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I'm a good lawyer, and I want to win. I'm a savage. I think I killed JT.
She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronalde. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop.
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Mic check, one, two, one, two. The realest is back. What did you gonna do? Guess what, y'all? Welcome to season three of Carefully Reckless. This the third time I done spun the bend three times on they ass, y'all. I'm happy to be back. Listen, let's clap it up for me. Clap it up, clap it up, clap it up, because this would not be a podcast without y'all.
And I'm super excited to jump straight in this season. We're going to be fixing mess just like we was last season. And my apologies, y'all. I told y'all that I would not be taking a break in between seasons, that I was just going to go straight into it. And the last episode of the last season would be immediately followed by the first episode in the third season. But I had some things that I had to do. I'm doing way more TV than I ever been doing before. I got a lot of new projects coming out.
on different networks, streaming networks, cable. I'm doing movies that are going to be in theaters, still touring full-time, still being a mom as full-time as I can. And listen, it's been a journey, but I'm glad that you guys are patient and you guys are willing to go through it with me.
So we're going to jump straight in, y'all. This very first story that we're about to jump into, I gave her advice before. I don't know if you guys remember her, but she was in a relationship with a guy. Everything was good. It was perfect. Now, they're young. I do believe, if I can remember, they're a young couple in their early 20s.
And she had a problem with drinking and he didn't like that. She would drink Casamigos or, you know, tequila until the point where she would black out and they would get into arguments and stuff like that. And she went through his phone and caught him talking to somebody. Nothing had ever happened. He never, like,
She never found any proof that he actually slept with someone or met up with them, but he had started conversating with somebody in his past or whatever. I guess just seeking the attention that she had stopped giving him due to her alcoholism or whatever, but she is back with an update. So let's listen to what she got to say.
Hi, Jess. I just really need you to fix my mess again. I had messaged you earlier about a bitch being on off of the Casamigos like a couple of months ago. And then I went through my man's phone, saw some things I didn't want to see. We're about 10 months later, but long story short, we ended up breaking up. He ended up moving out. I ended up being a motherfucking bodybuilder, helping him move his motherfucking couches out. Where was his friends at?
So now I was without couches. I was without a bedroom dresser. But whatever. He ended up moving out. It is what it is. We stopped talking for a little bit. And we ended up meeting up a few months later. So we ended up breaking up in about August.
And we started talking again in about November, like right before Thanksgiving. And we met up at like one of the places we just like to go to and we went and talked. Long story short, we just started talking and I just noticed our communication is getting actively better. We do live in separate places now. I sometimes spend the night at his place. He spends the night at my place. And I am 23. He is 25.
So I do feel like it's healthy that we had this period only because we'd only known each other for two months before he initially moved in. But now we're getting to the point where we were together for two years, living together for two years, but...
He moved out and I would genuinely say 100% we're getting better. But how long am I supposed to wait to ask to be his girlfriend again? Like I keep applying pressure, applying pressure. It's not about giving ultimatums. It's more just about come on out.
Like, the same thing I tell him. Why do I feel like I'm auditioning to be your girlfriend? And, you know, sometimes I feel like Instagram gets into my head. But it is that if he wanted to, he would. So if we broke up in August, we started talking again in November, and now it's April. And we have, we lived together two years. We're hitting year three of knowing each other. We're doing just random things like snow tubing. We're talking about planning vacations.
Here's the thing. End of the day, he's talking about me being, meeting his mom again just for his birthday. He wants her to come down here to Lake Tahoe
He's like, oh yeah, I already told her you were going to be there because it's not that me and his mom have problems, but you know, when you break up with her baby, then obviously you're going to have problems. So everything is going so good. We're talking so much healthier. It's not about screaming or yelling at each other. Granted, I still have hiccups off the Casamigos. So here's the thing. This man sees my soul in a way that I can't describe. And...
I'm a very dominant, aggressive person, but when I'm around him, I just want him to understand that I just want him and I want to be around him. And it just makes me emotional because first I wasn't able to describe how much I felt for him, but like this man...
is my whole heart. And it's kind of just dumb to tell people that someone's your whole heart when you guys have already been together and it didn't work out and now you're trying to make it work and now you're in a situation ship.
but you explain to them how it's getting better but they don't understand it and it's not for them to understand and that's the thing you tell people what you want to tell them but at the end of the day you can't describe how this person makes you feel and I can definitely say how we are right now is a hundred percent better than how we were during our honeymoon phase like of like the first six months of knowing each other six months to a year I just see
Such potential in what we could be together. And I still feel like he's stuck on old stuff or...
I don't really know what he's stuck on or what he's afraid of. But the reason that I called or just sent this tonight was because I had finally told him how I felt. I've been keeping like stuff bottled up. You know, I had a little bit of wine. No Casamigos, no Casamigos. But I did have some wine tonight with my girl. We're about to go on our cruise in three days to Mexico. So I just told him how I feel.
He just came back from Dallas. I'm about to go to Mexico. So I just told him flat out, like, sometimes I get nervous when he goes other places because we don't have any rules of established commitment. And I want that. I want you to be loyal to me and I want to be loyal to you. We were together for two years. You live with me for two years.
