Bitter Ex-Wife, Bitter Life
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Welcome to Carefully Reckless, a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect.

Oh shit, we on the air. Welcome back to yet another Catholique Reckless episode with your girl Jess Hilarious. I am alone today because Taylor is not going to read with me. I'm actually on maternity leave a little bit, a little something, something, something like that. Nah!

I can't say maternity leave because I wouldn't be doing this maternity leave mean you are off period, but I'm still working or whatever, but I'm just working remotely. So I'm back at my residence recording my podcast show. So let's get into it. These are some long ass stories. I cannot stress enough.

That y'all can send voice memos. I know y'all hate doing it, but I hate reading this shit right now. And so I have this baby, my nigga, I'm not trying to read a valedictorian speech. Like that's exactly what this is. This is crazy. And y'all know I've been getting, I've been getting good. We're reading stories for just with the mess on breakfast club. Y'all want a bitch to read whole like Bible chapters. Like this is crazy. This is crazy.

This is all so long. And I know y'all hate the way Taylor read. A couple of y'all already told me y'all hate the way she read. I get it. But she was good for the job because I didn't have to read when I was up there. So now y'all got to deal with me. And I will cut y'all out if y'all not using proper grammar. Because don't nobody want to read no fucked up shit. Shit. All right.

My man was married for 27 years. Wait a minute. First sentence is crazy. What? My man was married for 27 years.

But not to you, basically. OK, let me just let me just go. His ex was extremely controlling, insecure and disrespectful. He is very patient, kind and loving. Family friends have told me countless stories about her, how she would talk shit to him in front of people. You ain't shit. You think you to shit are just some of the examples of how she used to talk to him.

The marriage ended by her cheating on him and feeling like she wasn't in love with him anymore. So he was forced to leave. Just to interject, I mean, if you're talking to a man like that, you're walking all over him. I don't doubt that she was cheating on his ass anyway. Okay, back to it. So he was forced to leave. Okay. And then why the fuck you forced? If a bitch talking to you like that, married 27 years, I don't give a fuck if y'all was married for 27 days. Bitch, don't play with me. Because I will...

Never mind. Shit, I'm incriminating my damn self. Anyway, cut a long story short. They have been divorced since 2015. We have been happily together since 2018. Absolutely in love with each other and are really excuse me. See, they go to fucking heartburn. Yeah, I told you. That's why I don't like to read.

and are really healthy together. Okay, so y'all two are healthy. All right, this is after his divorce. We do have a 15-year age difference. All right, he is 54. I am 39. He has two grown adult kids, 32 and 28, and I have a 17 and 15-year-old. He and his ex also took guardianship of her niece and her nephew, 15 and 14 years old, who used to attend school with my youngest.

and have even been in the same class. In the beginning of our relationship, the two young kids would come over and hang out with my kids. Since she found out about us, she's been disrespectful and has talked shit about me to mutual friends and his family members.

She has instructed her two minor kids to stay away from my kids anytime they see my kids. When the little girl had her birthday party, my daughter made cupcakes and a gift. My best friend took her to drop it off. She basically told my daughter her gifts were not welcomed. She told my man we all need to stay away from her and her kids and stopped allowing him to see the kids on the weekends. Damn.

She ended up needing a babysitter and asked him to watch them. He planned to bring the kids over to my house, and I put a stop to it. I do not blame you. I called her to demand consistency. Them kids ain't coming over here. Staying one way and one way only. I have tried to meet with her and talk over coffee, but she got nobody with a motherfucking coffee. But she declined and told me she didn't trust my intentions. How do you think you're going to have after even...

The little bit that you told me about this bitch make me want to slap my head around. Why would you ever even offer a conversation over coffee? You know fucking well. You know way better than that. Yeah, she declined and she told your ass she don't trust you. That is what it is.

Since then, she has texted him messages like come back home, pictures of her throwing kisses, etc. Now she wants some petty shit. Okay. He ended up having to block her. Now she just emails him asking him to call her for different stupid shit. Can you call me to talk about our debt? I would like to visit our son who was 32 together so we can show him that we love him and can put our differences aside because he is struggling with our divorce.

I know what that's like because I'm 32 and both of my parents are divorced as well. And I struggle with it at first, just for a few months. She also said our daughter needs new tires. So these are the emails that she sent him. OK. She also said, I see you have a new family. You can't be there for our kids, but I see you're supporting your ladies kids.

