Don't Be "Emburrassed"
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She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronalde. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop.

I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate the power of attorney. Always bet on tax. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu. Gear up for outdoor adventures with the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder. This midsize SUV is designed for epic journeys, offering spacious seating for eight, available panoramic moonroof, and an available intelligent four-wheel drive feature with seven drive modes to take your off-road experience to new heights.

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Oh shit, and just like that, we back on the air. Welcome back to another episode of Catholique Reckless with your girl, Jess Hilarious. Get your tea, it's story time. Okay, so one of my ex-friends, she has a daughter, right? Now, I went to the little girl's birthday party. It's cool, everything's nice, a bunch of kids, okay? She was turning three years old. All right, cool.

I see her, I pick her up. I'm like, hey baby, what's going on? What's going on? Now, usually at three years old, you can construct sentences. Every kid learns at their own pace. I do know that every child is different. Every girl is different. Every little boy is different. Even when you have two babies, the first child may not experience with the second child experience or whatever, right? So I picked the baby up. I'm talking to her. I said, you look pretty today. She said, nah.

So I said, no, say thank you. She said that right now. I put it down. I said, your hair looks pretty. Did mommy do your hair? She said that like you can tell from her gestures. She wanted to talk. She wants it. She understood everything I was saying. She just couldn't respond. Now she's three again. I go to her mother. I pull it to the side. I said, yo, um, did you,

you notice that baby girl don't talk. And she like, yeah, she's stubborn. So I said, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. She was just happy, you know, to talk to me. You know, now babies love me. Kids love me. If y'all are avid watchers of Jess Hilarious, then y'all know my mother runs a preschool, you know. All the kids love me. I have like a...

a bond with kids that is very unique. It's different. It's not like a Gucci, Gucci, Gucci, but it's like on some, it's different with me. I'm like the major pain, but the kids love me for some reason. All kids love me. So I'm like, baby Carol can't talk. So she's stubborn. I said, no, she wasn't being stubborn with me. Like she was cool. I was asking her questions and I could tell that she wanted to say yes and thank you and all that, but she couldn't.

You know, she three years old. I ain't seen in a while, but she three. She should be saying something. She said, girl, she already she talked in the house. I said, all right, cool. Come time to cut the cake. Then they opening gifts. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to baby girl. Happy birthday to you.

And many more. And after I hit the and many more, she tried to repeat me. And she said, like she she couldn't she just couldn't put a word together. It was just coming out as sounds. So I pulled them over to the side again. I said, look, you'll see. Like she tried to repeat what I said, but she just couldn't put the letters together to do it.

She said, Jess, my daughter good. She good, yo. She good. She just mean. She ain't had no nap today. Giving me all the young, typical mother excuses of why your child is not cooperating today. She didn't have a nap. She hungry. Oh, she don't even know what's going on. Oh, I pulled her hair too tight when I put her ballies on. Baby girl, your daughter can't talk. This is what I'm telling you. So fast forward a couple months later.

She brings the baby over my house. Now, Ashton loved kids as well, and kids love Ashton. So he'd take her, play with her. Now, we have a dog. I got a little French bulldog. At this point, he was still a baby. So, you know, when puppies are little...

They see other kids. They like to get happy. They get excited. She got afraid. She got scared. She screamed to the top of her lungs. And I said, what's wrong? What's wrong? And I said, is it the dog? Say dog, dog. She was like, oh, oh, oh. Like, yo, it was just bothering the fuck out of me that I knew that this baby had a developmental disorder. Yeah.

You know, it was something going on. She wants to talk. There is something not right. She needs speech classes, right? Now it was just me and her mother. We wasn't in a party setting. We was in my kitchen. I said, look,

That baby needs speech classes. Have you ever? She said, look, we're not doing this today. I said, no, we're going to do this. This is for your baby. She's like, bitch, there's nothing wrong with my child. There's nothing wrong with my child. She got upset. She took her baby. She left. I haven't seen a baby since. Haven't seen her. Haven't talked to her. But this is the thing. What she said to me stuck out in the back of my mind. She said, there's nothing wrong with my child. I'm not being embarrassed. You're not about to try to sit here and embarrass me.

About my child, like every kid learn that they own pace just because she not doing what Ash was doing at three. Now, first of all, I never bought my child into it. I never bought my child into this. I'm noticing something about your child who I love dearly just that she was mine. Don't do that.

I'm your friend. If we friends are supposed to be able to tell you and pull you to the side instead of going to talk about your ass to our other friends or or or telling somebody else your business. You know, I'm coming to you from mother to mother. There is something wrong with your child. That's it.

So with that being said, I haven't spoken to her, which brings me to the carefully reckless discussion. Now, as a parent, it is your duty, your everlasting duty to guarantee your child protection. You are supposed to protect, provide, love.

