Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
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She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronalde. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop. I think I love it, love it. Never underestimate.
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And just like that, we back on the air. Welcome to yet another episode of Carefully Reckless with your girl, Jess Hilarious. Now, this story time is about me. I ain't going to talk about nobody else. This shit is about me. And hopefully I can bring y'all into my world so y'all can open up about y'all world. Grab your tea, grab your halls, because I'm about to get into it.
Now, I remember I was dealing with this guy. This is not too long ago. I was dealing with this dude, right? And I wanted to introduce him to my cousin. Now, my cousin, if you know me, y'all know she like my sister, my best friend, my other half. She helps me run my company. She is my executive assistant. Yes, that's my girl, my baby London. All right. Now, nigga, if I am fucking with you and I tell you I'm going to introduce you to my cousin to London, that means you come pretty far. You got a lot of potential behind you, brother.
I set it up perfectly. Reservations at a nice restaurant. Me and her got there first. So we're awaiting this gentleman's arrival. As we're waiting, I'm pumping him up. I'm boosting him up. Oh, he does this for me. He does that for me. He's this type of guy. Oh, he's great. He's great. Leaving all the minor bad shit out because it's just like, okay, nobody's perfect. Okay, I can deal with this little shit. So I'd rather not speak on that.
Then, by the way, just so you know, my cousin is very critical. As am I with her. So, you know, it's vice versa. I'm critical about who the fuck she fuck with. She critical about who I fuck with. Okay? Fine. We all want the best for each other. The gentleman arrives. He sits down. He's already drunk. Okay, fine.
Hopefully he can handle his liquor in front of my cousin. We ain't drunk yet, but we getting there. So hi, this is my cousin London. My cousin London, this is such and such. Okay, everything is great. We get around the shots after we eat. Everything is cool. This nigga just start getting disrespectful out of his motherfucking mouth. And I don't mean calling me out my name. I don't mean calling her out her name, being rude to her or whatever. This is exactly what happened.
I turned to London, who I was with when I met the gentleman years ago. So London knows this gentleman from seeing him the first day I met him. Didn't hear of him after that until we just got reacquainted a couple months ago. And she hasn't seen him since then.
So I said, London, this man don't believe that the first time I met him was that time I was with you down at Outdoors event and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So London says, sir, that is the first time that you met her. I recall that. This motherfucker opens up his mouth and says, nah, I was fucking her before that. Oh,
I said, sweetheart, we're not going to do that like this. I understand you drunk, but you need to watch your motherfucking mouth, okay? Before your mouth be on the floor. That's all I'm going to say. He get the giggling, I get the giggling, but I get the back serious real quick, okay? I can see in London's face that that comment was very cringy. So London says, no, no, no, no, no. Let's just calm down. She starts rubbing my knees. She already know the type of bitch I am. And she already know that this shit ain't going to go right. Period.
Now I am embarrassed because I bought this nigga in the presence of my cousin, someone who sometimes I look for approval from. She my big cousin. You know what I'm saying? I grew up with her. I don't have too many cousins that I look at like that. And my whole 29 years of living, I introduced London to three guys.
Three guys And my roster a bit long You know what I mean Like yeah I'm talking about the history It's like it's a bit long You know what I mean Like so she only met three of those niggas
Okay. You see what type of importance she holds. I don't just bring anybody round her. You feel me? I started to regret it immediately. He get up and go to the bathroom. I'm telling London, she trying to calm me down. I'm like, yo, I really feel that I'm a slap shit out this nigga before the night is over. Real shit like that. I really, really feel that. So,
So I bring Uno everywhere. I don't give a fuck if it's a five-star restaurant or McDonald's, nigga. I'm playing Uno with you if we sitting down eating. While we're waiting for dessert and more shots to come, I pull out Uno. He already see how pissed off I am. So I guess this is his way of trying to make me feel better. Now, we are very sexual with each other. We're sexually compatible and I love it. But this man showed me his true colors that night. He can't hold his liquor at all. And this is how I know.
He shuffled, I dealt. While I'm dealing, I like to make bets for Uno. You know what I'm saying? Y'all know I like it. I win all the time. So why wouldn't I bet? As I'm dealing, this nigga looks up and he says, if I win, you giving me some head tonight, right?
