The Uncanny Eddie Cobalt - Part 1
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Welcome to the Series 2 premiere of the Curious Matter Anthology. I'm Jonathan Pezza, the creator and host of the show, and it's so exciting we are back. This season, we will venture farther into the universe of science fiction and supernatural horror, as we bring you 13 new episodes. We will be releasing every other week through the first seven, and take a small mid-season break before coming back just in time for Halloween.

Tonight's story is a mind-bending journey in the tradition of the weird tale, and it's an example of how science fiction can explore our psychological and emotional connection to the world around us in a way other fiction genres can't. The Uncanny Eddie Cobalt is based off of a short story originally published in the October 1940 issue of Fantastic Adventures.

The original was titled The Uncanny Power of Edwin Cobalt and is credited as being written by Henry Kuttner under the nom de plume, Noel Gardner. Ray Bradbury once regarded Henry Kuttner as the neglected master, and Kuttner is considered one of the seminal science fiction writers of the 1940s and 1950s. But I think it's time to put the record straight. Kuttner was known as the man with a thousand pen names, but there is a very fascinating reason why.

He had a collaborator. In early 1940, Henry Kuttner married the love of his life: Catherine Lucille Moore. If that name sounds familiar, it's because C.L. Moore is perhaps the most groundbreaking female sci-fi writer of the 1950s. And her Northwest Smith stories likely inspired one of science fiction's greatest characters: the vagabond and smuggler you all know and love, the one and only Han Solo.

Henry Kuttner and C.L. Moore are a literary love story as interesting as any tale they wrote. After the two married, it became almost impossible to tell where one's writing began and the other ended, as the two collaborated on almost everything they wrote. In fact, friends recalled them working so closely that it said they would trade off at the typewriter mid-sentence, seamlessly picking up where the other left off. They spun wild tales together,

born out of what I think can only be called a star-crossed love that was so powerful it drove them to leave the bounds of Earth and create far-off worlds big enough to encapsulate their feelings for each other. But like so many stories about love that burns this bright, it sadly ends in tragedy. In 1958, at the age of 42, Henry died in his sleep of a heart attack. Catherine eventually remarried and would go on to survive him by another three decades.

but she never published again. So in honor of that love and loss, I think it's time we finally credit the original story correctly, as written by Henry Kuttner and C.L. Moore. Now back to tonight's episode. I chose this story because I felt it had a unique perspective about the power of doubt. We have all gone through so much in the last few years. Global pandemic, sociopolitical upheaval, and the threat of a world war.

It almost feels like we're living in our own dystopian thriller, and so my adaptation of this peculiar story is an homage to that. I think it's fair to say that we all at some point in recent memory have felt like we are sitting on the edge of insanity, and that the things going on around us are so outrageous and so beyond our ability to process that you simply can't help but ask, "Is this all real?"

This episode of Curious Matter Anthology is rated explicit and includes adult language and scenes that may be shocking to some audiences, comparable to an R-rated film. Our show is designed to be a completely immersive HD audio experience, and it's at its best when played through high-quality stereo speakers or headphones. So, grab your popcorn, turn out the lights, and enjoy our presentation of The Uncanny Eddie Cobalt Part 1.

Welcome to the New York State DMV. Please sign in at one of the kiosks and wait for your number to be called on your home speaker. Not on your wife. Masks are mandatory at all times and please remember to socially distance. There, there, there, there are no roads. There's no roads, there's no city.

No city, no city, no city, no city. The grids are simply a mind page. Lines in the sand meant to convince you that there's no civilization at all. Chaos captured in a snow globe. I'm right here. To make the line palatable. But you simply need to understand, but you don't understand. Understand the mirrors in the funhouse.

Break them and see. NYPD, drop the spray can and turn around slowly. Let's pick up where we left off. It's your sesh, Doc. You make the rules. How are you doing with the new dosage? Um, you made me feel like a space cadet. Hello, Major Tom. You know, but smell it out, Sens.

