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It's I Do Part Two. I'm one of your celebrity mentors, Jen Fessler from The Real Housewives of New Jersey and the podcast Two Jersey Jays. And I am once again joined by my dear friend, fellow mentor and Housewives alum, Kelly Ben-Simon. Hi, Kel. Hi. And today we have an incredible guest. You guys have watched her. It's true. It's true. She's giggling, but she knows it's true. You guys have watched her for years on The Real Housewives of Orange County, where she is so loved.
She has loved and she has lost, and now she's opening up herself to love again on Bravo's Love Hotel. Of course, we are talking about the one and only Shannon Shut the Door B'Door. Wow. Shut the Door B'Door. Hi, Shannon. Hi, how are you? We're so happy to see you. Yellow's the vibe. Jen did not get the memo. It's fine. No, no, no, no.
Yes. Both of these beautiful women are in yellow. And, yeah, we are so excited. Kelly and I keep talking about the fact that we are expectations for Love Hotel for whatever reason. Maybe because there are so many dating shows going on.
Love Hotel has far exceeded my expectations. Kelly, you say the same thing. 100%. And also, I was on a dating show. And you guys, first of all, you look like you're having so much fun. You are having so much fun. Yes, it was fun. We had Ashley on. I love her so much. You're obviously with Luann and Giselle, who is drop-dead gorgeous. So you guys are having the best time. And then you have all your friends come on as well. And then you have all these...
different things that happen, you know, episode to episode that are so good.
It's really great. It's fun. It's fun to watch. Yeah, it's really fun. And you look gorgeous. Oh, thank you very much. No, really. I'm not really big with the compliments. You look really, really, really spectacular. Thank you. Yeah, well, I can tell you that. First of all, the place, I love Grand Velas. That hotel is beautiful. Oh, you've been there? I've been there. I've been there. They have three different locations. It's an all-inclusive. That's all we used to go to with our kids because they're great.
Gavones. I think that is the expression. I'm a gavone, I should say, also. But anyway, a gavone, when you just eat, they just eat. They have no concept. When they were little, like, oh, I'll have a virgin mudslide. And like each virgin mudslide is, you know, $15. Oh, my God. So we decided on all-inclusive. It's so much better. But anyway, this is not about my kids. Yes. But we want to talk about what's going on over there. And I am...
dying to know secrets. I know you're probably not gonna be able to disclose, but what's how, what happened with Earl? Wait, before we talk about what happened with Earl, can I just, can I just set the stage? If you have not watched Love Hotel, you have to watch Love Hotel because the way that you come across on Love Hotel is spectacular. Oh. And I really want to know what happened with Earl. We definitely want to know that. But before we get into that, why did you want to go on Love Hotel? Well,
Well, you know, I was asked to go a couple months before, and I think I replaced somebody. So I wasn't in the initial cast. But I got a DUI, and it was a really difficult year for me. And so I made a vow to focus on myself, and I didn't date. And I'm a relationship girl. Like, I'm usually not single and not a big dater. And so I...
I thought this is kind of like perfect timing. It's been a year. I've been single for a year. And let me try. What I thought, too, is like, OK, who am I going to meet that's going to want to be in a television show? I've been down that road before where they say, oh, I don't want to be famous. We know all about that. So I said to myself, I'm just going to go and have fun. I really didn't expect.
to have, you know, a connection with. That's probably the best way to go into any situation if you're dating. I would say, like, is have no, expect probably to not meet anyone. Right. And expect to just make friends and then you become, everything is, the stakes are so much lower and you can relax. Right. Have a good time and,
Here we are. Well, it's insane, the friendships that I have maintained since the show. Really? The guys are really tight. They have a regular group chat. Oh, really? Yeah, I think once a month. You could see that. They were really... Yeah, the first eight guys, they call themselves the Elite Eight.
Wow, really cute. So I see quite a few of them. And the girls, especially. We have this bond. You know, we called it a little bit of a social experiment because we didn't really know what we were walking into, you know, being the first season. Did you know the girls? Of the show. Well, before? So I did Project Runway with Giselle and Luann. And, of course, we've met through the years. Right. And I met Ashley briefly. So...
We really enjoyed each other. We supported each other. We laughed a lot. We have a great bond. I think that was part of it. It was so refreshing to see a group of housewives. There was no drama. There was a little drama maybe with the guy. But there was simply camaraderie and the sisterhood. It was really cool. It was fun to watch. Thank you. It's so different than from what we see normally. I think also what I like about the show is that
We're older, so we're not just some young people. Everyone has a story. So I think there was just a little bit more story. We talked about that with Ashley. At least, I feel like we are more interested maybe in, as opposed to The Bachelor, we love The Golden Bachelor. Yes. That's a whole other topic. Love, yes. For a different episode. We did love that show. But I think that I'm loving shows about women
With dating at my age, even though, whatever, I'm not single, but, you know, it's I think that characters, quote unquote, are so much more complex and interesting.
