Matinee Monday: Snowmance
01:43:16 Share

How long have these meal kits been in my fridge? One week? Two? How much am I spending on these? Hey, Erica.

Did my subscription go up? When your questions about life turn into questions about money, there's Erica, the virtual financial assistant to help you spend, save, and plan smarter. Only from Bank of America. What would you like the power to do? Erica is only available in the English language. You must download the latest version of the mobile banking app only available on select mobile devices. Your chat may be recorded and monitored for quality assurance. Message and data rates and additional terms may apply. Bank of America and a member FDIC.

Hey, everybody. Just wanted to give you a quick heads up here. There's something we should all be doing. It's going to improve your life, make every day a little bit better. And that is eat more Reese's peanut butter cups. Yes. Think about it. All the gurus, all the coaches out there, they've never said the words eat more Reese's peanut butter cups.

Eat more Reese's. I mean, that combination of sweet chocolate and salty peanut butter. I mean, this is something that brings other people and ourselves joy. That's why there's two in a pack. Shop Reese's peanut butter cups now at a store near you, found wherever candy is sold, and often in my pantry because I love these.

Hey, everybody. Sweater weather is over and sweaty weather has begun. And that's why you need a pair of Bombas socks because they are a premium extra long staple cotton sock that feels light on your feet all summer long. I love my Bombas. Why? Because they support my arch. So get ready to get comfy and give back. Head over to Bombas.com slash bonkers. Use the code bonkers for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-O-N-K-E-R-S.

bas.com slash bonkers and use the code bonkers at checkout. I'd rather have a snow bow than no bow. We saw snowmance, so you know what that means. ... ... ... ... ...

♪♪ ♪♪

Hello, people of Earth. Hello, people of Twin Cities. And hello, people from around the world. Welcome to How Did This Get Made, a virtual live show. I am Tall John Shear, and we have a movie here for you that really is

is an interesting one. I didn't think that we would do another movie about a snowman coming to life, but here we are. Here we are once again, reminiscent of Jack Frost. This one's a little bit different. For 20 years, a girl creates her perfect, perfect man out of snow for a handful of days. And then...

longs for him all year long until one year it becomes true. But she doesn't know that. Actually, no one knows that. I have a lot of questions about this whole fucking snowman story. Anyway, that is the premise. That is the plot of Snowman's. You don't need to know more than that. But you do need to know that there's another man in the story. That man is her best friend who is...

in love with her and she doesn't know it. She doesn't know that there's love right in front of her face. And that's the story. Really, love, romance, what's better? Is there a difference? This movie seems to posit that there is. All right, well, here to discuss this film is Jason Manzoukas. Please welcome Jason Manzoukas. Yes! What's up, jerks? Here we go.

Here we go. Oh, Snowman. Jason, I know that you love a rom-com. Snowman is better than no man's, Paul. I know. Well, that's what I was saying. I was, I brought it back to the beginning. I said, I'd rather have a snow bow than no bow. But there is, you know, we are in our second snowman who's come to life film.

And there's so much. And not only that, the third inanimate object that comes to life Christmas movie because the Nutcracker one. Wow. Wasn't that last year or was that two years ago? That was last year. Yeah. It comes to life. So we are unbeknownst to me.

We exist in a world in which there is a common fantasy that a inanimate Christmas object will come to life and be your dream man? Is that like, that's like a series.

It's a pattern. It's sad to me to think that we have come so far in humanity that we believe an inanimate object will give us more joy than a human being that we live. Does he have a dick? That's what I want to know. I still dick. Does he have a dick? Well, let's get into it. I don't want to go down any rabbit hole too far. But for the rest of the show, I want you to know that you can call me Quaint Paul because I am just like her dad, Quaint Paul's furniture.

St. Paul, Quaint Paul. And you know what? A person has been calling me Quaint Paul for a very long time. Please welcome my other co-hosts, June Diane Raphael. Welcome, June. Oh, my word. Oh, my goodness gracious. Oh, me. Oh, my. Now, listen, Paul, Jason, I'm so happy to see you both. Sometimes I come to this podcast...

Begrudgingly. You know, I've had to watch this whole movie. So much has upset me. Tonight, for this live show, I couldn't be happier to be here. I couldn't be happier. I couldn't be more ready to get into this. I loved every second of it. I have notes. This is maybe the most notes I've ever taken on a movie. Me too. Same. Same.

I took so many notes, Paul. I took so many notes that I was worried about the audio in terms of having to like flip pages. So I have them all laid out in like all these legal pages over the desk because there's there are just there's so much to say. All right. Well, let's get into it. This movie opens up with an image that I think.

is very disturbing, which is a young girl makes a snowman and is about to like start making out with it. - What's disturbing? - She is going-- - You didn't, wait, you're saying you didn't practice making out with like objects that you would create in the wild outside in the world?

Interesting. Like ball of snow, like to put her tongue into, because she looked like she was going to give a tongue kiss to it. She was really going in. Here's what I'm going to say. Yeah. Here's what I'm going to say. Controversial statement. I'm coming in hot. That is the most romantic kiss of the movie.

Well, I said to Paul at one point. The most chemistry between any couple is between that little girl and that snowman. You know what? You know what? You might be right. Because I said to Paul at one point, I'm like, have these two, Sarah and like current snowman, Cole. Snowbo. Have these two.

Like, has anything, have they kissed? Nothing. They appeared to have done nothing. Between these two people. Well, once again, these movies reveal themselves to be so chaste and so desexualized as to like, as to live in a world in which. But yet also perverted. Oh, hugely perverted. Deeply perverted. Deeply perverted. And deeply, like, here's the thing.

I would understand. I would understand it if this movie, if the people in this movie, Sarah, Nick, I guess Cole, but Sarah and Nick primarily, were like in their early 20s.

These people are in their 30s and they are acting like children. These are adults. I mean, I just, I want to get into like the mythology of the snowman, but I do just for the audience here, just showing this opening. Just the T report. Oh, oh,

Look at that. A Moroccan mint, guys. A Moroccan mint. I'll take a sip of it. Talk about adults. I'll take a sip of an adult drink. Thank you. I have my Santa mug and I am drinking some bourbon. Oh, nice. Some bullet bourbon. There we go. Okay. Let's take a look at this first clip of just the kiss because I want to just see this. This basically is the premise of the whole movie. It was love at first sight. Anyone could see that.

And it was obvious that this would be nothing short of a whirlwind romance. Nothing was going to keep us apart. Dean Papadopoulos, I love you. And I think you feel the same way about me. Don't you? What are you doing?

I don't know if she's attracted to a snowman or she's using it as a sexual toy, but this is where the movie. I don't think she's using it as a, hold on. I don't think she's using it as a sexual toy. Let me be very clear. I don't know that she's not actually. You think this is going to escalate?

Well, no, here's my thought. Well, I don't know. The carrot, there are all sorts of things that could happen. Okay. Okay. I didn't know. I didn't know what was happening. None of us know. You know, but to Paul's point, Jason, and to yours earlier, like the nutcracker was at least like shaped like a man, like a figure. It was figurative. Agree. It was, yes. This? No. This blob? No.

This is look at this. Look at she is going in for it. She was going in and a nice romantic kiss. Here's what I'll say. What is a sex toy? A sex toy is something that you would. This is something I'm glad you're defining because I've long wondered. So please, Paul, I'm just saying I'm just saying that like she is clearly in the beginning. She believes that that is not the boy that she wants. She's creating an image of him. And then

And connecting with it in an intimate way. That to me would be a sex toy. It's an object that she's treating as human for pleasure.

All right, well, now I'm back on Jason's side. I want to get off this. Together. Holy cow. That is, I mean, I could, we could spend the rest of the night unpacking what you just said. Because, Paul, she is, she's playing house in this. She's, yes, exactly. She's not playing house. She's not playing house. She stole a boy's hat. She stole his hat and she got his, wow. We don't know. We don't know that she stole it.

Whoa, wait, how did she come to the... She just happens to be in possession of it. Yeah, okay. We're giving this girl way too much leeway. She stole the hat. She's kind of creating some sort of ceremony here so the snowman smells like this young boy. So you think she's like a witch?

That she got the boy's hat. She created a, this, so you think this is like a magic movie in which a young witch conjures the perfect boyfriend? There is witchy shit in here. Well, actually, that is the movie, though. I think you did, that is actually the movie. So now I'm back with Paul. But the craziest part of this movie, I mean, there's so much insanity, but to just get into the magic of it.

You know, because all of these, and I don't know, is this a Lifetime movie? Because I feel like a lot of different platforms are now... Okay, a lot of different platforms are now creating their own, like, genre of Lifetime Christmas movie. And a lot of them have these magical elements like Nutcracker. But...

What we learn in these flashbacks of 18 years. I want to respect the title. A very netty Christmas. 18 years ago, 11 years ago, three years ago now, is that every year, these two adults, adults.

get together to decades. I'm going to say they are in their mid-30s. I'm going to say they are early to mid-30s. That's how they're cast. That is how they're cast. I'm going to say they're in their 30s. They seem to me to be people in their 30s. His hair is receding. Yes, they're in their mid-30s. And I'm just trying to wrap my mind around these two people, friends, not friends, whoever they are to each other.

Getting together. Oh, I know. But I'm saying in any relationship, this is strange. They get together every year to create a snowman that is the ideal version of the man that she wants to fall in love with. Yeah. That. Yes, yes.

It's a very cuckolded position, I believe, of that boy because he is getting nothing in return. Yes. Well, but the only thing they're doing, though, really, because they are not like master snow builders. What they're doing is creating foundation. Well, later, but foundationally just a regular snowman and putting different. And I mean, like, not that different, actually items on him. Yeah.

With the one exception, which is that at the end of every montage, there's a montage that kind of time elapses us from whenever they are at 12 or 13 all the way through to adulthood. So that gives you the sense of time elapsing.

of time passing, she always takes Nick's hat off his head and puts it on the snowman. So every time it's her best friend's. So the first hat is the hat that is Dean Greek last names. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

He was very astute, by the way. Dean Papadopoulos comes in with very little information, just that his hat's on a snowman. He's like, hey, is that me? Are you trying to make out with me? And then destroys himself. He's not wrong. He's not wrong. But he's very astute for a young boy and then destroys the effort. Him destroying himself was very interesting because in the reality of this movie, that is Cole. Or is Cole the next one?

Cole is the one that they made in the- Cole's the last one. Is the last one. No, Cole says, I always loved looking at this house. He was always there. Oh my God, you're right, Paul. He's been there from the beginning. He's been there from the beginning, Jason. Every snowman is Cole? Yes. Every snowman is Cole. Okay. Because he also does seem to know all the other snowmen in town. Yeah.

