Ellen Cleghorne
01:05:09 Share

Yes, I have actually stayed at Airbnbs from time to time. And truth be told, I do really like them. I'm being totally honest right now that I've had great experiences with them. Yeah. I mean, you can have your look at you go get your own place, get your own pool, your own living room. You're not going to walk in an elevator. You're not going to see people when you're walking around in your undergarments. Yeah.

Yes. And if you don't understand what we're talking about, you should go online. What we're saying is you have a house with a kitchen and a bathroom and it's just for you, tailored for you. You liked your Airbnb over a hotel. Yes. And I do think I've had relatives stay nearby and sometimes it's very nice for them to do an Airbnb and have a little house and they're not underfoot. The last thing you want is your house guest to say, excuse me, um,

Where would I find a towel? That's a toughie when it's because they're naked. Well, it's like the 1800 time you say on the towel rack. Yeah. Thank you. I was going to look there. People don't even think hotels sometimes just go, hey, I'll go there. I'll get an Airbnb. So you won't regret it.

So, David, I hosted Jimmy Kimmel. James Kimmel. James Edward Kimmel, who was also a state senator from Louisiana. You did two nights. Two nights. Great stuff. Thank you. You had Quentin Tarantino among others. That was a thrill. I so loved being able to...

I specifically compliment someone who I really admire his work tremendously. And to see him laugh when I was quoting lines from Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, which I've seen 11 times over a period of time. Don't think I'm weird. He just laughed so hard. He's great. You know, he did. We should have him on because he did. Wait, we should have him on. Say again. We should have him on. That's a good plan. Oh, yeah. Brad Pitt. We should have him on, Quentin, because he did. Oh, he wasn't there, but we did John Travolta and we did.

Quentin Tarantino's Welcome Back, Cotter. That was a great sketch. I would love to have been there when he was there, but he was such a kick and so much fun. And I love making him laugh. And the next night you had Spade and we had a blast. You came out dismantled with your-

What was the driver was eating, the limo driver? Cheetos. Cheetos chunk was hysterical. And then something about mosquitoes. I'll try to find that chunk and I'll put it up on Instagram or something. Mosquitoes. We did talk about the Burger King guy getting gifts at his 27 years of Burger King. Yeah. And then I was going to tell you that when I left SNL after six years-

Lauren gave me a gift bag. He gave me- Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, I didn't get one. Yeah, he gave me- David, please. Peanut M&Ms. Okay. A ticket to Cats. Actually, it was just a cat. It was just Cat. It was one ticket and it was a different play. It was not great. It wasn't even Cats? No, it was Cat. That was like a little practical. Oh, okay. It was one ticket because they gave the Burger King guy one ticket to a movie.

He's got one ticket to ride. So yeah, Lauren gave me that and a slinky. Anyway, it was great. I was appreciative. I did Trump and Biden, which was maybe brave, stupid, or fun, whatever you want to think in our current cultural climate. But my aim was to entertain. And inside baseball, I didn't have my glasses and I squint as Biden and the prompter was way back. And I'm like, man, I'm fucked, right?

I could barely see it. It was live. Yeah, then it opened my eyes and like that. But you know what? I did a goofy wig. I did the best I could. I want to tell you the Cheeto bit was so wonderful. Fantastic. It was fantastic. You're fantastic. And Biden, you know, the thing is, I did the whisper. We're going to do fly on the wall. Because we know how to do fly on the wall. So that was fun. And.

And the staff was incredible and the writers and producers. Great people there at Mr. Kimmel's show. And now here's our regular intro to Ellen that's still not Ellen yet. Ellen Cleghorn, Dana. Ellen Cleghorn was on with me and with you. Yes. And she was a powerhouse from the beginning. She had just a great presence. She had her bandmates at the time, Melanie Hutzel and –

Beth Cahill and others. Oh, they all sort of came in together. Siobhan. Siobhan Fallon. Yes. Great. And Ellen was part of that team. And she has a lot of firsts in her career. As a person, she's charming, funny. She is smart. She's a teacher right now. Ellen Claighorn has a PhD in theater arts from Tisch University. So I don't think- My friend has a PhD, pussyhound disease.

Hey, we can pair that with Jack off in the box. We got to keep the younger viewers here. They're starting to snooze. Welcome to flies after dark. Yeah. Glowing. No, Ellen is smart and good in sketches. She's Zoraida. She had a daughter on the show who was five and now she's a, we can't say, it'll be on. So we'll find out soon. Her daughter would come around, super cute. We put her in a lot of sketches and-

Ellen is just a powerhouse. Just a big, big, big personality. Here she is, guys. Here she is, the adorable Ellen Claycorn. Oh my gosh. Dana, look who forgot. Look at that mask. I'm naked. I'm not a super spreader. Ellen is, where are you? She's at Costco. I know those eyes. That's Ellen. She's stomping. She goes, do I need a volume or audio on this podcast?

As long as we can see you. We can see you, Alan. We can't hear you. I'm doing sign language. Let's just air this. It's too funny. The video, too. We can't hear you, Alan. Alan, you're frozen and we can't hear you. It's funny. We hear choppy stuff like albums. My two sons are into hip-hop and rap heavily compared to me being from the 60s. So, they've introduced me to it. And we play around with beats and do rhymes and, you know...

Dana, do you want to hear? I'm going to sing a rap song. Ready? Okay.

My name's Lamont and I was born in January. I'm a Capricorn. God, Ellen will know this one if she unfreezes. I got one. I wore one called, you got a problem with this? And it's just a big beat. You got a problem with this? And it just repeats. You got a problem with this? That would work in a dance club if I'm on Molly. Because really when I hear it in the gym and it's big beats and repetitive phrasing, it feels like comedy in a way, you know? That might be from Rapper's Delight.

I've talked about that before. Snoop Dogg was the first one that got me hooked on it. Ow. My name's Vermont, and I was born on a jam farm in Vermont. Snoop. Yeah, give me a word, I'll rhyme it. Dude, I saw Snoop on the dumbest ad, schnizzle. It's just like some corny, dopey ad on the side of a bus. I'm like, Snoop, please turn something down. Alan, that was the funnest beginning we've had, actually. Yeah, we're not a professional outfit, so...

don't worry well when you guys get really high tech and stuff then you have to have me back yeah we are hey yes well it was 13.95 to get the good setup and uh cadence decided to spend 9.95 you get you know so do you have any questions or should we start okay ellen

We have time for one final question for Ellen. This has been Ellen. Now, Ellen, let's start by saying I was an angel at the beginning when you were there, and then we'll go from there. You were an angel. You know, that's nice to hear.

