Cousin Love
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People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, E., Jonathan Sheckner, Billy Porter, and so many more. And I want to thank you all for being here.

Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome to Can't Believe Reckless, a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. And just like that, we're back with yet another... Excuse me.

No. What in the fuck? A piece of steak flew the fuck to the back of my throat. Hold up. Excuse me. Damn. Before you left, did you make sure I was all right? She ain't trying to pat a bitch back or nothing. She said, do you want some water? Excuse me? Shit.

All right. Hey, y'all. We back. Because you fucking tried. Shut up.

Okay, so welcome back to yet another Calfly Reckless episode with your girl Jess Hilarious. I'm in here with Taylor. Y'all say hey to Taylor. Taylor, say hi back. Hi, y'all. All right, cool. So I'm going to be reading today and Taylor's just going to be assisting me with fixing y'all mess. All right, so we're going to dive right in. Hi, Jess. Let's dive in. So I've been played by my girlfriend so bad and I'm going to tell you how. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about three months, but knew each other for over a year and things have been good so far.

We have a very good communication and very open with each other. Well, at least I thought so. Jess, she has this cousin, which she claimed she was oh so close to. And I get it because I have a close cousin as well. So I didn't really think nothing of it. They will always be on the phone just chopping it up. And the conversation didn't seem off at all. We even all went out to a party one time. Nothing out of the ordinary. Right. OK, cool.

So the cousin calls her one day and she's crying her eyes out, saying she has nowhere to go and nobody. So, of course, my girlfriend offers her a place to stay.

In parentheses, I would do the same for my cousin. I bet you would. She finally pulls up to the house and we all was in the living room talking. You know, just to get more insight on what's going on. She claimed her cousin and her roommate got into it over some dumb shit. Girl, I didn't even understand it, nor did it make sense, but whatever. It was getting late, so we gave her a blanket and a pillow so she can sleep on the couch.

It's like 3 a.m. And I got up to use the bathroom. But something told me before I lay back down, just go check on her. Mind you, my girlfriend usually leaves for work around 245. Damn, what the fuck she do? 245 in the morning? All right. That's your business. So I'm thinking it's just me and her in there because I thought my girlfriend was gone. I peek around the corner and this bitch get her pussy ate. Oh, yeah. Excuse me.

Wait, the cousin or your fucking girlfriend? Oh my God. All right, let's continue the story. So I go out there like, hold the fuck up. And surprise, surprise, surprise. It's my girlfriend down there eating that shit. Oh shit. So your girlfriend wasn't even getting her pussy ate. She was eating her cuss. Ew.

Okay, so that must not be her fucking cousin. I know, I know. That was very much Gibbs and Suss, but that ain't the fucking cousin. That's one of them bitches that she called her cousin. Okay. That's how she got on the couch. Okay. I charged at both of those bitches and started throwing fists. I know that's right because I would have done the same thing. I saw this little pole by the couch and I picked it up and started beating them with that too. Hold up. Damn. Wait, wait, wait. Hold up. Shit. What? Because I was with you until you said you grabbed the pole and started beating both of them bitches.

They didn't really have much to say while I was whooping their ass. What the fuck could somebody say? Why did he? Okay. And that's the thing. I don't even know if it's a he. Maybe it's a she. I don't know. Let's see. Let's finish. And then hopefully we can say, okay, they didn't say anything, but they did leave. Mind you, it's her house. But right after they're dumb asses left, I got all my shit and fucked up a lot of her shit and left.

Jess, I really don't have no questions or anything, but I feel so fucking goofy. Like, what do you think? I think you did the right thing by leaving and by charging at both of the bitches with your fist. I'm going to just say that you're a woman for crime purposes. Yeah, because if it's a nigga, I feel like he would. You know how many judges listen to this podcast, bitch? They're going to be like, all right, who the nigga? We're going to take him to jail. What do you think, Taylor?

