Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Welcome to Chasing Life podcast, where we talk about fitness, running, career, and life tips to inspire you to live your best life. I'm your host, Sarah Kane, and I hope you enjoy today's episode. Welcome to another episode of Chasing Life. I'm your host, Sarah, and today's guest is Rose O'Neill. Rose is an optimistic, happy-go-lucky, long-distance runner, and below-the-knee amputee who never gives up. She does not believe in taking the easy path or carrying around emotional baggage from others, despite enduring an abusive relationship.
As a mother of two and grandmother to one, she believes that life is worth living. So enjoy yourself, love deeply, and smile widely. Today our conversation covers Rose's journey from an abusive relationship to her spirit and lessons that she's learned as a result of being an amputee.
Now, this is a content warning that we do briefly discuss her abusive relationship. So if that is a trigger for you, please be cautious of listening to this episode. You can follow more of Rose's journey at runroserun11 on Instagram. I hope you enjoy this conversation.
Hi, Rose. Thank you for joining me today. Hi. I wanted to have you on because you have such a positive Instagram feed. That's how we found each other. And so I was just wondering if you could kind of just start off by sharing your running and fitness journey and like who you are. So wherever you want to get started with that. Running saved my life in all honesty. When I started, I was overweight. So I wasn't running. I was walking.
And I was told, you can't do it. You're too fat. What are you even trying for? And I just kept going and going and going. And eventually I was like, well, I can do this a little more. And then I started jogging and then I started running and I was running crazy distances. I would run
between towns. So I would run from Tumbler Ridge to Dawson Creek, which was over 100 kilometers. It got my body and my mind so physically and mentally strong that it gave me the strength to know that I was worth more than I was being treated and to stand up on my own two feet and say, you know, enough of this. I'm not deserving the treatment.
I don't need to be pushed around. I don't, I'm better than this and I'm leaving. And so I left and I took my kids. Unfortunately, my ex-husband didn't like that idea. And he decided that if he couldn't have me, nobody would. And that is when he found me when I was running, he hit me with his work pickup truck.
Oh my gosh. He tried to kill me. So that's kind of what started my whole journey because he left me for dead when he hit me. I was 50 kilometers out and I was thrown down an embankment from the force of the hit. If I wasn't in the shape that I was in, it would have killed me. The only thing that really saved me was that I was at that point, I was so muscular from running that
is what saved me. But then I was rushed into surgery and ended up with a prosthetic leg. That kind of threw me for a bit of a loop. I was told that I would never walk again by the doctors. There was such trauma when I had my emergency surgery that they just said, there's no hope. And that's really the wrong thing to say to me because
You just don't tell me there's no hope. And I just said, well, you're, you know, you're wrong. I am going to run again. So I spent 11 months in the hospital learning to rewalk and I did walk not very well, mind you, but I did, you know, and I could be angry over it, but at the end of the day, that anger I'd be carrying around is going to hurt me. And I,
I don't deserve to carry that around. It's not mine to carry around. That guilt and anger is not for me. You know, I make a choice every morning to be happy and it makes my life easier. You know, life is difficult as it is. I have permanent nerve damage. Some days I wonder how I'm still standing because the pain is so severe, but I'm still grateful.
I'm grateful I didn't lose more of my leg. I'm grateful I didn't lose my life. But, you know, I think we have to realize that you're greater than your circumstances. You know, if we thank our bodies instead of breaking ourselves down, you know, stay present within yourself fully and just be aware of how grateful you should be.
for the things in your life, instead of complaining about what you think you don't have. I mean, you have mobility. I mean, the gift of mobility is huge. I've just spent almost a month not being able to walk on my leg, but I'm still out there. I'm still, I'm out there wheeling in my wheelchair. I'm out there, you know, trying to get kilometers on my crutches.
You know, I'm not saying that I'm better than anyone else, but I'm just saying I'm not quitting just because I'm not able to walk, which really is a bummer because I do like to get out there. But there's other ways to look at things, right? Optimism through pain. I'm kind of a bit of a clown. So I was organizing wheelchair races around the nursing station and the prize was my daily dessert. So did you always win the dessert? Yeah.
No, no, I cheated. I let go when I didn't like the desserts.
You know, it's good to get people moving, right? That was one thing I could do, you know, at least try and bring them a little bit of laughter. When you're dealing with pain and stuff, you do have to have that optimism. You know, you have those pivotal moments in life where you make choices. And, you know, when I lost my leg, I had to look through that silver lining. You know, I spent a day in mourning.
