66: Guide to Happiness
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LinkedIn, the place to be, to be. Hello, my beautiful people, and welcome back to the Moments Podcast. I'm going to forewarn you. I'm recording this episode on my phone because God said technical difficulties today, and I wasn't going to let that stop me. Usually when I have

a little technical difficulty. I'm like, oh, I'll just record another day or tomorrow and I'll kind of push it off and procrastinate it. But I'm really excited about today's episode. So we're not doing that. I hope the sound is normal. I've done ads before using my voice memos, so it should be fine. But anyways, we're just going to get right into it. I had the hardest time reading everyone's journal entries. And I know last week's episode, I read a few of them. That was probably one 30th

Like there were hundreds of submissions and I reposted it on my story yesterday and there were hundreds more submissions of other people's journal entries. And as much as some of them are happy and lighthearted and inspiring, a lot of them are really sad. And I think that we've all just gotten to this point in our life where everything around us is sad. So many of us are hurting and

We're spending a lot of time focusing on it, which is a good thing. Talking about mental health, talking about your sadness, your depression, your anxiety, whatever it is, is good. And it needs to be talked about because we need to feel to get through all of these moments and to get past whatever it is that we're going through. That being said...

After being brokenhearted and reading all these messages and like having tears streaming down my face, I wanted to do a podcast episode on how to be happy. Not necessarily how to be happy, how to be optimistic or positive or looking towards the future, even in your hurt. Because I'll continue to tell you that you need to feel your feelings. If you continue to push down what you're going through, it's only going to get worse. We know that.

But it never hurts to know the tips and tricks that are going to make you feel better. And we're really at a point in the world where there's been 40 mass shootings in 2023. It's not even February. And the worst part about that, I've only heard of one of them. That's what's scary. I remember in Boca, I don't even know if it was here. It was not here at all. It was somewhere else when there was a shooting at the movie theater.

And I think maybe seven or so people were shot. Everyone was talking about it for months. The first school shooting, everyone was talking about it for months. And I'm not even trying to get into all this right now, but it's crazy to think about the fact that no one talks about it anymore because it's so normal. And I want to dive deeper into this a whole other time, just about how the world is getting scarier and scarier, but yeah.

We're also at a point in life where we're forced to be in a classroom all day if you're in school. The weather is crappy. It's winter around most parts of the world. Very blessed to say I'm from Florida. I do love it here and I'm really grateful that I get to go in the ocean most days. But in a lot of places, the weather is crap. And when the weather is crap, mentally, we don't do so well. Seasonal depression is a real, real, real thing. But here's what I'm trying to say.

Biologically, some of us are more inclined to struggle than others because there are real things that happen in your brain when you struggle with depression and when you struggle with anxiety. So first of all, please never let anyone tell you that your feelings or your emotions or your struggles and illnesses are fake because they're not. This should be talked about more. Honestly, like obviously, yeah, we know everybody goes through things.

But biologically, in our brain, if you're struggling with a mental illness, it shows, but we don't scan the brain. Anyways, we're going to move on. I'm going to talk a lot today. We'll see what happens here. But we have the power to make a positive change. And I kind of made an outline for this week's episode just because I wanted to make a list of the things that I do that make me feel more positive and me feel happier. So I'm going to share it with you.

Like we can't fix it all. And I know that and you know that, but we can make progress. We can make a bigger change for ourselves.

Before I even get into the episode, though, I want to tell you about the event that I'm having. And if you're not local to South Florida, just listen anyways, because I'm really, really, really, really happy and excited about it. I have two things I want to share, actually. The first thing is I'm starting a newsletter. So if you've ever bought merch on the Moments website or anything from the collections, you're going to get this newsletter probably before you even hear this podcast, because I'm trying to do it this week. It's at the top of my list. I'm so excited for it.

