Watch This Before Getting A Boob Job
01:02:24 Share

Welcome back to another episode of Hot Mess with Alex Earle. I need to be honest with you guys, getting myself to sit down and record has been a little bit of a struggle. The past few days, I've been a little loopy. I ran out of my Lexapro, which is my anxiety medicine, and if anyone's on that type of medicine, you know, like, when you go off of it for a few days, you get, like, super tired, super brain foggy,

I couldn't think straight. I was like in and out of like really bad moods. I was feeling sad. I was like, what's wrong with me? And then I realized I was out of my prescription and I need to get it filled. So luckily I got some more pills. We're good. We're back. But I was having a little bit of an episode there, but that's okay. Just another week. So

This episode is presented by Sephora. Nourish yourself with hair care that really works whatever your hair type from brands like Amika, Kerastase, Moroccan Oil, and K18. Click or tap the banner or visit sephora.com to shop now.

This episode is brought to you by Tinder. We all have a dream of how we'll meet that special someone, right? We think it's going to be this big romantic moment. I'm going to be walking down the side of the road. He's going to see me, think I'm the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, turn right back around, come sweep me off my feet. But that's never a

quite how it happens. I mean, I met my boyfriend at the bar, at a party, you know? I mean, I feel like that's how it happens when you go out. Some of you are still waiting for a meet cute moment to happen, but in reality, you might be more likely to find your meet cute on Tinder. A new relationship starts

every three seconds on the app and the time it takes you to get a drink. You could have already met your special someone. So don't overthink it. Open Tinder and take a chance on romance. No matter how your journey starts, you may join the millions of relationships that started thanks to Tinder. Explore all of the possibilities for yourself. Tinder, it starts with a swipe. Download Tinder today.

This episode is brought to you by Liquid IV. It is hot out this summer. It is actually absurdly hot out and you don't have to be an athlete like Braxton to get the sweat going working outside training. I'm sweating walking to the car, walking down the road. People are taking zoom meetings on their porch sweating and you need to replace that sweat with hydration. I personally love Liquid IV. They have three times the electrolytes of the leading sports drink plus eight vitamins and nutrients for everyday wellness. Liquid IV hydrates two times faster than water alone.

If any of you were listening to one of the episodes where I said I had a panic attack this summer, it's because my body was so dehydrated. It was run down, didn't feel good. The boat captain actually had to bring me out a liquid IV to put in my water because I was feeling so nauseous. That just truly shows my love for liquid IV and how much they do. They're so amazing. They have a bunch of flavors to choose from and, you know, take it to the beach with you. Make sure you're staying hydrated this summer. So grab your liquid IV.

Hydration multiplier sugar-free in bulk nationwide at Costco, or you can get 20% off when you go to liquidiv.com and use code HOTMESS at checkout. That's 20% off anything you order when you shop better hydration today using promo code HOTMESS at liquidiv.com.

How are you guys? I think we need to do some life updates. It is now nearing the end of January, and that means that we are nearing the end of my 30 hard. Thank God. You guys don't know. I'm ready for this to be over. I'm very happy that I did it for myself, but...

I think for me, like I've had almost too much peace and quiet this month, which is great because I never get peace and quiet and I feel like I never get time with myself or to just like be alone in my own thoughts. But it's really been stressing me out. I think I realized that I do better in a go-go-go environment and I do better. I've always been like a procrastinator. So I'm way

much better at getting things done, like when I'm in a rush or when I feel like there's a little bit of fire under my ass. There's just been so much downtime this month, which has been great. And I've been able to work on myself a lot, but I am kind of missing...

the going out every other night, getting on a plane every other day, running around, and I miss my crazy schedule. But luckily, in a week, we will be right back into it. And I've been trying to work on a lot of fun things for Hot Mess, and I want to take you guys with me as much as possible. I had a few meetings this week with my team that I work with on Hot Mess, and I was trying to say, like, what can we do to kind of

give you guys a little bit more of an experience because, you know, I'm talking to you a lot. I'm telling you stories. Sometimes I share like photos and videos as overlay, but I really want to try and work on a vlog style aspect to hot mess. So let me know. You guys might be like, Alex, no one wants that. Shut up.

You may be like, Alex, we don't want to hear you speak. We don't want to hear anything from you. But I am thinking of incorporating almost a YouTube vlog feel into hot mess episodes just because I think that it's a little bit easier sometimes for me to like show my personality or you guys see when I have my friends on like it's a little bit easier for me to be myself in that way. And I think it will be very enjoyable for me as well as you guys, um,

For example, my birthday episode, we vlogged a little bit of it and I had so much fun doing that. So that may be coming up soon, might be not, but you guys let me know, DM me, tell me your thoughts. It'll probably be easier if you DM the Hot Mess account on Instagram. It's just at Hot Mess. That way I can see it. Sometimes on my Alex Earl account, they get a little lost. But with that being said, don't forget to subscribe to this podcast.

Follow us on socials, follow us on Spotify, YouTube, wherever you're listening to this. Share it with your friends so we can keep the hot mess going. And something I did this week which spawned kind of this podcast episode idea was I went to go get my lips done. I went to get a little Botox. I went to get a touch up on my lips. I...

I have always been open about that on social media, which I know some people are not, especially a lot of like celebrities and stuff. They keep it like quiet under the wraps. They're telling nobody. They're like, I haven't gotten any work done ever. And for me, I've always been just open and honest about it. Never really thought twice about sharing it on social media, even before I had a

a bigger following. I don't know, I've just always liked to take my followers along that process and journey with me and share it with you guys. I know this one might be a big shock to you guys. This is a secret I've been keeping in for a while now, but I figured I would just tell you guys and be open and honest with you. Oh my god, this is really hard for me right now, but my boobs are fake. I got a boob job, I know.

Shocker. We did not know that one. A lot of you guys, one, have questions about it. Two, have questions about why I share it on social media, especially a lot of the times I do interviews, they ask me about how I decided to be open about this on social media and what are the repercussions of that. You're honest about what you've done. You said, I got breast implants. I would never go on the internet and lie or not say something. If someone says, oh, you got that done, like, yes, I did. Because...