I gave myself a day. I said, okay, you know, I'm going to have my pity party for one day and then that's it. And then I'm going to move on. So I allowed myself one day to grieve for my leg. And that was it because I knew I had to grieve, but I wasn't going to get stuck in that grieving because I had things to do. I had to start getting ready to run because that was my goal. And that's always been my goal.
you know, even though they said, you know, you're not going to walk. I'm like, well, I have to learn how to run. I am
on the verge of learning how to run again. And through the power of positivity, things come to you, good things come to you. You know, it may take time, like other than running. Yeah, it's always a tough one for when I asked my runner. Yeah, my granddaughter, she's five years old. And I am
teaching her how to run because she wants to run her first marathon with her Grammy. I set up GoFundMe for my running blade because they're so expensive. And I found out yesterday that there is a doctor in the States, the University of Delaware, that is gifting me
my prosthetic running blade. Oh my God, that's amazing. I am so overwhelmed. And it's just because he heard my story and that I've started talking about the things that I went through. I was not expecting that.
All I was doing and talking about this stuff for was because I want abused women to know that there is hope. There is hope out there. It doesn't matter what happens. You can get out. You can succeed. You can be so much better. You are better than the circumstances you are in. And you are not what people tell you you are.
You may be getting called down by your partner or, you know, worse things happening, but someone's opinion of you does not have to be your reality. At some point, you have to forgive those who didn't know how to love you. They were actually teaching you how to love yourself. I just got chills with that. Yeah.
That's very true. That's something that those who are struggling in a relationship that isn't treating them right, that should be reminded of. I found fitness and running at a time where I didn't feel loved by others. So as a result, I found a way to love my body more and that turned into more confidence and love in myself. So at a lower level compared to your experiences, but I
I couldn't have said it better myself. I mean, it doesn't mean that I'll ever forget, but it doesn't mean that I can't forgive. And that's very powerful to share as well. It's not easy. Some days are easier than others. I don't consider myself disabled. People consider me disabled.
So that's a completely different thing, right? People think I can't do anything because I'm missing my lower leg, but that's a bad assumption on their part. Their opinion of me doesn't affect my opinion of myself.
Right now I'm trying to bring awareness to abuse. I've been posting like crazy about my story of abuse. My abuse was pretty horrific and my abuse led to me ending up having my amputation. You talk about it, you
bring it out into the open as difficult as it is, because you never know when you're going to be able to help that one person or maybe give that one person, man or woman, that strength to leave a bad situation. There needs to be dialogue and there needs to be positivity around it. So there's the disability, there's the women that have been abused. There's all these things that I'm trying to bring kind of enlightenment to and just talk about it because people need to
be open on these subjects and it can't be taboo anymore. I found my voice. And of course, I'm not going to shut up now. It's up to you to make your dreams a reality. Other people can't do it for us. We can't allow other people's limited perceptions to alter what we want to do with our dreams. Like our dreams are our dreams and they give us a reason to band ourselves and to keep trying and just to keep that motivation going. Can you tell us
what one of your current dreams are my current dream is is to run again when I get my blade and but I will get it within two months it's going to be to run which it has been since day one it is just something that I need to do I live breathe you know like it just it's my life I got my kids I
is my life and it's just something that I have to do. It's more than a need. And I know when I get my blade, I will be relearning to run because that's a whole different skill set with a prosthetic. So I can foresee myself needing some bubble wrap for my face. Cause I'll probably be landing on it an awful lot, but I'm going to be doing the big kilometers as soon as I can. I know it'll take time. I'm determined. Oh,
I love hearing that determination and the positivity. There are going to be hard days ahead, I'm sure. Oh, yes. But having that goal in your mind will just be that positive reinforcement of thinking, I'm taking a step closer today. I'm working towards that ultimate goal. It's been too long that I have been unable to run. I've
steadily maintained my mobility throughout everything. And I've struggled to move on a daily basis. I'm just not a quitter. I don't give up. I think an important thing too, is I just keep my eyes on the end goal. I am just so hungry for my running and to get out in the mountains and that's it. That's what I'm going to do.
And I have such good support. I have such a good support system. My family, my friends, there's no doubts. I mean, they all think I'm still crazy. They support me and they know I'm going to do it one way or another. Sometimes it's good to be stubborn. Absolutely. And driven. I get driven is a more positive word, right? Yes. I like that. You're going to have to tell my mother that. Yeah.
Did you enjoy trail running when you were able to run? You mentioned the mountains. Can you tell us about one of your favorite trails that you've run? It's actually in Tumbler Ridge and it's actually a course. It was the Emperor's Challenge half marathon course. And that is my all time favorite. It's up one side of a mountain down the other. It is amazing.
stunning difficult very difficult to do but it is absolutely stunning can have seven different seasons up there it's just crazy the weather you have to carry winter gloves with you and too i mean it's a
you can get snow and it can be boiling hot down at the bottom but it's an absolutely stunning stunning course you go up into the alpine and see the the birds and all the scrub brush and all the different vegetation and it's just breathtaking it reminds you of
just being so small and you just appreciate just being alive. You just feel so alive up there. That is probably going to be always my favorite run just because
That is also the very first mountain marathon that I ran. And so that's always going to hold a very special part in my heart. You know, like that's just, it's just a stunning, stunning trail. More like a goat trail, but it's there. But it's beautiful. So that's my go-to. I think that one first marathon,
of a kind of first mountain marathon, as you mentioned, or a first half marathon, first marathon, whatever those first big races are for people, I think always hold a special place because it challenges you in a new way or it made you chase a new goal
And then being in the mountains is an even greater experience because you get to see these views that maybe you wouldn't have seen otherwise. Or you think that's one of the greatest things about running is you get to explore the world around you and have an excuse to go outside and run on trails that maybe you wouldn't have been exposed to if you didn't sign up for a race.
