Reflections - The Truth About The Nature of Sex and Gender
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This is Smart People Podcast. A podcast for smart people, where we talk to smart people, but not necessarily done by smart people. Hey, welcome to Smart People Podcast Reflections episode. Sorry we missed the last one. A lot going on here.

in smart people podcast land. But I wasn't going to miss this one because if you listen to the episode with Dr. Nathan Lentz, you will notice that I claim and I stick by this claim. It's one of our top episodes of all time. So in this episode, I will be reflecting on why I think that is the case.

So before we get into the reflections episode, I want to mention something. We've been toying with the structure of these as they are new episodes. And what I've been doing up until now is three different sections kind of about the guest, about the topic, and then the takeaways.

What I've decided to do is unless there is something that stands out that I think is important about either the guest or the subject, we're going to jump straight into the takeaways. Now, in this case, there is something I want to mention upfront, and then we get into these real incredible takeaways, which is this is a story I didn't mention in the episode. There was a first on this episode for the first time in 15 years.

I conducted an entire one hour interview with Nathan and forgot to hit record. I didn't record it. In the intro of me talking to him, I was so curious and ready to jump in that I guess I forgot to hit the button. So we talked for an hour and had an excellent conversation only to get to the end and realize it wasn't captured. And I have to tell you, I was distraught.

I went down to my wife. I said, you're not going to believe what just happened. And I recounted the story to her. And for the next few hours, I recognized the emotion I was feeling most was sadness. And the sadness was this. I grew from this conversation. I benefited. I was entertained. I felt connected.

And I wanted the same for you, you listening. Like I genuinely did. And I realized I was never going to get the chance to give that to you. So I reached out to Nathan and I had to admit what had happened. It's extremely embarrassing. And Nathan simply said, don't beat yourself up. These things happen. Let's do it again.

And in truth, I didn't know if I was going to be able to do it again. There's a type of magic that is captured in the initial conversations, that initial curiosity that I don't know if I can or could recreate. Never done it before, but I knew I had to give it a shot. And so the very next day, Nathan gave me another hour of his time and was just as, if not even more gracious the second time around and focused and focused.

willing to not only do it again, but to try to do it better. And so I just want to say, I think that's the type of person he is. Okay. Now let's get into what were my takeaways? What are some key reflection moments? Now, listen, if you listen to the episode,

You know it was a journey. It covered everything from clownfish reproduction to bird monogamy to the difference between the word sex and the word gender and what it means. So it was a tough one to reflect on. But I'm going to tell you, in order of my importance, what stuck out to me.

The very first and perhaps the all-encompassing takeaway for me was this idea of diversity and the impact diversity has had and will have on our ability to survive and prosper as a species. Now, Nathan used this beautiful phrase, diversity is our insurance policy against an unpredictable future.

And the thing is, all of us know about the benefits of genetic diversity. I mean, it's Darwinism, right? It's the idea that we have diverse heights and diverse skin colors and diverse strengths and weaknesses. And there's a lot of diversity and it's beneficial. There's biodiversity. There's diversity in plants and animals. And it's a great thing. It makes our world our world.

So now let's apply this idea of the benefits of diversity to gender and sexuality. Why all of a sudden, when we get to that point, are we far less tolerant as a species? Why are these things taboo for us? I mean, just as there are many different shades of human, why can't we revel in the fact that there is many shades of sexual attraction?

Why do we create these binaries in certain areas, but then allow for the entire rich tapestry in others? So this idea...

The benefit of diversity, which I know personally I've always taken to heart, especially as a leadership expert. We talk about having diversity on your team strengthens your abilities. But I hadn't applied the same logic to things like what gender you identify as or who you choose to be with sexually. Which brings me to my second point. Why not?

Why haven't I? As somebody who is tolerant of all these things, I can't say I've applauded it, if you will, mostly because I just didn't understand it. But also because if you take a crude logic to gender and sexuality, which I did in this episode at times, it was to say, but look, don't we need to have male and female?