You grow up and I've grown up watching people on social media and they're like, oh, this is just how I was born. This is how I look. And I'm like, well, shit, like, I don't look like that. And it's just not real. And that's like, what are you really going to lie about that? Like, oh, yeah, they just grew overnight. No. Right.

I'm gonna keep it around. I don't want this to come off in a way at all like I'm promoting you to do any type of cosmetic surgery. I, in fact, think that you definitely have to be in a good mental place before you're gonna do these things. And I don't think it's gonna help you in terms of confidence or anything like that. But we will get into that this episode. But I kind of wanted to take you guys along

journey with me, when I got a boob job, how I decided to get a boob job, how long I wanted one for, what going into surgery is like, what the downsides of it are, how I have dealt with sharing it on social media, what are the bad things about sharing it on social media, kind of all thoughts about boob job, lip

filler, anything I've gotten done before. And I know for me at least, I was scouring the internet before I got my boob job. You guys have no idea. I watched maybe 50 YouTube vlogs of girls getting surgery, what it was like after, what it was like before, talking about their experience, and it was really helpful for me. And I think there's

a lot of information that sometimes you don't even get from doctors, you don't even know. So I think that this will hopefully be helpful for anyone who is maybe thinking about getting some type of surgery. Let's take a trip down memory lane back to high school, middle school, I think more high school. Alex...

pre-boob job, I have always, always admired boobs. I don't know, I don't want that to sound creepy or anything, but like I have just always looked at boobs as like, wow, like so womanly and beautiful and I myself, I was going through puberty, I was like, all right, when are they gonna blossom? When are they coming?

and they never really did. I didn't have like super, super flat chest, but I had like maybe a little like A cup, and I just wanted big boobs. Don't know why. Love small boobs, love big boobs, but for me, I just had always looked at them as like, wow. I don't know. I've always idolized them. Always wanted big boobs. So, throughout high school, I

They never came in. I saw that there were these gummy bears that you could take to make your boobs grow. I have no idea. You know how there was like the sugar bear hair, like everyone would take those to grow their hair. And there was like the influencers or YouTubers at the time were promoting that. There was a kind, I don't know if it was the same brand, but something like that for growing your boobs.

I literally would take them all the time. I also would look up on YouTube like supplements to make your boob grow and I would watch like these girls on YouTube and it would be their like monthly process with these like boob growth pills and for some reason I was influenced and I would buy them and I would literally wait for my boobs to grow and they never did. Another thing that I did that I saw online was DracoLynx.

certain types of milk could make your boobs grow. So I would ask my mom to get certain types of milk at the grocery store and I would try and drink it all the time. Again, that didn't really do anything for me. And...

I don't know. I just think it's so funny how stressed I was about this in high school and I was trying all these different remedies. So I feel like I always knew, like it wasn't just one day spawned on me that I was like, oh my God, like I really want to get a boob job. I kind of knew from a young age that I, I don't know, I always wanted...

boobs. I don't know why this is like kind of getting awkward for me to talk about right now. I'm like, does this sound weird and creepy that I'm like talking about idolizing boobs so much? Anyhow, I get to college and now I'm feeling a little bit older. You know, I'm over 18. I'm like, I can get a surgery on my own if I wanted to, but I definitely didn't have the money for a

to no extent for boobs. My poor dad, I feel so bad for him. He probably was like, can you please stop doing this? So awkward. But we would be at Thanksgiving dinner actually sitting around the table. And I was like, dad, you know, for Christmas, like, what if I got a boob job? Like, what if I just got boobs? And he's like, Alex, I'm not paying for your boobs. Like, that is the weirdest concept ever to me. And you know what? I kind of agree.

I understand where he's coming from. He's like, hey, I'm not going to go give you this lump sum of money for you to go get plastic balls in your chest. So, I mean, can't really judge him there, but I really tried. I really, really tried for a while.

I would try my mom. She was like, you're perfect. You don't need to change anything. That's another thing is a lot of my friends and everyone around me at the time would say, Alex, like there's nothing wrong with your boobs. You don't need to change them. And I'm aware that I was perfectly fine before. And

We will get into this later in the episode, but doing it out of a lack of confidence within yourself isn't the right way to go about it. I was confident in myself. I was fine. I just...

wanted them. Like, I loved boobs, like I said a million times. I'll keep repeating this throughout the episode, but I just wanted them kind of for myself. It wasn't because I thought, oh my gosh, now I'm gonna get all these guys or now I'm gonna feel happier about myself. Like, I just wanted them to want them. This was something that I was just dead set on for years. Like, probably...

six years, I would say. In my mind, I was like, at some point, I will be getting a boob job, and no one can change my mind about it. And it was right before my junior year of college, right before my 21st birthday, I had decided that I was just gonna go see doctors on my own. I didn't have the money for a boob job, or at least not

all the money for a boob job yet. But I was like, you know what? I'm just going to get the process started. Let's start seeing some doctors. Let's see what they have to say. And I definitely recommend if you are going to get any type of procedure done,

seen multiple doctors before you do anything because they're all going to tell you something different. They're all going to give you a different opinion. And I think it's super, super, super important to go to someone that you feel comfortable with because you want to be able to say like, I like this. I don't like that. I want to do this. I don't want to do that. So one of the first doctors that I went to was in Miami because I was at University of Miami at the time. So I could just Uber on over to the doctor's office and

Something that I really wanted to do with a boob job was go through my armpit, which we will get into when we talk about the surgery in a little bit. But I really, really wanted to go through my armpit because I didn't want to have any scarring on my actual bosoms. So this doctor was telling me that he doesn't do that. He does not do through the armpit anymore. And that's like an older practice. He was also kind of giving me scary vibes. And I think a lot of the doctors...

in Miami or I don't know. I don't want to put a stereotype on doctors in Miami, but I think doctors that are very well known sometimes can come off a little cocky maybe and like they aren't as nice, I've found. For example, I was talking to this doctor and I felt scared to even say my last name. I was like, okay, like I don't know what I'm saying right now. I'm so sorry. Like let me just run out of here real quick. So

Saw a few different doctors. The one that I ended up going with was the one that my mom went to, and he is in New York City. So I'm from Jersey, he's in New York, and of course, the one that I liked the most, he was the most expensive. And...