And I'm sure that young people don't feel that way. But for someone like me and everybody I know, I love watching you come to the table with all your baggage and all of their baggage and knowing yourself so much better than we did when we were 20. One thing I thought, too, that I really loved is that you were sitting there and you said, I don't like to date. I like to be in relationships. Can you talk to that? Well, I mean, I'm going to say today I'm liking being single.
And that's, for me, that's growth because I always identified with the relationship that I was in. You know, I like only having to worry about myself right now and making choices for myself. Amen, sister. I love that. So that's kind of nice. Yeah. You know, after the Love Hotel, you know, I can't say anything. Yeah. Yes.
Well, you can as soon as the mics go off. Right, exactly. As soon as the mics go off, we're going to have like an after dark. So when you were on the show, was it like going on the show, was it like revenge for you? Or you were just like, okay, now I'm going to show everyone like obviously how great you look. Obviously, like you have the most incredible demeanor. You're like the loveliest human. Like I literally, I was like almost crying last night when I was watching you. I was like, oh my God, you're just such a giving human.
choked up. I was really impressed. So was it like a revenge for you? Were you trying to prove something? No, no. You know, Real Housewives of Orange County last season was airing when we filmed the show and
You know, it was a lot. It was hard to watch back last season for me. So it was an amazing destruction for me to be in Mexico for almost a month. Distraction, not destruction. Distraction. Yeah. So I'm not focusing on Orange County. I'm just going to have a good time. Well, I will tell you that although you weren't in it for the revenge, I feel like a lot of the viewers that love you were very satisfied by this whole experience and they experienced and they got their revenge. So you did good work.
I have to go back to that one scene again, because it's just like one of my favorite scenes where you are sitting there with Earl in your bedroom or on the couch. And, you know, it seems to the viewer that you're going to be like, here's your note. Thanks, but no thanks. Right.
And then you dropped this amazing bomb. And I just was, I just thought that the time and the effort that you put in to that was just so thoughtful. Oh, thank you. And then the dynamic changed. It was like a shift. It was like, all of a sudden it was like pivot,
Right, right. Because we were kind of in an iffy spot. And I feel bad about the vegetables comment. But anyways, but when he... Wait, why? Well, I came across a little bit harsh. And Earl and I had a banter, like we would tease each other. So in my head, when he said, I don't eat vegetables, I'm like thinking, oh, got to add that to the Earl list. You know, I... Listen, it came out, it came out like...
It was just both of you don't, at that point, didn't know each other well enough. And so the banter, no one knows who's being serious, who's being cutting. Maybe she's not, maybe he's not. And it felt like you guys just missed the mark. Well, I mean, there was much more to the conversation, but he said all he needed to do, and I explained this to him at the table, all you needed to do was lean in and say, hey, I feel like you're criticizing me. I would have said, oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to do that. And then it would have ended. Like it wouldn't have...
got to this big place. Interesting. You know, you guys were in it and out of it, though. I didn't think that I would be crying on the show, but I do a couple of times. So but that's so great, too, that you're really let your guard down. I mean, you know, again, like back to Jen's comment about being, you know, watching Real Housewives is that, you know, everyone's guard is so up.
Everyone feels like a cat in the corner, but you guys are really the camaraderie between all of you guys. The relationship with Luann, how she's befriending these guys and basically telling them what to do. I feel like you have really good advice, though. I feel like you're the advice girl. Yeah.
Well, I mean, thank you. It was when I met Earl, he was not my first choice. Wait, who was your first choice? I liked Ralph. Everyone liked Ralph. Just from seeing all of them, I was like, he's more my type. But Earl was so vulnerable and talking about how his wife had passed away and how he'd wanted to have kids. And then...
as we went on another date when Ralph didn't pick me, you know, he was talking about the stepson that he had and all he wanted to do was have children and he wasn't able to and that broke my heart. Yeah, I mean, that's very you. I've had that actually, you're in the middle of this dating show and that's what you're thinking about, right? So, which is, which is very... I don't know you, but I like love you. I love that. I'm like your, everyone knows I'm like Shannon's biggest fan. President of the fan club. I mean, I'm vice president, but...
Yes. Jessica, I know her longer. I met her at BravoCon. I know her longer. Fair. Yes. So I didn't see you with Earl when you guys...
When it first started happening, I was like, I'm not feeling this. I don't see it. I don't understand how this is. I can't see the connection. Not that it matters what I see, but I just wasn't feeling it for you guys. I wasn't either. But I will say that like— He seemed very cold. You're very warm, and he seemed very— Just so different. Just so different from you. And you guys called him simple, which I wonder if he took offense to that. By the way, Earl— I know you mean the best way, probably. Earl called himself simple all the time. He would say, I'm a simple man. And my response would always be—
I'm not a not so simple girl. Yeah. You know what, though? I will tell you this. I watched it and I thought a lot of, in a way, my own relationship because my husband is also a simple man. I hope he's not listening. He might admit it. I don't know. But he really is. He is simple. He is simple. My husband is so easy to please. So go with the flow. There's no drama. So does that mean I'm simple? Yeah.
