cover of episode Contracts of Love & Money That Make or Break Relationships | James Sexton

Contracts of Love & Money That Make or Break Relationships | James Sexton

2025/5/5
logo of podcast Huberman Lab

Huberman Lab

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People
A
Andrew Huberman
是一位专注于神经科学、学习和健康的斯坦福大学教授和播客主持人。
J
James Sexton
Topics
Andrew Huberman: 我认为婚前协议可以加深伴侣间的感情和信任,帮助建立安全感,避免冲突和误解。大多数签署婚前协议的人婚姻持续时间更长,这表明婚前协议并非不浪漫或悲观。 我对合同的看法是,合同能让人感到安全和安心,我喜欢规则和指导方针。我认为婚姻是一种经济体和契约,在充满乐观和信任的时候制定婚前协议很有价值。在发生冲突之前学习如何处理冲突非常重要,双方需要讨论各自的价值和贡献,了解彼此的优点和缺点,并互相补充。 我认为婚前协议可以帮助双方更深入地了解彼此,并加深彼此的联系。婚前协议可以提高婚姻成功的概率,因为能够讨论和协商婚前协议的人通常也能成功维持婚姻。 我认为大多数人对婚前协议的误解在于,他们认为婚前协议只关注婚姻的结束,而忽略了它对婚姻成功的积极作用。 我认为婚前协议可以帮助双方更深入地了解彼此,并加深彼此的联系。婚前协议应该更易于获得,并以更积极的方式看待。 我认为,如果无法进行坦诚的对话,就不应该结婚。婚前协议应该关注如何让双方在关系中感到安全和被爱。 James Sexton: 我认为婚前协议能加深伴侣间的感情和信任,帮助建立安全感,避免冲突和误解。大多数签署婚前协议的人婚姻持续时间更长,这表明婚前协议并非不浪漫或悲观。 社会对离婚男女的看法不同,女性通常在争取子女抚养权方面更努力,这可能与社会对母亲身份的认知有关。社会对男性和女性出轨的评价不同,男性在离婚时更容易表现出愤怒,而女性则更具宽容性和报复性。离婚律师会看到好人最坏的一面。大多数离婚都与不忠有关,但背后往往有更深层次的原因。 我认为,每个人都有婚前协议,要么是政府制定的,要么是双方共同制定的。在充满乐观和信任的时候制定婚前协议很有价值。在发生冲突之前学习如何处理冲突非常重要,双方需要讨论各自的价值和贡献,了解彼此的优点和缺点,并互相补充。 起草婚前协议能帮助双方更好地了解彼此的恐惧和希望。婚前协议应该更易于获得,并以更积极的方式看待。 如果无法进行坦诚的对话,就不应该结婚。婚前协议应该关注如何让双方在关系中感到安全和被爱。 签署婚前协议的人离婚率很低,能够讨论和协商婚前协议的人通常也能成功维持婚姻。 我认为婚前协议可以提高婚姻成功的概率,因为能够讨论和协商婚前协议的人通常也能成功维持婚姻。 离婚律师的工作是帮助人们处理高度情绪化的状态。对婚姻的态度往往是代代相传的。

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Shownotes Transcript

My guest is James Sexton, Esq.), a renowned attorney specializing in contracts related to love and money—prenuptial agreements, divorce and custody. We explore the counterintuitive fact that people with prenuptial agreements tend to stay married longer and report more satisfying relationships than those who don’t. We discuss how legal contracts can foster deeper understanding by encouraging vulnerability and honest communication about each partner’s values and expectations.

We also examine what defines true, lasting love versus generic romantic ideals—and how social media can distort our understanding of what we truly need. Additionally, we review how cultural traditions, gender dynamics, courtship length, and age at the time of marriage shape marital outcomes.

This episode offers practical tools for anyone—single or partnered—to build more successful and stable relationships through deeply honest dialogue and contracts that reflect genuine values around love and money.

Read the episode show notes at hubermanlab.com).

Thank you to our sponsors

AG1: https://drinkag1.com/huberman) Wealthfront**: https://wealthfront.com/huberman) BetterHelp: https://betterhelp.com/huberman) Our Place: https://fromourplace.com/huberman) Function: https://functionhealth.com/huberman)

**This experience may not be representative of the experience of other clients of Wealthfront, and there is no guarantee that all clients will have similar experiences. Cash Account is offered by Wealthfront Brokerage LLC, Member FINRA/SIPC. The Annual Percentage Yield (“APY”) on cash deposits as of December 27,‬ 2024, is representative, subject to change, and requires no minimum. Funds in the Cash Account are swept to partner banks where they earn the variable‭ APY. Promo terms and FDIC coverage conditions apply. Same-day withdrawal or instant payment transfers may be limited by destination institutions, daily transaction caps, and by participating entities such as Wells Fargo, the RTP® Network, and FedNow® Service. New Cash Account deposits are subject to a 2-4 day holding period before becoming available for transfer.

Timestamps

00:00:00 James Sexton

00:02:19 Divorce & Breakups, Men vs Women, Perception; Infidelity

00:12:04 Sponsors: Wealthfront & BetterHelp

00:14:41 Contracts, Business, Marriage Celebration, Prenups

00:26:24 Nesting; Prenups, Creating Rulesets

00:33:56 Prenups & Strengthening Marriage

00:38:19 Marriage Traditions; Divorce Rates, Religion

00:44:44 First vs Second Marriages, Love & Impermanence

00:50:09 Sponsors: AG1 & Our Place

00:53:53 Contracts, Relationships & Hard Conversations

01:02:37 Marriage & Underlying Problems, Love, Successful Marriages

01:16:27 Ideals, Social Media & Advertising, Simplicity, Dogs

01:27:33 Sponsor: Function

01:29:26 Intimacy, Tool: Early Framework for Hard Discussions

01:37:06 Prenup Consultation, Legal Defaults, Reasons for Marriage

01:47:37 Alimony, Prenups & Creating Rulesets, Yours, Mine & Ours, Adultery, Pets

02:02:30 Fond Memories & Ending Relationship, Pain, Divorce

02:12:49 Social Media, Movies & Ideals, Pornography vs Real Sexual Relationships

02:22:43 Revealing Flaws, Bravery, Prenups & Expectations, Money

02:37:49 Bravery, Vulnerability, Relationship Changes, Men vs Women, Marriage

02:47:11 Relationship Sacrifices, Men & Women; Prenups, Government

02:54:45 Life Milestones, Early vs Late Marriage, Navigating Challenges

03:01:38 Courtship Period & Marital Outcomes

03:10:12 Knowing Self & Partner, Vulnerability

03:16:58 "Postnup", Rekindling or Ending Relationships, Tool: Leave a Note

03:26:41 Heartbreak & Love, Divorce; Acknowledgements

03:34:45 Zero-Cost Support, YouTube, Spotify & Apple Follow & Reviews, Sponsors, YouTube Feedback, Protocols Book, Social Media, Neural Network Newsletter

Disclaimer & Disclosures)