Icebound | Ep. 33 | Feed a Cold
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Welcome to Legends of Avantris. I'm Derek Hudson, and you're listening to Icebound. Previously on Icebound. I don't have a thing prepared, so we can all just laugh. No, no, no, it's fine. We were at a dinner. We were at a dinner. You all attended the dinner. You were invited there by Elder Rosemary Nightbloom, the leader of the Tribe of the Shadow Vale Cabal. And Nimrodil.

And Nimrod El. Our friend. Your friend. He's not a superman. That's right. That's exactly correct. I regret ever saying that. I know you do. And you've received invitations to a wedding, and this pretense was the wedding rehearsal

the night before a dinner where the families could coalesce and talk, meet one another. And you had an enjoyable dinner, but the focus and topic of the conversation was your presence. Specifically...

Scrim's presence, for they had a suspicion, they had a notion, they had an idea that perhaps those that they worshipped, these mouths of the gods, these guardians, as they called them, of the elves were the same as Graveyard Jack, the beast that hunts and haunts Scrim's every waking moment. And it was revealed during that conspiratorial dinner that the...

That they would be happy to trade, that they would be happy to exchange the services of Graveyard Jack, a way of strengthening their tribe, of bolstering their magic.

a tradition, something passed down for generations, if that were facilitated, that they would be willing to teach you a way to break the bond, the magical bond that you all forged on your oath-swearing day, your naming day, the day that you became a tribe under the princess of power's wing, under her power, under her watch. You would be able to, uh...

break that bond and no longer be lending some of your strengths to her, but instead, invisibly, quietly, surreptitiously be free from that magic, that binding, that trick.

The four of you tentatively agreed and went your merry way. Briefly, there was a... You were intercepted very briefly by the Goliaths, who were on a path of vengeance. Specifically endeavoring to follow up on the... Well, sorry, they also wanted us... Deathmatch combat, yes. They wanted us...

They wanted Graveyard Jack because we also found out that the princess has imprisoned their patrons. An important point, that this is something that they would normally do for themselves, but the Bargis had been captured by the Princess of Wrath. Thank you. And I only have to get a thousand souls.

And yes, you were transported. I'm probably like, you know, only 920 something to go. Yeah, I mean, who knows how many souls you've actually been able to facilitate at Graveyard Jack. It's definitely less than a thousand. Definitely less than a thousand. Well, and it's unclear. Does it require you to be the one who drives the knife home? Or is it just the purposes of getting Graveyard Jack? It might be fucking a thousand. Fuck. By the merit of being near your party members, have they themselves also been contributing to that number? I don't know. Mysteries swim and scrims ahead. Ugh.

Anyways, you were intercepted by the Goliath tribe. Uh, chieftain, the new chieftain who was the brother of the man that Barnabas slayed. Barnabas got a spear wife. Yeah. And you could have taken a wife, but you rejected it. On its face, immediately, for there is another lover in Barnabas's heart. And you made your way home, and it is here where we will pick up

tonight's session. Sorry? As in, it's scrim. Scrim is not allowed. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, we all know about the fishing. The very end was the soup. Exactly right. We're picking right up. As you are all standing in the living area of the home that has been granted to you as part of the district, the neighborhood that has been partitioned for you and the ogres that you now consider to be the Iceborn, as the princess calls it, the Icebound Castaways.

And you're standing in this living area looking down at a spilled pot of stew, still steaming hot on the surface of the floor. The bones of the man that you all knew as the poet, or at least some of them at least, and what was left of that man, strewn about amongst vegetables and broth, for the ogres had taken you seriously. When...

You instructed them to not let him get his way and not let him take firewood, take booze, take food, break his neck. I'm going to be honest with you, I think that was my fault, guys. I'll just, I'm going to own up to it right now and then we can all move past it. Yeah, certainly wasn't all of us. And you find yourselves staring down at this discovery, realizing and making the connection that the ogres have not been killed

plateaued at the level of intelligence that you first found them after initially destroying the illithid infestation of Oakerton, but are seeming to progress back to their old ways. He hasn't said a thing. Fuck. What happens next is up to you. Get in here! Get in here! Quick, quick, quick, quick, quick! And I was at the door, and I... Oh, you didn't hear this.

Only Scrimmage Hunters. No, I turned and I said to everybody... Oh, it's the poet? I said, "Guys, you killed the fucking poet." Okay, got it, got it, got it. I think it was the last thing that I said. So I'm gonna open the door. Get in here! Go, go, go, go, go, go! Get in here! Get in here!

And I'm gonna try to pull the ogre in. Oh, uh, the ogre, uh, you will remember- This old boy Tack? Um, you will remember- Who wants his penny? You will remember that when you came into the neighborhood, that most people were asleep. The stew had been, like, left out for you, like a heat-up dinner, um.

when you work late. And so when you walk out and you open the door, there's no ogre standing in the street in that way. Most of the ogres have come to rest. No, no, we were talking, I was talking to an ogre. Yeah. I had done my class. Oh, my. Man admitted to murdering. And he told me. That's right. So I'm going to tell him, I don't want him standing in the street.

having just admitted to a murder. Yes. I'm going to... It was a ghost. What? What is wrong? Come here! And I'm going to basically pull on him and try to... I know I'm strong enough to pull him, but I'm just... Yeah, you barely move him, but as soon as he realizes what's happening, he stomps in through the door, ducking underneath the top of the...

As soon as he's in, I slam the door, I relock everything up, and I turn and I say, Okay, alright. Spill food. This is not good, guys. This is not good at all. Manny will fetch more food for you. No, no, no, you've done enough. You've done enough. Okay, I'm just gonna say it. This is entirely not my fault. This is Manny's fault. Manny, why would you do this? Why would you kill a man and make soup out of him?

Man was uppity and he wanted to firewood and food and booze. It was very annoying. Where did you get this idea to kill him? Barnumos said to break his neck. That was more of a figurative. I really thought he was going to say scrimson. Once broken, good meat. Okay. Manny, when did you kill him?

Yeah, but how long ago today? Fuck! Okay. So right after we left... Did anyone see you do this? Have the ogres told- told anyone? You need to tell the other ogres immediately not to tell anyone about this! Fuck!

We can't forget what we learned at dinners. They told us that the poet was very important. I know, I know! To the princess, that she would know if something had happened to him, as if he was magically protected. She may already know that he's dead. Well, I was kinda hoping that, like, you know, maybe he just doesn't show up for days at a time, 'cause he's kind of a drunk, and maybe she wouldn't notice for, like, three or four days, but if it's something magical, then we're fucked! What?

The-the-the-the-the guy that you killed was very special to the princess. Ooh. Yeah, we didn't know either! Or we wouldn't even have joked about telling you to kill him! Why? We don't know. There's-there's no explaining it. The rest are all locked up in her fortress. And one poet gets to walk around free. Why? I mean, he didn't fight back? Did he say anything before-before you tried to kill him? He said no.

That's it, that's it. He didn't say, like... That's usually how it goes, Mr. Stavis Scott. I've done my fair share of killing. He didn't say, like, don't do this because I have money, I have protection, I have nothing, just no. He had stick, and he said he was... That you were all...

That he was able to get firewood because of stick. And then you said no stick, not a stick of power. And so don't blame him. We didn't say that, didn't we? Oh, guys, we really messed this one up. Why hasn't she swooped out of the sky and just killed us all? I don't know, but we might not know yet. We have to do something about his remains. If she sends somebody to search for him,

And they checked the only people that aren't from here. And he's lying on the floor, cut into pieces. There's only one thing we do. We gotta scoop all the soup back up into the pot and just let the ogres eat the rest. Get rid of the evidence. Oi, do you eat all the bones and all? Yes. Alright guys, start scooping. Oi, come, come, come, come over. What do you mean, no? Leave the soup. She will demand blood. Oi, whose blood should it be? Not his. We will find an ogre of the tribe.