Okay. Okay. Coal has been worked on. This is what's troubling. So I think, Paul, you're absolutely right. They have been working on building coal their entire lives since they were six years old. Now, the thing that's so strange in the movie, though, and I want to still get to the magical piece and the mom scarf that comes into play and when those coal eyes twinkle. I'd love to discuss whether coal is good or evil. Evil. Okay, so what I was going to say about coal is...

He and Nick have such an antagonistic relationship. But Nick has really made Cole. Like, Nick is Cole's maker. Sure. You know? Yeah.

Yes. He's his God. No, no, no, no. Cole seems to exist as the human embodiment of the wishes. Sarah continues to wish what she wants from the perfect man, a sense of adventure. So Cole is an adventure travel guy. Sweep her off her feet. Adventure tourism. He comes in and does that. Adventure tourism, rather. Like, she has this list of

what she wants from the perfect man. And Cole represents the personification of that list. Well, of that, it seems to me that while Cole has been the same for 20 some odd years, by the way, she's 29. By the way, in the movie or in the movie, in the movie. So, okay. Still too old to be. So Cole is the,

Not the amalgamation of all the ones because we saw a punk rocker. We saw a goatee wearing one. We saw some very different personalities. I mean, they listed, they like, they stood in that one moment of them like playing air guitar for way too long. But he is the personification of the most recent Cole, right? So like every year changes based on what she wants. So this year she wants the travel writer and she is the architect. But then when he says he's always been there. Yeah.

And he's always wanted this for her. What is he referencing? Well, he also says, I've always loved this house. Yeah. Which means he's been there every year. I think...

I think there's some, I think the movie, let's be clear. I don't think the movie has a clear mythology, but I think some version of what the mythology is, is the spirit of Sarah's perfect man as personified inside of the snowman has existed throughout all of the snowmen that she and Nick build together. Somehow in this instance, it comes to life. Okay.

So Cole has all these kind of memories of, I always loved this house, dot, dot, dot. But like, so he seems to be a representation of her, her in immature desires or immature ideas of what the perfect man is. Well, I mean, are we just basically saying, I mean, well, well, we should get into the lesson in a second. I want to bring up something that June brought up. And actually I saw somebody in the chat bring this up as well, but I have this written down. You said,

that Nick is Cole's maker. So would that make Nick Cole's father? Yeah.

Yes, it would also make Sarah Cole's mother. No, that doesn't make any sense because Sarah, they are building a perfect boyfriend. They're not building a son. Okay, so you're saying that Sarah is not a parent. Nick is participating in building his own competition every year. I don't think Nick is Cole's god.

Because Cole is negging Nick the entire movie, calling him little, calling him little guy, like treating him like he's the, in a traditional rom-com, you know, like this would be, Cole would be like, have a sweet face to Sarah and then snarky and shitty to the competition, to her friend, right? And he'd be like- That's not really what happens here. No, but it's a little bit like that. Cole is a little bit of a dick to Nick.

I have so many issues about little guy. Always calling him little guy and being like, come on, little guy. I mean, listen, I thought Cole was amazing. Paul knows I was taken with Cole. June jumped out of the bed when that shirt came off. When that shirt came off, I was hooting and hollering.

I was like, yes, thank you. It was so great. And I think this actor is wonderful and an untapped talent. I thought he was hilarious. The scene in which I know you were going to play it, but the scene in which he's just standing as a snowman.

And, you know, he delivered. With his, like, dead eyes. And she has to, like, force him to engage. It was hilarious. So my point, though, Paul, is that Cole, Cole is a, Cole,

actually is a grown man. And I love that that actor chose to be, he's playing something that is for children. You know, he's an object that is a child's object. A child's, like a child's wish. A child's wish, a play thing. Yes. And he plays it, he made the choice to play it like a grown man. And I thought it was such a great choice. And I felt that he was an antagonistic character.

I know I said he was antagonistic before. I felt like he was treating Nick the way Nick deserved to be treated.

No, no, no, no. Okay, wait. Strong disagree. Yes. Because here's the thing. Sorry. What we know about Cole is this. Can we all agree? I think we need to set a baseline here. Cole is a fucking liar. Cole does not work for an extreme travel agency. He's lying. Yeah, what? I disagree. You think he works for... You think he has parents? No.

No, none of that is real. Here's my question. Okay. How does Cole have a phone?

He's not even wearing. How does Cole have a phone? To me, like, let's go back to the Nutcracker movie. A very nutty Chris. Yes, where does Cole live? How does he have pants? Where did he get the pants? I believe Cole goes outside and turns into a snowman at night. I don't know. No. No. No, I'm not. I don't really know. Well, maybe he does, though. But what I'm saying is, like, when the very, the rules, they're very bad about the rules in this movie. There's no rules.

They were good about the movie, the rules in the Nutcracker movie, right? Yeah. A very nutty Christmas. A very nutty Christmas. When he comes to life, he has a purpose, a drive. He's going to help her. It's like this movie lacked the hijinks that that movie had because Cole, as a snowman, come to life, should be not

good at interacting with the world. And in fact, he's just doing all of the boyfriend stuff that a 12-year-old imbued him with. And as a result, I agree with June, his performance is childlike because his entire persona is that of, he's been populated by the wishes of a young girl for all these years. Hard, hard disagree.

I needed him to get into more interactions with more people because he actually seems like a real man, and I don't think he is. He's a snowman. Well, this is my question. Okay, well, this is the issue. What is he? Is he a demon? Is he, like, because what he is is...

I also wrote, is Cole a demon in my notes? Yeah. I wrote that in my notes. What is he? Is Cole a demon? We don't know any rules. There's no logic. He's got money. I'm all for a magical movie. I'm all for a magical movie, but there's no elf story.

here, like in the sense of like the buddy, the elf comes to New York. He's like, oh my gosh, what the world's great. Like he's not impressed by the world. He knows the world. He's telling her that he like works for a travel agency. These are all lies that will eventually be revealed. He is a bad guy. Well, when I don't

But you're, I think, I agree with the first part of your story because, or your theory, because Nick is constantly peppering him with questions and Cole has no answers, right? None. But I don't think he's bad. I don't think his, I don't think he has malice or malicious intent. I don't think he is a evil character. I think he, I think he is just bad.

He is two dimensional because that is what she thinks she wants is something that isn't that doesn't have depth, that doesn't have reality. They hurt. Cole is a representation. Oh, my God. We're getting into Drop Dead Fred. Holy. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

Today's podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. I love Squarespace. I'm in the middle of trying to balance my business life and my real life. This work-life balance, it's tough. But Squarespace has been helping me by giving me the tools to reach my goals and have time to celebrate. That's right, Squarespace is the all-in-one

website platform for entrepreneurs to stand out and succeed online. With the guided design system of Squarespace Blueprint, you can select from curated layouts to styling options optimized for every device. Get your website discovered fast with integrated optimized SEO tools. Plus, make checkout easy for customers with easy-to-use payment tools. You can accept credit cards, PayPal, Apple Pay. Plus, with Squarespace AI, you can explain what your site is about. You choose your tone and enter what you need to get auto-generated.com.

perfect text. Anyway, I love Squarespace. I've been building sites with them from the beginning. And when I launched my book, I said, I'm doing it all myself on Squarespace. And I'm very pleased with it. Head to squarespace.com for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, go to squarespace.com slash bonkers to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

Have kids at home? Then you know parenting is hard. From balancing family with work to juggling the family calendar, you might need some help. If you need a sitter or nanny, then you gotta check out Care.com. Sure, you could use social media to find sitters or nannies, but how reliable are those referrals, really? I mean, there's a reason why 29 million families have turned to Care.com. Every caregiver you hire is background checked, which is

so important for peace of mind. It is easy to find full-time, part-time, or even occasional help for date nights or even a day to yourself. You can search for sitters and nannies in your neighborhood, view rates, and book highly rated caregivers that fit your budget and schedule. Even better, you can reach out to multiple caregivers for interviews and message safely in the app. No more phone tag. Get the help and the break you deserve with Care.com. You'll be glad you did. That's Care.com.

When you're hiring for your small business, you want to find quality professionals that are right for the role. That's why you have to check out LinkedIn Jobs. LinkedIn Jobs has the tools to help you find the right professionals for your team faster and for free. LinkedIn isn't just a job board. LinkedIn helps you hire professionals you can't find anywhere else, even those who aren't actively searching.

70% of users don't visit other leading job sites. If you're not looking on LinkedIn, you're looking in the wrong place. LinkedIn knows that small businesses might not have the time or resources, so they're constantly finding ways to make the process easier.

86% of small businesses get a qualified candidate within 24 hours. They even just launched a feature that helps you write job descriptions, making the process even easier and quicker. Post your job for free at linkedin.com slash valuable. That's linkedin.com slash valuable to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply.

I believe Cole is not evil at all, but I believe he is the collection of when she says that list and they do, they repeat it a number of times. He is the physical representation of that list.

But yet, okay, what's his endgame? Because he says, oh, my hands are cold. So is he a snowman? Does he have any, like... He's going to go away. Well, but that's my question. Because he was a snowman. He says his purpose is to show her true love. Now, why in this movie, all snowmen need to...

Well, or at least he needs to leave by Christmas. I don't know. Yes. Like, I don't know why Christmas is. He says he needs to leave by Christmas. He was taking her with like, so his whole game plan was that she was going to leave him. No. Yes. His whole game plan is he it's very carefully worded. He says, I'm here to make you find love.

Right? But what she thinks is with him and what he means is with Nick. He is a catalyst to show her that she's really in love with Nick. So what is he doing with Hank the Snowman? Because Hank the Snowman is at work, so he's going to go play in the park. I mean, he does have downtime, Paul. He's got friends to visit. Yeah, he's got to kill some hours. Now, Cody, I just saw put in the chat that there's a Team Nick, Team Cole thing going on in the show's chat. Oh.

And I have to push back. It is not possible to be Team Nick. There is no Team Nick. Nick is the wrong choice. I mean, that's the interesting thing about this movie is I don't think I've ever rooted so hard for the wrong guy. You know, I knew we were set up to want her to be with Nick. And I'm just like, go to Paris. Go to Paris for seven days or 10 days or whatever it is. Fuck.

Fuck the snowman and then come back. He's got an ice dick, June. He's got an ice dick. That's the t-shirt. That's the t-shirt. Fuck the snowman. If his hands are cold, if his fingers are cold, imagine what his dick would be like. He's constantly, I mean, I'm just, I'm not trying to be too gross about this. Let me be very clear. In the mythology of the movie, there is no going to Paris with coal. Okay. He knows that's not going to happen. He had a ticket, though.