You are a safe place for your child. You know what I'm saying? But protect is first and foremost, whether you're a dad or a mom. And that's not only protecting from bullying, protecting from, I mean, I'm supposed to protect you, period. You know what I'm saying? Protect them from everything. I'm supposed to nourish, take care of you, further educate you. You know, I'm supposed to do that.

If you're not a teacher, you ain't the smartest parent. All right, cool. But you can teach your child. You teach a child without even knowing you're teaching. A parent is a child's first teacher before they even discover what child care is, before they even discover what a daycare is, before they even hit preschool, before they go to elementary school. You are their first teacher. So just know that every birthing mother,

is a teacher not coming at adopted mothers. I have to put that out there because everything is so fucking sensitive. But as a mother, the first thing I thought when I gave him birth, my son was damn, this is a whole nother life. And the cycle repeats itself. You have to protect your child. And my opinion, my ex friend was not protecting her child. You're worried about the embarrassment that you're going to face.

versus the embarrassment that she's going to face when she grow up. Why wouldn't you try to get it under wraps right now? The baby was three when this happened. But the baby, she got another birthday coming up. She'll be four. And I hope that

that, you know, if she is listening to this, that she did get help or this drives her to do it. There are so many instances and so many cases that I see where parents are too proud, too proud to even admit that their child has an issue, whether it be ADHD, whether it is, you know, a deformity, a physical deformity of some sort, whether it's dyslexia, whether your child stutters badly, whether Tourette syndrome, whatever.

You can't worry so much about yourself that you forget the livelihood of your child. You forget that they have to grow up and be a you as well. And when I say you, an adult, a mother, a father, you can't do that. Now you're now dictating their life at this point and you're not thinking of them as an individual. You're thinking about yourself. Hold up, hold up. I know this shit getting good, but listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen.

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We have to give up the I's and the me's and the my's when we give birth as mothers. You know, we have to give that up. You

You gotta give up on yourself sometimes to be there for your children. That's one of the hardest jobs is being a mother, let alone a single mother. I give all the power to y'all, all the kudos to y'all. But being a mother period is a job. Not saying being a dad is not. So I'm gonna say parent. Now, speaking in terms of my friend, being a mother, I know it's hard. Every time I open up my mouth about the baby's speech, it put a damper on her day. She was upset. She was pissed.

She felt like I was coming at her. Baby, I'm not coming at you. Imagine who the fuck gonna come at this baby when she grow up and she can't talk. Protect your child from that shit. You can protect her from all this shit right now. Take her ass to Kennedy Krieger. Go get her an evaluation.

Take care of her. Be her hero because she can't talk. She's three. She is at least supposed to be saying ABCs. Do you understand me? At three, y'all got to pay attention to y'all babies. Y'all have to evaluate y'all children. You have to. You

You can protect them from so much from their lives being, you know, miserable or them having to live with the flaw so big that they don't get to see themselves. We have the power as mothers, as mothers, as fathers to change that shit. Now, a lot of times it's not a lot of things that you can do. We have artistic children. We have children who are born artists.

you know, limbless or you can't walk or you have a birth defect that prevents you from doing things that you want to do. You know, children that can't run because they have polio or, you know, anything of that nature. We still have to do what the fuck we can to make them feel as equal as possible to other children who don't have these problems. I had another girl that I knew, you know,

I'm saying I know her like she wasn't related to me, but fuck her, 'cause I'm mad at her. She ain't get no help for our child, you know? One of my cousins, I don't give a fuck, right? She had a son. He had dyslexia. Nobody knew this for a long time. One of his teachers, when he got in the first grade, said something to her about it. Do you know this bitch tried to fight the teacher? Like,

I don't understand how as a mother you can have so much fucking pride that you can't even take a teacher informing you about a struggle that your child has, a developmental disorder. Are you serious? Crazy. She tried to fight the teacher.

She was banned from the school. She took my little cousin out of school, put him in another school. Right now, look, he could talk. He could do everything to solve math. He just couldn't spell and he couldn't read, but talk perfectly. He was bad as hell. Little cousin was bad as shit. But, you know, that was the one issue that he had, you know, mentally, he could not do it. It was just something that he couldn't do as he was growing up.

His behavior got worse. He would get so frustrated with not being able to read what he would lash out in school. He would lash out at home doing homework. He would lash out on his mentor. He would lash out doing whatever. She diagnosed him and said that he had bipolar disorder. Never got him evaluated or nothing, but you're going to tell the fucking family he has bipolar disorder so we won't be looking at him. That's the reason that we won't be looking at him crazy when he lash out at the fucking cookouts and shit because he can't read with the rest of his fucking

cousins who got grade A report cards and shit and who like, you're selfish as fuck as a mother. So she would start beating him, beating him, fucking him up when he would while out. And he was like eight or nine at this point. And he would tell her, I can't read it. I can't read. I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. Like real mad. Like if I can't do it, I'm not doing it. And don't ask me to. He had to live with that for eight years. His father got him help.