You will claim that it was a mere accident. Ogre the titan is not the leader of the entire tribe. He unfortunately is too important. There is no other way. I... You think there's no chance that she doesn't know it was us? It was not us. We did not kill her. Or tribe! Manny is one of us now. We're all always born. It is us, Mr. Yornear.

He did not kill in the name of the Iceborn. Do you see any other way? She will know. So what do we do? We just go get ahead of this thing and tell her? We find a different ogre. We tell her that ogre did this. We hope that this will satisfy her. Were there any other ogres with you when the gentleman with the stick came?

Yes. How many? It counts as four fingers. Four ogres. Are there any of those that you don't like very much? Any that might be a bit of a loose cannon, a wild card? We can't just sacrifice a random ogre! Why can't we just get rid of the bones and hope she doesn't know that it was us? Because then it will be us. It was us!

We, inadvertently or not, we told them to kill him. We're as responsible as the hands that ripped him apart. This isn't good, guys. This isn't good at all. If we take any blame in this, do you not understand how critical all of us are in the fate of the car and in the fate of my home? She has Daisy. She has Queenie.

Two are also critical for the fate of the world. We are all touched by the weird, all of us. Aye. What if... What if I say it was me? What if I take responsibility as the chieftain of this tribe? I am responsible for this one, whether we like it or not. And what if I demand a fair trial by combat? And I face her myself? You will not win. I know.

Manny will speak to ogres. What are you going to tell them? We made a mistake. I don't think that works. We will give one of our own to protect tribe. This is how the giant king do things. You give home and food and protection. We will make right. It must not be you. You know this, Manny. Remember what I told you all those moons ago. You are their leader.

You must live. Do you understand? Yes. Well, okay. Uh, I guess that's one solution. Uh, I'm not even gonna ask you how you're gonna pick. That's not for me to, uh... Perhaps drawing straws or perhaps a volunteer. We will discuss. If you prefer a way, we'll do that. What do you want me to do with head? Well, you still have the head. You...

Ah! A shaving head? Why? Best part, after two, three, four days. Oh, by the gods. Okay, um, don't do anything with the head. Just keep the head. At least it's proof. Choose the ogre and give the head to him. I still think maybe we should just get ahead of this thing and tell her. Try to contact her, let her know, you know? Give her a heads up, no pun intended. Ha!

I think that whoever you decide needs to present the head to the princess themselves. Okay. Are you sure about this, Mr. Yornear? Do you have another way? Does not involve the death of yourself, Scrim, Aisha, and myself? Manny, Daisy, Queenie? I might be able to get a lucky blow. If she swallows me, I could tear up her gullet on the way down. If you die, we all die. I believe this to be true.

I'm not afraid to die, you know that, Mr. Yornero. I do not care whether you fear death or not. You still have a role to play. As long as you have a role, you need to live. All right. You more than him. And him more than the ogres. You are my wisest advisor, and I take your counsel with gravity, and I agree to your plan. She might kill us all anyway. Only at least she knows that...

humans in there and Queenie herself and the young lady. They had nothing to do with this. Yeah. They're in the fortress and it was us and the ogres. Well, if that time comes, then I guess we'll figure it out when we get to that bridge. Why, Scrim? Why what? Why will the princess kill all of us? I said she might and because she's finicky...

And kind of, you know... Oh, because we killed the poet. Yeah, that too. I forgot. That is the whole crux of this conversation, Mr. Manius. It's impossible to know... Mr. Glavinius. She might not handle it too well, all right? And even if we offer up one ogre, she might want, you know, a couple hundred, or also just all of us, you know? There are not more than a couple hundred ogres. Well, she might want all of you. I don't know what to tell you, buddy.

You better find an ogre that's gonna go quietly. That's all I can say. Tack will go. No! No! Anybody but Tack! No, please, Manny! I beg of you, please! Anyone but Tack! Tack likes the princess. No, but he doesn't know! He doesn't understand! Tack didn't do this! You did this, Manny! You did this! I will find another ogre. Thank gods! Scream. What?!

Why do you care for this Tak versus any other? We saved him. We know his name. He saved us. When did you name an ogre? That's right. They tell you not to, you know, that's why you don't name things, Eornia. You don't name the sheep you're going to slaughter. You don't name, you know, ah, God, Tak. What is wrong with you? I don't like Tak. Well, is he a bit of a loose cannon, eh? Yeah.

I was just saying. I don't believe you, Manny. He's been nothing but pleasant. He was very well behaved. Manny Hyperbolic. You shouldn't even know that word. There's something still in there, I think. There's still a glimmer of Mr. Goblinius in there somewhere. Did Pack not try to kill us? Am I misremembering? No, no, he was. It was the very beginning, yes. He did try and kill us. No, he was under the.

Unless you mean back in, uh... In the tunnel. In the tunnels. He was one of the ogres that we left alive. He was, he was, uh, you know, being, uh, you know, prodded by those, those little bastards, and we just convinced him that, uh, you know, he remembered who we were, and that we saved them, and he, he switched sides. Oh, he was with the kobolds, wasn't he? They were like, they were torturing him! Wait, before...

Is there any way we could accuse Whisperfang of this? I wish! I'm right there with you. We could frame this on Whisperfang and get him out of the way. Two birds with one stone, you know? Maybe. We have time. If she's not taken to the air yet, she might not know that he's dead. We could plant the head in Whisperfang's quarters. Maybe Poet cooked himself.

No, I don't think-- That's not really how that works there, man. Sorry, buddy. It's just not-- Have you ever seen a meal cook itself? It doesn't really work that way. Wait, did you happen, if you can recall, I know it's been a good number of hours. Were there any wings in the sky? Any scouts patrolling?

Wing kobolds. White wings. No. All right. No. No, uh, guards. Or flying creatures. Aye. We've been quiet. Strange. I just think if she knew and she cared that much, we'd know by now. Maybe it's not magical. I need an intelligence group check. Oh, shit. Oh, wow. Just straight in? Mm-hmm. Uh-oh. Eight.

Okay, with a plus one, I got a 15. And you say? 11. Also an 11. Scrim. Yeah. You have an idea, something, a thought occurs to you. A moment of revelation. As you recall, all of the effort that the elves put into making sure that the wedding would appear to be

just a wedding rehearsal. That dinner that they would put out all of the seating arrangements and everything and then have their conspiratorial chat with you because they mentioned that there were magical means of looking that the dragon and the ivory clutch possessed.

beyond just the guards and the winged kobolds who flew around, that they had magical means of seeing. Right, right. That occurs to you as you are thinking about how you might have been observed in the neighborhood and how, and what might have been seen in terms of what the ogres have done. The blue eye of Kilrogg, or the eye of Akaros, I suppose. Yeah, the eye of Akaros. The eye of Akaros, yep, yep. So here's the thing, even if they are magically linked, which I'm not entirely sure that they even are,

I'm sure that the princess already knows, because they've probably seen all of it. Just like when Queenie told us that they were being spied on, and the elves told us that they were being spied on, and that's why we had to wait to, you know, talk to them. We're probably being watched right now. A force of sight. I think that if Mr. Yornear is certain in his plan that you find one of the ogres to present the head to the princess...

and deeply apologize on the behalf of Barnabo Streadwake, the chieftain of the Iceborne. Frostborn. Iceborne. I will go and make this happen. I will find an ogre. We will pick one and we will get the head and we will go now? I think that is for the best. Do you want someone to write that down for you? We have to go with him.

I don't love the thought of sacrificing an ogre, but if we're gonna do it, we have to make sure they don't fuck it up. I mean, you raise a very valid point, Mr. Fire Blossom. They're liable to get in front of the princess and say, the ice-bound castaways told me to say this. That's true. The ogres do not think this way. This may be viewed as a great honor to...

