold them through your actions and through what you allow access to and what you allow into your life.

That is when people start to respect you and actually understand what your standards are when you're able to uphold them. When you're just voicing them and telling everyone I have high standards, nobody's actually going to respect those standards because you don't actually embody them. You just all talk but no action. And this is our last lesson, lesson number 15. When you are able to say goodbye to something in your life that no longer serves you or to a person or a relationship that you know is no longer right for you,

Life will reward you with a new hello. These are all the lessons I've got. I hope that you guys like this episode and these types of episode because I have so much more that I can share about this and I can definitely make a part two if you guys want. And I just want to remind you guys that if you guys are into journaling and guided gratitude practice, I have created my own claim your power journal and I want you guys all to get it so we can all journal together. I'm going to leave the link to get it in the episode notes.

And I hope you guys get it. And if you do, if you do buy the journal and you start journaling with it, please send me a DM of you using it because I would love to see you writing with it. Send me a photo. It would make me so, so happy. And yes, without further ado, thank you for joining me in today's episode. I love you. I am proud of you. I'm grateful for you. And I can't wait to talk to you next time. Beautiful souls, thank you so much for joining me in today's episode.

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