Ask, Tell, Confess: We All Fake Orgasms
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B-U-N-N-I-E. Hey guys, I need to ask you a question. I want to know why in the hell are you not on Patreon? I don't think you guys even realize how much content we have on Patreon. Let me break it down for you. We have the Bunny XO show. We have Meet the D-Fords. We have propaganda. We have more shows that we're adding and more.

And not to mention, we have the visuals of the podcast. Head over to www.patreon.com backslash dumb blonde podcast and sign up. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Ask, tell, confess. Hello, friends. Hello, friends.

- Welcome back to Ask, Tell, Convince. - I feel like you just whispered sweet nothings to me. Oh, there she goes. - Why are you talking during my intro? - I thought you were done. I couldn't hear it. - It's so quiet, we didn't know. - I thought she was done and then all of a sudden I see- - It just keeps going.

Have you ever seen those singers when they're like... Yeah, that's exactly what that was. Imagine if you did that the whole podcast. Oh, I do. She does. I'm always fucking with my microphone. I'm in the background going, lower your mic because she's like this. She's like, okay, so how would you...

And then she'll text us later, why is the mic in front of my face? I'm like, because you put it there. It's just because it's like a habit. You just like, you know, I need something to touch. Sometimes I get, I don't know. What do I do? She's like Ricky Bobby. Yeah. You need to get her like a tit to hold on to, like those squishy ball tits. Have you seen like the little rings? I usually hold on to tatch. If I'm holding on to tatch, I'm good.

but it's not a fluff because he looks mad at you. Well, he farted and it smells like beef stew over here right now. So she goes, I'm going to the park. He left you with it. That's crazy. All right. Who's ready to kick it off? Cause I'm ready to go home. I got it. I got a couple. I got a question. I got hiccups. Okay. Um, Nikki wants to know if you guys assigned one another theme songs, what would they be? It was one of my questions. You bitch.

If we assigned each other ourselves. Each other theme songs. Oh, God, this is hard. I'm so bad with shit like that. I don't know. I feel like bunnies would be the bare necessities. Look for the bare necessities. The simple bare necessities. Don't forget about your worries and your strife. I mean the bare necessities.

I wasn't done. Why were you talking during that? Didn't know where you kept going. I was going to say the lion. I feel like, okay, if it was Disney themed, then you would be, who's the lady on the tea kettle on the fucking Beauty and the Beast? What? Mrs. Potts. You're Mrs. Potts. Shaming me right now. I'm going to eat that shit in my dog last episode. And no, I'm not. And.

And no, I'm not. Chip is cash. Literally, Chip is totally cash, dude. But you have her presence. Oh, that was so great. It's like very motherly. I'm very motherly. And loving. Not the size of a fucking tea kettle. I didn't shave like one. And let's see, Hayley, if it's Disney themed. I like the Disney theme. Oh, the Disney theme. You're fucking Ursula from, what is it? Fuck, I'm leaving. What is the song? No, I'd rather be on.

What is the song that she sings? What is the song that she sings? Poor unfortunate souls. I feel like that's more me. No. Oh my gosh. I was thinking something ditzy for her and you went straight Ursula. What would you say for her? That's crazy. For her, gosh.

If we're going Disney themed, I don't know how we got on Disney theme, but here we are. Yeah. No, I just went straight bare necessities. I was going like the lion from Wizard of Oz for you. Yeah. I was going to go like life is a highway.

I feel like she's so life is a highway because it's just like nothing matters. Rascal Flatts life is a highway or the rock version? Rascal Flatts all day. We were in Vegas and we were like driving towards the mountain. She's like someone turn on the entire album Cars right now. Oh my God. That's Jay's favorite. He loves that. It's not what I would have expected. Yeah. We bring on Daddy Gary next season guys. We love Daddy Gary. Let's get fucking Daddy chatty.

I want daddy chatty. Bro, the other day... I'll be sobbing the entire podcast. I feel like the whole podcast is just going to be that. Yeah. We're all just going to be like...

He gets hotter. Listen, he gets hotter the older he gets, man. Because he was not hot back in the day and now he's like so hot. Maybe we've just matured because he looks the exact same. I don't know. I feel like he got a little bit more swag. I don't know. I feel like I failed as a mother, guys. You look like a fucking hobo hippie back in the day. I like that. I feel like I failed as a mother because the other day...

Olivia was sitting right next to Chad Kroger and did not care at all. He was sitting next to Chad? Yes, at the Post Malone concert. It's literally daddy chatty Olivia. And I was like, Olivia, do you know who that is? And she was like, nope. I said, that's Chad Kroger. She's got her iPad. She goes, okay. That's literally me.

That's me when I don't know somebody you guys know. I failed as a parent. Got it. You gotta do better. I will say guys, Olivia is obsessed and when I say knows the entire album right now, I write Sins Not Tragedies. Oh, Panic at the Disco, baby. She's starting. Panic at the Disco and Get Her It's Nine in the Afternoon. That one?

