Da Cousin Bella Poarch
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The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Bratman to Earth, Earth to Bratman. Girl, you already know who it is. Happy New Year again. Pshh, pshh, pshh.

Marigayang bagong taon, everybody. Marigayang bagong taon, everybody. We got our Tagalog on today. I wonder why. Girl, let's cut to the chase. We have a very special guest today. She is very much our adoptive cousin. Basically our cousin now. I see her more than my actual cousins, actually.

Miss Kaylee, would you like to introduce our very first guest ever here at the Baddest Podcast? Of course. Who is it? You're supposed to introduce... Miss Bella?

Okay, Galinda. She said, it's good to see me, isn't it? That's what she says to the munchkins. Isn't it? We got Bella Porch, everyone. Bright and yellow. How was your trip here, girl? It was cute.

If anyone was wondering, this is our second time filming with Bella because Lord knows what happened to the very first one. - Why? What happened to it? - I guess like the audio, no, no, no. The audio was good, but the video wasn't. And I was like, girl, I don't want to mess up our very first guest. And I-

And I don't know how, but Bella literally came to Hawaii back in a week. So she went home. When did you go home? For Christmas. She went home for Christmas. 24th. Yeah, the 25th because she was here for the 24th. And now she's back on the 2nd. And I was like, girl, let's reshoot that shit. I know. It's like you never left. Yeah. No, I'm always here. Honestly, her presence is always here, girl. Welcome back. Welcome back. Thank you. How was your New Year's? It was really cute.

Oh, yeah. Period. It's really cute, actually. Did you eat grapes under the table this year? No, I don't. Honestly, I didn't have to. Why? Why not?

Cuz. Cuz. Cuz I'm out. She didn't have to eat grapes. She's healthy. I'm independent. Yeah. Exactly. Like, I honestly, yeah. And I manifest all year. Like, it's not just on New Year's. Let me take a break. Actually, she said, I can eat grapes whenever I want. Not just New Year's. Because you bitches, y'all be doing that. Period. Okay, Bella. You better read me, girl. So as you guys know...

So as you guys know, Bella is always here in Hawaii. And whenever she is here, she is literally living in my attic. And I'm sure you guys saw her feeding her chickens in her recent videos. Girl, because I'm like, girl, I got to put my cousins to work. You don't just get to live in my attic for free, girl. You got to feed my chickens. You got to do some chores. Literally. How was feeding my chickens? Honestly, they were so cute.

Except for the part where I was singing and they just all ran away. Yeah, they're not very a high-pitched girl. They're more like a... They're not really a... Girls, they're more of a... Girls. Speaking of chicken, because I really don't want this to be a super...

interviewee type of interview because you already have so many interviews. I kind of want to just have like a really chill conversation with you. So with that being said, did you ever have chickens in the Philippines? Yes, I grew up in a farm, girl. Like we had chickens, we had sheeps, goats, cows. Do you remember their names? I think...

Not the chickens. But I know like... The main like... Sheeps and goats. We had like Elvis. We had... Priscilla. Love. No. Filipinos be doing that girl. My sister's name princess. Because Princess Diana. Wait. Actually. Yes. Like girl. Like...

Like Princess Diana? Like Princess Diana. My mom said she's named Princess because Princess Diana. Because she was like apparently like the Kim Kardashian at the time. Like she was the it girl. Oh, yeah. Back in the day. So there's a lot of Filipino princesses. Ivor is named after Iverson, which is my brother's favorite. Iverson James, basketball player. Filipinos just be naming everything, girl. And Bretman is from? Bret the Hitman and The Rock. Like, girl. Where is Bella Porch from?

I named myself. Yeah. Did you have like... Were you named... Did you name yourself after Bella the princess? Yes. Actually, Belle. Oh. Because she wears a yellow dress. And as you can see, my favorite color is yellow. And yeah, her name was Belle. And she was in love. With a beast. With a beast. Are you in love with a beast right now? Wait, is that where they created bestiality? What? Wait, what? I think so. I've never actually thought of that. Now that I...

Cause that's basically it Beast was an animal girl Yeah bestiality But like he's a prince Like he's a prince that turned into a beast So it was like a curse But Belle was fucking on the beast No they were They were kissing Well that begs the question Is Tiana a furry? Cause she kissed a frog Or is she a reptiliary?

I don't know. Is that a thing? What? I don't know, girl. Is that a thing? We're just asking questions here. Yeah. Is Tiana a furry because she kissed the frog? Oh my God. The world will never know. The frog is not a furry animal. That's what I'm saying. Is she a...

Reptilianry You never know because sometimes no like someone might hear me out I'm like that snake would feel really good in me You know? Not that I wait hold on I didn't mean to say that I think of that Okay okay well even if I did a cobra come in me

I'd rather have the rattlesnake. And rattle all at me. Girl, that's nasty. Bella. Speaking of hear me out. Do you have a hear me out? I don't. Like. I'm thinking. Think of it. Yeah. Let's do a little hear me out. I mean Beast from like Beauty and the Beast. No, he really is. He's daddy. He's giving daddy. Mm.

Like a bear. Yeah. No, speaking of, like, I swear, like, I used to have a crush because I was Aladdin for my third grade drama, obviously. You had a crush on the monkey. And I had a crush on Jafar, but nobody ever talks about Jasmine's tiger. Like, girl. Jasmine's tiger's a little fruity. That's what I'm saying. I'm like, girl, that's a girl.