No, it doesn't. Sorry, Cal. I have to rethink my whole philosophy. But my point is that like sometimes you need just that sort of, I think at this point in my life, if something would happen between me and my husband, I would want peace and I would want simple. I don't need, I am such a freaking mess and like in whatever, in a nice way, I suppose, but I really am a hot mess and I'm always my anxieties and my issues and
I would want a man who I could just lean on and who was a rock and solid. And I think that would attract me. You're not dating, but you're looking for a relationship and you have the most beautiful daughters. And I always say, and Jen and I say this together, is like we always judge. I don't like to judge people, but I judge mothers. Like if you have great kids, then I'm like, okay, you put the time and the effort into your children and your daughters are...
Lovely. Thank you. So well-mannered, so well-raised, so elegant, just beautiful. So they're dating, you're dating. Did you guys talk about dating at home over like Sunday dinner? Not really. No, not really. But they were horrified.
that when I said it was going to be on the show because they're like, mom, you could embarrass us. And, uh, listen, those girls have been through a lot. I mean, I could see that they are, they, they probably also want you to pick someone just for the piece of it all. Right. Right. Well, they want, I think at one point, Sophie says, um,
I want someone that will take care of my mom. Yeah, I remember that. Which is so sweet. Why am I crying today? Am I looking at a pulse or something? No, they're great. They're great girls. And, you know, I'm sure I did embarrass them. I tell them that's my job as a mother. They came on the show. I mean, they must have had, I'm sure that. They were amazing. Yeah, they were amazing. And they also put the cane and they came on though. You didn't have to, I'm assuming, been there.
What's the question? Bend their arm? Did they want to come on the show and see you there? I mean, they were approached, so they did. I have another daughter that was living in Paris. It was too far for her to come in, but I would have had all three there. So what do you think was like the best question that they asked? You know, I think it's, do you think that you could deal with my mom's world?
I remember that scene. Okay. So how do I put this tactfully? If he was the type of guy who had a six pack and was tan, would it have bothered you? Because in my view, you're on a boat, you know, everybody is takes off their shirt. And I saw that you were a little bothered and I, it's not a nice question, but I can't always be nice. So was it partially that you just, you thought that because he was an older man without, you know,
the bronzed or just not like, or you just like any man that takes his shirt off. I'm, I'm a little more buttoned up than other people. I'm pretty conservative.
So, but Ralph did have his shirt unbuttoned as well. Applause to Earl that he feels comfortable enough to have his shirt unbuttoned. I wasn't the only one commenting about it. But he was also, he had his shirt open and was dancing. I saw a little arm movement. I get it. I'm not saying that he was... Earl is a big personality. Yes. You know, and I just...
I didn't want to really do all the moves. No, listen, there's cringe. There's always a cringe fact when you're getting to know someone and you're on high alert for that. So I do absolutely get that. I think I felt it was a little cringy too, but I'm just asking you because I'm picturing if like, what's the gorgeous guy that Ashley was...
What's his name? Wale. Wale. Wale without a shirt on would have seemed very natural to me. You know what I mean? I understand what you're saying. My take was that he felt really comfortable with you at that time. And so he was just like loving life. And that's what my take was. And comfortable with everyone else and comfortable with the cameras filming it. I can't. I can't. I can't.
Oh my God. And by the way, I didn't remember doing a confessional and saying like, whatever, all the stuff that it, but making all the comments about it. I didn't, I didn't, I, you know, it's funny because when you watch back confessionals, I mean, you guys have both done it way more than I have, but I always am like,
so hard on myself and the stuff that comes out of my mind. I shouldn't have, I couldn't have, I wouldn't have. And the truth is like, I think when I'm watching, like I didn't see it as that harsh at all, Shannon, like I don't. Well,
Well, I mean, I'm just being honest. Yeah. And I appreciate that because like in all my confessionals from like day one, I was I've always been like just totally 100 percent honest. Absolutely. I'm like, if you like me or you don't like me, I'm just going to tell the truth. This is how it's right. It's funny. I think it was my third season. We had a new producer and he was asking me the questions for the confessional. And I answer right away. And then my right leg would tap. And finally, he goes, what's with the leg tap?
And the cameraman said, that's what Shannon does. And it's because I answer right off the cuff. I don't think about what I'm saying. And then afterwards, I'm like, oh, God. What did I say? Take that sentence apart. Sometimes they'll do that. Well, that's why you've been a housewife for this long. Yeah, exactly. Well, there are many reasons, but you haven't, you know, you don't edit yourself. So everyone watch out for Shannon's link tap. That's like a clue.
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Let's talk about dating advice. Who gives you the best dating advice? Is it your friends, your daughters? Who do you think gives you the best advice? I don't know because I don't really date. Relationships. I love that. I know that for me, I'm looking for someone. I don't have this laundry list of things I need. I want to be with someone that has a kind heart.
That is intelligent and funny because I like to laugh. And has strong family values. And successful. It's not we're too old. All of us. My mantra is...