Because that place is so tough. It's hard to not be nice to everyone, but you're usually just walking down the hallway thinking. You're like thinking of a sketch, thinking of why I'm not on, thinking of why my sketch bombed, thinking of if Farley's going to eat my lunch. You know, there's a million things going through your head. The answer to that is yes. The answer is always yes. And it's just hard to...

you know, when you tell your side of it, I mean, you're there and you're, you're there on one of the times we had a lot of cast members and a lot of people on a mouse to feed. You were very savvy anyway.

So I don't think you would have ever done anything out on towards or whatever. You're always such a forward thinking man. When I look back and you know, you always, you introduced me to the phrase, a friend of the show. We still say that Lauren would go. And then the terrorizing for the cast member still with the show.

Still with the show I had never heard that before You never got Still with the show Yeah Lauren That was one of Lauren's favorites I found it funny But he's a friend of the show You know Alan One time when I think I don't know what years You were there I was there 90 to 94 Something like that Okay so Overlapped a lot But In the summers We would call to see If we're getting picked up

And he go, I just, I don't know if Dave was ever around. And I'm like, this is just, this is the one thing my manager hears once a year review. And that's the one thing. And it's like, you got to go, Lauren, you got to be careful what you say, because that's it for a year. He's like, are you ever going to be there? I go, that's all I am is here all the time. What is it? It's just, it's just like a thing to get me off my ass. I don't know. But it

it really like would stress me out to hear that. You had so much more contact with him than, than I did. As everybody makes it, I said, I never even, I didn't know what his voice sounded like. Do you know this is a good impression or not? I couldn't tell you. I don't know who he's doing. I guess it's Lauren. Right. How did you, what happened with Lauren? When you got, when you got hired, that's when you talked to Lauren and then that was kind of it for the run. I didn't speak to him when I got hired. Oh, you didn't speak to him. I, I,

The only person I spoke to was Al Franken. Oh, really? Al Franken. Yeah, I would go to Al Franken's office. And then I went in the Turner's office. Oh, Bonnie and Terry Turner. Bonnie and Terry Turner. That was it. Were they the head writers by any chance, Dana? No, they were just really pivotal. They were in a lot of quadrants. They do all kinds of styles and they helped me a lot. Church chat and other things. Yeah, they were great.

So Ellen, they kind of like gave you the ropes or whatever? No, they gave me no ropes. They just looked at me. So I saw your tape and then they just stare at you and I'm like, okay. I guess they were sizing me up to see what could I do.

And Al Franken, all he did was ask me one time, he asked me if I could belch. And I was like, no. And he was through with me. And I was like, wait, what? He was through with me, literally? Hey, can you belch? That was it? And then he scratched out nine sketches. Oh.

As I didn't, because, you know, I grew up in the time when you ladies don't belch. Well, I hope there's still a time like that. She said, don't you dare. Don't you dare belch. So I always was afraid. I admired people who could actually belch and cue. Oh, I can. I had such a low, I really admire people like that. I can. Maybe that's why I got the show. I couldn't do it.

Could you guys do a spit take? I mean, a spit take was kind of like with a belch. It's like an easy laugh. There's an art to the spit take, but I don't think I ever did one on this show. You know? I like a spit take when I see people do that. If it takes you by surprise, you know? You know, a good spit take, you don't see a lot anymore because I think they ran through them. But if you see them now, it's kind of funny because, and it can't be a planned one.

I mean, it can't be look plan. That's the worst. So Ellen, you got, you did, you were doing standup right at the beginning, Ellen?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got it from doing stand-up because I used to be in the clubs all the time. And I think a lot of people that I used to do stand-up with got hired. Which ones? Can you remember their names? Maybe we ran into them. Well, maybe you know him. He's named Chris Rock. Wait a minute. Chris, let me write that down. What is up? Chris, where has he been? I mean, what happened to Chris Rock? Barack Obama. Wow.

Our president, Barack Obama. I go, Rock, you say everything twice in your act. I told him when I was teaching my kids how to do stand-up for the clarity of the setup. I said, let's look at Chris Rock because he was really good at- Very articulate. He nails the subject. Hits a premise, does comedy, hits it again, and it's just like really easy on your brain so you can enjoy it. He obviously became a master of the craft.

Masterful. So, Ellen, doing clubs back then, were you doing like Catch Rising Star or those kind of, those are the ones I kind of knew, but I didn't know like the underground ones. I just knew like a few. I never, I never really went on when I was there.

But I saw you actually at Catch a Rising Star. Oh, good. So you did go on there, David. Well, that's the only one I knew. And I think that's when I auditioned at. And then, so that's the only one I could call and say, can I come down if it was now and then to do a set? Because I didn't really know the drill. I saw you there and you used to do this bit about...

Scoliosis. I think I like girls, a little arch back, a little scoliosis. Yeah. That's a funny word. It is. That was the first time I had ever even heard of scoliosis. I was like, this is great. This, this, this comedy is educational. Oh my God.

It's more shocking that I still do the joke. No. But I, you know, Ellen is funny. I was just telling Dana, I taped a special and I don't do that many specials. No one's asking and beating down my door, but I did one and I was telling Dana that I did a joke that was offensive. You know, I sort of did it on purpose. The second show, cause I felt like, okay, I sort of got all my jokes. And before I got off stage, I did one. I was telling Dana, it was kind of funny. Cause then I,

sort of yelled at the audience for not liking it just to be stupid but here's a joke ellen you tell me if it's if it's you see why they didn't like it so i say i went to las vegas for a show or whatever and then look at blurry setup unlike chris rock i went to las vegas for whatever and um and the newspaper it said that day it was the anniversary of the las vegas shootings which we all had heard about and it said today is the anniversary of the october 1st shootings and

And I asked the guy there, I go, isn't this the Las Vegas shootings? And he goes, yeah, they changed it. They got a brand expert because the Las Vegas shooting sounded too much like everyone was getting shot in Las Vegas. And I go, well, yeah, that's what happened. And he goes, yeah, but October 1st hits the ear better. And I go, oh, they hired the same people that did the Oklahoma City situation and the kerfuffle at Columbine. I didn't even get to...

I didn't even get to the Sandy Hook snafu and they had already given up on me. Oh my gosh. They got it. They give up during the premise. Columbine is called schools out. Yeah, go ahead. Columbine was where this woman was just staring me in the front row and I go, too much? And she goes, yeah. And I go, yeah. I go, you know what Netflix likes is when you try stuff on your special.

You don't tell them and it could be some legal problems and you do it anyway. And so they like that. They like undercooked half-ass shit that can't offend the crowd. Anyway, I'm going to wrap things up. And then I did like... David's nickname is showstopper. So what we're going to go... It was such a showstopper. Go ahead. No, no, I was just saying... No, no, no. I think that it could... I really think that it could work because everybody's so...

sensitive right now. So they have to, you can't say what it was. You have to make it sound palatable. And that's what they're doing. They're making these horrible things sound like they're not fun, but they're just like, okay, you know,

It's softening it. It wasn't that bad. Yeah. They're showing an old Dana Carvey commercial on the, on the gram or Twitter or wherever. Oh. You did a commercial with, I think it was Pepsi Cola or something. Oh. Oh. You're shuffling cards or is it Lay's Potato Chips or something? Yeah. You're shuffling cards. Yeah. At a casino. Guys,

I can't believe that's around still. I think that was 20 years ago. I got over my, you know, allergic reaction to doing commercials. I turned down a lot of commercials trying to be Bob Dylan or something in the 90s. But then by the knots, I'm like, wait a minute. This is crazy. So I did do one. Yeah, you got to take it where you can, man. Shit. I mean, most...