I had told my dad that I went to all these doctors. I was telling him all this. He's like, Alex, I don't want to hear it. I'm not giving you any money for a boob job. Like, get out of here. I'm not paying for it. If you want to do something, you do it for yourself. But he was basically like, I'm closing my ears. Please stop telling me all of this. My mom also didn't want me to do it. But then as I saw the price that this doctor in New York was telling me, I was like, oh,

you know what? Maybe the doctor who was a little bit nasty to me, maybe he would be better. Maybe he would be better. But I, you know, took some time to myself and I was like, if I'm going to be making a change to my body, um,

a permanent change. Like, once you kind of do something like this, you never really go back in a sense. You can get them taken out, but you're gonna have scars. Like, yeah, I don't know. It's a little bit different than if you get your lips done. Like, those are going away in six months to a year. They'll be gone. You won't know you ever did anything, but this is a little bit different. This is surgery. So, I...

Decided that I think it's sometimes better to splurge a little bit more if you are going to make a change to your body. You want to trust the doctor. You want the results to be good. So I decided to end up going with this doctor in New York. Now, I had the consultation with him and, you know, they kind of go over like, oh, what size do you want? What do you want them to look like? Because there's all this different...

that goes into a boob job, basically. There's silicone ones, which are plastic, and then there's saline ones, which are plastic, but they're filled with salt water, basically.

Don't quote me on that, but more salt water than like plasticky jelly in the middle. There's different downsides and upsides to both. So they give you a packet. They're telling you, you know, you can do over the muscle, under the muscle. You can do all these different types of incisions. You can go under the areola, under the bosom, in the armpit. So there's a lot of different options and I think it definitely just depends. Personal preference matters.

Do what's best for you. But I'm going over all these things with the doctor. This is the summer before my junior year of college. And my mom came with me to this appointment because she's like, okay, well, if you're going, I'm not going to let you go alone. And I was so excited, so dead set on doing this after this appointment. But I didn't really have the money for this. I...

had a few jobs at the time, but none of them were really gonna amount to me just having like thousands of dollars to spend on some boobs. So I decided, you know what? Where can I dip into for this? My parents started this little bank account for me when I was younger. They had all of my communion money in there, all my money from my baptism, anything like

birthday cards from my grandparents, holiday cards, like every check, anything I ever got in my life basically was in this one bank account. And the purpose of this bank account was to give access to us when we were older and out of college and we're supposed to be financially responsible. And I decided, you know what?

I'm gonna dip into that for my boob job. So, my communion money had gone towards boobs instead of maybe like a down payment for a house, but that's okay. It is what it is. So, now that I was older, I was able to have access to this bank account and...

I used the money for the surgery. I told my parents I was doing it. My mom was like, Alex, I'm still not really sure about this, but if you want to do it, of course, I'll be there, take you to surgery, pick you up, whatever. My dad was like, Alex, I don't even want to hear about it. He's like, please, just don't tell me anything about this. Just go. And now the scary part, surgery. Now it is Christmas break from my junior year of college.

I have a few weeks off of school. So I was like, this is the time I'm going to schedule the appointment. I'm going to do it. It's happening. And to prepare for the surgery, it's kind of crazy because I had always thought that there was like a lot that went into this or you're going to have 15 meetings with your doctor, but they do this all the time. So it's basically just like you come in the morning of you're going through like exactly what you want and then you go into surgery and

For me that really stressed me out. I was like, oh my god, like can we at least talk through this like can I facetime you? Mr. Doctor, can we talk through this like i'm nervous and I remember being so Excited the week before but so scared the night before I was going in for surgery. I could not sleep. It felt like

I was a little kid again and I was waiting for Santa Claus to come down the chimney. I was anxiously awaiting this day for so long. And then, of course,

Right before I wanted to do it, I was like, I don't want to do it. You know what? I'm so happy. I actually don't want to do it. I lied. I started to Google things like Google what the surgery looked like. I freaked myself out. I was like, I really don't want to do it, but I knew I did want to do it. So I don't know. I was in a weird headspace and I feel like that definitely has to be normal for anyone who decides to do any type of surgery. I mean, I think that way before I get my hair done every time I want to go get my hair highlighted.

somehow when I'm going to sit down in that chair in the salon, I'm like, wait, what if I dyed my hair black? Like that would just be really great. So I'm just a very indecisive person as it is, but I knew I wanted to do this for a while and

I knew I wanted to do it and I wake up a cold morning in December. I get in the car with my mom at probably 4:00 AM. We pack my surgery bag. You basically have to wear like a zip down so that it's easy to get on and off because after you're going to be a little immobile, you can't really move your arms.

and we head to the Big Apple, New York City. Big Al's on her way to get some big old titties, and I was ready. So, if I can remember correctly, before you get the surgery, they give you some prescriptions that you take a few days before, like the week leading up. Just, I don't, I don't know exactly. There's some pills you got to take the morning of, and...

We pull up to the doctor's office. I get there and we're going over sizing one more time. I was printing out pictures, literally of boobs that I found on the internet. And I'm like, this is what I want it to look like. Thank you so much. I'm like, feel like such a creeper right now. I have printed out boobs that I'm bringing into this office and showing the doctor. They gave you a big bra and this is at least how my doctor did it, but he gave me a big bra and

So imagine I have like A cup boobs and he gives me this like double D bra. And basically we're putting in different implant sizes to see like how far I want it to come out, what I want it to look like. And basically I decided that

I didn't want to do too big. I was like, I don't want them to be like Dolly Parton size, like big old knockers. Like I would just like to have some cleavage, something to fit in a bra. Oh my God, that reminds me.

in middle school i know i cannot be the only one that did this but i used to shove my bra my little bra from justice blue bra it had like lace hearts on it i would shove socks in there literally before going to school under my like uniform because i wanted it to look like i had like a little something poking out of there or i would go to take pictures and i would like actually shove so many socks in my bra to try and make it look like i had some cleavage like i

I was trying everything I could to get some cleavage in these Instagram photos. I was 12 years old and I was shoving socks in my bra. I really hope that I'm not the only one that did that and I'm not embarrassing myself right now. But a big factor for me when picking out what exactly I was going to go for was kind of following what my mom had did because my mom and I are very similar. Like,

We're allergic to the same things. We have the same body type. And she had her boobs for 14, 15 years from the same doctor. And I was like, you know what? I'm kind of going to trust my mom's opinion on this, what she has to say. And she did the incision that goes through her armpit and she had no scarring. Like you can't see it at all. So for me, I was like, I really want to go through my armpit.