I can contribute, but I cannot take on any new bodies. I love that. So, you know, I'm going to take that. No, I didn't listen. In an ideal world, I think, I mean, it'd be great. I'm sure to have the load lightened as well. Right. I mean, you carry a lot. Of course. Yeah. I mean, I've been single now for.
you know, I think eight years. So, and I take care of myself. Luann too. Luann is seven. You're eight. Yeah. Can you fathom like actually enjoying the process of dating? Like, I think if I was single right now, I could, I could enjoy it. Oh, absolutely. Like I have to tell you. You're super outgoing though. I'm not so, I mean, I'm not going with like what things I, I'm outgoing with things that I have to do, but if it's my choice of all choices, I'll be home like watching Love Hotel. Like me too. Cheering on Janet. I hear that. So would I, but like,
And maybe because I feel like I am older. And so it's like, it's probably not going to work. Let's just have a good time. Maybe we'll end up friends. Maybe you'll know someone. Maybe I'll know someone for you. That's what you gave me that advice, actually. Yeah. Good advice. Thank you. Yeah. Oftentimes give good advice. What were you going to say, Shannon? No, I mean, I just, I have never been, I don't believe I've ever been a priority.
in a relationship. So I want to be someone's priority. You know, they can of course have children, but I'd like that the children are older. That's not what you're talking about either. I'm sure you're talking about like being made to feel important. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I can completely empathize with that. And you know, you were such a beautiful mother and I'm like, I'm actually, it's getting, it's making me emotional because you are such a beautiful human and I can tell by your kids that
And, you know, I also have felt like that for so long. Like, I'm always like, I just want to be the priority. I want the person to be like, you're my person. Right. Like, I was always the wife, always taking care of everyone, always making sure everyone had everything, did everything. Right. So I completely empathize with you, and I'm sorry that you feel like that. And you're a main character. Okay.
You are a main character. Right, right, right. Thank you. I mean, it's all good. And, you know, of course, I want to grow old with a partner and be part of a team. Of course, I want that. But if I don't, you know what? My life is, I don't think I've ever been happier. Really? And I've been single. Yes. I mean, I was in such a dark place after my DUI. I didn't think...
that I would crawl out of it. And that's when I, I know I met you, Jen. It was like a month or two, two months after it was right after it happened. And you were almost considering not even going to BravoCon. You were not, they didn't want, they didn't want me to go. Okay. And I convinced them, I don't want to hide behind a rock. I want to address this head on, which is so, and, and so take accountability for what happened. And I'm again, like I, I say this all the time. There's not a day that goes by where I don't relive that day. Hey,
And thank God that I didn't hurt anyone. You know, I've learned so much about myself and I'm in a good place. So if I don't get that partner and I spend the rest of my life visiting my three girls and their future families, I'm good. Oh, no, no. We have to manifest when you get that partner. When, not it. It's like, no, no, all positive. You know what? I like I as as the new year hit, I said, I want to I'm going to continue to focus on me.
And to make for me to feel comfortable in my own skin and feel comfortable being on my own. It's a big deal for me. So do you like being alone?
I didn't before, but sometimes it's kind of nice. Welcome. Sometimes. I love being alone. No, I think that that's also part of what the good stuff that comes with aging is like. Loving yourself to be able to spend time with yourself. Yeah. But, you know, I look back. It's not necessarily alone. It's like loving yourself to like. Just like not having anybody to answer to. Right. Get the hell out of here. Even my kids. Like, they're gone. Bye. I like to just like have the house.
Do my thing on my schedule. Yeah, sleep in like, oh, I don't have to get up. Or answer to anyone. Nobody's looking at you saying, why are you sleeping in so late? Right. So who did you get along with the best? Was it Giselle, Luann, Ashley? Well, all of them. Yeah. Really, all of them. But Giselle and Ashley have known each other for years and they have this relationship. So I think that of all the women, I spent most of my time with Luann.
Great. But I love all the girls. You just had a, yeah, there was a great energy between the four of you and it was devoid of housewives, which was really, really cool. Nobody was trying to get anybody. Nobody was, right? Everybody just seemed to me, at least, like it was just love and support. And I'm actually glad that you and Luann are,
Spent a lot of time together and got along well because she is such a great wingman and she's such a great cheerleader as well. Right. She is. I'm sure she is. All of that. But we are. I'm sorry. What is going on with her? What's with the ring? Shannon. I don't know. Come on. I really don't know. I'm going to see her later this week and I'm going to ask. It's a stunner.
I can't take it. I have to know. The group chat's going. I have this Real Housewives group chat. Isn't she on it? Oh, jeez, of course she is. So what is going on, Kelly? I said I love the ring. It's a stunner. Well, Shannon's not going to tell me. You're going to tell me. I was crickets after that. I just was like, I love that ring. It's beautiful. No. Okay. All right. I don't think. No, she's not engaged.