Do you have... Hear me out, Bella. Buzz. Buzz Lightyear. I'm more of a Woody's girl. I love me a cowgirl. Cowboy, you know? Yeah, Buzz. Why? Because I just realized how hot he was until like...

I was playing this game, this mobile game, Brawl Stars. And like I was playing. Oh yeah, he's in there. Oh, he's in there. Yeah. No free promos for Brawl Stars. Y'all want a promo? Hit me up. Me too. Wait, so you're a gamer nowadays? Girl, I've always been. I know. Phone gamers. You play Brawl Stars. I do from time to time. Yeah. I kind of got my obsession out of the way because I was like literally obsessed with it.

What is Brawl Stars? Can you enlighten me, Barilla? Because I've never... I don't know. I'm grown, so I don't do that shit. It's like a multiplayer game where you can compete with other people and then you get characters. And by doing that, it's like you just have to kill each other like brawl. Yeah. Oh, work. Yeah, it's really cute. Is it like Plants vs. Zombies type? No. No.

See, because that was the last time I played games. Like Farmville? It's more of like a shooting game where like you have to kill each other and then you have to be the last man standing. Yeah. Speaking of gaming, remember Bella, remember during COVID days when we would, when we had our gaming era? Among Us. And we would play Among Us with Ray them. Shout out to Ray and Pokimane. We miss y'all.

I don't know why I brought that up. I was just like reminiscing on the last time I was playing games. Yeah. Speaking of, I forgot. Miss K. What? Do you have anything for Miss Cafe? Oh, yeah, I do. We have matcha freezes today with strawberry syrup. And they're lactose free because... What is a matcha freeze even? It's a combination of ice, ice cream, and matcha with strawberry syrup.

There you go. Oh my God. Did you make this because you knew I liked matcha? Yes, yes. And then Brett just told me that he can't have coffee, so best of both worlds. You ate. The last time Bella was here, we went to go visit you. Yeah, she got a matcha from us. You get strawberry matcha. Strawberry matcha. Made by yours truly. It was so good. But, okay, wait. No, speaking of farm. What is your tea of the week? My tea of the week is not really a tea. It's like a fun fact for everybody out here. Oh, tell me.

Do you know why a piggy bank is called a piggy bank? Are you talking about the piggy bank when you're saving money or a piggy bank when someone's on your back and you're piggy backing them? Saving money. Oh, I'm gonna really take a good guess at this. What? Piggy's back. No. Piggy's bank. Piggy bank. Is it because... Well, piggy banks hold coins and small money. No. Oh.

Great guess though. Hit me up. Tell me, tell me. No, but they were made because they used to piggy banks are made from this clay called piggy. Oh. Yes. So back then they would use that clay to make like banks of coins. And then that's how they started calling it piggy bank. Hmm.

Okay, work. That's all. Where did you learn that? From a 10-year-old. And I was like, where did you get that? And she's like, my teacher. Wow. She got citations and resources. Yes. I love that. I love like a little fun fact. Yeah. I've never thought about that before. So I was like sharing it with you guys. Oh, thank you. Bella, do you have any like weird fun facts that you know? Weird fun facts? Or like, you know, just some random fun facts. Random fun facts? Yeah.

Like an average bee can live up to like 35 days to a month.

Average B. Yeah. Can live up to 35 days to a month. Oh, and they die after they sting, right? So like I was, I was trying to figure that out because I love the B movie. I love that movie. I was just thinking that their, their romance was only like for a month. That's bestiality too. For a month. It's giving 90 day fiance. It's giving 30 day fiance. Yeah. I was, yeah. So I was just kind of sad when I found out that they die after 30 days. So what I'm hearing is you love for,

furry beastiality movies. It's giving that. You love movies where there are relationships with animals and beasts? That's what I'm hearing. No, but like I love beasts because they're yellow. And I love yellow. And you're Queen Bee. And I'm also...

I'm gold actually. You are giving B. You are giving B right now. And it's funny because like… Imagine her name is Bila. No, some people call me that. No, that's how they call… Like when I went to Italy, that's how people were calling me. They go, Bila, Bila, Bila. Yeah. And I was like, wait, you're calling… Like me? Yeah.

it's Bella but yeah they say Bila porch it's M to the Bila but yeah do you have like a fun fact a fun fact that I always remember is do you know when you dye your hair and your teeth actually still grows when you dye yeah yes your hair and your teeth still continues to grow not like forever but like

I think it's like for like two more days. Teeth still grows? Well, I guess. Somebody said that. Like your teeth and your hair still like is developing even if you die. Like you never like. Like actually? Bitch, okay girl. Who the fuck? I don't know. I love how nobody questioned y'all fucking facts and y'all wanna be fucking like. No, because I'm like if you knock out a teeth, it doesn't grow back. It just stays missing. Well girl, my source is a Snapple.

The Snapple fact. Oh, Snapple. And I'm pretty sure they never lied. That's a very reliable source of fun facts. Is it true, Kat? No. Wait, is mine true, Kat? It's not true. So what does it say? So I lied. So Snapple. So Snapple, girl, bitch. Okay, I'll think of a new for fun fact.

What's up, everyone? I'm Sheena Shea. You may know me from nine seasons of Bravo's Vanderpump Rules, but I'm here to tell you about my podcast called Shenanigans. We talk about everything from reality TV, pop culture, relationships, parenting, and invite you to join the conversations with Q&A sessions where nothing is off the table. There's so much more I want to share with you. Thanks for listening and make sure to subscribe to Shenanigans to stay up to date with new episodes every Friday.