Good. So it was a bit of an adjustment at this stage to find the correct balance, but you seem to be adapting well. That's the new me. Just a beacon of adaptability. Well, let's touch on the classics, shall we? Have you seen or heard anything that others can't? No, nope. Not anymore. When was the last? Months. Maybe nine. Good. Do you still struggle to trust that what you are experiencing and or thinking is real? Nope. Reality is like a rock, but not the rock.

That guy's just too likable and all together to be for real. Like, what's going on there? You know what I mean? Like, I'm thinking a sex dungeon or he's an alien. Alien seems the most plausible. Hmm. Doc, I'm effing with you. Gotta keep things a little fresh after a year of this. I'll just ask the question again then. Do you struggle to trust what you're experiencing is real? No, sir. Things are like super real. The realest. Do you believe that you have powers other people do not?

Nope. I'm just plain old Eddie Cobalt. I even picked out wallpaper yesterday. Impressive. See? I knew there was a human in there. Do you feel like you're being tracked, followed, or watched at home or outside? Well, I mean, we are two years into this damn pandemic, so outside is almost a far memory, but no. The only person watching me is Susan.

But no secret organizations or nefarious clandestine agents spying on you? Only the domestic kind. Do you still participate in online boards relating to conspiracy theories? Oh, I mean, not really. Eddie. I know, I shouldn't, but it's mostly just for a laugh now. I don't post much. It's easy to get bored stuck inside all the time. They are a trigger for you.

I'd hate to see you backslide. Okay, Doc. Scout's honor. No more hanging with the bad guys. Good. And how are things going with your wife? You know, two people stuck in a one-bedroom walk-up in East Harlem. Things could be better. The side effects aren't helping any. Loss of libido? Dead. Buried and decomposing at the moment. That also tends to get better with time. But there are other things that we can try to assist with that. I'll write you a script for a drug that may help.

Just make sure to let me know if you experience dizziness, uncontrolled defecation, vomiting, or skin reactions. Sounds sexy. I know how difficult all this has been since you were remanded to my care after your incident, but you've done remarkably well. I'm very pleased with how your recovery is progressing. I hope you are too. You've done good work, but this is when people begin to get overly confident and let things slip. I don't want to see you relapse. Ever vigilant. That's me. Good. Very good.

Next week then. It's a date. I'm back! Picked up dinner! You here? Of course I'm here. I'm always here. Where else would I go? You know this whole thing can't last forever. Did you know this apartment has 68 walls, 6 windows, 11 doors, but only 9 door handles? I do now.

Don't make that face. You get to actually go to work. So, speaking of work, the new Elton bot painting just came in at the gallery today. I brought it home so I could do a write-up. I just love it. Here, take a look while I plate the food. Bronzino from Cafe Eitri. Your favorite. Put it up on the mantel. Okay. What do you think?

Of what? Of the painting! He's brilliant, right? His use of color is out of this world. Eddie, you have one new message from an unknown number. Probably a robocall. Just erase it. Rexa, please read the message. The message reads: "Doubt can be the greatest gift in the world. Use it well." Emoji winking face. Dash, control X.

Control X? It's a dude from one of my boards, I think. How did he get your number? Who knows? A lot of people on them getting in some black hat shit. Black what? Never mind. I thought the doctor ordered you to stop using those sites. There are some serious creepers on there. Rexa, erase message. Erasing message. The power is out again. I told you we should have moved to that building in Williamsburg when we had the chance.

I'll get the candles and flashlights. That's better. Ooh, romantic. So? So what? Cabernet. You know me. So the painting, what do you think? I didn't even get to look. Hold on. What? Tell me. It's ugly.

Like an infant knocked over a can of paint then took a shit on the mess kinda ugly. It's not that bad. Vought is considered a visionary. By who? He's quite famous right now. Just had a write-up in Cura. We were lucky to get the piece. Bullshit. There's no way this finger painter is famous. No way. What? I said there's no way this painter could be that popular. What painter? Vought or whatever his name is. Who?