Oh, I mean, it was great. I would think it would have been like Sarah Page. It would have been like great PR for the show. Right. She's all of a sudden wearing a ring. I mean, if I was me and I hadn't watched the show and I saw Luann walking around with the ring, I would immediately tune in. Right. Right. I mean, it's smart, but I love the one guy that she. I forget. I love Mark. Oh, Mark. Yes. Yeah. Yes. Oh, Mark. Right. Very sweet. Funny.
Yeah. From New York. You're not going to tell us? Yes. The one with the, yes. Okay. So I was with Mark last night and he told me that he asked you out on a date, Kelly. He did. Excuse me. Actually, that's incorrect. I took Luann's advice. Oh, and you. And Luann told me, she goes, Kelly, darling, when you go to a bar and you see a lot of gorgeous men, write down in a note, a little question and send it with the bartender. So I was like, okay. So I did it. And it was Mark.
He comes over. Get the hell out of here. 100%. Like literally 100%. And you went out a couple times. We went out once. He came over. He came over to me. We were talking. And then he's like, yeah.
I'm on Love Hotel. I have, you know, a bevy of children. Oh, my God. I live in da-da-da-da. I'm in real estate. My house is pink. And he's a very funny guy. On the show, though, I'm just like, what are you doing, Mark? Jesus. Well, here's a problem. Also, now that's another— He's like in his little genie pants. By the way, another spoiler alert here. In his genie pants? Because now he's gone out with Kelly.
I guess it didn't work out with Luann. Yeah. Well, next week, it'll be pretty clear. Oh, okay. So whenever this airs. Wait, don't tell me, don't tell me. I'm like super invested. No, I'm so invested. I can't believe he went out. He is so funny though when he jumped over that couch and said, I'm back. And then he fell. Yes, I love it.
It was so adorable. What about when he goes, in an interview, they're like, what do you think of Andy Cohen? He goes, who's Andy Cohen? Oh, he says the broker. Oh my God. The broker. And the outfits, the whole thing. Like that's, I don't know. But he has great hair. What about you and Mark? We're friends. You know what? And you know, I will tell you. You saved him though. You brought him back. I did. And I'm the one that gave James the key. Thank you, Luann. Yeah.
Because right now in the show, she and James are enjoying each other. Listen, I love Luann so much. Like literally, I am her ride or die. But when she and James sang, I'm just like, no, you guys. What was it? The one liner. Love Hotel. Love Hotel. Love Hotel. You know that's showing up on her cabaret. When I'm in a bad mood, by the way, if I'm... No, this is a true story. Why can't we not sing? If...
Well, I don't even remember what the tune was. I will tell you that when I'm in a bad mood and that it is oftentimes that I am, I will pick up my phone and I will go to TikTok and I will search Luann de la Sept and watch her do that cabaret. And everything is right in the world. When I see her. I love when I'm getting ready. I always do like, it's the countess speaking. I always tell myself. We did that on TikTok. We did. Yes, we did. I love watching her do that. Yes. Anyway, we. Right. Even though my name is Kelly.
So, okay, moving on. We have diverted. Let's talk about... I'm having fun. I'm loving this. I know, it actually... I could just sit here and talk to you all day. Oh, I know, I know, I know, I know. So, well, Kelly, I actually want you to take this question right now because we already spoke about you and Mark and there seems to be something going on in your life that I know nothing about. And I heard vaguely about something this morning and I'd like to get to it and maybe you could discuss it with Shannon since you ain't discussing it with me.
Jen's like, I didn't get the tea. So, again, when I just saw you in the green room and I was just saying how I was very impressed by you. And I just thought that you not only handled yourself well, but you have grace. You have a lot of grace. Thank you. I don't know if you know that, but you do. Because it seems like you don't, but you do. Well, I mean, I'm humble. I'm not good with compliments. So it's like humble and a smoke show, which was...
No, but I'm not good. You have grace. You have a lot of grace. Well, thank you. You have a lot of beautiful grace. That's a big deal for me to say thank you because I just— You want to deny it. I don't want to deny it, but I just don't want to be like— It's hard to be a big shot. Like, oh, yes. Yeah, of course I am. No, I'm not going to say that. Well, you do. That also makes you stand apart in terms of Housewives.
Oh, I can't tell you how many times I said it to Sarah today. Wish I had the ego. You and me both. Of some of these girls. You and me both, kid. Yeah. Kelly, you're not out of the hot seat. Go. But I think, again, just like that's one reason why, like, I think that I personally am very invested in your narrative because, and I do feel like you, I mean this, I do feel like you have very strong main character energy because of the things that you've gone through and the way you're handling things and the way you're moving forward. Yeah.
Just like the little things you said, like at the top when we talked about like relationship versus dating, just like the way that you speak about things has a very strong like underpinning of grace, which is beautiful.
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So I recently have been single. The reason I'm on this podcast is because I called off my wedding four days before I was supposed to get married. I remember hearing about that. There was a prenup situation. There were some other situations. And I just was like, I'm not doing that. Fortunately, I haven't seen him, heard from him, nothing, which is so great. I literally was like gone, which is amazing. And I'm actually really grateful for that. I miss his mother, but I don't miss him. That's a first. I know.