Protect the rest of the clan. The tribe. All I'm saying, Yorner, is it might be viewed as a great honor now, and in the walk to the Bastion, they might forget their purpose. Or what to say, or how to present. No, we will take it seriously.

We will go to the fortress and we will hold up the head of the poet and we will challenge the princess. No, no, no, no, no. No, we're not challenging the princess. I forget. I'm not speaking in front of this. We will fight to the death. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Mr. Glubinius. No, that is not what we said. I was offering a suggestion that you are going to forget.

Okay. What do I just say? I think Tyson's right. We gotta go with the guy. We gotta go with him. We gotta go pick out the ogre. And then we gotta go walk him up to be sacrificed. Manny should find an ogre who volunteers to carry the head, knowing full well what will happen to them. And we should walk him to the bastion and present that we found the murderer of the poet. And we have brought justice. And we have brought justice. I see. I see. And...

Deliver him unto the princess's judgment. I think, perhaps, do we pretend as if we don't know that the poet was somehow important to her? Scream. What, what? Ah, here we go. Collect some soup.

With what? Is there like a bowl or something? You need a bowl, Mr. Staviskel. Yeah, but bigger than a soup bowl. Oh, here's a ladle. Oh, I got the missing bowl right over here, Mr. Staviskel. That'll do. Give me the ladle type shit, thank you. This is fucked up. And I'm gonna go over and I'm gonna squat down. And you're just gonna watch me as I'm scraping soup off the floor. And trying to put it in. Matty, stop it!

This is no time for that to be, that's gross. I'm sure you get some of those finger bones, yes. Oh, yes, of course. Don't touch that, I hit him with the leg.

I wrap his knuckles with the ladle and I scoop up the finger bones. And I try to get as much poet soup as I can into this salad bowl. Mixing bowl. And then ten minutes pass. And then I walk over. It's kind of like sloshing. And I set it up. It's filthy. There's pieces of hay and dirt mixed in. And I set it up on the table. I just wanted to see if you would do it.

And I'm like, there, okay, done. All right, now what, you and I? There's your big plan, we're gonna walk that all the way to the bastion, too? Yes, we are confronting her at the bastion, and yes, we need to bring the soup. All right, well, that's a really big bowl. I don't want to carry it the whole way. Somebody else carry it. I will carry it. Fine. I am the chieftain of this tribe, whether I like it or not. I guess it's time to go pick out an ogre, you know?

Oh, yes. One more hit. My gods. You know, why can't we have one normal day? This is crazy. Think about this. This is insanity. I just wanted to go to sleep. Just one normal dinner. That's all you want? That's all I want. And I don't want poet in my soup. You know, like... You didn't even try it. LAUGHTER

Manny, do you know, you gotta be really careful about what kind of meat you're eating around here, alright? Like, if you don't know where the meat came from, don't eat it. And even if you do know where the meat came from and it's human, don't eat it! Even Nogurnoth has laws of what one eats.

All right, well, there we go. Humans are not for eating. I know that you spent your entire lives and your entire culture was around eating humans. But that's no longer acceptable as long as you're an Iceborn. You understand, Manius. I will convey to the other ogres. Oh, yeah, that's right. All right. This is... How do you get this much liquid back in here? LAUGHTER

Talent. Okay, talent. Oh, that's impressive. Yeah. And the starchy face. As a chunk caught. It was one of those accordion, like, drafters. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. All right. All right, Manny, we gotta go. We gotta go pick an ogre, and we gotta get to the bastion.

This is gonna be bad. This is gonna be awful. I'm gonna wrap some skin on top of this bowl so it doesn't spill. Good night. I'll find a skin and I'll wrap it tight and I'll put some twine around it. Oh yeah, snuck. Suit tight, but it'll do. Let's proceed with the grim task. Yeah, Manny, can you lead the way to the ogre's living quarters? Uh...

They all have apartments like yours They were being housed in the giant step with the glance you recall that this was a district that was largely uninhabited and

and there's more than enough room and board for even the 200 plus ogres that now make up the majority of your tribe. And so you push out through the door, unfortunately not being able to, I mean, you've had a long day. You've had an extremely long day. When you woke up this morning, none of you had gone to the Cursed Glade. You hadn't gotten, you hadn't met Wilbur yet.

Oh my god. It's been a long day. You hadn't had dinner. You hadn't had your confrontation with the Goliaths in the streets. Instead, you push out back into the cold, bitter cold away from the fire, and you find yourself looking at the blanket of snow that covers the street, mostly treaded by the feet of ogres, and you can see even a few kobolds who have occasionally gone up and down the street.

I hit up the group chat with the you up. I don't know what that means. Derek doesn't know it. I don't understand that joke. It was very funny.

You make your way down and deeper into your own district and sure enough, Manny leads you to the home where they have stored what remains of the poet and you are able to retrieve the head. It is not a head like you were used to. This head has been cleaved in half like a gourmet fish. It is

perfectly open wide like this massive almost grin in one shape. Two eyes facing out at you in both directions. You can see the ears. It has been perfectly flattened apparently for some food preparation known only to the ogres. He's been butterflied. So down the back? Yeah. And flattened? Well, he lays flat. He's essentially been spatchcocked to use the chicken vernacular. You know, I've seen some

really messed up stuff in my life, but this is up there. I'm certainly not one to shy away from the grim and the grotesque, but this is really taking the cake, if you know what I mean. Does the ritual or this preparation ring a bell in my sort of experience with various giant folk in my life? Or does this feel like Drakkar folk?

This feels particularly brutal. It does feel like you've known, I mean, all creatures that eat meat eat other creatures, right? And those that do that, that have a gourmet or a food preparation process would do that, right? And so of the giants that you knew that might eat something as intelligent as a human, you would...

imagine that this seems like a cultural thing specific to a car, that they might not go out of their way to go through this process. - What I think that it might be tied to, like knowing how big eating brains was before the mind flayers and the ogres and all of that, that it, like them opening the head might be some sort of like brain consumption kind of thing. - Is the brain cut in half?

Uh, it's lying on its back, so you'd have to flip it over in order to observe what's happening to the brains. I'm not grabbing it. I'm not grabbing it. Manny reaches forward, and he, uh, it's on a wooden slab, and he's able to pick it up like a tray and lift it up, and he turns to the four of you. We must choose the ogre. It is your choice.

I will go speak to the others. And he exits, leaving you there in the house on the street, just waiting. Some time passes, 15 minutes, 20 minutes to yourselves, shivering in the cold, waiting, when... I had to pull up my old, old, old notes from arc two. Oh, wow. You wait for a moment, and...

Manny's comes back. Manny returns. And instead of holding the tray, he is walking out sort of soberly with another slightly younger but fierce-looking ogre and approaching you. This is Ukko. Ukko has volunteered to do what must be done for the tribe. Mr. Ukko, were you present when the misgentleman was slain? I was present, yes.

Did you have a hand in it, perhaps? I helped separate his parts for food. Alright, alright. He will do. Do you understand what's being asked of you? The poet is dead and life for a life and I am the life. Alright. You're brave lad, Zuko. You understand that, what you're doing for the tribe.

It's an honorable thing that you're doing. Uko's name will be remembered. You must carry the head on our journey. Yeah, he is holding the tray in front of him. Manny had given him the tray and Manny slaps Uko on the back and is there anything else before we move? No, we should just, we got a long walk ahead of us. We gotta start getting over there. Uko has said his goodbyes.

I could make one suggestion. We probably don't want to present the head butterflied. Is there any way we can... Is there... Hold it. Wow, this is tough even for me. Oh, gods. The head. It's a little...

