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cover of episode What we learn when things fall apart

What we learn when things fall apart

2024/12/31
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Consider This from NPR

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A
Allie Feller
M
Mary Louise Kelly
经验丰富的广播记者和新闻主播,目前担任NPR《所有事情都被考虑》的共同主播。
M
Mike Ingram
Topics
Mary Louise Kelly: 新年伊始,我们邀请听众分享他们人生中最具挑战性的一年,以及他们从中获得的经验和力量。这其中包括克服生活中的巨大困难,例如失去亲人、患病和离婚等,并从中汲取力量,变得更加坚强。 Mike Ingram: 2010年,一场车祸夺走了他23岁儿子的生命。巨大的悲痛让他一度难以承受,但他最终选择帮助其他失去孩子的父母,在帮助他人的过程中找到了慰藉和力量,并从中走出了人生的低谷。 Allie Feller: 2023年,她被诊断出患有乳腺癌,同时婚姻也走向了尽头。面对双重打击,她选择通过运动和专注于与女儿的关系来应对困境。她坦言,虽然过程中充满了悲伤和痛苦,但她始终坚持,并最终在困境中找到了平静和快乐,并对未来充满希望。 Mike Ingram: 2010年,一场突如其来的车祸夺走了我23岁儿子的生命,这无疑是我人生中最黑暗的时刻。我的儿子Michael是一位运动员,拥有无限的潜力和美好的未来,他的离去让我心碎欲绝。我一度无法想象自己该如何继续生活下去,感觉世界都崩塌了。 然而,在经历了无尽的悲伤和痛苦之后,我逐渐意识到,帮助其他失去孩子的父母能够让我自己也得到一些慰藉。我开始主动联系他们,倾听他们的故事,分享我的经历,让他们知道他们并不孤单。在与他们的交流中,我发现,倾诉和宣泄愤怒能够帮助我们释放内心的压力和痛苦,这对于走出悲伤至关重要。 帮助他人,也帮助了我自己。在这个过程中,我逐渐找到了继续生活下去的力量,并开始重新审视人生的意义。虽然伤痛永远不会消失,但我学会了与之共存,并从中汲取力量,继续前行。 Allie Feller: 2023年,我被诊断出患有乳腺癌,同时我的婚姻也走到了尽头。这对我来说是人生中最艰难的时期,我感觉自己仿佛生活在双重地狱之中。癌症的诊断让我感到恐惧和无助,离婚的打击则让我更加心力交瘁。 在最初的震惊和悲伤之后,我开始努力寻找应对的方法。我意识到,我不能让这些负面情绪吞噬我,我还有工作、还有女儿,我必须坚强起来。我开始每天去散步,虽然我是一个跑步爱好者,但当时我却无法提起跑步的动力,跑步对我来说似乎又增加了一份负担。 我开始放慢节奏,用散步来代替跑步,这让我感觉更加轻松自在。我记得在做乳房X光检查和超声波检查的那天,我走了8英里的路,尽管天气炎热,我汗流浃背,但我坚持走完了全程。这让我意识到,即使在最艰难的时刻,我们仍然可以找到释放压力和保持身心健康的方式。 在接下来的日子里,我努力保持积极乐观的心态,并专注于与女儿的关系。我明白,对于我的女儿来说,她最需要的是一个能够陪伴在她身边,关心她、爱护她的妈妈。即使在最糟糕的日子里,我也从未停止扮演好母亲的角色。我会为她准备午餐,为她梳理头发,和她一起玩耍,和她一起分享快乐的时光。 虽然我经历了巨大的痛苦和悲伤,但我仍然在生活中找到了许多美好的瞬间。例如,去年12月,我的女儿在同一个我小时候跳舞的舞蹈工作室参加了她的第一次大型舞台表演。看着她自信地表演,我感到无比的骄傲和欣慰。尽管当时我正在经历离婚的痛苦,但我仍然能够感受到这份喜悦,并从中汲取力量。 在经历了这一切之后,我更加珍惜生活中的每一个美好瞬间,也更加懂得感恩。我知道,即使在最黑暗的时刻,我们仍然能够找到希望和光明。我期待着在2025年,能够拥有更多平静、轻松和快乐的日子。

Deep Dive

Key Insights

How did Mike Ingram cope with the loss of his son?

Mike Ingram coped with the loss of his son by helping other parents who had also lost children. He reached out to them to provide support and a space to vent their anger and grief, which in turn helped him process his own pain.

What challenges did Allie Feller face in 2023?

In 2023, Allie Feller was diagnosed with invasive ductal carcinoma, a type of breast cancer, and simultaneously went through a divorce. She navigated these challenges while caring for her young daughter and managing her career as a runner and podcast host.

How did Allie Feller manage her overwhelming emotions during her cancer treatment?

Allie Feller managed her overwhelming emotions by going for long walks instead of running, which she found too physically demanding during her treatment. She also allowed herself to cry when possible but focused on maintaining her responsibilities as a mother and professional.

What does Allie Feller hope for in 2025?

Allie Feller hopes for peace, ease, happiness, joy, and fun in 2025. She reflects on the progress she has made since her cancer diagnosis and divorce, feeling more at peace and optimistic about the future.

What was a significant moment of duality for Allie Feller during her challenging year?

A significant moment of duality for Allie Feller was her daughter’s holiday dance performance in December 2023. Despite having just finished chemotherapy and going through a divorce, she experienced tremendous joy watching her daughter perform on the same stage she once danced on, even though she couldn’t bring her daughter home afterward.

Chapters
This chapter contains NPR's year-end fundraising appeal, highlighting their commitment to independent journalism and encouraging listeners to support the organization through NPR+ or donations. It also includes promotional messages for various NPR podcasts.
  • NPR's year-end fundraising appeal
  • Promotion of NPR+
  • Advertisements for various NPR podcasts including Planet Money, Fresh Air, Wait Wait Don't Tell Me, State of the World, and NPR Politics Podcast

Shownotes Transcript

Most years bring both good and bad experiences. But sometimes, it's the challenges of a bad year that show us our hidden strengths.Learn more about sponsor message choices: podcastchoices.com/adchoices)NPR Privacy Policy)