Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
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bas.com slash bonkers and use the code bonkers at checkout. Exorcism is about as hard as doing an Italian accent. We saw the Pope's exorcist, so you know what that means. ... ... ... ... ... ...
Today, we are talking about The Pope's Exorcist, a movie that came out in 2023. A movie...
that is based on a true story. This is fact. What do you need to know about this movie? Well, a couple things. The Pope has an exorcist, and he sends him out like a goddamn Ghostbuster. When there's a problem, Russell Crowe jumps on a Vespa, which we'll discuss, and saves the goddamn day. This movie is amazing, and not just the accents.
There are so many things to break down, so many things to talk about in this movie, but here is just a little subject line. It's fucking awesome. More movies like this. More loose-fitting clothes on Russell Crowe, because I think it brings out something good. No belts, better performances. Okay. Ladies and gentlemen, to break down tonight's movie, please welcome my co-host, Mr. Jason Manzoukas. What's up, Dirk?
I love it. I love it. June and I already heated backstage. We were literally mid in the middle of it. You said my name and I was like, oh, shit. The show is happening. Fuck. Yeah. Friday night. Largo. Here we go. No, Jason. No, no. Saturday night. Saturday night. Largo. Is that can it can it be Saturday night at Largo?
Right here with all these fine folks? All right. I guess it's Saturday. Fine. Start the show over. Start the whole show over. Fuck, I fucked it up. I said it was Friday. I fucked up the whole show. Fuck. Jason. This movie with my new favorite Italian actor, Russell Crowe. Oh, he's so Italian. Oh, he's so Italian.
Jason, where do you fall on this movie? I mean, because I'm watching this and I am enjoying the hell out of it while I have a lot
to say about it, but I'm also finding it scratches an itch for me that I like. I had a blast. And this is 100% a movie I full-on would never have watched. Never. But for this podcast. And I genuinely was like, I'm so grateful that I'm watching this right now earlier this afternoon because I was like, fuck you. This is crazy. This is crazy.
Like, everything seems, like, perfect, and I'm delighted. But I'm... I only want to talk about the very end of the movie, and I can't yet. I'm, like, chomping, so let's get into it. Okay, great. Specifically... The good news is... Whoa. Whoa.
This was a woe. It's not an overly complicated plot as far as what we have to get through. I don't know, because there are at least seven multi-minute exposition dumps that are not helpful to understanding the movie. Here's all I'm going to say. Kudos to any movie that retcons the Bible. And you know what? Here's someone who retcons everything you know about a great podcast host. Please welcome June Diane Raphael. Thank you.
Welcome, June. How are you, Paul? I'm doing well. Thank you for asking. June, just before you say anything, it is Saturday night. So many... This opening is so rocky because Jason and I backstage... I did say the Pope's exorcist? I did say that because... We're really doing a behind-the-scenes tonight.
Because when I was watching it, I thought... When I saw the title and I saw... And Russell Crowe is one of my favorite actors. And I stand by this performance and I stand by him 100%. I stand in solidarity. He is. He's one of our finest Italian actors. I love him. One of the greats. I enjoy the hell out of him. Crowe. He's so good. He's so good. But, Paul, what I thought for a good portion of this movie...
was that the Pope of the Catholic Church would need an exorcism at some point. And I thought, this is the best concept for a movie I've ever heard of. And I'm so excited to see a Pope get exorcised. By the way... Okay, sorry. Go ahead. No, I was like,
Isn't that kind of what happens, but we never see it because the Pope in the middle of this movie just vomits blood. Well, I thought, so I did in that exact moment think, oh, because that's when they're saying, oh, the demon has possessed multiple people. I was like, oh, he's going to grab the Pope as well, especially after that vomiting of the blood. And then the Pope is 100% cool afterwards. So that's when I was like,
Well, he's for sure possessed because now he's healthy and doesn't have any ailments anymore. I honestly... I think he just had a virus. You think he just... I've truly been... You think he had RSV? Yes. Because the way they talked about his illness, it was like, the Pope is ill and we don't know what's going on. I shouldn't have had that Subway tuna club. But...
Just out of real curiosity, and please be cool about it, is there anybody in the audience who may be able to help us with Vatican and or Pope questions, as I am certain they are going to be brought up. But do you have an actual ability to front row you do? What front row? You grew up Catholic. Well, I did too. Well, I grew up Catholic too. Doesn't make me an expert on Vatican politics. Anybody? Any bishops or cardinals? Yes.
In the house. Jason, all I'm going to say is this. This is based on a true story. So everything we see here is laid out perfectly. This movie... My first note, the movie that asks, what if Russell Crowe is Italian? Okay, but seriously, I know we're all doing jokes about him. I thought he did great. He did great. He is... He did fucking great. He is great. But I did great. I would love an Italian person to weigh in.
on this performance because I will say I also saw Russell Crowe play Zeus in the recent Thor movie. He only plays Greeks or Italians now. He's deep in this accent. All I'm going to say is that Russell Crowe does what he wants and I like this new era of Russell Crowe where he doesn't have to be fully built. He doesn't have to be a gladiator. No. But when I first saw him on screen. He's like enjoying the holidays. Yes.
Yes. It's his body type, and I appreciate it. I need him. I'm ready for him, in fact, to be just like full-on dad bod, rolling. The idea that he's basically James Bond as a priest by the end of this movie. It's so great. I can't not do it. I want this to be what a faith-based movie is.