And isn't it fair to say that natural would be male and female, not for any biblical sense. Okay. I'm not going to give you that, but from a reproductive standpoint, if a logical explanation of any species is to thrive and procreate and be as abundant as possible, then

Wouldn't it make sense that in order to get there, we need to optimize for the conditions that allow procreation, such as man, woman, sperm and egg, babies, you know how that works. So the reproduction argument. And that's when Nathan fundamentally changed a view that either consciously or subconsciously I may have had a bias I may have had in a logical fallacy where he said, listen,

Not every member of a species needs to be reproductively capable in order to be valuable. It's not about an individual's ability to procreate. It is about the species' resilience. And what leads to resilience? You got it. Diversity.

He talked about bees, which I happen to keep bees. The only bee in a hive of thousands that can procreate is the queen. And she doesn't even procreate with bees in her hive. She actually goes on a mating flight. Then almost all of the rest of the hive is in support of both the queen and the

the babies. They are not having sex. However, that system works. And so if you say the goal of a species is to procreate, however that species accomplishes it, if it does it successfully, means that it is natural and right. But what it does not have to be is that every individual has the ability of procreation.

Another example he uses was clownfish, which they can actually change their sex. They start off male and if they live long enough, they'll switch to female and they do it based on a complex understanding of their environment and how many members of the species their environment can support. So in this case, simply being able to reproduce at times is actually a negative because there are too many of them.

So there goes that argument of why it should be man and woman and binary, or at least that that's the only logical explanation. So points one and two, I think, go together really well to help us recognize flawed thinking.

My third point, which goes a little bit along the lines of the diversity component, is the fact that humans are the ultimate generalists. One of the most adaptable, if not the most adaptable, multicellular or complex creature on the planet.

We can thrive in almost every environment. So for example, polar bears are built for the Arctic or certain desert reptiles thrive in the heat. But humans, we can live practically anywhere, build, construct what we need. We have spread all over the globe, which speaks to our flexibility and adaptability. And then we do what we need to survive. And now let me bring points one and two together to bring point three home.

Humans, as far as we know, are the only living creature able to intentionally shape our environment, bend it to our will, question our existence, and truly make meaning. We are, as we talk about, the apex species. And we did it because of our adaptability, because of our diversity, not because of our sheer numbers.

As Nathan talks about, if it was all about reproduction, we would probably just leverage asexual reproduction. It's easier, cheaper, more efficient. The challenge is when you do that or when a species does that, they are not cross pollinating their genes. So therefore they're not creating the diversity. So it all kind of flows together. One, applying this idea of diversity to sex and gender.

Two, removing the fallacy that sex and gender's primary role is to procreate. And then three, recognizing the thing we are potentially best at, which is adaptability. The thing that is one of our secret sauces to global domination, if you will, comes from points one and two. Now, the fourth and final is really what Nathan's book is predicated on, which is the idea of natural.

And I do think this was his primary intent in writing this book, which was, listen, and he says this. He says, if you want to enforce social controls on someone's gender expression,

and you want to do it under the guise of calling it natural. Let's make sure we are basing that argument in what is actually natural versus what we wish to perceive as natural. We tell a story about how bias impacts us, about birds. For the longest time, birds were held up as the bastion of monogamy, not because they are monogamous.

But because if that is what you want to believe, as the scientists did, then the way that is researched will often support those beliefs. And so a lot of things that we talk about as natural when it relates to sexuality and gender, we are choosing to cherry pick the parts of nature that support that while dismissing the majority of elements that would say otherwise.

As we talk about in the interview and probably the interview that didn't make it to air, there are lions who choose same-sex relationships. There are sex-changing fish. There are so many examples of diversity in sex and gender in nature, but we try not to think about those. We try not to notice them because that would ruin our narrative that absolutely

that our binary of these things is actually a man-made construct and antithetical to our nature. In short, perhaps one of nature's best gifts is its diversity in all areas. And so let's use that as a starting point to discuss how we want to shape human civilization.

And that is my reflection of my conversation with Dr. Nathan Lentz on his new book, The Sexual Evolution, How 500 Million Years of Sex, Gender, and Mating Shape Modern Relationships.

I hope you enjoyed. If you do, do me a favor, shoot me a note, smartpeoplepodcast at gmail.com. Curious if these episodes are enjoyable or helpful to you. There are a lot of time and work on top of the other things. So look, if you're not getting value, don't need to do them. Just enjoy it and hope you do too. Also, tell a friend, send it to them, all the good stuff. Thanks for listening to Smart People Podcast.

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