We Were Three - Ep. 1
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These first two episodes of we were three are free, but to hear the whole series, you'll need to subscribe to the new york times where you'll get access to all the serial productions and in your time shows. And it's super easy you can sign up through apple podcast or spotify. And if you're already a time subscriber, just link your account and you're done.

Rahel mckibben and her dad, pete kao, stop talking and resume talking many times over the course of her life. He could be generous. He could be mean and drunk.

SHE learned how to be mean. SHE left california, moved across the country. He loved him when he could, and SHE never wrote him off. SHE made sure her kids knew the good version of him. When covet started, Rachel and her father were in a barely talking phase but a few months, and he emailed her .

trying to find the email where he reached out. So I think the word was infusion info.

Sion meant he was sending money.

Here we go, infusion, right?

SHE opened the email .

in IT said, just want to be sure that my new family is safe. And all of this, please. If there's anything you need, let me know.

We are family. After all, I was like, OK. Here's an .

olive branch. He sent a thousand dollars to her bank account. An infusion had saved the day.

Rachel, her partner, at the time Jacob, ran a bar and restaurant in register new york. IT was closed, covered. They were strapped.

They had three kids at home at a five a year. So later conversations with her father were very different. Her father was insisting that Rachel, not vacation, ate his grandkids, her children.

He called IT murder. When he pushed back, he'd rid to kill her, me, to stop talking to him. SHE didn't bother telling her father when SHE, her two Youngest kids and Jacob all got covered in the fall of twenty twenty one.

Even when Jacob went into the I, C, U. For five days and the doctors told her to pray, SHE still didn't reach out to her dad for support. Four days after Jacobs finally released from the hospital and back home with Rachel on the family .

recovering at about midnight, my brother sent me a text that said, i've been too distorted to tell you, but dad passed away today at two forty two P. M.

Because as a text, yeah, a text telling her that her father had been dead for hours, SHE figured car accident. He knew he had been driving a lot looking for work. SHE called her brother Peter katcha, junior.

I said, Peter, what is happening? What happened? And he explained that they had gone to a funeral. He said, I never should have let dad go to the funeral with all those vacant people.

Vaccinated people her brother believed that covet vaccines weren't just dangerous for people who got the vaccine. Vaccinated people were dangerous to be around if you were unvaccinated like him in his dad. They live together. They've been living together for years.

And I was like, I can even begin this argument. I'm just gonna listen and he goes, I should never have hugged any named a cousin and he said, sh'll never have let my dad hug any named the same cousin there are all vacant .

idiots so he didn't say dad had covered he's he's just saying, okay.

right? He just starts what they never should have let him go to the funeral to hug vaccine people he said, because of all their sheep, they shed the virus. And I IT stopped to me in my tracks.

And then I just, I was like, so like, what happened? He had covered. And he said, no, no.

But he he was having trouble breathing. He had a new monia like Peter. All of his symptoms are covered. You're saying at the breathing, you're saying he was fatigue. You're saying he he lacked the strength .

to even .

eat at one point. He was just sort of trying to poor milk, not milk, sorry, it's soup into the corners of his mouth and spring him with water to get some level of hydration. And he said that his bed was covered in sweat, and then he said dad would stare off and so i'd slap him and then he'd look at me and that he just, he like, he would say, hey, data, you OK and he'd go.

yeah until the last time when he didn't and .

he said dad's eyes were just White open and I I slapped him and he was gone.

Rachel was trying to take all of this in trying to get information without letting loose on her brother, who was plainly brief struck, having just watched their father die in front of him. But he was telling her he had watched their father die in front of him for days. He didn't take him to the hospital, didn't call nine one one, didn't call Rachel to teller. Their father was so sick he could barely speak. Then another thought, hitter.

I said, Peter, you've been his nurse this whole time, how do you feel? And he said, well, I mean, we both probably got sick around the same time, but you know, i'm healthier and dad and I said, Peter, you understand, you definitely have covered.

Can you take a deep breath? I need you to do take a deep breath for me and he did and I go, okay, how do you feel? He goes, that was, i'm tired and that's when I just lost IT and I screamed at him and I said, if you know you're his older sister ah, older and only sister and I said, Peter, I can forgive you for not taking that to the hospital.