Are you stroking out on me right now? The painting you brought home. Did you take your medication today? Well, fuck me. Let me finish this fish and you are on. It was right here. Are you okay, babe? It's gone. Is this a joke? It's not funny.

Turn it off, babe. I'll still be measuring their dicks in the morning. I'm gonna watch a little while longer. Oh, so much doom and gloom.

preparing for war. The Pentagon has been closed-lipped about the possibility of things escalating, only stating that they were adequately preparing for all contingencies. The White House press secretary was unwilling to expand on the president's plans and only said that talks were continuing between the two countries. Thank you for joining us, Ms. Cobalt.

Sorry, I overslept the alarm. Yes, well, I'll catch you up. We all knew this was coming. And as we feared, corporate will be shutting down three more regional offices. But... We were spared the axe, but it means that the workload will be shifting our direction. This is ridiculous. Of course. We're already backlogged more than two months. Look, I know, but that's how things are.

We'll just have to make do. I don't fucking believe this. That language is inappropriate, Mr. Cobalt. Please keep your comments civil. How do they expect us to manage the caseload for three other offices? What do you mean? There's no way we can be expected to carry the whole eastern region. No one is asking you to. Then who is going to work all the extra claims? The people at the regional offices, as always.

But you just said they're being shut down. I knew this would happen. Calm down, everyone. None of the other offices are being shut down. How can you say that? Because I just got off with the regional manager and she was quite clear. You're right, Eddie. Okay, all right, get it together. At first, I thought I was having an episode.

Actually, I thought it was a slow burn aneurysm or some other short circuit in the gray mush. And now you don't. What changed your mind? You have one new message from Susan. Read it. Susan says, I know it's my turn, but can you go to the supermarket for me? Sad face emoji. I'm going to be stuck at the gallery late tonight. Wear a mask. Love you.

You think, in these instances, that somehow simply by believing things are different, they changed. Doubt. I don't follow. I doubt something, and, um, they don't change, per se. They cease to ever have been. Welcome. I just need to check your temperature. No fever, no problems. State policy. Uh, sure. You're all set. Thanks for shopping at Sharp's.

Where do I find the sanitizer? Sorry, we're out of here. What do you mean you're out? Grab the last can. Fine. What about the paper towels? It's really hard to say. We're having trouble getting orders from our suppliers. You can try that next week. Excuse me. Where's the milk? Thank you. Thank you for your cooperation.

You're gonna need to put a mask on. We have some up at the front if you don't have one. Go fuck yourself. It's a state mandate, sir. If you don't put a mask on, I need to ask you to leave. I'm not going anywhere. It's a free goddamn country. I need security to aisle 13. Got another one. I'm sick of your mandates. You want a muzzle... Security to aisle 13, please. All you effing libtard zombies. Hey, just put on a mask, asshole. Come and make me. Sir, come with me.

You think you can just push me around? In that moment watching it all happen, it just seemed so ridiculous. How could a modern society with all its money and technology let something so small bring us to our knees? I thought I was gonna die. I couldn't help myself. Maybe it was the stress, but I couldn't think of anything else to do but laugh. I doubted it was possible.

For one brief and fleeting moment, I ceased to believe it was all real. And so you believe you rewrote history, saving the world from this what? Superbug? Like what, Ebola? That killed thousands of people? Millions. A global pandemic. You know how this appears. Of course I do. But it's not what you think, I swear.

This is different. If this so-called pandemic killed millions of people, I mean, I'm sure I would have heard about it. Are you not listening? Of course you haven't. I erased it. It never happened. How could you know about something that never happened? Okay. Doc? What else do you believe that you have erased? Mind if I smoke? Of course you don't.