I do. I loved his mother. Oh my God, she was beautiful. Because I don't, my parents are deceased. She was just such a beautiful human. So cut to...
So on this podcast, I've been really making a concerted effort to be in therapy and also use the podcast as a way for me to apply what I'm learning. So whether that's talking about relationships, whether that's going on dates, whether that's having Jen on some of my dates. And so I've been going on a lot of dates. And I met someone who's amazing, who's a really, really great person.
And I found out from a fan that he was somewhere kissing a woman, not just kissing, but making out with a woman. And it was really, really, really upsetting to me.
How long? Granted that we're just in the early stages. How many dates have you been on with him? You know, I went with him to Miami. You know, I've gone, you know, a couple of many, you know, like probably like 10 dates. What? How do I not even? You went on a trip with him. Yes, I went on a trip with him. This was like, I went to F1 with him a couple of weeks ago. Okay. He's great. When did you find out that this happened? I found out last weekend during swim week. Right before I, right before I walked. Please tell me it wasn't Bethany. No.
Well, he did date her. He did date her. He did not. Did not.
You can't seem to get away from her. And maybe Rachel, you should tell. Oh my God. Okay. But anyway, did you have a conversation about exclusivity? Like, I don't even know. Does that happen? Or is it just like, I don't know. Well, no, that's why I'm asking you. That's why I'm trusting you. So I trust you too. Yeah. Well, I don't feel like you're out. No, I don't. I was just asking you what your thoughts are. Well, I mean, I see. That is so hurtful. I'm super sensitive. Yeah.
I'm very sensitive. That's bye-bye. Plus, I've been in relationship after relationship. I mean, every single man I've ever dated has cheated on me except for one. Well, let me ask you this. And they're open about it. They're like, oh, I just cheated on you. I'm like, that's nice for you. Oh, here's a picture of me with this girl. I'm like, that's so nice for you. Are you kidding? Oh, my God. Guys are awful with me. I'm like...
Okay, so you obviously confronted him, Kel. You obviously confronted him. I confronted him and I said, I just want to be careful because I don't know what's going on. I don't do like, you know. It's very magnanimous of you. Me, you and her. Like, I don't do that. I don't, you know, if you want to be with her, you should be with her. Like, I was very, I'm an adult.
Did you know who the girl was? No. Okay. No idea. And what did he say? And he just is like really upset. Really, really upset. Really, really upset. But, you know, the thing is too is that like dating, you know, there's two questions. So first of all, the advice of like what I should do. But the second question is how do you navigate being on a show or being well-known and navigating this brave new world of dating with these people?
fans who are incredibly loyal to me, who are just so lovely and have my back. Like you can't go anywhere because there's going to be somebody. And it's not, you know, we don't just have female fans. We have male fans too, by the way. And a lot of guys are always like, Hey, that guy's not good for you. Like, I don't know. I don't know. That also happened to me. I had a fan or a friend. I don't like to call them fans because it sounds super disingenuous, but you know, a friend who was,
literally said, I know who that person is. That person's not a good person. Not this guy, another guy. So I was just like... But yeah, but Kel, you know what? I'm not sure the answer because yes, I understand 10 dates is a lot of dates. You went away with him. Maybe exclusivity is implied. Having said that, I think that there is probably under the umbrella of, well, we never spoke about being exclusive. So it was a one-time whatever, maybe...
I don't know. I never called him my boyfriend. I never like, well, I will just say that the one difference that I had with a couple of the gals on love hotel is that like they will be intimate with a man just to be intimate for me.
it's about the person. It's about that connection. So like, I don't, I won't just have sex to have sex. Like that's, do you think that's an age thing? Cause I won't either. I won't either. So that's my, if, if, if you're intimate with, if I'm intimate with someone and I, so I don't know if you went there, but then we're, you're not seeing anybody. It's interesting. I, yeah, but I, yeah. Cause then they all were like, I wasn't an age thing. Cause I think Luann felt more free in that area. And yeah,
Yeah. I mean, Ashley was kissing both guys. But then she also freaked out when the one guy had his arms around Cynthia. Right. And that was not making out. That was we're on, you know, Love Hotel. Right. So obviously she felt like that was disrespectful. Oh, when James when James. I think it was as well. I mean, like, no, I thought that was weird. I was like, get your get your hands off my friend. Right. Yeah. Yeah.
And by the way, I was supposed to go in Cynthia's place before Cynthia. Yeah, but I had to do something with iHeart. Yeah, which was so much fun too. But yes, Luann's like, you should have come. And I was like, oh. So wait, hold on. So what's the outcome? What happened with the guy? Is he still alive? Well, this just happened. It was just two days ago, three days ago. Is he trying to contact you? Yes, sent me beautiful flowers.