When I was with Ellen those years, actually, Dana, you were there too for this, but Ellen and I got offered a commercial during SNL when I wasn't even doing that good, and I wasn't allowed to do it, and I was just so...

bum that i finally would have had a little chunk of money it wasn't crazy i was like god dang i'm not allowed to because you know nbc decides did we ever talk about how much money we were making on this show no not today what did you i'll tell you what i started at 4500 an episode so you keep about 2000 a week i guess or for the 80 000 for the season i think gross

Okay, I'll go. I started at $900 a week to write and I got a $1,500 bump if I got on. I'll tell you how much I started at. Okay. $245 an episode. No. What? Nothing extra. Nothing extra if I got anything on and nothing for writing. Wow. Wait a minute. When I left there after almost five years, I was making $4,500 an episode.

Nothing for writing. And that's it. And no bumps or nothing. Yeah. Did an agent put that together? Do you have an agent back then or no? Yeah, I did.

I mean, it's sort of take it or leave it, I'm sure. Exactly. Boy, I just thought there was some union thing. I've never said it before. No, you would think there was some union thing. Go ahead. I would ask the union. They said, well, that's union minimum wage and you only work one day a week. So what is the problem? Good Lord, Alan. Damn it. God damn it. I'm fucking pissed.

Now what about Melanie Hutzel? What was she getting? Like 20 grand a week? She was getting 30 grand, yeah. Hutzel don't go down for anybody, man. She was loading it up, driving a Bentley to work. Melanie needs more money than Ellen. Now what was Melanie Hutzel getting? Your peers at the time were coming. Did you ask anyone?

No, I never did. I didn't ask anyone either. Where did you live? How did you survive on that? Exactly. Exactly. No, what helped that was that I was doing stand-up. So the weeks that we were off or whatever, then I would go to stand-up on the road. And I could make like, not that much, but at least a couple of thousand dollars. It's very rare that the stand-up is more than the work check. Yeah.

Well, in this case, it was. I know. I'm saying that's a very odd situation because I got to the point where I could make some on the weekends if I went to a college or something. But, you know, the joke of it's one day a week work is we all know is a joke because it's 24 hours a day on your mind, even on the weekend. Thank you. Yeah, there's like no job harder. I mean, in the real world of like showbiz. I mean, there's jobs harder, but.

In our little world, it's just a constant stress and anxiety.

Wow, well, that's tough to hear. I don't know. I mean, and you were doing as much as anyone. When you were getting reoccurring characters, you know, Queen Shanifa, whatever their name is. And you were kicking it on the show like that. I mean, obviously they started to bump you, but it just still never went to anything that was reasonable at all. No, they didn't bump. I got, wait, one week I got one season, the whole season, I got like $200 a week. That's true.

Children change. So it came out to be like, I don't know. I just can't. Do it. Saturday Night Live. Even Uncle Sam said we're not going to bother. Exactly. The next one was like $400 and something a week. The second year. Per show. The third year was like, yeah, per show. Then it was per show, not week per week, right? Then the next one was like $750 a week or something like that.

And then finally, it bumped up to 4,000. To like a legitimate number, like a decent number, which isn't even crazy. It isn't even a crazy high number for us. I believe, unless I got it wrong, that it was 4,500 for the whole cast because we didn't have a big cast. So it was Phil and Jan and I and whoever was coming in, I believe it was everyone was getting the same.

as far as I remember, maybe Lovett and Nora Dunn had a little more because it was their second season. You know, we all have a different situation, Dana, because I think Ellen is brought in as maybe a feature player and not even a writer, even though she wrote, obviously. I was brought in as a writer, feature player that...

they wanted me to write not really beyond so it's kind of the opposite and you I think were just brought in as a cast member but they didn't give you writing credit even though I'm sure you wrote no no you weren't looking for writing credit no one got a writing credit you couldn't get one

But we all, it's not what we do here. So you get used to it, but it was a little funny. I didn't want to write, I'd rather be a performer. Everybody's writing, I think. You know, the only one who made a joke out of it, you two could talk to that, was Chris Farley would always say, I can't think of anything, you know, but he was a brilliant performer. But that's what he said. But almost everyone was writing to some degree.

But Ellen, I'm sure to stay alive, you had to write. You weren't getting thrown in everything. No, no. But you guys hooked me up though. Be honest. No, we would try. And not just me, but me and my daughter. Every time I turned around, she was in the sketch. I think she was five and now she's probably like seven or something. She's an oral surgeon. What? Really? Really?

And she's 11? I forgot. How old is she now? That's amazing. So you're a doctorate and she's an oral surgeon. Can you imagine? I can. I have children. Yeah. No, I can't really, but that's terrific. Yeah.

So that's great. Good Lord. But here's the thing. Here's the thing when I think of Dana. Now, I didn't know Dana from nobody. So I grew up in the project. So I have my girlfriends and they start singing this thing that you used to do about broccoli. Oh, chopping broccoli. Chopping broccoli. Yeah. Chopping broccoli. Yeah.

And I'm like, what are y'all saying? We would just be dying laughing. They said, you got to see this guy. It's hysterical. And so we would tune into SNL and hopefully it came on. So luckily the day came on and,

I mean, you used to have us all dying laughing in Brooklyn with that chopping broccoli business. And then we would just mock you, not mock you or mimic you. We would do chopping broccoli whenever we would just have a moment alone or just start acting ridiculous. We'd be at a piano or something pretend.

pretend something was a piano and we were just talking about chopping broccoli. That's how you came into my life. And so when I met you, I was like, oh my God, it's the chopping broccoli guy. That is so flattering. I honestly, I love madness and silliness and catchphrases. And I love that they...

uh people sharing them i i thought it was silly and stupid but it really it even with me it goes through my head when i actually chop broccoli so i'm like a broccoli so i don't know there was a sportscaster when a guy hit a home run he was on espn he go and he is chopping broccoli so it's fun but that's cool thank you alan it just it kind of frees you up to know that anything could be funny

you know, and you could just like go for it. Just go for it. That's a good way to put it. Yeah. I think it's like verbal physical comedy in a way. In other words, when someone's laying out a riff like that, then you have permission as an audience member, you know, you don't have to really listen anymore. The guy's just going to say chopped broccoli over and over again. So you can laugh as hard as you want with Dennis Miller or something. You know, it's a very intricate kind of thing going on. So you really need to listen with that. You have to hear every word. Go crazy. And Chris Farley with his physical comedy, you just like, you know,

Robert Half Research indicates 9 out of 10 hiring managers are having difficulty hiring. If you have open roles, chances are you're feeling this too. That's why you need Robert Half. Our specialized recruiting professionals engage their skills with our award-winning AI to connect businesses of all sizes with highly skilled talent in finance and accounting, technology, marketing and creative, legal and administrative, and customer support. At Robert Half, we know talent.