Oh, no. Got it. Nope. I shot it. Let's just let it be. Come on. We got to get going. We're not making it out of this. You begin to make your way. We'll lead the way. You guys just stay with us, all right? Don't wander off. They follow you.

and you walk to the main road, you make your way around the lake. It is not a short journey. And then not very many words are exchanged as you begin to approach the bridge. And remembering the last time that you crossed this bridge, you would

You were free men, and then you came back out of the Biting Bastion, now known across all of Argentholm as the Icebound Castaways, and you begin to make your way. How do you approach the gates? The...

Towering fortress still stands in front of you, but very few lights flicker in the windows. You can see that there are indeed night patrols and stuff, but it is very much early morning at this point by the time you arrive, and it is quiet and dark. As we're approaching the gates, I'm gonna just kind of like, as an aside towards my four companions,

Uh, three companions. Say to them, uh, you know, we're really getting ahead of ourselves here. We're not even sure she's gonna take a life for a life. I mean, it's good to be prepared, and I'm glad that this, uh, Ugo guy is ready for it, but, uh, you know, we might get in there, and this could take a completely left turn. I think we're prepared for that. All right. I think this is the best hope that we have, at least according to Mr. Yorier. If this does not resolve the potential...

Alright, I'm not saying this isn't a good plan, I trust you, I think this is the way to go, but I'm just saying we gotta be prepared for anything. You know? Uko is ready to meet his fate. And you will meet Sophileth and Ogre Evan, I know it.

for doing such a great deed for your kind. And I know, I have a feeling in my heart that you will sail alongside Trothak the Shark Puncher on one of his many great voyages. Ukko, confused. Don't think about it too much, buddy. He means, he means, of course, the...

Triad? The beyond. We're trying to... Yes, Onam, the Allfather, yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh, and you'll be with Onam, perhaps most of all. That is the eighth voyage. Oh, boy. You know, Barnabas, I think you should try to get the gatekeeper's attention and tell him we need to go in and see the princess. I am Barnabas Shredwake, chieftain of the Iceborne...

We come seeking the Princess of Wrath! We have brought justice for a grave deed done by one of our own! That'll do it. Thank you, Barnabas. Well done.

Okay. You don't have to shout. We can hear you. Please, people are sleeping. I'm right here. I'm right behind this door. You're doing great. You're doing great.

You instead hear the guard yell down, "Barnabas of the Icebound Castaways?" "Aye, say true!" "I will, just one moment, I will open the gates and let you in, and I will alert Whisperfang. Hold there." "Oh, son of a gun!"

You hear the clanking of chains and the great sound of creaking wood as the two gates open and you are allowed passage entry into the Biting Bastion. You are again amazed by the massive courtyard that is in the center of this

tremendous fortress, and sure enough, in just another few minutes, as you're being observed by the guards, they're sort of looking at and whispering at each of you. These are the same, these are not the same ivory clutch, they do not have the wings, they are, but spear-wielding frost hammers, and you wait for a moment. You do not have to wait for Whisperfang to come out one of the stared, uh,

entryways at one of the bottom of the towers. Instead, looking up, you can see from one of the taller towers a span of wings coasting down and sailing in circles until finally coming to a rest just in front of you. You see Whisperfang as you recognize him. "What has happened here? "Oh my goodness! "Look at what you've-- "Look at what has ha--" Oy, it's not good. We're just here to just, you know, get ahead of this whole thing. Grave!

All based on a misunderstanding has been done to the one that we only knew as the poet. We quickly... That is the poet, yes. We've come to understand him as important to the princess. Oh, she is favorite to the poet for as long as he has been here. That is...

Oi, we understand that. We... That we have launched an investigation, and we have found the one responsible Uko here, and he has agreed after consulting with the chief, being commanded by his chief, he has seen reason, and he wishes to pay for his crime as a sign of good faith.

and feel tea to the Princess Wrath. Ugo is a member of your tribe. In the eyes of the princess, you'll all be responsible for this. This is great. This is not a laughing matter. This is not... I don't even... Can't even... You...

Well, first off, we're not laughing. We're taking this very seriously. That's why we're here. That's why we did not, as soon as we heard, we came here immediately. We got to the bottom of it, found who was responsible, and are offering Ukko here as the... It was really his idea. We condemn him to death. Aye, we do, and we would have done it

By my own hand as chieftain, but we wanted to make sure that the Princess of Wrath had the opportunity to claim vengeance should she wish. And this is the reason you're here? This is the only reason you've come? To see the Princess?

I'd hand over Ukko if she does not wish to see. It is not wise for her to see this sight. No, no, no, no, no. If she were here, then she would already be upon us. And I dare say you would be crushed under her talons. Aye, so she's not here? No, no, she's not at the fortress tonight. She's gone off doing her own princessy things. I have no idea.

That explains a lot. Aye, that does. Is she out of the area entirely? She comes and goes as she pleases. She zaps here, zaps in, zaps out. I can't say for sure. We expect her in the early morning. We've been asked to prepare a meal and to prepare her garments for the ceremony. Well, Whisperfang, you are...

wise beyond your years and you are trusted amongst the city and beloved by all the Iceborne. Truly. Very loved beyond the Iceborne. The what? The Iceborne castaways. By all of our tribe and we seek your guidance. We offer, we have found the murderer of the poet. We offer him, we condemn him to death. Well, no, let me think.

Well, while you're thinking, can I have a quick aside with my chieftain here? Just a quick... While you're thinking, I'd just like to talk to my chieftain for a second. Is that all right? Yes, yes, I need to... Please, Icebound Castaways, come, come, come, please, come. I'm looking back. I would like to have an aside and quietly... You get out of your shop. Bonobos, this is your chance. She's not here, and he's right there. You know, a small... We've already made one oopsie today.

You must convince Ugo to do it. Swiftly. Now.

Oh, we forgot two of our-- Manny, Uko, please come here. We're just having a quick aside, come here. Uko and Manny turn and start to make their way over to you. Leave the head, I need to observe it. No, that's fine, absolutely, come here, come here. Uko hands the tray over. All right. What is it? All right.

Well, our wonderful chieftain here has given us a directive. We have a sort of a mission for Ugo. Mission for Ugo? Right, to make this right. Yeah.

Ukko's mission to sacrifice self. To live in legend. Oi, in legend with Adam and Odin and Mamut, is that right, Mr. Yorneir? Yes. Oi, you see that winged, scaly bastard? Yes. We believe that he is responsible for all of this. You understand, Ukko, don't you?

You understand that all of the bloodshed, all of the foil goings on, it's all Vata there. He? He did this? Oh, he did all of it. So all we're asking you to do is just very quickly in one swift movement. And if you need a little help from Manny, ask him for a little help. Just pick him up, twist his head off his shoulders. That's all you need to do.

Make sure you grab it. Other guards will see. Oh, how many guards are there, actually? There's the two gatemen who are manning the gate. Looking around, you can see that there are perhaps a half dozen more within eyeshot. It's dark, but you can see that they're up at the tessellations of the surrounding perimeter wall. Here's the thing. There are guards, but you came here to do a very noble thing, and you might as well...

Get your life's worth out of it. Your life is worth so much. You might as well just take Whisperfang with you. The most important thing you should do is to end the life of the winged one and then fight to the death. Fight. Ugo will fight. Until you can fight no more.

We will do this. I will help him. We will take the winged one. No, not you, not you, Manny. Why not me? I'm ready for a fight. Manny, Manny, there's no arguing. I'm full of stew. I'm ready to go. You're a chieftain. Throw me in. Full of stew or not, Manny. Listen, listen. I am your chieftain, and I will say you will join us as we leave. This is Ukko's trial. Ukko, you need to do it right now. Right now. Please. All right.