I can find forgiveness somewhere in me but I swear to you, if you don't go to the E. R. Right now, I will not forgive you when you die.

You are going. You are dying. I need you.

I need you to go to the E. R. Right now.

Rachel stayed on the phone with her brother, heard him get into the car, the doors slam, the engine turnover. SHE finally relaxed a bit when he heard Peter go inside the hospital and check in. He was forty four years old, six with four to twenty, never smoked, didn't drink, lifted weights when kobi hit, he'd been on a cleans.

He had helped insurance through medical w california medicaid system. But Peter hadn't had a full time job in years. He depended on his father.

He didn't have his own bank account. His first text exchange with Rachel from the hospital was about money. He asked.

how much was jack bill?

Meaning, how much was Rachel then partner Jacobs medical bill when he had coffee SHE text IT back.

I said, as seriously as last thing you need to be concerned about right now so just please IT doesn't matter. I'm so proud of you for taking care of yourself, Peter he said, one hundred and three temp, oxygen levels low. I said, yep, jacka was at eighty three when I brought him in.

That's really, really bad and he said they just, but do not put me on a ventilator when I said, Peter, you are a fighter. I need you to meditate on your living on surviving this he says, things were getting me going on this. I wasn't going to get any Better at home and I said, no, you weren't. If they wanna put you on reducible, her asked them to pair with aluminum. It's a game changer.

Rendezvous in aluminum was the combination that doctors were given to Jacob the week before. That's how Rachel knew about IT. SHE had just been through all this.

If IT isn't the monia yet, they need to put you on the monocle and bodies.

This is you seeing others to help others to him.

And he said, I don't like these guys.

Peter didn't like the guys at the hospital because they wanted swap his nose for a pcr test to see if he had covered. He told Rachel he thought the swab tests were scam, that doctors got a fifteen thousand dollars onus for every swab they did, that LED to a positive covered result.

I said, I love you, Peter. Let them help you get Better. He said, I love you too minutes later, positive for code.

Within three days, Terry's great surprise in relief, Peter told her he was on the mend. He went home to rest, and he made plans to go out to santana, california, where he lived and where the two of them had grown up.

Peter ash, to a couple of times after we left the hospital whether their father's cause of death had been identified yet SHE said cove IT, even though he didn't seem a decertification because IT seemed obvious to her and SHE turned out to be right. When Rachel got to sanna, along with one of her older kids, Peter asked them over the phone not to come in the house, said he still felt too vulnerable because they were vaccinated. He believed again that vaccines make people share the virus, and therefore vaccinated people are especially dangerous to be around for the unvaccinated.

Rachel decided to give him some time. They would seem before they left, they could do IT outside in masks in the backyard. SHE didn't push.

He sounded tired. SHE wasn't surprised after she's had covered. Sh'd barely been able to open a jar for a week, Rachel cup, checking in via taxed and phone calls.

SHE was handling the paperwork in details of their father's death. SHE was dropping off food at the front door. Food logistics, love.

you're hungry. Can I pick you up anything? I'm close.

I'm two blocks away. He says, can't think of anything right now. Those guys ever contact you. I say I called the yesterday, he said their super busy in the paper. Word was sent to the crematorium um on thursday.

That's one of their last texts. Peter died a week after Rachel got to sanna SHE never saw him a long time neighbor found him. Retail learned from the corner that her brother had not made a quick, remarkable recovery and been discharged from the hospital to go rest at home as she's believed he had checked himself out of the hospital after two half days against medical advice.

And I was stand. I didn't. I mean, what that means is that.

He was lying to me. He knew what to say. He knew what to hide. I just, I mean, I was, I always floating through my days. IT felt like my brain had been wiped.

Rachel was dumb, founded by how much SHE didn't know about her father's and brothers last month of being alive. Everything was gone. All the answers sh'd put off trying to get from her brother about why he hadn't asked for help for their father.

Gone, her brother's recovery fake some kind of performance. He had no idea what he had been thinking as he was fading away, what he had been doing instead of telling her the truth. And then rita made a discovery, a record of Peter's final days, and SHE found out exactly what happened from cereal in the new york times. This is, we were three. I'm Nancy updike.