And if the church was smart, they'd be making these instead of the Jim Caviezel rescues children from child traffickers or whatever. This should be faith-based movie making. Well, I mean, I love the way that this movie opened because, again, if we think about the Pope's exorcist as the new James Bond, you have this amazing opening.
patient Vespa and he's going to go talk to this possessed person. They keep on calling him a boy, by the way. That's an adult male. Yeah, that person was an adult. The first one is like, just because he has track pants on, that's a 36-year-old man. I just like that the opening of this movie, by the way, this is a period piece, just in case, you know, if you've not watched it, it's a period piece. So, uh,
But the period piece is the 80s. Yes. The 1980s. Right? Yes. It's like 87. But there's something so funny about we've watched these exorcism movies. We understand a certain thing. He's like, hey, devil, I bet you can't get inside a pig. And the devil's like, I can sew. I can get in a pig any day. Get in the pig. Yeah.
to the pig. Bam! They kill the fucking pig. I was like, this is awesome. That's great. I'm just thinking about the church's stance on this movie, the Roman Catholic Church, and I'm always thinking about them. I'm always thinking about... Did you look into it? I didn't, but I... No, I didn't go that far. But I just was musing because at a certain point I thought, is this... Are they trying to...
say that the Roman Catholic Church had nothing to do with the Spanish Inquisition. I'm asking you. Well, that's the retcon, yeah. They are, yes, they are, because it was the devil. Because it was the devil. So it's like, it's also weird about that. It's like, didn't the Pope, the real Pope, or Pope John? Don't look at me. One of the recent Popes, like, did come out and fully apologize for the Inquisition.
Yeah. And so... Well, let's be clear. They're having to apologize for quite a lot. And by the way, that was what was so funny. It's like, I kept on watching this movie just thinking like, wow, in this world, priests are only interested in women. And that's hilarious. I wrote that too.
I have that same note. Their burden is the women, the grown women that they feel there's some connection to that they love. Yes, but can you please have the young boys haunt them for the rest of their fucking days? The young boys, young boys pull them in by projecting beautiful women. And that may be also a retconning of the whole Catholic child abuse scandal. What was crazy to me was the devil's,
It's true. Because every time one of those women are appearing before the priest, it's the boy saying and doing all of that. Yes. Think about that. I wrote down multiple quotes that the little boy says, but it just happens that the priest sees it as a grown woman. Okay, so in the world of this movie...
In the world of this movie, the Catholic Church started the Spanish Inquisition because the devil got a hold of a friar. Yes. And he was able to then sow evil. One friar. Yeah. One specific friar would have loved to have met him. Would have loved to have seen him.
What's crazy is that the devil's plan in doing this is that they can awaken all of the other army of devils, demons rather, fallen angels rather, who are somewhere on earth, the 199 other locations, blah, blah, blah, so they can raise an army of fallen angels to destroy the church. My guy, give it another couple of years. The church is destroying itself.
Also, I felt like the devil's position was that the Inquisition wasn't successful. And I'm like, I feel like it did a number for many, many years. It definitely had an impact. I mean, here's the explanation of it. And by the way, a bold choice. Here we go. The exorcist becomes possessed himself. You know, he is the man who convinced Queen Isabella. Father Guido's Hadoukiesque.
So that means from the time he is possessed in 1475, everything that happens after this is the work of the devil. Centuries of persecution and torture, the worst abuses of the Inquisition, all started by the friar and done in the name of God by the devil. The Vatican must have known this. The church covered it up and they buried the truth here. I mean, so it's not the church's fault? Great news, everybody!
Get back on the train. By the way, I do think, and maybe you can't ever get rid of it, but Russell Crowe has such a distinctive brogue or there's an energy behind it that any accent doesn't sound right really on him. I disagree. Okay, wow. At certain points I thought, oh, in his history, for
father father crow his history is that he he moved to italy as an adult and like that's when he went to seminary and stuff like i i justified it and i thought oh italian isn't his first language but i believe i thought so i was trying to have that happen because this movie's also doing that thing that bad movies do expertly which is
jump between English and other languages, Spanish, Italian, as needed in conversation, not as needed by, as needed in conversation for us, the audience, not how they would speak to each other. I disagree because the way, okay, I thought it was a brilliant choice to have the first 20 minutes be subtitled Bold Move.
For a mainstream commercial film. All right, so first 20 minutes, Russell Crowe, subtitle, and then he goes, and then you see him talking to another priest in the Vatican, and then it just, boom, English. And you're like, oh, they're speaking Italian. And then like, oh, no, they're not. No, they're not. They're switching to English. Yes. And they do that... And everyone... They do that throughout in ways that are so preposterous and absurd. The Vatican's like, speaking English! And then... What? And...
Yeah, it is. And one of the guys in the Vatican's American. And then it was only late in the movie when Russell Crowe introduces himself as an Italian man that I was like, wait a minute. Because I also thought he was just like had learned Italian for his job and that was that. But he was still Russell Crowe. Oh, and then the other priest is Spanish. But when Julia comes in,
She's just full on English. Like, hey everybody, welcome. Yep, we bought an Abbey. Anyway, so Peter, Frederick, what are we doing here at the roof? No attempt at anything. I would love it if Cameron Crowe did a remake. We bought an Abbey. Crowe v. Crowe. I just want this movie to acknowledge that everyone had a universal translator. It is what it's like.
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But it really is. I mean, I buy it. I like what Russell Crowe is doing. I think what's interesting and makes it compelling is it's a great performance. It's a great performance. It says so much that he's such a good actor that he can pull off and literally shoulder this whole movie, which arguably should be about the family, the people that this is happening to. This family doesn't give a shit.
with "hate" written across his chest, and the daughter's in the other room, like, listening to her Walkman, like, "Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah." Like, she's acting like, "Oh, Mom and Dad are fighting over the bills."
No, your brother is fucking puking birds, which I had to rewind. I thought it was a heart. I thought it was great. Where was the bird from? The woman. I don't know. I remember. Come on, the movie makes so much sense. No, it's in Russell Crowe's flashback. Okay. The woman who he didn't save eats a red bird. And then the boy vomits the same bird up. I didn't.
You said that so confidently, but I don't think anyone jumped on board with it. Let me see. Hold on. I'm going to go out to the audience because you're off mic. Where are you? Where are you? Can we get up? You did. You said it confidently. This is dangerous. All right. So what did you say? Because you might be right. So when Russell Crowe is in the resistance and he like fake dies and then comes back to life, the first thing he sees is the Cardinal. Now that makes sense. You're right. Okay. Perfect. Perfect.
But that is a, that's like that kind of retconning or weirdness when, like, I don't know, this is a real deep dive, but in Death on the Nile where they had to explain why Hercule Poirot has a big mustache. Yeah.
