Resilience: Kreacher’s Tale (Book 7, Chapter 10)
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So,

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Go to bluelizardsunscreen.com to find out more information, which sunscreens are right for your family and where you can buy in-store, or visit the Blue Lizard Australian Sunscreen Store on Amazon. Chapter 10, Creature's Tale. Harry woke early next morning, wrapped in a sleeping bag on the drawing room floor. A chink of sky was visible between the heavy curtains. I'm Caspar Turk-Isle. And I'm Vanessa Zoltan.

And this is Harry Potter and the Sacred Text. So Casper, we have a couple of announcements before we jump in. We have an Outlander pilgrimage. We are going to travel back to the 18th century. That is how good I've gotten at travel planning with these pilgrimages. We are going to read Diana Gabaldon's novel Outlander, one of my favorite novels through the theme of fate.

And we are staying at this incredible venue where most of the food is grown on site. And this is going to be our hikiest pilgrimage ever. We're going to like actually hike mountains in a day. And we've hired these incredible Scottish hiking guides and

And I'm faculty along with Julia Argi and everyone. You can learn more about that at reading and walking with.com. Our only other announcement is our every flavored bean this week. Casper, what have we got for our bonus Patreon only conversation?

Well, inspired by Harry going into Sirius's room, we're going to talk about rooms we wish we could walk into for the first time. So maybe a room that we've already been in that we really love or an imaginary room that we would love to walk into. So come join our Every Flavoured Bean conversation if you're a patron. And thanks to everyone who supports the show. So Vanessa, this week, our theme is resilience. What is your story for us today?

So, Casper, Julia Argy and I decided to walk the Wicklow Way 10 years ago, almost exactly 10 years ago. And the Wicklow Way is a week long through hike in Ireland. Julia and I decided to do four days of it. We walked from Dublin, from like central Dublin to Glendalough.

Billock, Ireland. And it is just absolutely beautiful. And a lot of people day hike on it. It's similar to the Appalachian Trail where like most people will take little day hikes on it and then some people will through hike it. I told Julia I will follow her across the Wicklow Way as long as I don't have to carry camping supplies.

So I was like, I can walk a lot, but I don't want to carry pots and pans and stuff. I need a bed at night. I was already 32 years old. I was like, this is my requirement.

First night, we hike like 16 miles. We arrive at this beautiful hostel. The hostel is empty except for us because it's like one of the last days that the trail is open for the year. We had so much fun. We made ourselves a huge dinner. We carried groceries from Dublin, made ourselves a huge dinner, made ourselves a huge breakfast the following morning. And we had enough food to make ourselves each something.

six peanut butter sandwiches to get us through the second full day of walking to our next place where we were staying. The second day was going to be 25 miles. And I was like, 25 miles, no problem. My brother is a marathon runner. He runs 26 miles. I can slowly walk 25 miles. I grew up in LA with real mountains, Ireland, hills, no problem.

Needless to say, by mile 20, I was feeling very different.

And I got sulky about it. I was like, Julia, I would like a cab to come pick us up. Julia was like, dude, if you would let us carry our own supplies, we could just stop right now. But you didn't. We are out of peanut butter and chocolate sandwiches. We don't have any gear. We have to walk to the town that is out of our way because you said you needed a bed. In which case,

I not only had to keep going, but I had to pretend to have a good attitude about it. And so we called it Motown Mountain and we sang Motown songs all the way up the mountain. And was I resilient in this? Yes. I would argue that I was more resigned than resilient. And I would like for us to talk about that because I'm not sure what my other option was. But yes, I was resilient. So we finally arrive after...

our B&B and we're like so hungry. The lovely B&B lady was like, tomorrow morning, do you want two eggs or three? We were like three. She was like, are you going to want to your coffee? We were like both. You know, we were just like so hungry.

And then we were like, where can we go for dinner? We need dinner. And she was like, well, there are two pubs in town. One is right across the way and it's pretty good. And one is about two tenths of a mile down the road. It's a three minute walk and it's one of the best pubs in Ireland. And I looked at Julia and I said, I want to go to the one across the road.

Because that is where my resilience ended. I was like, I did the thing. And that's the thing about resilience, right? Resilience is not about thriving. Resilience is about bouncing back. It is about doing enough. And so I would like to argue that I could have theoretically had the best meal in Ireland, but I was resilient and nothing more. And also, Casper, not going to lie,

That was one of the best meals of my life. And any difference between those two pubs would have been lost on me.