And it's something I've been wanting to do. I've just kind of been postponing it because one, I haven't had the inspiration to write about anything. Like when I was going through it and kind of in a funk, like it was hard for me to work. I had to force myself to get words out. And lately I've been in a talkative mood. So I typed out some things and you should get that. And I'm also going to figure out how you can sign up if you want to be on it and you haven't purchased anything from the collections. I'll work on that. Let you know, probably on my Instagram stories on Monday, whenever this podcast comes out. But yeah,

In that newsletter, I talked about this event, and this is what I'm really excited to tell you about. I haven't shut up about how I've been volunteering at the dog shelter. It's my happy place, my second home. I try to go there every single day. Obviously, life happens and I can't go every day, but it's kind of the place that changed my mindset. And I haven't had a huge mindset shift in a long time until I started volunteering at the dog shelter. I had been struggling, and you'll read this in the newsletter,

I had been struggling with this feeling of emptiness and I didn't really know what was going on because on the surface, everything in my life was perfect. I was doing good in work. I was doing good in connections and relationships and friendship and family. I was doing good. I was taking care of my body. I was doing all the things and I still felt empty. And I realized that nothing was going to change unless I did something to change it. And having that realization was already a big one, but

Point of all of this is that I went to the dog shelter and I saw these dogs who are in crates all day long. And I don't know if I've touched on this before, probably because I literally don't shut up about it. I go to the dog shelter. I see all these dogs in these crates that only get walked, what, every week?

few hours for five, 10 minutes. And they live in these crates. Other than that, they don't get to walk around the block or get my leftovers from dinner. They're just stuck. And I thought it was going to break my heart to see all these dogs feeling this way because one, I'm super empathetic. And even if it's for an animal, I feel their pain and their emotion. But I go in and they're the happiest dogs I've ever seen.

So happy. I can't put it into words excited to see you excited to walk and I don't know You can just tell them their energy that they're happy dogs and it seems like they have nothing on the surface, right? so where this all came into play for me is It opened my eyes to the fact that what I have on the outside Is never gonna be good enough for me if what I have on the inside isn't already good enough for me and this has a lot to do with two weeks ago's episode when I talked about finding peace within yourself because this is that was kind of when it was all happening for me and

Now I've connected the dots of why I had that realization. But yeah, point here is the dogs changed my life and I want to do the same for them. So I'm hosting an event at Tri-County Animal Shelter in Boca Raton, Florida. If you know anyone in South Florida who wants to come, let them know, share the flyer. The graphic is on my Instagram. I need to post the actual thing. But if you can't support, you can buy a bracelet online, a t-shirt or a

What's it called? Why am I blanking? Or a sticker pack. And the graphics are incredible. The same girl, Kate, who does my moments graphics for a lot of the collections, she designed them. So you already know they're next level, beautiful, gorgeous. And...

I'm just really grateful. And I'm really excited that this idea came to real life. You guys know me better than anyone. I tell you all of my ideas. And yes, a lot of them, I make a reality. But a lot of them also just kind of get pushed to the back burner because life happens and other things happen and mental health gets in the way, all sorts of things. So for me to actually pull through with this event is huge for me. And I couldn't have been able to do it. I wouldn't have been able to do it without the people involved.

I'm surrounded by right now. My friends, my family, my mom is my best effing friend who makes it all possible. She's like my, the, the screwdriver that keeps my head screwed on straight, but yeah, it's,

I'll post more information on my Instagram. I'm not going to ramble your ear off about this dog event, but I will say changed my life and now it's time to change the puppy's life and I'm really, really, really pumped up. So let's get into the tips. So sorry, I've already been talking for eight minutes. I don't know how this happens sometimes. There's other days where I'll look down and I've been talking for four minutes and I felt like I was talking for 30. Then there's days like today where it's already been eight minutes and I haven't even started what I want to talk about. Okay.

Before I get into the list, I'd like to remind you or not remind you. I'm just going to tell you that I've already told you guys a lot of these tips. I've shared these habits I'm trying to incorporate into my life, but I usually share them in a different way. Like the idea behind them is usually these things are going to make you less sad. What I want them to be when you listen to them this time, I want you to look at them as life enhancers, a way to level up your life, a way to evolve just one step more.

Because when we change the meaning behind why we do things, they feel different because mindset is everything. I'm going to say that again. Mindset is everything. And when you change the meaning behind the things that you think and why you think them, they feel different and they do different. Let's get into it. The first one I have here is self-love. This is a given. When you love yourself more, you love the world more. Not in a selfish way, but

But I've kind of come to this realization with myself that if I don't love me, I'm never going to be able to let anyone else love me. So I've taken it into my own hands to start loving myself. And this goes beyond just saying affirmations. This goes to the point where I'm going to post something. Say there's a clip I'm filming in a TikTok that I despise and I really don't like it of myself. An older version of me would take that out because I don't want people to see that. I don't want people to see what I look like when I feel ugly.