Like, it was a weird... Like, why are we going back to this? I also thought to dive into sort of, like, the trauma of what Russell Crowe experienced in war, the... This is where the movie makes certain choices where I'm like, it is... Certain choices are so insane. Just, like, absolutely wild. And then his backstory as a soldier was actually very subtle and not... I mean, I'm not saying it wasn't traumatic. It must have been terrible to experience what he experienced. But...
I thought for sure at a certain point we're going to see a longer version of that scene and he's going to have done something really terrible. But what we really just see is that he pretended to be dead and that he has survivor's guilt, which is so nuanced and so... There's no sort of...
Excuse me? The audience is really getting into it tonight. Again, I was worried about this guy. This guy's been on his best behavior so far. It's a lot of other people popping in now. It's so interesting because everybody's contributions are also at personal level. Yes. Volume-wise. Yes. I feel like we're interrupting their conversation. I did say you're a part of this show, but not this much. Well, I...
It is trauma-like. It is trauma-like because... But at one point, we get, during another exposition dump, an explanation about who's possessed. And it is certain people who have experienced trauma are more susceptible to possessions. And that was upsetting to hear. Yeah. I was like, haven't they been through enough? I have a question about this. And this is going to be... I'm opening myself to you. Okay. It's a safe space. Is it?
Why in all these movies are people in the bed? If the devil's inside you, just go out and fucking go do some stuff. I had the exact same question. I had it in a slightly different way, which is why does the possessed person always go through the exact same series of stuck in a bed, vomiting stuff, crab walk upside down, gravity doesn't apply to me, I'm climbing. To me, it's like a book. Stop.
Stick a crucifix in your breast. I'm out. Like, I'm walking. I'm done. I'm like... Like, they hang out in the bedroom like they're, like, unemployed. I don't know why...
Get a job, Henry. Get a job. And everyone has to come into this room. He's not tied to the bed. He can leave at any point. He seems very powerful. How about this? The minute shit goes sideways and Russell Crowe shows up, guess what? I'm telling the mom and the sister, get out.
That was crazy. And I had to do some mental gymnastics about why they stayed in that house. I was like, well, they couldn't afford to go anywhere else. It is irresponsible. I'm also like, put it on some Marriott Bonvoy points and get a hotel. Russell Crowe tells them to make some coffee. He's like, you guys go to sleep while I take care of this. He's like a plumber. He's like, well, okay.
I'll clean the toilet, but it's going to take me. I got to get the guys here anyway. Take a nap. Here's my super quick question. He is based at the Vatican, right? This is in Spain. He arrives on his Vespa. It's moving. Does Russell Crowe ride a Vespa to Spain?
Listen. Real question. Hey. Where's that picture of him on the Vespa? Forget about it. I mean, really? And then when he's back at the Vatican, he is entering on the Vespa again. I don't know if there are train cars that are just for Vespas. I will say this. I was like, this is blowing my mind.
By the way, this is a true story. So you would imagine that the Vespa probably is something that the real guy. Yeah. No. Oh, that's just something that Russell Crowe decided to add. I love that. Thought it would be cool. You know what? Goddamn right. He's absolutely right. He is 100 percent right. Because not only is it so memorable, but because it makes no sense, it is clearly the whim of an actor.
To be like, no matter where I am, I ride a Vespa. I loved it. The same Vespa. Big guy on a little bike. I loved it. By the way, before we get too deep into the movie, I did want to just touch this one comment that the mom makes. The mom says...
to the daughter you got to stop dressing like this we're you're you're not in america anymore we're going to be surrounded by contractors and my thought on that is interesting it's like so american contractors would not as flirtatious or like like it's the way she says it's like italian contractors are really spanish oh spanish yeah because they're in spain at that point but spanish yeah yeah i
I was more shocked that as chaos ensued, she seemed to be wearing less and less clothing. Like, maybe I understand her act of rebellion upon arrival at the home and to stick it to her mom. But once things get real nutso-magutso with the demon, guess what? I'm putting all my clothes on and I'm wearing my sneakers in case I need to get the fuck out of this house. I...
I'm going back... I got my go bag. I'm going back through the... So it's a period piece. Maybe she's a fan of Andre Agassi, so she's wearing the jean cut-off shorts. But also, it's one of those... I mean, it's a great moment in the movie because they seemingly have been traveling forever and the mom's like...
Why are you dressed like that? It's like they've been in the car for hours. Like, why are you just noticing that she's in jean shorts now? I also felt like I needed a little explanation from the mom about why they had to move in that quickly. Sell the house. And also, why did they? It is a, I'm not kidding. Also, there was a big wide shot at one point where it looked like Hogwarts. Yeah.
The house was enormous. You can sell it from America. Oh, yeah. You don't need to dress it up. You don't need to live in it. Someone wants to buy this Spanish castle. Flip the Abbey. You don't need to flip. It really is like...
Is it going to go for that much more? What would you put in? An elevator? Throw the property brothers on it. No, let me ask you this. Do you think that the dad getting impaled in the car in front of the son and dying and starting this whole process of the construction opening up the portal to hell, do you think that that was the devil's plan somehow? Or that was just sort of convenient? Yeah.
I think it was convenient. Yeah, but I don't know. I can't figure out what the long-term plan of anybody is in this movie, but it did seem to be more happenstance. The construction precipitated the opening of whatever crack. The hell, Malcolm. It's a Buffy. This Abbey was built on top.
I think it probably was something I missed in one of the exposition dumps in the beginning where he's like, go to the library, read all the research, and he goes there. And I think there's something about that abbey's location and the abbey was on the place where they hid the fact that the Spanish Inquisition was the devil's work. No, the abbey is... Okay. Okay.
The Abbey and its well of skulls, those I believe are the fallen angels that the devil is trying to wake up to use. There are 200 sites, so apparently there's going to be 200 installments of this movie series. Each one, they find a new site. Each site has 200 fallen angels. That's going to be the devil's army. Is that wrong? All right, hold on. This audience is not with me tonight.
