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Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California, this is the Broski Report with your host, Brittany Broski. Hey guys, just doing a quick Millennial Cringe warm-up this morning. Okay guys, here's my five-step Millennial Cringe facial warm-up for the morning. You're gonna hit one of these, then you're gonna hit one of these. Oh my god, they used to love that one. No.
You tuck your front lip. So if you've got a front lip, where's your back lip, do you think? I can show you some back lips. Anyway, sorry. Anyway, yeah, they used to tuck their top lip up under their gums so their teeth, it looks like a rat. Yeah, I used to hit that one in middle school sometimes. I'm not even going to lie. I used to hit that one. And I was like, God, I'm killing them. I'm killing them.
And can I be honest? I get some of those millennial cringe compilations on Instagram. I watch them all the way through every time. And I'm just, I am overcome with a sort of primal rage. It's like a train wreck though. Like I have, I have to watch them. I don't really have a choice.
Okay, guys, lots, lots, lots to cover today. Welcome back to The Broski Report, starring me, your host, Brittany Broski, occasionally Timothee Chalamet, okay? Only other person who's ever been on this show is Timothee Chalamet, so just note that. Some things really quickly.
I did have a Cortado this morning. Okay, now I've figured out what that is. That's going to be three shots of espresso, steamed oat milk. And if you have never smelled what heated up oat milk smells like, I wouldn't recommend it. That shit about made me gag. Okay, tastes fine. But then again, oat milk, I guess, is bad because there's palm tree oil in it.
I don't know! Everything I consume is made of plastic! I'm turning into a fucking plastic curtain! There's plastic in my blood! I don't know!
Everything is like, have you tried the viral milk replacement? Fucking macadamia nut milk. And I'm like, oh, great. So I guess oat milk's out. So I go look up what's in macadamia nut milk plastic. Oh, perfect. So this plastic is better for me than the other plastic. Okay, thank you for clearing that up. What the fuck? And also, what are you going to do? Go to a coffee shop and be like, half a teaspoon of macadamia nut milk, please. I hate macadamia.
That feeling. Can I get the milk alternative? My tummy, I be shitting. Like when you order a milk replacement, a milk alternative, you are admitting to the cashier that you are of a weak breed.
Could I get the oat milk? Okay, you are at the bottom of the food chain. That's what you're admitting, okay? My gut bubbles when I smell milk. That's what you're telling them. You're communicating that in a roundabout way. And there's something very humiliating about that. It's a humiliation ritual, okay? When I'm like, could I get the almond milk? Oh, you're a puss? Yeah. Yeah, sometimes my butthole kind of bleeds when I poop.
Sometimes I have milk and then the rest of my day is ruined. I have to stay home. Oh, not the cow milk for me. I'll actually have a fucking reaction. Yeah, I had a Cortado. I guess it was okay. Three shots of espressos, you know, that'll do it. And I had that about 30 minutes ago. So I don't know. How long does it take coffee to kick in for real? How long does it take coffee to kick in?
within 10 to 30 minutes, but can take up to 60 minutes. Okay, great. The peak concentration of caffeine in the blood occurs after about 45 minutes. Y'all, once again on this podcast, I am a ticking time bomb. Also, the last two episodes...
I filmed in the same day. Surprise. I took an edible for one of them and then I felt, and it kicked in halfway through. And then I filmed the second episode. So I was just, I heard a damn guy. And I did not even, I watched it back and I was like, good Lord. I really thought I was like, they can't tell. Yay. You can tell. Hey, yeah, you can tell.
Anyway, did a cortado. And now I'm doing, I'm working through these. Okay. Red Bull sent me these for free, these watermelon fucking. And I made the mistake because I'm only human.
And I bleed when I have a milk. They sent me these. It's watermelon Red Bull. Well, of course, the first time that I had ever tried this was in a sort of watermelon Red Bull vodka that I made myself that I almost puked up later. So naturally, when this sort of flavor combo hits my palate, I want to gag. And that is not Red Bull's fault. It's certainly sort of Pavlovian conditioning that I've done to myself.
where now every time I taste the watermelon Red Bull, I also taste Tito's vodka. And I am a fan of both of those things individually, but not together. I would not recommend because on TikTok, people were like, watermelon Red Bull vodka. It's basically like a watermelon Jolly Rancher. And I was like, candy! Candy!
And me, as a 27-year-old woman, was like, candy in my drink! Yes! Candy, candy! 27. Okay, walk, don't run! Wait. Run, don't walk to try the watermelon Jolly Rancher fucking sugary drink! Sugary poo-poo in your diaper drink! Me like, okay, where can I find that? I just picked a wedgie. Okay, so...
Update on that is I'm about three espresso shots and a watermelon Red Bull deep. And once again, how much caffeine is in a Red Bull? 80 milligrams per 8.4 fluid ounces. What is this? This is 8.4 fluid ounces. What? 80? That's really not a lot. That's less than a cup of coffee. How much caffeine in an espresso shot? 64. Okay, so let's do 64.
calculator. 64 times 3 plus 80. Fuck me. Okay, so I've got 272 milligrams of caffeine right now in my system. Okay, yay! Wait, that's awesome. What's the daily max? 400? I've googled this countless times. Daily caffeine limit.