What did he say? So he says, I'm done with this girl? Has he been dating her? Did he just meet her? Exactly. Was he drinking too much that day? Thank you. He was drinking a lot and it may or may not have been his ex-fiance. Now the plot thickens. Unfortunately, Kelly, I have to rethink the whole thing. I thought it was like, you're going to say, he was wasted. They were out. Well, that's why I'm trying to be the adult about it because they were together. And I said to him, if you want to be together,
you, I, I support you. Like, I'm not going to get your, and I'm not going to get in the way of someone that's not going to happen. If you have a connection with someone that's, you know, I care about him. Yes, I do have self-respect. I, I don't know what to say now. You just threw up. Plus I've been like cheated on so many times. I'm just like, what's, what's different? Like, yeah, you know what? I think maybe we should do a show on like all the cheaters together.
I think that, okay, you knowing that he was with someone and then saying that's okay. On Instagram, she was telling me this and it just was like, I was like, oh my gosh. I just feel like if you were to accept him back and continue a relationship, you're saying that's okay. Listen, I was separated for a year and a half and Shannon, I don't know if you know this, but there were infidelities in my marriage.
Coming from both of us, the first one was not for me. Having said that, here we are today, 25 years later. 26? I think we're 26. And I'm not saying that an affair is not something or...
I believe personally that it depends on the situation. And sometimes you can, I'm here to tell you, move on. Things will change. And they certainly did for my husband and I. But this kind of thing, it's still so new. He's supposed to be obsessed with you and only you. So that's why when you were talking at the beginning and I was like, oh my God, I'm going to start to cry. That's why I'm like, I want main character energy. Nobody has more main character energy than you. Get the hell out of here.
Well, anyway, I just was wanting to ask your thoughts. Yeah, I just like Jen. How many how many years were you married before? Seven. It was it was the seven year itch. It was the cliche of it all. OK, but I've been divorced for 15 and then I dated this guy for two. Got then I had to cut that off because that was not good. That was not good for me.
And so now I'm like, oh my God, is it again? Am I ever going to meet someone who just like wants to be with me? You know, when you're, when, when you try and when you, you know, start and give it your all and it doesn't work out. That's why I got so upset that Earl and I fought. I just felt like it was ruining everything. Cause you were so, also you were invested in it at this point. It's like, oh wait, this is so great. And,
what happened? Like now it's just blown up into this big ordeal. And, and it really upset me because it's like, just, you know, but you didn't get upset and talk about how upset you were. You, you pivoted and did something kind for him and change the narrative. And so that's one reason why I also think that you're a great advice person giver because you,
You know, and just like Jen was saying, it's like, you know, you're saying that, you're saying it. It's like, just because there is no right way to have a relationship or to have a marriage. There's no right way. There's no book. Do you know what I mean? There's no like...
You know, people don't have, you know, there's a lot of ways you can move in and out of that license, if you will. Although I will tell you that I have much less patience now for friends of mine, like at our age, ladies, and I think we're all about the same age, forgive me if you guys are younger than me, but I feel like
You got to be a little smarter. You got to sort of see things in a different way that you did. Like, like, oh, you know, absolutely. I mean, you have to be and I'm not saying you have to be defensive and I'm not saying that you have to overthink everything. But there are some like Kelly. This to me is a perfect example. If I that happened to me and I was let's say I was crazy about a guy when I was 25 and he had done that, I would let it go in about two seconds. I would convince myself and everyone around me that it was that he fell into her mouth.
Like that's, that would be like the narrative because I wouldn't, I would just be feel that desperation and not enough, you know, self-worth to say, wait a second, your ex fiance to get the out of here. I think now, I hope now I've come a long way from that at age 56. And I feel like you guys, we would, we have to be a little smarter now. Well, I'm 61. So if, if stop bragging, when, look at her, like when I get into a relationship, it's
I have to know that it is the right relationship because I got one more shot. You know, I'm not going to. It just I have to know. So that's not a good way to start. When you look back at your other relationships, like, do you see things now? I don't know if we're not even going to mention the names. Absolutely. But do you see that there were warning signs that you ignored? Yeah. Right from the get go. Really? But by the way, like, you know, to your point.
I'm saying, by the way, to your point, so I'm like, don't have to say anything. But to your point, when you do something, you set a precedence. Like, okay, I'm doing this. If you let me get away with it, it's like a kid. It's like, I didn't say no, I'm going to let you do it. They're going to keep doing it over and over again in different ways. They're not going to be doing maybe the same thing, but they're going to do things similar ways.
And, you know, I'm not like, oh my God, here are the rules. I just feel like you should just know. Right. But the good thing, if you want to call it good, the positive that is coming out of this, the fan reaching out to you and telling you about this,
this 10 date guy is that you found out now. Yeah. You know, cause if you, if you meet someone who's a stranger, I think it takes a good two years to get to know somebody to truly get to know who they are. So, um, you know, you can nip that in the bud, but maybe I'm just too open. Maybe I'm just, he's an asshole.