This is this is like going to a murder mystery everyone has one piece of information from the movie that they were able to retain and then when you get together with 200 people you can actually nail it who said yeah, okay, who where where okay? Yes, all right in the back. Okay. What what is the right answer? The skulls belong to the victims of the Spanish Inquisition the fallen angels each get their own site. I see I see I'm sorry wait is that Tim? Yes, I
Of course. Okay, Tim, I take it back. You can criticize me. But none of you other motherfuckers can. Also, Tim, what are you doing in the back, my guy? Tim's being smart. He stretches out. It's better back there. Okay.
That makes, okay. It makes a little sense, not a lot. But then why, what was the, okay, well, maybe, Tim, you can just yell. Paul, you don't have to go back. What was the Hellmouth? Because it's built on a Buffy-style Hellmouth where I was like, is this a place where the separation between Earth and Hell is, like, thin?
and you can traverse it? What is the thing? They do go downstairs and they go, ooh, getting close to hell. And it only seems that they went about 20 feet below the surface. Yeah. There was a lot of gas and sulfur. But then there's the puddle on the ground that appears to be like a hole to hell? I don't know. I was like, what is this? And then the Virgin Mary comes out of it and then she turns into a demon. Oh, I thought that was Jesus. Jesus.
Hang on. Tim? I thought that was Jesus. Was that Jesus? No, I think it was the Virgin Mary, wasn't it? Wow. Yeah. I mean, look. Because isn't that... Boy, oh boy.
This movie is... For how much the movie is about, like, a hero priest vanquishing pure evil with the power of the Holy Mother and Jesus Christ. This is fucking wild. I mean, this to me... And we're all like, uh-huh, uh-huh.
But I really... This, to me, this little scene kind of encapsulates the tone. Can I just say, this kid is great. Amazing. Amazing. Amazing. This kid is doing fantastic work and is covered in prosthetics and fake teeth and all sorts of stuff. But I thought he was giving a great performance, especially in the first scene between when Russell Crowe arrives and the kid...
sits up in bed when Russell Crowe starts praying and they have their first back and forth. Dynamite. The kid is fantastic. I love it. This is, I think the scene I'm right in saying this is probably the tone of the movie, which I kind of love, but it's also weird. Here we go. You don't know who the is. Then tell me. Tell me your name. Unless you are too afraid. I'm not some stupid fuck. You convinced to get into a peg. So you won't tell me your name.
That tone is amazing.
This right here is giving me big time Smeagol vibes. Yes. This is giving me, if you told me this was a Andy Serkis CGI or rather motion capture character, I would believe you. I love that this kid threatens Russell Crowe
By saying, I'm going to make you cum. Yeah. And you're going to like it. And that's going to fuck you up more than anything. He says, I'm going to fuck you. And I'm going to make you cum. This little kid is saying all of that to a priest. Finally, the kids get revenge. Seriously.
And just so you know, I had to, I got my hair blown out for you all. So you're welcome. You're very welcome. That's great. But I had my little earbuds in, Beats, the Beats buds. And I, but she had, she had to like get in and do some work. And I said, oh, I'll take them out. And so the Bluetooth disconnected. I was watching the movie while I was getting it on this scene. And I just sat and watched and she watched. And then I, I made no mention of it and then put them back in.
And continued to watch. It was very strange.
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You know what this movie, I was in the middle of this movie and I realized what it reminded me of structurally or the type of movie it is. Like, and genre wise, it's not like that, but it is a horror version of National Treasure.
Because it's just about finding secret rooms and maps and decoding puzzles and finding secret elements to then do a thing. I was like, this is like fucking national treasure. Imagine if this series of movies met up with Nicolas Cage. But see, my big complaint, and honestly my only complaint, is that this movie had the most...
like just disappointing ending there. What do you mean? What do you mean? What part? You mean like the battle was disappointing or the battle was really disappointing. I thought the last scene in the 199 scene. Yeah. Yeah. That was wonderful.
Although even that was a little disappointing because I was like, did they really just suggest we're going to watch 199 of these? That's like the way that like My Name is Earl, like when a TV show is like, well, you have 500 more people to apologize to. That's our seasons, you know. Honestly, though, give me one of these a week and I'm happy. But then they tell us almost immediately after that, that this man has died.
Who? Father Crowe. Oh, oh, oh, oh. The person it's based on. The person it's based on. So I'm like, there's no way we're getting, there's no way from this point on he was able to accomplish 199. Oh, June. Hold on. Oh, boy. Uh-oh. I'll read you something right here. The number of exorcisms performed by
Russell Crowe's character, Friar Amaroth, vary depending on who he's reporting to. He has claimed at times over 100,000 exorcisms over his career. Hang on a second. I'm going to need to figure that out. How many days in a year? Wait.
So I'm assuming some of these were mass exorcisms for large groups of people. Oh, like we needed to exorcise the entire audience. Sure. Yeah, exactly. Or like maybe over an entire, like, yes, concert. Right, right, right. Well, he goes on to say, when questioned by skeptics, he claimed that a person could be possessed with upwards of a thousand demons. And, and...
He measured each prayer and write in the exorcism as a singular exorcism. Okay. So he's gaming the system. These numbers are, yeah, a little slated. Therefore, possessed people might require tens of thousands of exorcisms to be healed.
Okay. This is ridiculous. But here's my question. I could not quite understand what happened between him and that woman. He did not help. Oh, my gosh. That's her name. That's my favorite moment of that. She comes over, remember me? I'm the woman you let die. Like,
Like, yeah, we got it. You're not the ghost of Christmas past. Like, if I let you die, I'm like, you don't have to underline it for me. But what's crazy is Russell Crowe's having this moment with this woman that he let die in, these memories and everything. But everything she's saying from the other priest's point of view is coming from an 11-year-old boy. Understood. But was she possessed? Possessed?
He says no. He says she had mental illness that he, in his pridefulness, didn't pass on to someone else. He didn't take care of her. But I don't know that he was credentialed to take care of her. I think it would have been inappropriate for him to take care of her. Well, that's the whole thing. But he is the Pope's exorcist. But he doesn't, he's like. I see him once a week for 90 minutes.
He is. But that's his whole M.O. His M.O. is he's like a bad cop. So when he gets called in, like, Father, get the fuck in here. And he's like, what? He's like, you shouldn't be killing pigs. And he's like, hey, come on. Tomas, Gabriel, in my office right now. Yeah. And that's his whole thing. It's like, I answer, you got to talk to my boss, the Pope. Okay.