400. Can pregnant ladies not have caffeine? What, is that going to make your baby have ADHD? Can pregnant ladies, can pregnant women have caffeine? Yes, pregnant women can consume caffeine in moderation. Excessive caffeine consumption during pregnancy over 300 milligrams a day has been linked to an increased risk of premature birth. I did not know that. Good thing I'm not pregnant! Okay. Okay.
What the fuck was I talking about? Okay, so those are the sort of things I wanted to get out of the way before we get into the actual meat and potatoes of the episode. Because I'm about to go hog wild. I'm about to go pork and beans on this microphone. If y'all could sniff this microphone, I don't think you'd ever listen to this podcast again. Actually, it doesn't smell that bad. That was sort of just an intrusive thought of like, I've actually spit on this thing.
Whaaaaat? I've HUCKED to it on this thing, like, what the hell?
So many times. It doesn't smell that bad, but surely no one else would want to sit here. You know what I mean? Okay. Here's some housekeeping. Very, very quickly. Of course, the last two episodes were pre-Trump inauguration. Hey, I didn't realize how bad it was going to get. Okay? But a message to the general populace, especially during Black History Month, is that he does not have as much power as he would like us to believe.
There are still laws and regulations in this country to keep him in check. Of course, he's sort of blasting through these executive orders, but ultimately there are three branches of government to keep that power in check. So I know it's a hard sort of piece of advice to be like, trust in the powers that be because of course, you know, they're not really looking out for her best interest and that's just sort of well known. But at the same time,
All these fucking, you know, constitutionalists and all these like freedom, freedom is the biggest. Okay. Just we have to have faith that like he will not win is what I'm trying to say. You know what I mean?
So my message is have faith and keep the hope and we move forward. And that's honestly a segue point into something I want to talk about later, which is books, because I have book recommendations. But we'll move on from fuck Donald Trump to happier news. Congratulations to Beyonce, Giselle, Knowles-Carter for winning this.
the Grammy for Album of the Year. After four snubs, four snubs, she has been nominated four times for Album of the Year, four years snubbed. Lemonade did not win Album of the Year the year that it was nominated. I digress. Cowboy Carter had won. Okay. Now, the cultural significance of Cowboy Carter,
I'm not the one to actually speak on it. You know what I mean? Well, actually, I have. Go watch the Calvin Carter episode because I spoke on it. This is so... Like, you want to talk about deserving. You want to talk about the most, like, heavily awarded Grammy-winning artist of all time. Thank you, Beyonce. Okay? And there's really nothing else to say. How about the look of shock on her face? I love her so much. I love her so much. And the tour was announced. Okay.
Yeah. Yeah, let me see if I can go. Yeah, I'm going. Yeah, I'm probably going to hit two or three dates. What the fuck? Okay, two more things really quick that are just completely unrelated. In the vein of music, there is a YouTube video called Morning Jazz Playlist to Start Your Day. And the thumbnail is Snoopy making a sandwich. And I cannot recommend this video to you people enough.
This video provides me a sense of calm and peace in the morning that I just cannot... I'm on this wave now where I'm trying not to listen to music with words in it. I'm trying not to listen to too much music with words in it. Okay, I'm doing a lot of classical. I'm doing a lot of exciting classical Tchaikovsky and Bach, okay, and Straussberg.
and I'm also doing a lot of bossa nova. Then I do some of this, like smooth jazz for cooking or morning jazz to get your day started, and I'll do my little ballet stretches because here's another thing that I've discovered because I haven't talked to you all in a while. I've been gone. I was in Paris, and now I'm back. I'm stateside. There is a plethora of YouTube videos that
on YouTube that I just get recommended on my homepage. But essentially, it's a morning warm-up bar. Because you know how ballerinas will warm up at the bar, that little bar, doing the little plies and stretching and whatever and warming up their ankles and whatever. But
They put those for the Royal Ballet School in London and I think two other ballet schools. Sometimes they'll put the full hour-long warm-up on YouTube. Of course, I don't really know what they're doing, so I can't follow along, but it's a good sort of motivator. Well, I'll put that on while I'm in bed still waking up in the morning. I'm like, okay, let's do it. Get up. Let's stretch. You
So I'll do that. And they always play classical piano in the background to warm up to, like exciting piano. And it's good. It's good for me, I think. Because here's my one qualm I've had with Bar Method. I love Bar Method. But they play like, fucking, if I love, that sort of shit. Like, I don't want to hear Bad Habits by Ed Sheeran dubstep remix while I'm trying to work out. I don't want to hear that.
Bar Method also is very ballet inspired. Like, you do have to fucking work out on the bar. I don't want to. I love Florence and the Machine, but I don't want to hear Dog Days Are Over Radio Zed remix. You know what I mean? No, what's that? They play that one song. Same! They play that song and I say, because I love Florence and the Machine, but I don't want to hear Florence Welch at 8 a.m. when I'm like, oh, fuck her.
Okay, I have to be tapped the fuck in to listen to Forge of the Machine. Okay, anyway, I digress. Yeah, I wish they played more classical music, which I'm not going to sort of fall on that sword. I'm not going to go up to the instructor and be like, hey, love what you're doing up there. A bit more Tchaikovsky would be nice. Thanks. I'm not going to do that. Also, I'm not going to say I'm the youngest woman in my bar method class, but...
I look around a lot and I'm like, all these women are 40 and 50, like older than me, doing it easier than I am. I'm huffing and puffing. Oh, my sciatica. They're in the corner with their leg wrapped around their neck and they're doing this and they're in a full split. But it's possible you can get there.