Yes. Yeah. And then fallout boy obsessed. Oh, I love them. You should hear a cash thing. Fallout boy is the cutest thing. Cause he doesn't know any of the words. He just gets like little moments of words and he's like, they're the nicest guys too. I've partied with them. Oh really? Yeah. I have partied with them. There was a baby oil slip and slide and their hotel room. It was fun.

It was the night I actually met Holly Madison and she was there with Criss Angel and we were all there partying in their hotel room. They were on stage. Wait, I feel like I've heard this story. Was there a big shower involved? Yes. They were on stage and I was there with, I think my boyfriend at the time and a couple other girlfriends and they pointed to me on stage and were like, we want them to come in the back. And as we were leaving, somebody ran up and was like, Hey, fall out boy, I want you to come up to their suite. And I was like, okay, cool. So we went up there and it was great.

She's what everyone assumes is going to happen to them at a concert. Every concert I go to. Yeah, all the little girls in the like are all ready and in the crowd. Yeah, when I went to see Jonas Brothers. He's staring at me. Yeah, that's what actually happens. Pete Wentz was for real making eye contact with me the entire fucking concert. It was living people's dreams. It's cool. I get it. Yeah. I mean, this was fucking back in the fucking day. Then she's like, then we went and had naked slippers.

I actually have a newspaper clipping from not newspaper, a magazine like us weekly or some, some magazine. There's me and Pete Wentz on top of a pool table, like dancing. You want, I need to see this. I will. I'll show it to you guys. I'll send you guys a picture of it. That's crazy. It was a huge thing because this is when my space was big.

They thought that he was cheating on Ashley Simpson with me. And I felt so bad that I like DM to Ashley Simpson. And I was like, he was a complete gentleman. Like there was nothing going on. You were like, I was just on a pool table. Yeah. We were literally, it just happened to take that fucking picture. Cause I said like Pete Wentz, fallout boy parties with blonde or something like that. Like, yeah.

And I was like, and I wrote her, I was like, I promise you it was nothing like that. Cause I felt so bad. She never responded, but yeah, that was, I felt really bad. I have some lore. You guys got a little bit of lore. I love it. All right. All right. Who's kicking this off? Okay. Uncle daddy and other family plot twists. Uncle daddy, uncle daddy. Have we called anybody? Uncle daddy, uncle daddy.

So when I was 18, my dad decided to come out to me. So dad's gay, right? A few years after my dad came out to me, I find out that my mom had been sleeping with my uncle, not blood uncle, no relation. It was so let me best friend, dad's best friend, dad's brother-in-law. So her dad's brother-in-law.

The mom was sleeping with. I don't understand that. Her dad's brother-in-law. So he has her. Her ex's brother-in-law, basically. No, there's no ex. She was cheating. Oh, she's still. Okay. So. Her husband's brother-in-law. This is intertwined. It's a little bit. It's like the second cousin removed. It would be you and Scott.

Your brother. Your brother-in-law. Okay, so he had a sister. Dad had a sister. Yes. Okay, that's what I said. So brother-in-law. Mom is having an affair with brother-in-law. So uncle. Her uncle. Long story short, my mom ended up marrying him. So now mom is married to the...

Because they had kids. I hate it here. Long story short, we jokingly now call him uncle daddy. My cousins are basically my step siblings. 10 out of 10 family drama. Okay. Yeah. That was the most confusing fucking story I've ever heard. So yeah, now she has cousin siblings. I'm still perplexed. This is

I love that. She told us this story the other night at the house. And she goes, can I submit that? I said, fucking please do. What the fuck? She goes, I don't think I have childhood trauma. I said, yeah, you do. We just read it. Yeah, you do. I said, you don't have childhood trauma? Yeah, you do, sister. I said, you have sibling cousins and an uncle daddy. Yeah. What are you fucking talking about while your dad came out as gay? Yeah, uncle daddy is crazy. I love that dad came out and was like, hey, this is what it is. Yeah, I kind of wanted to lean into more of that.

that how did that happen well she also did mention that like dad would be gone every weekend for work

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8 24 25 at 11 59 PM Eastern time. Number one, based on Ehlers and Krayjic 2H2O4 product analysis. All right. So Shannon has an ask. Why is it so hard for me to orgasm? The man is not the problem. He does everything right. And I have gotten so close than nothing.

I feel like she hasn't learned her body. Well, a lot of women. I'm going to just put it out there. Not a lot of women orgasm with men. It's very hard. You have to have clitoral stimulation. A lot of the time you have to be on top and like rubbing your clit at the same time as you're getting penetration.

or else you're not going to orgasm. You can use a toy while he's banging you. Like if you're a doggy style, use a toy that'll make you orgasm. But sometimes when it gets up to that point of orgasm, you feel a little bit

Like it almost feels like you might pee sometimes. You have to be able to get past that point to get to the whole full like pleasure zone. Yeah. So don't feel bad because your husband's not making you orgasm. There's a lot of women who do not orgasm with men. And the first orgasm I ever had was with a vibrator. Mm hmm.