Oh, let me read my journal entry. That's a fun fact. The tea. I will read to you guys my New Year's entry. Also, I got a new journal you guys will see on the next episode. It's so cute, see? Also, I will read you guys and show you guys the entry that I had for Bella's episode that got deleted.

because it's cutesy. I put 010125. Happy New Year. So many things were happening yesterday. Other than New Year's Eve, my little niece Cleo was over where we found out she's a big sister yet again. My sister showed me her birth video, her birthing video and Lele literally just slid right out. It was nasty and cool and I never want to see it again.

Today, my 75 hard challenge begins and I'm very excited. I wrote the rules on the next page so I can keep track and keep myself accountable.

It takes a few days for me to fully kick in into the new year mode, but I really do feel like 2025 will be the bestest year yet. And it's going to be filled with so much love, so much traveling, so much money making moves, so many big career moves. My face is going to be clear. My body will be tea. My hair will be silky. My ass will be fat. And most importantly, I'm going to be in my bag.

Are there any things you guys are looking forward to in the new 2025? Honestly, no adventures.

Yeah, I love how you change adventure to travels girl because I know you're about to say travel and you're always talking about travel here bitch. Okay, we're traveling this year you guys. We're going back home. Yes. We're gonna go fucking interrupt Bella's trip in the Philippines. Bella, talk to us about your 2025 plans because bitch, she got land. Oh, I'm busy. But the first things first, I will be traveling back home to the Philippines. Homecoming. Yeah. Yeah.

Is there anything we should look forward to when I crash it specifically? Performing. Oh my god, are you gonna perform my ass up? I don't know about performing, maybe. Or showing up. I'm definitely gonna be a guest. I will be showing up and then I will be collaborating with a group. And I'm not gonna say it. Bella might bring back the Sex Bomb Girls. That would be so good.

Oh my god, that was so cute. You actually introduced me to that. I think Miss K was actually convinced she was a sex bomb when we were kids. I really was. Oh, that's so cute. Do you know how to do the spaghetti pa-ba-ba? Yes, probably. There's like a video of me out there from like my mom's wedding just dancing that. Eating everybody up. With the split and everything. Even Miss K would eat my splits up because she could do the splits this way and

And this way. Wait, can you still do a split? No. Girl, it was like our... It was like our party trick. Like every party we'd be like, guys, we know how to do the split. Come over here. Yeah. No, Miss K and I, we were so convinced we were part of...

Desi Shete Sex Bomb oh my gosh yes the teleserie do you remember Wawawee yes and they also had dancers what were they called they were called the Wawawee dancers but I remember their name Luningning there's Luningning Mariposa Mariposa

I don't remember their names. That is so niche. I feel like I'm so sorry for those people who don't understand the last three minutes of our conversation. But they're like dancers in the Philippines. They were like always put up against each other because one was with ABS-CBN and one was GMA. And now nobody gives a fuck because they're all together.

Yeah. They were just like the eight girls. Like the first girl group. They were. I'm very excited for your Philippine trip. Are you going home? Yeah, I'm going home. Because you're a Pangasinan queen. Yeah, so I'm going to go to Pangasinan. I'm going to go visit my old school. And just like my hometown and meet up with a couple of friends that I... And brother. Oh yeah, my brother's in Pampanga. So I'm just going to meet him there. And then he's going to be traveling with me. Would you like to tell them our niece fun fact?

Or what? We both have. Oh, yeah. This is how I know stars align, girl. So like I have a niece and her name is Cleo, which is one year older than Princesses Cleo. Right. From the Philippines. Yeah, from the Philippines. And it's your older sister? My oldest sister. Yeah. Yeah. This one's my younger sister and I named her Cleo. Like that's so weird.

Wow, you have an older sister? And we're not, and Sanchez Miraca is not too far from Pangasinan. Maybe like a couple hours. Yeah. And it's like, yeah, it's like the province area. Pangasinan is in Lugano too, right? Yeah. Pangasinan is there.

They say ngae at the end of their sentence. What is ngae? Or ngarud. What? Ngarud. Ngarud, right? Yeah, ngarud. Yeah. Ngarud. What are you most excited about when you go home? What is the first thing Belinda Marie is doing? Oh my god. I'm gonna go get me some street food.

Because I haven't had good Kikyum. You're a Kikyum girl. No, but honestly, girl, their fishball right now is so different. Wait, really? It's like kind of different now. Like what do you mean? Maybe because we're older. I think it looks the same and everything, right? Yeah. But when we were eating it, it didn't hit like how it hit when we were kids. Yeah.

Like I think it's just like how they make it now is just more different. I don't know. I think it's just we're getting older and maybe our taste buds are like changing but I was like, oh, period. Do you like balut? Yes. Do you eat the chicken part? Yes. I eat everything except for the white part. We should do a balut mukbang. Oh!

I love balut. Do you have balut right now? No, I don't. But they sell at Seafood City. And you're here for a couple more days. I'll bring some balut when I come. I'm eating those. You don't eat balut? No, I think it's a crime. She hates eggs. Oh, you do? Yes. But like the chick is not an egg. It's a chick. No. That makes it worse.

It was alive at once. Yes. But then they took it away and put it in the oven or like the boiling water. I can't help it though because my mom had cravings on it when she was having me as a baby. That's why I'm the only fucking hairy person in my family. That makes so much sense. You have really nice eyelashes and eyebrows and hair. Yeah, I call them feathers. These are my feathers, girl. I have a nice set of flock. What is that called? Lihian? Lihian?

