New York Ninja LIVE!
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How Did This Get Made is going to be in Chicago and Minneapolis, Minnesota this week. That's right. Come check us out. Go to hdtgm.com to find out the four movies, two nights in each spot. It is going to be great. We're almost sold out in both places, but there are still seats available and you're not going to want to miss it. I don't even know what the outlying cities are, but get there. Bend, not bend,

I don't know, South Bend? Anyway, get there any which way you can. Go to hdtgm.com and you'll find out the movies and how to get tickets. We'll see you out on the road. It's 1984 and New York is overrun by plutonium killers, henchmen who chew on their ponytails, shirtless marsh fishing in Speedos, and lots of slow karate. We saw New York Ninja, so you know what that means.

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Hello people of Earth and hello people of Central Jersey! We are live at the Count Basie Theater in Red Bank for a movie that was made for New Jersey. New York Ninja. Let me tell you a little bit about New York Ninja. New York Ninja is a movie that was shot in 1984 but came out in 2021.

It is about a man whose wife is killed on the day she finds out she's pregnant. And then he goes on to find the killers, I think, maybe, and stop an international prostitution ring that may or may not be just models in the city. Again, I'm not quite sure of the plot.

I know New York is prominent, I know ninjas are prominent, and I know there's a New York ninja, but the rest is all up in the air. Here to break it down for you even more are my two co-hosts. Please welcome to the stage, Mr. Jason Manzoukas! What's up, jerks? Central Jersey? Oh, shit! Oh, shit! That's right!

New York Ninja, a movie that makes total sense, that I just found out was released in 2021. What are you talking about? That blew my entire mind back there. This movie, like The Great Miami Connection, was found many years later. Give it up for The Miami Connection. Come on. It was found many years later without the soundtrack.

So a director came in and decided to put it together without knowing what the script was. Wait a minute, for this movie? Yes. Wait a minute. Okay, we gotta, before you even get into this, get June out here, let's do this. Here she is. June! Diane! Raphael! I had to come out. What? What?

What are you saying, Paul, with your words? You're saying that someone found this movie without sound? Is that what I heard? Wait, are we doing all standing? Because I'll stand. I'll do this show on my feet. The first ever standing show. First of all, June, how are you? Okay. How are you, Paul? I'm fine. Thank you for asking. Yes, this movie was found. Found. Found.

So this is truly, when they say it's found footage, this movie is found footage, I'm not ready to sit yet. I'm not either. I feel unsettled. Yeah, I need to be on my toes. I'm just picturing someone coming across this at a yard sale and being like, I don't know, I'll throw dialogue on this. That's what I'm saying. Okay, so I will tell you a little bit more. We're going to continue standing for those of you who are listening. You're out of the light now, though. You're in the dark. All right.

So, abandoned footage from 1984 was acquired. Abandoned? Abandoned. Now I feel bad for the movie. So someone adopted this movie? Just like that little orphan. It found its forever cinema?

Just like the little orphan in the film, someone rescued and went fishing with it to make it whole again. I thought for sure this was just, because obviously the whole thing is 80-yard looped, the entire thing. I thought for sure it was just recorded without sound for expense reasons. Do you know what I thought, actually? So, I know we have to sit down at some point. I'm just not ready to. We're on our feet for you, New Jersey! For you, balcony! Thank you!

So I actually thought at one point, so our main character, whoever that person is, the New York Ninja, yes, the New York Ninja himself, it appeared to me at one point that he is the sound person, the sound technician for the New York, like, Eyewitness News News. So then I thought, wow, was that actor playing a sound person and also the movie sound person? Yeah.

Wow. And so now there's no sound. I would love that. But it sounds like even more bizarre. Go ahead. Well, I can give you a couple details. That actor, John Liu, who is playing John Liu, an employee of the New York City television station, wrote and directed this film. But does not do the voice of John Liu.

John Liu. That is done by Don the Dragon Wilson. The reason why the end credits only have as the voice of is because they can't find the actual actors. Wait, the actors who were in the movie? Yes, all the credits are... Because they've all been disappeared? What happened? What happened?

This, I think 1984 to now, people may have passed on. Everyone from '84? There are children in this movie! The I heart New York Ninja Kids are RIP?

And by the way, if they are, if the entire cast of New York Ninja is dead by 2021 or whenever you say this, then like, let's start an investigation. That's a documentary. Let's absolutely appoint a special counsel. Something happened. The very first How Did This Get Made docuseries where we investigate the suspicious deaths of everyone in this movie. Now, I will also say that

At all of their grave sites, there were traces of plutonium. Oh, from the plutonium killer? Yes. No, so here's the thing. The original footage was in film reels. It ran about six to eight hours in length. Thank God. And we're going to watch it right now. Like... And it included no actor credits, so they don't know who a lot of these actors are. So that's why they're... What are you saying? What? What?

I'll give you a couple details. The abandoned footage was eventually acquired by... I love that you keep using the word abandoned. As if it was found on the side of the road. I know. Here's what I want to know. Because what I think might have happened is somebody just never cut it together. That doesn't mean it was abandoned. No. No, it was left in a cardboard box at a fire station.

If you remember, Miami Connection was found on eBay. Now some of us are sitting down. Some of us are going to stand up. No, that's fine. The rest of the night, we're going to be up and down. I can tell. All right. So when the...

abandoned, left alone footage, whatever you want to call it, was found. There was no audio, storyboards, or scripts for the film. It was reconstructed by a new director called Curtis M. Spieler. The dub dialogue was recorded by new actors. And what he likes to say is he suspects, the director suspects, that Lou may have been unable to complete the film before production shut down because

It doesn't feel like it was finished. Really? The eight-hour cut. No.

They wanted to maybe shoot some new scenes, but he said no. He insisted on only using the original footage, claiming, "If my job had been to be an editor in 1984, what would I have done? And I was very aware of trying to maintain what I thought the intended spirit or tone of the production was. I knew there was a fair amount of intentional or unintentional humor to the movie, but I tried to take the project seriously and respectfully to the original source material."

And he would watch the actor's lips and would try to dub to it. And only when he couldn't read the original dialogue, then he would rewrite lines.

Wow! That is... Now I'm like, is this the best movie we've ever watched? I was just going to say, that makes me love this movie even more. And spoiler alert, I loved this movie. I did too. It's a great movie. I'll give you a couple more details. Keep in mind, just for one brief moment, if you will, Paul, keep in mind, yesterday we watched Jonathan Livingston's Seagull. Yeah. Yeah.

At which point I tried to drown myself in the Hudson. So this was a, I took so few notes for that show last night and I took so many notes. I have five pages. I basically transcribed the whole movie just because I was like, I can't believe this is happening. I can't wait. Plutonium killer, gigantic boobs. What is this movie?