There are multiple scenes where there's an action-packed something happening. And the thing that we cut to on the other side is the Pope reading a book from the 1400s or whatever that is redacted. I know. Like the State Department really? It's a redacted, illuminated manuscript. Manuscript?
Can someone give him a desk? Yeah. He's sick. Let the Pope stand. Yeah. I mean, sit. Let him sit. Let him sit on a Friday night. By the way, I'm also realizing that this movie also works by the rules of Rumpelstiltskin.
Which is, if you can get the demon to say his name, he's out. Like, don't trick me. Russell Crowe treats all demons like, you little scamp.
Like, all you gotta do is, yeah, Rumpelstiltskin or Mr. McSixaplex. Just get him to say his name backwards and he goes back to his dimension. And he does these things, like, he is non-pussed by demons. He sees it all the time, obviously. He's got his little tool kit. The most uncomfortable I've seen Russell Crowe in this entire movie is after the long Vespa ride where he just pulls up on the side of the house to wash his pits. His dirty little pits over there. Like...
I go, what is this? Actors choice. I guarantee that's another Russell Crowe choice. This movie is rotten with lines and character beats that for sure are all him. I remember Darren Aronofsky telling a story once about every day he would have to go up to Mickey Rourke and take sunglasses out of his pockets because he would fill his wardrobe with sunglasses that he would mid-scene pull out and put on.
Because he thought the character would wear sunglasses? What's so funny about this? He won an Oscar! For a movie he was actively sabotaging.
What's so funny about this movie, too, is we are supposed to be on the side of fighting Satan and all, but there are times in this movie where I'm watching Catholicism play out, and I'm like, what the fuck is this? People are confessing, and the priest is like, do you feel sorry? And they're like, yeah, I do. And they're like, great, you're...
It's like they're getting the cliff notes of it. It's like, yeah, we do the big shit we do for the show. But it's also, it's the architecture
Tipple framework of the scenes we're watching are a team up of heroes against the bad guy, the demon, the whatever. But it's so funny that all of their mechanics, tools and everything else are from the church and that they have to absolve each other of sin. And quickly, quickly. I thought that all of that stuff was so wild and so interesting. I loved his little case.
Oh, yeah. He has a little medallion. I thought it was very cool when he did the thing where he's doing the... in front of Henry with his eyes, and then his eyes split in two. That was great. I thought that was dynamite. I loved that. But to your point, June, the ending is disappointing because it kind of falls into that trap that all these movies fall into, which is like, just throw some CGI shit at it, and there it happens. I know. Because it is so small. When they go... I'm adapting it to Broadway, and...
The end is going to be a little tricky, you know, to figure out how to do it. You think it should be a musical because you think Russell Crowe's band, 60-odd foot of grunts, should have done all of the music? By the way, I will tell you... I do want to talk about Russell Crowe's singing. I'm a huge fan of Les Mis, and could he sing that part? No. But he acted the hell out of it to a point where I was like, I don't care that you're not singing what is my favorite song in all of musical theater.
And that's the power of this actor. I think that's the same here. I don't, I cannot imagine this is a good Italian accent in any, he sounds like. You know what's so funny? When we played, when Paul played that clip before, I wasn't watching it and I was just listening and I thought, this doesn't sound very good. Yeah. He,
But once I've got my eyes on him, it's electric. You are drawn in. He can sell. That's the genius of Russell Crowe is he can sell. He's such a good actor in spite of true bananas level stuff like this. I mean, this accent is wild. I will say almost Mario level. Can I just say about... Let's go get the devil. Let's go. It's a me. Can I just say about the Vespas scene? Let's go.
Like there was a part of me that almost wanted to laugh when he came out on the Vespa and his priest outfit and the sunglasses. I thought it looked pretty fucking cool. And I was like, wow, this actor, man. That's it? I will laugh, but I'm not. You're telling me that's not Orson Welles? That's awesome. I mean, it really is.
It is amazing. But you're right. Something that's really nuts, I thought, which is... Okay, sorry. I interrupted you. Go ahead. Oh, no. I think that there is... You said it before. He couldn't sing that part in Les Mis, but he believed that he was singing it the best that anyone had ever sung it. And I think...
And I think that's the difference. It's like, he has no hesitation. Well, that's... And also, do we want to talk about Javert and Les Mis and that character? Because he... And I've seen every version of Les Mis. And he brought something and a new...
He brought a new take to it, you know, and it wasn't about. And so then I start thinking he sounds great. And I know he doesn't, but I can't help but think he does. It's crazy. I will tell you this. You cannot take your eyes off of him. And that's what's incredible. I hung out with Russell Crowe one night for hours. It was amazing. And the night started off.
In a crazy way, but the second thing that happened was this. He calls over a waiter. We're at a restaurant. And he goes, get up on this table and take out these lights. And the waiter just said, all right. And the waiter got on the table in a very fancy restaurant, unscrewed a light, unscrewed the other one. The table that we were eating on walked off like he got him drunk.
or something. He just said, you take out these lights, right? And the guy walked, he did like, oh yeah, we do every night. I walk on the tables and I take out the overhead lighting of this restaurant. And I watch it, I was like,
No hesitation. He is incredibly, and in every movie performance, incredibly capable at everything. In this movie, I believe they walk into the catacombs of this building. He's...
not at all phased by any of the discoveries that they make. Nope. They, he, he sledgehammers walls down. He opens wells full of skulls. They get down into like the, the, the hell mouth area. And there is a, a 500 year old desiccated corpse, shrunken up corpse. And he recognizes who it is. He goes, Oh, that's father. What's his name? The most famous, the,
The most famous exorcist in history. Talking about him like he was Michael Jordan. Oh, yeah. Yeah, this guy. He recognizes the shriveled up body. I was like, yep, absolutely. He's like, yep, that's who that is. Whatever. Are you not entertained?
I'll watch him do whatever. He cannot ruin... I mean, the movie without him, this movie is an absolute unmitigated disaster.