And I would get there faster if they could play Tchaikovsky while I'm trying to do my shit, while I'm trying to freak my shit on the bar. Okay. Well, I'm busting my shit open on the bar. Just play Tchaikovsky. Okay. Anyway. Yeah. I just think it's good for me. I think that type of music is good for me. It calms me.
Because I'm a very, I'm pretty high strung these days. I'm pretty high strung. I can't really, I can't really get my shit under control. The first order of business for real that I like to bring to y'all's plate is I need a man with a mustache to worship the ground. I walk on. Let me indulge you. I saw this TikTok, okay? And then I saw a YouTube short of the same sort of digital creator. And he was British. And he looks like Tom Selleck.
And he was doing like a running video, but it was like a meme. Can I say like one more time? I'm about to piss myself off. Caffeine's about to kick in. I'm going to watch this back and say, why? I need to go to a speech therapist. Like? But here's the thing too is like, okay. It's so ingrained in our vernacular. I can't stop saying it.
It's a crutch word. It's how I communicate. And now I'm hyper aware of it. And I'm going to struggle for the rest of this episode to not say like every fourth word. It's like when you become, it's like when you become aware that you're saying, uh, uh, uh, uh, shut up. Okay. What was I going to talk about? Oh yeah. This dude, I don't even know his name, but I saw him and I got pissed off because I was like, I was doing it.
I was doing so good. I'll come on this fucking podcast and speak into this very microphone that I'm speaking into right now and be like, men are the bane of society. The world would be better without fucking men. And then I see one video of a man with a mustache and I say, oh, Jesus. Men to me are like mythical creatures.
I do not interact with them in the wild. I leave them be. I don't really want to hear from them, but I will admire their beauty from afar. Okay, I see a young gentleman with a sort of really nice upper body build, beautiful hairline, great mustache. I'm looking.
I'm staring from across. I'm across the street and I'm staring at you like this. POV, you're a man with a mustache. I'm across the street. Okay. We lock eyes and I'm doing the Miley Cyrus stare with blue eyes. And then a bus passes in front of us. And then when the bus passes, I'm gone. That's how I feel towards men these days. I'm like, and then the bus passes and then I'm gone. And then he's like, what the fuck?
And he looks behind him. I'm behind him. But I never say anything. I'm sort of, I'm moaning Myrtle. I'm like floating around him in a circle. I'm Nosferatu. You will bounce on it. That audio is the funniest thing I've ever heard. Shout out to whoever made that. Shout out to the creator who made the POV Nosferatu saying, you will bounce on it. Okay.
Yeah, so just wanted to get that out of the way. I saw a TikTok this morning that about brought me to my knees. I need a man with a mustache. Bad, but not that bad. Not that bad. I'm not willing to do anything for it or risk anything for it. If it happens, it happens. Okay? And I can admire beauty when I see it, but I don't need to own it. I don't need to be in a situationship with it and have it lead me on and leave me. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Okay, moving on to what I really, really want to talk about. Now, here's the mother tucking meat and potatoes of the episode that I really wanted to get into.
Club, Book Club, Book Club. Okay, this is the Book Club episode where I didn't tell you what books to prepare for. So if you've read them, great. If you haven't, you should. That's sort of what the Broski Nation Book Club is. It could be any book in existence and you come to Book Club and I'm like, you did the assigned reading, right? And you're like, what assigned reading? And I'm like, that just docked you pay. That just docked you pay and food.
your rations were just slashed in half because you didn't read Sherlock Holmes. And did I ever tell you to read Sherlock Holmes? No, but you should just know to. Because I'm consistently sending out telepathic messages to all of Broski Nation. Okay? If you feel a brain zap one day, that's me trying to get in there. That's me trying to get up in there. And you're resisting. And for that, I'm cutting your pay.
If you're, my right temple is pulsing. That's me being like, Sherlock Holmes, Sherlock Holmes. You will bounce on it. And that's y'all resisting. Okay. That's me. If you see me appear to you in a dream, that's for real. I've taken on my final form, which is Nosferatu. This episode is sponsored by Sheet Geek.
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Let's get into it. The first book that I really want to talk about is, I recently was in, well, when I was in Paris, there is a super famous old bookstore, an English language bookstore called Shakespeare and Company. And you know how like every city has that, it's like the famous bookstore. In New York, it's the Strand bookstore.
One of them is called the strand. There's some other super famous ones in like London, uh, and Austin. There are some, and there's one super cool in downtown Los Angeles that it's,
I could describe it, but I don't know if you guys would know the name. It's like multiple stories and it's got an arch that's made of books. Anyway, you know, just like an iconic bookstore. Well, it's called Shakespeare and Company in Paris. And I went with my mom. There is a line out the door to get in, first of all. And I was like, well, what the fuck's so special about this place? It's got great history there. Walt Whitman, I believe, used to frequent it.
Now let me go ahead and fact check that. Shakespeare and Company. Why famous? I love why use many word when few word do trick. I'm more than I can do. My final four. I have a fuzzy mustache and glasses. A Harry Potter scar appears on my forehead. No, please. That's how I feel.