Here are the details that we know from some of the surviving crew members. The crew members are dead too? And also, I don't love that you're using surviving as if everybody who worked on this movie, as if this movie to work on it was as if it's The Ring. Oh. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's that, Jerz? He said because of the plutonium. Maybe they actually had real plutonium on set.

I would love that. Wait, do we know? Okay, sorry, go ahead. Well, I'll tell you a couple things. So the film special effects artist, Carl Moreno, said we had zero resources. He estimates the special effects budget was $100. Wow. Most of which he spent on the plutonium killer's melting face.

Not all. Again. Not 85 bucks. Then this movie is the best movie we've all ever seen. Yes. They did a great job. I'm sorry. So are you saying that the director who found the abandoned footage, the orphan footage, that that director never contacted the star and writer of the movie? I believe that John Liu, and someone can correct me if I'm wrong, an actor in 20 karate films from Taiwan and Spain is passed. No. Oh.

Okay. There we go. I suspected. Because what? He lives on a river. Why do you know that he lives on a river? He lives on a river in Vietnam. I was there. I had a great time with him. Just in case you didn't hear it, a balcony monster revealed that John Liu is not dead. He lives on a river. Let's be clear. Not down by a river. Yeah.

Like Chris Farley's famous character. Let's be clear, that is deeply suspect information simply because it came from a Jersey balcony. So, I don't know why... Most everybody up there is shirtless with a 40 tape to their hand. So, I mean, that's what we're working with. So he was alive when the footage was adopted. Yeah.

And so he just didn't have anything. I guess he was on the river and they couldn't contact him. I don't know Vietnam River specifics. I'm sure that people in the last Looks episode will kind of tell us all the details that we want to know about John Liu. But, Poe, I know you already said this, but will you repeat it just because I've forgotten. What year was the abandoned movie discovered? That's when it was shot. Was it also discovered then? No.

Jersey, get it together. 84, I know. Filming began. 40s tape to both hands.

Filming began in late 1984, and the film was released by Vinegar Syndrome in 2021. So I imagine at one point, this was pulled out of the archives somewhere because there were ads for this film in a trade magazine in 1984. It was shelved after 21st Century Distribution Corporation went bankrupt and sold its assets. So somewhere for a long time, there were ads.

Eight hours of footage sitting on a shelf. Someone found it. I wish we had access to all that footage. Well, I will tell you that the one thing they were able to find was the rap song originally recorded for the film. And that actually plays over the end credits. The rest of the music was from the Detroit band Voyager 3, who lists their inspiration for

as vintage horror, action, and sci-fi films like John Carpenter, which makes them a perfect fit for this. So that's, you know, so this is a very, this is a labor of love. And I will say, as much as I loved it, knowing that it had no end, and knowing that new dialogue is recorded, it doesn't attempt to make any sense.

So much so that I found myself rewinding and going, wait, did I hear that? Because the opening scene, we meet John Liu who bumps into his wife on the street. The whole movie, the whole movie is stolen exterior shots.

They don't have any locations. They don't have any interiors. When you're watching, people watch the camera in every shot when there's another person. The scene where all the... One of the scenes where one of the street gangs attacks two women and there is just absolutely a melee of chaotic energy in the middle of the day. In the background of the scene, a woman is putting her laundry into her car.

When John Lou's wife

Nita? Yes, when she is getting her throat slashed, a woman walks up from the subway like... But I actually found that to make New York way more scary. Yes. Because it seemed like it was like 7 a.m. on a Wednesday morning, and this woman was like... Listen, all of the violent crimes happen in broad daylight. Like, it's noon.

And women are being lined up and ushered out of a warehouse. It is. In the bright light of day in slips. There's so many slips in this movie. There's so many slips. When he goes to talk to the police officer, he doesn't go to a police station. He doesn't go to a police cruiser. He just walks along the Williamsburg. Like most of this shot, most of this movie is shot in an abandoned lot in Williamsburg.

Like, truly, it's just like up against the fence. He's like, well, I'm a police officer, so I don't know what's going on with you. Well, as you're talking about that, I will say the reason why we picked this movie for New Jersey is if you look closely at the police officers, they have Hoboken Police Department on their badges. Hoboken Police Department, front and center badge.

And yet it's New York Ninja. But listen, we have so much to talk about, but I just, because we're on the police officers and their outfits, their costumes, their uniforms, I was so obsessed with the Maine Cops hat. Yeah, great hat. And I stared at it for so long. I paused it. I looked at it.

If he turned around and I had like a rear shot of it, I paused that to look at it again. Because it seemed that he had taken a trucker's hat that's meant to sort of sit atop the head. And he had folded it in the middle to sort of make a more like military style cap. And I thought, well, did they not have a hat that fit his head? And so he had to.

Who even knows? Or was that a choice? And again, that's what this movie left me with. Just like, I don't understand a thing and I want to know so much more and I love it. For example, if you will, indulge me while I read aloud the title card that shows up the first thing that starts in this movie. Please. 1984.

Crime is at an all-time high. Gangs of drugged-out punks roaming the streets, preying on the innocent. A rash of kidnappings involving young women has gripped the city with fear. The citizens of New York are fed up. The city needs hope. The city needs a hero. There is not a single punk in this movie. The street toughs are all wearing bandanas around their thighs like Chachi.

And one of them is dressed like a Halloween cowboy at one point. I was like, I don't get this. These are the people that you would put in the deep background in the movie Warriors. It was like deep, deep. Like, yeah, yeah, you're on camera. You know, it's like we just need bodies. And they all look, and I have a feeling the reason why they're all wearing masks is because they're the same actor. Right?

Over time and time again. But I'm even going to go one step further and say this. It doesn't seem like the city's fed up. No. As a matter of fact, it seems like business as usual. Yeah, you're so right, Paul. Like, people are still so comfortable in this city walking around warehouses and factories with no one around. Oh, and they're just like, chat, chat, chat, chat, chat. Until, like, a midday group of...

of Tufts descends on them. And the only hope is for John to slip away from his reporting crew so he can transform into the New York Ninja so that they can then be like, where were you? You missed it. Which is revealed very late. Like, the fact that John even works for the news is shocking. Shocking. Because it's like...

It would be like the movie Superman, but we don't meet Clark Kent or know that he has a job until like the last section of the movie. Like, oh, he's a reporter? Oh, okay. Like when he was carrying the sound equipment, because at first I thought he was just along with the news crew hunting down his wife's killer. When his wife gets killed,

Before she gets a knife to the belly, she's pregnant, by the way. Not cool. They slash her throat and she falls down the stairs like... She falls down the stairs like someone who has arthritis trying to do stunts. I got it. I still got it. But she then does a full...