And when I told you guys there's two different types of implants, there's the silicone ones, which are the all like plastic jelly inside. And those are the most popular ones. Like those are the ones that I would say like probably majority of people getting a boob job get. They're definitely more popular.

I decided to go with the saline ones and there's different types of upkeep to both. The ones that are silicone, I think you have to go in like X amount of years and like go get them checked. But the saline ones are kind of fine because if they were to like

pop or explode or anything. They're just salt water on the inside, so it's not as, like, poisonous to your body if something were to happen. But the downside to saline ones are you can get, like, rippling, which I've seen before in my boobs at times. Like, if you bend over in a certain way, like, they're more...

I don't know, malleable? Like they kind of crunch up because it's just water in there as opposed to like something that's a little bit more like solid jelly plastic. But what I wanted to do was go through my armpit and the reason you have to do the saline one in your armpit is they will put the plastic bag in there through your armpit without any of the water in and then once it's in your chest, they pump up the water and fill it up.

really gross. I hate saying this and I hate thinking about it too much. So we're just gonna keep moving on. But I did saline. I did 275 cc. CCs is like the sizing in boob implants. And I did under the muscle because that's how they look a little bit more natural. That's what the doctor said he always does. And I did saline. I did saline. I did saline. I did saline.

And I didn't want mine to be too high set. So besides the actual sizing of the implant, so 275 is like on the lower end of sizing that they do for implants. Like people will get...

350, 400. Those are like the way bigger ones, but there's also profiles that you do. So that's how they look kind of from the side. So the CCs are more the overall circle sizing. And then the profile is how it kind of fills up and there's high profile, moderate profile. Is there a low profile?

I'm not really sure. There's ones that are called like a teardrop, so they like really swoop down. So if you're looking at the boobs from the side, the high profile is gonna look like super full circle, like high and up there. Moderate profile is kind of gonna like, you know, look a little bit more natural, more like bigger at the bottom than big at the top. And that's the one that I wanted to do because I didn't want them to look too bam, here I am with these big old plastic boobs, like knocking everyone over.

And we'll get into how I felt about this afterwards. But that's what I went for with the surgery. Basically, no one prepares you for how scary surgery day is and how scary it is just walking into this room where they're basically going to slice and dice you. I was not prepared. No one had told me about this part.

Why do I feel like it was so nonchalant? But I guess it's just normal for these doctors and stuff. I mean, they do this like all day, every day. But for me, my mom left. I'm in my little robe and they basically wheel me in in a wheelchair to the surgery room. I think the last place I ever want to go in my life again is the surgery room because

This was the part that just I was not prepared for. Who was going to tell me that you are basically like a piece of meat being wheeled into this room? The lights in there were so bright. It was all white, almost kind of like my room now that I have no furniture or colors or art. We are trying to fix that this week, but...

It was bright blinding lights in there. Cold as can be. Like I was, oh my God, you're going basically into a big empty refrigerator. And all I see is the surgery chair, which they placed me down on. And I see to the right of me a little metal tray. And there's like scissors, little scaffold knives on there. I don't know what they're doing. And I was like,

Um, so they're just gonna cut me open. I just, no. It was so scary, guys. Like, I'm not gonna bullshit with you right now. Like, I, at that moment, was ready to get up, take my clothes, and run. Run all the way back to New Jersey. So I'm sitting in the surgery chair in this bright white suit.

freezing cold room. I'm looking over at these tools that are about to cut me open and I started crying. I started crying. I remember thinking, oh my god, like what if, what if I die? And I'm so sorry to get very dark right now, but I was freaking out. Freaking out.

This episode is brought to you by Tinder. We all have a dream of how we'll meet that special someone, right? We think it's going to be this big romantic moment. I'm going to be walking down the side of the road. He's going to see me, think I'm the most beautiful girl he's ever seen, turn right back around, come sweep me off my feet. But that's never a

quite how it happens. I mean, I met my boyfriend at the bar at a party, you know? I mean, I feel like that's how it happens when you go out. Some of you are still waiting for a meet cute moment to happen, but in reality, you might be more likely to find your meet cute on Tinder. A new relationship starts

every three seconds on the app and the time it takes you to get a drink you could have already met your special someone so don't overthink it open tinder and take a chance on romance no matter how your journey starts you may join the millions of relationships that started thanks to tinder explore all of the possibilities for yourself tinder it starts with the swipe download tinder today this episode is brought to you by majuri you know i had a thought the other day since rwanda jewelry becomes something we only bought on special occasions

Mejuri approaches fine jewelry a little bit differently. Each one of their pieces is handcrafted by jewelers committed to quality craftsmanship as well as ethical and sustainable jewelry production. Created by women for women, Mejuri is breaking down barriers in what has long been an exclusive and occasional category of men buying for women.

In 2020, the brand launched the Missouri Empowerment Fund in support of higher education for underrepresented women and non-binary individuals. Because fine jewelry doesn't have to cost the world. Feel good about your jewelry in more ways than one. Start stacking your favorites, shop online or visit the website to find a store near you.

The only other person that was in this room with me was the anesthesiologist. And he's basically asking my weight, my height, all the questions that they ask for getting your right dosing for the anesthesia. Anesthesia. I don't... I can't say that word today. Anyhow, I turned to him and I was like, can you give it to me now? And he's like, well, they're going to start in like a few minutes. We can wait. And I was like...