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one. Black backs cov caught us, what we were busy. Each person had found in each family was in the midst of their specific unfinished business. They're preexisting fault, ines.

In these connections, the fall lines are why here this is a story about a family and what coveted to them, what IT destroyed, but also what IT revealed. Rachel lived thousands of miles away from her father and brother, and he was used to stretches a relative silence with them. But those quieter periods were always part of a rythm that swung back.

Even in angry silence was never permanent. Now, the fact that shouldn't have any idea what happened at the end, Rachel was commented by this, not knowing the pain propelled her SHE wasn't quiet with grief. SHE was vibrating with IT.

SHE had questions. The first person SHE called after talking to the coroner was her in Peters cousin Rachel and her brother were only a year and a half a part, and the cousin was right around the same age, mid forties. The three of them had grown up playing together.

Her cousin seemed just as baffled as he was by petter's debt, by the fact that he'd left the hospital against medical advice. SHE asked him a terrible question. The coroner had asked her any chance this was intentional, had her brother been suicidal? Rachel l.

Didn't think so, but he also felt like, but how do I know? He says, her cousin said, no way, no way. Peter wanted to live. At the house for Peter and her father had lived, Rachel gathered up old photos and look through them.

These are all great photos, and I want these, but like one, if they had any photos like of themselves, like pan even know they looked like in the final years, I don't know. And so I started charging their phones and then I heard blue, blue, lue, lue, blue like message, message, message. And like, oh, god, I didn't think about like there's people checking in on my brother and I just started reading.

Rachel looked at a text from the cousin you'd just talked to his last text depute. On the day Peter died, he said you, jack, please answer me, man.

And then before that are several tiktok links.

And I like what are these?

I don't have the I am like I don't really know how to Operate IT. I me it's like i'm not interested in IT. And then I just got up and I just couldn't help but just be invested in their conversation.

Rachel keps growing up and up and up through the text between Peter and their cousin, until he was back in october when Peter was still alive and was texting with her cousin about what to do about Rachel and Peters dad, who was so sick with cover at that point he was having trouble lifting his arms. The cousin guesses that Peter's father might have mile car dius. Peter thinks maybe it's a bacteria infection of some kind.

The night before Peter's father dies of covet, Peter, texas cousin, and says, do you or your mom or anyone in your house have antibiotic ics? A minute later, the cousin writes back now and ask Peter, how are you feeling? Peter, twenty minutes later, definitely not well yet.

A fever that keeps spring back to one or three agitating dry cough in the skirts again, my dad has the same cough, only one hundred temperature in a shallow breathing, pretty fast. I'm thinking the fever keeps coming back because IT might be a bacterial thing. The cough is horrible.

I'm beeping that because he he wrote f in that a bunch of aster risks. The cough is horrible because IT wait till we lay down to go to sleep and IT becomes very itchy and we can't go asleep because of IT we end up caughey all night. So we're both very sleep deprived.

Cousin fuck, that's bad cause in a few minutes later. Okay, so tomorrow i'm going to bring you guys. I'm to heal you guys.

Peter, oh, man, burning IT. Cousin, I will. I just got a run to the store tomorrow morning and buy ingredients and make IT.

I also have an immunity kit that I just ordered from my old job, keeping IT like behind glass in case of emergencies. It's time to break the glass. Peter sounds good to me.

I'll tell pops. Fifteen minutes later, Peter texts about him and his dad. We were already detoxing anyway two weeks prior, so I thought our bodies were just following through in its own.

I mean, we gave up the bad food we are eating every day, even coffee, coffee. Dude, yes, even that creamer. And then this comes on. It's like we try to do IT right? Then we get, cousin, dammit, you guys were too clean.

Rachel saw over the course of her father's last day Peter describing their dad fluctuating caughey granting losing control of his bladder and bowls, Peter giving invitations and probiotic ics. The cousin dropped off the final round of soup on the porch in the afternoon, seeing how her father's death that had unfolded was awful, how he suffered. But Rachel also read those texts in everything Peter in her cousin wrote going forward, with the helpless awareness of somebody watching a greek tragedy, knowing what the characters don't, all the horror that's to come.