All right. Go. No, no. After we leave. After we leave. We're going to leave and once you're alone with Whisperfang, once the winged one, that is when you make your move. Make sure you grab his wing so he can't take off. I believe there's a better time than now.

I've made my decision. Ugo, do it now. Ugo, do it now. I don't care if I have to persuade him. I say we sweep this under the rug. Hold on. I don't even care if I have to persuade him. I think that we're going to need to hide this from the princess or otherwise all of your lives are in great danger. What was that? What was that? Ugo turns. No, I spill the bowl in front of Ugo. Oh!

You throw the bowl at his feet and Uko stops, frozen for just a moment. I get in front of him and I look at your ear as I walk over to Whisper Fang. "What was that you said, Mr. Whisper Fang?" "Well, I can't guarantee that just one life is enough. The poet was one of her favorite friends, a confidant." "Why? What was special about him?"

She... I wish I could tell you. He came to Dracar almost on the edge of death from some land far away, a place called Carchinus. And she amused him. I think that if you knew more about the princess, you'd understand that she just took a liking to him. Almost like one takes a liking to a pet or to a...

Pet is probably the best word. This is all very fascinating, but Barnabas, I'm not sure how that changes our current conversation. I think that Mr. Whisperfang is sticking out his scaly white neck for us. Yes, yes, yes. And attempting to commit a grave, perhaps act of treason in order to cover it all up. No, no, no, no, no. Please, Esso. I am a great...

What?

You can heal him? I can... I can... make him again, yes. Did you notice that his skull was split in two? It is not a pleasant process. It is... but it is magic. It can... whisk away even the most foul injuries. Bring people back from the beyond. I know the secrets. Will he remember?

Oi, will he have his memory? Did he keep more to those spill out when they spat? I don't know. I've never tried it. But when he wakes up, if he does remember, then I'll have a conversation with him and we'll smooth it over. Is he going to really just be... You've never done this before, but he's going to be fine? Magic passed down for generations. My family has all sorts of tomes of the arcane knowledge.

Are we okay with this? I'm still saying there's still time to go back to our previous conversation. Uko races forward. And he starts to fly down and in this instant you see as- Uko, no! Wizard Fang darts back and falls onto his back and screams an arcane series of words and a massive beam of lightning.

chained lightning smashes into Uko, frying his body, his skin peeling off in one instant. Uko flaps down to the ground onto the stone floor in front of you. Oh, what?

What happened? I told you he was a wild dog! He's a wild dog! He was on ends! He was a beast! See, we had to put him down Mr. Whisperfang! You put him down like the rabid dog that you are! You dispensed the princess's justice! Oh, he was attacking me! He almost killed me! Oh, you know he was coming right for you!

You understand your ground! You knew the choice! But indeed, an animal! Oh, I've dropped the head. You did the right thing. Holy crap! Did you guys see that? Has been dispensed and we can still restore the poet. I think so. I will need a day and we must keep this quiet. I need a new pair of pants. Oh, you need a fucking smoke. Holy crap!

Could I get any kind of sense from the blast he used to cook Ugo?

How powerful it was? What level spell? I mean, I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, sorcerer! I'm a sorcerer! Make dragon, make an arcana check! Let's roll some fucking dice, make an arcana check! Twist it, twist it, twist it, five twists. I'm gonna twist it, I'm gonna twist it. Five twists. I wanna get a sense of like, if you just fucking one-shot this ogre, um, how, uh... He, and I quote, "peeled the skin from his flesh."

I want to see if I get a sense of how like powerful a magic user is. He's coming right for us! Reloading! What did you say?

An arcana check. With five twists, it is a 20. With a 20, I'd say that's exactly what you needed for me to tell you the number level spell that he used. You are going into your own thoughts and tapping into your own magical reserves. Imagine what it would take, knowing what it takes to summon fire, all of the things that you've done, and thinking about the concentrated heat. This was a sixth level spell. Okay. Okay. That's higher than I guessed. Lightning bending.

Aye. The spell of kings. Aye. Aye. Whisperfang, you are a great warrior. Thank you for culling our ranks of the mad. We are on behalf of all the eyes bound castaways.

I sincerely and deeply apologize. I thought you were going to attack me there for a second. I'm glad that everything is okay. I am glad and... I think it's best that you leave. Ukko knew he was a dead man and he perhaps thought that this was the only way out. Poor boy. He had actually gotten in bed with the local gang and they were smuggling spice. It was a bad scene. We have your word that you will join us on this journey.

Shared story of ours. It will be like nothing ever happened. I... we have to decide what to do with Uko. But if you will keep the secret, then so will I and you can be on your way and when you see the princess tomorrow, then say nothing. How tall is this bridge, though? Oh, uh...

The actual fortress is on this massive rock, right? But when you're actually walking across the bridge itself and you're above the lake, the distance of this is hundreds of feet. What are you doing? The lake is frozen. He's just splattered out now. I don't know what kind of magic you use, but the head was all that remained of the poet.

Yes, yes. Is that all you need? I could do it with a... If the tones I've read are true, then I could be... Just a finger would be enough. There are some finger bones upon the... It doesn't mix. We will clean it up, and I will instruct the Frost Hammers to... It'll mum's the work. All right, we're gonna get out. We're gonna take your advice. We're gonna get out of here. We're gonna take Manny with us.

And we'll pretend like none of this happened. We will take Uka with us as well. I think that's best. I feel like we should give him a proper criminal's burial.

Show him that not only is laying a hand on the human pets of the princess not permitted, but also raising arms against the great advisor of the princess. So if I get this straight, then the Ugoos was killed because of the threat that he gave the poet, but that he did not kill the poet, is that correct?

That's good enough for me, as long as the poet doesn't remember or doesn't care that he was ripped apart. I'm sure he'll be... He does love his poet, so... No, I say that we noticed that Ukko was attacking the poet. We saved his life, but not after he got a nasty bump on the head. You helped nurse him back to health. We took care of Ukko.

None the wiser. Ah, great deception. Yes, yes, yes, yes. That is the way of it. And as is tradition, we will decapitate him and spatchcock his head as eternal punishment for his crimes.

The poet? He's already... I mean, look at him. No, Uko. Oh, yes, yes. I see what you mean. You do what you want with him. All right. We can get you... Praise Arnold. We can get you a wagon. Praise Arnold. Take him back. Do your own burial. I just don't want the princess to cook all of you before, you know, you're meant to be here. She would be very upset. We will leave now. Mammy, please, if you could collect Uko.

Pretty heavy.

Manny, you know, you really got this, like, sassy thing going here, buddy. I don't remember this. I don't know where this is coming from. I'm worried about you, Manny. I'm worried about you. This doesn't sound like you. Surely, what if you could carry Uko? I'll take this stoop. I can't carry Uko. I'm, like, three feet tall. I, as the chief gen of the Iceborne, I will carry the body of Uko. All right. Well, I was going to have a smoke after that, but I suppose not.

*Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Loud laughter* *Light

I try to live with my legs and not my back, and I try to lift Ukko with my... I try to cloud strife and air at him as piano plays. I think maybe Manny should lend a hand here. I've got him, I've got him. He actually... You're pretty comparable in strength, if you'll remember the ogres. As sizable as they are, they don't exactly...

have the innate, uh, strength, and, uh, between the two of you, you're able to figure it out and, uh, begin to make your way. Um... Once we're, like, a hundred yards from the gate... You're halfway across the bridge already. We're making our way back, yeah. I'm just gonna, like, look at everybody and be like, What the fuck? What? How does... How do these things happen to us? What?

That worked better than I could have possibly imagined. Better? Yes. He had the power to heal the poet. Ugo never had to be sacrificed at all. Yeah, we just showed up with the head. We convinced him to attack Whisperfang, and he got cucked. No, but now everything is covered. Every loose thread has been taken care of. That is true. I hate to say it. His story is confirmed and...