Strike three. Now you're done. Needless to say, I don't feel the same about that motherfucker anymore. I'm telling you, yo, listen, it is so funny how you can love everything about a person. Right. In the beginning, even in the middle. Fuck the end. You know what I mean? You can love everything about them to the point where you overlook minor shit because everybody got something with them. You know, nobody's perfect.
Isn't it amazing and shocking how fast all that shit can change within a blink of an eye? That motherfucker can do one thing and turn you completely off. Now, I'm an Aquarius. I'm not really big on astrology, but I do embody some of the characteristics and some of the traits of what they say a true Aquarius is. Okay. And.
One of the things that I do notice that they say about my sign is once you're turned off, you're turned off. That's completely to fuck it because it happened that night. That's where he knew he fucked up. That was it. I ain't look at the motherfucker right since. And this was just last week.
It's like once you start to give a motherfucker a lot of you, not even all of you, because I'm very adamant about that. I don't want to give you all of me just yet. I want to at least be six months in before I give you all, you know, but I gave a lot. God damn near a lot. A good 70%.
You was waiting on that cool 30, you feel me? But you had 70. You done made me drop that shit down to 20, 20%. I don't look at them the same. Yeah, sometimes I still find myself missing the sex, but you can get good sex from anywhere. You got to have every type of quality to gain my interest and to keep it.
That ain't how you keep me. And then another thing, ladies and gentlemen, when my cousin bought it to this nigga's attention, he didn't apologize. When I bought it to this nigga's attention after me calming down and, you know, get myself together because y'all know how I can be. He did not apologize. In fact, he flipped the whole shit on me. That's the most toxic shit if I ever seen it. Listen,
You can go, you can stay where the fuck you at. Actually, you can go back to whoever the fuck you was with before because that's probably why you ended up that person's ex anyway, you dumb ass nigga. So now you fucked up. That's it. That's all you got to do is disrespect me after I'm telling you to stop disrespecting me and then you're done. Hold up, hold up. I know this shit getting good, but listen to just a couple seconds of a commercial. If you love me, you'll listen.
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Needless to say, my cousin don't fuck with the nigga because I didn't fuck with the nigga. And no, I did not expect for her to fuck with him after that. She didn't even want to see him again for a second time after that. This is what happens when you know your family, when you know yourself. You know what I'm saying? You pick up on shit early.
Now, no, I did not post that nigga. Never have. Never will now. You know that. Because it ain't going to go nowhere else now. And that was just like, we in that stage where he trying to figure out my angle and I done already figured out that I was done. You know what I'm saying? So for him, it's like, oh shit, now I got to try to do all this to get back. Now I got to try to, now I got to try to, now I got to try to. But if you wasn't grown enough to realize that you were wrong.
and that you immediately should have made a U-turn and apologized and tried to de-escalate what had escalated, you was done. You should have known. You lost me, big fella. You lost me, champ. And that's just what that is. That's how I feel about the situation. So today's topic is that of your family not liking your woman or your man and shit. Like your family having issues with the person you're dating.
Because that's exactly what happened in my world last week, y'all.
Now you have to think about it. If this is going on with you and your significant other, you have to step back and realize what's going on. Why do they not like him? Why do they not like her? Is it something that he or she has done in the eyes of them? It could be many different reasons why your family don't get along with your boyfriend or your girlfriend or your wife or your husband. It could be so many reasons. It could be something that that person is doing to you.
My cousin London did not like the nigga because of how he disrespected me. Now listen, I'm also tell you that's not the first time he did that shit to me. But I do notice it happens when he's drunk. So bing, light bulb, don't fucking drink around me or fall back on that shit. Get your shit together. I don't deserve that.
I don't deserve that. As rough and tough as I am, I'm a good goddamn girl. I'm a great woman to a man. I'm a good goddamn girlfriend. I'm great. I'm wifey material, nigga. That's what guys need to understand. How to treat the right ones. I don't give a fuck what happened to your past. If you didn't let that go yet, you don't need to be here. Obviously, it's you. If you keep losing women, if you keep losing women, all these bitches keep... Then it ain't the bitches, baby. It's you. You need to figure yourself out. Figure out what the fuck you can do to be better. Because this ain't it.
