191. “My wife doesn't respect me because she earns 5x more”
I Will Teach You To Be Rich
Deep Dive
What is the income disparity between Dillon and Carrie?
Carrie earns $16,000 per month, while Dillon earns $3,000 per month as a PhD student. Carrie earns more than five times Dillon's income.
Why is Carrie anxious about money despite their high combined income?
Carrie has a deep-rooted fear of financial insecurity, stemming from her childhood experiences with her parents' divorce and her father's frugality. She constantly worries about worst-case scenarios, such as losing her job or unexpected expenses, which makes her reluctant to spend money even on things they can afford.
What is the couple's combined net worth?
Dillon and Carrie have a combined net worth of $426,000, with $415,000 in assets, $341,000 in investments, $23,000 in savings, and $353,000 in debt.
Why does Dillon feel disrespected in the relationship?
Dillon feels disrespected because Carrie, who earns significantly more, often refers to herself as the breadwinner and calls him the 'housewife,' implying he contributes less. This dynamic makes him feel undervalued, especially since he is pursuing a PhD and contributing to household chores.
What is the couple's plan for a trip to Japan, and why has it been delayed?
They have been planning a trip to Japan for four years, budgeting $10,000 to $15,000. However, Carrie's anxiety about money and her focus on future expenses, such as home renovations and potential childcare costs, have caused her to repeatedly delay the trip.
How does Carrie's money psychology affect their relationship?
Carrie's constant worrying and focus on saving and investing create tension in the relationship. Dillon feels pressured and guilty for not contributing more financially, while Carrie struggles to enjoy their current financial success, leading to a lack of shared joy and connection.
What changes did Dillon and Carrie make after the conversation with Ramit?
They decided to reduce their investments by $1,600 per month and reallocated the money to guilt-free spending, such as Pilates classes, massages, and travel. They also booked their long-delayed trip to Japan, signaling a shift toward prioritizing experiences and reducing financial anxiety.
What is the projected retirement savings for Dillon and Carrie?
With their current investment rate of $51,000 per year, they are projected to have $7.7 million in 30 years. If they reduce their investments to $31,000 per year, they would still have $5.7 million, which is more than enough for their retirement needs.
How does Carrie's upbringing influence her money psychology?
Carrie's upbringing, marked by her parents' divorce and her father's frugality, instilled a deep fear of financial insecurity. She witnessed her mother struggle with money, which has led her to prioritize saving and investing excessively, even when it is unnecessary.
What is the key takeaway for Dillon and Carrie from their conversation with Ramit?
The key takeaway is that their financial anxiety and scarcity mindset are the primary barriers to enjoying their wealth. By reducing their investments and reallocating funds to guilt-free spending, they can start living a richer life now, rather than waiting for an uncertain future.
- High-income couple experiencing financial stress
- Low spending relative to income
- Carrie's anxiety around money causing tension
Shownotes Transcript