Please put it in my arm right now and knock me out because sitting in that room, I was so terrified. I remember just...

very dark thoughts were going through my mind because it's scary. Like you were going under the knife. You're gonna be put out for a little bit and there's a lot of complications that can go wrong in surgery. And I just, every single thought of that was racing through my mind and it didn't really hit me ever how scary surgery was until I was in that moment. So if you're thinking about getting surgery of any type,

in terms of plastic surgery, take this into account. Do your research before because I was terrified. So the anesthesiologist comes over, he puts a needle in my arm, counts down from 10, lights out. The next thing I remember was waking up and it felt like there was an 18-wheeler truck sitting on my chest. I am laid back in this chair, right?

All of a sudden, I'm like kind of like coming to life. My eyes are opening. I'm like, hello, world. Where am I? And then I just remembered like, oh shit, I just got a boob job. My chest was so tight. Like everyone asks how the pain was afterwards.

I wouldn't say it is painful for sure, but it's like a different type of pain because it's so tight and heavy on your chest. I look down because I'm in this little robe and I literally glare down. I'm like, oh my God, she's got titties now. I immediately start crying. I'm like, oh my God.

What did I do? I should have gone bigger. That's why I started crying. I thought that I did not go big enough. And I was like, damn it. I just went through all of that. And now I just still don't have the right size boobs that I want. And the nurses had to help me down. You can't raise your arms for about...

two weeks, especially for me because I got it in my armpits. But the nurse is helping me down. She puts me in a wheelchair. I was feeling a little wooze and I had to pee. So they gave me an apple juice and my mom was there at the time she was picking me up. She helped me go to the bathroom. It was so weird because I felt so sore. Like I was like, holy shit, I just did like a Pilates class or something. Like I can't move right now. And I

I was squatting on the toilet. I'm looking at my mom like, get me in the car right now because I need to tell her that I actually messed up and I should have gone 10 times bigger. Mind you, I'm on lots of drugs right now. I'm very loopy. She puts me in the car. My little sister's in the back and we have like an hour and a half ride home from New York City to New Jersey. And I'm sitting in the car.

I look over at my mom. Mom, I didn't get big enough boobs. Oh my God. Like, what did I do? I wish they were bigger. They're so small. And then I was like, ow, like this hurts so bad. So she gave me the pain medicine.

knocked out like a light. I slept the whole ride home. I wake up, we're at our house in Jersey and I got there and literally went right back to bed. So you're basically bedridden for like a week. It's not that bad. I will say recovery for me was not as bad as I've heard it is for some people. And that just depends on your pain tolerance, your surgery. Like it just, it all depends. As my loopiness squared off a little bit, I...

you know, would try to kind of sneak peek in the mirror in the bathroom because you're all taped up from surgery. Like I had this compression thing on my boobs and I really wanted to see them because I don't know. I've been waiting my whole life. I just, I wanted to see the boobs. So I'd kind of like try and take sneak peeks in the bathroom mirror and, um,

Then I was content with my boobs. I was like, you know what? Actually, I did the right size. I don't know why I was freaking out before. A little post-surgery traumatic cry, but I actually can't even imagine if I did bigger because I would have looked crazy. So I'm very happy with the size that I went with. Recovery, basically, I was sleeping most of the days. And let me tell you something about sleeping after you get a boob job.

you have to sleep on your back. And for the first week, I slept on my back and basically sitting up on a mountain of pillows.

I am someone who sleeps face down, buries my face in the pillows. Like I basically suffocate myself when I sleep. So I was not prepared to be sleeping on my back and I had to sleep on my back for three months, I think. And it was definitely a process. At first, it was very hard for me to fall asleep once I stopped taking the pain medicine. I know instead of a lot of the pain medicine that they gave me, which is like the super strong...

I have no idea what they are, but I,

I took a lot of Tylenol extra strength just because I get weird about drugs. I don't know my whole life. Like I was scared to take an Advil probably until the end of high school. Like for some reason, I'm always on the wave of like, you know what? I can get better myself. I can do it. Like even when I was sick, I was like, I don't want to take medicine. I'm fine. So we took a lot of Tylenol extra strength and that really helped me a lot when I was feeling pain, sore. That was a lot of it is you feel really sore. It's just...

I mean, you shoved plastic balls into your body and your skin was like stretched out. So you're just sore. And because I had gone in my armpits, I was very bruised and swollen on my ribs and down my stomach. So it was very like puffed out and bruised for...

maybe two weeks I had bruises on my sides of my ribs and that was definitely weird to see and like tripped me out a little bit but it wasn't that bad you definitely can't shower or do anything for yourself I had to have my

My mom washed my hair. I had a boyfriend at the time who came over after I got surgery, and I literally had to sit in the bath, and he would, like, wash my hair, because you can't lift your arms up. You can't do much. But the time that I was in recovery, I'm pretty sure season two of Euphoria came out, and that's basically what got me through recovery, was watching Euphoria. So now, probably a week or two off, you go back in, you check up with the doctor, and...

I was feeling good to go. I was like, okay, here we go. We did the boob thing. We're good. We are ready to go. The thing about getting a boob job, I mean, I think a lot of plastic surgery, like I would assume like a nose job takes a while to heal, but

Your boobs sit way higher up in the beginning and then they drop. So I kept reading online about this. Everyone's like, you have to wait for the boob implants to drop and fluff. So basically that means that your body's getting used to this foreign substance in your body and it's eventually gonna, you know, like chill out a little bit. It's gonna like mesh in there. But at first your skin is like...

Excuse me, what did you just shove in here? I can't move. And then it like drops, it settles down, it's flowing around. And that's why when people first get their boob jobs, you can kind of tell because it looks like their boobs are up at their collarbones. Like my boobs were so high that they were knocking me in the face. And then after a little bit, they drop, they settle, and you're good to go there. So when I did this, I went back to school the next month

And a lot of people were like, wait, are you going to tell everyone that you got a boob job? Like, what are you going to do about that? Like, you don't want to tell the guys, do you? Like, what are you going to do? Like, you can't have people find out. I was like, guys, let's be so for real right now. I, you know, all praise to people who want to keep their plastic surgery a secret. That is completely fine. That's your choice. But listen, no, that I did not just come back from winter break going from,

an A cup to a D cup. That did not just happen overnight.