It's all because she needs to realize she should be with Nick. But to June's point, here's what's interesting. The movies, they have terrible chemistry. I really missed Melissa Joan Hart. I really missed some of the people that have been in some of these other movies. She gave a spark, yeah. If they had sold...

If they had sold us on the chemistry between Sarah and Nick, this movie would have worked so much better. But we have, it's almost as if they meet once a year to make that snowman. Their relationship seems so distant from each other, but they're best friends who live in the same town and see each other, I believe, all the time. They're best friends. She's a very sour character. I found her to be sour grapes. Oh.

They also seem to live in like Stars Hollow. They seem to live in the tiniest of tiny towns, but they live in the Twin Cities, which is a thriving metropolis. I also need to talk about this paper she works up, but I want to get, I don't want to go too far away from Cole. I do want to say too, that Sarah reprimands Nick for having his feet up on his own couch.

Why is Nick's door a bank vault door? I was very confused by that. So the way they set up Nick, I mean, this is the thing about these movies. Whenever in one of the Lifetime movies you see a man who has like a messenger bag on, you know, immediately we as the audience are supposed to think like he's like a real like renegade kind of guy. Like he's the artist. He's like not in a suit at all.

And I knew we were supposed to think that about him, that he wasn't sort of the obvious choice. But it's like, I am so...

turned off by this gentleman. Oh, come on. And for you, wait, do you think, can I ask you, June, do you think men in messenger bags, do you have a take on this? Like, is that like a, oh, you just, that look. Wow. That look says a lot. I mean, Jason, I'm learning so much about my wife. What if I was wearing a messenger bag, what if I was wearing a messenger bag and drinking tea? What would you think? Listen, I do think that there was a time in New York City when I was going to NYU where everybody,

every guy was like starting out with messenger bags and it was such a look. And then there's sort of like the corporate messenger bag, which is like the guy who's like, I'm not going to carry a suitcase. I'm going to carry a messenger bag.

I don't like what it says, you know, I'm like, my mom once got me leather, like a lead, a fully leather saddlebag. And she's like, this is you. And I was like, it's not me. It was so like, it was like that, that middle ground, which I've seen so much. Like I'm wearing a suit and my briefcase is like a $600, like, like messenger bag because I'm still cool. I still got it. I still got it. Yeah.

And also for him, it's like, why do you need that messenger bag? Because all of your work seems to be on one iPad. And I know we're going to get into the iPads in this movie. And I know Paul has a lot to say about that. I mean, this movie, no one has a fucking iPhone. Everyone has an iPad. You're a cartoonist, but you don't have tools in there. Like you don't have brushes and palettes and canvases. Like you just have, you have this finger.

and this screen. That's it. He may have an Apple pen. He might have some sort of stylus. I do believe he can do that. I want to talk about this guy, this cartoonist who is not working, getting rejection letters that can fill the room. Let's just take a look at this vault door in this apartment because for a person that is completely unemployed,

All right. There's the vault door. He's living it up. It's so, I mean, what is like, and even the sound. It's not like they foley into it. It sounds as though like it's, it's, it's, it's, you know, like from a bank. He's not working in an old bank. I mean, this is not like a, not a rent. This confounded me. This is what's so weird about him. Cause like, he's supposed to be this interesting, the way they set him up as a six year old. He's got that fun haircut. He's supposed to be like an artist.

You know, but they put him in that sweater. Well, he's got it. It's interesting. They've set him up as, I think in order to set him against Cole, they've set him up as like kind of a failure, insecure, someone who's never succeeded. You know, she's basically like, everything's not so, what did she say? Everything's not so great in the cartooning world or something. I can't find the quote. I wrote it down at one point. I wrote down something.

But I was like, wouldn't you know that you're his best friend? Mustn't this be what you guys talk about all the time? But Jason, she's a terrible friend. She never asks him one question. She never just says like, hey, are you interested in dating anyone?

Yeah. Like, if you had any, like, interesting experiences with women. Are you a three-dimensional person or are you just a reflection of my needs from you? They meet or they don't meet, but they get together and the idea of this tradition, this snowman tradition, is born because he was dumped and she was...

Like, cause she like the, you know, Dean Papadopoulos knocks over the, the, the snowman. And then all of a sudden he comes over. He's like, Oh, Jen doesn't like me either. And then they build their perfect snowman for her, but she doesn't go like, let's now build a snow woman. Like she, like she just takes it. And then we find out that he actually dated her.

And what was that like? A part of the mythology of this movie, though, that's so strange, aside from the snowman, although connected, you're right, Paul, to that first moment, is that her breakups are like iconically embarrassing. Yeah.

And it's just weird. Like the one that we- And everyone knows about it. Everyone knows this. They're like the part of the town's lore. But the weirdest thing is- At the beginning, she's broken up with Brian and her dad knows and Nick knows the break. And then she reveals they've only been dating for two weeks.

And not only that, but when... Who would tell somebody about someone they've only been dating for two weeks? No idea. You're an adult. You're an adult. You're an adult woman. You're an adult woman. And how many dates have you done in two weeks to even make it like a breakup? Like, that seems like... It's not a breakup. It's just sort of a didn't work out. It's not a breakup. It's insignificant. It's something that happened.

Now, and the weirdest thing about how embarrassed she is, is when you see his animation, his cartoon of what happened on the last date. Now, when we're in present present day times, it's that they broke up and then the waiter spilled soup. Well, to add insult to injury or injury to insult or whatever, she broke up with him and then the waiter spilled.

poured soup in his lap and they're laughing at this. Like they're awful people. She's an awful person. Yeah. I didn't quite, I didn't clock that either. She just seems to have no interest in Nick's emotional life. I think,

because were she to be curious, she would have to understand and acknowledge the obvious fact, which is that he is visibly in love with her in every scene that they're in together. Because otherwise, she just must think like, oh, this is my friend Nick. He's asexual, which is like great and fine. Oh, yeah.

Yeah, like he doesn't- Why not have Nick have- We never populate Nick's life so that he's had exes that we meet in town or something like that. We don't understand him to be a three-dimensional person. He only- If you told me that this movie in the last moments pulled out-

And like, it was like, it was like WandaVision. Like, like she was the only real person and she was populating everybody in the thing with her mind. Like, I would believe that because nobody exists but for their reflection in her eyes. Well, to me, I would have been very happy to see Nick and the elk jerky girl get it on.

Oh, I loved her. I love her and Cole and the boss. Wonderful performances. Now, also, I would have loved to have seen like two months from the end of the movie, because I think what's going to happen to Nick, who seems like a genuinely nice person. Wait a second. Are you changing your tune on Nick?

No, I do think Nick's a genuinely nice person. Yeah. I really do. I also think there's like no competition though. And there's no reason for the way he's behaving throughout the movie, why she should be interested in him because he's, um,

But I do think he is a nice person. But what's going to happen to Nick two months from the end of the movie, which I'd love to see, is that he's going to realize that this woman is incredibly selfish. And he's not going to be interested in her. Here's the headline. Here's the headline. And this is what makes the movie tough. Nick and Sarah will succeed because they're both duds. They're both duds. Amen. Amen.

They're both duds and they deserve each other. I was not into, I wasn't rooting for them. Not that I was rooting against them. They don't deserve love. They don't deserve love. Wait, Paul, they don't deserve love? They don't deserve love. They deserve the love of each other, which is an Ikea showroom version of love. Just like Nick's house, it's empty, but it looks pretty. That's it. Here are the people in the movie who deserve love.

Dean Papadopoulos. No, no. That dickhead? He deserves love. Her boss. Her friend, the elk lady. Sure.

Elk Lady is a straight up murderer. Like Elk Lady is killing too much elk. I love Elk Lady. I want that movie. See, that's the thing is a lot of the other holiday movies we've done were better populated with more characters like Elk Jerky Lady and the boss and all those people. And this movie was, I think the cast list of this movie is a grand total of six speaking parts. I mean, it's dad, daughter, two dudes. Remember like the Nutty Christmas? They went to a big party.

It's six. It is six. Like there was a lot going on. No, there are six people here. I think it's six speaking parts. Yes, it's her. By the way, is the elk lady, I have a question about this. Is elk lady a journalist? Like why is elk lady coming? She works at the magazine. I don't know what her job is. Okay, so the assignment that they get

By the way, I have issues about this. I have so many things I want to unpack. Again, it's a Twin Cities magazine, which is Minneapolis, St. Paul, which is a digital magazine. Digital magazine. It was called a digital magazine. Oh, okay.

I thought it was a magazine magazine, but it's the same thing. I mean, it makes sense. But even a digital magazine, the infrastructure of that, like that must be one of the, I mean, this movie is fairly recent. Again, it looks like the Stars Hollow newspaper. It looked like they were, dude, they were making a pamphlet for a time. It looks, this movie is obviously shot in a tiny Canadian town. The movie is like relentlessly Canadian in a way that is like almost unimaginable.

an attack. I consider it like... Paul said at one point, he's like, oh, wow, they're all doing Canadian accents. I go, Paul, those are Midwestern accents. Well, I feel like those Midwestern accents were like, we watch a lot of Fargo and we're going to do the best job that we can. Because like, it was like Mare of Easttown. It's like all of a sudden one character is like going like,

I'm mayor of Easttown. Check out this Pennsylvania accent. You're like, this is my Pennsylvania accent or Pittsburgh accent, whatever that is. And then everyone else is like, I don't have that. Why make it, why make them, what I couldn't figure out is, why make them, why make it Minneapolis-St. Paul if it's obviously a tiny small town in the Midwest or it's just Canada? Because her desire to travel, her desire to see the world, these are two thriving cities that have

and, you know, like massive populations. And, you know, like it didn't make sense to me. They're acting as Sarah. Sarah is pitching a travel segment for the, like she's pitching a brand new segment of the magazine. And they're like, no, no, no, no, no. This is Twin Cities magazine. We don't like, we only cover-

twin cities goings on. Like we are not catering to the traveler. Here's what we could cover. Prince.

From that area. You know what I mean? Like, it's not like this seems to be shot. Like, he shows up in a carriage. They drive through, like, what looks to me like the wilderness in the carriage. Also, how long is that lunch break? They seem to go on lunch break for, like, six hours. And they go to, like, a fancy restaurant. Time and place are irrelevant. They're going to, like, a four-star, like, evening place for... Okay, to just talk about this...

Cause him seeing the deer, which is clearly stock footage is amazing. But when they go to, when they go to dinner or lunch or whatever they go to lunch, there are carrots on his plate. And he's like, Oh, like he gets freaked out that there's a carrot there. And I'm like, Oh, he probably won't eat those carrots. Then he kind of picks up the carrot and like smells it. Like,

And so is he going to eat himself? Like, I don't understand what the snowman is. I think he's thinking like, is this an, am I about to eat a nose? Is this a nose? Are they serving me nose?