I like that idea that resilience is about like doing enough to get you to where you needed to go because you would have totally been capable of walking that little bit extra to go to this, you know, lovely pub. But you were like, no, I've done what I said I would do. I pushed really hard to get here actually. And like, this is enough. So I like that definition of resilience.

I think resilience now is quite in vogue, you know, like this idea of grit and like being able, you know, that learning isn't about like achieving a certain mark. It's about like, how do you respond when you fail? Which all of it is wonderful. Like, and that's great. And we all need those things. And we should set up our education system to support that kind of resilience and learning. But yeah.

It also has a side of which, which is like, okay, so maybe achievement isn't everything. It's about like keeping going because the next day you could continue. And if you had pushed yourself to breaking point, by which I mean going to the pub, which is two minutes away. Like maybe you wouldn't have done it the next day. You know what I mean? And so you were judging your own capacity and being like, this is what I got.

And this pub is going to be just fine. If she had said it's the worst pub in Ireland, that's opposite. Yeah. And it's, you know, something that's like good enough two fifths of a mile away. I think you might've said, okay, I'll do it. But because it was good enough. Great. Yeah. But,

But Vanessa, before we talk more about resilience, let's remind ourselves what happens in this quite fascinating chapter. And I am not embarrassed to say that there was new information here for me. Reading it maybe for the third or fourth time, some details had skipped. At least four. Yeah, 100%. So would you count me in? It would be a pleasure. On your mark, get set, go.

So Harry wakes up and sees Hermione and Ron still fast asleep. And he's like, you know, I'm just going to get out and discover what's in this house. And so he starts looking around, trying to find something. And what he finds is a beautiful letter that his mother wrote about him as a child to Sirius. He goes into Sirius' room for the first time.

It's covered in Gryffindor paraphernalia. And then he finds a photograph of himself zooming around on this little broom that Ciri has got for him. And it's so cute. Wow, you didn't even touch what actually happens in the chapter. This all happened in the chapter two. There may be more important things, but it's a really sentimental moment. And like, I kind of forgot about this letter. It's really lovely.

I was like, Lily is amazing. I would have been her friend. Oh, she is amazing. Okay, tell me about the rest of the chapter. You've got 30 seconds on the clock. Here we go. Three, two, one.

Two, one. The chapter's called Creature's Tale. So we hear a tale of creature in which he once went in order to test out the boat and test out everything that Dumbledore and Harry did in the last book. He went with Regulus and Voldemort didn't see that coming. And so he has the locket, but Mundungus stole the locket.

And so now we know that the locket does exist and R.E.B. was Regulus Hyman Black Sirius's brother.

In our defense, and that was better than mine, I will start with that. But our efforts were hampered by our health. We are both not operating at 100% capacity. And folks, I know you could do better at home. And I invite you to pause and do a 30-second recap for yourself because that may be more fruitful than what we just offered you. Fine. It was you struggling to remember Voldemort's name that got it for me. Okay.

know what you're talking about i did great well the good news is this theme of resilience was actually very present i thought in this chapter in because it opens with this really sweet scene as i said where harry wakes up and he sees ron and hermione and they're both still fast asleep and their hands are right next to each other as if they'd fallen asleep holding hands

And for me, that was just such an interesting image of resilience because it spoke to their connection to one another. It spoke to their relationship. And it immediately made me think about, you know, there's a famous study of a heat wave in Chicago and why you have these pockets where people, mostly elderly people died because they couldn't get out of the building. There were issues in public infrastructure. And so there were these pockets where there were real spikes in the number of people who perished. And it was the same areas where people didn't know their neighbors. Mm-hmm.

And so there's really interesting data that suggests, especially in moments of crisis, the best indicator for survival is your relationships with the people who live literally above, below and next to you. And this was such a sweet moment of Ron and Hermione falling asleep, kind of holding hands. And it speaks to the way in which they have each other's back with Harry, of course, too. But I thought that was such a,

a beautiful image of resilience, that it is our community. It is our connections which make us resilient to crisis. And they are in a crisis right now, right? They've just escaped this attack from the Death Eaters. They've just escaped the wedding before that where the Death Eaters arrived. And so they're in the midst of this trauma and all they have is each other. And I don't know, it made me think about what's going to come later in this book where that relationship breaks down and the way in which they

become more vulnerable because of that. And of course, how strong they get again once Ron returns later in the book.