Well, let's pause right there real quick, because if your best friend works with the daughter...

The information will be coming from your best friend. Like, you got to think about that. Is your best friend going to work running her mouth or are you on the phone every day with the best friend while she at work and shit like that? Like, you know what I'm saying? This is think about it. This is your best friend who works with this woman's child, your husband's child.

If she finding out shit that only your best friend know, your best friend saying shit. You get what I'm saying? So you got to be careful with your best friend or your best friend got to be careful being on the phone around. You know, I'm saying because y'all probably talk at work and all of that. And she'd be around a girl, you know, so just keep that tight. Keep that whole tight. Oh, yeah. I mean, not keep the whole tight. Sorry. Keep keep that. Keep an eye on that shit.

She also has manipulated their grown adult kids to dislike me. Hmm, that's not a surprise. So the relationship between his biological kids and I hasn't really progressed. They are good and respectful, but you can tell that they set a boundary.

He also has a grandbaby who I absolutely love. I treat her like my grandbaby. She even slips up and calls me grandma, but always gets corrected like that is not grandma, as you are not. So just don't be surprised at anything that this lady did. I mean, she's very vindictive. Of course, she's spiteful. She's bitter, you know, so it has caused me to pull back. So I don't do as much as I want to to protect my feelings. Yeah.

Hmm.

I haven't confronted her because I don't want my man to experience issues, which I feel she wants. She wants us to funk so she can be favored over the situation. I don't know what that means. That's because you married to that goddamn 54 year old man. What do you mean she wants us to funk?

so she can be favored over the situation okay i think she wants us to fight is that what you're saying or fake the funk she wants us to fake the funk so she can be favored over the situation i don't know what you mean the latest thing is after six years being divorced she put the home they bought together on the market on his birthday this year do you think these actions mean she's still in love with him and wants him back i

I try to think like a controlling woman being able to control every single thing in a marriage and home of kids to not being able to control shit. Oh, wow. Their kids are grown. He is in a new relationship and life has moved on. In my mind, I don't understand why anyone would keep pestering someone who is in a relationship. It's ugly and shameful. What are your thoughts?

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Well, my first thought is you never cut a long story short. That is not a short story to even fucking begin with. Like you lied about that. But I understand. I understand how you feel. First of all, I do want to apologize because you've been going through a lot. This baby mama slash ex-wife seems like the baby mama from hell, the spawn of Satan. And this ain't my first time.

Helping somebody with this type of mess. It's not my first time hearing about crazy baby moms, ex-wives, ex-girlfriends, you know, like this. It may be your first time dealing with it, though. I am absolutely sympathetic towards you. I do understand your situation. But I think your conversations shouldn't be with her. They should be with your husband. You clearly let me know that.

He don't even defend himself. He don't even try to put her in her place and shit like that. Maybe that's that. That would be OK if he was a single man. You know, I'm saying because he probably don't give a fuck. He knew how crazy she was when he was in a 27 year marriage where he knew it well before she cheated. He was telling me that again, you know, nothing that man was unaware of how crazy this lady was.

Way before a divorce, you can see something going downhill before it actually gets to the bottom of the hill. But he's married, so he has to have...

a certain level of concern about the well-being of his wife, your mental, how you feel. He has to take into account, he's not just living for him no more. You chose to remarry, sir. So you have to protect your wife's feelings, whether that's from your ex-wife or from whatever, like from your kids, who has obviously been, I don't want to say brainwashed, but

fed a bunch of bullshit by their mom. I don't know, I think this is something that you and your husband should talk about. I mean, I know you've made several attempts

of talking to her. You wanted to meet this lady for coffee. She told you no, because she don't trust you. Then turn around and be talking shit about you to the family and the kids. And that's why things can't move forward and progress with your stepkids and things like that. And it sounds like you're dealing with a whole lot. That's a whole world of bullshit that you have been putting up with for the sake of your marriage.

Have you ever thought about leaving at some point? Have you ever thought about, I just, I'm just asking, I'm not telling you that's what you should do. I'm not suggesting that's what you should do.