Interestingly, I don't believe we ever see Cole eat or drink. And he's afraid of fire and is comfortable in the most frigid of temperatures with the cold. So he is literally a flesh handsome. He's a hunky snowman. He is just a snowman. She chiseled abs on him.

I mean, this is the issue. So here's my question to you, because my issue is that we think this is a movie about Sarah finding true love, but it seems to me that to June's point, this is a movie about Nick getting true love. Like Nick is his creator and it looks like, yes, it's, it is presenting as if it's Sarah's wish, but it truly is Nick's wish. Well, sure. Huh? Yeah.

But it truly is about. It's truly about. You're saying it's Nick's wish to be that snow person of her dreams. What it is, is like this snowman motivates Nick. Nick says, I've loved you since the day that we met. She's like, well, if you thought that, why are you saying it now? Which is such a dick response. But like it motivates Nick to be.

not passive anymore. Like Nick makes more character choices in this movie than Sarah does. Here's what I'll say. I can come at it from a different point of view, which is that Cole-

Cole is the catalyst for both of these people to realize that they are in love. But what does she realize? They're telling her, don't fall in love. They're saying, like, everyone basically says, sure, you love this guy, or sure, he's romantic. Sure, it's fun. But that's not love. Love is not fun. You know, I kept on asking, like, well, what is love then? Why are they making such a distinction between love and romance? Or true love and romance? Well, I feel like what they were saying was...

I felt like what they were saying was you as an adult are coveting, are thinking what love is, is the things that a 12-year-old thinks love is. No, it's a 29-year-old. And real love, real love is about, the father says it. Yes, of course, when I saw your mother with the red scarf, she stuck out. But then we really had to be in love. And what that means is, what we all know, is doing the work of being in love. It's not about the...

like a lightning bolt hitting you and somebody sweeping you off your feet and taking you on adventures. It is in the beginning. You have to like, like that is the problem. What everybody is telling her is like, don't look for that special feeling. Don't find that spark. And it's like, yeah, you don't need that spark.

Yes, and which isn't to say, which isn't to say that that can't transform and grow and that longer relationships have more depth to them. What they're saying is you're only looking for that special feeling because when it starts to fade, she bails on relationships. Her character's backstory is she has myriad boyfriends who...

who wants that stage, which is called limerence. Whoa, wait, hold on, Jason. Back it up. Wait, so talk to me about limerence. I've never heard this term before. Limerence is the honeymoon phase. Limerence is the initial part of a relationship where you are just getting that...

You know, that hit of like, oh, my God, this person is so exciting. Oh, my God. Everything we're describing. Right. And but the problem is when when limerence ends, the actual relationship, an adult relationship has to happen. Sarah thinks love is limerence all the time. And so when it stops, she breaks up with every boyfriend. And that is her problem.

I guess I would agree with that if it seemed like she was even getting past the stage of limerence with these other men. It seems to me like she's... But that's what the movie is telling us. Like with Brian, the boyfriend at the beginning. I guess, but again, two weeks. Two weeks? I would hope limerence would last for like six months. I mean, Jim and I have been together for almost like 20 years. I mean, I've barely... Has it ended yet, Jim? I think, no, I'm still in total limerence.

I think the movie is telling us for her, the minute she sees something real that isn't these adventurous this, this, and this, she bails. And what her dad and what other people are trying to say is actually love starts like that, but it actually has much more depth and much more... Right, so she's not doing... That's wonderful. That's so wonderful. And love that. Love that for her. Love that for everyone. Cole represents only limerence.

And Nick, I think, poorly represents... Zero limerence. The idea... Yes, zero limerence, but the promise of...

A substantial love. But to throw her onto him, to force her to consider him, to have so many people telling her that she should consider Nick, like, without any, when she doesn't feel that, and for her to, it felt like she was getting brainwashed to just. Yes.

look for someone who has been there for a long time. You need to settle, settle, settle. And by the way, I'm, I'm a big believer. Like I, uh, I read this book that, uh, was really, uh, transformative for me, but there was this idea that like sometimes settling is viewed as a bad thing, but settling is really just making a choice. And instead of not making a choice, right? Like you've like, we have this idea of like, uh,

like FOMO, but FOMO is why I made this choice and I didn't do that thing. So I like enjoy your settling. But to me, it felt like, oh, Sarah, stop looking for the big thing. Just you got somebody here who's going to be here. Like it didn't feel like we saw enough of them really. Don't worry about falling in love. And that, that was troubling to me. Well, I think what they were saying was, um,

I think what the movie is trying to say is love doesn't just look like what you thought it looked like at 12. Love is adult, long-lasting love is a different thing. And you have shut yourself off to that because you're so consumed with checking these boxes of a list that you made when you were 12 years old, you know?

But, Jason, you keep on saying this thing. You keep on saying this thing about 12 years old. Because I will say... All right, so I guess... I want to understand where we're... I only say it because they keep repeating her list, and it's the same list. Okay, okay, so...

I see what you're saying. So she's always like, I want someone to sweep me off my feet. Somebody's adventure. Okay, got it. Okay, so I guess what I was saying was I felt like she made the list at 29. And Cole is all of those things. Okay, all right, I get you. So she's never changed what she wanted. She has not grown. Every now and then there's a rock and roll guy or something. Sarah is emotionally 12 years old and her understanding about what adult love looks like. Boom, I am single.

Have you ever browsed an incognito mode? You probably think, oh, wow, that's safe. It's not. Not as safe as you think. In fact, all of your online activity is still 100% visible to a ton of third parties unless you use ExpressVPN. ExpressVPN reroutes 100% of your traffic through secure encrypted servers so third parties can

can't see your browsing history. And it is so easy to use. Fire up the app and click one button to get protected. It works on all devices, phones, laptops, tablets, and more. ExpressVPN is rated number one by top tech reviewers like CNET and The Verge.

And I got to tell you, whenever I connect to public Wi-Fi at a coffee shop or at the airport, I always use ExpressVPN because you never know how secure a public network is. And I feel so much more at ease knowing that I'm not being tracked. So protect your online privacy today by visiting ExpressVPN.com slash HDTGM. That's E-X-P-R-E-S-S-V-P-N.com slash HDTGM. And you can get an extra three months free. ExpressVPN.com slash HDTGM.

Drive into summer with the Honda CR-V and Accord, your fun-to-drive weekend getaway vehicles. From Honda, the 2024 Kelley Blue Book's KBB.com Best Value brand. So hurry in to the Honda Summer Event. For a limited time, well-qualified buyers can get a 2.9% APR on a 2025 CR-V or 2024 Accord. See dealer for financing details based on 2024 Consumer Choice Awards from Kelley Blue Book. Visit KBB.com for more information.

Get ready to rack to school at your Nordstrom Rack store, because the deals are amazing. Levi's, Adidas, Volcom, and Hurley from only $20. Save on everyone's favorite denim, sneakers, boots, backpacks, and more at Nordstrom Rack. But hurry, get first dibs on new arrivals from just $20 and make it the best school year ever. Great brands, great prices. That's why you rack.

What I wish I had seen from her and Nick is the only act of kindness was that she like got him a job at the, at the online magazine, um,

That's it. But that's a great thing. That's a huge thing. It was a very nice thing. But I would have loved to have seen them having a laugh together, taking the piss out of each other. Oh, their chemistry should have been palpable. Yeah. And it's like these two people seem to not like each other, actually. Yeah.

Oh, I'll go one step further. They seem to not know each other. Yes, yes. They're constantly telling us they're best friends and they seem to not know each other. So much so that I was like, oh, she lives, for a long part of the movie, I was like, oh, she lives somewhere else and only comes home at Christmas. That's true.

That's what it seemed like. Right? Or he did. Or he did. And this is just like a Christmas friendship. For half of the movie, I thought he was visiting because she says I've never left town. I thought he was visiting. Then I was like, oh, wait a minute. No, they are best friends who see each other all the time. They're fucked. They're not this. There's no chemistry to these people. Well, but I mean, they could have a fun like relationship.

witty repartee. Like it could be like a Harry Met Sally kind of a fun, like they could be picking a piss out of each other. But there's that one moment where they're working together on the story. And I was like, this is being set up. Like I hate you and I hate you. And the boss is like, and I'm putting you two together. And like, huh? It's like, no, no, you should be psyched. But here's my question. Besides the fact, why are they starting the big Christmas story on December 13th? That seems like way too short of a lead time for the giant issue. She also says, I need to fall in love by Christmas. Why? That's like,

That's, that's, you think, again, you're 30 years old and you think it's possible to meet and fall in love within 12 days? Nope. That's, that's, that's like a child's thinking. And I also think these movies set up these premises and stakes for women that I've literally never heard one woman, one single woman in my life, and I never felt this way when I was single, think like, oh God, I hope I'm with someone by Christmas. Right.

Well, you've never had the thought like I want to have somebody to kiss on Christmas Eve, that normal thought, like not New Year's Eve. I just want somebody to kiss on Christmas Eve. It's never occurred to me. If anything, it's like I want to be like, I want to be in a food coma on a couch. Like Christmas to me is not like a sexy time. Like Christmas is a time to be in your comfy cozies.

I agree. I agree with that. But I think you're equating love with sexy time. And I will say the idea of spending the holidays alone is sad. Of course. And I don't, I'm not dismissing that. But she also has her dad there. But that's exactly what I was just going to say. She has friends.

She has not only family, but a best friend and many other friends and a support system. She's not, the movie would make sense if it was like she's alone someplace. Nick is her best friend. He comes to visit. They do their tradition. And like, you know, the snowman comes to life. By the way, how?

How the fuck do you make this movie and never reveal to Sarah or Nick that Cole was the snowman all along? That's my issue. The snowman doesn't seem to know that he's a snowman. They don't get that reveal. There's no stakes to the snowman. That's the whole fun of the movie. Nobody suspects that he's the snowman. I said this to June, and June disagreed with me, but I'm going to say it to you here. I believe that Sarah's mom was a snowwoman.

- Okay, so you're saying- - Or something. - You think Sara's dad fucked a snow woman? - Well, okay, because here's the thing. - I don't know. - Okay, well, let's get into that magical scarf. - Go on. - What's the magical scarf then?

It's old. Okay, so this is where I'm kind of confused. Yes, I agree with you because it is the scarf. The scarf is the thing. The snowman comes to life because of the scarf. And again, the father's like, here's the scarf. So that was a scarf that her mother was wearing. Is that a thing that brings it? Was her mother a light post or a lamp post in France? Does this magical scarf bring things to life? I sure hope not.