His father got him out. She was beating on his baby, beating on his little kid, beating on him, thinking that he just being nonchalant, not doing it right because he want to give her a hard time. No, he can't read, dumbass. And he's telling you. And you're so prideful because you think your child is supposed to be perfect at everything. You don't want to be one of those parents who have to endure something being wrong with their child. It's OK. Shit happens.

Every child is not born the same. And these are issues that you have to deal with before it affects the rest of their fucking lives. They're innocent. They didn't ask to be here. Take care of your children. Take care of your children. Evaluate them. Get to know them. Catch on to bodily functions. Catch on to the motor skills. Catch on to signs.

Body language, catch on. Try to do your own learning time to see what your child knows before you even send them to school or send them to daycare to be in the care of somebody else. You can catch it your damn self before somebody else catches it, you know? It's okay to have a child with disabilities. It is. It's all right. What the hell? You have to own it. You have to be honest with yourself. Your child needs you first. Shit, if you in denial, what the fuck you think they gonna feel?

You have to understand it's for your children's greater good, your child's greater good.

Now, a lot of times it has nothing to do with the mother. Sometimes it just happens. Some children are born. Some things are hereditary. Some things are not. Some things come from you not having a healthy pregnancy. People doing whatever they want when they're pregnant with their bodies. That's why y'all really joke certain celebrities about going vegan to carry babies or not only eating certain things and only...

You know, you have to do that, especially when you get up in age and you have babies. You're at risk. You know, your risk is greater. The risk of losing the baby or giving an unhealthy birth or whatever, having all these issues, those chances increase when you're older.

And that's usually what after 35 or something. I don't want to don't quote me on statistics, y'all. I'm just saying, matter of fact, let me stop throwing out these goddamn numbers. Y'all be like, Jeff said, if you're 36, you better not have no babies because I because y'all know y'all do it. I ain't say that. All I'm saying is the older you get, the chances of you having a high risk pregnancy is greater.

And my little cousin who had dyslexia all that time and a learning condition that he had to deal with. My cousin was smoking cigarettes her whole pregnancy. When her water broke, she was banging a fucking thug. That mean in Baltimore, that mean she was smoking a cigarette. She was banging the shit out them thugs.

The fuck? And they want to be in denial when it comes out that your son was affected by it. Down the line, why the fuck would you even still consider smoking cigarettes when you're carrying a life inside of you? He's breathing the air you breathe. You're putting tobacco in his system voluntarily. Bitch, that shit made me so mad, you know? Now we got a commercial. And if you click off this podcast, I swear I'm gonna beat your ass. Listen.

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State Farm Insurance also cares about the growth of black communities. They're actively investing in programs and initiatives that help provide financial literacy, give early career advice, and grow black-owned businesses, thus leading to generational wealth, which helps protect the future of our communities. We want to build a future that we all can be proud of.

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That brings me to Just Fix My Mess. Now I asked online, has anybody ever had to undergo any of these situations or was ever put in a predicament where you had to tell a friend or a family member that their child is mentally challenged or their child is challenged with something or their child is struggling with something that they need to pay attention to. They need to take heed to it. They need to get it under control. I asked that and I'm gonna read off a few responses.

T underscore I says this is me right now. Not so much as in denial, but overwhelmed. We recently found out that my son have dyscalculia, which causes him to have higher anxiety. So I'm trying to see who all I can tell without the typical black family bullshit and actually get help and cope with this.

Well, I love the honesty about it. I'm glad that you even took him to the doctor to get him evaluated, that he was diagnosed and that y'all actually know the condition now. So now that y'all have to move forward. If you don't want to tell anybody, tell them when you're ready. It's just you that needs to know because it's not really that people need to know your business. It's just to the point where parents get so afraid and they get so, oh my God, oh my God, why my child...

To the point where they don't even do anything about it because they're just so scared of what other people will think. So it's not really all about what other people will think. It's how it affects you. And hindsight, you're becoming one of those people that you don't want to find out if you ain't helping your child. Because now you're judging your child. That's what that is when you don't get help. I appreciate you sharing that with me from mother to mother. And...

The typical family bullshit, baby, that's going to come. You just got to be the hero for your child. You just got to always let him know that you got his back no matter what.

Hillary Banks 4.0 says, I adopted my youngest daughter. She has PTSD and ADHD. My lady thinks my daughter is being disrespectful when she gets upset and elevates her voice. But she gets that way when she's overloaded and overwhelmed with emotion. She's in denial. My daughter has actual clinical diagnosis.