It's like the black box after a plane crash. It's like hearing. Ghosts speak of themselves. I mean, I just responded with absolute rage and heartbreak. SHE saw the text exchange .

between her brother and cousin at the moment her father died. Peter, I believe he's taken his final breaths, and then a minute later, he's gone. Cousin, what Peter? What Peter? I seriously don't know what to do now. This is when Rachel saw herself enter the conversation. When her brother texted her that her father was gone. SHE saw in the texts how the shock of their father's death had opened up a window of opportunity with Peter, and in that window Peter had texted her and SHE convince ed him to go to the hospital. Or as he put IT in a text to the cousin.

Rachel demanded that I go to the E. R. Some going to the E. R.

Their cousin texted back, keep me posted.

That was when I understood that there were dull conversations being had, and that one was my attempt at saving my brother's life. In the other one was my cousin's version of an attempt at saving my brother's life.

Rachel computers cousin didn't respond to my texts, letter in phone message requesting in interview with him. I'm not naming him because of that and because I don't want strangers harassing him over the story. Rachel hasn't spoken to him since he found the text between him in her brother and he isn't contacted her.

Peter, in these text back and forth with each of them, is clearly scared of his life. And I don't know what people do in countries that have a functioning health care system. But in the united states, a lot of us, maybe most of us, seek out advice from friends and family.

In the mist of the health crisis, the friends and family guidance is often supplemented by the internet. And then we're faced with a messy pile of anecdotes, jargon and sales pitches to sit through that messy pile maybe all a person has if they don't have a primary care doctor. Peter didn't, but he did live close enough to a decent hospital that he was able to make IT in time to be offered possibly life saving care.

At which point he began to worry, can I afford this, Peter, miss trust of the medical system revolved around money in his text with his cousin. Even before he and his father got sick, Peter kept returning to the idea that he didn't believe in the copa tests and treatments because people were getting rich from them. He believed there is a government plan that gave hospitals and doctors financial incentives to kill people and blame covered.

Peter was afraid of the wrong things with covered. He was just incorrect. But the overall idea that the U.

S. Medical system is shaped by profit seeking that is often at odds with good patient care. As a fact, no one in amErica is wrong to be afraid of medical bills. In light of that reality, and in light of Peters earlier texts, it's a sign of just how scared he was when he texts Rachel from the hospital and says.

thanks for getting me going on this. I wasn't going to get any Better at .

home and IT was hard for rattle to accept, as he was reading through the texts that only forty minutes after he wrote that to her, when he finds out the hospital will be giving him a nasal swab, Peters resolve starts to fault and so Peter text their cousin, they pcr red me, cringe ogi too sick to get up and leave no response from the cousin and our later Rachel text, Peter.

I love you. Peter, let them help you get Better .

Peter writes back, I love you too, an hour leader. The cousin text him, did the test come back yet? Peter positive, of course. Peter text the cousin that he's just been given some steroid in his iv IT was an anti in flam ory dex ethos, an an inexpensive generic for anyone counting at home.

A month earlier, before Peter's father had had even got in sick, the cousin had texted Peter that, quote, hospitals get at twenty percent bonus for administering fouche SE poison room now, the cousin text, Peter, what was the steroid called? And a couple minutes later, okay, I just read room desave er is not a steroid few Peter text the cousin an hour later saying Rachel said if they want to put you on room deselect asked them to pair IT with aluminum it's a game changer no response from the cousin the cousin to and hf hours later, fuck that. Do not take room desecrated fifty four percent chance it'll shut down your kidneys several hours later, Peter text the cousin, they finally brought in a bag of him deserve ere and I said, i'll hold off on that and he said, okay, that's fine.

Had no problem with the nurse assistance and the nurse, but soon as the doctor comes and makes a decision, you know, it's the once the cousin, a minute later, no, no, no. Rim desecrated ter text in a photo of an iv bag. Cousin asks, they're giving IT to you, Peter. No, I told them all pass because in, okay, I know you're tired, but keep an eye. Those fuckers watch everything they're putting in those lines.