Either way, no matter what, even if Whisperfang betrays us, he would just be betraying Ukko. And if we are culpable because he was part of our tribe, then that would have been true either way. This went very well. Well done, all of you. You too, Manny.

Thank you. I'm very, very proud. Can we just... Can we go to bed? This is a nightmare. I still need to scrimshaw that fucking bowl for the wedding tomorrow. Hey, that's on you, brother. I'm going to bed. This is crazy. This probably doesn't need to be said either, but we have to beware Whisperfang and his power.

Obviously if he has the capacity to heal the poet from his state, he's far more powerful than I think any of us realized. And the way that he killed Ukko with a single spell, he's more powerful than any magic I can bring to bear. Man, he does not trust Whisperfang.

Well, not finally. I mean, jeez, how old was their first clone? Bautobos hasn't liked the guy the moment we heard Whisperfang breathe. He speaks very strangely. It's unnatural, his power. If he's going to bring him back from a severed, split head, what horrible dark magics are happening in that fortress. What are the chances he's actually going to bring him back as is, and he's going to be totally fine? I'm expecting some kind of...

messed up twist or he's not gonna be himself, you know? Come on. What are the chances it actually works? I don't... I've seen strange dark magics on the islands where they're able to bring back the dead, but it's never... Oh, I should've let the dog eat the ogre's soul. Ow, I fucked up.

That's one more that got away. Oh, yeah, that's true. Can you not... I don't know. I'm not sure we even count as being participating. I don't know how any of this works. We were kind of like on it. I feel like I should have done something, you know? I was right there. I think we should also let Uko not be devoured by the shadow beast. He doesn't need his soul anymore. I need it more than he does. Well, I think that he's with the triad now, isn't that right, Mr. Yornir? Does he count?

I have no way of knowing. I don't know. Oh, yeah, that's right. Do I look like I know what a humanoid is? Come on. Get off my ass. I'm just trying to come up. I'm trying to be solution-oriented here. But only on, like, a couple people.

No, we must encourage him to eat them all. They specifically told us we couldn't do that. Yes, and I am saying, do what you can to make him hungry. The princess will be there, Jorner. The cat will be out of the bag. The gambit will be shown. The cards will be on the table. He can't run free and wild with the princess there. If he eats the elves that are ready to die, he will grow strong. This is what we need.

Should be at the ceremony if he tries to eat all of them. I believe they said that the hound ceremony would be private If I recall correctly. That's true, that is true.

What the fuck are you guys talking about? You guys talk crazy. Manny's a honger. Manny, you're just full of stew. You're just full of human soup. It puts you ogres in a weird mood, I suppose. This is Manny after dark. All right, because of Manny's actions, Wooko was dead. We wouldn't put him to rest. Does he have family that still lives?

Yes. Oi, how many? Not many, eh? He leaves behind a wife and daughter. Oh, all right. I just... Adult daughter that didn't rely on her father's income or... LAUGHTER

Very young. But she has to grow up with her father? Well, at the very least, I suppose if he was old enough to have a family that his parents, not still alive, that they want more than, they want to bury a son. No, no parents. They died in the

Oh, bad day for the oogos, I guess. We're really not. We're really fucking the oogos up.

We've really not had a positive impact on the Oghurs. We're trying our best. I just became chief denlock yesterday. It has been an extremely hard week since you've gotten to Arginholm, and Manius takes Ukko's body the rest of the way, and you find yourself back in the wee hours of the morning, staring at what you recognize as only just a few hours left of nighttime before dawn.

Alone again in the living room, the faint smell of stew is still lingering. I'm going to get me a knife. I'm going to bed. I'm just going to pick one of these rooms and don't knock on the door unless it's an emergency until the sun comes up. We've slept here before. I believe we all have our own rooms. That's correct. Yeah, but I'm dazed and confused and sad and tired and...

Go to my room. Is there a reason you chose the word "dazed"? Dazed? No, no, no, it's just... No reason? No, no reason. All right, then. You seem very down, but this is all... Just don't, don't knock on my... Don't wake me up. Don't knock on my door. Unless it's an emergency, leave me alone, all right? I don't want to see any of your faces until the sun is up. All right. You did great today, if it means anything. That means a lot. Thanks, Jornir. I'm leaving.

Oh, you sleep well, Mr. Staviskok. Tomorrow is another day. I don't think I will be getting any sleep. Well, this is what you do when you wait to complete your project at the last minute, Barnabas. You promised an impossible task, and now you have to do it. You really could have just bought something from the shop. I wanted to personalize my gift. Why? I wanted a personal touch. I just didn't want to hand over a satchel of gold and say, boy, whatever you want. Love, Barnabas Dreadwake.

The chief den of the icebound castaways? I wanted to show a gift with a personal touch that reflects the bride and the groom. Well, I hope they really love salad.

I hope they do too! That's all they fucking eat, Mr. Fireblossom! All their food goes in this bowl, there ain't no meat! That's for sure! I'm just saying, if she-- I've got a long day, Mr. Fireblossom! Okay, alright, alright, tensions are rising, we're all at each other's throats. We need some rest. I'm sorry, I apologize, I didn't mean to get short with anyone.

I'm gonna go to my room. A bitter widow tried to marry me tonight! I will let everyone be reminded of! And everything was okay, was it not? If Scrim's dog eats everyone tomorrow, your whittling is wasted! He's got a good point. Everything will be fine. Just like it always is. Why can't a widow just, like, fall out of the sky and try to marry me? Barnabas gets all the luck!

The triad looks down upon us and seen us through to this very moment. Your time will come. For the wife thing? Perhaps. Nah, I'm not worried about it. I walk off to my room and I shut the door and you would hear, if I had the ability to bar it or lock it in any way, they would hear like the soft click of something. I would imagine that there would be a large like turn lock on the back. You hear that click and know that Scrim is... I'm not going to go right to sleep.

in his room. I cannot set to my task. I'll start to, like, carve, and then I'll, like, look up, and I'll see the kitchen is a mess. And then I put myself down, and I make sure the kitchen is spotless. Okay. And I'll make sure I clean everything, and then I'll get back to... I'm not even hungry. I would think about making myself something, but I've lost my appetite. And so I'm going to sit down and scrimshaw a fucking ox and a crane design into this fucking thing all night and not sleep.

You get to work. Taishan, what do you do with the remaining hours of the early mid-morning? I will also say my goodnights and head to bed and not immediately fall asleep. Jornir, would you like some help? You're good at whittling too, I suppose.

And I gestured all your shit. I'm covered in shit carved in wooden bone. I gestured to most of you. I don't even answer. Can you do a bit more artistic than that? No offense. I mean, no offense, Mr. Yorneir. No. I'll take your help. You get half the bowl and I'll get the other.

And I'll nod and I'll sit on the other side of the table with him and I'll take off my small knife that I usually use to wrist-feed. Actually, if you do your side to represent the groom, if he does go through with the wedding, you do the bull and the sort of the cheese elements. I don't know how we can make that look pretty. And I will carve the side of the crane and the difference in styles will be deliberate.

Alright. I will carve this deer. It is a bull, not an ox. I suppose if it is a young lad to be married, we should make sure it's a bull and not an ox. You both get to work and while away the hours.

Krim, what do you do in your room before trying to get some sleep? Once I've kind of leveled myself, I would take off my hat, my scarf, and my jacket and just kind of toss them across the room. You know, wherever they would land, they would land. And I would lay in bed and...

in the lining of my pants. I would take one of, take a dagger, kind of open up the stitching of the lining of my pants and pull out a single gold coin. And then while I'm sitting on the bed, I would think about the task to come, about how do I make this creature, this dog, hungry? Do I

Do I go with what Yorneir says and attempt to summon this thing in the moment and devour as many of these souls as possible, or do I follow what the elves are saying and over a long enough period of time feed it over, because I'll have to make a decision in that moment. And I flip the coin in the air and I watch it vanish as I cast Idea.