You're on the other end of the damn internet. Eddie, what else have you erased? Ever been to Hunt's Point? Can't say that I have. That's because it no longer exists, thanks to yours truly. Grey's Papaya? Nope. Hipsters? I'm proud of that one. I'm sorry, what? How about 9-11? Is that a band? See? Doubt is a funny thing. It doesn't have any rhyme or reason. It just happens. I'm not following. Well...

You'd think I'd be able to erase all the bad things that have ever happened, right? Just make them disappear and poof, the world's a much better place. But some things are just too true, you know? They are absolute. Fucking absolute.

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Fans make the network what it is. Thanks for listening, and we can't wait to hear from you. Find our listener survey at fableandfolly.com slash survey today. I'm home. One sec. Were you able to make it to the grocery store? Wow. Look at you. Bitch, put on a party dress. We are going out. I'm here to come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him come out my fuse and then I hear him

That was amazing. I haven't been dancing in forever. What are you talking about? We went to Output last month and Rachel's birthday party. Can I get you ladies anything? Do you have absinthe? Sorry. Absinthe? What is this, Bohemian Paris? You aren't even supposed to be drinking. I'm celebrating an artist's drink absinthe.

What do head case insurance adjusters drink then? We'll have two more lemon drops, please and thank you. I haven't seen you in here before. First time, but we will definitely be back. Then these are on me. Well, then make it top shelf. Anything for you, beautiful. Right? Thanks, love. When you are intoxicated, the mind goes interesting places.

It slips and slides. Things seem less tangible. Well, just less. Little things. Big things. Doubt pours like summer rain. Or shots of Patron. A wet mess that blurs everything. What were you doubting at the club? Waitresses, for one. It was only a look, of course. But a lot can be said in a look, you know?

Whole histories, epics, and believe me that bitch had intentions. Waitress. Yeah, that wanted to fuck my wife. And what's a waitress? Where are you? You're more than an hour late. Shit, slept through my alarm.

Give me 10 minutes and I'll sign in. Sign in? If you want to still have a job, you'll get your ASAP. The Hanscom policy needs to go out today. You know how important that account is? Get your ass down here. F me. Sorry. Yeah, I'll get there as soon as I can. After more than a year, riding the subway for the first time was a nerve-wracking experience. It's hard to shake something like that. You build habits.

Please remove the mask, miss. Why should I remove my mask? It's for my safety, officer. The subway has a no mask, no hoodie policy. That guy right there is wearing a hoodie. I said take it off. Sir, this is a surgical mask. Don't you understand how viruses work? There's a pandemic.

Well, there was, but that... I'm gonna need to see some IDs. I'm not gonna give you my ID. Dispatch, Unit 61, Service 3, downtown. Requesting backup at 86, car 6. I'm not doing anything wrong. Ma'am, this is your last warning. I'm giving you a lawful order. Take it off now. No, this is ridiculous. 61-1039, suspect resisting. Stand up and turn around now. Fine, I'm taking it off.

Why didn't you just doubt the cop out of existence? Like I said, some things are absolute. Eddie! You've finally decided to date us with your presence. Yep. Here. Sorry. I need the T-65B and RZ-1 forms for the Hanscom account in the next hour! You also never filed the ES/SF-1Bs! Right. I'll get those right away. Also, what's up with the mask? Uh, I have a cold. Has anyone told you you're weird? It makes me uncomfortable.

You should work on that too. I'll get right on that. Easy to forget how to be around people. Isolation becomes comforting. But this is what I wanted, right? Hundreds of co-workers sitting in neat rows in their tiny cubicle prison cells, shuffling through their meaningless routines, coughing, sneezing, laughing, talking, all their germs just swirling around in that central air conditioning.

I was halfway to a panic attack by the time I got to my desk. And how did you cope with that stress? About six Tylenol. And did your other coping mechanism show itself? Funny you put it that way. T-65B, RZ-1, SF-1B, and the endless stream of other bureaucratic bullshit. It all felt like gibberish in my throbbing mind.