But when I post that and I realize that actually no one gives a shit, excuse my language, it kind of just brings me this peace. And I'm like, maybe I can work on loving that part of myself because there's no need to care what other people think in the first place. But self-love is a huge one. Start loving your flaws. Start talking to yourself kindly. I can't even count on 18 hands how many times I've told you that. But the next one I have is connection.

This has been huge for me and really, really empowering in my life. Again, I've talked about it before. I have struggled with social anxiety as long as I can remember. And I recently, 2023, it was a resolution. I talked to strangers. I start conversations. I do my best to not go on my phone in public. I make eye contact with people. I wave at people.

I'm just trying to do little things that could potentially make someone else's day because I've learned that when I do that, I feel better. And I want to just tell you a quick story. I promise I'm going to make it short, but I was at a coffee shop the other day and there was this really adorable girl and her boyfriend sitting right next to me. And I had my headphones on, but I wasn't listening to anything. So naturally I overheard their conversation. I'm also a listener. I'm going to pay attention to what other people are saying, but she starts talking and

about yoga teacher training. And I got my yoga teacher certification back when I was 13. And she was going on to her boyfriend about how it's going to cost so much at this place and it's way too expensive. And again, a past version of me would have just like not said anything. I would have just thought in my head, oh, I know a girl. Like I know where she should go get certified. But instead, in this new evolved Alexis version of myself, I turned to her and said, so sorry for interrupting your conversation, but I actually...

I'm a yoga teacher and I have a teacher who can teach you and it's not going to cost you that much money. And my instructor is basically the person who raised me when I was 13 and took me in when no one else would. And I want to give you her information. So I give her my yoga teacher's number and then I keep talking to her. We talked for about an hour or so and she actually adopted her dog from the place where I'm hosting this event. So we got to talking about the event, yada, yada, yada.

She ended up calling the yoga teacher and they went out to lunch today and she's going to do the training with her. And it was in the moment like that, that I realized how valuable connection can be and how real it is that God puts you in the right place exactly when you're meant to be there. And I was just proud of myself that I said something and I was really happy. Simple as that. And that's another thing that made me realize that connection and random conversations are going to make you feel more positive and that

Random conversations also help you escape from whatever it is you have negative going on in your life. Because when you're in the moment, in a conversation with someone random, I promise you, you're not thinking about what you look like in the mirror. You know what I'm saying? This episode of the Moments podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp.

Quick little intermission, you guys. We all know how important it is to prioritize the right things in our life. And maybe for you, that's prioritizing doing leg day at the gym or making sure you go for your hot girl walk. But how often are you prioritizing your mental health and making sure that therapy is a part of your weekly routine? If it's something that you've been open to, if it's something that you've been considering, I highly recommend BetterHelp. And thank you so much to BetterHelp for sponsoring this episode.

I absolutely love BetterHelp. I love therapy. I have talked about it over and over and over again. And that is for a reason. It is the greatest thing ever. Having an outlet and a person to talk to about what you're going through and getting unbiased opinions and advice is so, so beneficial.

So if you're thinking about starting therapy, give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online. It's designed to be convenient, flexible, and suited to your schedule. You just have to fill out a brief questionnaire and you'll get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists anytime for no additional charge. Never skip therapy day with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash moments today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash moments.

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And I'm finally at a point where I'm naturally waking up earlier. I still have to set an alarm when I'm trying to go to the sunrise, but waking up earlier has just made me feel like there's more time in the day. And a huge, huge, huge, huge, how many times am I going to say huge? I don't know.

problem in my life was that I felt like there wasn't enough time in the day. And I had been told time and time again, there's always time if you make time. So I started making time. I woke up earlier. I took the morning to a meet. Oh, this is huge. I don't have this on the list. Immediately when you wake up, you have to do something that's not go on your phone. When I used to wake up, even no matter what time it was, I would scroll on TikTok, answer text messages, text people, go on Instagram, go on Pinterest for at least 30 minutes to an hour.

If I didn't have anything to do that day and the biggest goal, I have a lot of biggest goals. One of the goals I had was to stop going on my phone in the morning. And I think that that has played a major role in why I feel better because when I wake up in the morning, I'm not getting dopamine from scrolling through TikTok. Instead, I'm getting dopamine for walking outside, staring at the sun, playing with my cat, doing my laundry, anything but go on my phone.