I just want to know your thoughts because a lot of women wouldn't be able to take that shit. You get what I'm saying? A lot of women will be like, yo, get a fucking backbone. Your ex-wife is a clown. Like you need to get that under control some type of fucking way. I don't know how you can do it. I don't know if you will do it, whatever. You may not pay her no mind, but it bothers me. She bothers me. She bothers my kids. She makes her kids, y'all kids bother my kids. Like by telling them not to not, you know, how the fuck you gonna reject the baby's birthday gift?

These are kids. So she's obviously just a bitter ass woman. It's ridiculous. And I'm actually hope that she listens to carefully reckless. A clown. Well, listen, if she don't, your best friend, your best friend going to tell her daughter at work. So your daughter can tell us. So she'll be able to listen. But yeah, I think I think this is deeper than just.

A bitter ex. They were married for 27 years. So they had property together. Like you said, she put the house that they own together when they were married on the market. And I'm guessing that was without his consent. You said on his birthday. Does that mean she's still in love with him? I mean, I don't know if I don't know if I'll say she's still in love with him because she cheated on him and he was forced to leave.

But I think she just know her part. That seemed like somebody who liked to have power over a situation. She likes to have things in her control. And she probably knows from being in a relationship with this man, being in a marriage with him for 27 years, he ain't going to do nothing to her. You know what I mean? Like,

He don't give a fuck. He ain't defend himself when he was with her. He ain't going to defend himself now, you know? So I think she just do what she want because she knows she can, you know what I'm saying? And bitter. Yeah, she's bitter for sure. But I guarantee you, it's probably not that she's in love with this man. Cause if you can walk all over somebody, that's not the person for you. A man has to lead you for you to be in love. Like, I feel like you have to be led at some point. She seems like a dictator.

She wore the pants in a relationship for so long and she knows she can get away with certain shit with this man. You know, you get what I mean? You get where I'm going with that? So I don't even think it's about being in love. It's just about her stressing her power and flexing like, man, I'm never going to be in trouble for this. Like, you can't stop nothing. That's probably why she don't pay you no mind, you know?

You don't respond to her. You know, she felt like she could be phony at outdoor events, you know, and then behind closed doors. She's a bitch. She has very sinister ways. But your problem starts with your man. You need to talk to your man. Look at the screen. Look at the screen. This is your man. And you're going to stick beside him.

You know what I mean? So why are you sticking beside him? You need to stick it to him and sit down and be like, yo, shit needs to change. The man, he let her walk all over him. Get some balls, get a backbone and shit. And you sit down and talk to him and be like, if you don't take charge or be the fucking man I need you to be.

You get what I'm saying? Like your family, we have children. Like now we have a family. You're in a new relationship. Yeah. You blocked and all that shit. Yeah. But come on. That's high school shit. If somebody want to get in contact with you, they can get in contact with you. You can't block a motherfucker email. No, I think you can, but he hasn't, he hasn't done that. It's,

She can get in touch with him if the fuck she want. Like, believe she know where y'all live. She know where he works. She know where you work. You know what I mean? She's never going to go away. So I don't know if he need to go through the courts, get a restraining order. I don't know what the fuck he needs to do. But you, you don't need to be taking the responsibility for none of it because that ain't your problem. That's his problem. You know, so.

Talk to him. If not, I will give him an ultimatum. Don't nobody want to. This sounds very miserable for you. And you have to put you first at some point. Like, nah. And then you're raising kids and shit like, nah, because they're going to see that that creates havoc in your household. The shit that that y'all going through with her.

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Sociopaths, they don't feel shit. They don't care. Believe me, it'll only get worse. You know what I'm saying? So I just want to send you some healing energy, sister. And

If you feel like nobody else does or you're not seen, you're not the only one that's going through this shit right now. There's so many other women. There's men going through this shit. Just hang in there, though. But definitely open that line of communication and then therapy could be something as well. And the reason why I say therapy is because it may be...