Wasn't with a man. Yeah. I feel like she needs to learn her body though, because like something, there's something more there. And if she said she's close, she's not passing over the rainbow. Like you gotta keep going. Yeah. And I don't think it's about learning our body. I think it's just learning different positions to where you can stimulate that because we can also orgasm from the inside, but that's even harder. And like guys have to do that with a finger unless they do have like a captain hook and can reach that spot. Yeah.

But yeah, it's pretty normal. We get a sex expert on here and we have them teach us all the tricks. Totally down. Yeah. Let's do it. I know. Yeah. But don't feel bad, girl. You're not the only one. Everybody's like that. Yeah. Haley, have you ever, ever orgasmed with a man?

Have you told a man that you did? Oh, I've told plenty. All of them. So they, I've told plenty. I am the best. So they leave. I'm over it. I am the best at faking orgasms. I will make a man feel 10 feet tall. Yeah. Yeah. How do you feel about that?

I'm rethinking some experiences now. I would be willing to say 90% of women orgasming with their, their significant other are fake. Oh yes. I can probably count on one hand with a guy. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. My husband has made an orgasm, but there's other men that I've been with that I've never had an orgasm with. I've had to use like,

To make it happen. So once they leave, no, well, or while you're with them, she's like, all right, let me call you. Maybe you don't want to feel that vulnerable with them because the orgasming, listen, you get to know somebody when you see their old face.

Have you ever, like, you could fucking think a dude is so fine and you fucking see their orgasm face and they're like, eh. Yeah, like one of those goats, you know? Stop. I get inked out so fast, I can't. I know, but imagine what some of our orgasm faces look like. Yeah, I couldn't imagine what my face looks like. What does yours look like? It's called the vinegar stroke. Have you heard of it? What? So it's, pretend you have a spoon of vinegar and then hold it up under your nose. That's what you're...

Your faces. No, no, my, my orgasm face is way hotter. I've practiced it. I don't think I look. I've practiced it. Yeah. I've been film. I've been on film many a times. I know what my orgasm face looks like. That's so funny. I, we need to test this theory. I wonder, have you ever had like a girl who had like a crazy orgasm face? Um,

Hmm. No. Have you guys ever been with a dude? Have you been with a lot of girls? I mean, I've been a few. Yeah. I'm not lying. Did they fake it? I had a dude that when he would orgasm, he would flex. Oh my God. That was for him. That's so cringy. He would flex. It was just like, oh God. Like deering? Yeah, like while he was pumping away. What did you do?

I took it like a champ. That's what I did. I can't. I know. I just don't like men. Haley said, I don't like men. One day you're going to find someone one day and it's going to be happily ever after. I love being like living alone. God, if I had someone else there all the time.

I know, but in my space, here's the thing. My husband drives me up a wall. I love him to death. He's my best friend. I couldn't imagine not living with him. You know, like, I don't know when you find somebody that you're just comfortable with, you want them. It's such a, I've never been like that though. Even when I was younger, I've never like,

I don't like being touched. I don't like any of that. I mean, I don't like being touched either. And then I have someone who literally learned everything about me and knows when to touch me and when not to touch me. Literally, Jason will know. He'll be like, I love my husband because he will like approach me evaluating how I am. And then it'll just either be a kiss on the forehead or a hug. Because it's like, I can clearly tell you don't want me to come near you. And I'm like,

Or if I'm like, I need it. Then he knows, you know, people will literally learn you better than you know yourself. And you deserve that. You deserve to have like a yin to your yang. You want it.

I don't know. I know how clingy you can be. I can't wait till this happens. I know. It's going to happen. Literally, I know. It's just like me. I used to be like, kids, ew. And now I hear a fucking baby crying in fucking a store that I'm shopping in. And I'm like, oh. And I've never thought I would be like that. Ever. You change. I promise you change. You were not the same person you were when we met you. So I know for a fact that your just time isn't here yet. Yeah.

I still have been the same not wanting relationship. You are a stage 10 clinger with me when we are anywhere. That's you. I know, but like imagine feeling that with someone else. No, you were a little bit of a lover when we first got together. I was a hoe. Right. Well, not a lover. Yeah. Well, I didn't want to say that. You can say it. You already called me Ursula. But no, shut up. I was thinking about it.

I was thinking like how she wears the makeup and just like big and fancy. But anyways, shut up. You big personality, big personality. Okay. Um, I don't know. Your time will come. It's coming.

I'm going to be like 80 calling you guys like, hey, gosh, I found a man. Well, when you're 80, I'll be dead. So hurry it up. I need to fuck it. I think you'll be. Yeah. Are you kidding me? She's barely going to start showing like she's like 50 or something at 100. I'm going to be tacked up like Dolly, baby. Don't even play. She's going to give me a hot lady. Hot.

Can't wait. Yeah. You pull off in like you right now. Deadass could pull off like our age. Oh, for sure. Yes. Not when I don't have makeup on. Maybe when I have makeup on. I feel like you're youthful without makeup. Yeah. So, so youthful without makeup.

I can see the reflection of my face in your forehead. Yeah. You come out and I'm like, it's literally shining. It hurts my eyes sometimes. Are you kidding? All right, guys, we'll see you next week. Bye.