Naglilihing. Naglilihing is when you're pregnant. Do you know yours? Yeah. Do you know what your mom had lihing on you when she... No. Period. Maybe a doll. Ooh. With the eyes. You do give munyaka vibes. We also have a cousin who had an ex whose mom lihied on a doll. And she literally looked like a doll. Like a doll. Like she hated dolls. Because when you lihi something, you only not love it. It kind of turns out to look like you. Yeah. Mine says a crab. Crab? Yeah. So I like...

Oh, you like to like... Touching stuff. Yeah. Rubbing my feet. She has like a texture thing with her feet. Yeah. She can't sleep until... Unless there's like... A little texture. Like this kind of texture. Wait, really? Against rubbing my feet. Yeah. So what do you like put on your feet at night? Like a little mesh bag. That's so cute. Yeah. I bring it everywhere with me. Or you know like those like... You know how in the glass doors, they have like a net thing? Yeah.

Yeah. A sliding net thing. She would rip the net thing from the glass doors and like use that to up her feet. I don't know why. Oh wow. It just feels nice. Okay. Do you have any weird quirks that you've been doing? I feel like I'm just weird in general. To your lifestyle. I think the weirdest thing about me that people find really weird is that I don't invite people over to my place.

I've never been. That's not weird at all. Yeah. That is not weird. That's not weird at all. Yeah. I'm very... It's not that I don't invite people to my place. I'm very picky with who I invite to my place. I have to like love you. Like I have to like... I know my sign is like... Not my sign but like up to my attic there's a lot of people that sign it but I know everybody's signature. I know everyone there. I know every... Like you know. Yeah. Like I have to know you because like my space is sacred and I'm sure that's how you feel about yours too. Yeah. I don't know. I just feel like

I feel like a cat sometimes. I'm very territorial. And I don't want people in my space. Yeah. I love that. I was gonna ask, is there any weird quirks about Bella Porch though? As like a singer slash… Like what do you do pre-shows that maybe are weird? What do you do when you're writing that maybe is weird? Like your writing process? I'm always snacking on honey before a show. Yeah, you… Yeah, I have like packets of manuka. I always have packs of manuka honey to just like eat.

Is it like a comfort thing? Or is it like actually like a technical like… What you got used to? Well, my vocal coach told me it's good to like… For my voice. To like lubricate my voice and like… Yeah. It just helps. But also I just love honey. Like I've always been like a honey girl. Like I put honey in my coffee or like my matcha. Or just eat it. And I just eat it. By herself period. Oh, you're so bee coded. I know. It is kind of weird because I've always been obsessed with honey. She got famous from like a song called The Bee.

M to the B. Yeah, it's kind of weird, right? And then I feel like in my past life, I was a B. I'm surprised you don't have a B tattoo. Because I'm the B. You are the B tattoo. Yeah. Period. She is the queen B. Yeah. Period. Miss K, do you have any questions, girl? Oh, before that, actually, let me show y'all the entry of last week that I didn't get to show y'all. And the cookies. Period. I'll do that after. Please. Please.

So on the deleted episode, I showed Bella the last time. The first time she slept over my house, we drew each other because she told me she draws. And I was like, girl, please. So we both gave each other one minute to draw each other. Excuse me. Self-portrait. And girl, let me just show you how talented this queen is. Not a lot of people know I draw. Like that's something I keep...

Secret with everyone. Even like on my socials, like you never really see my drawings. - Secret talent. Okay so I'm gonna cover mine first because it's embarrassing.

But this is what Bella drew of me in one minute. Beautiful, cutesy, and I was very detailed, very demure. See, and this was her. She had her eyes closed. You know, I got the pony though. The pony is eating. The leg up is eating. The leg up, like don't play with me. And her phone on the side. Were you always an artistic kid? Yes.

What did you do in Pangasinan? Like, how did you get your artistic-ness out when you were in Pangasinan in your little bukid? I mean, I used to draw on banana leaves. Because it stains. There was like a summer where my parents, well, the first summer, my parents got rid of all the paper in the house, including books, notebooks, and everything that I could draw on. And I know why. Because I just love drawing. Like, I was drawing on any paper I saw.

But... But why did they... Sorry. But why did they see that as a negative thing that you drew? Like, why did they... Because they only wanted me to focus on academics and not, like, you know... Because in school, I would... In school, I would also join, like, poster making contests or, like, any drawing contest. And I would always win gold. And, like... I know. But...

As you should. But I was, you know, I was winning gold on singing but also on drawing. But so, I would always draw on like banana leaves. Because you know you can draw on like banana leaves, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. I love that. Did you have people to play with?

No. It was just you and your brother. Yeah. Me and my brother would just like play. Because I remembered my life in the Philippines. All my neighbors were like my playmates and we would meet up at the court. And Miss Kay's life was probably more similar to yours where like not a lot of kids were around you. I wasn't. Your best playmates was when I would come around. Yeah. Or when it was your brother. Neighbors or like school. Yeah.

I mean, I guess for me, we had a lot of animals. So I would just play with my dogs and my cats and like the goats and the sheeps and the cows. Love that. Yeah. We didn't have farms, but we had a pig. Aww. But they were just there for like... Food? Yeah. Speaking of food, what is the cat cooking? Meow.

So I made monster cookies, but I did like s'mores. So inside is marshmallow. Monster cookies. And, you know, the graham cracker at the bottom. And then instead of regular chocolate, I did this Reese's peanut butter chocolate. Okay, girl. Oh my gosh. We should share with the live studio audience as well. You guys look. Is it good, studio audience? It's really good. We have Luis Lomanzano today at the end.