Hard to believe anyone would make this shit so needlessly complicated, right? In fact, I cease to believe that there could be a hands-com account at all. Or any other accounts for that matter. Hey Eddie, I just wanted to say you are doing a great job. I am so sorry I was hard on you for being late. We all have those kind of days. So, the system is showing me an efficiency rating of 100%. Not a single outstanding order.

Not sure why I never noticed this before, but that stops right now. Thanks, I guess. Keep up the stellar work. You know what? Why don't we take an early lunch? I'd love to talk over some possible management opportunities with you. Welcome to Laverna Den. Do you have a reservation? Whoa, fancy. Simon Handrell for two. Ah, here you are. Are you sure this is fine?

This place is like 150 a plate. I want to show you the benefits of upper management. Parks galore. Follow me, please. We'll take your order at the counter. Then I'll show you to your table. A counter? How else would we order? Uh, yeah. Um, my bad. Do you like red wine? My head started to clear by the third glass. Pair of the dog. That dude loves to hear himself speak. Management this, management that.

Why is it these guys are always obsessed with executive washrooms? You feel that you are somehow unworthy of advancement because you believe you cheated using your, let's call it a power? Hell no. But there's no way I'd ever want to be an executive. Become a mindless corporate automaton? Can you imagine me a douche nozzle like Simon? The question is, can you? That'll be $36.50. Keep the change.

I love New York! I get a rush every time I see the Twin Towers. On that we can agree. You never realize how much you miss them until they're like right there. Kind of magical. You are good people, Eddie Kobold. Why thank you. You aren't so bad as yourself.

Once you've thrown a few back, that stick slides right out. I know, right? Still not interested in the job though. I get it. This company is shit. The best thing about it is the bathroom. How did we get here? Deep, Komalt. Komalt. Komalt. What a cool word. It just makes your mouth feel good.

I wanted to be a veterinarian. I always guessed you were a cat person. Six. Guilty as charged. You? I don't know. I know what I didn't want to be. An insurance adjuster? One of those people who put on a show anywhere they can and feel like they belong. It's like layers upon layers of lies, all to appeal to some unwritten standard of... I don't even know what I'm trying to say. I just never wanted to be...

Like, not the real me. Well, it's real anyway. Money is real. Life is real. Life needs money. It's just how it is. Yeah, I guess. You ever doubt the meaning of it all, though? Hm? You are drunk. Yep. It's hard to believe we have to go back to the office. What would we do without it? Am I right?

I need to go. Do you think it's a flash mob?

So the building was gone. There were thousands of people just sort of milling around, confused, in a giant empty lot where the Vista Insurance building was supposed to be. I didn't mean for it to happen. It just sort of popped in there, you know? All those people lost their jobs because of me.

I hate it, that corporate soul-sucking job, but I never wanted to. It's not your fault. How can you say that? Of course it's my fault! It's all my fault! You need to help me. How do I stop this? Brain chemistry is not really something we have power over, but let's start with just attempting to calm down and breathe. So you believe me? I believe you believe. I'm telling you I'm out of control. What did you do next?

I went home. I think I knew that this was coming for a long time. Unstoppable, like a prey train. Deep down, you know? But you just sort of ignore the signs. Tell yourself that your suspicions are unfounded. Yes! Oh my god! Eddie, baby! You said she'd be out all day. You should go. Yeah. This is... I'll just get my thing.

No. Eddie, look, I know this is a shock, but it isn't what it looks like. That line, Susan and I haven't been what I'd call okay in a while. I think obviously the pandemic put stress on us being stuck in a bubble of two. Well, it did, you know, before it didn't, I guess. Honestly, I have no clue what's going on with us, except in that moment, in the shock, couldn't believe she used that line.