Unless Nick Cage is in there, in which case, give me every second of it. There's a bunch of weird choices here, too. I want to show you one thing. I know we talked about the Inquisition a little bit, and this is a visual thing. So this is the symbol of the Inquisition, right? That is the symbol. That is the true, real thing. This movie...
decided, well, we'll change that a little bit. And that became that. We're like, well, where did that come from? Oh, a video game. So, so... Wait, what? All right, so I'm going to show you. It's just from a video game called Dragon Age. They're like, yeah, we'll do that. We'll do that. That will be what we'll use instead. They ripped off a video game's
Inquisition symbol when there is a function. Wait, in the video game, it's an Inquisition-themed video game? I believe, yes. Everybody knows the video game? Jason, Dragon Age, man. Dragon Age.
Man, you got to get in the age, bro. Did they get called out for that? Because that does seem egregious. I mean, we just did it. Like, there are three elements in the real symbol, but none of them are an eye. No. That is curious that an eye has been inter... Here's what I think.
graphic designer in a different country is like Inquisition, Dragon Age pops up. I was like, got it. I don't think it was stolen. I think it was Googled. And they're like, that one looks weird. I like that one. Well, that one is, yeah, designed. That's why you like it. So I think you're right. I agree with you. It's a foreigner's fault. Hey, God damn it.
I will say that this father did have some views that were not mentioned in the film, one of which is on yoga.
And at a film festival in 2011, the character that Russell Crowe is based on said, yoga is satanic because it leads to the practice of Hinduism and all Eastern religions are based in a false belief in reincarnation. And practicing yoga is satanic and it leads to evil just like reading Harry Potter.
Wow. Boom. Hit him. I love when you can hit nine. Like you're like, okay. Ooh. Like you kind of keep on. It's like hitting all the buttons in the elevator. It's like, yeah, you're going down. I did love that this father had like a chief officer title in the Vatican. He was the chief exorcist.
Which I was like, wow, that's a real title. Well, there's a lot of people working in that building at the end of the movie. Are they all ex-well, that's the holiest of holy places. Yeah. What looks like MI5...
What could be going on there? From the James Bond movies. Not even like, it looks... All I want is the cue to come out and be like, this crucifix also does this. Well, did you, did anybody else think in the scene, in the scene that you were complaining about, June, where the not very exciting final battle, the two priests are battling and there's all this back and forth and they've got, one of the priests has a medallion and one has the cross and
Did it sound to you like the cross made gun sounds? Yes. There was a lot of tossing the guns like they were in Bad Boys or something. And it was like, grab and go. But it was not like, bam, bam, bam, bam. It was like, and cross. But I felt like it was making the clankety-clank sounds of a gun or something. It felt like that's how they wanted it to come across, like they were badasses. There was definitely like a...
Yeah, it definitely had a much more metallic sound to it. And I guess you do need to add, this is an action movie. It's a cop movie. Well, that's it. That's what's so crazy is you think it's going to have all those hallmarks of the shootout at the end, but instead it's crosses, holy water, and
And the movie makes such an interesting decision to pair him with Tomas and not the mother. And so then we're sort of on this journey with Tomas, who I never cared about.
You know, and I was like... The panty sniffer. How did he not die? Tomas absolutely should have died. Tomas was tossed out the fucking door. Like, I was like, yeah, that's good. Why do we need Tomas? Tomas had no journey. And also, like, the love of a mother, which we're told is the closest humans can experience to the love of God, the father... Wait, is that true? That's what the movie said. But I'm like, the love of a mother did not do much in this scene.
Like, it didn't do... There was nothing called... Like, she just talked to her son after he was already depossessed. Nothing happened from her love. The family is irrelevant. Yes. Truly, like, they... And I didn't have any attachment to them. I was like, they can stay or go. Like, they don't mean anything to me. I don't care if this daughter kills her mom in front of my very eyes. Like, I felt so...
Disconnected from them. But that's the thing is like he is he and even like the criticism levied against him is that he is too prideful and full of ego. And then he is. He's basically like a gunslinger who's like, I'm the only one who can save this boy. Get out of here. Like the exorcist is about a family is about this happening to Reagan and her mom. You know, this is like, you don't matter. You're just like, we're just going to go. But unless you can also be possessed. Yeah.
I liked it when the siblings were speaking in unison. That was awesome. I thought that was great. There was a bunch of creepy stuff I thought really worked. Let's go to the crowd. Let's see if anyone here has any ideas. Maybe can shed some light on things that we don't know, things that we talked about. I'd also love to know if anyone knows if the Catholic Church is still performing exorcisms. I think the answer is yes. The answer is yes. Okay, yes. Go ahead. Hi. I just thought it was so strange when shit was going crazy that the mother was like, I'll go to sleep.
And she's in another room. And then the daughter or the sister is sharing just the room like next door and she's sleeping. I'm like the priest. It was over 24 hours. Everybody was up, but the mother who was freaked out and the sister, I don't understand. I also thought it was, yeah, it was wild. And I, I did have the thought cause I had, I was in the middle of watching this movie and I walked upstairs and Paul did one of the, the crazy possessed voices and,
And in that moment, I thought, honestly, if a child of mine was possessed, I would absolutely leave. I would not. I don't know. I would not engage. See, but this is where June and I differ because I believe, like I said earlier, I'm treating this person like a carpet cleaner. It's like, I don't need to be over them and looking like, oh, how you clean the carpet? I'm like, okay.
I'll trust you. I'll go in the other room. I'll make a sandwich. And honestly, there'd be no part of me that would be like, oh, it's Henry though. I'd be like, you're the devil and I'm gone. Like, I have not confused for one. I will say that I've seen June get out for lesser things.
Like, the thought of it being possessed. I've seen you go like, we're out. We're done. You made us leave a hotel one time because you got bad vibes. You're like, we're out. A thousand percent. I felt like if a priest showed up at my house talking like he was talking, I would push back a step. I would be like, hang on a second. Wait, what are you saying? Like, he's like, very powerful demon. Yeah.