Not to be confused with Kevin Aoki. She's good. It's like chewy. So good. I love it. Thank you, Cati. That was good. Bella, what are your plans while you're in town? Like in the Philippines? Girl, no. In Hawaii. Oh, I'm going to do the Coco Head hike. With me. Yeah, with you. I'll be there. Because I used to do that hike all the time. And then I'm going to do the pillbox. Because I used to live… Lanikai?

The one around here. Oh, the Waianae one? Yeah. Wait, let's talk more. I feel like, because I do watch a bunch of your interviews, I feel like you rarely talk about your lifestyle here in Hawaii when you were living here. What was like your day-to-day life when you were living in Waianae? Right after I got out of the military, I would take the bus to Ala Moana from Waianae. Really? So it would take me. Girl. That's crazy.

You would take E or 42? Or C. I think 42. Or no, C. There's a 40. Oh, C. I don't think 42 comes in. I think C is the one. C is the one that comes in. Yeah. There's 42. 42.

But yeah. So you took C. So you got to town and… So you got out of work… Like two hours. Like two hours. Oh my god. But I loved it because I got to like just listen to like music for hours. I guess. Yeah. And people left me alone. Like it was… I looked very… Like my hair was always down. I honestly… Like I just let my curls out and I felt like… Yeah. They were like, oh I'm just another lovable girl. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

What would you do in Alamana? Or Alamana or Rikiki? Where would you go? Alamana. Period. What would your ass do there? Sometimes my friend would like invite me to lunch. So we would go to the pho place at the mall. Where's the spots? What's the spots? I forgot the pho in the mall. There's a pho on the very… Is it the food court or the top? No, the top. Tanaka or something? Right next to Jen. Right next to Jen. I know…

I know. Is it Ramen House? No. No. It's literally right next to that cooking place. The Yakiniku place. Yeah. Yeah. I know what you're talking about. I just can't. I don't know the name. I ate there before. Yeah. But that place is really good. It's really, really good. But yeah, honestly, I just hung out with my friends. And yeah. And I was also looking for like a part-time job at the time. Did you? I wanted to be like a receptionist at like a salon. Oh.

Why? That's so niche. Why? Because I don't know. I just thought it was cute. Wait, other than the military, do you have any other jobs? Before the military, when I was 16, I was a Target employee. Oh, really? I did not know that. Oh, not here. Not here in San Antonio, Texas when I was 16. How was it at Target? It was really fun. You get like 20% off like as an employee discount. Yeah. That's low. Yeah.

I know, but at that time, come on. Oh, I get it. I was like, a lot. Yeah. Well, did you know about the Target lore of like, they actually keep tabs of like, if you steal something and if you steal a certain amount of like, worth, that's when they...

I think it was like $1,000. Yeah, I think it's like $1,500 actually, right? Yeah. Do you have other like, oh my God, I need to know, I need to know, I need to know. Because I feel like on TikTok, I see a lot where like, I just got fired at Sephora. Here's what I know. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Is there any target lures? No. Honestly, I was too young. Like I couldn't even work past like 4 p.m. because I was underage. Oh, okay. So they were very strict and I could only work

Up to like a certain hours per week. Like six, five hours? Yeah, so I was making like $300 a month. Period. Enough to buy lipstick. Yeah, no, I was buying like cosplay stuff. Yeah, because I loved cosplay. What was your first cosplay costume? It was Hinata. Who that? Hinata. Hinata from Naruto. Which one is that? Which one is that?

Bitch, Naruto? Well, I know Naruto, but bitch, which one in Naruto? Is that the pink hair girl? No, it was the girl with the bangs with the white pupils. With the... Naruto's wife. Guys. He had a wife? Naruto had a wife? Oh my god. Wait, I stopped watching after a while. Like here, I'll show you what she looks like. She's really cute. Hinata. I think the last Naruto memory I know is when they had a...

Isn't she cute? Okay, yes. We know her. Oh, the blind girl. They ended up together? Yeah, and I have a huge crush on Neji, which was her brother, but they killed him on the show. I was so annoyed. Justice for Neji. A moment of silence for Neji. You will be missed. Thank you, Neji, for your service. So you did cosplays and...

While working at Target. And then you went to the military. I joined the military at 17. So I was like really waiting for my 17th birthday. And was Hawaii your first base? No, my first duty station is in Japan for two years. Oh, okay. And I was there. Like I was an hour train ride from Tokyo. So I was always there every weekend if I wasn't deployed. You must have loved it. Oh, I loved it so much. From like cosplay to like going there. I love it. How far did you live from the city?

Tokyo? Yeah. Yeah, an hour train ride. Oh, you said that already? Yeah. I was like, wait. Yeah. Yeah.

Sorry, you should be talking so fast. Oh, was I talking so fast? No, you weren't. I just didn't pay attention in that specific sentence. She was like, oh yeah, I used to live in Tokyo. I was an hour away. And I'm like, so how far were you from the town? This is why we don't do guests. Like the worst interviewer girl. And then after Japan, Korea? No. So, I mean, we would go like to different ports like when we are on deployment.

So in Japan, I was deployed with the USS Ronald Reagan. It's like an aircraft carrier. I don't know what that is. And it's a huge ship that can hold up to 5,000 people. And it carries like jets, helicopters, and like a lot of… Would you ever perform as Bella Porch in that plane?