The one from every bad soap opera or romantic comedy you've ever seen when someone gets caught in the act. This isn't what it looks like. Baby, let's just talk about it, okay? How did you resolve the situation? I wanted to punch and kick and scream. Say something! I just stood there, trying to work it out. Trying to understand. It seems like I should just go. No. Stay. You know what?

I can't do it anymore. You pushed me to this. You know how hard it is to stay with someone who is always so goddamn cynical? Nothing is good enough or real enough. It's all just misery. There is no joy in you. It's like this fucking rain cloud lives above your head raining just on you. I can't even imagine how miserable it must be in that head of yours. And I'm tired of trying. Fucking say something!

Don't just stand there! Fucking say something! And just like that, she was gone. All that was left was the ache. Gone as in you'd never met? Never fell in love? Gone as in it's simply impossible that a heartless bitch like that ever existed.

I hope you enjoyed this presentation. If you liked this episode, please check out our brand new After Show, produced live by our partner FNFunny Productions on their Twitch channel the night each episode releases. The podcast version of the After Show will then be released on this feed each Tuesday of our off week.

If you haven't yet, please make sure to subscribe for free on the podcast platform of your choice and rate us with five stars today. If you like the podcast, leave us a review and connect with us on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook under the handle at CM Anthology. Or check us out online for more information at CuriousMatterPodcast.com.

This episode was dramatized, directed, and edited by me, your host, Jonathan Pezza. Casting assistance was provided by Sandeep Parikh, Anand Shah, and Jeff Winkler.

Tonight's show starred Kelly Dawn Hancock as Eddie Cobalt, Jeff Lewis as Simon, Amy Vorpel as Susan, and Sundeep Parikh as the psychologist. Our talented ensemble also includes the voices of Jonathan Adleman, Jason Ervin, Philip Gray, Thien Nguyen, Jeremy Pezza, Jonathan Pezza, Blythe Renee, Melissa Star Cummings, and Ali Rivera Quinonez.

The score was provided by Epidemic Music. The Uncanny Eddie Cobalt is a work in the public domain and was produced in accordance with U.S. copyright law. Curious Matter Anthology is produced by the Knightsville Workshop in association with FNFunny Productions.

Copyright Knightsville Workshop 2022. All rights reserved. Coming up on the next episode, we pick right back up with the epic conclusion of the uncanny Eddie Cobalt. You don't want to miss it. So make sure to subscribe for free today. And thank you for listening. The Fable & Folly Network, where fiction producers flourish.

Dum Dums and Dice would like to welcome you into The Mythos Mysteries, a live play pulp Cthulhu podcast where improvisers and comedians venture into dangers beyond their wildest imagining. Our story begins with two erstwhile companions on a long and winding road.

They think they are fleeing danger, but greater horror awaits them when they arrive. For they are not just running away from mortal danger, but towards the Mythos Mysteries.

Whoever you are, we're not scared of you. You hear a voice from inside that says, please help. I'm inside the dresser. Help. Now I need you to listen to my very explicit instructions here, Adrian. Okay. Please ready your punching fists. Yeah, they're always ready. Now I'm going to open the door. Okay. And we're going to look inside the dresser. What if we don't? Could we not? I need you to be brave for me. Okay.

You were always very brave. Okay, okay. So we're going to open the door and you're going to look in the dresser and then what? And then if I tell you to, we're going to punch it. The dresser? No.

He said I had to be very... He said explicit. If there is someone in the dresser... I'm punching. We're going to punch him. What if it's a ghost? Well, then we're going to have ourselves a fun time. Like a party? Like a birthday party. Okay, so we'll do some dancing and there will be a cake. Hopefully the ghost brought it. Yes. Okay, I can do this. Okay. I'm going to...

I'm going to open the door now. Okay. I'm going to open the door. You open the door and the dresser is back upright. All the drawers are back inside. But now it is next to the window and the bed is in a different corner. Of course it is. And the blood is pooling on the floor instead of the ceiling. It's dripping up. The Mythos Mysteries episodes are available now.