Because we get into a cycle. And if you're in the cycle of going on your phone every morning, that's going to be what your brain craves every single day. And it's going to be a lot harder to break the cycle. But once you break the cycle and start the new habit, the cycle is broken. Your brain craves good things instead of social media. Not that social media is always bad, but you guys know it's really, really consuming. So that all goes into play, I guess, with waking up early. The next one I have written down is writing in your journal.

I don't shut up about this either. Just start typing. Just start writing. Once you start, you won't stop. It is likely that you will continue to write and write and write until you can't write anymore, until everything from your mind is dumped. And if you don't want to do it in a journal and you don't want to do it in your notes and you want to write it and then delete it, you can go submit it on my website. I have a little diary page. You guys know the drill. Just go there, write it, dump it, and you never have to see it again.

I personally like to keep my journal entries because when I'm at different stages of my life, I'll read old journal entries just to see what's changed and maybe what I was doing and when and how it made me feel. Next one I have. Let the past be the past. I can't stress this enough. When you move past something, there's a reason you passed it, okay? It is not meant to come back up. You are not meant to spend these moments dwelling on what's already happened.

You can't change it. So let it go. Move on. You deserve to look towards the future and be in the moment. All of these things are better than I'd rather you stress about the future than worry about the past because the future is somewhat in your control. The past is done. It's done. Someone broke your heart. Let it go. You broke someone's heart. You're allowed to, you know, do the apologies and all that. But like, ultimately, you have to move on. That's what you have to do.

The next one I have is remembering, this one is big for me right now, remembering that you aren't responsible for anyone's decisions except your own. And I think this might have to do with how empathetic I can be because if someone does me wrong, I will sit there and I will give them the benefit of the doubt and I'll say, well, they did it because of this and maybe they didn't mean to and I don't know, I should feel bad for them instead of I should be fucking sad because you did me dirty. Language again, I'm sorry.

But I've come to this point where I'm like, that was your decision. That was not my decision. And I'm not going to sit here and feel bad for you for making me feel bad. We'll dive into this another time because we got a lot of things to talk about. But the next one, emotions are energy in motion. How crazy is that? I don't know. When I first heard that I saw a TikTok of someone saying it, my mind actually was blown.

I sat there to myself and said, holy shit, emotions are energy in motion. And what I mean by that is that everything you feel, every bit of sadness is energy in motion. When you are angry, that's bad energy moving through your body. And the in motion part is just the reminder that eventually it's going to move out unless you let it stay there forever. But if you tell yourself, okay, I'm going to feel this through. I'm going to let the energy move through me. I'm going to feel it and it's going to be gone.

The energy is out of you. And then maybe the next energy emotion that's going to come through you is joy, laughter, happiness. I don't know. Laughter is not an emotion. Anyways, the next one kind of relates to that. No feeling is final. My workout class that I go to, the teachers always say this. We'll be pushing through on our like 10 millionth rep of freaking, I don't know, donkey kicks, fire hydrants with a band on. And I'll be so ready to give up. And they go, no feeling is final. As soon as this is done, it's done.

And that's it. I don't have much more to discuss on that one. It's just something I wrote down and I think you might like it too. Next one. I'm out of breath. I don't know why I'm like talking to you guys and panting, which is probably a sign that I could slow down and take a freaking deep breath. I think I'm excited because I'm going to go jump in the ocean after this and I want to get there before sunset. But two minute rule.

probably maybe not sure if I've touched on it before. If it takes less than two minutes, do it. This has helped me keep my space cleaner, keep my room cleaner, my life cleaner, my mind cleaner. Right before I sat down to do this podcast, I remembered something that I was supposed to get done a couple hours ago. And I was like, oh, I'll just do it after the podcast. And I told myself, it takes one minute, just do it. If it takes less than two minutes, get it done.

Go switch the laundry. Go put that dish in the dishwasher. Put your clothes away. That's all I got. That's all I can think of right now.

Next, actually eating good food. Okay? Not processed junk all the time. Not holding your body back from what it deserves. I mean, putting good things into your body. And of course, I'm the biggest advocate for balance. And I think everything is good in moderation. If you want soul food, go get a big fat cheeseburger and cheese fries with bacon and whatever it is that your mind is craving. Get it. That being said, don't eat too much.