It may be a reason, like a deeply rooted reason that goes back to like childhood or something for him, why he does not respond to negativity like hers or

or the negativity that you get from it or anything. It may be a reason that he does not, you know what I'm saying? So try to get to the bottom of that, you know, because it's a lot of unhealed people who has gone through traumatic experiences in their childhood. Maybe it wasn't as far back as childhood. It can be anything. Maybe he had an ex-girlfriend before this 27-year marriage. And, you know, maybe there was an incident that happened. Anything you don't know unless you ask questions, you

You know, so therapize. I mean, therapize. I think that's the word. If it's not, I like the way it's saying off rolling off my tongue. Therapize the situation and shit. You know what I'm saying? Counsel the situation. Girl, listen, this sound like a whole fucking Lifetime movie, but I understand Lifetime movies are made from true stories, real stories, you know, and this is this is very dramatic. So talk to your husband. Y'all go talk to somebody professional. Figure out what's going on. If that don't work.

then leave then leave get your bread get the egg and leave it's like nah but I love you and um I just want to say I'm sorry for the anger I'm so ready to have this fucking baby I'm over here playing around high off pregnancy I know that's right but yeah y'all since that story took up like 20 minutes

We going to end this right here. That was crazy, wasn't it? And then she going to say in the beginning, after the first two paragraphs, I'm going to just keep a long story short. Bitch, where? When? It didn't even start off short. You said that after two paragraphs. Yes.

I'm telling you, it was like reading a fucking commencement speech. I'm like, yo, this shit is wild. But she can spell. And her grandma was there. Punctuation marks. Everything was good. As long as y'all write me like that, I honestly don't care how long it is. I'm going to complain just because that's just my number one thing. But as long as you spell the words right, take your time, proofread your story. I mean, she threw me for a loop with the funk.

I ain't know what she meant about a funk, but I think she was trying to say fake the funk or whatever. So the ex-wife would be favored in this situation, but that's a shitty situation. Give me feedback on this. I want to start doing feed. I'm going to start getting like live feedback from my listeners who tunes into carefully records each and every Wednesday. So what I'll be doing, I'll be going live after

the podcast is released on the Carefully Reckless page, not just Hilarious page. I'm going to be going live from Carefully Reckless just so y'all can ask me questions, give me feedback on the stories and all that type of stuff. And then you never know, maybe the person who the story is about may pop up in the live to answer questions because I can't answer more than what they give me. That's why I ask them questions back. Sometimes they update me with stories and response. Sometimes they don't. But yeah, I want to start doing

doing a live where I actually get feedback from the listeners and any suggestions going forward on how I can perfect my craft and my methods of how I give advice. Don't try to give me no motherfucking advice.

on how to read because I don't need it. Okay. I'm just letting y'all know right now. Like that's not what we already do. I'm talking about different stories, how to pick them, all of that things that y'all want to see more of and all that because some people send me things that I'd rather not. Yeah. If y'all see the shit that people send me,

sometimes I'll be like I'd rather not tell this person's story this is crazy they need a professional like if I know I can't help you I'm not even going to just exploit your story for no reason like I mean expose your story just just so people can hear it people be going through shit man this is it's tough it's tough out there I just say that so just keep everybody in your prayers check on your fucking family members and your friends and make sure they're doing good um

And I'm going to leave you all with this. Don't just settle for, oh, I'm good. Like, you know how you check on somebody, somebody be like, oh, I'm good. How are you doing? That's so generic. That is like, even when people doing bad, they're just, they get in it. We get in the habit of saying, oh, I'm good and be lying like a bitch. Okay. So ask somebody like, like what my boyfriend always asked me.

How are you doing mentally? What are you thinking about? Anything you want to talk about that you've been thinking about? Like he can definitely look at me and tell what mood I'm in or something just upset me. I don't care if it's Charlemagne or Envy at work or anything, my job or touring or one of my agents or one of my family members. Like it could be anything that's bothering me. Like even down to pain that I'm feeling, anything, it don't matter. Or if I'm pondering for too long is okay.

What's up? You want to talk about something or, you know, and most of the time, well, sometimes I'm not always ready, but he creates that safe space for me. Um, then that healthy environment where I can come and talk to him about anything, even if it's about him, you get what I'm saying?

So just provide healthy environments for people to come and speak to you and talk to you and feel safe. Don't expose people. You know what I'm saying? Because we do need each other and we're better together. So if we stick together, you get what I'm saying? So I love y'all. And on that note, catch me next Wednesday. Again, I will be going live after the episode drops for Catholic Reckless each and every Wednesday where you find your podcast at. And am I...

All right, just bye. I don't know. Also, give me suggestions on how to close out because I don't be having time. That's why I just need to have this baby. I'm really irritated. So, yeah, bye, y'all. See y'all next week.

Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I'm a good lawyer and I want to win. I'm a savage. I think I killed JT.

She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not going.

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