It has to be a girl. I feel like a nigga would be like, oh, babe, what's up? It depends on the type of guy. Because some niggas don't like that shit at all.

Every nigga don't like that girl on girl shit. I hear you. Because that's still technically cheating. It is, but I feel like my nigga would get over it and be like, fuck it. Yo, hey, yo. Some guys don't be going for that shit. He would talk about it later, but he, in the midst, he'd be like, man. Mm-hmm.

But see, like, our friends was like my boyfriend. Chris, he wouldn't go for that shit. He wouldn't put his hands on us if that was me getting my pussy ate by my cousin or me. Oh, no, no. The girlfriend was eating the pussy. First of all, I'm not eating the pussy. But that's just to say, hypothetically, I was. And Chris come around the corner. He think I'm at work. But he can see me on the couch. Yeah. With my fake cousin and shit eating her pussy.

he's going to get all his shit and dip right there he's not like he ain't with none of that shit some niggas just ain't with it I don't give a fuck Neo will probably like that type of shit cause you know Neo love you know love having more than one bitch around but the thing is uh uh what the food girl I'm hungry say it loud she said nah she over here signaling for me to stop eating y'all it's okay I'm hungry you know what I mean

Wait till after. All right, give me a second. Shit. Are you happy now, Gina? All right. It's probably a girl, though. It's more like a girl. Yeah. Now, she said she don't have no questions, but she feels so goofy. What do I think? What I think is...

You did the right thing by leaving. You never wanted, because how do I trust you again after that? Right, it's like there's nothing to talk about. And then you lying about your family. Like, now mind you, they only been dating for three months. So maybe that's something that... And they were already living together? They were already living together. Y'all fighting love real fast. Okay. That's the thing. You see how fast that was? You moved in with the bitch, but you didn't even know all her cousins. See? Yeah.

Like you didn't really get to know this person, you know, because you would know ain't your fucking cousin, you know, because you would have met the family by now and you'd have met all the real cousins and shit. You feel me? You'd have seen this cousin around, you know, but they've been dealing with each other. You know what I mean? For whatever reason. Yeah. Why would she even if that's the case? Right. Right. They just be together. Mm hmm. That's weird.

Hold up, hold up. I know this shit getting good, but listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen. Peace to the planet. Charlemagne the Godhead. And I just want you to know if you're not on Amazon Prime, you're seriously missing out. It's not just about the fast, free delivery. Although, let's be real,

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like in-depth interviews and a roundup of the week's top headlines. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. For whatever reason, it probably don't work with them trying to be together or fucking with each other.

It don't really because, oh, maybe they try. Yeah. Hey, yo, that would make it so disgusting. I'm really trying not to think that they're real because that's dirty as shit. I can't I can't think of no shit like that. I just, you know, that's nasty. But I think, damn, I keep feeling like I want to give the advice to the girl who was eating the pussy.

Because I want to tell her to just be with the fucking girl. Like, just be with the girl. Be with your cousin. Or the advice you could give her is just, you know, don't move in so fast. Yeah, don't move in so fast. For one. That was already a red flag. Your ass moved in real, real, real quick. That's a red flag for you. Like, if I wanted to date you, that would be a red flag. Like, you move real quick. You know? These days, you got to get to know a person. Like, you cannot just...

be out here moving in and shit, then you can really, you really don't know a person until you move in with them. And so she showed you exactly who she was type shit. You feel me? Cause I, I noticed that, that that's one thing, even in my own experiences, you never know somebody. So you got to wake up to them. And so you got to see them before you go to bed, like shit like that. Like you. Yeah. Like I've been in relationships where I know,

I knew I'm like oh no I can't live with this nigga this is done before it even got to that I'm like oh no fuck no I can I can just tell by the way it is when I get in his car we would never ever be able to coexist in the same house together like yeah certain conversations will go like you gotta be smart you didn't tell me how old you was because I this is a dumb young move I honestly feel like you are like a little millennial of some sort um

She seem young as shit too. Cause she got balls on her. Like I ain't gonna, I ain't gonna lie. Unless she a, a OG carpet muncher, honey. Like who don't give a fuck. And unless she is like a polyamorous person, she's into polygamy. Yeah. She, she, yeah, she young. She's absolutely young. All right. I don't got no advice for that though. Other than that, like move the fuck on. Yeah.