But maybe I was okay with it like at the beginning, but now it's his ex-fiance. So like, Kelly, you don't need that. But then what about the other guy that I was that, you know, it was like we had to get married. He had to get engaged. He had to do all these things. Like, what is it about not them? What is it about me that I'm not allowing? I don't have my main character, Grace Shannon. I don't know what you mean. They want to lock you down.
What do you mean? Yes. They're like, OK, you now. Good. I'm like, I'm not Jane. You can't pull me. I may or may not be wearing extensions. Like, please do not. I wish I hope that that continues for you and for Shannon. Yeah. I mean, I like for them to want to lock you guys. I would like a take charge person. Well, not pulling me and saying like we're getting married tomorrow. But guess what? You're strong enough at this point in your life to say, guess what? No, we're not getting married tomorrow.
And that's the, maybe you would have been, you know, a different person when you were even in your forties. Like, let's say like a high school musical song. Strong. You are. Yeah. Don't ever do that again. Please. I beg of you. Come on. Everyone can sing. No, not everyone. Yes. Anyway. Everyone's a singer. All right, you guys. So, all right. So anyway, Shannon, like,
Just is there any takeaway from Love Hotel, any advice you want to give to our listeners in terms of like you put yourself out there again? And which is I think, you know, that's the gift of you. But anything you'd want to, you know, impart? Well, I just think that, yeah.
As far as dating goes, you should be vulnerable and you should be honest. Like I was criticized a bit for like, why are you telling everybody that you got a DUI? Because it's part of me. Let's just get it out of the way. I love that. I just love that. That is the key. I think one of the keys to being successful on Housewives also, you got to own your shit. You can't.
But it's interesting because I was raised to like not talk. Oh, you don't talk about anything. Everything's fine. Everything's perfect. It's all great news. You know, oh, you want to hear the good news? It's like my father would say, want to hear the good news? Want to hear the great news? It was always great, great, good, good, good, good. There was no bad. There's something. Oh, my God, that's that's no, no, no, no. We don't talk about that. Yeah.
I actually sat down with Earl and I brought him up to my room and I played him clips from The Real Housewives of Orange County. Cool. So he would have kind of an understanding of, I showed him the, there's the door.
Shembadour, Shembadour. Yeah, I showed him that scene. And he was like, you've got to be kidding me. Well, that wasn't embarrassing for you. That was just funny. Yeah. Yeah. But I showed him that and a couple others. And, you know, he kind of got it a little bit. It was just so refreshing for us to have the men not like none of them had seen the housewives before. So that was really nice. They were getting to know us for us.
The guys were great. The guys were really great. I really hope. I don't know. I know you're not going to tell me, but we're still waiting on the last episode. I really hope you guys, even if it's not romantic, end up being friends and having some relationships. I did really grow to love the two of you together. Yeah, I can't wait to hear what's going on. It was very sweet. I will say that there is one of the ladies of the four that is still dating someone. Luann! Luann!
Holy shit. You heard it here first. No. No. I know. They're all nodding their heads at me. No. No. No. Don't say no. Just say maybe someone on the show. I can figure it out. I can figure it out.
Shannon, I would like to be you. Giselle. I love that guy. I love Giselle. Me too. He's so chic. I'm trying to read her eyes, you guys, but she's giving me nothing. I love Giselle too. She's so gorgeous. Shannon is an ice queen. Oh, God. She's not letting it go. I know. Tell us. Tell us. Tell us. She's too strong. We can't break her. All right. Three more? Wait, I have to ask one more question. I have to ask one more question. Kissing on camera and how was that?
You know what? Like at a certain point, you know, you just forget that microphone is on your back and that you've got cameras. I forgot that they have those robotic cameras in the room. So Earl and I did have like a little makeout session, but I don't think I've seen it yet. I don't remember seeing it. I do, and I remember very well the makeout sessions because I can't stand on TV when you hear the noises. I'm sorry. I love Ashley, but he was like...
The one, the lizard guy. I was like, oh my God. I was like, right. The one, the lizard kissing or something. Yeah. I was like, whoa. Yeah. Not, nothing against him. He's very good looking. Oh my God. No, no, he is very good looking, but just like the, I'd be like, oh my God, you scare me. I'd be like, if you're with Ashley Darby, you're going to, too. Right. I mean, it's hard not to do something else with Ashley Darby. No, maybe not with the volume. I don't know. It was funny because, um, after my first date with Earl, we,
We were at the elevators and you're not supposed to be alone, you know, not on camera. And we, he kissed me and we got in a little bit of trouble. Yeah. Because it wasn't on camera. Wow. Well, I love that he did it off camera though. Me too. I think that's cool. Take charge. Yeah. Take charge. Take charge. All right, guys. Well, we love you. We love you guys. You're amazing. You're amazing. Look at us all. We're all so amazing. We're so amazing. Sarah, Andrew.
Are you like Shannon and ready to open yourself up to love again after divorce? We can help you point you in the right direction. Email us or call us. Follow us on socials. Make sure to rate and review the podcast. I do part two and I heart radio podcast. We're falling in love is the main objective.
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