Also, both men and women can attract the same type of people. I'm not going to say wrong, but you know, I'm going to let you say that. Y'all can say wrong if y'all want. But I hear a lot of people, I keep attracting these same type of dudes. That was my problem for a long time. You know, like you have to work on yourself. You have to see what is it?
in me that keeps attracting these broken men or these broken women, these men who don't have it all together mentally, but they got it all together on the outside or vice versa. You know what I'm saying? Women, we nurture naturally.
So if a man ain't got it all together, it's automatically in our DNA to help them with whatever. Not do everything for them. Not allow them to use us. That's not what I'm saying. That's two different things. But to help them with that encouragement.
help them endure the shit that they go through. You know what I'm saying? We as women, that's why we represent the backbone of the man. That's where you hear that behind every man, there's a strong woman. You know what I'm saying? And if you want to get real technical behind every man, there's a strong black woman. I'm just playing. I'm just playing. So there can be many different reasons, many different reasons. Sometimes the person might not even do nothing. You just got a hating ass family. You just got a messy ass family. You just got a family who like family.
the ex person better. There has been times where I've heard this shit before. Oh, they don't like my new boyfriend because they like Charles. Oh, well, bitch, Charles ain't here no more. So tell him go find Charles. Shit. You know what I'm saying? Only when you let your family's opinion of your boyfriend or girlfriend affect you to the point where it shows that
to your companion or your significant other. That's what it is. Because then you're now showing that person that they can't even trust you. How the fuck your family don't like me?
And you letting that shit rub off on you. How the fuck can't you put them in their place? Why can't you make me feel important? Because your family don't feel like I am. You know, that's when it becomes a problem. In my case, he did that shit to himself. He made my cousin not like him. And now I'm happy he did not meet the rest of my family because I got a lot of critical motherfuckers. Not only London, trust me, it's a lot more. London is just my closest cousin, my closest family member. So she knows me in and out.
Same as her. I know her in and out, you know?
Now, you also have jealous family members, okay? You may have a boyfriend or a girlfriend that you bring around your family and the females in your family may not like her because she's pretty. Now listen, that may sound stupid, but it's a lot of that bullshit out here. That's why a lot of females can't get along to this day because if you're beautiful, you're automatically intimidating and people automatically think you're stuck up. Shit like that. I see that shit in everyday life so I know how it feels to be put in a category that you ain't even in.
You know what I mean? Just based off of your looks. A lot of times ex-girlfriends still get attached to family. Ex-boyfriends are still attached to the family of their exes. So when the new person comes along, it's kind of hard to make space for that new person because that ex is lingering still. Get rid of that motherfucker or get rid of your family.
I know y'all like, what? How am I getting rid of my family? You will find a motherfucking way. If this new person is good for you, if this new person shows you something that you never felt before, if they're not lacking, if they're, you know, like I said, everybody got their shit, but if the good outweighs the bad,
You need to stick with that person. Don't rob yourself of love because your family don't want it to happen because your family can't let go of Shanisha and your baby mother and shit like that. Whatever. You ain't with that person no more. So listen, I need y'all to respectfully, respectfully stay out of my relationships. OK, because I'm trying to make it work with Christina over here. And y'all keep inviting Shanisha over here and shit. I'm not with that bitch no more. She doing her.
It's a reason why we ain't together and vice versa for women. A lot of moms get attached to boyfriends. That's what I noticed. A lot of moms get attached to girlfriends. It be the mom. Some of the dads just, you know, dads just let be whatever be. But you know, like moms are the ones.
Y'all got to break away. Y'all got to break it off. When you break it off, you got to tell your mother to break up too. I see a lot of that shit happening. Now, just because in my situation, I don't like the nigga no more. I don't look at him the same. You know, I don't really fuck with him like that anymore because of that. And then because of the aftermath of him not wanting to apologize. But that may not be the case for some of you. Some of you might have a guy who wants to redeem himself.
who immediately realized what he did was wrong and tried to U-turn it and come back and deescalate the situation. There are guys like that. There are guys willing to admit, oh shit, I did fuck that shit up, man. Let me, I can't lose out on her. She's a good thing. She's a good person. I want to make it work with her. You know, there's nothing wrong with that. Don't be quick to kick a nigga to the curb. You know what I'm saying? Especially if you see that he's trying and he's apologetic and he knows what he got and he knows he don't want to lose it. That's what matters the most.