Yeah, and we also see Harry goes wandering around the house in this chapter, and Hermione immediately starts looking for him, as does Ron. They're immediately worried about him, and nothing has happened. But I think that that speaks to your point of Harry wouldn't be able to go missing for long because these two people are so attuned to every movement of his.

Yeah, this idea that community allows for more resilience, I think is...

is right. You can bounce back from more if you have support. Which is an interesting contrast with Creature, who's been so isolated in this house for so long. Yeah. And Harry wonders at the end of the chapter, like, dude, you were basically left for dead by Voldemort. Like, you saw your beloved Regulus turn on Voldemort. Why are you still upholding these horrific beliefs? And...

the answer to that is, well, Narcissa and Bellatrix, you know, have still treated you nicely, right? Like the answer is in the relationships that Creature has kind of, or the closest he has to them. I'm thinking out loud a little bit here, but it strikes me that like his isolation, um,

Which you could read as like he wants to be alone, but I don't think that's true. Like I think he's finding connection in the very few places that are offered to him. And it's why he never felt that connection with Sirius because Sirius was so awful to Creature. So that sense of like he's not very resilient, right? Like he is struggling to survive and the few places of relationship that he does find, of course they're using him. But it's an interesting contrast, I think, with the trio to see Creature so isolated. Yeah.

Well, resilience means bouncing back, right? It doesn't mean surviving. Right. It's more than surviving. It's going back to a kind of normal. And I think, you know, you and I both grew up around people with a lot of trauma who parts of them survived and parts of them were resilient, but parts potentially never bounced back.

And I think that the story that Creature is telling himself about Narcissa and Bellatrix is his attempt at resilience, right? You know, I think a lot about the woman Elizabeth Smart who was very resilient through getting kidnapped and tortured. And she talks about how every day she told herself a story that her mother was looking for her. And it turned out to be true. But, right, like, that belief that...

I am loved out there. Someone is looking for me, right? That that allowed for a certain kind of resilience. And I think Creature creating that story, even though we know that Bellatrix and Narcissa don't care about Creature and really do see him entirely as a piece of property. I think that that speaks to some deep desire to survive within Creature that he is holding on to whatever little bits

people will throw at him. And we'll see that in the coming chapters when Ron, Hermione, and Harry start being nice to Creature, how much he starts to thrive. I think that we are seeing how deeply resilient Creature is because he is surviving on so little. Mm-hmm.

I really like this definition that it's about returning to a state that you were in previously. I'm imagining a sort of like graph with a danger or like three different zones, like a thriving, like every day is a festival day, like Christmas cakes for everybody. I'm changing and growing and flourishing. Yeah, exactly. I'm winning prizes. I'm falling in love. Like flowers are blooming. Right. And then there's at the bottom of the graph is this sort of like boundless

barely surviving, right? Just making it through. Or decaying, right? Or decaying, right? I'm like actively getting worse. Yeah, that's helpful. And then the middle zone is this kind of, I don't want to call it zone of normal, but like a healthy middle zone. And if you start there, resilience is being able to get better.

back into there. So it's not quite thriving. It's not decaying. It's getting back there. And I guess one of the questions I have for you, which showed up for me in this chapter too, is the difference between like powerhouse

like endurance, something staying the same and something bouncing back, but maybe coming back in a different way. Because I saw it in Sirius's bedroom where Harry is trying to like take something off the wall or he's trying to, you know, he's engaging with the room and clearly they've been charmed by,

up to the hocus pocus because he literally cannot get things off the wall. And that was in his mind, serious being like, I'm a Gryffindor. My parents are not going to change this room once I leave for Hogwarts. I'm making this permanent. But is, is that resilience? Yeah. It's such a good question as to whether something being static is resilient. I obviously can't think about this without thinking about my grandparents as survivors. And I,

People would say to me, and I'm guessing to my grandparents too, that there was something so amazing about them surviving. And my grandfather really resisted that. He was like, there's nothing heroic about the luck of surviving. And really believing also it was about what you did with your life afterwards and that he didn't judge people who didn't. Your body could survive without your soul and heart surviving.

Even my grandfather, my dad's dad died in 1970. But my father absolutely thinks of him as a victim of the Holocaust because he got so sick. His heart was so thoroughly weakened during the concentration camp. So, right, like he never bounced back to normal health, right? None of my grandparents did. My grandmother's back disintegrated in her 70s, right? She had to have concrete put in her back. So it's like sometimes...