Moving on to the next story. Hey, Jess, I've seen some advice. Me and my boyfriend had been together. Nah, I've seen some advice. That's why you need to fucking start reading again. All right? I'm going to read this. No, I'm going to read it because you're getting tired in here. All right. Hey, Jess, I need some advice. Me and my boyfriend had been together for four years. And between the third and fourth year, we took a break. We just got back together and now we have a baby. Aw, congratulations.

I love him, but we really don't see eye to eye on anything anymore. Damn. I don't know if it's postpartum for me or we really just grew apart. We don't really talk anymore and we're just cordial. I kind of feel like I lost my friend. We agreed to stay together in the same house until our baby is one year old and then he'll move out. Damn. But I'm really bored and unhappy and I don't have many friends and I don't get my get out much.

But it's hard for me to make friends in my town because they're just not my type of people. That motherfucker live in Whoville? Like nobody in the town, bitch? Like nobody? Jesus. Okay. I live in a somewhat nice town, but most of our neighbors are older. I want to start talking to guys just on a friendly level, but I still feel like that would be unloyal and messy of me.

I will feel guilty, but is it wrong if I started talking to new people? Should I wait till he moves out? I don't know, but I'm ready to enjoy my life. He has female friends and I've read the conversations and there's nothing inappropriate, but I still don't like it. I think it's disrespectful. He speaks with this girl and I've expressed to him, but he doesn't care because he feels he's not doing anything crazy. And he just speaks to her on Snapchat anyway.

I want to start having more guy friends too, but is that me doing it for the wrong reasons? Please tell me what you think. Absolutely. That's you doing it for the wrong reasons. Um, because if you have a problem with him just having like a, a strictly platonic relationship with, I mean, or friendship or whatever, uh, communication, uh,

with a female that you have told me, you just told us that he's not, it's not anything crazy. You know, why would you want to go do the same thing if you don't like it? And then I also feel like you just had a baby. So of course you're in your head about a lot of things. And then also postpartum depression is real. So it's the difference postpartum and then postpartum depression. Um, I don't know if you intentionally left off the depression part. Um, but that,

That's absolutely normal for moms to have. And what you said in the beginning of your passage kind of spoke to that when you said, I'm losing myself. I feel like I lost myself. I felt the same way after I had my daughter at 32, like literally five months ago, I felt the same way. So I definitely understand how you feel in regards to postpartum for sure.

Let's go back to your questions. Let's go back to your questions. You said, I want to start talking to people. I live in a somewhat nice town. You said, but is it wrong if I start talking to new people? It wouldn't be wrong if you guys come to that agreement and you guys like sit down and really, really...

put everything on the table because since y'all are I mean it's kind of like y'all roommates y'all not together kind of sort of right fresh till the baby the baby is right yeah I mean if you're if you really don't want to be with him and you don't want to give it a shot because this could just be a phase like a stage that y'all are in right now they were on a break before yeah right but then y'all came back together and had a baby you know what I mean so like

if this is something that you are really willing to let go and just want to be co-parents, you know, then yes, I think y'all should sit down and y'all always tell each other to be honest and be like, look, we did make this agreement to stay together until the baby, I mean, to live together until the baby is one year old.

And then you're moving out within that year. I mean, we're still not going to be together, though. So you can do you. I can do me. We just and y'all just establish rules within that agreement. Like you can't bring nobody to the house. I can't bring nobody to the house because I'm I'm assuming that.