Visit roberthaff.com today.

Oh, stunned and amazed. Nothing I did. I was in that sketch. That's right. There was like 95 people in that sketch. The whole cast was kind of at that punch ball in that little scene. And I assume our audience knows the character, but I didn't write it, but I was wearing a prosthetic thing that looked like I had a massive head wound. And I went to a party and mayhem ensued and a dog got hungry. That's all you need to know. Google it.

That was a sketch that like was everyone's laughing at me through my head. It made absolutely no sense. I was like, what the hell is going on? Yeah. Was it Jack Handy? There's nothing like dogs and children, I guess. And they put too much baby food on the prosthesis between dress and air. So in the air show, the dog, because I take a nap as massive heavyweight Harry and the dog comes up and wants to eat my head. But the dog wouldn't let go. The dog went crazy. I mean, and try to rip the prosthesis off, but I held it on barely.

But that was an example of the audience. It was like an I Love Lucy moment, if I could. Yeah, you were kind of trying not to laugh. We were all watching it and laughing. Nothing to do with me, really. When she's at the thing with the chocolate, doing the chocolate thing. Yeah, any time that she's doing just physical comedy, you can just hear the audience in ways and ways of laughter. But anyway.

So Ellen... Dana, I didn't ask you. I was on mute. I muted because there's a garbage truck outside. Oh. Meet, meet. But I forgot I was on mute and I was asking you a bunch of questions. I'm going to go back about a half hour. Were you...

Was Chopping Broccoli in your SNL audition? Yes. Oh, so it was all the way back there. That was such a good one because I remember Chopping Broccoli, one of the first things about you that I just thought it hit my ear. It was like, it was so clever and weird. And then you were going, Chopping Broccoli. Chop, chop, chop, chop.

And I was like, what is this fool doing? I thought it was so funny. Chop it, bongolay. Sometimes I'll do it for 10 minutes. I'm doing stand-up. You should have done it with Paul McCartney when he came on. It would have been fun. You should make him do it. You know, it's very, you know, humorous. Because, you know, why is he singing about a vegetable plant?

It's not, you know, I did let it be, you know, it's about letting go and this and that, but there's nothing really about a vegetable chopping it all the time. But I guess that's what the Americans find funny. You know, it's like I'm chopping a doobie doobie doobie do a broccoli, a doobie doobie doobie do, you know, he set me up. So Alan, let's like,

Do you want to talk about your hit characters or the ones that, there are two that really stood out as far as reoccurring. There's a page desk. Is it Zoraida? Yes, Zoraida. I love, I miss Zoraida. I miss Zoraida so much. And I guess I'm supposed to do it here. You don't have to do it. You don't have to do it. I don't know if it's politically correct to do it here.

Only because I really do speak Spanish And it's not like I don't know I didn't think about that part We can cut anything So go for it But I just love that you said you miss the character I relate to that Sometimes I'll just do characters or voices driving around By myself because I want to revisit the character You know I miss the writer so much She had so many problems Yeah

And you'd always get like the host or someone involved, right? Yeah, the host got involved. And I mean, when I first time I did it was with Michael Jordan. Wow. Whoa.

And that was like major. And he was like, he thought that was I was being ridiculous. But I was like, and I promised that I would sue him. And he thought that was hysterical. But the thing is, is that and I said, what makes you think I won't cut you? And because that is that that really did happen to me. I was on the train. And this girl did ask me, what makes you think I won't cut you? It's kind of a tough question.

Is that a rhetorical question? No. But that's a classic comedian's move is that you heard that in a real situation. And it is really funny because it's what not I'm going to cut you. What makes you think I won't cut you? That is really funny. And for you to take that and use it, it was kind of one of her. She always said that at some point or no.

Yeah, yeah, she did. What makes you think I won't cut you? That's really funny. She did it with a Spanish. What makes you think I won't cut you? But it's not just Spanish. It's really Puerto Rican, but a little Dominican. It's like this, you know, like it's very nasally. And you like got to put it in that like that. Yeah. And it's very emphatic.

Oh, yeah. What makes you think I won't cut you? You know, what did Michael Jordan say to that? He just laughed. He just looked at me and just laughed. And then I said, oh, you don't touch me. Don't hit me. I'll sue you, you know. And he was like, okay. What the fuck? Did you have to do that to read through with him? Yeah.

Yeah, that was great. How fun. Yeah, it did. How fun. What a memory. You and Michael Jordan. I mean, my God. I mean, he was, yeah. That's just hitting me funny now, the idea of a host just strolling around

On 8-H and then this page is starting to talk to him and threatening to cut him and don't think I can sue him. You know, it's just no wonder it just... How many times do you think you did that? I don't know, maybe six or eight, six times. Yeah, it was on. I did it quite a few times. But I think it kind of bothered... The one I really wanted to do it with was John Malkovich, but it didn't get on. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The thing that... But I...

I think it kind of bothered the people who were writers, you know? Right. Because like, if I went to, if I went to, if I went to Harvard to write comedy, this little scrappy Negro from the projects is over here getting shit on air. You know, I would be extremely upset.

And I, and I, they weren't, they used to really get, they used to tease me and really, they weren't very nice to me, but, um, that's Harvard. It's boys. It's boys. You know, boys are very different when you compete with boys and they don't win. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Um, so I think it was part of that. And, but, um,

That was in the past, you know, and you just got to let it go and move on. Yeah, we talked to Conan about that. Like, he felt weird. He was that had that moniker, like he's from Harvard and I went to community college. So I felt weird, like they would think I'm stupid. And, you know, I think everyone felt a little

about their upbringing getting on the show and how they got there and how they would be perceived. But, you know, if you write a sketch like that and you got Michael Jordan and he gets laughs at read-through, it's like tough shit. It's getting on. What makes you think I won't cut you? Like you could go to Yale or Harvard or Dartmouth for a long time.

but not come up, come up with that and use it in that context. So yeah, I felt the same intimidation. I went to San Francisco state. It was barely a college. Sorry, San Francisco state. And I went, and I went to community college. And then I get the SNL. It's just a lot of Ivy league stuff.

young men, you know, with dress shoes and tucked in shirts and jeans and short kind of waspy haircuts. So yeah, I got it. But yeah, so anyway, continue. Now, Ellen, did you go to the 40th? You were at the 40th, right? Yes, I was. And I think I was in it. Was it the last one? Yeah, 20. Yeah, it was the last big one. 15? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I did. I did. I did a...

oh bluetooth connecting and i gotta put my money in the payphone bluetooth connecting no i'm here i had uh i have all these things none of them are working yeah i do i'm sorry i um i teach this class i'm teaching this class here i'm at uh actually it's a school in jersey city i teach at um

I teach at the new school in Manhattan, but I also teach here in Jersey City. I just started teaching here and I'm really having a good time, huh? But it doesn't have the money. It doesn't have the money that it doesn't have the money the new school has. So I have to bring all my stuff. So I have a Bluetooth speaker. And what do you teach? Well, I teach acting. Mm hmm. Oh, cool.