As head roll, like a full dance move, which I loved. Loved. She might as well have gotten, it's as, I will say this, it's as if everybody in the movie knew they would be dubbed by someone else 20 plus years in the future. Like, it's so shocking to me that that's not the case because it makes so much more sense. Their performances are so enormous. Yes.

That they were like, well, we're going to have to make it big because we're not even recording sound. We'll have to dub this all later. Today's podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. I love Squarespace. I'm in the middle of trying to balance my business life and my real life. This work-life balance, it's tough. But Squarespace has been helping me by giving me the tools to reach my goals and have time to celebrate. That's right. Squarespace is the all-in-one platform.

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I just want to play the opening scene because just like the whole thing. Clip one here. Take a look at clip one. Sorry, I'm late. Happy birthday. What is that? Right. Pause. Pause. What is that? What is that? What is he giving her? Is it an anklet? Is it a bracelet? A necklace? A belt?

Akuma tape belt. I also want to know about the signs on the post behind them. Let's dance, one says. That feels like that was not art department. No, no, no, there's no art department on this movie. So he comes, gives her a gift, and then she's like, okay, gotta go. So was the idea like, let's meet up on the street corner for 30 seconds? Yes.

I can't be there long. Like, I didn't even understand. Because this is, you can read their lips. This is what they are saying. Yes. Happy birthday. Here's your gift. Gotta go.

Oh, I'm pregnant. Yeah. And then there's like, oh, one last thing. I'm pregnant. Goodbye. After they plan on having a romantic dinner that night and the dinner... Romantic, Paul. Well... Romantic? Honest to God, if she saw that, what that layout he had, she would happily be killed. She escaped a worse fate. The romantic dinner seems to be...

a birthday celebration for him. Unless he wanted to give her two ninja swords? That's what I couldn't figure out. Wait a second. I thought it was his birthday. No. Because, no, he reads a card she wrote to him. On your birthday, you don't write a card to someone else. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, watch. Hold on, hold on. Look. Incredible. It's not fair. It's not fair. It's not fair.

Why? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Oh, you know what? Maybe I cut out that part where he does read a card from her. He reads a card. And there's a framed picture of the two of them, too. I thought it was his birthday. And why destroy the framed photo, the memory of this woman who was just murdered? All of these things are worth examining, sure.

Real talk. Is he planning on giving her two swords for her birthday? That's all I want to know. Because I couldn't get that out of my head for the rest of the movie. So here's the thing. I was also fraught with this detail because that tablescape, that birthday dinner is already set up. So if it's...

I don't know. Because, like, if it's his birthday, then she just went to the rooftop of their apartment and left everything out there in the morning? And he walked into it? No, I think it's her birthday. And he set that up for her because he says, I'll see you later, blah, blah, blah. But why did she write him a card? Who on earth knows? Okay, so let's go one step further. Opening scene. World Trade Center. Opening shot of this movie, I was like, whoa, okay. Okay.

The opening scene, they meet. Happy birthday. I'm pregnant. See you tonight. She's murdered. Minutes later, we catch him on the roof. The news is found out, which means he's been sitting catatonically

All night long? No, I don't think so. So I think he sees his wife either during her lunch break or prior to work. Sure. Gives her whatever he gives her. Happy birthday. I'm pregnant. See you later. Great. She then walks away and is stone cold murdered. Right. Then what happens is we cut to the news director and the woman in the wig who comes into this scene right here.

And they say, did you hear about John's wife? R.I.P. We got to take care of him. Let's take a helicopter uptown? Let's take a helicopter to his house? I couldn't figure that out. I feel like what happened is John had access to a helicopter somehow, some way. John had access to a helicopter. They were going to get as much use out of it as it's in the beginning and it's in the end. Yes, absolutely.

And again, I tip my hat to him. At a certain point in this movie, a man is hanging off of a helicopter and flying through the air. It was amazing. That stunt on a budget of, I'm going to say, $15 because I'm equating 85 for the mask is scarier than anything Tom Cruise has ever done in Mission Impossible. Fully agree. 1,000%.

I mean, that is wild. And also, how did they get a permit for that? Because I don't think they got one. They didn't permit anything. And you know how I know? Because you revealed that it was shot in Hoboken, which in 1984 was a lawless place. I have to say something important. Jason, I don't think... What's her name, that character's name? Randy? Randy.

I don't think that was a wig. Zoinks. Which is even crazier. I think that that's hair. I think it's all hair. I think you're right. I think it is. Wow. There's no makeup on this movie, and I think she's like, I'm in a movie. I'm going to get my hair to be the third co-star of this thing. And it was. Her hair ran away with this film. I just had a thought. Do you think the samurai swords were a present for the baby? Oh.

If the framed picture was for her, but the swords were for the baby eventually. One day. Or a baby gift. That would be amazing because it would be like New York Ninja and Baby, like a cop and a half kind of a thing. Well, that's kind of where we end up a little bit. I guess. He does get like a mentee at a certain point. They go fishing together. In a Speedo? Yep.

It's so hard to know, though, what else was in those eight hours because I would love to have known what his history was as a ninja. Like, where he learned about this and, you know, why this skill hasn't shown up till now. There are so many unanswered questions. Where does he go to get his ninja stars monogrammed? Yes! Yes!

Great question. Because they are monogrammed as New York Ninja. So he definitely was at one point had a plan. It wasn't like New York Ninja returns. No, his branding of himself was like on point from the beginning. He saw that and he actualized it. He saw that there was a hole in the market. He saw the white space.

By the way... He's like, the city needs a vigilante. I need to identify myself. Can someone etch New York Ninja into these throwing stars? Yeah, and I feel like he bought them wholesale. He got a great deal. It would be like Batman putting, like, Batman on his Batarang. Yeah.

There is a moment, though, where the boss of the news channel says, we're making these. Like, they're making the news? He's like, you can keep that one. Why are you giving away merch? Are you part of the system at this point? I don't even know if it's merch. I think it's evidence. So this is what's so crazy. So one of the cops goes undercover at one point. Incredible work.

is immediately abducted. He's like, what are you wearing? She's like, I'm undercover. They're like, bag overhead, goodbye. By the way, the news reporter is abducted like 15 times. She can't walk two steps without getting abducted. Like, I mean, she is, you'd think she'd be a little bit more aware the third or fourth time. My question, now that we're, you okay, Jin? Do you need to stand up again?

Oh, God. What just happened there? I don't know. Just how many times that woman got abducted? She was abducted. She's like, oh, no, again? It's like, if you're her, you're just staying home. You're under, like, a self-imposed stay-at-home order. Just like...

Yeah, but she doesn't. She goes out. She literally, she's lying down in the back of a car. She's like, I got to go home. I got to go home. I got to get abducted. She's like doing Broadway level abductions. She's like, I got a noon show. I got a seven o'clock show. I got to just take a nap before the next one. It would be as if Rosanna Scotto got kidnapped every single day.