I wouldn't believe it. I don't expect anyone else to believe it. To me, it was a no-brainer. It's like, well, what do you mean? Am I not going to tell people? How am I even going to try and lie about that? I just feel like it was so outwardly obvious that I got a boob job, and that's fine with me. I had no shame in it. I was happy as a clam. I was like, finally, the day has come. Here she is. I had my boobs. I didn't have to shove my bras with socks anymore. It was

so happy, so happy. So I really didn't care telling people. And I think on TikTok at this time, I had like 150,000 followers, which is a good amount. And I right away was just open and honest about it on there because I

People are gonna talk, people are gonna say stuff. If I just went on my days saying, "Oh no, I didn't get a boob job, like, I don't know how these lumps formed on my chest," I just think it would have ultimately even led to more shit talking. Like, yeah, I did it, get over it. I was so happy, almost too happy, after I got this surgery. The first week that I had gone out after this, probably four weeks post-surgery,

It was my friend's birthday. She got a table at a club. I was so excited that I had these new boobs. I took my top off in the club and I was dancing around with my friends. I mean, it wasn't like I had it off for that long. It was probably like 10 seconds, but I was like with my girlfriends. I was like flashing them. I remember we had like a big reveal in my apartment. I was like, here they are. Voila, the moment I've been waiting for.

And I mean, there's nothing better than fresh off the table. Like I felt great. I was like, woo, I am so happy. And now this leads me to what I wanted to talk about afterwards. Does getting plastic surgery make you more confident? If you are someone who struggles with confidence in yourself in general and you say, you know what? I'm going to get a nose job. It's going to make me feel better.

Well, then I think after you get a nose job, you're going to say, okay, well, what's the next thing? Like your looks should not correlate to your overall confidence. There is a difference there. Confidence comes from within and your mental state with yourself. Okay. Appearance and wanting to appear a certain way or change an appearance. If you want to get your hair highlighted and that makes you feel better, that can make you feel better. That's not going to change everything.

your confidence in yourself. If you are someone who struggles with self-confidence and you bleach your hair, you may feel good for a second. You may say, wow, I feel so much better today. My hair, my highlights, so much better. But then you're going to kind of shrivel back up into that mental space where you're just not confident in yourself. And I want to stress that with cosmetic plastic surgery. If someone was to ask me, you know, I don't feel good about myself.

i don't like my boobs so i think i really want to change them i think that will make me feel better i'd be honest i'd say you know what like i don't think that will make you feel it may make you feel better temporarily but then if you have low self-confidence and you do your boobs

You're going to be insecure about the next thing or the next thing. And confidence should have nothing to do with looks. Confidence is a state of mind. And I want to talk about confidence in its own episode because I feel like it's such a prevalent topic that comes up in all these episodes that I'm talking about when it comes to guys, when it comes to acne, when it comes to plastic surgery. Looks...

are something that can temporarily make you feel confident. But that is not going to change your actual state of mind and confidence with yourself. That comes from within. That comes from doing work on yourself. And when I say work on yourself, that doesn't mean surgery. So I just wanted to be really clear on that and I didn't want to send out the wrong message because although I'm very happy with my decision with the surgery that I did, some people may get it and may not be happy. And I don't want to influence anyone to...

get a surgery. I think that has to come from yourself and what you want with yourself. And that is something that I get asked a lot because I post about getting a boob job on social media. I post about getting my lips done. I post about getting Botox. And I'll get a lot of comments saying, well, what about all the young girls that are looking up to you? And that breaks my heart because I don't want

young girls to look at themselves and say, oh, you know, I have to do this to look better or feel happier. But where I'm coming from with this is when I was younger, okay, I would go on social media, whatever platform it was, and I'm looking at these girls, Instagram models, and I was like, wait, how? I don't look like that. And a lot of the times, a lot of these people had work done. And I would be so insecure about

about myself that I didn't appear the way that this hot Instagram model looked and I'm 12 years old sitting in my bedroom and probably had work done editing their photos. I don't know you're 12 years old. It's also not realistic to look like that. You have a lot of growing up to do. So I think that although I agree, I don't think that

shoving plastic surgery in young girls' faces is good. I just personally couldn't lie about it because I don't want girls to be upset who are younger and say, oh, you know, like, I don't have boobs. Like, what happened to me? Like, I just, I didn't either, you know? Like, I paid for them to get them done. So, I tried to do a balance with, you know, what I post or say about it. Of course, I'm going to

tell the truth if someone asks me. Yes, I got surgery. Yes, I get my lips done. But I don't make it the main purpose of my content, if that makes any sense. Like, I'm not trying to be out here promoting it all the time. But I do think there has to be a level of transparency, at least on my platform. And I understand why people do not share that they have gotten any work done.

online because it's a lot and you're opening up yourself to a lot more criticism. I mean, think about all these celebrities, right, who deny having any work done sometimes almost when they obviously have had work done.

They don't want to hear it. They don't want to hear what you have to say. And honestly, good for them. They don't need to share it. They don't owe anyone an explanation. If you get something done for yourself and you don't want to talk about it, you don't have to talk about it. That's fine. I chose to talk about it. Does not mean you have to talk about it and does not mean that anyone else you see online

owes you them talking about it. I chose to share this story online just because a lot of people don't, and I think there's a lot of things that go into surgeries like this that a lot of people don't know about, and I hope this can be informative for anyone, and I also want to stress that getting surgery to change your looks or appearance is only a temporary thing.

little boost of confidence. Confidence comes from within, does not have to do with looks. And that is my spiel on that. Woo! I can feel the trolls coming to comment their mean little trolly things already. And let's end this episode with my favorite segment.