Also incorporate the things that are really genuinely good for you. I'm talking eggs and greens and spinach and I don't know, chia seeds and flax seeds and

Healthy fats like avocado and fruits and vegetables. Put all of that crap into you because it's not crap. And whether we want to pay attention to it or not, it will make you feel better. It is going to positively impact your brain. It's going to impact your energy. It's going to impact your physical strength. Like think beyond the surface level of it. It is actually making a difference in your body. And that's going to make a difference in how you feel too.

You know what I'm saying? But still, eat the junk food, okay? You deserve it. And do not restrict yourself from crap. I don't know how many times I got to tell you. Your body wants food. Give it food. It deserves food. Your body is the reason that you can walk, that you can swim, that you can belly laugh with your best friend. Next, trusting. Not necessarily trusting everyone. That is something I struggled with for a long time. I just trust people way too easily. And again, give people the benefit of the doubt where it's not deserved at all.

I had a situation happen to me and I told my therapist about it and she basically told me you are way too nice about this. And I was like, oh damn, really? And part of the reason I'm nice about it is because selfishly I like to kill people with kindness. I want to let them know that they did me wrong by being kind about it. Not sure how to explain it. But point of that is don't trust everyone, but trust God, trust the universe, trust that you're right where you're supposed to be and just trust.

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Yeah. Next. Actions speak louder than words. And I don't mean this targeted at other people. I'm talking to you. Your actions speak louder than your words. So if you say you're going to do something and you don't do it, hello, not good. Do it. Just start now.

Instead of using actions speak louder than words to talk about how other people have done you wrong or whatever the case may be, say it to yourself because that has been a huge one. Oh, I have it written down next is keeping promises for myself. I've touched on this before too. Most of this I've already talked about. I'm just doing it all in one spot right now. If you...

Tell yourself you're going to do things and you don't do them. Your brain is going to start believing that you're never going to do the things that you say you're going to do. In small things, in big things, in everything, you have to keep promises to yourself. And the way that I've learned to do this is I started small. If I told myself I was going to put white strips in, I put the damn white strips in. And that's kind of where I started. And then I started doing it with... Well, actually, no. I started doing it by...

Giving myself rewards. So if I was like, I'm going to eat an icy and a large popcorn, I ate the icy and the large popcorn. So first I do it with good things. And then I slowly transition it into things that I don't want to do, like wake up at 6am. But eventually when I told myself I was going to wake up at 6am, since I've been training my brain to do all the things I say I'm going to do,

I don't give myself an option anymore. When I wake up in the morning, even if it's hard, I don't fall back asleep because I know that the reward is worth it. Like me getting up at 6 a.m., no matter how tired I am, I know that jumping in the ocean is worth it. And the reward is bigger than the pain. That's an expression. Not sure how it goes. Next, keep, no, I've just said that. I can't read. Start a night routine and a morning routine. Personalize it to you.

I could sit here, tell you my whole night routine, my whole morning routine, and it's probably not going to work for you. You, one, might not like it. Two, might not be able to do it because it's not things that you want to do. But you need to do something that works for you. I'll briefly touch on what mine is. My night routine, I take...

Purposeful showers, intentional showers. Sounds silly, I know, but I put my favorite songs on whatever playlist I'm in the mood to listen to. Sometimes that's rap from high school and I just sit there and freaking go at it. Sometimes it's a Taylor Swift album that makes me want to cry or sometimes it's house music. Whatever it is that I'm feeling, that's the music I'm going to play.

And I have been doing this oil pulling thing, which is where you switch coconut oil around in your mouth for 15 minutes. And it's really good for getting bacteria out and just keeping your oral health healthy. I love to do that. And then I wash my body like really, really good scrub scrub. And I have like this sugar scrub now. I do that after. And then I use my tongue scraper and I wash my face and I keep a gua sha in the shower. And I give that purpose.

I say my affirmations. I think positive while I'm in there. And I know that these things sound so cliche and silly. And sometimes when I say them out loud, I feel really stupid. But I wouldn't sit here and lie to you. I am telling you things that are actually going to impact your life if you give them a chance. You know what I'm saying? I've been saying that a lot. Sorry. But...

That's what I do at night. And then I sometimes get my journal out and sometimes I don't even touch it. Even if I try to, I just don't. Or sometimes I read and sometimes my mindfulness night routine is scrolling on TikTok because that's what I'm going to enjoy. You have to find what works for you. And again, it might not be the same thing every day, but I want you to pick a few things that you do your best to keep consistent.