I think that that's the movie trying to draw a cute and sweet connection between the love that the parents had, which is what Sarah repeatedly in the movie says, I'm looking for the kind of love that you and mom had. And wait, okay, why does the dad wait until she's 30-something to give her the scarf? Why now? Because I'll tell you why. I'll tell you why. Give her the scarf. Because that dad...

She is too attached to that home and that dad. And that dad had been holding that scarf back because that dad wanted her working on that furniture. And that dad wanted, a lot of times what happens with dads is when mom dies, they make the daughter little wifey.

And I think that's what was going on with dad. You know, June, I don't disagree with you, but I also want to talk about something here too. Quaint Paul furniture in that big, beautiful house that they have. Like he freaked out. He's like, you shouldn't have done this. Your company name should be Quaint Paul Podcast. Oh, I mean, I'm going to get into Quaint Paul ready to go. But Quaint Paul says like,

oh, honey, you shouldn't have bought me this stain. It's too expensive. She was like, no, it wasn't, daddy. For Father's Day. For Father's Day, she got him furniture stains. And by the way, it's from Italy. And you're telling me you live in St. Paul, Minneapolis? No. What?

But by the way, by the way, like he seems to have a, for that house, unless the mother died in some sort of freak accident where they won a ton of money, like she was, you know, killed by a toaster fire and Black and Decker like paid them out like $12 million. Like that quaint Paul furniture is doing good because she's not making that much money on that digital fucking scene. Well, he says,

Well, she's working for the magazine and she's also listing his refurbished furniture and making money on it herself. Right. You know, but she's not paying rent there. She's making it. She's a very successful business is all I'm saying is like that quaint Paul furniture is paying the mortgage of that house. I'm just saying it's not a small house. I think they own that house outright. I think from what at this point from what?

From the furniture. From the small town and them living there forever. Yes, from quaint Paul furniture. And I think, Paul, that you and I, because I actually really loved the kitchen in this movie and the kitchen in that house. I loved it, loved it, loved it. But I do think the house was not set up. I think you saw it as this mansion. But I don't think that's the way it was supposed to come across. I think they were supposed to come across as modest houses.

You know, people who are in this sort of old fashioned. It's giant. But the house only makes sense as a big house in a small town. It doesn't make sense as a big house in a big city. It looks like a museum. It does. I agree. And here's my question. I have a couple of questions. Okay. There's places I want to go. We didn't really break down the scarf thing, but I will say that. But I do think the scarf was the magical element that caused Cole to come to life. And then Nick wears the scarf at the end.

When they had their final meet-cute. And it's when she finally sees Nick, sees Nick because he's wearing the red scarf. She sees him as the one that she's supposed to be with or whatever, the way that her dad described seeing the mom. I think that's the connection, the movie. Again, the movie is clumsy. I'm not saying they're doing a good job of that.

Yeah. You know what I mean? I don't, I didn't love this the way I loved. What world do we live in where I'm saying I didn't love snowman as much as a very nutty Christmas. You are looking for, you're saying I need a little bit more Melissa Joan Hart. And I'm going to tell you, this movie didn't do a little bit more comedy chops. And I do think the snowman was good, but I thought the characters, I thought the snowman was good, but also a humorless guy. Give me, I needed a Rizzoli or an Isles in this guy.

I needed characters. Welcome. We need characters. All right. So June and I got to this debate and we just barely started it off screen. And I want to bring it up here. When, when Nick says, I'm happy for you, June says, that's a lie. And I go, that's true. He is happy for her because they are friends, but he's not happy for himself. And I believe that that could be two things can be true.

No, what he says, Paul, and this is where I took a shoe with it. He says to her when he finds out that she's leaving for Paris with Cole, he says, I'm happy for you, but I'm just not happy for me.

And my point was like, well, then you're not happy for her. And that's actually just fine, but you're lying. And Paul, I mean, I do feel like I uncovered something about you because Paul kept on saying, no, no, no, no, no. He is happy for her, but it just hurts him. And...

My point of view is like, well, that's not possible. That's a lie. And that's an okay lie to have to tell yourself or to have to tell someone else. But it's actually not true. Do you think? What do you mean? Can you be happy for someone but also be upset?

Like it's sort of like, hey, I'm so happy. Oh, yes. Yes. I think you can be. Thank you. I think you can be. I think you can be happy for someone because you love them. Yes. And you want them to be happy, even if that means their happiness makes you unhappy. Yes. Unrequited love. If you are, if I'm unrequitedly in love with someone and they love someone else, I want to see you happy. But I've never been unrequited. So I guess I don't know. Wow. You've never had unrequited love?

I guess I have, but not to the degree- You've always gotten everybody you set your eye on? No, no, no, no. That's not true. But I've never had the experience of thinking to myself, I love you so much that I'm happy that you are with someone else that you love. I don't believe that that's-

ever a feeling I have ever had, honestly. And I don't think that's possible. So you would rather them be unhappy, but like, here's my question. I'm not saying I would rather them be unhappy. That's not the equivalency. I mean, I'm just saying, I could not honestly say I'm happy for you if I was not, if it was causing me that much pain.

Wow. Okay. Maybe that makes me a terrible person. Cody, Molly, what do you think? I want to hear Cody. I think if it was my best friend, if it was somebody that I was like super close with, even if I had feelings for them, that I knew they, if I felt like they weren't in love with me,

Right. But they found love. I would be happy for them and I would be heartbroken for myself. Super producer Cody says, super producer Cody says, I'm with June. Producer Molly says, I am not with June. So we are, I guess it comes down to how we are as human beings. What I think is it's a, it's a lovely and actually necessary mechanism of self-preservation because,

And I think that I understand it. And I think it's lovely and important to... When I said I was happy for the actor who got the role in the M. Night movie, Old, I meant it. Now, I wasn't happy for myself.

but I was happy for him because it was a great opportunity. Now I also can say, well, if I was there, I would have made a couple of different choices. But I think if you can't be happy for someone you love to find love that is not with you, then I think you are selfish.

I think you are being selfish. I agree. Selfish. You're saying only me. Right. Only if it works on my level. You're not allowed to have you're not allowed to have happiness on your own terms. Only with me. No, but that's not what I'm saying. I don't think it's that black and white. I'm saying that I would never stop someone that I was in love with from finding or stand in any sort of way.

I would say, go with God. Do what you need to do. I couldn't stand here and say, I'm happy. That is a lie. And that's- I'm happy for you. No, but I'm not happy for you. I'm not happy. I'm not happy for you. I'm not. I'm unhappy for me.

Okay, the t-shirt is, I'm happy for you, I'm happy for me. I'm happy for you, but I'm not happy for me. I'm not. I'm not. I understand the feelings behind it, but I would hope that I could be selfless enough to wish for and be happy for the person I love to find love. I think what you're honestly saying is you're at peace.

That's fine. I'm at peace. I actually don't think I would be at peace. No, I'm not at peace. I'm happy. I would think I would be, I would be a mess. I would be a fucking disaster. I'm not at peace. And how could you say you're happy for them if you're a total mess? Because I am.

I'm happy for them. I'm sad for me. I'm happy for them. I'm sad for me. I'm happy for them. I'm sad for me. That's the shirt. Write it down. But here's the thing. I believe, I believe that you can be an inner turmoil. You can be an inner turmoil, but also know like it was the best thing for them. Like I'm Nick. I'm a fucking dud. Peace.

That's not happy. But I'm not at peace. I'm not at peace with it. Peace, resolve. Yes. Conclusion, that's not happy is active. And it's false. And I think that sometimes we need those false narratives because they make us feel better. They make us feel like we're not selfish. They protect us. But I don't think that that's true. And I think- But you're saying as if there is a truth to it.

And I don't think there is like, I don't feel more than one thing at one time. That's what Molly says. Of course you can. And I think that that's absolutely right. That you can feel like, oh, well, obviously, even though I'm devastated, I don't want them to be with me. If they don't want to be with me, of course not. That again, peace, resolve, go with God, happy. No. Okay. Well, how about this? We know that Nick is an honest guy because all three of us are writers. We've all made money writing.

And when Nick reads her article, baby, yeah, when Nick reads her article, making money and I love it. But here's the thing. Wealth that I've generated, you know, it's just those. I got those word bucks, baby. Jason, if I came up to you and you said, hey, Paul, can you read this script? And I said, yeah. And I read it. And you said, what do you think? And I'd say it's accurate.

How would you feel? It's very accurate. Is that a good? Yeah, I think that's him saying something that is like he's it's a flat response. It's a flat response because he's he's still struggling with every scene. Nick wants to tell her, I love you. And he's basically saying, yes, you've written what happened. You know, those are you've described to the events that have happened.

You know? Right. So, but like. You've like translated this experience. I mean, and that, like that to me seemed like the most, the most, the most cutting line in the whole movie. It's very accurate. It's very. It's sort of like someone going up to you after you've done a play or something and saying like, wow, you learned, you knew all of your lines. Yeah.

Right. That would be incredible. What an incredible... You said all of your lines. I would go to my car and leave. You said all of your lines. No, but that's something that people say. Like, oh, you... Wow, how did you learn? It was amazing to me that you learned all of those lines. It's like, as an actor, that's...

the least of my concerns. I think it's more damning than that. I think it's like, you said all of your lines. Yeah, you did that. I think you did. But when you say to, if someone said to me, wow, you really memorized all your lines, that's the bare minimum. Bare minimum. Then I have failed. Yeah, it's like the people in this movie memorized all their lines. Yeah.

I mean, we would be having a different conversation. I think we would be having a fundamentally different conversation if the casting had allowed for Sarah and Nick to have chemistry. If Sarah and Nick had chemistry, if we were rooting for Sarah and Nick, if we believed in Sarah and Nick,

We wouldn't be having this conversation. The problem is, and I think June specifically what you're reacting to is that they don't seem like soulmates. So it feels like they're settling or it feels like she's being told. And in fact, she is being told at one point in the movie to settle. And the reality is-

their friendship should be represented as something that gives her all of the actual things that she needs in life. While, you know, like in terms of emotional, emotional needs, not external, like, um,

And if they had rapport and chemistry and banter, but that she was still like, but you're in the friend zone. I'm still looking for that guy that makes me feel like I got hit by lightning or whatever. She wants a love story. And if they had set up a relationship for her that looked like love, even if it was friendship love, that she just needed to be shown this is actually...

maybe potentially real love. - All right, I want to do something with you guys. - We would be more on board. - All right, I have the whole article here in front of me right now. Pick a paragraph and I will read you a section of the article. I have one, just pick, from one to 10, I'll read you one of the, one of the, four, okay, great. Many stories are told while sipping on a Christmas mug around the fire. And it's here that we bond close with friends and family, which make the holidays one of the best times of the year.