Oh. Mmm. How does that fucking go? So I flip the coin in the area while thinking of a problem, and the coin vanishes. You then get a +5 bonus to Arcana, History, Insight, Investigation, Medicine, Nature, Performance, Religion, or Survival ability check. Holy shit. If an ability check is required to solve the problem. If it is a problem that one does not require a skill check to solve, then the DM will give you a hint as to the solution.

if you cast a spell more than once per problem, you get the same advice or insight each time. So I'm more or less trying to cast Idea in a way to maybe commune with this being or even, you know, use it. I know there's not necessarily maybe going to be a role here, but almost trying to commune with this beast that is connected to me in some way for some sort of answer or sign. And the problem...

Is the problem you're trying to solve to make him hungry, or is it really just the summoning that you're looking to... It might be both. It's both. The problem is like, how am I going to summon this thing, number one? Two, and how am I going to control it if I do want to follow what the elves say? Or how do I control it when I want to... what you're near to do and have them just eat all... have them be... show up hungry, right? Like, I don't know anything about this creature.

So the problem is that I don't know enough and I'm essentially trying to commute. And you know what? If that's the kind of thing where this doesn't work, I get it, right? But Scrim is like desperate to like try to come up with some sort of answer or idea or even just some sort of a sign. Make an Arcana or Religion check here, James.

My arcana's plus one, my religion is- We're gonna max twist it. Okay, so they're the same, so it doesn't matter. So, I will get plus five from idea, but I'll also add five. And then five, so plus ten. And then my normal's plus one, so it's a total of plus eleven to whatever I roll. And let's just hope I don't- Oh, not bad. I rolled a sixteen, so I get a twenty-seven. That's... not bad. Let's fucking go. Holy shit! Let's fucking go. Let's go! You think about your...

the experience that you experienced not that many hours ago. It feels like an eternity, but you had... You were pulled into your own memory and explained in some ways the contract that you signed out of fear, not having even read that Elder Nightbloom showed you. And paraphrased, thinking about the...

The fact that your soul is bonded to Graveyard Jack, thinking about your experience since signing it, in those first few days and weeks of fear where you were hearing this barking almost chasing you, thinking that you were the one being hunted, and then being able to almost always sort of have a sense of, like,

Looking and seeing these pair of eyes following you, the time that you spent in the hole at the prison where you met your allies, and almost every single night on the other side of the room just sitting across from you, just waiting and breathing and heaving, you feel that looking for him is not going to be difficult.

You feel that when you need him by your side, perhaps your bond is growing stronger and that that connection you may be able to call upon.

But as far as his motivations for consuming souls, what drives that, what might make him want a thousand souls or a specific soul or how to make him target specific souls, the only information that you really have is a very brief experience that you had in the... and it was Shudder to think of the lighthouse and the experience that you had in the cave when you first attempted to command...

this creature that you know as Graveyard Jack. You start to put those pieces together and you don't come up with a specific, I think I can make this creature hunt, but you do come up with a shape of a plan, an idea of if I look for him and I point the way, perhaps that's all that's needed. Okay. With that, I feel probably a little bit better, a little bit more calm.

and I would attempt to drift off to sleep. You get into bed and you think about that and you have for a brief moment before you drift into sleep a strange sensation of your own excitement. Not fear, but a thrill of seeing and commanding this power that's driven fear into your heart for so long before it slides out. Taishan, you don't go to sleep right away either. How do you spend the moments after you get back into your room?

I would walk into the room and close the door gently behind me and slip off my shirt and let it fall to the side. I walk towards the bed where there's a little nightstand table and I take out my teapot and I just place it on the nightstand, produce a little cup, and I start to pour water

myself who pour out as hot pour myself just a hot cup of tea. Instantly hot. The perfect temperature. I let my hair out and just let it let the tension release let it fall around my shoulders and I grab the tea and bring it to my lips and my hands are shaking. I might notice a little blood from

The poet, the head of the poet, the soup, Ugo, exploding, who knows what. And I glance at it for a minute and just put the tea down. I look at the teapot and the inlaid carvings of the four winds that swirl around it and represent Fu Zhao. And I think about the quest that I've been set on, what I've been meant to learn.

I can smell the burning of Uco still in my nostrils as I think about everything that's happened today. The princess creating a herald to punish the orcs. Her taking the guardians from the elves so they can't die. I don't know what to do next, Fuzhao. I don't know the right path. We have to be strong for...

what comes next but the princess doesn't make this land strong she's destroying the people she's brought together to stand against this force I don't I don't know what's right this what you sent me here to learn the weak die in the strong survive is that what I meant to do face off against the princess and and strike her down everywhere we turn someone more powerful than us how do I keep hope

And I put the cup of tea down and I lay back in the bed and just think about that as I try to sleep. You don't get much rest. You don't sleep. The waves of this emotion continue to pull back and then rise up against you like a tide. You are calm for one moment and then you feel this heat rise

in your veins start to burn at you. And you find yourself sweating again. You reach over and you...

reach for your tea and you realize you've finished your tea and you slap the cup back down. You've only been here for six days in general and already you've seen such violence, such brutality. You even think before that of the journey that you took underneath the mountains and the ferocity of the strange creatures that had such regenerative powers underneath there and what you had to do to survive. And still it feels like you were just climbing, climbing, climbing, trying to survive and

What solution Fu Zhao has meant for you to understand is not served up. You don't have a revelation. Instead, you are stuck going around and around and around in circles until hours have passed. None of you enjoy the benefits of a long rant. You only have a few hours of light sleep. You only have a few hours of finishing your whittling. You only have a few hours of...

before a knock at the door indicates that someone is in need of your attention. So it's a short rest. I would say you have a short rest. I got two spell slots, bro. And with a short rest...

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An all-nighter for some of you. And the knock comes again. I'm gonna get my chair with the bowl. Ahem. Ahem.

My door slowly opens. I poke my head out to see if anybody's in the living room. You poke your head out and you see Barnabas. I'm like so into the bowl right now. Yeah, you take in the bowl. I fall asleep. I don't even hear it. I'm just like... Complete state of flow. You just hear the knocking again. I have not put on my hat, scarf, or jacket, so I'm just wearing my shirt, my pants, and I'll...

Grumble. All right, I'll get it. Hold on, I'm coming, I'm coming. Walk over. What do you want? You look down when you realize that the shorter than a full adult elf is standing in front of you. You recognize Must to be standing at the table. He's carrying a large number of packages. Hey, hey, hey, Scrimp?

Will you let me in? Wedding? Why? Well, I got your outfits. The wedding's today. Oh, gosh. I guess. All right. Come in. I open the door and I take a few steps back. Come in. Come in. He walks in and a nearby table sets down these elaborate ribbon packages. And everyone ready to go? No, no. I'm the only one who's awake. Oh, you're in a seat. He's not. He's focused. Oh.

I am finishing the gift. It's time. We gotta get ready for the wedding. Barnabas! Get up. Somebody wake up Taishen. All right, yeah, I guess we're ready. We'll get ready. Do we have to get ready right now? Yeah, it's an all-day feast. It's an all-day affair. We have only a few hours before the bride and groom are announced and all sorts of stuff. You guys gotta get dressed. I don't even have time to, like, wash up. Is there time for that? Well, I mean, we should make our way as soon as possible. I don't know how long it takes you to wash up. Wait, let me freshen up a bit.

What's that? Let me freshen up a bit. Yeah, I mean, you should make yourself look nice. I breathe and it goes... I mean, can we have like an hour? Like 30 minutes? 30 minutes, yeah. Right, 30 minutes, 30 minutes. Plenty of time, plenty of time.