And this one I'm teaching acting here at Jersey city. And then in, in, um, and I wouldn't, and the way Dana talks about comedy, I want Dana to come and be a guest at my, um, class in the new school. I teach the theory of comedy and, um, Dana really seems to. Dana has really deep thoughts about comedy. No, no. Dana's actually really good at articulating. Right. It's amazing stuff, but I, I, I am fascinated by comedy and, uh,

In all ways. And the phraseology and it's such a, you know, it's like trying to catch the wind. You never solve it completely. You never master it. It's always humbling what you think will kill and will not and so forth and so on. But do you mind just for a second? Because it's kind of I've not met any run into any ex-cast member who got a doctorate, a PhD from Tish Holtz.

School of the Arts, like what, do you talk about how that happened? I mean, when did you decide to go and how did that manifest for you? Well, I, okay, so I'm going to tell you in just a second.

So I'm teaching at the new school. And so I have comedians come in and talk to the class, et cetera, comedians and producers, et cetera. So Mike Shoemaker came in. Shoemaker, producer. Marcy Klein came in. Marcy. And Tim Meadows. Timmy. Came and talked to the. Nice. And I use recordings from different, like I use Chris Rock and I use different people's recordings. Anyway.

So many, like maybe in 2007 or 2006, I was doing a radio show with Paul Mooney and I was writing for him. And in New York city,

And he just never came. Like the show was from six in the morning to 10 and 10 in the morning. So he would show up, you know, how radio is. You started six. It starts at six. Good morning, America. And he would show up maybe seven. And then he would have been out all night. And so he would sleep. Right. So I had signed a contract with them.

So when they when they let him go, I couldn't get out of my contract. Otherwise, I would have to pay them all that money back. And I was like, that's not going to happen. And so I was like, hmm. So he was mad that I stayed. And I was like, no, I can't. I got it's not going to work. I'm sorry. We'll just have to be angry at one another.

So I said, well, Ellen, what are you going to do? What are you going to do? Because this is going to keep coming up, you know, whatever. And I said, well, what would you really do if you could do anything? Because I had this chunk of money. I said, well, I would like to get a master's degree.

from someplace. So I applied to NYU. I said, it's something you've always wanted to do. And I said, okay. And plus I was also, if I can be really honest with you, I was tired of hearing people say, you know, I have a master's degree. You know, when I got my master's degree and I was like, so sick of hearing people say that. I had an undergrad degree, but you know, I guess that wasn't enough. So I said, okay, I'll go back and do it. So I went and got it.

I got into the school. I applied to Tisch and I got in. And so then I took it. So then while I was there, this girl said to me, she said, whatever you do,

don't stay stick around for the phd and i was like what why not so because they're gonna they're gonna ask you to write something you know these white people always want to steal your writing and i was like really david and i have that problem too you know yeah that's a good idea i want to read it so i can take it okay well that's that's really practical advice i said i said i i

Yeah. So I said, as a matter of fact, so because she told me not to, I said, okay, I'm gonna, I'm going to apply. All I can say is no. So I apply and comes to find out she had applied as well. So she was trying to thin the herd so that there wouldn't be any competition. You get it? Oh no, I totally get it. It's a sabotage. Subtle to be a friend. She's taking you out of the competition. Good. Subtle touch. Right. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

So then I got in and I said, okay, well, let's see what happens. And they kept saying, what are you doing here? And I was like, what does one do here? So it was that constant back and forth. So they weren't, you know, it's a very competitive business. It's more cutthroat than show business. No.

Really? And people are not as, yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Just competing with who's more, who's smarter? Why are they, did they only give one at the end or doesn't everybody get it? No, they give, they give, they give out. Okay. So a hundred people will apply and there's six slots. There you go. Wow. And you go, that's great. And the thing is, the thing is they pay you. Oh, so it's like a salary position to be a PhD candidate. Got it. Okay.

I mean, it's not a lot of money. It's not a lot of money by any stretch of the imagination. Is it over $245,000? Exactly.

It's about even. It's about the same. The SNL people called them. She's really good at 245. She'll take 245. It's a good number for Ellen. She does very well. I think 245 would be... Across the board, rest of her life. She really shouldn't go for a PhD because my nephew wants to get... Sorry. Go ahead. So what...

I love your laugh. I can't see it. Yeah, she's got a good laugh. It hurt. You really? No, but when I hear Dana, Dana really hurts my stomach. I don't know what that is. It's too silly and funny. It makes me laugh hard. Well, thank you for your support. You're so sweet. Toyota's national sales event is happening now, meaning it's a great time for a great deal on a dependable Toyota truck.

Like the Tundra, Workhorse by Nature, Powerhouse by Design combines raw capability with premium comfort and advanced tech to fuel your wildest adventures.

With the available i-Force Max hybrid powertrain, you can take electrifying horsepower farther than ever before. Or check out the fully designed Tacoma, delivering trail-dominating power and captivating style. The new Tacoma was born to make your off-roading dreams come true. And with new available tech, this legendary truck is getting even better.

Visit buyatoyota.com, the official website for deals. All new Toyotas come with ToyotaCare, a no-cost maintenance plan. See your dealer or visit buyatoyota.com for details. Let's go places.

As a Ford owner, there are lots of choices of where you get your vehicle serviced. You can choose to go to their place, the local dealership, your place, home, apartment, condo, your workplace, even your happy place, like your cottage on the lake. Go to your Ford dealer and choose Ford pickup and delivery to have your vehicle picked up, serviced, and brought right back.

Or choose mobile service where a technician will come to you and do routine maintenance right on the spot. Both are complimentary and depend on your location. That's ownership built around you. Contact your participating dealer or visit FordService.com for important details and limitations. Alan, what was your doctoral thesis on?

It was on African-American humor in social context. What is there to say about that? From the civil rights era to Barack Obama. So what was it, 9,000 pages? It was about 400 pages, 300 to 400 pages. I kind of feel like, and I don't know if it's fair or not, but it feels like there's like a heavyweight crown for who's the best stand-up in the world at any given time.

