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Valid for 20% off site-wide. Standard exclusions apply. Valid March 5th, 2025 through May 30th, 2025. Thanks for listening to my Call of the Day podcast. You can hear my live radio program Monday through Friday from 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Liz, welcome to the program. Hey, Dr. Laura. Hi. Can you hear me? Yes. How can I help? Okay.
I think I am 35. I've been married for five years to my husband. We have a four and a five-year-old. I have a 15-year-old that he has been a big part of her life, my husband, that I had her young. I never married her father. But I think that
I feel like I'm in a marriage that's full of hate. And I don't know if I can continue. Can I tell you? Explain to me when the hate started. What are we talking about here? Well, he never really, we've never really had a lot of sex. And that was, I kind of settled for that because he wasn't,
He was a nice guy. He's a nice guy. He was never mean to me, you know, and I've experienced that before. And so for years I've been, I've asked him and I've asked him, you know, why won't you have sex with me? You know, it's amazing that we even have two children together. And
he never really answered me like ever i don't know what he would say he would just be like you know liz you know i'm just tired or i've never been that way so finally like a few months ago he got a little liquid courage he had a few drinks and i got it out of him and she likes fat girls he likes big women
The opposite of me, I've been mainly 120 pounds my whole adult life. So I feel just like now I feel just like severely neglected. When we do have sex now, I've tried to like embrace it. I've even drank some boost to try to get weight on me. And it's just not, I can't do it.
And I feel like he sits on a gross toilet inside of his workplace, scrolls his phone, and gets his pleasure off of girls on the internet that are his fetish. And I'm so angry about it. So disgusted by it. I'm so confused. I thought he was gay, maybe. Like, maybe that's why he didn't like me. But this is like a whole different thing.
Well, take me back. How did you meet? How did you meet? We met when we were 13 years old. He was my first boyfriend. We dated for two years, like very young. Then a couple of years later, like when I was like a senior in high school, we dated again until I met my 15-year-old daughter's father and I left him. And then...
I went through just years of just, you know, bad men, mean men, stupid choices. And then, you know, we just messaged each other one day on Facebook and he was easy. He was nice. He was consistent and always there. So we got married. I had to, I got pregnant. I was like, I'm not going to get pregnant.
Okay. How long when you reestablished to marriage, how long was that?
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The Hulu Original Series. Good American Family. New episodes Wednesdays. Streaming on Hulu. How long in between or how long before we got married? Yes. Well, I think that's the same thing. I may have lost my marble for a moment. I just want to know when you went back and saw that he was on Facebook, between that moment and your wedding, how long did that take? Well, maybe two and a half years. Okay. And in that two and a half years, how was the sex?
It was not a lot. Very, like, mediocre. Not very often. But I felt safe with that. And a little confused, you know. But you married it anyway. You married it anyway. So the reason I was asking that is I wanted to know if you had forewarning. And you did. And now you have two kids with him.
And one of the things that I would recommend is that you go to, you two go to a sex therapist and deal with each other's fantasies, desires, and all of that. A sex therapist helps you two to talk about it, to understand better how everybody's thinking and feeling and what they would like and not like in spite of the fact that people do have fetishes. That doesn't mean you two can't have
a reasonable sex life with each other. And I certainly would not recommend you walk out of this marriage. There's nothing evil here. He's got some, as people like to say to me, issues, issues. And so do you. However, we have three kids who don't need more turmoil. So if it means very little sex with him for the rest of their growing up,
I think you need to have enough honor to do that in a happy way so that the kids are not affected. They don't know whether you're having sex or not. There's no hate going on. Don't use that word for a situation like this. You knew you weren't going to have a lot of sex, but he had so many qualities that made you feel safe that you went ahead anyway. Well, those qualities are still there. So I urge you to go not to a regular psychotherapist, but a sex therapist. Okay?
I think that will help the two of you find some common ground. And I mean, every relationship is going to be different in the world. My number 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars.
And be sure to share this podcast with a friend on Facebook or your preferred social media platform. Spring starts with savings at the Home Depot. So if you're working on getting your yard spring ready, you'll need the right tools to get it done. Like the RYOBI 1 Plus 18-volt cordless string trimmer, now only $129. Or the RYOBI 1 Plus 18-volt cordless blower, also for only $129.
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