We might have broke up for a little bit, but in general, you know who I am. You know we have a good time together, but it's not just a good time. It's just we just... When people say, like, it's just something that you can't explain, that's how I really feel about him.
And it's definitely not perfect. I'm not perfect and he's not perfect. And I'm not saying we don't have hiccups. But if you find someone that you want to really rock with or really deal with, then I think you decide you want to work it out. And I feel like I figured it out. And it's hard to tell someone that you figured it out, but you don't want to hit them with the ultimatum. But then you see shit on Instagram like, oh, but if he wanted to, he will.
And I get that if he wanted to, it will. But if you also did things in the past that makes him question why he should, then I can't just be like, what are you waiting for? Because if I were perfect, there would literally be no reason. There's nothing wrong with weighing out pros and cons, but it's just the fact that
I don't know, Jess. I guess what I am asking is, everyone has pros and cons to their spouse, but what do you think are the key factors or elements that are needed to
To make a relationship last consistently and long term. That is ultimately my question. Just a couple of things, just a little bit of advice. Like what is how do you know it's long term or what do you do to make it long term? Just anything would help.
Thank you so much. But as always, Jess, you are one of my favorite podcasts to listen to. So I just wanted to send you an audio. I would just love some advice because I love this man. And I know this man loves me. But when you come from families that never showed you how to, how do you love on someone? How do you choose to be vulnerable with someone? How do you open up
with someone in your most vulnerable moments? And how do you work through, like, already pent-up residual shit, you know? I'm sorry. I know I'm hitting you with a lot of questions. It's just, I'm not necessarily asking you all this. It's just, man, I love this man, so...
Please, just give me something. Help me, please. Oh, and just to give you a little bit more background, we live on the West Coast. Neither of us have kids. And obviously, we have two separate households and two different cars.
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Hey girl, so you checked back in with me and I love that. First of all, it's nothing wrong with you venting. Stop apologizing for asking me so many questions. Stop it. If I didn't want to fix your mess, I wouldn't be doing this. You know, if I felt like this was too much or if one person's story was going to involve too many different complex questions,
I wouldn't even be doing this right now. Sometimes you just need to vent and you need to vent to somebody that you don't know and who don't know you and who wouldn't be biased because I'm not ever going to be biased. I am a woman and I stand with women. However, sometimes we're wrong and sometimes men are wrong, you know, so I stand with who is right. But I give perspectives, two perspectives on each situation, you know.
And I'm here to help people open up their minds, you know, so you don't look at a situation one particular way. You don't be too closed minded, you know, to see what your problem is or to see how you could be making this person react. Now, let's get to the part with the audition part. You said you feel like you are auditioning to be his girlfriend again.
because you guys were together, but some damage was done. You guys needed to separate and then revisit. You guys are in a good space right now, but you're kind of back and forth. I can tell that you love him, yes. And I can tell that you also know that you messed up too, okay? But the key in that is, okay,
You know that you messed up. You owned it. You apologized. That's all you can do. Do not keep beating a dead horse. And what I mean is beating on yourself. Don't keep beating yourself up about what happened in the past. Because y'all two have done somewhat of a reconciliation. You know, y'all, it seems like you guys are getting back or trying to navigate back to that good place that you guys once wanted.
We're in, but it's like a wall built up on his side. I don't know the severity of detriment behind what you did to him, but apparently it's taking him a little bit more time than you would like to get back together with you. Are you also communicating? Like what you asked me for the tools.
to actually make something long-term? How do you keep it together? How do you get that longevity in a relationship that has gone through problems? The tool is honesty, communication, and time.
time. You got to give another person time just because you're over what you did and you're over seeing somebody that he talked to on the phone doesn't mean that he can get over it as quickly as you did. You know what I'm saying? Because we as females can look at it like, damn, you act like I cheated on you. I didn't cheat on you. You know, so all I had was a little alcohol, you know, was a little drinking problem, but you don't know how traumatic that was for him. You don't know his trauma behind that.
He could have grown up with a drunk in his family that he saw abuse his cousins or, you know, not saying that's the case, but that could be the case. Now, this is your boyfriend, your ex-boyfriend, soon to be boyfriend again if that happens. So you know him way more than I know him. You know him well. But I know people. I know what I've been through. I know certain situations. You know, I know how people work in certain situations depending on
the situation, you know, and even in my last relationship,
We will argue. And I can get over things quicker. I would be over it, like, you know, in a few hours. It would take him a few days to have to process and internalize and look at it from this microscope over here in the corner. And then you have to go, girl. And at times that shit gets annoying as fuck. I'm just going to say. Some people are slower than others. And I don't mean that coming at anybody's intelligence or whatever. I'm not talking about your mental capacity. No, I'm not. I'm talking about transitioning. Like...
You can't transition out of an argument until you fully processed it and all that shit.
That shit is annoying when you are with someone who don't really hold grudges, who can't stay in one fucking miserable space for too long. Like, no, let's get past this shit. Let's talk about this shit. Let's get over it. I don't want to let anything linger. I don't want to go to sleep angry, motherfucker. That's what you want to do. And I know it sounds like that I'm going back in time. That's why that nigga is my ex. I cannot deal with somebody who takes...