There's a permanence, like my grandparents literally survived, but there wasn't complete resilience there, right? Like parts of them didn't. And that's just talking about their body parts. Oh, that opens up a whole other question of the ways in which we kind of like

glorify resilience, I think. That if you're not resilient, you are bad or like you failed in some way. And like there are some situations to which resilience is impossible. Or like your grandfather would say, like partly kind of luck of the draw. There is no heroism to it. Oh, completely. Look, my grandpa always told the story of like the day that his bunker got taken to the...

showers, he got pulled to be in the post room. Like a flu had swept through the communist bunker. So there weren't enough people to handle the mail. And him and his uncle got pulled to sort mail. He was like, that does not make me morally better. Right? Like I literally got plucked.

And then we just also know it's not just luck. Like, it's circumstance. Certain things are going to thrive in certain situations, right? And it's just about adaptation. Right. And I feel like in this chapter, we see it with Mundungus, right? Like, he is a perennial thief. He's kind of playing both sides to some extent. Totally. He's playing a different game.

And he seems to survive, right? Like he seems to, it's actually an interesting question. Is he resilient or is he surviving? Right. I kind of think he's resilient because he, like whatever bad thing he does, like both sides maybe kind of need him or there's something wily about him that gets him bouncing back time after time, even though everyone knows that he's untrustworthy. Right. Right.

I mean, we would have to ask him, be like, is your soul being degraded by this? Or like, what is your starting, you know, place on this? Mundungus is really interesting to me. He gets mentioned in this chapter. So does Wormtail. And I think that Wormtail is not resilient. Wormtail is degrading himself. We

We see this picture of him, Sirius, Lupin, and James. And he is smiling and happy and feels lucky to be included. And then we're going to see him later in this book and his own hand is going to turn against him. That is how broken he is going to become. And so I think he is not resilient. He is constantly trying to change in order to survive. But he keeps becoming broken.

a sadder and lesser form of himself. Whereas I don't think we see evidence of that with Mundungus. -He is just like-- - For real. Light on his feet, and he is like thief all the time, all the ways, and he's just gonna take what he needs to take to get going. Yeah, Wormtail-- I mean, Lily describes in her letter

to Sirius, oh, you know, he was here recently and he looked kind of sad. And Harry's like, well, this would have been days before their death, right? So this is maybe even after Wormtail's betrayal of James and Lily. So just that sense of like, he's already committed this kind of Judas act of betraying his friends. Yeah, you see that turn towards destruction. That's really interesting. Yeah. So I just think that there's a line between like,

I don't know, resilience without degradation. It all has to be temporary, whatever it is that you're bouncing back from if you are able to be resilient. This week's episode of Harry Potter and the Sacred Text is brought to you by Blue Lizard. At Blue Lizard, they have simplified sunscreens so that you can be fearless in the sun. Sun exposure is unavoidable and with so much information out there, it can be hard to know the best way to protect your skin. Blue Lizard

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Did you know that foreign investors are quietly funding lawsuits in American courts through a practice called third-party litigation funding? Shadowy overseas funders are paying to sue American companies in our courts, and they don't pay a dime in U.S. taxes if there is an award or settlement. They profit tax-free from our legal system, while U.S. companies are tied up in court and American families pay the price to the tune of $5,000 a year.

But there is a solution. A new proposal before Congress would close this loophole and ensure these foreign investors pay taxes, just like the actual plaintiffs have to.

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Despite all this, we often go about our busy lives removed from it. But the outdoors is closer than we realize. With AllTrails, you can discover trails nearby and explore confidently with offline maps and on-trail navigation. Download the free app today. Maybe one other place to look at in the chapter on that idea of bouncing back is Regulus because he becomes this enthusiastic death eater, right? He wants to join. He joins at like 16, 17. He's already serving the Dark Lord.