I'd offer him advice and i'd see him go to a cousin to get like the second opinion, you know and he would just always derail those efforts. It's just the most unfathomable, absurd conversation to watch happen.

Peter ticks the cousin, a photo of his dad at that family funeral. He told Rachel about their dad is using a relative who was vaccinated. As he'd mentioned to Rachel, he captions the photo the day my dad was killed the next morning.

Peter text the cousin team finally down ninety eight point eight, still on oxygen, because my oxygen levels are weak. The cousin, i'm glad you're starting to improve. The sooner the Better.

They won. Have a chance to kill you again. The cousin didn't respond to my interview requests. One of the things I know about the cousin, the very little I know from reading the full thread of his texts, is that he is a father.

Two of the family members who live with him are in their seventies, and he worries about their health. He's a man with multiple heavy respons ibi, ie. S, who is also up late and early for weeks, worrying about his cousin Peter checking on him. I also know from Rachel, but about ten years ago, the cousin lost another cousin, Jennifer, who was like a little sister to him after he went to the hospital.

Unexpected IT didn't make sense. He was the Young gest of the four of us cousins and her, her blood had been nicked during a sync. An and SHE had septic, and he was Young and had his babies, and then SHE died .

and the whole family was crashed. Rachel and Peter, too. Jennifer was thirty two years old, and Rachel says that for Peter, this medical error was one searing event.

In a lifetime of smaller moments, they gradually transformed him from someone who would never trust a authority figures in general and didn't go to doctors he believed he could take Better care of himself with exercise and nutrition than some doctor, to someone who saw doctors in hospitals as dangerous and later is actively seeking to deceive and harm and even kill people for their own gain. The day before he leaves the hospital, Peter text the cousin the doctor finally came down and asked why I won't take them to severe. And he said, you're not vaccinated and I said, that's correct.

He said that the only treatment we have recovered and that my lungs are going to deteriorate, ate with the oxygen they keep ordering for me. If I don't take the room to severe, I said, i'll think about IT and he said, okay and left, i'm desipere might have reduced Peters need for oxygen. Concentrated xy gen can harm someone's lungs over time, especially if they've been damaged by, for instance, COVID.

Because in text back a few minutes later, both that room deserve ere is gonna deteriorate your organs, especially your kidneys? You've been pumping up your profit all week. He's just trying to scare you so we can get his twenty percent bonus for using room desecrated.

Same doctor will tell you the vaccine is good for you IT makes no sense because now that you're confirmed that you have covered in your recovering IT seems like you'll have natural community for life. You won't need boosters, just pray your oxygen level improve so you can get the hell out there. As Rachel is reading the texts, SHE keeps glimpsing these moments here in there over the last weeks of Peter's life, when Peter acknowledges this is covered.

But the idea of covet is like a balloon that can stay loft. Peter texts a bit later. All I have to do is jog a little. I'll get my oxygen back up.

Sitting in a hospital bed isn't doing anything oxygen wise because in do the turmeric and mentally for lung inhaling exercises at home yeah you're not going to continue to deteriorate. Is a fucking liar. A few minutes later, Rachel text Peter, and they go back and forth about his oxygen levels and whether he has enough energy to eat.

And if he has a phone charger, Rachel asked sim if he's heard an estimated timeline for them to discharge him. Peter texts, they made IT sound like soon, possibly today or tomorrow. Rachel.

holy shit. okay.

I've talked to retail a bunch of times, and from what i've seen, SHE doesn't like to let untrue things slide. SHE really doesn't like IT. But in her text with Peter, I can see her trying hard to be careful with him, trying to encourage him, support him, telling what he thinks is important in her big sister way, but not argue with him.

This deliberate with holding of her full forcefulness, is part of their relationship. Rachel, feeling protective of Peter, is built into her earliest memories. He's been physically bigger since he was fifteen, but she's always been tougher.

Peter, later that afternoon, tests with a cousin, and again brings up the idea that maybe this might be covered. Peter, can you look up safe treatments for covered the cousin rights back? Hang in there.