And I think you could say like Carlin to Pryor to Steve Martin to Robin Williams. And then I'm not really sure where you went from there, but I know at one point Chris Rock was...

The champion. Chris Rock stands the test of time. Yeah. His stand up. And I mean, I say this because I've been studying it. I'm not saying that because I know him or whatever, but his when I play it for the kids, they get it. It hits it hits hard all the time. And so, you know, that really works. You know why? He went on the other night. I was at the comedy store. He came in and went on.

It's still, you know, he's working on new stuff and it's just as good. You just sit there and go, wow, he put that together nicely. Like he still knows what he's doing. He's still sharp. It's just exactly what you would think. Even Kevin Hart went on. I'd never seen Kevin Hart go on and he did a great job. Everyone did a set, you know, it was kind of fun. Does, Alan, going back to Dr. Dr. Claghorn for a second. Yeah.

I always thought Chris was really great at the elephant in the room or summing up a social trend with a phrase and then working that idea for a long, long time. He seemed to be very, very good about it. I remember during the Clarence Thomas hearings with Anita Hill and all that stuff. And then he did a thing about no woman ever accuses Denzel Washington of harassment or something like that. But he did it in the Chris Rock way.

And it was just a funny observation. You know what I mean? You'll never find a woman. That Denzel won't leave me alone.

You know, someone do something. Well, I had the opportunity to meet Denzel and I went to see him on Broadway when he was doing Julius Caesar. And so backstage and I reached out to shake his hand and I'm going to tell you something. Like butter, his hands were so soft. You fell for it too. His hands were so soft. Were they soft? I lost my mind. Were they moist and soft like Bill Clinton or just soft? Soft.

No, no, not moist and soft. No, they were not moist. They were just soft. Don't add moist. Like they made you, no, moist is terrible. He made me lose my voice. What? Oh, so was it a little bit electric? Cause he's Denzel Washington, you know, in a, in a way of just meeting someone who, you know, is just really charismatic sex symbol. I mean, he is, he's Denzel Washington, right? So did he get you a little weak need in a way?

Well, no, my knees didn't get weak. I actually just lost my voice and all I could focus on was his hands. They were so fucking soft. I said, what is this? Maybe he's not a real person or something. No, I couldn't say. No, I couldn't even speak. I lost my voice. I'll ask. I'll DM him on Instagram. I'll get to the bottom of this.

But I did write a poem. I did write him a poem. And I don't remember. I have to find it. But I did write him a poem. And I was doing the radio show in New York at the time. And I read it to him over the air. And I don't... Was it... Okay. What was it about? Denzel? I...

What would be the subject about a poem about Denzel? It's about his hands, Dana. How she got into it. Soft hands for a strong man. He was doing Julius Caesar on Broadway. Et tu, Brute? Et tu, Brute? Yeah. Ixnay on the...

Hands as soft as a baby bootay. Dennis Miller was playing Prospero in The Tempest at the Herald. How do you even know what those words are? Trying to get my inner, you know, Mickey Rooney going way back, a 1930s actor. I remember they told him, Mickey, you can't change your lines. The camera isn't where you are. He goes, the only writers whose lines you can't change are Bill Shakespeare. Shakespeare.

I just love when I go Bill Shakespeare I like Mickey Rooney Mickey Rooney I liked him when he was in some movie with Judy Garland but I used to love those kind of movies in the afternoon on the TV because that's all they would show and around Christmas time he was always playing a rich guy and he was two feet tall and I guess he played a child for a long time

And then he was a man child. They always were. It was like Judy Garland and they were like playing like sophomores in high school. At one point they go, I know we could put on a show. And then they would all start singing and dancing and they would sing like the wind and dance and Mickey could do it all. Believe me. Ellen, who were you? I got a barn.

Oh, I got a barn. We could throw this thing together by 6 p.m. Yeah. Yeah, you'll get the stage. Somebody get the cows out. Why, Uncle Willie's electrical stores, we could get a microphone. I'll put all the cows to sleep. I'll make a hat out of hay. You don't have to kill them. You don't have to kill them. Just walk them out back. Also, some moccasins.

Yeah. Those were those great, you know, they made like 10 of those. At least. Do we have a costumer on the ranch? We do? Betty. Betty, can you make 100 costumes by tonight? Of course. Got the train, train coming in town, town, town. Woo, woo.

Got the train coming in Gonna laugh, laugh, laugh in the town All right. Sorry. Train coming in in the town, town, town. It's a huge hit that... Oh, yeah. Let's ask Aaron about the 40th. We got cut off. Did you like going to the 40th? Did you have fun there? And what sketch were you in? I did a sketch with Jerry Seinfeld. Whoa. Um...

And I was up in the audience on the side with all the kids that I guess are not the celebrities. Okay. You got in the building though. That's good. Victoria Jackson was on the sixth floor. I can't even see. I don't know where I am. Go ahead. They let Beth Cahill drive by and beep. But they told me absolutely no plus ones. They said, no, there's absolutely, because you're going to be in the audience and whatever, whatever.

And I apologize. I brought my daughter with me. Oh, you did? They let you? Yeah, I did. Yeah, they let me bring her in. She didn't sit in the audience with me. Special. But they let her bring in the building. Maybe she was in the spillover room. Yeah, she was. I think she was. So what happened? Did you ask a question to Seinfeld or something? Was there a Q&A? Yeah.

I asked Jerry Seinfeld a question, how come there's no black women on his show? Oh, my God. Yeah. What was his answer? He said, I'm sorry, I didn't save the world or something like that. Oh. Then I had a follow up question. I don't remember what it was. But the thing that I like, the trivia part about that was that Mulaney wrote that sketch. John Mulaney.

Oh. So I felt real special. I feel connected to pop culture. Do you feel like you might be the godmother to his baby in a way? No.

hope at least the baby could call me auntie. The sad thing is that I follow all that crap on the Instagram. Oh, me too. It's sad. I do too. There's rumors that Pete Davidson is the actual father. I don't believe any of this nonsense. I don't buy any of this tabloid stuff. That baby looks just like Mulaney. He was putting it in a crock pot or something a day later. Do you see that picture? I'm like, what's happening? No,

Yeah, he's like putting it in a public of what's going on. You can really work a baby now. You're doing baby bits? But he said he's paying the baby $245 a week for all the Instagram. The baby gets $250. It's perfect for a baby. They get Gerber food, more diapers, maybe a little teddy.

It's a perfect fee for all humans. I like the tone of this show. This is very great. Ellen, did you know that Jerry Seinfeld has a new comedy album coming out called Paperclips? Why? You're such an idiot. You always...

You almost had me. By the way, it should be. That's funny. Paperclips, why? Because he would do 20 minutes on a paperclip. When the stapler came out, the paperclip's like, oh, no. We're over. We're so over. I'm Jerry Seinfeld. Good night. Sorry. Go ahead. Then he comes back and he goes, I forgot to talk about Pop-Tarts. He has a Pop-Tart movie. Jerry, you know what? He does not.