And then he changes his mind, right? He sees how Voldemort treats creature. He has this turn and then makes this incredible sacrifice where he goes to the cave to get the Horcrux, not even knowing that it's a Horcrux maybe. Maybe he does. But there's a willingness to...

keep going, right? To keep drinking that liquid in service of what is right. And so there is a sense of, is it resilience? I don't know, but there is a kind of coming to a sense of what he knows is right or coming to a sense of what he has learned is right in opposition to what he has always learned at home and certainly has been prepared for. But I saw that resilience in the willingness to kind of go to his own death. And so in this sense, resilience does end in destruction, but there's a

I don't know. There's a willingness to keep going, a fortitude, even at the cost of his own health because it's in service of this bigger thing that he knows is right. So that struck me as like an interesting place as well. Yeah. The normal for Regulus is the normalcy of the world that he's trying to help the world bounce back toward. His,

his efforts are in the direction of the world's resilience. And I think when you have clarity of purpose, right? Like, I really wanted to get to that bed that night, right? And so you can do things that you didn't think you would be able to do when you have real clarity of purpose. The more I think about this theme of resilience,

In some ways, if you wanted to, you could paint a picture of Voldemort as seeking resilience. The idea of creating Horcruxes is to outrun death. It is to be unkillable in some way. And so each of these items, including the locket, is a symbol and a practical means of being resilient.

But there is such a, I don't know, I guess I'm seeing a dichotomy between a softness and a hardness in resilience. Just like the walls of Sirius's bedroom, there's this desire for permanence is maybe the opposite of what resilience really is about. And there's a sort of organic,

softness ever changing, which incorporates ironically, death and rebirth, right? That the softness, the organic version of resilience is what we see in Regulus, is what we see in Harry at the end of this book, is what we see maybe even in Dumbledore, but a sort of sacrificial sense or a seasonal sense of like, I'm thinking of that great metaphor that, you know,

The idea of changing the world to be better is not a sprint. It's not even a marathon. It's a relay race. And so this sense of like a multi-generational or a constantly changing service of a bigger purpose, like you were saying, like that resilience has to have that sense of seasonality in it. It isn't this kind of plastic permanence that Voldemort represents in some way. Yeah. Yeah.

The metaphor that's coming to mind for me is a branch that bends with the wind, right? Nice. Like nobody congratulates a branch that hasn't withstood wind.

And a branch that refuses to bend at all, right, will just break. And what Voldemort is trying to do is create a world with no breeze, a place with no wind. And what Sirius was trying to do was create a situation for no wind with the posters. And I think that there are times and places for that, right? Where we're like...

No, my love for my children is going to be right. Like there's no bouncing in that. Like that is going to be an oak tree and I'm going to plant that as deep as I can. And I'm going to stand firm on that. But I think much of our lives, we, we need to dangle from the branches rather than have the core trunk. Yeah.

And I think, you know, you introduced me to this definition of evil or that evil is things misordered or just like something in the wrong place. And Voldemort is staking trunks that should be branches. I like that. Or like dirt is just earth out of place, right? Like we can just put these things in the wrong place and they can really become distorted versions of themselves. Yeah.

So Casper, before we wrap up this conversation, I do think we just have to spend another minute on Creature. You know, we talked about clarity of purpose with Regulus, and I think Creature has real clarity of purpose. I also think that what we're seeing in terms of Creature's resilience in this chapter is he's running out of it. Right? Like, he is really on death's door here. And it seems to me like actually Mundungus...

stealing these last items. Yes. It's one degradation too far. And what he's gonna get is just a little bit of love and hope in these next chapters. But what's so beautiful is

how little he's been able to survive on. And, you know, he's like this little flame that Hermione is just going to need to sort of like blow onto a little bit in order for him to reignite. Or even Harry doing this act of kindness of like not letting him hurt himself. Well, that's the thing that really strikes me in this chapter is just the horrific violence that he inflicts and wants to inflict on himself. And it's this very...

Yeah, just complicated relationship that Harry has as the person who has the power to literally summon him and, you know, make him do things, which Harry does. But it includes stopping him from hurting himself because he grabs this poker, you know, he wants to hit his head. And we see at the end of the chapter, I think you're exactly right, this kind of

slight warming, you know, he has this little bow for Ron and Harry and even a little nod towards Hermione, who he starts off by insulting in the worst possible terms at the beginning of their meeting. You know, maybe there's something about love or at least warmth or friendship that makes Kreacher more resilient.

practically also through the giving of this fake locket, you know, it's this massively meaningful symbol to Kreacher of his own worthiness, his own belonging to the Black family, which is the most important part of his identity and has been his purpose in kind of maintaining these objects. So I'm seeing a connection to what we talked about at the beginning of like community being the foundation of resilience. There is some

I want to be measured in what I'm saying, but like some step towards relationship in this chapter between the trio and creature, which is going to be really important for the narrative in the next few chapters. So Casper, this is the last time we're going to be doing Lectio Divina for a little while. And I picked a sentence at random for us. What is it? Creature closed his eyes as though he could not bear to see the reactions to the next word. Oof.