When you start quoting The Office, I've never even fucking seen The Office. That actually, I just pissed myself off. I just made myself very, very irrationally mad. Ignore that. Shakespeare and Company in Paris is famous for being a literary haven for writers and a center for innovative publishing. The store has been a refuge for generations of writers, including Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, and James Joyce. No fucking way.
It was originally opened in 1919. It closed in 1941 during the Nazi occupation of Paris. The current incarnation of the store opened in 1951 and was renamed Shakespeare and Company in 1964 by George Whitman. Okay, so is George Whitman Walt Whitman? Walter Whitman Jr. Okay, so that's actually not... Maybe George... Maybe it's his son. It's his sibling. George Whitman. It's his brother. How cool.
Oh, Captain, My Captain is by Walt Whitman. I had no fucking clue. I seriously had no fucking clue, y'all. Okay, back to Shakespeare and Company. So we go in and it's relatively pretty small. Like, it's not the biggest bookstore you've ever been in, but it's honestly a great collection of a bunch of different genres, both old and new. There's a whole separate section for, like, prose and theater and plays, music, and
And then there's a whole section for like children, young adult. And then there's mystery. Then there's philosophy and whatever. Then there's actually an upstairs area where you can just go read. And of course, there was a line to get up there too, which is also pressure. Like I'm sitting up here reading. I don't want, why is there a line of people coming up to be here? Like I have a time slot. And so we go in and I was looking for...
Some more Orwell. And I was also looking for, oh, I read this cute other book called Half a Soul. I'll get there in a second. But I was looking for some more books like that, you know, like a sort of romantic-y, but also any classics I could find if they were printed in a cool cover.
So I'm just sort of perusing, and I come across A Study in Scarlet, which is a Sherlock Holmes novella. One of the first major ones that sort of everything after that started the Sherlock Holmes franchise, so to speak. At least the massive popularity of it. A Study in Scarlet was published in 1887, I want to say. 1887, I'm a genius. It was published in 1887, and...
Honestly, so Arthur Conan Doyle, you hear about him a lot. He is Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. He's the famous creator of the Sherlock Holmes character and world. And he himself was a very interesting person, trained as a doctor. He was a military man as well. And a lot of the, I would say,
Of course, you know, you write what you know. A lot of the wherewithal that both Holmes and Dr. Watson have come from Arthur Conan Doyle, because of course they do. And the actual character of Sherlock Holmes and all of his eccentricities was based on an old professor that Arthur Conan Doyle had when he was in school. Just this sort of batty old professor who could make
incredible conclusions or deductions from the smallest of details. And that's sort of the whole idea of what Sherlock Holmes is. If you've never read any of his stories, if you've never seen the show or any of the movies, if you just know him as, you know, the silly character with a pipe and the little hat, it is so worth the read. Sherlock Holmes, y'all know that I love a quirky, hyper-intelligent protagonist, right?
And not in a sort of cringe way, but in a he's so genius, he's misunderstood type of way. I think those characters are so magnetic. And a few off the top of my head are sort of going to be like a Captain Jack Sparrow from Pirates of the Caribbean. Definitely like a Sherlock Holmes. Definitely like, I'm going to throw another Robert Downey Jr. in there. I'm actually going to, oh, Mando. Mandalorian's another one.
These characters that just seem to have all the answers. And even if they don't, they fake like they do, and then they figure it out. And they do that using the information available to them. At any given time, you're capable of... You know what? It's just... Okay, you get what I'm trying to say. So Arthur Conan Doyle creating Sherlock Holmes...
was a sort of passing, it was a short story at first that he published in either a newspaper or a magazine. People fucking loved it.
He was a man of many different disciplines. I mean, he lived many lives in the 60, 70 years that he lived. And just through all those different fields of study or interest, like chemistry, like medicine, like language, like travel, all of these things, he was very well-traveled.
Had a good grasp of understanding on the world. Later in his life, however, he had a very intense interest in spiritualism, which honestly, the more that I was reading about Arthur Conan Doyle, I was like, that makes so much sense because there is this sort of mysticism to Holmes where he is...
of course, a realist. And he's very tapped into human nature despite being so unhuman himself. He doesn't give into the temptations or even have the urges of a romantic relationship or any desires that the normal person would have of greed, envy, this, that. His mind rebels
at the idea of what a Victorian English society is, you know? And he was able to look at it with a critical eye while at the same time, because no human is truly black or white. It's very nuanced. He's able to look at society with a very critical eye and in fact, give more credibility to the lower classes than the upper classes because the lower classes, you know, he had a sense of shared value
shared sense of identity with them, I guess, where he was well-to-do because he was a detective, a private consulting detective, that he made a livable wage, of course, but
Yeah. I mean, I think he finds that there's a raw honesty and a respectable sort of struggle within the lower class that he was much more willing to take on those cases. Of course, with a shared interest in the upper nobility cases as well, because those are fucking tea. And across the board, human nature is the same. And those are sort of the conclusions that he's able to come to. It doesn't matter if you're rich, if you're poor, whatever. Human nature is human nature.
Conan Doyle's interest in spiritualism, while at the same time the natural sciences, whatever, make for a very interesting character because those two things are opposed. And the beautiful thing about Sherlock Holmes and the way that these stories are told is that it differs from the sort of contemporary detective novel of the time, which, by the way, most were written by women, love and love.