When she's out with Jack, her cameraman, right? Wait, that's her name, right? Rosanna Scotto. Okay, thank God. I was like, I'm pulling this, but I don't know if I'm right. When she is out, Randy, Randy? Yeah. When Randy's out with Jack, the cameraman, and they're capturing all this footage, and then the bad guys, the punks, start chasing them, Jack is like, peace, later.

He is like, "Lady, you're on your own." She doesn't get 10 feet and he's on the roof of a building. It's crazy. He is so out of there and she's like, "Come on, guy."

She is a victim of, I believe, and this is what I was going to say a moment ago, she is a victim of both sets of independent bad guys. One are roaming gangs of street toughs who just appear to want to beat, steal, kill, rape, pillage, whatever they're up to. And burn holes through newspapers. And burn holes through newspapers. And then there is the plot that is the... Okay. Okay.

Can we even try to break down this plot? I will try. So we have two top-tier villains, which are the man who is revealed to be an Interpol agent, who's like, they got a great guy to play him. Yes. Doesn't have an accent. Although in the closing credits, he's billed as Pale Man.

Pale man, great. And then he speaks to the plutonium killer who wears sunglasses all the time, has toxic touch. I'm not sure, but they want specific women abducted as per order by giving their headshots. Headshots, which would make me think they were models. But what are those abductions for? Interpol.

No. Yes. No. Interpol is investigating an international prostitution ring. But I think he's undercover like that cop lady. Yeah, he's undercover. He's the one who sips the martini like this. Oh, yeah. He's drinking a martini in his car. They're doing that. So he's giving those headshots undercover. And saying, get me these women and more. And then...

The bad guy gives him headshots. He's like, yeah. What's so crazy about it? I don't know why. That power dynamic I can understand. I feel like the guy that made the movie found a stack of headshots and was like, I'll put these in the movie. Use them. They used every prop they have. Like, at one point, one of the bad guys, one of the street thugs, had two, like, dolls with him. Inexplicably. Right.

Like a Welcome Back Cotter doll. Those two bad guys spend a tremendous amount of time in that lot in Williamsburg with the city in the background, or maybe it's Hoboken, I'm not sure. And the plutonium killer has... I have bad guys in cars. One guy talks in slow-mo. One guy talks in crazy chipper accent. Driver eats ponytail.

The driver is my favorite character. Me too. Incredible. Me too. Incredible character. At one point I was like, is that Elijah Wood? I wish. I wish for him that that was Elijah Wood in 1984. He looked so much like him and he was so incredible. And then his final fight sequence where he played the drunken, what was it called? It was the name of...

Oh, drunken sword style. Like Drunken Master and so forth. It was just so compelling. What I love about that, and if anyone has ever worked in production, one of the hard things about shooting exterior locations is that you lose the light. Which means that you start a scene and the light goes down and it doesn't match and you're racing to finish it before you lose the light. And in that final fight scene, they're like, no, we lost the light.

Like, there are... It's day, it's night, it's dusk. Doesn't matter. Things are happening. And I will say, the karate and the swordplay doesn't seem like it needed that much time. You could have probably gotten all that out in one take. Totally. Here's my question, though, about the Interpol pale man. So, he's undercover. So, in his undercover operation, he is comfortable with putting, like, I want to say a dozen women...

In chains for... I don't know how long. Oh, no, no. That's not him. That's not him. That's the plutonium guy. That's the other set of bad guys. The other guy... I don't think we ever see the plutonium killer fulfill an order to the pale man. See, basically, the plutonium killer's like...

He wants 20 girls. Well, we can't give them to him piecemeal. We got to give it over all at once. It's like he's doing a collection of them. He's like, what can we deny him to? But he keeps killing them himself, right? He keeps killing them himself? Is that the deal? So this is what's so confusing. Okay, so I didn't realize that. I thought that those girls were going to the pale man and that that was part of his sting. No, those girls are going to go...

No. So the Interpol guy is talking to the sunglasses guy to get him women because the sunglasses guy can kidnap headshots. Now I'm realizing headshots are probably from all the actors who auditioned for this movie. So that's what he's using. So he's like, I'll get you. You think there were auditions for this movie?

They said that every morning a different... They would lose the crew every day, so every morning they'd meet at the Howard Johnson's on 42nd Street, and they were like, all right, so today I'm the sound guy, I'm the... I'm stunts, and I'm makeup, and they would just go off and shoot. So the... That is actually true. It's in my notes. But so the plutonium guy... Yeah. Yeah.

He's ex-CIA. He's been exposed to plutonium. His side hustle is capturing tons of girls and selling them to the British man for prostitution purposes. Okay, so that's his side hustle. His regular day-to-day job is just killing women, like having sex with them. Well, I think the plutonium's an aphrodisiac. Wait, what?

Because... So you think this is, he's in a trafficking business. Yeah. And maybe Jim Caviezel is going to come in and save the day or something? I feel like, so we see him with plutonium twice, right? Like first he opens it up and he pretty much, I called it like an orgasm box because he opened it up and he's like... Is that what you look like when you orgasm? I'm doing him. I'm doing him.

And then his face sometimes melts, sometimes doesn't. Same with his hands. Yeah, and his hands also melt. So it seems like, but then he goes back to normal. That's odd. He has like a stigmata. He has like a big hole in one of his palms. And then when he's having sex in the car, he... With a woman who has the largest breasts we've ever seen in any movie, full stop.

I think I read that they had to get a bigger car to shoot it. I heard that was a specialty ad for Cadillac. I loved that woman because when we first saw her, I didn't imagine her breasts were going to be that big. So it was really like they kept on unfolding. Oh, yeah.

It's why. And the geography of that sex scene in the car was so confusing. Couldn't make heads. Couldn't make heads or tails. I was like, is she facing him? Then I realized she's facing away from him. I didn't realize they were having sex for a long time. Neither did I. I thought he must be killing her. I thought that she was like drunk or something. I didn't understand. I was like, why is she looking like she's having sex? And I'm like, oh.

And I felt dirty for watching it. And it was crazy. Like, the chauffeur was underneath her boobs. Trapped. Pinned. But then, and I don't know how this works, but I know that some people, like, they use poppers, right? Like, sometimes in sex, you use a popper, right? Is that a thing? Poppers. Is it a thing? Poppers. Are you asking Central New Jersey? Poppers. Poppers.

he seems to use plutonium as his popper and he's like and then he puts his plutonium hands on her

And she died. And that's the moment. But that melts her. But that doesn't kill her. No. He chokes her. He chokes her with the pendant that he used to hypnotize her very easily at a scene that was clearly shot during Halloween in Washington Square Park. All stolen footage. Absolutely.

he is in that scene. This is what the movie does. It makes you crazy because he's wearing a mask. He turns away and when he comes back, the mask is gone. Well, this is the same with the roller skates. Yes. Yes.