For years, we've been saying that Christmas has become commercial with too much emphasis on shopping and buying. And it's been a tough year for my family. Whenever my mom looked over at the tree and the scattered presents, she would sigh and say, there won't be as much for Christmas this year. Try not to be disappointed. Like this is a dark article. There's mom, I can't. This is the article?

A look I couldn't understand. In my world, we're receiving outweighed giving by light years. My mom's act of selflessness was incomprehensible. It was a huge act. Tears filled my eyes and I thought in disbelief about how much my mom must love me to give up her Christmas so I could have a few more presents. This is the article they wrote. It seems like it's not covering ice skating or s'mores. No, it seems they did. The snow carving. I mean, it also seems like...

It seems like Nick's whole cartoon life is about creating a cartoon of Sarah, who's a real grump.

Well, I thought because he also does cartoons of all of her breakups. Yeah. You know, he does. Is he making a ziggy but Sarah? Yeah, he's well, he's definitely like, well, again, like he has no he has no point of view on himself. So he really just draws her. So he's not. So for Nick, Nick, until the end of the movie, Nick isn't a character in his own cartoon. Well, he is when he's getting eaten by the snowman.

That's true, I guess. And at the end, he makes the cartoon for her, the cartoon series of cartoons that's about them, where he puts himself in place of Cole. And it's like the end of The Painter and the Thief, the documentary, which is an incredible moment where she's painted herself into the painting. And I cried for like six hours. I need to get a couple of questions from the audience here. I want to ask you one question before we do that, which is simply this. Do you think...

If Hank the snowman is real because we see Cole talking to Hank in the forest, is the shark also real? No. Oh, God. No. What's the logic? Cole doesn't interact with the shark because Cole has a lot of feedback for that shark.

Yeah, or the angel. I think this is, I mean, a very good question. Very good question. He doesn't talk, he talks to a bunch of snowmen. Yes. Right? Well, I just remember one. But he doesn't talk to the, maybe it was just the one. But he seems to not recognize the angel or the shark as like sentient the way he thinks his other-

I, I, this again, I think it's a movie. He's pushing Hank's head together. He's, he's bleeding out. He's bleeding out. It's like, is it war trauma? I don't know. I don't know. Yeah, that's true. It's a great question. And you know, we have to, why does he bring them fish? Why does he bring them fish slop? Uh,

Why was that? Why was that? You seem to understand that I did not know what was going on. Okay. First of all, he's created all these lies, right? That he's from, his parents are from Norway. He grew up in Norway and that's a real Ludwig. Oh, that must've been. Yeah. So he's like, but to me, that's,

That's why I think he's a liar because clearly he never had that unless he has been alive or unless he has been in Moscow Square. And the way I kind of keep thinking about it is like, is he snow or is he water? Because if he's water, then does he evaporate as a snowman and then go back up and then come back down in the Moscow Square? Like what is going on? Jeez. You know, I don't know. And at the end of the movie, when he gets in that Uber, like, does he melt? Yeah.

Well, that's the thing. We never see what he's inside. I wanted closure for Cole. I wanted us to see... Here's what I want. I wanted justice for Cole. The movie should have ended justice for Cole. The movie...

I want Cole in Fast and Furious 10. Boom. Here. Get him in there. I think a movie should have ended with them, right? Right. Kissing with chemistry, them kissing, then looking out the front window and the snowman is back. The snowman is back. Back.

That's the last shot. That's the last shot. Yeah. Oh, then that's Cole. That's Cole. That's Cole. But what was Cole talking to dad about? Cole really talks to dad for a long time. Remember dad is like, remember dad is like, oh, you guys didn't make a snowman. Right. He saw that. And the snowman is that they made the night before has gone. It's turned into Cole. So this is Cole turned back into the snowman. I would have liked a moment where Sarah and Nick look and go,

Right. You need something. You need to understand. And then they go, then they go and they like beat the shit out of it with a baseball bat. And they're like, you motherfucker. I fucked that. I fucked that man. She didn't though. I don't think, but here's my question. Yeah. I don't think Cole had a dick. I do think he had a dick, but no, because I think he only had what was on the snow. I don't understand how that works, but if,

It was a freezing cold dick. It had to be. I mean, I have cold fingers, but I'm not a snowman. She gave the snowman abs, so he had abs. Well, like the snowman didn't have hair. I guess so. The snowman doesn't even wear the shirt that she puts on him. She puts a blue shirt on him and he wears a red shirt. He doesn't have a carrot for a nose. He doesn't have hands. He has stick arms. He doesn't have a cell phone. He has stick arms.

Give me something. All right. Let's go to the crowd. Let's go to the crowd. We have a lot of- Wait, wait. Paul, one more question before we go to the crowd. Hashtag, does he have a dick? I want the chat to be in. He definitely has a dick. All right. Is his dick a carrot? Is possum New York ass? No, they would have put it there. Right. So if it's not there, it's nothing. Okay, but- I think they would have had to have put a carrot where the dick is for him to have had a human dick. June, I didn't mean to cut you off. What were you saying? Well, Manil, I was going to say, my question, there's so many frames in this home of-

and pictures in his home, in the bank vault, I'm sorry, in Sarah's home in the bank vault of them as little kids with snowmen. Did they take them out for holidays though? Is that like a thing like we take out the Christmas dolls for holidays? Did they take out the special snow portraits for holidays? Or are they up all year round? I think that's just, their lives are so sad that these are the stories, these are the pictures of their life.

is that they take a selfie every year with a representation of a giant ass iPad, not a phone of a rep. Yes. A representation of her idealized man. And she puts it as a screensaver. Oh God. There's a lot of, uh, in the chat, a lot of people are saying, yes, he has a dick. All right. Some more questions from the chat. Let's see what else we have here. Uh,

All right, next question from the chat is this. Natalie asks, do the star eyes mean he's a spirit or an alien or a ghost from space inhabiting a snowman? Or is that magic from the universe bringing him to life? I.e., is he possessed or activated? Yes, this is a question. Is he a demon? We don't know. Thank you, Natalie. We don't know.

what he is. They don't examine the magic of it at all, which is, I think, foolish. The way that like a nutty Christmas and other things. We need a line. A line. Right, Jack Frost? Yes. That was the other one? Jack Frost, I'd rather have no dad than snow dad. Or I'd rather have a snow dad than no dad. Snow dad than no dad, yeah. But the other thing is like when she finds out from her dad that their snowman has disappeared overnight and she's like so angry and she's running out

And she assumes like kids have fucked with it. We never get to see what was left there. Like we never get to see the remnants of the original snowman. Cause he's just at the door. Cole is at the door. What do you think? With the scarf, with the scarf that they put on. Which takes away the magical part of it. Because like, in my mind, he should have been wearing that scarf the whole movie. So he like, that like the, again, like we don't know what the magic is. We were tracking a lot of different scarves.

I mean, by the way, that guy never wears a jacket. He must have been a freezing cold actor. God bless the actor. What's his name? His name is Jesse Hutch. He's working his ass off. He's making choices. He's working his ass off to give Cole some kind of a vibe, which he has, which I very much appreciated. At one point, he just shouted out, I love 15 degrees. And he made it work. And I laughed out loud.

Out loud when he's fighting. But what I couldn't figure out is how does he have a cell phone? Or how is it? By the way, how does he? I keep on going back to it. How does he have a cell phone? How does he understand how anything works? How is he calling an Uber? How is he getting tickets to Paris? How does he speak? How is he making a look? And that's a string you can't really. Yeah. Yeah.

Molly asks, how do you have a passport? Next question from the audience. What do we got here? Maddie the Cat asks, Sarah, I don't want romance. I want love. Okay. Sarah says, I don't want romance. I want love. What does that mean? Final takeaway, that romance and love are mutually exclusive. What does that mean? I don't want romance. What does that mean? I don't want romance. I want love. I think what she's saying is,

It's inside of what the father is saying to her, where he's like, yes, when I saw your mother in the red scarf, it was like a lightning bolt hit me. But then when that faded, real love kind of took over. And what she was saying is, I'm ready for real love, not the swept off my feet, blah, blah, blah. Talk about two things are possible. Two things can be true at one time.

Like this movie is setting up a world in which you can't have both, right?

That's the problem with it. It's like, it's this, the moral of this story, if it's a Hallmark movie or ABC family movie, I don't know what kind of movie it is, is saying to the audience, hey, look, I know you want to travel. I know you want to like have a better life. I know you want to move out of your small town, get out of the house with your dad. I know you want your own place. Well, the message is, the message is your life is enough. You have everything.

everything you need. I love it. Even if it's not true. Don't aspire to more. Right. Don't aspire to more. Don't dream. Don't dream is the answer. And here you go. This is a question for people. Or follow through on your dream. I would have loved her to go to Paris. Why couldn't she go to Paris for a week?

What if, like, what if Cole would have said, like, when they broke up there and Cole went over to Nick and said, here's tickets to Paris, take her. That would have been a better ending to me too. Listen, I wish we had that ending. To me, I don't care how great Nick is. I don't care what she's realizing. I cannot get on board with this woman not going to Paris.

That's insane for seven days. Like with a friend of yours, if a friend of yours was like 48 hours ago, a stranger showed up on my doorstep. It's a lunch in a carriage where he did not eat. He tried to he tried to sell my home and has now invited me to Paris. Should I go?

Yeah. Also, I'm in love with him. Yes, go. No. Okay. June, you would do that. You are advising this person to go. This person's, Cole presents as a murderer. Yes. He has no family. He has no family, no background. She can get nothing. Paris, I would trust. He's un-Google-able. You can't Google Cole. Did you ever do that, June? I want to know. Did you ever do that? Did someone at your bar come up to you and say, let's go to Paris and would you just jump in? No, no.

And I wish that had happened to me. If someone had come up to me who I was attracted to, in love with, and said, let's go to Paris together for seven days...

I have a ticket. It's booked. There's no way I, I wouldn't have gone. And I did not. And I cannot get on board with her not going, even if she wants to come back and explore what's going on over here. Like great. You never had a snow France. You never had a snow France. You never had a snowman. I never had a snowman. Um,

All right, let's get another question. This one actually comes with a video clip. So let's take a look at this. Lucky the Pizza Dog asks, what was the deal with Sarah's boss? Was she an alien attempting to replicate human interaction? Let's take a look at this clip of the boss. Here we go. I love it. You do? Oh yeah, it's perfect. Okay, so what exactly is perfect about it? Young love, a carriage ride, a staple of downtown St. Paul. I mean, that is your story idea, right?

exploring the traditional, fun, romantic things young couples can do in the Twin Cities at Christmastime. I mean, obviously, that's what we were going for. Okay, so watching that clip, I realize she's making eye contact with no one. I also noticed that for the decoration on the table, it's like a vase with candy canes in it. But that actually was really unnerving to watch that close. She's not looking at either one of them. And she also feels like she might be magic. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, wow. You think she's magic? She seems unwell. The thing that I love about all of these movies and Lifetime Christmas movies in general is that there's not one frame, not a one, where you don't see somewhere in the frame a Christmas person.