So Casper, step one of Lectio, what is happening in this sentence?

So they've just had the bright idea that their locket might be something that was in the house when they moved into Grimoire Place in book five. And Creature might have stolen it back after they threw it out. And Harry is confronting Creature, who's just, you know, insulted Hermione. And so, you know, he's giving instructions like, don't call her a mudblood. And then he says, you have to tell me the truth. Two years ago, did you steal back this locket? And Creature did steal it back, but...

But, and this is the sentence, it has now been stolen by Mundungus Fletcher. And so he no longer has the locket. And what Harry is asking now is like, okay, well, so where is this locket?

And Kreacher is about to answer and say, "It's gone." Because it's been stolen by Mundungus Fletcher. So he's closing his eyes as though he could not bear to see their reactions to the next word, and the next word is "gone." And that's so interesting because he doesn't want to disappoint them already. Right? Partially because he hates that the locket is gone because it's something that Regulus gave to him. But the context is that Harry, Ron, and Hermione are looking gleeful

And Creature has to give them bad news. And so it's the first time that Creature, Ron, Hermione, and Harry are all on the same team. Oh, interesting. Because I was definitely reading it more like the first half of what you were saying, that it was like he had dishonored the family by like losing it. Yes. But that's true. There is an alignment of interests here. I'm not saying it's like on purpose. Yeah.

Right? Like, Creature's like strange bedfellows. But we actually do all want the same thing here. We're all mad at Mungungus. Okay, step two. What other stories does this remind us of? Creature closed his eyes as though he could not bear to see their reactions to his next word. I'm thinking of like

the musical Into the Woods, where the baker and his wife are, you know, sent out to complete this task of collecting various items in the woods. And there's moments where they each lose an item. The cow was white as milk. And they're kind of, you know, they know why it happened. And it wasn't totally their fault.

And at the same time, it absolutely was their fault. And so the kind of the humiliation of sharing news that you do have to share, but you really don't want to with the person who you're on this shared mission with. Obviously, the relationship here between the tree and creature is different, but just that image of like, "Oh, I have to tell you, but it's so embarrassing. It's so humiliating. You're going to judge me. You're going to think less of me." That I do think is consistent with this scene. I mean, the thing about Chloe

about closing your eyes is that you don't want to see their reaction because really what you want is to not be perceived right you're like please don't see me right like it reminds me of little kids yes don't yet know object permanence and so they're like my eyes i am not here how about you i'm

reminded of this feeling at the end of Persuasion that Anne Elliot, who's marrying beneath her by marrying into the Navy, right? Her father and sister are just not going to be able to bear the idea that she is going to marry beneath her.

And it turns out that they can bear it because, you know, there are all these ways that Captain Wentworth isn't as bad as they thought. He, you know, has 25,000 pounds. He hasn't been aged by the sea as much as you would think. Right. The way that we make unbearable things bearable to ourselves. We're all very good at justifying things, I think.

Right, like these moments of like, oh, I can't bear it. And then suddenly you do just fine. Turns out you can walk another five miles, Vanessa. You just don't want to. So step three, Casper, is what does it remind us of in our own lives? And the sentence again is creature closed his eyes as though he could not bear to see their reactions to his next word. Oh, I've had the...

unhappy experience of having to let people go. Not because of any significant malpractice or anything like that, but either the position that they were in was no longer funded or they just weren't a great match for the role. And even though I liked them individually, like it wasn't a success for them in the employee role that they had.

And that's just, you know, obviously it's so much worse to be let go, but it's not pleasant to be the person to have to share the news. And so that's what I'm thinking of here. And there are like ethics and standards in how you do it, you know? And I feel like...

obviously closing your eyes and looking the other way while you share the news is not best practice. But just that is the kind of feeling that I've had. You know, you want to disassociate as much as possible. If you could write it down and send it to someone over email, you would because you don't want to be there for it. But of course, at the same time, you do want to be there because you care about the person. And so you want to, you know, just be there so that they're not alone. And then later on, you want to help them think through what their next steps might be. But it's, it's...

It's a really, yeah, it's an unhappy experience. I guess that's what I'm reminded of here. How about you? I remember once Casper trying on a bathing suit and I tried it on in front of Kim. And she was like, oh, you look cute. Do you like it? And I was like, oh, I didn't look in the mirror. Like you have to tell me if it fits.