I get it. I definitely get it. And she needs clinical help as well. Now understand Hillary Banks. I don't know your real name. So I'm just going, you know, say Hillary Banks because that's your Instagram name. Understand this Hillary. If your lady...

has no kids. I'm not going to say she won't necessarily never understand, but it's going to take her a long time to understand what parenting is like. Now, if she does have children, maybe her children didn't suffer from this PTSD and ADHD. So it can be a lot on people. Listen, I'm around parents all the time who struggle with that. It takes a lot of patience to deal with children, period. But when they have these diagnoses, these disorders like ADHD and PTSD, I know that child is going through some shit.

You know, so you have to also be cognizant of how your lady feels as well. Not choosing one over the other. Not because you supposed to choose your kids, but you still have to get her the proper help so she can get better and also give your lady the benefit of the doubt because it can seem very disrespectful when a child raises their voice and be wilding out and shit. You know what I'm saying? So make sure that you're taking everybody's feelings into consideration. Right.

Call me G08 says my sister-in-law was in denial about my nephew's autism. We saw he had problems with social interactions and proper behavior. So my brother took him to get tested and he was diagnosed with a mild form of autism. He's doing much better now since he started therapy. See?

problem solving. I'm not going to say problem solved. No, they can't take his autism away, but they can get him help so he can cope better in certain situations. There are all levels of autism, a lot of different levels to it. You got Asperger's that's, that's, that's the mildest. Those people can still look at you, have conversations with you. Then you have the

total other opposite end of the spectrum where those people don't walk. They never look at you, you know, and a lot of them can't even talk, but they're still smart in their own right. You know what I'm saying? And the movie that y'all should watch, I don't know if you ever seen it, but watch it. It's called Mercury Rising. Mercury Rising is about a kid with autism. I think it would definitely shed some light on parents who actually take care of autistic children. But yes, back to my point, I'm glad that they got him therapy

Now, as far as your sister-in-law being in denial about it, you know, I see that all the time. Now, a lot of times it depends on how long you are in denial because I get it. You see something wrong with your child. You don't know what to do. You scared. You don't want to tell your family. Your family may judge you. You don't want to tell this person because this person may laugh. You don't want to tell this person because then you don't want to look like, you know, you don't want to look weak. You know, I get it.

But the longer it takes for you to get yourself together, the longer it takes for the child as well to get help. You got to figure that out and get some help sooner than later.

Last one I'm going to read. Anti-social underscore butterfly with two Y's. My best friend, her baby didn't walk till after two. He'll be three next week. And he is nonverbal and she tells people he's nonchalant. Whole time she's never took him to a pediatrician. Same situation I just had while I just told you all about with one of my family members. Nonchalant. Okay.

Okay, so when he grows up, what's gonna be the excuse? What are you gonna tell people when he grows up? Oh, no, no, no, better one. What is he gonna be able to tell people when he grow up? Not a goddamn thing 'cause he's nonverbal. If he can't talk now, he ain't gonna be able to talk when he gets older. So shit, get some help for these babies. This shit is frustrating as shit. It's frustrating. That shit can play a big part in your mental health as well.

Which is not a goddamn joke. We've seen this for the last few years. It's been put all over the place. Now, a lot of people are aware of what mental health can really do and how bad it can really get. So y'all need to get behind this.

And I'm not fussing at everybody because everybody doesn't have these issues. But I know somebody that knows somebody that knows somebody that does know someone else that knows, you know, word of mouth. Don't be scared to be honest with your friends. Shit, beat it in their heads until they get out. And on that note, I'm going to end this shit before I cut some parents out on it.

motherfucker man get these babies together and on that note I love y'all to death tune in next week each and every Wednesday which is hump day and in my best Pam voice peace

Carefully Reckless is a production of iHeartRadio and The Black Effect. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I'm a good lawyer and I want to win. I think I killed GT.

She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop.

I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate the power of attorney. Always bet on tax. Reasonable Doubt. New episodes Thursdays. Streaming only on Hulu. Gear up for outdoor adventures with the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder. This midsize SUV is designed for epic journeys. Offering spacious seating for eight, available panoramic moonroof, and an available intelligent four-wheel drive feature with seven drive modes. Take your off-road experience to new heights.

Discover the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder at NissanUSA.com. Intelligent all-wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Touring capacity varies by configuration. See Nissan Touring Guide and Owner's Manual for additional information. Always secure cargo. Most deals are barely worth mentioning, but then there's AT&T's best deal on the new Samsung Galaxy Z Flip 6 featuring FlexCam with Galaxy AI. You can get in on them when you're trading your

eligible smartphone any year any condition it's a deal so good you'll be shouting from the rooftops so grab a ladder and learn how to get that new phone on at&t at&t connecting changes everything requires trading of galaxy s note and z series smartphone limited time offer 256 gigabytes for zero dollars additional fees terms and restrictions apply see att.com samsung or visit an at&t store for details