But there are two sort of distinctive ways of writing a detective novel. And there was the sort of archetype that a lot of these women followed. And then there was Arthur Conan Doyle's, which was told through the lens of Sherlock Holmes's counterpart, Dr. John Watson. And they come to know each other through a sort of seeking a roommate arrangement where they actually move in together. They meet each other and, uh,
get along quite well, move in. And Dr. Watson, who is an Afghan war veteran, used to be a doctor in the military, becomes taken with Holmes. He is a mystery to him. He's intrigued by Sherlock Holmes, his comings and goings. He starts studying him almost as a sort of patient. And all the while he's recording Holmes
The escapades that Holmes goes on, the cases that are brought to him, how he reasons through them using purely logic and observation. And Holmes' whole philosophy is you see, but you do not observe. And one of the examples that he gives, and I think it's Scandal in Bohemia, he says, how many times have you walked up the stairs, the staircase here at this apartment?
And Watson's like, hundreds of times. I mean, I lived here for, you know, however long. And Holmes goes, how many steps are on the staircase? And Watson's like, I don't fucking know. I didn't count. And he goes, oh, yes, exactly. That's it. You see, but you do not observe. A lot of the time, what Holmes's process is, is you take in the, I'm addicted to Sherlock Holmes. I have a tattoo about it. You take in the details of someone from the details of Holmes
markings on someone's skin, the state of their shoes, of the knees of their trousers for a man or the gloves of a woman, things like this, ink stains, anything like this can really give you insight into who is this person? What do they do? I've just met them. They're a stranger to me, but off the bat, give me five minutes of observation and I can tell you most likely their occupation, what
what troubles them. And as they're describing the predicament they're in, context clues of what they have on or the particular ways in which they're behaving can lend itself to you helping figure it out. You know what I mean? It's as much a game of criminal investigation as it is just deducing
human nature and how we lie we think we're really sneaky when we lie we're not you know if if to the trained eye you know when someone is lying and there's telltale signs so he incorporates all of these things and he reveals his method at the end so he here's an example as well i was like i love him so much dr watson and holmes uh are no longer roommates watson moves out he gets married
He comes back to visit Holmes and Holmes is, you know, a tweaker. Like always he's on Coke or he's doing this. He was addicted to opium. He's whatever. And he's, I've come across this incredible discovery. Just like super. I love a character like that. You know, he's not really there with you, but at the same time, he's very there. And, uh, Watson walks up the stairs. They haven't seen each other in a few months. And the first thing Holmes says is, uh,
You've gained weight. Seven and a half pounds. And I see you're back in practice. And, you know, something's up. And you've been experimenting with something. And Watson goes, how the fuck did you know that? Oh, and he said, you've been out in the country. It's been wet recently. Where did you go? And Watson's like, what the fuck? He had a top hat on that had a bulge in it at the top. A bulge.
slight smell of, I forget the exact term they use, but it's essentially like a cleansing agent, like a chloroform or like a formaldehyde type of smell that was used a lot back then in laboratories. And Holmes goes, I see what could only be a stethoscope.
hidden secretly in your top hat protruding and making a weird mark. You smell like whatever this chemical was that is used in medical offices. Your shoes have some scoring on them from where it looks like your housemaid tried to scrape off mud, but she's not skilled and so she scraped your shoes. There's still mud left on them. On top of that, something like one of your hands is more swollen than the other. It's all these different things.
where he's like, it's very easy, really, if you know what to look for. And of course, he has an existing relationship with Watson where he knows he's been a doctor, he just got married, all these things. So it's using logic as well as
deductive clues like he's married. Of course, he's probably put on some weight because when you're in a happy relationship, you probably gain weight. He's moved out, so he's no longer assisting Holmes in his investigations and getting some of that money. So he's supporting himself somehow. It must be through the medical profession because that's what he is. He's a doctor.
And so, you know, it's all these things where it all just comes together. But when he delivers that, I say you've gained weight and you're back in practice again. And I say there's some where he's like, I mean, it's just psychotic.
He's like, and the carriage that got here, the carriage that brought them here, the front left horse had a lame leg. And shit like that. And he sees it all from just the carriage wheel markings in the mud and how the horse was standing and holding his leg. Just shit like that where I'm like, okay, girl. It's fantastical because it's a book and it's fun to read. I don't know how realistic that is, but it definitely makes for a fun story. Anyway, I finished studying Scarlet.
And there is a whole collection of Sherlock Holmes novels. And
To be frank, Sherlock Holmes was a creation that Arthur Conan Doyle kind of came to resent. Sherlock Holmes kept the lights on for him, but he did not really enjoy returning to Holmes. He tried to kill him off. I mean, this isn't a spoiler because this book is about 200 years old almost. He kills off Holmes and his greatest adversary, Professor Moriarty.
But then later, at the request of, I think, one of the publication houses, or just the fan base, I guess, revived him. And started writing some form of prequel books to his death, like some additional stories right before he died, and things like that. It's definitely interesting to think, what an incredible character...
that he created inspired by someone he knew in his real life and elements of himself. What an incredibly interesting thing. And the reason it works, okay, let's break this down. The reason that it works is because Sherlock Holmes' escapades are told to you through the lens of awe of Dr. Watson.
Dr. Watson is so taken by Holmes, both in a sort of, this guy's really fucking weird sort of way. And also he is just in constant awe of the talent and skill and intellect that Holmes possesses.