That'd be so cunt, like a private plane in the ship with 5,000 people. Thank you, 5,000 guests. Honestly, yeah. Like a tribute to the troops. Yeah, honestly. Yeah. Who did a music video that's a tribute to the troops? Was it Christina Aguilera? Wait, really? Candyman. Oh, yes. Yes. That's really cute. Did you know she sampled the Andrew Sisters for that? She sampled Boogie Boogie Bugle Boy.

He was a famous trumpet man from a Chicago way. He had a boogie set but no one else could play. He was a chop man at his clamp. Wow, you really know. Oh girl, my mom. Well, we had a lot of like, I listened to a lot of like old Hollywood shit because my grandma in the Philippines would always have it on the TV because that was the only fucking channel they had during like Baguio season. It was like black and white. That's how I know like Streetcar Named Desire, Marlon Brando and all that stuff.

because that's all the channels we would have during Baguio season did you ever have to experience Baguio season in the Philippines? yeah it was very like where we live girl is so bad yeah like northern part of Luzon is always very like typhoon season and stuff that's where I experienced my first earthquake

Damn. Back in the Philippines. What was you like? Were you like, damn, this shit is shaking? Girl, yeah, I was. I was like, what the heck is happening? Why is all the walls and like things from the wall was like coming off? Were you scared?

No. It was just like, what is happening? Yeah. Yeah, you didn't really understand. Yeah, yeah. Because I didn't know what earthquake was. Do you have any like fond memories of like Philippines as a kid? I think my grandma. Tell me about her. Her name was Lola Unang. So I was with her before I was like adopted.

So I've only like... I've only... Yeah. I was only with her for a little bit. But I just remember... Oh my gosh. Wait. So we were like so poor. She wouldn't have enough money to buy...

Toothpaste Was very like She was into like Dental hygiene Like she was always clean And I felt like Now As an adult Like I'm always like Flossing every after Like meals and stuff Like I always take care Of my teeth Like that's something I Yeah I remember And I can delete this If you want But I remember You were telling me You were dating someone

No we should add this They didn't have a floss in their house Yeah And you were like Bye Yeah Cause you had asked them for a floss And you were like Like how do you How do you go to bed Without flossing your teeth

like i literally imagine the plaque that's like yeah no when i eat out at like restaurants like i would excuse like after and we love a good korea barbecue girl yeah i oh i literally i will show you in my bag right now i have floss in my bag because after i eat at a restaurant i would excuse myself and i would floss in the bathroom that's hot that is so cute that's cute i need to start implementing that in my life actually i have zero cavities

Girl. Not to flex, but... My seventh grade self is screaming because Gi, let me tell you, I went one time, she said six. With silver teeth? No, I didn't have silver teeth, but I had silver fillings. Oh, okay, okay. I didn't have silver teeth, girl.

But congrats, I guess. Like, you just think you're fucking better than everyone. Zero plaque. Thank you. Zero plaque, zero cavity. No, but, like, I love my grandma. Like, that's— Honestly, that's the funniest memory I have. Because she's, like— Wait, would you ever write a song about her? I did, actually. Will we ever hear it? Yes. Will the world ever hear it? It's gonna come out. Like, right now?

It's not out yet, but it's going to come out when my album is out. She used to mix Bear Brands. You know Bear Brands? Oh, yeah. Bear Brands are my favorite. Oh, my God. Bear Brands and Nido. Because, of course, we didn't have much. So, like, she would always make me...

Like rice? Like steaming hot rice? I know. Exactly. She sprinkles a little bit of sugar and then she puts the bear bread on top and I would eat it up. Like that shit was so good. That was a meal. It was so good. That sounds so good. My mom would do the same but with Milo. Milo.

And then our grandmother... This was already when we were in Hawaii. I don't know why we were eating this. And we weren't even... Well, we were so broke in the Philippines and in Hawaii. But remember when she would make us baguong with a little bit of oil and rice? That was mine. That's good. She would do rice, sprinkle baguong, and oil. And you would like kirug it. Yeah. It's so good. Do you have other pobrecita food that you used to like? I mean, the...

The egg with the tomatoes? With the salt? The egg. What is it called? The salty egg? Yeah. The red egg? Yes. It's duck egg, right? I think it's duck egg. It's duck egg. It's duck egg that they soak in salt. And then... Sorry. Excuse me. They dye it red. That fucking shot is coming back up.

Wait, it's not fermented? I thought it was fermented. No, it's not. But it's boiled. It's just boiled egg. But now when I eat eggs, I would always have tomatoes. Like when I eat eggs with breakfast because it just reminds me of that. It just reminds me of home. Yeah, you love a good tomato. Yeah, always. I love a good tuyo. Tuyo would be like a really good tomato. And vinegar. No, I use patis. Patis.

Oh, it's already salty though. I know, but I like the saltiness. It's extra salty. Yeah. It's crazy. Because it balances with the tomato and the rice. Kiefer, do you remember any Pobresita food? Probably just that or like I would like to eat the, you know the...

When you cook rice from like a pot, not from the rice cooker, you know the ends of the rice? Oh, the utong. Yes. Utong. We call it kilabban. Utong? I don't know. Maybe I'm just... Okay. And I would just eat that by itself. Ah, I know what you're talking about. Or you can dip it in soy sauce. Like my mom would dip it in soy sauce. Wait, are we speaking Tagalog? Okay. Oh, we should do a five-minute Tagalog...