The roller skates. He's roller skating around doing ninja on roller skates action, which I was like, I don't get this at all. Because he's not a very good roller skater. He does not look comfortable. And then when he has to jump, he jumps over a car or he does a flip or something, he lands on flat feet, runs a couple of steps, and then he's on roller skates again. As if...

Yeah. Then they add in sound effects of feet. Yes. Can we just watch some roller skating clip four? Yeah, look what I got. Look what I got. Yeah, what'd you get? What the fuck are you? Oh my God. Look at this person in the background. Thank you so much. Look at everybody in the... I can't believe we got it back. That was amazing. Broadway and Bond. There you go. It's not agile. There you go.

Oh shit, right after this, skates again. Directly after this, it's a shot of his... Yes! Yes!

That is amazing. In the shot, can you rewind that for a second? Because watch that transition. Wait, what is that sign, that comedy sign? By the way, before we start it, I want to say New York has never looked better than in this movie.

Every building, all the graffiti, the subway, everything has such great visual complexity that I was riveted by everything happening in the background, including every person walking by being like, what the fuck is this?

One of my favorite moments is that robbery that when he's on the roller skates, we reveal that. It seems like the mugging happens and then they run about five feet away and they go, woo, we did it. High five. They don't go down an alley. They just kind of get about half a block. And he is able to be there in full ninja gear instantly. Which means...

I mean, look, it looks like a lot of crime is happening in the theater district. I was looking at all the great shows, La Cage a Faux. Cats. Cats. Oh, I'm sorry, but did everybody see that they walked past a movie theater playing Ninja 3, The Domination? Yes. I did not see that. A movie we've done on this podcast?

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One of my favorite moments in the movie is when he is meeting the cop for the first time. A young cop out on the street is like, "We'll get to your dead wife."

We got a lot of stuff going on. And then he stands in between two signposts, like a pinball. And he just goes, bing, bong, bing, bong, bing, bong. He just, I don't know. It's so crazy because at first I was like, wow, this is such a crazy interpretation of grief. And then I was like, actually, this feels very truthful in many ways. And I appreciate what the director did here.

I was surprised that in his grief, early in the movie, his wife has just died. He's got, you know, all of these things of hers that he's trying to process his grief and he's emotional. And at one point, he's present while a gang of thugs shake down a child. They are going to murder this child and he lets it happen.

John does nothing. He wistfully watches a child get beat up like, oh, those were the days. And then he shakes his head and then walks off, just like that woman who watched his wife get murdered in the subway stairs. People are immune to violence. And that kid is a little kid, and what could he possibly have done to the man wearing the Van Halen patch? He's wearing a Van Halen patch.

Like, I feel like, I didn't think that guy was into Van Halen. Not egregious or as egregious as the costume choice to put the mayor in ripped jeans.

At one point, I thought the mayor was wearing slippers. I would believe it if it was, because I believe they're just grabbing people and being like, stand right there, don't worry, just stay there. I think a part of the reason why most of the thugs, the gang of thugs, yes, they're in masks because we're doubling up on whatever five actors we have, but also, I think, so they could stand out amidst the crowd, like they had to look

They all truly looked like they had escaped a mental institution. They looked like the Joker's villains. It was like the Joker and his crew are out there. It's like they all are like clowns. They are dressed like clowns. Except that one of them, again, I hate to say it, is dressed like Woody from Toy Story.

And I'm not even kidding, and I wish I'd marked it so we could show it, but there's one group of Tufts that have all the normal looks, except one of them is wearing tiny Western gear like he's Woody from Toy Story. And it's fucked up. It's very strange. So, God, I wish we knew more about the costume designer because... I'll tell you the costume designer. So tomorrow, 8 a.m. at the Howard Johnson's, bring something weird.

Because even the women, though, and just to go back to slips for a second, because I grew up in the age of slips. Like, I wore a slip in the 80s. Slips seemed to me like the sexiest thing you could possibly have. Really? Oh, yeah. Because I never knew why I was wearing slips.

And I didn't know they were being forced upon me. And I think the idea, the actual function of a slip is so that you won't see through a dress, right? So that you won't see through another layer. Yeah, and isn't it also so a dress will hang straight and not get bunched up? I don't know about that. Well, but slip, are there slip experts? Any slipsperts? What? They won't slip to the stockings?

They won't stick to your dress. You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings. Of course. You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings. You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings. So... We just created a theater warm-up. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

That's how we're going to, every night before the show, we're going to be backstage. You wear a slip so your dress doesn't stick to your stockings. It's like a fashion version of My Fair Lady. But yeah, so the era of slips was also when we were all wearing stockings too. Again, no one knew why. It was just what you were doing. But all of those women were in slips, various shapes and sizes. But...

There was one woman who was wearing... I'll never forget it as long as I live. She was wearing stockings and her underwear over the stockings. So...

In what scene? In the scene where they're all leaving the warehouse. Oh, okay. She's wearing black stockings and like a light blue set of cotton underwear, thick, thick underwear over it. Also, a number of the bad guys are wearing cod pieces as if they're the Droogs from A Clockwork Orange. Yes.

Like, they're jock straps slash cod pieces. There are choices made in this movie that are astounding. And it is. I think you're right, Paul, in that it is all... I think there was nobody doing wardrobe. I think these are all the individual actors' interpretations of what they were told to dress as. So you think that woman was like, I'm going to wear black stockings...

But I want to wear my underwear over it. That's who I am. That's who my character is. Look at these guys. Look at this. I mean, each and every one of them is absolutely berserk. This is... We've got cowboy hat... Juggalo...

That's what they all feel like is juggalos. Yeah. What I feel like in this movie... This guy's wearing, like, a World War I pilot helmet. This guy's wearing the protective gear for some sort of sword play. This feels to me like a lot of villains that you played in the old arcade game Double Dragon. It's like...

And it looks like, even though that was like 8-bit resolution, this looks like 8-bit resolution. It's like the costumes don't pop. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. They wear a face mask. That's Woody. This guy has a cane with a tiny hand, by the way. I want to be clear. That is not the guy dressed as Woody, even though he's wearing a cowboy hat. That's not who I'm talking about. I appreciate you calling that out. I want to go back to the woman with the dress, with the slip and the underwear. In my mind,

she was brought in and they said well you just wear uh these stockings and she's like no i'm gonna wear some underwear here i don't want you to get any weird upskirt shots of me here yeah i think you're right i think it was protective it's also it's great to know that you're so into slips i had no idea that that was i thought i was like hey good slip action in this movie we don't get a lot of great slip action that's your that's your kink

I just felt like slips. I haven't really gotten a chance to, you know, experience slips. This tour has a lot of, like, fashion insights. We talked about body suits the other night. We're getting into all of it. One of my favorite moments is after the mayor does his interview, they just keep, like, the camera rolling for some small talk. It's like...