And so the publications of, you know, The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes are detailed in the diary and journals of Dr. Watson. And he recalls where they were, what Holmes was wearing, where Holmes disappeared to, and when he came back, and what he was doing, and what they talked about, and all this. I think that that really gives Holmes an air of mystery. And you would not be able to get that same air of mystery if it was written from Holmes's perspective. Right.
And I think that's what a lot of other detective novels do. And I'm not going to say that that's what they get wrong, but I'm going to say that's what makes Arthur Conan Doyle's work stand out, is that here is this intriguing, mysterious...
elusive figure that you want desperately to know more about. But you can only know as much as Dr. Watson gives you because it's really limited to the interactions they have. We don't have a firsthand account. He even says that in some of these stories. It was months in between me seeing Holmes and other than the occasional murder scene
Case solved in the paper. He didn't know what Holmes was up to. And it's a fun check-in every time they get back together and Watson joins him on another adventure is what's he into now? What's he been studying lately? What's new? How have world crises changed it? You know, if he writes in any of the wars or,
Whatever. So it's just very, I am loving it. Okay. I love Sherlock Holmes. This episode is sponsored by ZocDoc. Why is it that when we need a new doctor, our first instinct is to post in that group chat, anybody know a good PCP or OBGYN? I'm guilty of doing it. But I always end up finding out that the recommendation is not in network or the office is too far from my house. Enter ZocDoc. ZocDoc.
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And this was another, because I read like an introduction to one of these books. One of the people who wrote the introduction said something to the effect of, it is quite often the works that took minimal effort, almost a lazy sort of effort.
versus the works that you pour your heart and soul into. The relationship that those two variables have to commercial success is
It is astounding how the least amount of effort you put in, those go, those are what do well. And I, that really struck a chord with me because I remember during 2020 or even 2019, like when TikTok had just happened and I was just posting shitty little stupid videos and people were loving them, I would sit down and be like, okay, I'm going to take this shit serious.
Right after I got fired, I got my first brand deal. I was like, okay, here we go. I'm locking in. I would write out skits or I would find one of those stupid AR filters and write an entire skit around it. I would write bullet points down, multiple different alternate takes of the whatever, and I would film it and edit it and upload it. And that wouldn't do as well as me being on the toilet being like, I'm shitting my fucking brain.
and then me burping. Like those would do millions and then be doing an actual skit, you know? And that's not to say that some of the skits didn't do well as well, but it was just this, I remember being so frustrated or even tweets. Like I would tweet and be like,
something really stupid and that would go viral. And then I'd actually sit down and think of a punchline and my comedian friends would be like, this is so funny. And then the general public would be like, not loving this one. And I remember being like, am I just an idiot? Am I not that funny? But no, it's something to be said about. I think when you reach the most people
And unfortunately, as we know, the sort of general voting populace is quite stupid. I think it's that. I think Arthur Conan Doyle wanted to make these hyper-intellectual novels about shit no one cared about. No one gives a fuck. But it was important to him. And so he wrote that shit for himself and probably for other academics in his community who were interested in spiritualism and whatever. No one gives a fuck, okay? Okay.
He wrote Sherlock Holmes as a sort of, yeah, give this to whatever. And then it had immense success. And he was almost pissed off that that's what struck the fancy of the public and not this actual work that he cared about. And I would say, by and large, most artists have that experience where it's like, really? This is what y'all are liking? That's my least favorite thing I've ever made. But this kept Holmes' light, or Holmes, this kept Arthur Conan Doyle's lights on.
It paid him very well. He lived a very comfortable life. So yeah, I don't know. It's a very interesting thing. So I bought Study in Scarlet, finished it in what, two, three days. Love. Love. And I think also, I mean, you know, the older you get, you never stop meeting yourself. You never stop meeting yourself and finding out things about you and who you are and what you like. And I've always had a flair for maximalism.
If you can't tell, I love just like almost annoying things.
superfluous, ostentatious maximalism. Gilded ceilings, suede velvet walls with paintings everywhere and wainscoting and this and that. That's the sort of interior that I like. I like art that's maximalist and impressionist and hyper-realist and this and that. Books and prose like this are
As it tells a story, because there's two different sides of it, right? I always think Arthur Conan Doyle or a compelling adventure novel from the 19th century is different in terms of like being verbose than like 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. If y'all ever had to read that book in school, oh my fucking God, who gives a shit?
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea, I'm talking like 75 pages straight of describing kelp. It was so verbose, it like pissed me off. So there's a balance, right, of maximalism and of using the English language as a form of an artistic medium. The way that an artist paints onto a canvas
to create something that is artistic and beautiful. An author uses the English language or whatever language to do the same in literature. And it really takes an artist to craft a story in a way that is compelling, makes me want to read it to the very end, and incorporates just honestly really great language.
Because you can read as many romance novels as you want, but I don't know if that's improving your brain, if that's creating neural pathways in your brain. I read books like this and I finish it and I'm like, that was compelling. It kept my attention and I learned something along the way. I keep my phone nearby as I'm reading these because I've got that dictionary app open. I am dictionary apping it.
I'm probably the number one user of the dictionary app. Like, I think that as time progresses, and of course, Arthur Conan Doyle was an English author. The sort of choices that an English author uses is,
to write a story versus what an American author uses, of course, they're distinct. They're not that different, but it's noticeable for me. It makes me glad that I have at least a sort of contextual understanding of how they spoke because otherwise, if I was just reading this like raw-dogging Sherlock Holmes and I wasn't familiar with British culture or especially Victorian culture, I'd be like, what?