Okay period I'll set a timer We did it last time We did this last episode so Okay

Oh, perfect. And then we'll go into Product of the Week. Okay. Wow, love that. So for the next five minutes, we are strictly going to be speaking Tagalog. Maybe a little bit of Ilocano here and there because sometimes I get a little stumbled. Okay. I wouldn't understand it though. Bella, do you think in Ilocano? I mean, do you think in Tagalog or English? It used to be, I think, in Tagalog first, but now it's Taglish.

oh okay yeah i think in a lot of i mean same i used to think only in ilokano but now it's also ilokano english but i feel like english is starting to take over my brain a lot but like when when i'm mad it's only tagalog oh same if i'm talking shit about you it's ilokano yeah and so when i'm like yeah when i'm arguing with someone it's always like tagalog like yeah bad words exactly in my head i'm like tagalog

Like, oh my god. I'm not afraid. Okay. Next five minutes. Tagalog. We are in the Philippines now. I'll put the timer here. Who will start? You. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start. You start.

Um... Na wala na yung audience na. Na wala na yung audience. Hindi kasi alam mag-Tagalog eh. Yeah. Ano bang pinag-salitaan na Latin last time? Pilipinas. Yung topic ng Pilipinas. Okay. Anong tanong mo? I-compara mo yung ano. Oh, oh. Alam ko. Nung pumunta ka sa Amerika...

First, what's the biggest difference between the Philippines and America that you noticed? The first one. That was really deep of me. I love that. What's the biggest difference? The big buildings here in America. And it's clean. Yes, I was really culture shocked.

Wow.

Ang daming guwap. Mind you... Anong mind you? Mind you like 14... Anong mind you? Kasi hindi ako mag... Hindi ko alam mag-English. Kasi anong mind you? Baente... No, it...

I was only 14 then. So, I was like, wow, this place is so beautiful. It's so cold. You're like, I want to be here. Then, the first time I went to a buffet. Oh, buffet. Yes. Oh, there's money. There's money. No, buffet. No.

We went to the buffet and I was embarrassed because I only ate a little. Is the buffet all you can eat? Yes, all you can eat. And then the food you put on your plate, I didn't want to go for seconds. So I said, I'll just stay here. I'll just stay here. I was embarrassed because there were so many handsome people. Yeah.

Mia 14. Miski, what did you notice when you first came to Hawaii? The buildings. And the McDonald's. Yes. The drive-thru. The McDonald's doesn't have chicken. Yes. Why won't? Yes. There's no chicken. Spaghetti. There's no spaghetti at McDonald's. There's no rice. Ah.

I got culture shock because I was eating kichiria last time, Piatos. I just got out of the airport and our uncle picked up...

She picked us up at the airport. Okay. Then I was eating a Chichira piyato that I bought in the Philippines. That I put in the bag. Then I threw the piyato when the rain stopped. One, two, three. I don't know Tagalog. One, one.

But I was like, what is litter? And I was like, what is litter? And I was like, what is litter?

Basura. Basura. Like, I want to throw away your things outside. Tapos doon ako ng culture shock. Kasi malinis talaga dito sa Hawa. Kasi bawal mag-liter. Mag-liter. Mag-liter. Ano yung liter? Tapos dumarecho kami sa swap meet noon. Humunta ka ba sa swap meet dito sa Hawa? No swap meet. Oh.

Swap meet? Like flea market? Did you swap meet here? What swap meet? Flea market. But the ones that are not new. No, I didn't. Oh, wow. Let's go to Swap Meet next time. Yeah. It's fun. On Sunday. Before we... Go hiking. Before we go hiking. Yeah. Yeah. Perfect.

Are you working at Sunday Keeper? Yes. Can I request off? Request off so we can hike? I don't hike anymore. Who's truck did you drive earlier? My brother. Oh, Kevin? Yes. Are we going to go eat after this? You can. Yes, you can.

Oh, period. Wow. And that was... We ate that. We ate that. That was so much better than the first one. Yeah, that was... That was actually so much better. It was more fluent. It was more fluent. It was more flowy. Yeah. Her. Her.

Alright, you guys. We are now in the last part of the video. Oh my god, this is so sad. It went by so fast. Bella actually has a flight after this. It's in an hour. Yeah. I'm just kidding. She's not. I kicked me out. No. No, no, no. Is there anything else you want to talk about before we do product of the day? What did we talk about?

Girl, we don't talk about everything. Do you have any other shows coming up? Because I'm sure there's people… No, I have a single coming out. Tell me. It's January. It's called Will You Always Love Her? And I teased… The first video… Yes, with the chickens. I teased it with your chickens. And I was feeding them. Yeah. I'm very excited for that. Everyone was like…

The background is fake. And I'm like, girl, y'all know damn well. You see. I know. Yeah. Can we have a teaser now? Yeah. Can you sing live? Like, girl, you fucking swear. What do you mean? Like, tease live? Yeah. Give us a little, like, five second. Why do you still love her? Yeah. Or maybe, like...

Your favorite line or lyrics from the song that you were like, damn, my pen is really fucking heavy. Oh, yeah. I think it would be the first verse, honestly. Hit me. It was just very... Just give us five seconds because I don't want to get sued by Warner. Yeah, okay. Or L.U. Because it's already out, the full song, because I performed it. The Streamers Awards. But the first verse goes... Who produced that? My producer, Lucas Simp.