He does. This goes full circle. My friend is in it. This goes full circle to our doctor. Yes. So Jerry Seinfeld, over a period of years, and he was in the New York Times, he was trying to complete a bit about Pop-Tarts, and he couldn't get it to work. And he spent years on it, because you know how Jerry is. Cracking the code.

Pop-tots, because he'd say all this stuff. We saw a pop-top, we're 10 years old, our heads exploded, whatever. But when I meet, when I run into Jerry, I want to tell him, Jerry, there was one fatal flaw from my point of view. And we had two day old baked goods, five kids. Dad was a high school teacher.

No one really liked Pop-Tarts that much compared to Hostess, Berry Pies, or Twinkies, or Snowballs, or regular cupcakes. Comment, Professor.

Wow. Let me tell you, those toasted berry pies were the jam. Are you talking about the cherry apple pie? Like whatever? They were magic. They were magic. Those are unreal. And the Pop-Tarts were okay, but they were a little sweet and narrow. You put them in the toaster. They were fine, but they weren't... Jerry...

Jerry's bit treated them like they were the greatest. Dana, do you want to hear some bullshit? Now that you brought it up and I would never brought this up. I would break off the crust on the edges before it got to the frosting. And I said, fuck it. I just wanted the parts that had frosting on them.

Because Pop-Tarts were not all the way to the Pop-Tart. I can't believe you're revealing this. I know, and I was going to save this. I'm checking Daily Mail right now. Is this already going viral? In the UK version, you're both trending. Wow. Hashtag. Spade destroys Pop-Tart. I didn't even know what Carves were. I just knew that I didn't really like that edge until I got to the frosting. So just break it off.

I was a fucking rebel. Yeah. But was it cherry or apple? What was your favorite? I liked it on the pies. On the pies at 7-Eleven, I liked cherry or apple. That's a tough one. I would black out quickly after because all the sugar, but I also liked ding-dongs. Ding-dongs sounds like a comedy punchline. I like Twinkies, yeah. Ding-dongs is a funny one. What happened to your ding-dong? You know what I mean? It just sounds funny. I don't know. Oh, I thought you were really asking me because something did happen to my ding-dong recently. Ding-dong?

Ellen, you're like, why did I get on the Wi-Fi? All right, we'll edit this. And now we're back with Ellen Claghorn on Fly on the Wall. We just took a short break. We have time for a couple more quick questions. We're not cutting inappropriate material. What else did we not ask her, Dana? Why is she so awesome was my first question. Yeah, why is she so smart? Can I talk to you about this, Dave Spade?

Yeah. Now, did you know, does everybody know that you used to ride the skateboard and you were riding the skateboard in that movie? The police academy. Yes.

Before SNL. So I'm like, oh, he really had it going on. You knew all about the red carpet and blah, blah, blah, before we even got there. No, you know, Ellen, the true story is that I was, I got out to LA and I'm from Arizona and I did skateboard. And the only reason I got that audition, I couldn't really act, but this is just the luck of the draw. They saw me at the improv. I didn't look like everyone else. I just had long blonde hair and I was 20 and they said,

Oh, you know what? We need a kid to play a skateboarder, but we didn't think of it. But this kid could probably pull off high school. So I go in and they go, did you get the script? I go, no. And they said, shoot, we have one here. And they didn't have one. And they go, shit. Oh, we don't want to waste your time.

It's just about a skateboarder. Maybe you could just improv a few lines. And this is so lucky, Ellen, because I didn't know how to read a script. I didn't know how to hold sides. I didn't know. I would have shown how green I was and how new. So I just said, yeah, oh, I'm a skateboarder. You got an attitude and the cops are coming up. I'm like, hey, guys, I just start making up shit, you know, and saying skateboard terms. And they were like, oh, that's exactly what we need. Okay, great. You know, let's get this guy.

And if they would have let me act, it would not have worked because they would have seen. So just improv-ing and bullshitting was what I was better at than actually reading a script. And so I got out there. I got 25 grand, which is great. 10 weeks. 25 grand? Yeah, so I got 2,500. It would take Ellen three years to get that much based on her- Fucking 200 years to get that much. I can't even do the math. I know. She can't even comprehend these. She goes, you mean $25? I go, nope. $25. $25.

So I go, it's your first job, 25 grand for riding a skateboard. What the fuck? And I get to ride with Tony Hawk and all these guys, Mike McGill. So I do, uh, I go 10 weeks in Toronto and I get a per diem. This is why people get hooked on acting. So I do it. I come back with Ellen. I cleared 10 from all, you know, all the bullshit, the,

I woke up like Canadian tax and then, you know, whatever. So I pay everything. I give my mom three for bills. I do one in bills, but I needed a car. 6,000 left after 10 weeks. I go up and I buy a Honda Accord. I drive it to the improv and it got stolen that night. Oh!

So I was back to zero, no insurance. And I just did 10 weeks on the road and I came back, I have nothing to show for it. And the next night Jay Leno showed up at the Improv at a Honda Accord. I never understood that. You know, it was just parked. You know, I usually drive the motorcycle, but you know, it's got three cylinders, but it was fine, you know. No, that's a bummer. The Improv, not the comedy store, the Improv. No, the Improv was sketchy. Yeah, it was over on Kilkeya.

This is the street right next to the improv. I came out to show Tim Rose's comic. I go, check out this sweet pimp sled I just bought. Very sensible pimp sled. And it was gone. I go, maybe it's this other street. I go, and he started going, uh-oh. I go, there's no fucking way. No way.

I think they followed me with a key to the car, honestly, the people that sold it to me and just took it. That's a, that's an empty feeling. Anyway, I was just saying that to say, that is a great story. It sounded great. And then another, and then I started auditioning and I wasn't any good. So I was just like bombing. And then I had two years of just scraping and then, uh,

Then it started to pick up a little more. But by the time I got to SNL, I'd already been like humbled. I'm like, shit, this has got to work because I got like nothing clicking. No other movies in that gap of like four years. And then you hit big with all those movies with Chris. Tommy Boy. Yeah.

Yeah. I got lucky with that too. So, and that was direct result of like the show and Bonnie and Terry wrote that first one and then Fred Wolf took over, but Bonnie and Terry worked on that first draft of Tommy Boy.

And then we did Black Sheep. And then I was really jealous of those Chris Farley shows because he got to have a big host like McCartney and he got to talk to him and go, remember when you were in the Beatles? Yeah. Chris has some very memorable sketches. Did Downey write that one based on just how he was at the office? It sounded so like Chris. So real, yeah. And it was hysterical.

Okay, when you're hiring for your small business, you want to find quality professionals that are right for the role, obviously. That's why you have to check out LinkedIn Jobs. Everyone knows LinkedIn, but LinkedIn Jobs has the tools to help find the right professionals for your team faster and for free. That's right. You need good people, Dana.