And then same thing goes for the morning routine. There's mornings where I have to get up really fast or I'm running really late and I don't have time to do these things and I'll do them later in the day, but I still try to get them done. And I also don't punish myself if I miss a day because one day is a mistake. Another day is a decision. So if I just let it go, tell myself it's okay, I'm more likely to do it the next day. You know, if I'm mad at myself for not doing it,

I don't know. I'm going to be stubborn and not do it the next day. That just could also be how I work. Doing things alone. I'm still needing to do a whole episode on alone time. I can't remember if I have or not, but do things alone. Be by yourself. Find comfort in your own energy. Talk to yourself. Enjoy your own presence. Go for a walk. Do a little yoga flow on the floor of your room by yourself.

Do whatever it is. Whatever you enjoy doing with your friends, I want you to learn how to enjoy doing it alone. And I've always said this, but I haven't had too much of a problem with alone time. I've always been okay with it. I don't know why. I think that part of that reason is because I have you guys to talk to. Like if I'm making a TikTok or something, I don't know. I just kind of tell myself I'm not alone. But in the past couple weeks or months, I've been doing it alone.

I've found a genuine enjoyment with being alone. And if I don't have my alone time, I kind of go insane. So when I go to the beach in the morning, that's my alone time. And I sit there with myself, with my thoughts or in the sauna and I let the thoughts come through because sometimes when I'm in that silence and like full on peacefulness, I'm forced to think about things that I don't necessarily want to think about. But when I think about them, then I can let them go.

Like emotions are like everything is if I keep letting it build up inside of me I'm gonna burst but if I'm forced to sit with my negative thoughts That's when they'll pass through next Responding to people this one might just be a very much Lexi thing I have always had a problem getting back to people and one it's because there's a lot of things going on in my phone and

Just because there are because I start conversations and I do a lot of things that I can't keep up with and I try to like check in with everyone all the time because it's really important for me to do that. I love to check in on my friends, but that being said, all of my friends usually respond. So then I'm like, oh shit. And then I sometimes trust myself out, but I've been trying to just respond to people right when I get the message. Don't put it off. Don't delay it. Just get it done. That one's kind of niche. Next. Uh, what do I have here?

Getting ready every day. This is huge. I used to, I still kind of do work from home. I can work from anywhere, which is such a blessing, but you are someone who works from home or does online school or for whatever reason, don't have to get ready in the morning. I want you to start getting ready. It doesn't have to be the second that you wake up, but once you get moving, change out of your pajamas, throw some makeup on if you want, do your hair.

When you get ready, you will feel more motivation to go get things done and to get a move on with your day. And for me, that makes me happier. For you, I don't know. But that's a piece of advice I have on my Lexi's ultimate list to being positive and happy and enjoying life. The next one is rest. I have a quote on my phone, but since I'm using my phone for the voice memo, I can't share it with you right now. But it was something along the lines of, instead of asking yourself if you have...

time to rest. I'm trying to think what it is. Ask yourself, hold on, what is it? Oh my gosh. I'll repost it on my Instagram story on Monday. But the moral of it, the long story short, is that you have to rest properly to be able to do your best work. If you want to be successful and be mindful and put your 100% effort into the work that you're doing, whether it's for your job or for your school or for your passion project, you

you have to be well rested. And if that means switching things around or managing your time differently, that's what it means. And I know two things. One, there are people who genuinely don't have time. There are people who are working three jobs to make ends meet. And I applaud you more than you will ever know. And I am, if you're listening to this, so grateful that you are taking your free time to be able to listen to this. But

There are other people who will say they don't have time because instead of taking two hours to go for a walk or go move their body, they're spending those hours on TikTok. And now here's where I find a little bit of common ground because this is kind of how I started doing all this. I spent two hours on TikTok. Then I started walking while I was on TikTok. So I was getting my

phone dopamine, but also moving my body. And eventually I stopped craving the TikTok and craving the walk more. So I did different things while I was on my walk. Next, speak your mind. Dude, this one is really, really big for me because I don't know what happened in my life in 2023. I was the most

Anti-confrontational person of all time. You did me wrong. I would just kind of let it be I would let it slide I would never speak up for myself or say Yeah, you kind of screwed me over and you should feel bad about it This kind of touches on one of the other ones I talked about I don't remember which one But i've gotten to a point in my life where i'm going to say how I feel I am going to be vulnerable if someone upsets me

or hurts my feelings, like down to my heart and my core, I'm going to tell them. Because once I tell them, I can take the pressure off myself. Same way, like, I blame myself for a lot of the things I put myself through and I have broken my own heart many times before, which podcast episode on that is still coming, I promise. Once I tell someone what they did and how they made me feel, that's it. There's nothing I can do and now it's in the past and that person's decision is that person's decision. And...