And she was like, well, if you can't look at yourself in the mirror in it, you can't buy it. And I was like, bad logic. I'm never going to have to see myself in this. Do I look okay? And she was like, you look great. I'm not letting you buy it unless you look in the mirror and approve.

still agree with me there are certain things that you don't have to look at but you're my eyes that is so trusting and lovely I think that says a lot about how sweet your friendship is with Kim on both sides and that she was like you're spending your money on this I want you to like it you don't have to do the brave things with your eyes open I was like do I look hot in this and she was like yes you do and I was like cool

I trust you. Now I'm convinced because that's like jumping off a high rock into the ocean or something. Like the fact that I did it is what matters. I don't want to see myself doing it. Here's the thing I just did recently on the persuasion trip that I just got back from. We went on a morning dunk in the English channel. Amazing. Yes. And several pilgrims came with me and Julia. Julia and I love to do this, but like I was really impressed. I think six pilgrims came with us. Wow.

And Julia was like, okay, everybody, should we count to three? And I was like, nope, and just went. Do that. I can't be like, what? As soon as I gather the courage, I have to just do it. And I'm like, I can be brave, but that doesn't mean I have to be brave about the way that I'm brave. I can close my eyes while being brave. You can't ask me to do it twice.

And I think that I led the way and then they all did it because I had already done it. So I went first. You're welcome. Leading with her eyes closed. That's his old dad. Step four, Casper. What does this make you feel called to? Creature closed his eyes as though he could not bear to see the reactions to his next word.

I mean, it makes me next time want to wait and go one, two, three with people and look in the mirror. Because if I can be brave, I can be brave about how I'm being brave. At least sometimes. Not all the time. Sometimes I'm using all my energy doing the brave thing. And that's fine. And sometimes maybe there's a little more. Sometimes I can do it with my eyes open.

It's funny reading it for the fourth time now where it's taking me as like my engagement with the news cycle. I deleted all the news apps on my phone after the election result. I was like, I just, and I feel like maybe it's time to put them back on. I don't want to be addicted to the news cycle and the way that I was for four years during the first Trump presidency. Yeah. But I'm also conscious that I'm like,

Kind of active. I have been actively like avoiding new stories that are just really upsetting. And I think that's okay sometimes. And also sometimes it's just coming from a place of comfort rather than something more serious. And so I'm just, I'm thinking about,

you know, closed his eyes as though he could not bear to see. And like, I could bear to see a little more than I think I've been choosing. And that's, yeah, that's what, that's what this is making me think of. Well, Vanessa, thank you for leading us in that reflection. I love Lectio. I know I say it's my favorite practice, but it really is. It's so good.

Did you know that foreign investors are quietly funding lawsuits in American courts through a practice called third-party litigation funding? Shadowy overseas funders are paying to sue American companies in our courts, and they don't pay a dime in U.S. taxes if there is an award or settlement. They profit tax-free from our legal system, while U.S. companies are tied up in court and American families pay the price to the tune of $5,000 a year. But

But there is a solution. A new proposal before Congress would close this loophole and ensure these foreign investors pay taxes, just like the actual plaintiffs have to.

It's a common sense move that discourages frivolous and abusive lawsuits and redirects resources back into American jobs, innovation and growth. Only President Trump and congressional Republicans can deliver this win for America and hold these foreign investors accountable. Contact your lawmakers today and demand they take a stand to end foreign funded litigation abuse.

Raise the rudders. Raise the sails. Raise the sails. Captain, an unidentified ship is approaching. Over. Roger. Wait, is that an enterprise sales solution? Reach sales professionals, not professional sailors. With LinkedIn ads, you can target the right people by industry, job title, and more. We'll even give you a $100 credit on your next campaign. Get started today at linkedin.com slash results. Terms and conditions apply.

Out here, it's not only the amazing views, but the way time stretches out a little longer and how the breeze hits just right at the summit. With all trails, you can discover nature's best with over 450,000 trails around the world. Download the free app today. Let's hear from Kelsey, who sent us a voice memo this week. Hi, Vanessa, Casper, and Matt. My name is Kelsey, and I've been listening since 2017.