I'm checking frantically. And then the cousin texts monitor anybodies convolution ent plasma, or ever met in the first two options are usually only given one in the E. R.

Once you admitted the protocol changes to him to severe, they only treat the vaccinated with iver mecon. So that way when they recover, they can say, see, the vaccine kept you from dying mother fuckers. The evidence about iver mecon is now overwhelming.

It's not effective as either protection against COVID or treatment of IT. And while we're here, natural immunity for life against COVID is not a thing. And vaccines don't cause people to shed the virus. But let's talk briefly about rendezvous. I spoke with a few doctors who've been treating code patient since the day in clinics and hospitals.

They were unanimous ous model vere has revealed itself to be not actually a very effective treatment against covet IT isn't harmful in all the ways Peter's cousin kept saying IT was that was from disappear strength. IT was generally safe. Studies did confirm its modest usefulness in some patients.

But is one doctor put IT from the severe was a tool we used because we had so few tools, even the drug combo Rachel recommended from the severe plus aluminum. One careful study showed patients who got the combo were less likely to die than those who got from severe alone, but only about three percent less likely to die. For an advanced severe case of covered, there is no consistent game changer.

So the medicine of covet has been genuinely confusing. We can't know if Peter would have survived even if he did stay at the hospital, but IT was probably his best shot. Two doctors I spoke with told me how important IT was in their experience to just let a patient talk if they were reluctant to get treatment for anything.

Don't try to convince them. Just ask them, what has this been like for you? Then listen.

But the doctors were also Frank about how often with COVID, they didn't have time for that conversation or energy before cover. They'd seen plenty of people who are afraid to be hospitalized, who didn't want specific treatments. But with COVID, those conversations were different.

People weren't just reluctant. Many were hostile. Some got aggressive. One doctor said he had the experiences over and over a patient sh'd known for years, seeing her in a mask and instantly distrusting her.

The doctors both said that simply asking if a person was vaccinated would often stop the conversation cold, and each person's reasons for not wanting a particular cov a treatment were spoke their own tightly held bundle of beliefs and fears that were extra resistance to change. A doctor might be able to teeth out and address the contents of that bundle LED fast enough to help the person, or they might not. Anyway, we know what happened this time. Peter left the hospital. That's up the break.

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when Rachel started reading through her brother's texts, SHE knew he had left the hospital against medical advice. SHE found that out from the coroner, but you didn't know how that happened. Now he saw Peter, texas cousin, at three thirty in the morning.

I'm starting to wonder if they're ever gonna me out and my cousin says they have to release you upon request. My brother says, I so hope that's true. And then my cousin sends him discharge against medical advice.

Screen cap from very well health dot com that stay to discharge against medical advice, usually just called an a requires that you sign a former Green that you wish to leave, but that your physician thinks it's a bad clinical choice for you to go. He says, legally, they can't keep you there. That's considered false imprisonment. And my brother response, have an hour later.

How should I say? IT quote, I need to be discharged. Unquote, and my cousin says, are they currently giving you any medications? My brother, nothing yet today.

Actually, all they ever gave me with steroids in ana biotics. My cousin, okay. Do you have an iv drip? Peter, no, just had me on oxygen.

My cousin, um, is your auto s still at about or above ninety five? My brother, it's off right now. I was around ninety four.

All I know is i'm not getting any Better in here so we he says to me, thank you for convincing me to be here. I wasn't going to get any Better at home and tells my cousin, i'm not going to get any Better. I'm not getting any Better in here in the hospital. My cousin, how does your chest feel? Peter feels Better than IT dead when I first came in, which is a sign of the treatment working.

That last part isn't in the text. IT was Rachel venting her frustration as he was reading through all this. Again, SHE could barely contain her rage. By the end of this next part, SHE was nearing my cousin.

yeah. And the fact that they give you an a biotics, that means again, IT was bacteria monia and the steroid helps with the information. That's why the fever went down and your long's irritation went down as well.

Now it's a matter of getting over the cup for just going to linger for a few weeks, but you can probably handle that with a cop. Sera, because all they ever gave me was antibiotics and the prescription for a strong cop syrup two minutes after I believe you're out of danger. Now, fuck their protocol. It's time to get probe biotics back into your body.