Why do they talk like that? Like, it does not make sense. But of course, that's one of my special interests is etymology and how syntax and grammar and all these things come to be and how they come to be out of fashion and how we change and swap things out to make it more modern and, you know, what our vernacular is and how, you know, we lost the British you and like color and glamour.
Actually, it's still in Glamour. But you know what I mean. Why do these changes happen and what is the significance of them? And it's very interesting to read these because it's so indicative of its time. And I love that. I want to feel like I am existing in the world that Holmes is in. And I think Doyle did a great job of really throwing you headfirst into nasty Victorian London. And that's another thing that he gets praised for is
he's not showing you like, like for example, there's a Sherlock Holmes short called scandal and Bohemia, which Bohemia is now, uh, uh, I believe it's in the Czech Republic, but it's been owned by a few, you know, it's,
Kind of like a Texas. Like Texas has been owned by so many different countries and now it's Texas. But now Bohemia is in the Czech Republic. Anyway, there is a story where the king of Bohemia comes to consult Sherlock Holmes because there is a compromising photograph of him and a woman. And he needs Holmes' help locating the photograph and destroying it.
Because so as it cannot be used as blackmail later. It shows the scandal of the upper, you know, nobility and things like that where these matches must be handled privately, you see. It shows that while at the same time showing the really dirty, unseen corners of Victorian London. Like I mentioned earlier, sort of like the opium crisis that was happening and other sort of
just taboo things. They talk about brothels and some known streets where madams are and, and
you know, the sort of underbelly of London, of industrial London that is not, it's not a shining example of what the British Empire wanted to be known for, you know? And I think that it's an important choice that Doyle made to be like, this is what I want to talk about. And it's shocking and it's real. And although these stories are set, they're fictitious stories, they're in a very real circumstance and a very real narrative context.
So I really, I appreciate that because, yeah, I don't want to hear about how fucking great the British Empire is. I want to know about how it sucked and the forgotten corners of it. Another thing I was going to say about Holmes is he's so incredibly, beautifully critical of Victorian society and, you know, how people compose themselves and behave, while at the same time being a loyalist to the king.
Very complex, very nuanced, very, you know, you want to love Holmes and all of his eccentricities, but that's one I can't really get behind. And it's at odds with everything about Holmes. You know, he's always, I don't know, just to be for father and country. It's just a crazy choice, which makes me think, was Arthur Conan Doyle a monarchial loyalist? Who's to say? Okay, anyway, here are some other...
Just book-related things that I kind of wanted to get into. Another thing I learned from Sherlock Holmes, again, just like a living and mentally living in this Victorian time, women who have been married would sign their name like this. So let's say...
Who the fuck am I marrying? Sort of like a Killian Murphy type situation, okay? So this would be how I would type my name if I was recently married in Victorian London. If you guys care. Brittany... Sorry, if I was recently married to Killian Murphy in Victorian London, okay? Brittany Murphy. Nay. Broski.
Okay, that is how it keeps your maiden name. So it's not confusing. Now, listen to this. Then I started to wonder, did this come from... Because ne means born, which honestly makes sense because in Spanish, it's nathi. Like I was born here or I was born this name. I was born whatever, nathi. This is, to me, when I hear ne, I think of someone being like,
Spoiled. Nay. Rotten. You know what I mean? Where it's like you have a word and then you've thought of a better word or you've thought of a contracting word or contradicting word and you say, nay, this. But it's not because that's spelled N-A-Y. So I don't know why I brought that up because I thought they'd be related and they're not. Okay? So that's a cute little fun fact for you guys. Okay, here are two other books that I want to talk about very quickly. Okay.
I finished this book that was just a cute little recommendation from TikTok called Half a Soul. Oh my God. Y'all, five stars. Five stars. It's a standalone book. This author... So this book is a Regency fairy tale. Hey, I'm locked the fuck in. Regency era fairy... My penis just got hard. My dick just got hard because the wire just hit. You know what I'm saying?
This book was so fucking cute. It was so well written. It is about Regency era London where this family lives in the countryside and they're brought to London for what's that called? For the season and the time. It's very Bridgerton coded. Okay. Uses all the same terms, all the same sort of social terms.
expectations and faux pas, whatever. It kept my attention the whole time. It is a, not enemies to lovers, but I would say it's a sort of strangers to lovers, strangers to friends, to close confidant to lovers. And it's just a very, very,
simple, well-written story. The magic is easy to understand. They play with different realms without it being too overwhelming. The love story is so cute. It's not smutty. It's just a cute little story. And I was like, oh my God, I wish these characters would continue into a second and third book, and they don't. But this author, let me look up her name. This author does a series called Regency Fairy Tales. And so there's other characters
Olivia Atwater. So there's other stories, but they don't have my beloved characters who are named Dora and Elias, Lord Solcier, Elias. Anyway, this book, I cannot recommend it enough. If you're looking for just a short little palate cleansing read, loved this, loved it. I also read...
Let's talk about this for a second, okay? I will not be reading Onyx Storm. And let me tell you why. Not a big fan of Rebecca Yaros as a person. Some of her politics are kind of concerning to me. And then I have heard nothing but negative reviews about Onyx Storm. They're saying that this feels like they're calling it the ninth Star Wars movie.