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Lil.Painahinny on Instagram says, Okay, now there are a few things I want to disagree with in your response, Lil.Painahinny. I just, I feel like you're right.
It does make shit uncomfortable, especially if you're a family person. If you are always around your family, if you're very family oriented, I do understand how it can be uncomfortable for you. It can be kind of awkward. But like I said earlier in the episode, don't fuck around and miss out on a good thing and lose a good thing because your family's opinions matter more than your love for the person.
You understand what I'm saying? Now, you didn't give me any clarity on on what, you know, Shorty did or whatever. This is a guy. What Shorty did or, you know, I don't know, you know, your sexual preference, but you didn't give me any type of clarity on it. So I'm just going to speak on what you gave me. If it's uncomfortable for you, it depends on what the girl did. It depends on whoever you're dating. Did they do something for your family not to fuck with them? If not, then
You know, you just like your damn family. You know what I'm saying? And you always, you always gonna let them be in the way. So they gonna always be in the way. So that's it. How does it impact your relationship? Go.
Biba Rodriguez says it doesn't. We remain cordial due to our love for him. Me as wife, her as sister. We don't talk and it's not beef on site, but you're lucky if it's a high and by. Okay. So she's very, very straightforward with her shit. No, I ain't got no problems with you, but bitch don't give me nothing either. Okay. I get it. It's more so we don't fuck with each other, but we're very cordial. We can be in the same room. That's what is given. Okay.
She said, hi, bye, if you lucky, ho. But we ain't got fighting nothing. But you know what I'm saying? Keep your distance and I'm going to keep mine because it's all about the love for him.
All about the love for him. Now, what I got from that is he don't let his sister cross the boundaries because the wife don't seem like she play. OK, which is good, which is good. That's a strong willed woman who ain't gonna let nobody fuck with her. OK, so I do respect that. That's good. As long as you can keep it cordial, you're good with me. That's good for both sides, the family and the relationship.
Mob tie said it don't this between me and you. I love them, but I love you. And we are the future. Whether we'll accept it or not. It don't matter as long as me and you on the same page, we golden. And that was from a guy. I want to give a shout out to the guys. Y'all been coming through on a carefully reckless responses. I really, really do. Although you need to learn some goddamn grammar, sir. That shit was hard as shit reading that. But basically what he's saying,
is I don't let my family talk shit about my girl and I don't let my girl talk shit about my family. I love my family and I love my girl and as long as me and my girl on the same page, we golden. As long as me and my family on the same page, we golden. It don't matter who the fuck y'all don't like because I love her. Period. I like that. That's the third guy. Oh, we coming up on a woman. Adrian dot loves Jason. Oh,
Oh, she about to tell us about Jason. She says, the father of my children has a stupid bitch of a mother who is extremely jealous of the relationship that I had with her son. I say had because she is the main reason why we aren't in a physical relationship. This bitch acts like she's fucking her son. It's crazy. And through the years has turned other people in his circle against me. All I have to say is Corona got a lot, but missed a few. Oh,
Hold up. Hold up. Wait a minute. Hold up. Wait. Adrian, I'm at the talk to you off site. Okay. I'm at the talk to you off of offline. You know what I mean? Like, cause Oh my God. Now listen.
She put that shit as cold-hearted as she could, but you got to understand, more women go through this more often than not. I'm telling you, this shit happens. I was dating a guy whose mother didn't like me either. No, I wouldn't wish corona on her, but shit, you never know what that man's mother did to that woman, you know? I do want to keep you in my prayers and shit because I can see you real violent. Like, you remind me of Remy. We got to keep you in our prayers. Lord God, hide your guns. All right.
T. Riches says, if your woman slash man supports the family's behavior of not liking you, it impacts negatively and gravely, almost divorce level. I imagine it wouldn't be that bad if your woman slash man supports your outlook on it. That's actually correct. And I don't have anything to say about that because that's exactly what I said before. If you support that,
the idea of not liking your companion because of your family, then that's on you. That's on you. You will never be happy because you choose your family over your love life when they have nothing to do with that level of your life. Like that's a different type of love. The love that I can make to my wife. I can't make love to my family. So y'all gonna need to stay on your side of the fence until I come over there for the cookouts. Shit.