Glad it didn't rain today. I know. It was great. The kids are out in the swings. Oh, my God, we're under attack. But I just love that little bit of smoke talk about kids are out in the playground today. It was so banal. Like, why? Why do we need to be in this moment? And what, I guess, the question that I have is they had to kill John's wife. Why? Why?

Did they have her head shot? Oh, no, because they're trying to abduct the other woman, and his wife tries to intercede. But what would she have said? Oh, yeah, I saw Freddy Cufflinks, which is the character's name. When John bites the cufflink...

I was like, is he trying to get close to his dead wife? Is he trying to tell if it's real gold? Like, what's the... I don't know, because to be honest, we saw several tight shots of those cufflinks. They never looked the same. I was like, well, that one doesn't look like the one we saw before. And are we to assume the guy is just wearing one of them in the later scene? I don't know. It did seem like he was trying to...

taste them so that he could recognize them by taste. I felt like he was like, wait a minute, is this chocolate-covered cufflink? Nope, not him. Now, I think it would have been much more fulfilling if one of the main villains killed his wife because he does have multiple fight scenes, but not with Johnny Cufflinks, right?

No, Johnny Cufflinks, unless I have a feeling he's in a mask and he's one of these guys. So Johnny Cufflinks has an alter ego. You would think Johnny Cufflinks and his crew were the big bads. Freddie Cufflinks. Freddie Cufflinks? Oh, Freddie, sorry. So sorry. I'll be honest, if you know the names of the characters in this movie, fuck you. I'll give you all the names. The names are as follows. The Cameraman.

Freddy Cufflinks, The Kid, The Pale Man, Rico, Switchblade, Rattail. His name is Rattail? Incredible. Plutonium Killer. And then the two detectives actually have names, Detective Janet Flores and Detective Jimmy Williams. I will say, talk about Rattail one moment there. Rattail...

When he does tiny hands, it's one of my favorite things. I think it's a keychain or potentially like a cane top that has tiny hands. So when he is rubbing his own face with the gold hand, it's like that sketch that Kristen Wiig did on Saturday Night Live with the little tiny hands. And that clearly was a joke. Or...

I mean, it's crazy. It's a crazy moment. In a movie full of crazy moments. When... They leave a woman in the trash. They find her body in a trash can. They're like, well... All right, see you later. No, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Paul. They don't do that. They take the trash can off of the two wooden pallets it's on, set it next to the wooden pallets, then all walk away.

As if it's going to handle itself. I was so deeply connected to that woman, the actress. And I was like, I was literally just like, and I've still been thinking about her. Like she did, she did, she did that scene. You know, she did that scene in that car. Give her an Academy Award. Honestly, she deserves one. If only we knew who she was. And to not even be credited, maybe it's for the best.

The crazy thing about the trash can scene is that it's the first time the cops show up. Like, the uniformed police officers do not show up in this city, this crime-riddled city, until minute 50. And...

I will say. But that was New York City in the 80s. I guess so. It's so interesting because it was like the cops are nowhere to be found, but then when they do show up, they come as like a tensome. They're all together. And holding their badge, it gave me anxiety because they have to hold their gun.

and get their badge out. Like, here's my badge and my gun. And I'm in police uniform. Like, they need to show their badge to the New York Ninja? The crazy thing about the woman who's a cop who went undercover is that she dresses up in an I Love the New York Ninja t-shirt as her undercover partner.

But then she also keeps her badge on. Can I? Yes. She also keeps her badge on. She's also the character that when they find the woman in the trash can, she says, I'll have to do the autopsy to figure that out. So in my mind, she's the coroner. Wait, that's her? You're right, that is her. She's the coroner, or it seems as though she is. But then later, the coroner goes undercover? I don't know.

But then after being kidnapped and then released, like she says, well, I'll see you guys tomorrow. And then the other guy's like, I'll take care of the paperwork. What? Like they just rescued 30 women from an underground dungeon. He's like, I'll do that. As long as you're here by 9 a.m. and you get the coffee, okay? She's like, I gotta go sleep this off. I mean, these women are resilient. They come back.

Again and again. Oh, Randy. The movie should be about Randy. Because she goes through a tremendous amount. She really does. And Randy's hair, just to go back to it for one more second.

Randy's hair, it was like she had ten hairstyles in one hairstyle. I've never quite seen anything like it. It was like it was every hairstyle on one head. I wish she was here right now. I know. If only she didn't pass away mysteriously. I feel like everybody in this movie got on the same airplane lost style and has been like disappeared.

I'm going to go out into the crowd right now. I'm going to go check out what's going on. I'm also going to put on my special hat. I'll hold the mic, so don't worry about grabbing it. All right, here we go. What's your name? Jenny. Jenny, what is your question about New York Ninja? Well, it's more of a statement. Did anyone else notice that every newspaper headline had the same two stories underneath it? No, that's great. That's great.

They did get quick headlines out there. I mean, they had catchy headlines. And was the newspaper responsible? Well, basically, the head of the news organization does say, you're a great reporter. You've got to figure this out. Here's what I didn't understand. Is that why they wanted to capture the reporter so many times?

Because she didn't seem close to breaking that story. I will say, well, I will say the bad guy is like, bring me that reporter at one point. So there is a desire. They say something to the effect of she's getting too close to this or something, right? Something like that. Was that the bad guy in the cardigan?

Because there is a bad guy in a full-on cardigan as well. Really? Are you talking about the helicopter pilot? No. Are you talking... Who? The guys who meet the plutonium killer by the car, and he goes, hey, assholes. Like, that guy...

Remember when the... Wait, when he's in the car with the corpse that he just fucked? No. Oh. It's the scene after that. He's in the car as the chauffeur, and then your ninja jumps backwards or forwards with a net. By the way, he reveals he has great jumping ability too late in the movie. Yes. Great jumping and carries a full net, but you know what he never carries? His ninja swords.

Prominently placed in the beginning of the movie, never uses them in combat. Yes. You had a question? Which one? Oh my gosh. Let's go to you. Two things. One absolute favorite part is knife, catch, and then use it to stab the other thug. Second is, I don't know martial arts, are powder eggs a thing? Yes.

Is that like a... I called them flower grenades. His most used weapon is some sort of chalk egg that he throws in people's faces. Hold on, what is it? Okay, these two are telling me it's glass dust with such assurance that, Paul, you need to talk to them. Where are they? Right there. The glass dust twins. I'm so sorry.

All right, how did you know it was glass dust? The glass dust brothers. Followed out eggs filled with glass dust thrown in someone's eyes. You know this? Yeah, it's like a ninja thing. Oh. It's a ninja thing. I will say... Yeah, Paul, it's a ninja thing. You wouldn't get it, Paul. It's a ninja thing. I will say that person, if you are listening to the podcast, is in full ninja gear. All right, so...