What would Alex do? What would she do? Maybe it's not the best advice, but just going to tell you what I would do. So let's get out of my bed. It's actually clean today because my mom's staying with me right now. So that's why it's not looking so hot mess over here today. My mom has come in here. She is taking a jackhammer to my room and she's like, you know what? We're whipping this place into shape. I'm going to do it.

I have new furniture coming. I got a little couch, like a little loveseat in the corner of my room. Well, it's not here yet, but it will be in the corner of my room. And it is the hot mess color. At least I hope it's similar to the hot mess color, that like wine, red burgundy-ish color. And I feel like that could be a fun place to podcast for hot mess. We're going to have a little hot mess corner over there. Not yet, but we will have it.

maybe not next week, maybe the week after that. All right, but let's get into what would Alex do. This episode is brought to you by Joiba Bubble Tea. If you're a fan of bubble tea, then you guys have to try this range from Joiba. I've seen this all over my TikTok and personally, my little siblings are obsessed with this Joiba Bubble Tea. They show me videos all the time. So Joiba Bubble Tea, it comes in several delicious flavors.

fruity flavor tea combinations and popping boba. Joyba has fun flavors like strawberry lemonade, green tea, and mango passion fruit green tea. Enjoy your popping boba moment anytime, anywhere with Joyba bubble tea. Follow Joyba on Instagram and TikTok at joyba.fun for fun giveaways and to find a retailer near you. This episode is brought to you by Joyba bubble tea. If you thought bubble tea was just a trend, think again. In fact...

Now you can have it in the comfort of your own home. I have seen it all over my TikTok page. Ooh, bubble tea. Ooh, ooh, ooh. I'm like, okay, what is this? I need to try it. All of my friends are now drinking it. Joiba bubble tea comes in several delicious fruity flavored tea combinations with poppy

Enjoy your popping boba moment anytime, anywhere with Joiba Bubble Tea. Follow Joiba on Instagram and TikTok at joiba.fun for fun giveaways and to find a retailer near you.

Alright, Earl girls, let's see what you guys are dealing with this week, what I can do for you over here. This side of my room is looking a little bit more hot mess, even though this is actually, like, not too bad. I got this rack on Amazon, I hung my sweatsuits on there. Speaking of sweatsuits, all of the questions that you guys write in to me for What Would Alex Do? all ask about Hot Mess March. And I have a little treat for you guys. It is coming soon.

We were ready to put it out by Christmas and then I decided I did not like it and we started from scratch. So that's why it's been taking a little bit longer, but I wanted to make it extra good for you guys. I want the Earl girls to be walking around

loving their sweatsets loving their merch and I wanted to make it something that I would like die to buy like I wanted to make it something so cute so it's coming sorry it's taken a little bit of a while but I mean I'm so excited for us all to be wearing it

I'm excited to share it with you guys. All right, but let's get into what you guys wrote in. Alex, so I have been hanging out with this guy and I've went on a few dates with him. I think we do really get along and are very similar and we have so much fun together, but I got so drunk the last date and freaked out. I def came off psycho asking him, where do you see this going? And questions around that, but he texted me that I freaked him out and I was crazy. He's been distanced ever since. What should I do? He

What would Alex do? What would Alex do? Okay. Immediate first thought, the fact that he's very scared off of

you bringing that topic up and calling you crazy doesn't ring green flag to me. That's giving more of like a little bit of a red flag to me.

If you're still texting, he hasn't completely ghosted you. So you definitely could keep it up, keep it chill, keep it casual and, you know, maybe eventually hang out again and maybe you wait to bring up that topic again. But you're young, you're in college, okay? He is already freaked out by the fact of you asked where this is going. Maybe you're looking for a relationship. Alex, what would Alex do?

I think I would kind of be done with him. I think I would move on a little bit mentally. Like, I don't need to talk to him right now. I'm in college. I'm young. I'm having fun. And you don't need this guy, especially if it's a guy that's going to call you crazy. Okay? Don't let a guy call you crazy, even if you are crazy. Gaslight deny. So,

So I think I would back off and not in a way of like you're trying to play games, like try and see what else is out there. Like you don't need to give all your attention and thought and energy into this guy. If he comes back and you guys do have a really great connection, I think that's perfectly fine. And you hang out again and it's good. But for me, I'd probably be like, you know what? Not loving this right now and back off a little bit. See what else is out there. Hey,

Hang out with the guys at your college. The ones at mine weren't great, so if you're struggling with that, then I can relate to you on that. Hey, Alex. I've recently gotten to a fight with a friend over me not being her roommate for freshman year of college next fall. She's been super distant and only sending pics of her face to me. Hmm?

I've texted her twice explaining that I'm not completely aware of what's going on with our friendship after a month of her acting distant and she has ignored me since. Is it time to give up? I don't want the friendship to end but also don't want to seem desperate. Please help.

I love hot mess so much, by the way. I love you so much, by the way. All right, here's what Alex would do in this situation. First of all, I think it's completely fair if you're going to college with one of your friends from high school and your best friends love her, but you don't want to room together because college is all about meeting new people. And I will say I made so many friends literally with the girls I was living with

on my dorm room. My freshman year roommate, still my friend to this day. And I'm not saying you don't be friends with this person in college. I'm saying I think it's good for girls who are friends from high school to have different roommates so you guys can expand and meet more people and you're not just closing yourself off to girls that you already know. If your friend's being super distant with you, I think...

And she obviously is offended by the fact that you don't want to room together. So I think just be honest, you know, just say why you don't want to room together. Or maybe you don't want to room with her because you don't think you would get along rooming together. But if this is a good friend of yours...

You shouldn't have a problem saying that to her. You can, you know, be open and honest about this. But I don't think you seem desperate either. This isn't like a guy, you know? You're talking about one of your girlfriends. Like, just reach out to her. Be like, I really want to talk about this. And maybe make it a talk in person. Like, maybe not a text. Because I think sometimes...

your texts can get a little cryptic or you don't really know the tone of language that people are saying. And just be honest about why you don't want to room together. And if it is for the fact of that you want to meet other people, I think that's a perfectly good reason that you both should room with other girls to meet more girls. That doesn't mean that you don't want to be friends with her. In fact, when you're going to college, you're going to probably...

want her more than ever and you guys are going to want each other's support when you're in this new system and environment and community. So, I would say ask to hang out with her. Maybe call her if she doesn't want to hang out, but definitely have a conversation with her and just let her know the truth and let her know that you love her and that this has really upset you, but upset it. That's not a word, but just be open with her about that.