When I first started listening to the podcast, I was in seminary and working on an organic farm. In the years since, I've gotten married, had three beautiful children, finished a PhD, and moved across the country back to my hometown. While I can't credit the podcast with the existence of my children, I do think listening has made me a more patient and thoughtful parent. I have a recent example. My oldest child, who's five, has read the first three Harry Potter books with us.

And he has so many questions. Unlike many children, these questions come right at bedtime when all I usually want is to go downstairs and have a little bit of time to myself.

But listening to the podcast recently, I realized that that time when he wants to ask questions is its own form of Havruta. It's a time for us to engage in dialogue together, for me to understand him better, and for us to use questions often about the Harry Potter books to teach him about the world and what we want him to know about it.

So I just want to thank you for the last several years of this beautiful, reflective time that I found with Harry Potter and the sacred text and the spiritual practices you've introduced me to.

and to offer a blessing to anyone who is a caregiver in this time and who's trying to teach children and young people how to bring these values of love and kindness and justice into the very challenging world we're living in right now. May we continue to be a blessing to one another in that work. Thanks. Kelsey, that's so beautiful. I'm taking credit for those children.

Yes, and we are taking credit for those children. But that is so lovely. Okay, that's going to be a great reframe for when someone is asking me questions that I don't really want to deal with. They are engaging in the sacred practice of Haruta. It is not that they didn't read my email closely.

It's beautiful and so, so glad you've been listening with us for so many years. What a treat. And you're welcome for those three great kids. Casper, it's now time for us to offer blessings for characters in the chapter. Who would you like to bless? It struck me how precious it is to have a physical character

that Harry finds. I mean, he literally reflects, he's like, my mother was a real person. Her hand moved across this page. And so I want to bless Lily and anyone who still writes letters. I've seen Sean pick up a correspondence who is, he literally will say on a Sunday, like, I have to go do my correspondence. Yeah.

But he started writing letters again with an old friend from his high school years who lives in Ohio. And just to see those letters go back and forth is so precious. And of course, we have a hundred technologies which are faster, but to have something so permanent,

speaking of permanence versus resilience, like to have something that will endure in this way. And who knows who finds it, even if it's yourself that finds it years later. I have an old box with like letters and birthday cards and thank you notes. And, you know, it's so lovely to look through those memories of the relationships that you have. And I feel just like,

Like there's something so powerful, especially maybe for someone you love who has died, like to feel that aliveness in the written word in this way. So a blessing for Lily and everyone who's writing a letter that isn't, you know, about bills or about practical things, but is really just testifying to the love that you feel. So blessing for Lily. How about you, Vanessa? Yeah.

I want to bless Creature. I think I just want to bless that little bit of hope still in him that is open to the love that he is about to receive and is going to fill him up. He says some really ugly things in this chapter, and I think it can be really hard to...

pause and appreciate creature for me because he's so hateful to my beautiful Hermione. But his resilience is really incredible. And I just want to take a moment to honor it. Next week, I will be joined by the great Matt Potts as we read book seven, chapter 11, The Bribe through the theme of intimacy.

Just a few reminders before we give our thanks. You can always find ad-free episodes on Apple Podcasts and more about our programming on NotSorryWorks.com. This was a Not Sorry production, a feminist production company, and we are sponsored by the Fetzer Institute.

Our executive producer is Vanessa Zolton. We're edited and produced by AJ Yaramaz. And our music is by Ivan Paisao and Nick Boll. And we are distributed by Acast. Thanks to our fabulous patrons who are part of Minerva's book club. And thanks especially to Kelsey for this week's voicemail.

Thanks also to Ariana Nettleman, who's with us in the studio right now today. Julia Argy, Nikki Zoltan, Courtney Brown, Matt Potts, Anissa Ahmed, Danny Langley, and Stephanie Purcell. We'll be back next week. Bye, everyone. Speed bonnie boy, like a bird on the wing. That was really good.

Did you know that foreign investors are quietly funding lawsuits in American courts through a practice called third-party litigation funding? Shadowy overseas funders are paying to sue American companies in our courts, and they don't pay a dime in U.S. taxes if there is an award or settlement. They profit tax-free from our legal system, while U.S. companies are tied up in court and American families pay the price to the tune of $5,000 a year. But

But there is a solution. A new proposal before Congress would close this loophole and ensure these foreign investors pay taxes, just like the actual plaintiffs have to. It's a common sense move that discourages frivolous and abusive lawsuits and redirects resources back into American jobs, innovation, and growth. Only President Trump and congressional Republicans can deliver this win for America.

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