The only reason that y'all agree to stay in the same household until the baby is one is for the baby to see mommy and daddy together, which I don't believe the baby will remember at such a young age. I mean, that's the only other reason I could think about why y'all would do that when y'all know y'all are not happy together and it's not really working together.

for y'all to be in a relationship but I mean to each his own that's that's that's what I want to do that's fine but you can't be miserable in your own household y'all made the agreement to stay you know to live in the same house together and so the baby is one but y'all it don't seem like y'all went past that with rules for being together and living together and things like that if you love me you'll listen to this commercial and then we'll be right back

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Your next question was, should I wait till he moves out to start talking to new people? I don't think so. Again, y'all just need to have a fucking conversation. You know, he's talking to people. Why you can't talk to people, you know, but don't do it because he's doing it. Do it. Do it because you want to do it. You feel like you don't have a life. You feel like you don't have friends. It's hard for you to make friends in that little town, but you're ready to enjoy your life. Honestly, if you can afford it, I would up and fucking move because living in a boring ass town like that is crazy.

I don't know. She said she live in a town full of old people. Yeah. What the fuck? She live Delaware? Shut up. That is crazy. I don't understand. Hold on. When she said, I read the conversations, there's nothing inappropriate, but I still don't like it. Okay. Yeah. You don't like it because things are not going well with y'all at home. You know what I mean? And I understand that you start any little thing about him, uh,

communicating with anybody else other than you is going to irritate you because y'all can't y'all don't even talk anymore you know what i mean like you said y'all are just cordial being cordial with your baby daddy is crazy especially when y'all live in the same house and the baby is fresh you just popped her out um especially because isn't that like the time like oh y'all

Yeah. Listen, me and Chris felt so much more deeply in love. Like after we had our baby, after we had Marley, like, cause Marley is a love child. Like she's a love child. So it's like, damn, like that made me want him even more. Made me want to, you know, pop this pussy expeditiously again. Like put another one in there, you know, you know, you're supposed to feel like that, you know, this is supposed to be joyous to you, you know, but yeah,

I just feel bad for you because, well, I have empathy. I don't want to say I feel sorry for you. No, I don't like how that sounds. I have empathy because, like I said, I can attest to...

falling into that depression after having my child. And I didn't want to believe that it was true. You never know. You never know. Sometimes it's unrecognizable like that you actually have postpartum depression. I'm not diagnosing you, honey. I'm just telling you my experience. And it sounds like that that could be what's going on.

Is he there for you, though? Have you shared these feelings with him? You know how you're feeling after y'all gave I mean, after you gave birth, like, you know, I just I don't know. I just you should take your time. You know, your focus should be on your child, not even on a relationship with her dad or his dad. I'm sorry. I don't know if you had a baby boy or baby girl, but like your focus should be on the child. And honestly, yeah.

You got to take care of your mindset because you can't even take care of the baby if you're mentally screwed up. You know, if your priorities are not aligned with your needs, like, you know, you need to make sure that you have a great mental space to take care of the baby. You need to make sure that you're healthy enough to, you know, take care of yourself as well. And honestly, what he need to be doing is giving you time.

All of the attention in the world, like trying to take care of that for you. It ain't even about a relationship. You just had a baby for him. You know, you had a baby for y'all and all a woman needs after that is

especially if she's, if she's experienced in postpartum depression is for somebody to be strong. She needs support. She needs to know that she is still beautiful. That she, you know, he has to do everything in his power to make sure you're okay. You know? Um, and that's with or without the relationship. Like I said, so just take your time, baby girl. I know it's like, I know it's kind of fucking hard to, it's easier said than done being in that position. Cause after I had my baby, I did, I did, um,

have postpartum depression. However, my partner was there to make sure he could fill whatever void that

that I had you know I was downing myself I felt like I was losing myself I felt like everything I did was wrong for the baby I felt like I would never be able to come back to work I was panicking I was like I need to do shows are my fans missing me are my fans gonna forget about me um why do I feel like I can't do anything right um is you know I start feeling guilty like oh my god like I had a baby too late in my 30s like you just start thinking you start thinking and

And then, I don't know if you're breastfeeding, but that started fucking with my milk production. Like, being depressed and stressed out, like, it decreased my milk flow. And I...