I would take my 30 minutes to go get ready. You immediately find your way to basins of water. Good morning, your name. I've been sitting close to the fire. Splash yourself with some water. Don't forget your clothes. And he hands each of you a package. And when you open it, you find that there is the formal wear that the tailor has prepared for you within.

Beautiful, beautiful garments. Ceremonial, practical. They're lined with furs. They're clearly layered with insulation, but they're meant to look a lot more form-fitting than a puffy jacket or something along those lines. They even may be slightly enchanted in order to enhance their protection from the cold, as thin as they are. But they come with sort of a long, high-collared...

coat with a dark brown wool, this sort of velvet embroidery resembling the tattoos that you've come to be familiar with on many of the elven forms that you've seen, sort of abstract and arcane shapes.

You also get a pair of nice cloth gloves. These sort of boots are in there. There's a ceremonial sash. All of these are browns and golds and greens. Very unlike the normal attire that you've come to know of the Shadowvale Cabal to wear. The time has come to rise for the day. We must prepare for the elf rituals. Time to face a new day.

I'm gonna grab my clothes. And I'll get changed. Fucking back.

I'll change your private. Yeah, I mean, I would go in my room, get cleaned up, and once the 30 minutes is up and I'm ready to go, I'd be waiting in the living room for the rest of the group. And you still equip yourself with the usual things. What satchel you have, you find a home for whatever you can, and what pockets are available to you. You have most of your inventory on each of you by the time you're done.

finished changing. At the bottom of the box, you find a small silver brooch in the shape of a woolly rhino. A symbol that began, seemingly at least with these elves, has begun to be associated with your tribe. I like that.

Is there enough for all of us? There are four brooches. That's cool. In addition to the clothes that fit all of you perfectly. Each one comes with a tunic that sits underneath the coat, and they seem to even have slightly different colors. There's a sort of a reddish shade to yours. Barnabosa's has this brilliant teal-like color. Yours is pink. And...

There's a almost like green, low foresty green. If you say lichen green, I'm going to fuck you. Well, you're liking it a lot. It's whatever green you say. I've never worn green. I get that druids have the green color, but it's not my thing at all. They chose green for you. I'm sorry to tell you. Damn it. Not again. Not again. I almost gave Scrim yellow, even though he specifically requested not.

The tailor was listening and I fucking hate yellow. If you want to say that yours came in blue, then we can say that. No, I'm going to wear light green again because it's the D&D Beyond Druid color, Derek. I like to imagine the tailor as Jeremy Pivens from Rush Hour 2 and he just made the choice for you. That's very funny. As the Versace salesman. I do my dad cold start in the morning where I'm coughing and hacking and farting. I do my dad cold start in the morning

As I slowly get ready. We're very used to this. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. It's just every day. It doesn't even phase, it doesn't even register anymore. And I freshen up. And I look at this, and I'm like...

You make your way all in a reassemble in 20, 30, perhaps a little longer than that. 35, 40 minutes for some of you to feel truly fresh and to get accustomed to your new garbs. But you assemble in the living room. Mus is also made up in the same kind of formal wear. His is a more brilliant color of green and gold. And he...

Well, you guys have your presents, you have your everything, your truffle too? I think I got that stupid spoon. Oh, there we go. Oh, this'll do, this'll do. Didn't we all have the gifts? I think we sent the presents ahead. I thought we sent them ahead of time. Oh, you just sent them to you. Thank you for reminding me. Yeah, I don't have that spoon. And I think we gave the truffles at the moment of last evening as well. I just wanted to make sure that we all remembered. Exactly right. You...

Exit and you unless there's anything you want to do follow must towards the cursed glade. I'll try to find like Some linen or something to wrap it in like a little my gift and something you find that it fits inside one of the garment boxes Yeah, you want to repurpose that and wrap it up using the same sort of tied ribbon Making it feel as fancy and as secure as possible. At least I still know an Italian note Okay, and I enjoy my friends

You make your way out the main thoroughfare. You can see ogres going back and forth. They're going about their daily business. You do not spy Manius. Presumably he is... Manny, as we call him now, is consoling the poor wife and daughter of Ugo. But you feel like everything is sort of...

Everything seems to sort of be running itself. They are starting to live their own lives as part of your tribe, and what firewood you've been gifted and what food is on hand, they're eating and doing well, and you've got bigger fish to fry. You start to make your way down through the city, past the various neighborhoods, through the streets, and eventually you find yourself confronted once again to the district you visited, not

24 hours ago. The Cursed Glade. You walk through and into the district proper, making your way closer and closer towards the center. You recognize many of the structures now, having walked these same streets on your way to the Truffle Hunt, but this time, Muff takes you a different path. And as you walk by the buildings, you notice that more and more decorations seem to be... Jesus Christ. That was crazy. Oh, man.

That sounded like a stapler. It sounded very violent. It really took me off. I thought the whole top, like, caved in. Yeah, I was trying to be, like, subtle. That scared the shit out of me. Jesus, I jumped. Holy shit, I'm sorry. It's just a fan.

One of you walking accidentally breaks your ankle in one of the potholes. I've been shot! Oh no! I'll stop by the grieving wife and her daughter and I'll say, "Oh, you don't worry, I'll take care of you." I'll hold her hand like an envelope.

Your husband was a good man. We'll take care of you. Like a mob boss, like, going to the widow of one of the guys who was killed. And I'll hand her, like, a little bit of food in an envelope or something. To one of the ogres? To the wife. To the wife of the... Uko's wife. Uko's wife. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. We'll say that you did that. And... I'm being the chief. In the Curse of Glade, you make your way...

farther and deeper in towards the heart of this district, this neighborhood, this center has been, and to, for lack of a better way of describing it, it feels very Bilbo's 111th birthday party.

These are open-air tents. There's a ton of braziers in all directions. There's ribbons strewn about. Again, you are realizing that the theme of this wedding, the color palette, is this green and gold. And the green is this very specific sage-like color. This gold is this very sort of

deep honey-like color, and it connects with you that the families, the sage leaves and the honey wines have chosen this as representative of the union between these two families. There are glowing lanterns that are shedding light in all directions. There are tassels and ribbons. You can see children running through the streets. A huge crowd. Seemingly all of the elves are here to participate in this massive event. A...

Normal wedding might not normally be this big, but clearly this is an important event for the, as you know, the matriarch, the leader of this clan, the head of the Shadow Vale Cabal, Elder Nightbloom, is naming the bride-to-be her successor. And so many people are showing up. They have their own packages in tow. They have their own

and you can see that there's food in all directions. You can smell baked goods. There's cooking vegetables. There's the undertones of very thick burning incense. You start to walk and approach this crowd. You start to walk in, and all of a sudden, Scrim, you are very alarmed when you look down and you see what looks like Graveyard Jack running straight at you.

a frail of smoke leading behind this creature that is running, almost galloping towards you. And you have to do a double take before you realize that it's just the head of a child wearing a mask that looks like one of these creatures. Interesting. He's carrying what looks like almost a...

like what we would call a sparkler, but instead of a sparkling effect, it is creating an inky trail behind him as he's running around and he races past you. And looking down, you realize that you can see children of all types like this running through, begging for food, asking, waiting, oh, I'm so hungry, please, I'm begging you. What can I do for your soul? And you feel a chill of sweat running down the back of your neck.

And that is where we will call tonight's session. Well done. Well done. That was clever. It is like Bilbo's birthday. Very fun. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening to the Legends of Avantris podcast. We hope you enjoyed the session. If you want even more campaigns to listen to, become a member of our Patreon at the Pearl Dolphin tier or higher to unlock Shroud Over Saltmarsh, a patron-exclusive campaign set on the high seas. You can find that at patreon.com slash legendsofavantris.com

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