And the last one I'm going to read, Shy Baby 901. It don't affect me. I ain't fucking his mama in them. I love it, bitch. I love it. I love it. I love it. Now, depending on how close the guy is with his mom, usually...
It does mess up the relationship because you got a lot of mama's boys out here. But then you just have men who genuinely respect their mothers, but they're not going to let their mother step in. They're really not. At one point in time, I felt as if Lil Scrappy wasn't going to make it with Bambi because of Mama D. But that one episode where he stepped up and he told his mother, listen, Ma, I love you, but you want to stay the fuck up on my relationships.
You know what I'm saying? Like, I love this woman. I want to give her a family. I want to make a make a family with her. Like, OK, me and Erica didn't work. But look, you ain't going to do what you did with me and Erica, with me and Bambi. This is my wife right here. I'm going to marry this girl like blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. He stepped the fuck up and he got it together. Now we knew Lil Scrappy was a mama's boy, but we didn't really see it until Love & Hip Hop. Shout out to Love & Hip Hop for showcasing those types of situations because that shit is real.
That shit is real. And then vice versa. You had Rashida and Kirk going through they shit. And then you had her mother, Rashida's mother. I felt like she inserted herself a little bit too much in some of their situations. Like, especially when she ran over Kirk Mike. You know what I'm saying? Like...
Oh, you ain't your mother gonna have to pay for that shit. You know what I'm saying? But no, no, no. I realized that Rashida's mother played a big role in her life to the point where she was present for conversation she shouldn't even have been present for. You know what I'm saying? As a grown woman, you married. You know, you got married.
You know, you have sex, you made these babies by yourself. You need to tell mama to sit back on a couple of those situations. Now, we've never been privy to the conversation between Rashida and her mother telling her mom, let me just have this. I don't know if there ever was an episode where she did that and I missed it, but she could have done it off camera. But either way, Rashida and Kirk are still going strong and I love to see it. I love to see it. Ray J and Princess.
I felt like his mother had a little bit too much to do with they shit. Honestly, I did. But that is a very tight knit family. We seen that. We seen it ever since them kids was younger. You know what I'm saying? Ever since they was acting, ever since Moesha and the other show that Reggie had, whatever, you know what I'm saying? Like they have a very tight knit family.
And I know that their mother runs pretty much runs their businesses. You know, she she acts as, you know, their manager, I think. So don't quote me. But she was also invested in Ray J's love life like extremely. And we've seen how that made Princess feel all of that shit. You know, a lot of these franchises shows us.
Jim Jones' mother. Oh my God. We see, we don't even need to talk about that. We seen how that affected Jim and Chrissy. But Chrissy was not to be played with. Jim loved Chrissy and Jim loved his mama. And it didn't matter. As many times as Jim tried to put his mother in her place, it was just like, nah, nigga, this is what I'm going to do. You came out of my poom poom, motherfucker. And you're going to respect this. She going to respect me. You know what I mean? Loving hip hop over the years has shown us what that's like.
And all I'm saying is, don't let it be you. That brings me to the end of my carefully reckless episode, y'all. Y'all write me in my DM and tell me what I should do about this nigga. Should I just like start completely over with this nigga? Because I told y'all that he only act like this when he drunk. Or should I just be back on the market? Because I don't really give a fuck. Listen, once you turn me off, I'm turned off, nigga. I'm turned off. And like I said, you can find good dick anywhere. So tune in next Wednesday on Hump Day. And in my best pants.
Peace.
She needs someone who's going to fight for her. If we don't follow the right plan, we lose. The hit series Reasonable Doubt, now streaming on Hulu. She was defending herself against a monster. Starring Emma Yatze-Coronaldi. I'm the best lawyer you have ever worked with. And Morris Chestnut. I'm not gonna stop.
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Discover the 2024 Nissan Pathfinder at NissanUSA.com. Intelligent all-wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Towing capacity varies by configuration. See Nissan Towing Guide and Owner's Manual for additional information. Always secure cargo.
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