I wasn't even able to produce milk on some days. I'm like, fuck, yo, this is crazy. You know, so, but by the grace of God, she's never gone without a meal, you know. But those things, these things are important. So I'm glad that you do recognize, at least recognize the postpartum factor. But just take your time and don't focus so much on him and what he's doing. Focus on what you need to do for you.

So you can be strong for the baby. But I definitely would sit down and have a conversation with him, you know, because ultimately y'all are not going to be together. That's just what it is. You know what I'm saying? But, but if y'all are, cause like I said, this could be a phase. If y'all are, y'all just gotta, y'all gotta work. Y'all relationship need a lot of work. Cause in the, in the beginning you even say, you know, your boyfriend had been together for four years and then between the third and fourth year y'all took a break, you know? So obviously, um,

You know, and I don't even know what that would what that was about. Like, did y'all have was it was the break because of infidelity? Is somebody cheat? Does somebody not trust somebody like the judge jump back in after that break without resolving whatever the fucking problem was? Because that doesn't help either. You know, y'all still could be one of y'all. Both of y'all could still be thinking about why the fuck y'all had to take a break the first time. And that might have to do with.

him talking to the girls. Yeah, exactly. Because you, I'm not going to say you seem insecure. You just seem, yeah, a little bit insecure, but you, you do seem like this is something that you had to deal with before. Like how you explained it to me. And it's okay to be insecure. That's what happens. That's what happens is very normal in a relationship.

for you to feel that way. If you've had something to lead you there, if you've had, if something has happened that impacted you in that way, you know, and that put a dent in your trust, you know, but update me. I would love to know.

Just how everything turned out. And take care of that baby, boo. Take care of that baby. And just like that, do you have anything to say, Taylor? Because you is scrolling through the phone. Good, I'm thinking. It makes me think better. Okay. I mean, I agree with everything you say. I think something has to do with why did they break up in the first place? And...

They probably do have unfinished, or I should say unresolved. Yeah, unresolved. First of all, bitch, they bought me this burnt ass sauce. I really can't take a bite out of this on the air. They gonna hear this shit. It's like a fucking cracker. Listen, I'm done. Excuse me. It's a fucking famous Amos cookie. Alright y'all, I'll holla at y'all next week. Peace. That's some bullshit. ...

Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. The new year is here, and I'm trying to keep things simple this year. One

One thing to help me keep things simple is Amazon Prime. It's the cheat code to staying locked in on whatever you need. It's not just fast delivery. Prime's a whole experience. From Prime Video and Amazon Music to Prime Free One Day Delivery. It's got everything to keep my years stress-free. Watching Thursday Night Football? Prime's got you with the same day snack delivery. Want to chill after the game? Find a movie on Prime Video and kick back with some Amazon Music. Whatever you're into, it's on Prime.

Visit Amazon.com slash Prime now. Consider this is a daily news podcast, and lately, the news is about a big question.

How much can one guy change? They want change. What will change look like for energy? Drill, baby, drill. Schools? Take the Department of Education closer. Health care? Better and less expensive. Follow coverage of a changing country. Promises made, promises kept. We're going to keep our promises. On Consider This from NPR. Listen on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

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People, my people, what's up? This is Questlove. Man, I cannot believe we're already wrapping up another season of Questlove Supreme. Man, we've got some amazing guests lined up to close out the season. But, you know, I don't want any of you guys to miss all the incredible conversations we've had so far. I mean, we talked to A. Marie, Johnny Marr, Eve, Jonathan Schechter, Billy Porter, and so many more. And I want to thank you all for being here.

Look, if you haven't heard these episodes yet, hey, now's your chance. You gotta check them out. Listen to Questlove Supreme on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.