Ornament, a garland, a something. They're everywhere. Even when they're in the woods. I know, but it's like even when they were building snow creatures, there were the trees had red bows on them. Like they, you have to know. The woods are decorated in Twin Cities.

By the way, Devin, our amazing, uh, our amazing Devin, uh, says that is the worst Devin who lived in Minnesota, worst attempt at a Minnesota accent I've ever heard. So this is something coming from where you can speak to truth, the power here. Uh,

I would have loved for there to have been more life for the rest of the townspeople, the other people that they worked for, the dad and the old man that he works with. I would have loved for a, because this movie felt so thin. I would have loved for there to have been depth by using some of these other characters. As a result, having a B or a C story would have been really interesting. Yeah, sure. And would have made the movie a lot more interesting.

Yeah. As it was, it was, I enjoyed watching it, don't get me wrong. Can you imagine what this would have been like, though, in the hands of one of the great, you know, one of the great actresses of our time, Melissa Joan Hart? I mean, if Mario Lopez was a snowman, give me that. Give me a Hudgens. I wouldn't recast the snowman. I wouldn't recast him for Mario Lopez. That's fine. By the way, no.

Yeah. I mean, Jesse Hutch does a great job, but I think Mario Lopez as Nick would have been great too. We want a little bit of competition. I think that, you know. That's interesting. Hudgens in this role would be great. I think Hudgens should have a snowman. Would have knocked it out of the park. Would have knocked it out of the park. Here's the thing I'm going to tell you though. You think that this is a low budget movie. This movie cost $140 million. Emma Roberts. Put Emma Roberts in this. Paul, that's a lie. What did you...

Wait, what did you just say? The movie cost $140 million. The actors took a large chunk of the pay. All right, let's, let's, let's, the actors were doing the best they could. They were simply not quite, and the chemistry wasn't there, you know, and you really did need it. They should have done it. I,

I would have loved it if Nick fell in love with Elk Jerky Lady. I thought we were going somewhere. They were kind of finding their bond. I wanted more life for Elk. So Elk Jerky Lady is like the Stars Hollow, you know, like one of the characters, the Kurt in Stars Hollow. Like give me, give. You know why they could never be together though, Jason? Because he's too boring? Both redheads.

Oh, and they cancel each other out? June did say to me, she whispered in the middle of the movie, she said, wait, what? Tell her what you said there. Have you ever seen two redheads together? It's unheard of. It's unheard of. Wow. The chat is, by the way, shipping Isabelle and Nick. They like Isabelle and Nick. I'd love to, but we know they could never work. You know, they could never work. Oh, that is...

That is a shocking claim. So he's just, when I said to Paul we were watching it, I was like, if you look closely at Nick, like he's just on the verge of being a redhead. Like he's like right on the edge, you know, in certain lighting, in certain rooms. Like in my lighting right now, he'd be a redhead. In Paul's, he probably wouldn't be. But he is a redhead. Yeah.

you know, at the end of the day. And so they wouldn't, you know, they couldn't. I'm not disagreeing. I'm not trying to, I'm not disagreeing vis-a-vis the redheads. Have you ever seen a movie with two redheads falling in love? There is, I mean, I will say Mr. and Mrs. Weasley are both redheads. They are, they are the personification. They are the personification of true love and have produced a series of redheaded children. Now listen,

You know, did we watch them fall in love? No. Would I watch a movie in which they do fall in love? Yes. Do I want to watch them fuck? Absolutely.

Sure, but we just haven't seen it. Clearly, we have an opinion about a lot of things, including redheads and gingers. But there are people out there with a different opinion about this movie. It is now time for Second Opinions. And here are some Second Opinion themes that were sent in by our listeners. Take a look. Second Opinions that are found on Amazon. This movie was shit, but they say it's legit. So let's hear them, Tall John.

A great one. All right. That was Pam Rose. Let's hear from Tom McWaters. I know you think this movie sucks. I couldn't give a thousand fucks. So take it with a grain of gin. Here's my second opinion. Second opinion.

I love. Yeah, great. I love Tom McWatters. I love that instrumentation. I love Pam Rose. Yeah. They are great. Tom does a bunch of songs for the show. Pam's puppet work there was great. We'll end with Lacey, also from the Discord. Here's Lacey's song.

There was a snowman who turned into a real boy. He was scared of carrots and he just couldn't bear it to wear clothes in front of the fire. He likes buttons, he likes winter coals, his name no lie.

Born in the snow and the children know who calls everyone little guy. Amazing. That was Lacey. Two trees. Two trees. June, you're a big fan of two trees. You wanted a tree in the bedroom, a tree in the living room. Yep.

Jason, do you have any trees in your house? I have a tree. I have a tree in the living room. I just have a single tree. Do you put lights? Do you light lights and decorations or just lights? Well, here's what I'll say. Normally, I would have a real tree with lights and ornaments. But because of pandemic times...

Last year, I got a fake tree that has lights. And so I've been using that last year in this year. So yes, lights and ornaments. But this one happens to be fake, which I don't love. Okay. I will say this. There are...

119 total reviews of this movie. 60% are five-star. 3% are one-star. So people love this movie. I only have three reviews. I'll read them very quickly. From Retired Soldier Sailor, they write, like I said, I buy a lot of Christmas movies. I enjoyed the heck out of this one. Buy it. You'll like it. Nuff said. Five stars.

And the title is I buy a lot of Christmas movies, but this one is different. This one is from Tom FB. Tom FB writes this too close to people to realize you love them. Five stars, no title. That was a little, wow. I feel like that one emotionally connected. And finally from butterfly mom, 54 says,

I love this movie. I love snowmen. I collect them. I love snowmen. However, I pass this movie over a few times. The trailer did not appeal to me, but...

I decided to give it a go. It was the best $3.99 I have spent in a long time. The beginning was a little slow and silly, but all of a sudden, the movie took an unexpected turn, and the results were hilarious to me. I kept on laughing, and I love Jesse Hutch in this movie. He is really funny. If you watch it, you will know why I love this movie and why I mentioned that I love Snowmen. I

I see this as a good movie for a guy and a girlfriend to watch or two females. So this is either a guy-girl movie or a guy-guy movie. This is definitely like seeing Jesse in one very revealing scene. Not going to give it away. What I did not like, and I tried, and it tried my patience.

was the way that that male friend was so jealous. That girlfriend was so clueless and the boss was so weird, but kind of funny. The part with Jesse Hutch were my favorite. So funny and so unexpected. I do not see this as a family movie as it is an adult themed, but clean movie.

I just don't see young ones being interested. Maybe a young husband and a wife, older couples would probably roll their eyes. I do not see this as a romance movie as much as a study in relationships. Good graphic art scenes too. Enjoy five stars. And the review is titled a fun frosty story. But now there's one review that I thought was actually really interesting. And it is from the UK.

And it is by Jessica Sinclair. Take a look. What?

Oh boy. Here we go. Jessica. I'm so sorry that I can't be with you tonight. I love watching Christmas movies with you guys. So this is breaking my heart. Um, Paul did send me the trailer of snowman's and asked for my thoughts. Now I don't know the full plot of the movie, but that has never stopped me weighing in in the past. Um, just my main takeaway is the moment I saw that snowman, um,

I knew this was going to be a movie about a woman who wants to fuck an inanimate object.

And listen, I'm as sex positive as the next gal, but you show me a human being who gets off on a snowman. That's just, it doesn't exist because the entire movie I'm concerned with what's going on downstairs was the same problem I had with that nutcracker movie. When we were talking about, is it a smooth? Yes. Here I'm like, is it made of ice? Is it, is,

I just, these are the things that I can't let go. A couple other things, just, you know, again, on the superficial side, the actor who plays Cole, who is forced to take his shirt off at a bonfire, which I initially thought was maybe he had like a fever, you know, that was causing him to be delirious.

He violates, again, I hate to say this, but what I like to call the Mario Lopez rule that we set out in that Melissa Joan Hart movie where everybody had the exploding diarrhea during filming. And that is, I want my actors in my Hallmark films to have no hair or all the hair in the world.

He had a kind of smattering and it looked, you know, like they trimmed it up and I appreciated that, but that is violating a key rule for me. I want, and you know what? Honestly, I want my men hairless. Okay. I do in those movies. I want them to have no hair at all. Um, one last thing to say, I'm a woman who loves the olden days. Um, and I, I've seen enough, um,

carriage rides now in these movies to know that I don't want that. And I certainly don't want someone picking me up at work in a horse-drawn carriage. It's a red flag. It's just there's so many red flags in this movie. So

Anyway, I'm sure there's much more disturbing things in this film and I can't wait to listen. And listen, for all of you out there who would fuck a snowman, please let me know. I'd love to have my mind opened about it. And I'm sending all my love. Bye.

There she is. The queen of Christmas. She's just too much. She is just too much. The greatest. And only watching the trailer nailed so many things. I didn't drill down on the hair on his chest, but I think she's right. It wasn't... I think for Hallmark, it's easier for us gals to just have a more sort of Ken doll-like experience and keep the whole thing sanitized. Very true.

These, yeah, sanitized is right. These Hallmark and Lifetime and like the kind, these, this style of, but I, one of the notes I made was like, I really, and maybe this is just like a different type of a movie. I want this movie to have like sex, not like a sex scene. Yeah. But I want to believe, I want-

I want, exactly. I want to believe that Sarah and Cole, as they're falling in love, that, that attraction and physical demonstrations of that love are part of it. Like, I'm not going to go to Paris with someone if I've, if I don't know if we are good kissing partners. If we are, if, if, if I don't want to get to Paris and be like, oh,

he's like does that thing where he jams his tongue in my mouth the whole time or whatever like if I'm Sarah I'm like let me yeah let me let me figure this out he seems to be cold-blooded so let me figure out if I can if we have sexual chemistry I would have liked the last line of the movie would have been like and when we fucked it was weird

Yeah. Like, but let me know. Or Nick is like, do you think that, wait, do you think that Cole was the snowman? And she's like, well, his dick was an icicle. So, or he did come freezing cold slush. I don't know. Yes.