Alright, what do we got over here? We have two ninjas in the audience. What do you got? Name your question. Name is Chris. My question is, have you ever seen a movie with this many guns that are not fired? Great question. Lots of guns pointed, very rarely fired. I'm assuming because once again, they were shooting scenes in public with unsuspecting people.

So you notice that there's a lot of like, when the guns, they just do this, and they're out of frame for a second, you know? All right, your name and your question. My name is James, and an observation first. The company that remade this movie, they're actually, their primary source of business is remaking old pornos. Is remaking old pornos? They remake old pornos from the 70s and 80s.

They remake them? What do you mean, like a reboot? Hold on, guys. I'm seeing something that's freaking me out. Is there a ninja? It looks like a ninja. Sir, are you hanging from the ceiling? He is. I just saw feet. Where? From the center of the... Where? Look.

Right here, right where the balcony starts, there are two hanging feet. Kick those feet. Show us those feet. Can we turn the projector off? Oh, yeah. Oh. Yeah, stand up. There's a guy standing now. Stand up and show. What are you up to? Oh, he's running the projector. Well, you're amazing. Give it up for this guy. Okay. That freaked me out.

That can't be code. That can't be safe. Only in Jersey. Just to be talking to that gentleman about 70s pornos and then seeing feet hang down. Freddie, we're going to need you to hang off of the tubes and run the projector for the dumb podcast show. These fucking animals are coming in. They're going to tear the place apart.

So tell me, I see a lot of notes out. What do you got? Question slash comment. The helicopter pilot that they kidnap, right? They kidnap him, but then when the New York Ninja jumps on the helicopter, the pilot actually attacks him.

Well, I guess he was brainwashed, right? Very quickly. Stockholm syndrome sets in quick, especially when you go to higher altitudes. I was obsessed with that helicopter pilot because to make the choice, because I do think that that was that actor's choice. I think unless he didn't know he was being filmed, that's also a possibility. That was John Liu going, you want to be in a movie? And he's like, let me fight.

Okay, well, it doesn't work for the plot, but sure. And that's what happened, I think. Yeah, he's like, okay, but I want to kick the ninja's ass. And he's like, well, that wouldn't be what's happening. Do it anyway. And then the bomb that you have to... It's like a radio... It's movies for the mind. Enough context clues are there. Like, I guess it blew up? I heard a tick, tick, tick, tick, tick. Where was the bomb? We never saw... And somebody says, like, is that a bomb?

Well, again, that's $100. So you have to think about the face melting and the bomb all done for under $100. We didn't even talk about the face melting. Can we play that clip for a second? Where are the bad guys? Am I the only one who found you? Thank God, Jack. Can you pause for a second? You're telling me that's not a wig?

I am, actually, and I know it's confounding, but I do not think it is. Is it a wig by applause? I have no... Is it Central Jersey hair? Yes, yes. Now that the lights are up, I am seeing a lot of this hairstyle out there. There are some people who have... I know, who have confusing hair where it...

It absolutely looks like a wig, but it's not a wig. I mean, the shortness of the top, the long of the back, it's a mullet. But Jason, if you were a wig maker, you'd never make this. That's also why I think it's not a wig. I believe she made it herself. It is a wig wearing a wig. Oh, so you're saying you think she might have a wig underneath that wig? You think it's a wig on a wig? You think she's double wigged?

I think there's a baby wig. I think there's a toupee on a wig that's on top of extensions. And I think that that actress is John Liu. By the way, the plutonium killer, can we start this again? Because he starts not wearing his sunglasses and then just is, right? Oh, no, he is wearing. No, this part, I didn't understand at all. Where are the bad guys?

Am I the only one who found you? Thank God, Jack. Are you okay? Come with me. Oh, look. It's the ninja. Yeah? So what? I don't have time for that. Let's go, Randy. You're not Jack. Oh, no.

Get away, get away! Finally! Now here's the thing. What the fuck is this movie?

And you would think that this would be like, aha, okay, it's all coming together. But, like, he's using the mirror. Oh, he's photosensitive, right? No, no, he's light sensitive. So here's the thing. I know it's photosensitive, but what I'm saying is... He's not sensitive to photographs. What?

I guess what I'm saying is, in the idea, in the idea of the movie, like if vampires are photosensitive or sensitive to sunlight, whatever it is, you don't need to put more light in his face. Like, the sunlight would do the trick. I think, but this, I don't know, because this scenario he's in is tricky because he's wearing a jack mask.

Anybody here wearing a Jack mask? Three people. I mean, he went to great lengths to perfectly replicate... I don't know how you would do that. ...including body type. But I believe... Jack the cameraman. I believe that that... Whose car got trashed. Jack, that's your car. Again, the lengths they are going to to capture Randy. Yeah. By the way... Jack, that's your car. At one point, Jack and Randy...

who are sent to investigate this wave of crime go, "Oh my gosh, these people are crazy!" It's like, "Yeah, that's the assignment, that you're covering them! You should be surprised at it!" But Jack, I believe, there's voodoo going on. Because the plutonium killer looks at the headshot of Jack, don't know why Jack has his own headshot, and when that melts away, is that how he's making the face?

What do you mean you think it's his actual skin? Hang on. Hold on. One of the ninjas has an answer. They're so far away from me. You can wait. I'll get down. We'll repeat it. We'll repeat it. Hang on. Oh, you think it's Jack's face that he's wearing as a flesh mask.

Got it. Oh, so he killed Jack and cut off his face and put it on himself and wore it like a mask. And it worked so well that Randy thinks it's Jack. Guys, we know face off. I'm with a group of people in I Love New York Ninja shirts. Oh, really? Yes. Who has the best question out of the three? Okay, you do. All right. Your name.

I am Will, and just like an observation I made, or actually my mom made, is that the helicopter that he plants the bomb in and the helicopter that the bomb explodes in are two different helicopters. Wow. Where's your mom? Good helicopter eye, mom. How do you get on that helicopter tip? Just paying attention all the time, nonstop. She got it. Yeah, that's it.

Can't get away from that mom. All right. Well, obviously, we have an opinion about this movie. There are people out there with a different opinion. It is now time for second opinions. Start joining news crews and bite your ponytail brave. I want to give five stars to it. New York Ninja. Woo!

His murdered wife blues better make you afraid. My second opinion, it's a New York ninja. If he can melt your face, he'll melt it any place. Good luck, Mr. Lou, New York ninja.

What's your name? Gross! Amazing! Great work! Great job, New Jersey! You did it, New Jersey! And now, New Jersey's own Bruce Springsteen! He's not here. What if he was, though? He has a podcast. He's a big fan. I like how you talk about those crazy ninjas. My dad was a ninja. He didn't make much money, but he did have those stars. I remember me and the big man, we used to watch these ninja movies.