Has possessed your son. Very, very powerful demon. Of course, I'm an Italian gentleman. Very powerful demon. And she's like, uh-huh. What? I mean, what? Jason, if you're a child, and we haven't even talked about the scene where he, the first time we hear that voice is when he grabs his mom's breast and says, you didn't breastfeed me as a baby.
Baby Hungry or something like that. Wait a second. I was like, what the fuck? That's my favorite scene in the movie. Do we think that maybe that's where the mother's love didn't come into play? Again, that's all I would need to hear is Baby Hungry and I'd be like, I'm gone. That's the t-shirt. I'm gone. I don't know you. Baby Hungry with an arm like this. Baby Hungry. I'll be the only one buying that t-shirt.
What's your question? So two things. One, Russell Crowe absolutely sounds like Puss in Boots. Oh, yeah. And two, so Friar as conduit for the devil speaking to Isabel and Ferdinand are basically saying that the founding of the new world was brought about by the devil. Is he trying to make a comment on... Wow. By the way, great point.
I don't think, I didn't realize that. Basically, the devil discovered America. It sounds like it. I didn't put it together. That's a really astute point. I think that's leading as the best question of the night. Did the movie just get better? Basically, America is the devil country. Yeah. Yeah, founded by the devil. He's our founding father. That's why I don't. It is heating up. All right, yes. Oh, boy. Yeah, what do you got here? What do you got here? Reach a little bit to me. Here we go.
Okay, so not to lay on with more mom shame of the mom, but I believe that the mother's love never really came into play because when Father Tomas is like, oh my God, I'm so sorry for your loss. Your husband died. She's like, oh my God, it's okay. I know, it's the weirdest.
She said, it's cool. It's cool. It was the weirdest. I was like, no. I'm so glad you brought that up. It was very, very strange. I also freaked out at that. Fast forward, we see that the son witnesses his dad get impaled through the skull. And to rewind, her reaction was, oh, it's cool. Keep in mind, it's the 80s.
She basically is like, it's no big. It is not a big deal at all. I was like, oh, is she going to flirt with the priest? No. Oh, it's fine. I'm single. Very strange. She's into house flipping now. By the way, double. If your son witnesses your husband's impaling and death, don't move him to a castle in Spain and be like, figure it out. Talk soon, please.
Honestly, and I was also like, did she not have any insurance? Did they not have anything planned for this? Maybe she was responsible for it. I mean, oh, wow. Now that's interesting. You know, let's just call it out. She cut the brakes? Two quick things. Why were the doctors in Spain speaking Italian?
I mean, look, I think across the board, this is a very multilingual movie. Everyone is speaking every language at any point. But yes, that's a good point. And by the way, this movie's shot in Ireland.
Okay, I guess I forgot that this was based on a true story because I was convinced that both Father Amorth and Padre Escobar were possessed when they were in the Vatican. And I was waiting for the demon eyes to come out. At the very end, you mean? Oh, that would have been great. I thought that would have been cool. Like a thriller ending? Yeah. Not a thriller, but a Michael Jackson thriller ending. I thought the Pope was going to be possessed.
And that's why he'd suddenly gotten healthy was that he had the power of the demon and was healthy now. And the setup was they were going to have to get him in the next movie. But no. They're just James Bond. So two quick things. One is June asked if the Catholic Church still performs exorcisms. And according to this website, it has grown exponentially. Okay.
So in 2005 in the United States, there were 12 Catholic priests doing exorcisms. Now they're around 150. I can see a world in which, because nobody's becoming a priest anymore. I can see a world in which if there brings them in a thousand percent, I agree because I think it's not sexy to just be a regular priest in today's world. We got a bad rap.
But if you're an exorcist, now you're in showbiz, baby. All right. Tim also has his own question, not just to follow up to June's thought. Go ahead.
The woman who kills herself that's like plaguing Russell Crowe. You guys said that that was just mental illness, but it seemed like something more was going on there. There was like the bird connection. I thought so too. When she landed on the cobblestone, the blood spatter was like angel wings. And then when the demon is torturing Russell Crowe as her...
It's like, do you remember? Do you believe me now? Do you believe me now? So is the sin not saving her or is the sin not believing that she gets fucked by the devil every night? Oh, my gosh. This guy's got an answer. This guy's got an answer. So there were rumors. He does reference that there were rumors of sexual abuse. So I didn't. We have we have a very adamant person here.
Yeah, June was saying that there was people in the Vatican that were obviously fucking this woman. Priests, correct? Priests. She was saying, the person that comes to me at night looks like you.
Right. Yeah, she said that. She sure did. It's not that it's him, but it looks like you like a priest. Right, right, right. Okay. Yep, that makes sense. Doing the business. So, okay. So now I understand. It's all in the text. It's all in the text. The whole audience is like, oh. Yeah. I told you, everybody holds one piece of this movie. Tonight's audience is a raw emotional nerve.
Oh, wow. Everyone has revealed something as if we all did not have the same communal experience. I know, but that is, so now I'm understanding, just to say it again, that is what was haunting him, that he didn't believe this woman who was being sexually abused. All right. That's a fair haunting. Wow, it's a good haunting. Okay, yes, your question.
I just wanted to know if anybody else noticed. So you mentioned it was filmed in Ireland, which we sort of thought because it looked Irish. And then we noticed that the supposed library that's supposedly in Rome is really obviously Trinity College Longroom Library. And you can see the Brian Boru harp in multiple shots, which is like the symbol of Ireland. It's on Guinness' logo. And it's real, real obvious. So...
Well, they spent their CGI budget on the last scene, so they couldn't go and erase that other stuff. Hang on a second. That harp might be in possession of the Vatican. Well, there you go. Wow. Wow, this is really a breakthrough. We've learned way more than I thought we would. Yeah, we really did. Everything was an education. But you know what? There is going to continue to be an education here as we hear what other people had to say, because now it is time for Second Opinions.
I'm Mark. Connor. I already hate it. Have you ever met a girl that you tried to date, but her eyes are all red and now she's filled with hate? Let me tell you a story about my situation. I was talking to this girl in the Vatican Nation. Oh, baby, you, you got what I need. But you say I'm just a demon. But you say I'm just a demon.