Period. He sounds familiar. He also like produced Sweet Delusion. Oh. Period. Yeah. You'll like that one. Sweet Delusion. Yeah. I love that. It's a little pitchy but. Bitch fuck you bitch. Okay let's hear it. Okay. Okay. Okay. Just listen to the words. Okay. Because it's very like angry. Hit me. Okay. Five seconds. Yeah. Five seconds. Don't sue me. Okay. Sleep in.

Oh!

Trying to cover up feelings. Okay. I was like, that's it? That's it. No, no. Give us more. Okay, okay. Let me be thin. Excuses. Do you think I'm clueless? When you make it obvious. How a name falls off your lips. That was 10 seconds already.

Okay. Yeah, so I wrote this song. Did you write this song by yourself? Yeah, with people. But I was definitely leading it that day because I was in my feels. I had this concept on my notes app. And it was literally like, it was just said, will you always love her? And I've always wanted to write a song about it because it's honestly about my exes who never got over their exes before getting married. I hope you're good. Yeah. And so this one's very personal to me. Why?

Yeah, honestly, I don't know why people do that. Like, you jump into a relationship when you're not over your ex is like kind of crazy. That is crazy. That is fucking crazy. So do you have any advice for those people who's not over their ex and going to another relationship? Or what did that experience teach you the most? Yeah. I think an advice if you're not over your ex and you're thinking about jumping into another relationship, I think... Yeah, you just don't. I feel like you should just take time for yourself and really think about...

I hate you, bitch. Stop.

I'm the silent joke they have. It's an odd date. Like if I was to give someone advice and they've been through that, I'd just be like, just don't date. Period. It ends there. Honestly, my advice, don't. Now we're going to do a product of the day. Do you have a product, Bijou? Yes. You did? I forgot to remind you. Yeah. Oh, but before we get into the product of the day, thank you so much for...

I know, thanks, Kat. Before we get into the product of the day, I just want to say thank you so much for all the love on the Baddest Radio merch. We still have a couple more and they're all ready to ship. Y'all don't gotta wait. So the links will be down below. We have hats and bumper stickers available as well as the shirt right here and this crew neck.

I swear you should sell those surfboards too. The surfboards? No, the surfboards are actually found on Facebook Marketplace. Oh, really? Yeah, it's this girl that just like paints surfboards and she was like, what colors do you want? And then what plants? I love that yellow one. Do you want it? Yeah. Can I take it?

Bitch, I'll ship it to you, but you're not going to take it. I'll ship it to you. Yeah. Because I feel like I want two blue ones instead of a yellow one. Yeah, I'll take the yellow one. You really can have it. You really can. I don't care. Can I take this couch? Bitch. No, I had to wait months for this. Bella, you're asking wait months. No, I already have one, but I have a white one. I know. I'm like surprised you don't have a yellow one. No. Or you should do like black, white, yellow.

Like your outfit today. Like a bumblebee. Oh my gosh, yes. My mind. I know. Can you insert your design in my face? I know. Girl. Okay, let's do product of the day. I'll go first. Okay. Miss Kaylee. So my product of the day is nothing really unusual. It's just a safety pin. You might be asking, where am I wearing a safety pin? You're right.

I'm wearing one right now, actually. Oh, I love a safety pin. Oh, is it a necklace? Oh, you made it your necklace thing? Yeah. So it's this pin right here. And I like to put it on my clothes, especially if I like, what is this top called? What is that top called? What? Halter tops. Oh, halter. When you like good halter tops and you don't have any, just get a safety pin and just pin the back. And you have a cute halter top.

A little hat for you guys. I love that. Period. I love that also Miss K thinks about her product of the week when she gets to my house. Yeah. It's literally half of my product of the week. I'd be like, Miss K, what is your product of the week? I panicked. Okay. Bella, do you have a product of the week? Yes. What is it? I use it every day. And it's this. You hear that? Your little suction cup. Honestly, I use it as a fidget sometimes. But also like it's...

Sticks to everything that's like on that wall. I don't think it's gonna stick in that wall because it's so it doesn't stick to everything Well, it's textured and not textured. Okay, so like that moment No, try on the wall. Wait, not really trust trust just do it just do it hard Maybe that's your product of next week

But it does work. It does. It does work. It's there somewhere. I'm not going to grab it. Y'all have seen Octobody. Yeah, no. It's... My product of the week is the same product that I showed last week with the deleted footage of Bella. And it's this...

I love it so much. It's from the brand Merit. And I only really got it because the shade is called Leo. And I was like, oh, girl, that's going to match me. But I love it so much. It's like the perfect bronzer for my skin tone. It's not too pigmented. And it just blends into my skin. I love. Period. That was the episode.

Oh my god Bella I feel like you're gonna be The baddest radio resident Like I feel like We're just gonna have you in Every time you're over Yeah no I come here all the time Yeah so the next time we'll see you Will probably be the next holiday Or summer Next time she will have A full on performance behind us While we're talking While we're talking Miss Kaylee Where can they find you girl? You can find me at M-I-S-K-A-A-A-Y Anywhere And obviously you guys already know About Bish's

It's at BretmanRockEverywhere. And make sure you guys follow and subscribe to The Baddest Radio here on YouTube, Instagram, and TikTok. Bella, where can they find you? It's Bella Porch everywhere on socials. You can also find me on like any streaming apps. Period. All right, Bella. Sing us out, girl. Wait, wait, what? Three, two, one, go. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Bye, Beach. I'll see you next Thursday. Yeah. Don't forget to follow, rate, and like. You can follow me at BretmanRock on everything and follow the podcast at The Baddest Radio on all social media. Bye, Beach. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.