Men should look for heightened reactivity, anger, and sudden emotional outbursts as potential symptoms of trauma. These reactions often stem from implicit or procedural memory, where past wounds are triggered unconsciously. For example, a man might yell at his spouse or children over minor issues, which could indicate unresolved trauma rather than just stress.
Men can start by practicing curiosity about their bodily reactions and engaging in activities that promote self-regulation, such as controlled breathing, dancing, walking in nature, or yoga. These practices help thaw the relationship between the mind and body, allowing men to reconnect with their visceral sense and emotional center.
Myths serve as universal truths that provide a framework for understanding human experiences, such as the rise and fall of individuals or societies. For example, the myth of Icarus illustrates the dangers of hubris and overreach. Myths help people contextualize their personal stories within larger, timeless narratives, offering wisdom and perspective on life's challenges.
Anxious attachment manifests as a constant need for reassurance and connection, often driven by a fear of abandonment. Individuals with anxious attachment may sacrifice their own needs to maintain closeness, experience intense anxiety during conflicts, and struggle with self-regulation. This stems from inconsistent caregiving in childhood, where emotional availability was unpredictable.
Avoidantly attached individuals can work on leaning into connection by taking small, tolerable steps toward vulnerability, such as sharing more with friends or partners. During conflicts, they should communicate their need for space but commit to returning to the conversation once regulated. This helps build trust and fosters deeper emotional intimacy over time.
Co-regulation is crucial because it helps men develop emotional resilience and connection, which are often underdeveloped due to societal expectations of self-reliance. By learning to regulate emotions with a partner or friend, men can address unresolved childhood wounds, build healthier relationships, and foster a sense of safety and trust in their interactions.
Talking points: trauma, culture, attachment, masculinity
Maybe you’re new (or new-ish) to the podcast. Maybe you’re gunning for new insights so you kick off 2025 right. Either way, we here at ManTalks have got your back. In this episode, you’ll find extended clips from 2024’s top interviews, from the veteran perspectives of Michael Meade to the attachment expertise of Sarah Baldwin. Happy New Year, team.
(00:00:00) - Peter Levine on the symptoms of trauma and using active imagination
(00:19:41) - Michael Meade on the importance of myth, and AI’s possible effects on humanity
(00:31:48) - Sarah Baldwin on anxious and avoidant attachment, and the goals for healing each
(00:47:22) - Owen Marcus on co-regulation and importance of genuine connection for men
Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/)
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