Ultimately, you'll just feel a big weight off your shoulders if you start doing that. And not only will it benefit you positively, but it will also benefit the person you're having the complication with or the issue with because now they can know how you feel. You can't expect people to read your mind. You have to tell them what is going through your head because a lot of times people don't, they don't get it until you tell them straightforward with your words. And that's what I got on that. The next one I have.

Remind people that you love them, even if it's just a text. Call your grandparents. Hug your family. Definitely hug your family. Family is so important and so special, and I know I've talked about this a lot, but that's because it means a lot to me. It really does. I have always appreciated my family. I've always had a gratitude for my family, but lately, it's extra, and I

Just remind people you love them, your best friends, your acquaintances, whoever you think of and when you think of them, just shoot them a text. You never know when you can make someone's day and when someone needs to hear it. The next one I have is, yeah, I have two more. Get outside. Go outside. I don't care if it's snowing. I don't care if it's hailing. I don't care if there's a fire burning in the forest. You need to step outside. You need to touch the grass. You need to stare at the clouds, watch them move, look at the stars. Nature will heal you.

every damn time. I spend every morning that I can because sometimes I have real responsibilities and I have to go do things and go places. But whenever I have the time, I sit outside, I stare directly into the sun. One, because Andrew Huberman, if you listen to his podcast, he's so smart and legendary. It resets your circadian rhythm, which is basically your natural sleep schedule. So it'll help you

Wake up earlier naturally and go to bed earlier naturally. I'm not getting, not even going to try to get into the details of that. But what was I saying? I stare at the sun and it, I don't know. I feel like I photosynthesize and it's charging me. And again, I'm saying shit that makes me feel so stupid, but it's so real. And I'm telling you it from my core, from my experience. Like this is real things that have changed my life in the past, not even month, since January 1st.

or Christmas time. I kind of started my resolutions then, but the last one I have, and for me, this is the most important. This is just a list that I cultivated on my way home from the library. So we could probably do a part two because there's definitely more things, but this is the one that's most important to me right now. It's not all or nothing. You don't have to do every single one of these things every day, all the time. And you don't have to

Do them in full. You don't have to 100% complete your night routine. You know what I'm saying? You can just start it. Even if your night routine includes brushing your teeth, putting on your skincare, doing white strips and scrubbing your body and putting moisturizer on. If you only do two of those things, you still did something. And you deserve to give yourself credit for that instead of giving yourself a hard time about how you didn't do the other three things. Because guess what?

a past version of you or on another day, you would have done none of those things. So give yourself the credit for the little wins and you'll want to do more. Trust me, when you're kind to you, it motivates you. I mean, think about if your gym teacher sat there. I had to pause. Lissette walked into my house. We're about to go to the beach, but...

Moral of the story. It's not all or nothing. Oh, if your gym teacher is yelling at you, you're not going to keep running. If your gym teacher is encouraging you, you're more likely to keep running. You know what I'm saying? There I go saying that crap again. We're going to cut this off, but this is what I wrote down at the end of my notes because it came on on shuffle on my Spotify. Hannah Montana once said, life is what you make it. Okay. So go make it great. Let's make it rock.

Not even trying to be cringy and dramatic. It's just what's coming to me naturally today. So that's the wave that we're on. And I'm going to go take this energy and go play on the beach like a little kid. And I hope that you do the same. And if it's not the beach, go outside, go for a walk, go run around, go take a mindfulness minute, take a few deep breaths. And remember that I am proud of you and I am proud of where you're at. I don't care if you're at the highest point in your life or the lowest point in your life, you are still worthy and valuable and deserving and you're

It doesn't change anything. Your value does not go down just because you are not in a good place in your life. Keep working towards you and for you and just know that you deserve the best and never settle for less. And I really, really love you and appreciate you. And you know the drill. If you want to come to this event on February 11th, please be there. I would love to see you. And if not, the link is in my bio to buy bracelets or stickers or t-shirt. And yeah,

As always, you guys are my best friends and I can't wait to talk to you next Monday. Bye-bye.