Refresher: My Daughter Is Too Dependent on Me
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Time now for a refresher from my Dr. Laura Call of the Day archives. And remember, you too can participate on my live radio program heard weekdays from 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Michael, welcome to the program. Hi. Hi. I was calling, yes, I was calling because I had a question about my...

the right balance of time with my daughter she's 26 and married and i i get a lot of text messages daily from her and phone calls and usually what's wrong what's wrong with your daughter

I think she's kind of needy right now. Stuff going on with her husband and family stuff there. How does she resolve the stuff with her husband by texting and calling you frequently during the day? She doesn't resolve anything. Well, then maybe responding to all of that is not the best thing for her.

If you're not helping her, then you're hurting her. Because instead of venting and having you poor baby her, she could go to a counselor or minister and deal with whatever the problems are. I was trying to figure out if I had any obligation to help her at all.

Yes, you help her by telling her, I can't help you by talking to you so many times in a day. You've got to get help. You've got to get professional help. If she broke her leg, would you try to splint it? No. Yes or no. Why? Because you don't know what you're doing. Right. Well, right now, you don't know what you're doing. So it's no different if her leg is fractured or her psyche is fractured. Her marriage is fractured.

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That's how you help her, by pointing her in that direction, not by pretending you know how to set the leg. Okay. Okay, what? I'm going to do that. Well, you have to. I'm going to point her towards a professional. Right, because you're not helping her. Your heart wants to, but you can't. And you have to stop responding to the texts and calls. You have to stop that. You have to put pressure on her to get help, not just to get sympathy.

and attention. Is there like a balance of how often or I don't want to... Right now, she doesn't need to vent to you. She needs professional help. Has nothing to do with a balance. But if you're intent on having a number, either one call or one text per day. Okay. Can't be one of each. Tell her the truth. Call her up and say, I'm not really helping you.

By talking to you a million times, if you have problems, you've got to go to a therapist and take him with you or go alone. Do something. I'm not helping you by you just calling and crying or complaining. You've got to get professional help or nothing will change. And I'm not going to talk to you more than once a day because I'm not helping. She'll get angry because you see, to see a therapist means she has to face herself. To call you, she just has to bitch. Do you understand that?

Yeah. Good. Excellent. That's great. I'm going to do it. Okay. Thank you, sir. All right. Thank you. Bye. My number 1-800-375-2872. If you like this podcast, be sure to rate it on Apple Podcasts or your favorite place to listen to my podcast. Of course, I'd love if you gave me five stars.

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