Have a talk. All right, this one's crazy. One of my closest friends is flirting a lot with my boyfriend. However, she denies everything, saying they're just really good friends and casually became closer to him right when we started dating. She even has a picture with him as her wallpaper. The worst part is he always ignores me and seems to prefer spending time with her. What would Alex do? Girl, run. I don't think that I'm getting...

green flags from the girlfriend or the boyfriend. She has him as her wallpaper. Hmm...

If one of my best friends had my boyfriend as her wallpaper and it wasn't in a way of like a funny joke of a picture that we all make fun of, I would probably punt her phone and kick it off the balcony. I don't know. I'm not really getting great vibes about this. I think maybe talk to your friend and be like, what's going on? But I'm also just like,

Definitely break up with a boyfriend, I think, and definitely run away from both of them. That's what I would do. "Hi Alex, hope you're doing well. I love watching all of your videos so much.

Aw, thank you. I love you too. You have really helped me with overcoming my fear of doing stuff when having acne, but I still have a really hard time. Ever since seventh grade, I've had acne and it doesn't seem to go away. All of my friends have clear faces and I just can't help but feel so ugly and dirty next to them. Do you have any tips for what to do to overcome this and improve my acne? First of all,

I am so sorry that you feel that way because I feel that way a lot of the time and I know it is the worst feeling in the world especially when all your friends are hanging out and you guys are just chilling like no one has any makeup on and you're like wow like you guys just have like

baby bottom perfect skin and I have lumps and bumps and redness and scars and I'm bleeding because I just picked my face. So I definitely feel you on that. It's not fun. It's not a great feeling. But I have to say that

you don't realize how much of that insecurity about your face or you said you feel dirty all of that comes from within yourself like no one else actually thinks your skin looks as bad as you think that it does and it's okay to not like the state of your skin and want to change it but you can't sit there and literally hate yourself over it and be disgusted with yourself because you're not disgusting it's

acne. Everyone gets acne, okay? Even if the girls in your close friend group don't have acne, I promise you it is so normal. So many people have acne. It's going to come and go. Maybe some of your friends don't have it right now. Maybe they're going to have it in a few years. Maybe they get adult onset acne. Like, you are so fine and you are completely normal for having acne on your skin. Just know it is normal and know that it does not make you any less beautiful than you are. If you are looking to clear your acne, I

I think definitely trying to find out the source of your acne. Like, where is it coming from? Is it hormonal acne? Is it gut health? Is it, you know, you're eating a food that's triggering your skin? Is it the products you're putting on your skin? Something I've been using lately, which has been helping me a lot, is I got this app. It's called Acne Safe. Basically, you just type in... Well, you go to Google, right? So say you're using...

some foundation, go to Google, look at the ingredients, you copy and paste the ingredients and you put it into this app. And then it tells you like if there's any pore clogging ingredients in there, anything you shouldn't be using, it will like highlight the product. And if not, it'll say like good to go. So make sure your makeup is clean. Make sure the face washes you're using, sunscreen, moisturizers, all of that is clean. You can check it in this app and make sure you're washing your makeup properly.

your makeup brushes just because those can hold a lot of bacteria and try and find the root cause of your acne because once you

find that it'll be a lot easier to kind of try and clear your acne or go down that process hi alex hope you're doing amazing i need your advice on something i went recently on a two-week trip to south america and on that trip i cheated on my boyfriend of two years oh boy i don't know what went over me but the moment it happened i instantly regretted it every time i talk to my boyfriend i think about it and the hate disappointment i feel towards myself is indescribable

Oh no. Girl. Girl, girl, girl. We have a predicament here. This is a tricky one. Oh lord. What would Alex do? What would Alex do? What would Alex do? What would Alex do?

Channeling, channeling, channeling, channeling. My first and initial thought here is if you cheated on him, is he really the one for you? And I know that sounds really bad and that's probably not the advice you wanted to hear, but if you cheated on him,

maybe maybe he is really great and maybe you do really love him but maybe you don't want a boyfriend right now like maybe that's not in the cards for you because i i'm not sure it's not giving to me that you're like so 110 like overly obsessed with this guy if that happened but also you could really be and i don't know oh my god this one's really stressing me out if you want to move forward and you want to have a good relationship with this guy you

and you do really, really, really, really, really think that, like, this is the one, and this is your man, I mean, he is your soulmate, I think you have to tell him. Because that guilt is never going to go away. If you stay with this guy for the rest of your life, you are going to think about this all the time. Now, now, now, now, if this is a guy that you are going to break up with, maybe, maybe,

maybe I would break up with him and not tell him that I cheated on him. And you know why? Protecting my own peace here.

If we're breaking up with him, I don't think you need to tell him. But if you want to stay with him, I think you need to tell him. And I think you just need to decide what do you want? Do you want to be together or do you not want to be together? It seems like you want to be together and you may tell him and then he may not want to be with you anymore. And we move on. We learn. We don't do it again. But that's probably the two paths I would go down. I think you have to really determine. Maybe go to therapy. Yeah.

Let's see a little life coach about this one.

I don't know. That one's really hard, but I think I would break up with him and not tell him, or I would tell him and maybe he would break up with me, or yeah, I don't know. So sorry. Wishing you the best of luck. Please let me know how this goes. Come back and update me. Love you. All right, but that is all for this week's episode of Hot Mess. Earl girls, you are the best. Don't forget to like, follow, subscribe to this podcast, share it with your friends, and

I hope you're all having a great week. I hope everyone is happy. And if you're not, if you need some help, write into What Would Alex Do so I could let you know what I would do. I'll see you guys next Thursday. Bye.