From the time Peter left the hospital, he lived another two weeks. All that time, Rachel was in a fog of coming to terms with their father's death. And he thought her brother was recovering, like most people who get covered due. But Peter was texting with their cousin about his blood oxygen level.

A reading between ninety five in one hundred is considered Normal, but on different days Peter says he's at eighty, eighty eight, ninety one, eighty five, ninety three, eighty two, ninety, fluctuating from OK, but on the low side to working ly low. Rachel had no idea. Peter didn't tell her, and SHE didn't press him. A few days before Peter dies, their cousin texts you.

you good. My brother doesn't respond twenty three minutes later out right in the slice, meaning as crack. That's their language for that. And he sends yet another tiktok .

link Peters response ten minutes later is garbled. He's describing his own actions, but IT comes out sounding more like a transcript of Larry half thoughts.

Try to make things easier. Let's not go back and fourth for anything. Go straight to the kitchen. Stay in that chair.

Keep thinking of what you need that way while you're doing all this SHE might get fully winded. major. Most important thing of all is the chair in the kitchen is a roller chair.

The roller chair is an office chair Peters using to get around in a few days. Rachel l is gonna find that chair in the kitchen soaked with your own. One last thing, Rachel season Peter's texts, is that he wasn't the only person trying to get him to seek medical help.

One family friend was texting information just about every day about clinics he could go to a nurse who talked to him. We also don't know what the cousin was saying, Peter, in phone calls with him, and he did tell Peter in one text after Peter told him his blood oxy generating was eighty, that Peter needed to go back to the hospital. Then Peter tested that I went back up to eight eight, which is still too low, and should have sent him to the emergency room.

But the moment passed, Peters neighbor was checking in and leaving food on the porch for him four days before he died. Peter text the neighbour, I was so exhaust looking at all that food. The neither writes back, dude, you should go to the hospital.

Call an ambuLance, Peter. Peter's last text to his cousin is a sad mogi about the death of the actor William lucking, who started sons of anarchy. The next day, the cousin tested how you do in Peter and got no reply. The day after that, he wrote the jacks, please answer me, man.

Rache told me once about her brother and father and covered that IT was like they fell overboard during the pandemic and swim streak to the bottom, thinking was the surface. When he finished reading the texts, SHE read them again. Her brain kept coming through them for weeks. SHE couldn't settle on any thought or any feeling I would .

go from not being able to speak or to crying or to making fun of my brother. Like there's the survival mode person who just wants to clown you you know like the deep depths of like my hood ness where i'm from that particular street I came up on we will lawns you for how you died cause you're a fucking clown like you played yourself on me. You know and I like I would I would I would kill some its instructors to bring them back.

You know like or would I I don't know. Like it's just one of those things where you just hugo. Like thinking, like who you would trade out on the street to get one more sharp. But unlike you, shut your fuck and shot, dude.

Rachel, a poet IT doesn't really cover IT though. Rachel attractor beam, I can easily see how a person could hear her, read her poetry at some event, and then marry her four months later, which happened. I can understand a person wanting to tattoo her words on their ARM, which also happened a lot of rituals.

Ating is about her childhood d family, her, her father, her brother. The first poem in her first book is titled epically, I forget who I said IT too. But I remember how afterwards they looked at me as though I had driven a steak knife through their mother's hand.

The pole itself goes, I love my brother. He had the exact same child, hod decided, but he doesn't get credit for IT. He isn't the writer.

I'm the star of the violence. I expose my Peter when he marries. I will be so sad.

No girl in the world deserves him, but me. I see that poem which I love as a little backs. Rattle is daring her readers to open retails.

Always seen her place in the world, in part in relation to Peter, her Younger and only brother, her responsibility. Still, somehow SHE hadn't lived near Peter in almost twenty years, but far away is still somewhere. It's nothing like gone.

What do you do? And you've lost something important. You retrace your steps. Rrh hel remembers where SHE and Peter started, and now he knows where he ended. And she's going back over what happened in between the things he saw because he was there and the thing she's finding out happened leader out of her sight. What did happen in between what life did covered london that next time in part two of we were three.