♪ Shunning those ninja stars ♪ ♪ Throwing them into throats ♪ ♪ It was different long ago ♪ ♪ Before they emblazed them with New York Ninja ♪ I wrote that about my dad.

All right, here's the deal, people. Sadly, and I hate to do this to you because it is a live show, not many five-star reviews. There are only 78 total reviews on Amazon, and they aren't as good as we would expect, but here's the thing. It's a new movie, and I think some people get it, some people don't get it, but the people who do say things like this. I can't believe this is a new movie. Yeah.

I can't. This whole endeavor feels insane. Betty Smore's title, Secure and Sturdy. Review, awesome movie. If you're looking for a cult classic, five stars. Secure and Sturdy? That sounds like an Amazon review for a footstool. And then accidentally it was logged under this.

I know, and then this is the one that I like the most from James. James writes this. Men will literally become the New York ninja instead of going to therapy. Five stars. That is true. That is true. So many men, when faced with life's biggest problems, rather than admit weakness and go to therapy, they will instead just try and become a ninja. Yeah.

You need to deal with the loss that you're feeling from the death of your parent. No, I must become a ninja. I will say a couple of things that we didn't touch upon. The way they were keeping these women in the warehouse seemed to be, I don't understand layouts and space, but it seemed to be they could have gotten more women involved.

But they seem like they ran out of things. Like, you'll be on top of this cord barrel. You'll be on a giant frame. You're going to be like... It felt like they were under, like, COVID restrictions. Like, they were all, like, six feet apart in there. Well, it did come out in 2021. So...

I'm honestly like, did this director compile this movie for us? I feel like the way that he goes in there and slices through steel like it was a cobweb. Tink, tonk, tink.

Everyone gets out immediately. I was so obsessed with the dubbing where every woman, once the sword broke through her chains, had to make some sort of a sound. It was like, oh! Did you do the dubbing for this movie? I didn't know how to say it. It's so strange. It's an odd movie. It ends on probably one of the best scenes

ending scenes ever the reporter goes back to the roof where it seems like from the plot of the movie she's left him from the beginning like john did you hear they got freddie cufflinks or whatever his name is killers and he's like oh i wonder how that happened and he looks right at the camera like and then we get this amazing still uh the la ninja still which la ninja

Yeah, you didn't see that? Oh, I didn't see that. Jason! I didn't see this. The ninja will return in L.A. Ninja, and that comes out in 2024. Here's what I'll say. That is still New York. Well, he's heading there. He'll get there eventually. So, I guess I'm just now realizing that our New York ninja, our hero, that pilot, that unsuspecting pilot died in that plane crash.

In that helicopter crash, huh? Yeah. Wow. Look, that's pilots when they decide to fly. Well, he didn't decide. He was coerced. Well, I mean, look. Hold on. This guy seems to know something. I really regret this, but what did the plutonium killer say?

All right, so the man says, I'll make you a rich man. The plutonium killer says, I'll make you a rich man if you help me kill the ninja, which is right because the ninja is now hanging off the helicopter. He says, okay. I guess he deserved to die. Jason, June, before we wrap up, would you recommend this movie? Absolutely, yes. As would I. I would happily right now go and sit there and watch the movie in full.

Here's the part where I said I would go and sit there. I would not go and sit there because these maniacs are there I thought it was great and I and Let's rescue more abandoned films. You know people don't talk about it Bob Barker you say spay and neuter your cats Let's go find these abandoned films. Let's get them back. Can we play the Sarah? We play the Sarah McLachlan song behind this please

Pictures of ninjas, sound machines, Tommy Wiseau. We must find these abandoned films. Thank you, Central New Jersey! You did it! You did it, Jersey! Thank you. This is amazing. We love coming to New Jersey. Our first time. We will be back. Thank you, Red Bank. Thank you, everybody. Give it up for Jason. Give it up for June. Give it up for Beth.

Give it up for yourselves. Merch is available. We're getting shit. New York didn't do that. Thank you. Oh my gosh. This is amazing. Thank you everybody so much. Good night. Bye bye. Eat shit New Jersey.

Thank you so much to the staff of the Count Basie Theater. We love being in Red Bank. Our amazing tour manager, Beth Thomas, for always being there, pulling the best clips in the biz. And everyone in that audience who came in costume. Yes, I'm giving up to those who came in costume for such a great show. If you want to feel like you were there too, well, you can. Because we have a special t-shirt designed by the live audience that night. That's right. The shirt says, I Heart You.

New Jersey Ninja, in the style of I Heart New York. It is a great shirt. It has a little wig hairstyle over the heart. You can snag that shirt as a shirt, sweatshirt, sticker, coffee mug, whatever you want, and more. Just grab that at tpublic.com slash stores slash HDTGM. And if you are looking to represent HDTGM this holiday season, a brand new How Did This Get Made? Ugly Sweater is in your future. They are on sale now at podswag.com slash ross.

We have four different sweater designs, Geostorm, Team Sanity, Team Fred, and...

a Jack Frost, a Snow Dad's better than no dad. I love these. They're great. They're not going to fade. They're good material. They're comfy. Get them all at pod swag.com slash bonkers. As always, we are on the road the next couple of weeks in Chicago and Minneapolis head on over to hdtgm.com to snag your tickets. And we got some bonkers movies for you next week on last looks

You know we're going to be going over corrections and omissions from New York Ninja. So if you have something you want to add to get off your chest, leave me a voicemail at 619-P-A-U-L-A-S-K or write a comment on our Discord at discord.gg slash hdtgm. And of course, as always, Jason will stop by for chat and we will announce our next movie. We may even share a bonus deleted scene from this very episode that you just listened to. That's right. Last looks bigger, better.

every single week. And if you haven't heard, we are on the hunt for a brand new theme song for this very show. That's right, How Did This Get Made? And if you're a musician and you think you have what it takes to record an earworm, send us a theme song submission at howdidthisgetmade at earwolf.com or post them to our Discord in the theme song channel. Remember, you can find us everywhere online at at HLM.

HDTGM. If you love the show, tell your friends. Tell them to listen. A word of mouth helps so much. Oddly, it's the thing that people tell me the most that that's how they find out about the show. And by the way, it's so much better when you have to watch these bad movies alone. And last but not least, I got to say thank you to all the listeners who support this show every week. Our entire behind-the-scenes team who keeps this show running. I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sonney, Molly Reynolds, our movie-picking producer,

Avril Halle, our engineers Casey Holford and Rich Garcia, and our associate producer Jess Cisneros, who makes those amazing social media videos. That's all I got, people. We'll see you next week on Last Looks. Until then, bye for now. I'm just gonna be here now

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