Osmodeus, you, you puked up a bird. But you say I'm just a demon. But you say I'm just a demon. So Paul calls Amazon at this time. I thought leaving a five-star review wouldn't be no crime because I leave great reviews, and that's a fact. When the boy grabbed his mom's tits, that shit was whack. Amazing. Give it up. Wait a minute. Stay there. Stay there one second.
Stay there one second. Give it up for these guys. All right. There are 13,952 reviews. That seems to be a record for what we do on this show. 13,952 total reviews. 13,952.
63% are five stars. And will you, Paul, will you remind, this came out like a month ago? Yeah. It came out just a little while ago. It came out April 6th, 2023. Yeah, but that's amazing. Yep. It has an 81% audience score. 81%. And this average, the average is a 4.3. All right. So the reviews are great. From DodgerGirl67.com.
This is not your average Exorcist movie. It led me to learn more about leading Exorcists, and I did actually purchase some of the father's books. The movie was fantastic, so fantastic, I watched it five times within a week. Cinema photography was awesome, and the use of Italian language mixed with English was very easy to follow.
That is true. Five stars. Great movie. Valerie Bickle writes this. Travis's sister? Being an ex-Catholic, this was awesome. It's surprising what people don't know. Movie night. Title is Wow. I like that one. You read that one almost as if it was a poem. Laughter
Allura writes, even being biased about being Russell Crowe, because he's going to be my next ex-husband, when we finally meet Nall, this movie is riveting. It's scary because the exorcist the movie was made about was a real exorcist. And while the movie story itself is all Hollywood and flair, the movie reminds us that there is
True evil out there and they're waiting for the humans to screw up and open themselves to it Effects were great, especially the young boy and my man Russell A rugby team and sings I am a sucker for music
Wait, is this review from Tinder? Leaves you wanting more. I do feel I could have written this. Like, this is so crazy, but also like, yes. Yeah, that part's right. The movie is a big hit. Budget was $18 million. It grossed $76.5 million worldwide.
Huge. Huge. And 20 here in the States. And there's a sequel coming, people. There is a sequel coming. Wonderful. And you know that I'm working on my Italian accent. Oh, no. It's great news. A father, a Martha. Pizza the devil. And for those of you who didn't stay for the post-credit sequence. Oh, wait. That includes me. They pop up a picture of the OG poster.
And there we go. Is there something in his nose? There does look like there's a boogie in there. Or maybe it's a deviated septum. I'm not sure. It's a devil. It's just hair. It's just a bunch of gray hair in his nose. Nothing wrong with that.
It is the devil. All right. Wow. The devil's nose hair. I feel like that's a cocaine code. Do you have any of the devil's nose hair? Well, another reason for the strike to be over. Somebody says he doesn't know cocaine terms. I'm looking for some devil's nose hair. What? How old are you?
Oh my gosh. Jason June, would you recommend this movie? A thousand percent. Yes.
Give me all the rest of them immediately. I can't wait to watch the sequel. I kind of want this to be like, it should be a television series where we can get one a week. I do really want it. I would love it. I would love it. The way that they are doing The Equalizer as both a TV show starring Queen Latifah and a movie series starring Denzel Washington, give me the same. Give me Russell Crowe in the movies and, I don't know, Liev Schreiber on the TV show also playing Italian. Yeah.
Father. Come on. I agree. We must have Italian listeners in Italy or here. Italian listeners, please weigh in. Let us know. It was fantastic. It was a little a dente to do, but they pulled it off. And I love that he's like, do you know any jokes? The devil hates jokes. Yeah.
Thank you for coming out. This has been How Did This Get Made? You all are fantastic.
I think tickets are still available. I hope they are for your sake. That's October 20th, just in case. I don't know when you're listening to it. And tomorrow, October 21st, we are going to be in Brooklyn, not to mention that we are going to be in Chicago and Minneapolis in November on the 8th, 9th, 10th, and 11th. Get your tickets now at hdtgm.com. Now, I also want to direct your attention to another big live show on 1025. We are doing a giant show.
charity show at the Orpheum downtown. I'm talking Jack Black, Jeremy Allen White, Little Dicky, uh, myself, June Diane Raphael, Rachel Bloom, Janelle James, Nicole Byer, oh my, Simon Helberg, uh,
Oh my gosh, Lily Tomlin. I can't even remember, but all of this is a big variety comedy music stand-up comedy. Oh, Ray Romano, Pat Nossel. All these people are getting together to raise money for our crew who've been out of work for the strike. Tickets are affordable. And here's the thing. I'm going to give you a special code right now. You can actually put this in the little lock box right up there. The code is...
If you put in the code solidarity, you will get your second ticket half price. So one ticket full price, one ticket half price. That's
$75 for two tickets. It's a great cause. Head on over to Ticketmaster right now. Also, if you want to just keep on spending, and I know you do, we do have a Pope's Exorcist show shirt. You can check it out at the TeePublic store, which is teepublic.com slash stores slash HDTGM. I love it. It's Russell Crowe on a Vespa, and the tagline is
exercise. There we go. And next week on Last Looks, we will be going over your corrections and omissions. So if you want to talk about the movie, get something off your chest, leave me a voicemail at 619-Paul-Ask or write a comment on our Discord at discord.gg slash HDTGM. And of course, as always, Jason will stop by for a chat and we'll announce our next movie. And by the way, if you
on the lookout for a brand new theme song. And if you're a musician and you have what it takes to record a new earworm, send your theme song submissions to how did this get made at earwolf.com. Post them on our discords theme song channel. Remember, you can find us everywhere online at HDTGM. If you love the show, tell your friends.
It helps. It really does. Word of mouth helps us. It's a lot more fun than watching these bad movies alone. Watch them with a buddy. And last but not least, I got to say thank you to all the listeners who support this show every single week and our entire behind-the-scenes team who keeps this show running. I'm talking about our producers, Scott Sonney, Molly Reynolds, our movie-picking producer, Avril Haley, our engineers, Casey Holford and Rich Garcia, and our associate producer, Jess Cisneros, who makes all the
our amazing social media videos. That's all I got, people. And we'll see you next week on Last Looks. Until then, bye for now. I'm just gonna... Hero!
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