Too fucking long. Yep, the Baltimore 2. Do not take too fucking long getting over this shit. Because by the time you get over it in a few days or weeks, I'm already on something else. And I don't mean on another guy. I'm talking about, listen, I'm on some other shit. I'm on some other shit. I cannot dwell and be grudgy about some shit with a man that I plan to spend the rest of my life with.
You know what I'm saying? But we also, that's also us putting expectations on people, putting standards on people and trusting them to handle situations like we would handle them. Everybody's different, you know, and it's different strokes for different folks.
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I'm not going to stop. I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate the power of attorney. Always bet on Jags. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu.
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I think you should give him just a little bit more time. You know, it hasn't been ages since y'all broke up, you know. I think that you need to communicate with him that you have changed, you know, if you haven't already. And I think that you need to solidify some type of boundary. I think, like you said, you can just make it as a conversation. Hey, I know we haven't solidified anything yet,
official that would deem us official again. We haven't established any type of commitment as to
Are we going to just try this exclusively together? Are we dating other people while we're trying to be back together? Because that, you know, that doesn't work. Everybody in their right mind knows that shit don't work. You know, I think that needs to be a conversation. Maybe after your cruise, before your cruise. You just sent this to me, so I think you may already be back from your cruise. You sent this last week. Okay, so you might even be back from your cruise. I think you should sit down and talk to him about it. See how he is. Is he nonchalant with you? Does he give you...
Vibes like, I'ma fuck with you just because you was my ex and I'm comfortable with you. Do you think that you actually really think he sees a future with you? Get inside of his mind if you know how to do that. And you should be able to know how to do it because you ain't drunk.
You said you didn't went to wine and that's great. You know, and you're young, you're young, you're young. Okay. A lot of us have gone through things dealing with alcohol and shit. You know, I'm in my thirties girl. I'm 31. And I'm telling you, I don't want to look at another fucking bottle of Casamigos. Okay. I did that shit all through my twenties. Tequila and cognac and vodka and all that shit. Girl, I'm so sick of fucking liquor.
So communication, communicate with him, sit down and talk to him, check back in with me. Cause I really think that you also shouldn't swallow yourself up in trying to be with him
either. You're early in age, boo. You're 25 or 23. I don't remember which one you said was 25 or 23. You were him, but it's so many other things that you could be focusing on. I know you love him. I know you love him. Love him enough to let him go and see if his ass find his way back. Love his ass like that. Love his ass from a distance. He'll be fine and you will too, okay? Check back in with me. Let me know.
I think that was a pretty good one. Her story took up a lot of time, so we'll be back next week with a second episode of Season 3. Y'all clap it up one more time. Clap it up, clap it up, clap it up. I love you guys. I also want you to know, again,
You can send in voice notes. A lot of y'all are sending me essays, PDFs, and fucking, oh my God, speeches. And y'all not proofreading what y'all sending before y'all send it. So a lot of y'all stories I can't read because I don't know y'all. So I can't make up pieces to y'all puzzle if y'all not really...
taking y'all time and reading through what y'all want me to read, you know? And then also, if I tried to read this shit, y'all would be like, damn, I sound crazy as a motherfucker. A lot of y'all would question yourselves on y'all literature and shit. All right?
I need for y'all to slow down. I know y'all got a lot of shit y'all want to tell me. And before I get out of here, the very first Black Effect podcast festival will be hosted by yours truly. Just hilarious, y'all. Yes! The tickets are all sold out, but
That's a good thing because this is not a one-time thing. This is going to be an annual thing. So next year, if you didn't get your tickets for this year, get your tickets for next year because we are doing this shit for years and years to come, y'all. Me and Charlamagne will be hosting. Make sure that you stay tapped in and tuned in each and every Wednesday to Carefully Reckless. And in my deepest pan, boys. Peace.
Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I'm a good lawyer and I want to win. I'm a savage. I think I killed GT.
She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop. I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate.
The power of attorney. Always bet on Jax. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu. Gear up for outdoor adventures with the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder. This midsize SUV is designed for epic journeys. Offering spacious seating for eight, available panoramic moonroof,
and an available intelligent four-wheel drive feature with seven drive modes to take your off-road experience to new heights. Discover the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder at NissanUSA.com. Intelligent all-wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Towing capacity varies by configuration. See Nissan Towing Guide and Owner's Manual for additional information. Always secure cargo.
Most deals are barely worth mentioning. But then there's AT&T's best deal on the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6 featuring FlexCam with Galaxy AI. You can get it on them when you trade in your eligible smartphone any year, any condition. It's a deal so good you'll be... Shout out!
from the rooftop. So, grab a ladder and learn how to get that new phone on AT&T. AT&T, connecting changes everything. Requires trade-in of Galaxy S, Note, or Z series smartphone. Limited time offer. 256GB for $0. Additional fees, terms, and restrictions apply. See att.com slash Samsung or visit an AT&T store for details. Music
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