I mean, I think we unpacked a lot here. There's no mythology to break apart because we don't know if coal could exist in this world. Jason's saying that coal never was supposed to exist in this world. I mean,

I mean, there's so much. I want to just talk to you about the writer of this movie. Blaine Shepeta writes two types of movies, according to our research guru, Nate Kiley, who did the Lord's work in finding research on this movie that has 25% of Rotten Tomatoes. He says that Blaine writes two movies, movies that are called Dangerous Lessons, You May Now Kill the Bride, Nanny Surveillance.

and the deadly assistant. And then movies like last Vermont Christmas, which,

The Christmas Pact. The Perfect Christmas Present. Always and Forever Christmas. And then the Jingle Bell Princess. So he's going between hardcore, most likely to murder, Jingle Bell Princess. So he's going back and forth. He just switches off between a murder film and a Christmas film every year. And that's kind of... That is kind of thing. And the tagline of this movie... I'll say it. We say it every year. Well, somebody just...

have the courage you cowards they have they have tried and they have tried to put us in one of they have tried they have tried i i want to be honest i just it just hasn't gotten to me it hasn't gotten to you we we were asked okay then we were asked to attach ourselves uh to a film before we want we want the film to be picked up we will be in like we can't go and pitch this thing we have to like hallmark's got to come to us and say like

You got a green light. Here's the keys. And the problem is like, it probably can't be Hallmark because it's going to have to have nudity. I mean, you have to. And hair.

Yes. And hair and nudity, all of which, all of which is me to be clear, all of which is why I am bringing the hair rider. Yeah. Where it's like, you're going to see all the hair and all the nudity. I want to, I want to go. I want to end. You will have no, I want to play. I want to play the snowman that comes to life. And I want to show you this snowman has a dick.

If you are wondering, here it is. HBO Max, Snowman's movie. I want to just end on this one question because I think this is a great way to round robin the end here because I think we covered a lot of stuff here from Brandon. Can you pop up Brandon's question on screen? Brandon asks, who's the most redeeming character in this movie and why is it Herb?

Herb is the father's assistant. Is that right? I believe it is. Who? I mean, I agree. I loved that character. The deaf man who worked or a hard of hearing man. The guy who was just kind of like sweeping or doing whatever in the background of the wood shop. I loved that. I just, I enjoyed and that they were like, he was like, I can't let him go or something like that. I don't know. I was obsessed with that guy. Yes. I think that Herb is the most. All the side characters were the most interesting people in the movie.

Truly. I want to believe that the jerky was something that that actress came up with. And they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Keep that. Keep that. Like she made a choice and they, they put it in. I mean, she was really great. I liked her so much. This is a movie. If this, if I'm going to continue to compare it to Gilmore girls, it's a movie in which everybody's Dean. All right. Well, this is great. Would you recommend this movie? Jason June? What do you think? Sure. I mean, it's something to honestly, it's something to be seen. It's something to behold. Um,

You know, and that's all I'll say about that. I did enjoy watching this movie very, very much. And there are a couple of really funny moments, like when he's pretending to be a snowman. And not pretending, when he is being himself and falls back on his instincts. It's really quite funny. The movie doesn't, of course, like amount to anything, but there's some wild stuff in here. And I enjoyed the hell out of it.

Do you have Jason? I agree. I agree with June. I feel very similarly. While not as fun, perhaps, as some of the other, like we've been saying, a very nutty Christmas or some of the other holiday in handcuffs, those I think were better fun.

Better iterations of this kind of a movie. This is a little bit worse, but I still, I had a blast. I think it's like for the sake of the podcast, absolutely watch it. But there are other Christmas movies that I suspect might be a little bit more fun. Let me posit this. I don't disagree with what either of you have said. I will say this.

I feel like this movie is more of a drama than it is a comedy. The other movies, like, understand they're being fun. And I don't think that this movie had the same sense of playfulness. I think it was played a little bit too straight. That's my point of view. I enjoyed it, but I think that that's what was missing from it. Like, it didn't seem fun. And I think, here's what I'll say, to amend my point is, if I had just watched this movie...

and not gotten to have this conversation, or if I'm somebody in the audience to have listened to this conversation, if I just turned it on and watch the movie, I think I would be disappointed. I will tell you this much. Without any. Yes. June and I have a movie that we have planned for next Christmas already. Cause we stumbled upon it, uh, because our child just selected it, uh, over Thanksgiving. And I feel like, uh,

These movies are hard for us to do. You mean? A hard needle to thread, but you're right. Like it is, it is not as insane as it should be, nor as funny as it should be, but yet it is interesting because it's confounding. Like it's like, and I think that that like it's,

All these movies always play it safe so that they can just be like family friendly, safe, safe, safe, nothing sexual, nothing dirty, not even any like intimations of stuff, nothing. I would, you know, it's, I don't know. Again, I wished I was missing Melissa Joan Hart. I was missing those-

I wish I found myself being elated when elk jerky would come on or when the boss would be on or when other characters were there to kind of enliven what was otherwise. Yeah. What was a coal? I thought coal, coal's doing good stuff, you know? But by the way, she also didn't have chemistry with coal.

Agreed. No, I mean, it was Cole, yeah. Cole was doing something. And they're all working hard. They're all working their asses off in the constructs of, in the confines of the rules of the movie, which is tough. You know, like it's not a lot. There's like, like we said, I think there's six or seven speaking roles. There's no extras. There's very little happening in this movie to work with. I'm just saying as an actor. Yes. I think there's very little happening. Everyone's making their own choices. Everyone's doing their own thing. And now, would it surprise you that Lars Van Trier directed this?

Amazing. It would. It's a dogma. It adheres to the Dogma 95 rule. I will say this. June, we talk about joking around about being a Christmas movie. June, you are in a Christmas movie and a very good Christmas movie. And it's on HBO Max right now. And if you've not seen it, I just want to promote it and just say that June's fantastic. And the movie is really, really, really good. So you've done it. You've done it before any of us in getting a Christmas film.

I have gotten in a Christmas film and I will say it is a great movie. It's a great Christmas movie. It's called 8-Bit Christmas. It's on HBO Max and you can stream it now and watch it over the holidays. Neil Patrick Harris. Neil Patrick Harris, Steve Zahn. David Cross. David Cross is in it and it's just...

Funny, warm, and just delivers on everything you want from it. And our children have watched it at least 30 times, like at least a minimum of 30 times.

That's great. I just watched the trailer for it and it also had like real, it felt like real nostalgia vibes. It felt like a kind of Christmas movie that like we grew up. It's very much like what I think the Christmas story was to our parents, like reminiscing about like the 50s. This feels like that same idea. I'm so excited to watch it to kind of,

wash away snowman. It'll be a great chaser. Yes, exactly. Jason, what do you want to talk about? Oh, nothing really. You know, if you're not watching Star Trek Prodigy, watch it. It's a wonderful animated Star Trek show. So good. And you're great in that show, Jason. Oh, thanks so much. And that's about it. You know, everybody, you know, it's that time of year. So if you find yourself in the position where you can

Give money. There's a lot of great deserving places that need those donations right now. So get to work. I'll mention one of those. Feeding America is one of those great organizations. I actually work with them today. They do a great job for people who are food insecure and they are just an amazing organization that has throughout this entire pandemic been

uh, seen their numbers rise to such a high level and have stepped up and met that challenge and continue to meet that challenge. Uh, and it's all through the generosity of so many people, uh, giving money and volunteering their time. And, uh, to work with them today was a really amazing, uh, opportunity. I will say, uh, also, um, uh,

Not that it's a, well, I'll just plug it because why not? Pace Magazine released their 20 favorite comedies of the year. And this movie I did over the year called Happily was on that. And I think it was a nice reminder that if you have not seen Happily, it's a streaming. It's, it defies kind of a definition. It's a romance. It's a thriller. It's a horror movie. And it's a friends hanging out movie. It's all, all in one kind of a weird Lynchian thriller kind of thing. Oh, and Paul,

Plugging one other thing. I know these plugs are going long, but I just wanted to invite our listeners because so many of the How Did This Get Made listeners came to our Jane Club virtual summit last year. And we are, we've just announced our third virtual summit. It's going to be in 2022 on January 22nd. It's called New Year, New Jane. It's a time to kind of

set some new year's resolutions intentions within community it's a really really incredible day of writing reflecting we have different topics and it's just absolutely restorative and wonderful so we just put the tickets on our website if you head to janeclub.com and click on special events um and then head to new year new jane the tickets are now available

I love all this. Thank you guys for listening. Our month of Christmas continues on Christmas Eve. We'll be releasing the last episode of this podcast, which is the episode that Jessica Sinclair forgot to record. So we have figured out our brilliant engineer, Devin, has pieced together something that sounds amazing.

About right. It may not be perfect, but it sounds about right. But that's our Christmas gift there. It's the night before Christmas, and that will be coming out Christmas Eve. TeePublic right now. If you go to teepublic.com, you can get 30% off how to just get made shirts. A big, big thank you to our producer, Cody Fisher, our sound engineer, Devin Bryant, and of course, our producer, Molly Reynolds. All three of them working late on a Friday night. We appreciate you. But I also want to give a shout out to our special...

amazing person who runs the whole show here, Kayla Miller, who is doing shit in the chat, pulling up video clips,

activating everything. Kayla, thank you so much for making the show run incredibly flawlessly. And a huge thank you to our research guru. That is Nick Kiley, our producer, Avril Halle, for picking this film and all the films we do in this podcast. You can continue this conversation on our Discord. There's a chat going on right now, discord.gg slash hdtgm. You can get in there and continue the party there. You can also go over to my Discord where I think there's a little bit of a chat going on over there too. That's discord.gg slash paulshear.

Chats are happening. So there's an after party. If you want to go there, enjoy it. We'll be doing a sorted live show. So just check out HDTGM.com for all the tickets and details on that. A big thank you to the people who do all of our amazing art. I'm talking about the ghost of Craig T. Nelson on Instagram, Zach McAleese, and also Kyle Waldron, who you see all of his art on our Facebook and Instagram pages.

If you like the show, rate and review it as always. But just thank you for showing up. Thank you for spending your time with us. Thank you for spending your money here with us. I know that that's tight too. So we appreciate you. We will continue to be back. And I hope you all have your perfect snowmance. I'm just gonna be here. Here I go.

Hi guys, Amy Nicholson from unspooled here and the national sales event is on at your Toyota dealer making now the perfect time to get a great deal on a dependable new truck, like a rugged half ton Tundra combining raw capability with premium comfort and advanced tech to fuel your wildest adventures or check out the fully redesigned Tacoma delivering trail dominating power and captivating style. The new Tacoma was born to make your off-roading dreams come true.

Check out more national sales event deals when you visit buyatoyota.com. Toyota, let's go places. Every sandwich has bread. Every burger has a bun. But these warm, golden, smooth steamed buns? These are special. Reserved for the very best. The Filet-O-Fish and you. You can have them too.

Ba-da-ba-ba-ba.