I love to ask my guests a couple of questions. What's something that you are loving or currently obsessed with right now? And so she's actually walked a five kilometer race with me and she got a medal for it. That's so sweet. I think I have a little runner in my midst, which just thrills me to no end.
Neither of my kids run. So that's very sweet when, when kids have an interest in something you're so passionate about, because then you can share it with them and pass it on to them and do it with them. Yeah, no, it definitely is. I'm pretty excited about that. And, and for her too, you know, it's a very good confidence builder as you grow.
Absolutely.
with disabled athletes and do it in such a way so that the disabled athletes, depending on their level of disability, are able to finish the course with an able-bodied athlete helping them. It'll be a race, but not, you know, you've got first, you've got second. It'll be that they've actually finished because they're
A lot of times with disabilities, it's hard to just get moving, right? There's a lot of pain involved. So it's not going to be a standardized race. But I want to start trying to blend two kind of separate cultures, so to speak, with the disabled and the able-bodied and try and pair people up and go, okay, look, they're not going to bite. Nobody's going to bite. Come on, let's get together. Let's work together and fight.
try and kind of buddy people up and see if we can't do something that way. So that's kind of one of my goals I've been working on. That sounds really cool. How did you come up with that? But you know what, I can give you an honest answer. And it's not a silly question. Because I
In all honesty, like I said, people look at me, they see my leg and they automatically think I've had a damn lobotomy. People treat me like I'm an idiot. Like most people do. Not everyone, but the majority of people, as soon as they see that you have a visual disability, that's it. You're written off for them. And it is a sad truth. What they don't realize is like, I'm like thankful that,
And this is where I count my gratitude in because I am grateful. I don't have to waste my time on those people. They've already written themselves off for me, you know, but I mean, it is so sad that I people that treat me like I don't know a thing so sad. And that's why I actually thought of it. So that's not a silly question at all. I mean, that is my reality of how
a lot of people treat me. And you know, I'm underestimated. That's their mistake to make. But that is why I thought of that. Because a lot of people get underestimated. And there's so much people can learn from other people, if you give them the chance. And I think that's what I'm trying to do is allow that openness of learning. It's not so much about
racing it's more about just fellowship of man you know like think people with respect you know build a bond and that type of thing so it's a community yeah you know I want to strengthen those community ties because we need it
in this day and age. Absolutely. And even more so in this, the last year, I think it's become evident just how much we do better as a society when we have those community connections and everybody's been so secluded, you know, as humans, we thrive on a community. And so I think it's pretty amazing of you to want to address the culture that is preventing people from seeing differently abled people as people
Just people. So I applaud you for that. Thank you. You know, but I mean, if I'm going to be brutally honest, if I had two legs, I wouldn't have thought of it. Not that I wouldn't have helped somebody in need. That thought process just wouldn't have hit me in the same way. And I probably would not have found my voice there.
in such a loud way either. But now there's so much clarity for me since I've lost my leg. And it's like, you know what? I've already lost the leg. There's not much else that can go much worse than that. I feel like people will appreciate that honesty. You know, and I was grateful for my ability to run and do all those distances, but I never appreciated my mobility in the way that I appreciate it now. Yeah.
I mean, I love being able to go those distances and it just was amazing. But now it's like, oh, wow, I can actually walk like this is such a great thing. It's interesting whether a runner has to take some time off doing an injury surgery, going through an
an experience like you didn't move, whatever it is that they have time away from running when they come back to it. I feel like there's a greater appreciation for it and you just view it in a whole different way. It's one thing to take some time away from running by choosing it, but when it's taken away from you without your choice and you just crave it so much. And then when you can do it again,
It's like you won a gold medal. No, it's true. You see other people running and you get jealous. I think it's hard not to. It's like, oh, you got to stop running because I can't. One last question to wrap up our episode is what does chasing life mean to you? You know, that's a really good question. Chasing life is just never allowing life to make you forget why you're hungry for your goals in the first place. You hit that wall and your level of commitment is tested. Yeah.
You just keep pushing. You never forget why you're climbing that mountain, why you're pushing against that hill. You just keep going and going and going because eventually you will get to that other side. That's chasing dreams, chasing life. That's everything to me. You just never give up. I think that's just my motto.
Yeah, thank you for sharing that. I love that answer. Thank you for having the courage to share your story. I'm really looking forward to following your journey as you get your blade and then learning how to run again and then chasing those goals. Thank you for allowing me to have the time to talk about it too. Thank you for listening. If you enjoyed today's episode, please share on social media. Tag me at SarahChasingLife or at Chasing Life Podcast.
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