You do, David. And newsflash, LinkedIn isn't just a job board. LinkedIn helps you hire professionals you can't find anywhere else. Even those who aren't actively searching for a new job, it might be open to the perfect role. In a given month, David, check this out, write it down if you want to, over 70% of LinkedIn users don't visit other leading job sites. So if you're not looking on LinkedIn,

You're looking in the wrong place. Well, because they get what they want from LinkedIn. So why look around? On LinkedIn, 86% of small businesses get a qualified candidate within 24 hours. That's one day according to my calculations. That's right. And LinkedIn knows that small businesses are wearing so many hats that might not have the time and or resources to hire. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. They're constantly finding ways to make the process easier, even though it's easy already. Yeah.

They launched a feature that helps you write job descriptions, make it even easier if you want to post something, you know. That's right. Quicker. 2.5 million small businesses use LinkedIn for hiring. Listen, post your job for free at LinkedIn.com slash candidates. That's LinkedIn.com slash candidates to post your job for free. As always, terms and conditions apply. You know, Rosetta Stone, the most trusted language learning program.

If you want to learn a new language, which no time like the present, it's always fun to learn when you get older. I know. And it's not learning a language when you're older, you know, over the age of 20 is difficult. You know, I mean, all the high school Spanish I took, grade school Spanish, you know, all I can say is hola.

And hasta luego. So it goes out of your head. So now you have Rosetta Stone, David, tell them about it. Well, Dana, you know, more than anyone trusted expert for 30 years with millions of users in 25 languages. Uh, I mean, my gosh, they have Spanish, French, Italian, German. I don't think you can throw them a curve ball. I think they're going to know what don't they have the language you want. Yeah.

It immerses you in many ways. There's no English translations. You understand? I know no English. You need a Rosetta Stone for English. No English translation. So you really learn to speak and listen and think in that language. That's the whole idea of Rosetta Stone is that it sticks to your head. It sticks to your brain. I learned German out of a book. It just doesn't stick as hard. So this is the way to do it. Just don't type.

Designed for long term retention.

There's a true accent feature. It gives you feedback on your pronunciation. Yes. And of course, there's desktop app options. There's an audio companion and ability to download lessons offline. Yeah, so that's great. Lifetime access to all 25 language courses Rosetta Stone offers for 50% off. A steal! And I do think that the off-label thing that... I'm ad-libbing now, going off script.

is that when you learn a language and you learn to pronunciate the words in that language, you start to learn about the people who live there and speak that language. Sort of a subtle, intuitive way of integrating with the culture. A little different, yeah. Don't put off learning that language. There's no better time than right now to get started. For a very limited time, Fly on the Wall listeners can get Rosetta Stone's lifetime membership for 50% off.

You just visit rosettastone.com slash fly. That's 50% off, unlimited access to 25 language courses for the rest of your life. Redeem your 50% off at rosettastone.com slash fly today. I don't know, Dana, anything else? What do you got? Anything you want to tell her? Your hopes, your dreams. Just want to hang out with you. Yeah, Alan was fun. A lot of times that happens on this show because we're getting to see people that...

we worked with and adore and had fun with and then we don't see them all these years and so this is really fun it's a good hangout yeah but i want you to come i want both of you to come to my class at the new school and like zoom in and teach the kids talk to the kids they would love it kids what you don't understand is the highest peak of money is 245.

And this is your highest goal. I'm going to have a pipe and an ascot and be in front of a fireplace. What you have to understand about comedy is that it's not really comedy. It's tragedy. Tragedy posing as comedy.

And the thing about, I would love to come on and talk to the kids. You mean on zoom? I can do that from where I am now in Missoula, Montana. Is that where you are in Montana? That's where I was born, but no, I'm in Southern California, but yeah, you do guests on zoom and they just talk to the kids about comedy. Yeah. Yeah. I,

I really enjoy you guys in person and that, but, but I really liked the most is Davis made doing Dana Carvey doing something. I had chopping broccoli. Yeah. Cause I used to sing that around. I go, God damn, this is funny. And it was sort of out of what I think like, and I'm like, this is so weird and goofy. And,

Just clever and smart because of its goofiness, but there's some, there's method to the madness of why it's so funny. Can we get a little chorus of it as we fade out here? Chopping maca. He goes low. I'm chopping maca. She chop. She chop. Yeah, he goes into it. That's toward the end. She chop. Yeah, yeah. You got to get there. You got to work up to it. Yeah. All right, Alan. Thank you, hon.

Hey, what's up, flies? What's up, fleas? What's up, people that listen? We want to hear from you and your dumb questions. Questions, ask us anything. Anything you want. You can email us at flyonthewallatcadence13.com. Can you guys provide perspective on how it was viewed to break character on SNL?

asking because Spade stands out in my mind where he and Christina Applegate, of course, we laughed on the couch during motivational speaker. And in Lorne's voice for Dana, how was that viewed? Brian Steele. It's so, if you're going to break, it's that other type of joke. It's like fucking Carol Burnett.

I mean, it's really not what we do. So you were not supposed to break when I got there. Yeah. And then it started to erode. And then you, David Spade, were in one of Chris Farley's shows.

his biggest moment on the show probably and it was hard not to break go talk to that sketch almost anyone would have brought that was uh and we'll probably have christine applegate on soon and we'll talk about it uh but it was and i see here over the years we've mentioned it to each other because it's turned into such a thing but it was uh not planned and uh

You're not supposed to break and you also could get fired. Dana knows it. I know it. It was the word around town and it is not Lauren telling you that it's other people, you know, the other people around going, Oh no, Lauren does not like that. So yeah,

You could get fired. And so when you do it, it's fun. But afterwards, you don't want to walk by him and go, okay, Tim Conway. Not a guy. Wasn't he on California? Yeah. Tim Conway, Harvey Korman, who were brilliant. And also Tim Conway, when they were on their sort of air show, live taping would just switch stuff out.

And that's how he would destroy Harvey Korman. If someone improvises outside their bandwidth on Saturday Night Live, that might make someone break, you know? Yeah. And they did it more in the future episodes and got away with it. And it is fun. It's always fun to watch that stuff. It can't be used as a trick. If the sketch isn't doing well, you can't do fun. Right. It can't be a crutch. But if it's organic, I think it is entertaining. Yeah.

Yeah, and thank you, Brian, for listening, and thank you for your question. Where's Brian from? Probably Bulgaria. I don't know what to say. It's just a guess. Fly on the Wall has been a presentation of Cadence 13. Please listen, then rate, review, and follow all episodes. Executive produced by Dana Carvey and David Spade, Chris Corcoran of Cadence 13, and Charlie Finan of Brillstein Entertainment. Production and engineering led by Greg Holtzman.