They're saying it's very bad, very bad. And I was like, I don't want to spend $30 fucking dollars on a hardback copy of Onyx Storm just for it to piss me off. People are saying that it is no more storyline than Iron Flame, which is about to piss me off because Iron Flame was bad.
It felt like she wrote herself into a wall when it came to the magic system. I don't know how your magic system works because you don't know how your magic system works. How am I supposed to follow along with you? What the fuck is a ward? What is a ward? And then the dragons are mad at each other and then they're mad at each other and then they're fucking and then they're horny and then they're, but they won't fuck. And then I also saw some spoilers because who gives a fuck that she writes it in like a Gen Z vernacular.
That part. That's not how I expected my Monday to go. Like that type of shit where I'm like, I don't want to. This is a romantic. Put me in that world. I'm trying to escape from my world. I don't want to read TikTok language on my fucking book for that reason.
It doesn't expand upon the narrative that the cliffhanger left us on an iron flame. It's more miscommunication trope, which is my worst... It is my least favorite thing you could ever put in a book. It's two characters willfully misunderstanding each other with no conflict resolution skills. That's going to piss me off. I don't even know if... I think I was seeing some notes about it being smutty, but it's like almost forced. Like it felt... I just...
I'm not interested. And that is such a shame because I really enjoyed Fourth Wing. I think it set up a beautiful world and a cool place for the story to go. There was some unnecessary tragedy in Iron Flame, Onyx Storm. I really don't. I'm not interested. And it's so thick. And so I'm seeing these people finish the book and be like, what the fuck happened?
And that is a poorly written book. If you're at the end of the book, like, what the fuck did I just read? That's bad. And then I saw another stat the other day that was like, Onyx Storm is the fastest selling book in the last 20 years. And I was like, what the?
What a fucking joke. So I'm not really interested. If y'all are, well, what's her on Extorba? Not reading it. I don't really give a shit. Okay. Some other things really, really quick. I went to Fashion Week. What the fuck? Who let me into Fashion Week? I went with Patu.
The most fun you could ever think of. Went with Patu. They dressed me and my mom so sweet. We had a blast. It's also, can I just say, like as a child of Tumblr, where I've been exposed to like Jean Paul Gaultier, Runway 2003, fucking all that shit since Tumblr and thinking like,
This feels like a different world. I will never be in this world, especially as a bigger person. It is psychotic to now be like, I'm sitting front row at some of these shows. Patu is, I love Patu. I felt like a bad bitch in that outfit.
And it's so playful and fun and it plays with shapes and textures and Zooey Deschanel was there and Mindy Kaling. And it's just cool. It was very, very cool. And I'm just shocked that I'm in that conversation. You know what I mean? I'm so grateful. I had such a fucking blast. But yeah, that was something that...
Shout out, Patu, for being size inclusive because that's a big thing. We've been talking about this for a while, me and Team Broski. I've always been interested in fashion and fashion.
It's fun. Fashion is fun. It's fun to take risks in and do something interesting. No one wants to see you in a bodycon dress on the fucking carpet, girl. Give us something and some fun glam. Like, that's why people gag for chapels because here's someone with a fucking vision. Here's someone with a vision. Please, God.
So I think that's, it's fun. You know, like when I do a carpet, when I did the wicked carpet or gladiator or any of the star Wars carpets I've been to play with that, don't make it a costume, but play with it as a sort of visual inspiration. And me and my stylist cats, Paul does. We fucking eat. It is fun.
And I'm not really worried about being like the most glamorous on the carpet. I want to be the most interesting, like, but with a very polished taste level. That's where I'm coming from. Growing up and trying to find brands that, first of all, even give a shit about big fat bitches like me.
It's like, I can't understand for the life of me why it's so fucking hard. Just make it a little bigger. It's because some of these companies have a complex about dressing fat bodies and they need to get over it. It's really nasty.
So, shout out to Patu because they have a pretty size inclusive range. I was shocked that it fit me and I was like, this is great. So, I think more of these designer houses need to, oh my God, Gautier actually did a, they had a bigger girl in their runway show. And I was like, my God, no.
It's just awesome. It's awesome to see because... And I don't want to say this in a way that pits bodies against each other. That's not what I mean by this. But what I mean to say is sometimes a garment can be sold better if it's on a curvy body. I believe it. You know what I mean? It's all the sensual essence of a woman in couture like that or in...
a gown or a garment that just, there's something about a fuller body that shows it off. You know what I mean? Like the beautiful shapes and textures. And I think that for whatever reason, we're back in this like Kate Moss, Coke head runway model era where it's all about getting thin, get skinny, get skinny, get skinny. And I don't know if that's
You know, like it's we're just really not in a mental headspace right now as a country to bring that back when, you know, it's just overwhelming and exhausting all the time. Eggs are about to be $15 a carton and gas is going to be $150 to fill up your fucking tank. And it's just like, and we're having an ED crisis on top of that. Give me a fucking break.
So, I don't know. The one good thing I will say about whatever the fuck is about to happen politically and in the country is hopefully recession pop is back. Bring back recession pop. We need to get back into the club. I've been seeing a lot of sort of, you know, we're all in agreement here that when shit like this happens, there needs to be an outlet of joy. There needs to be an outpouring of love in a community and celebrating life and
with people that give a shit about you. And then we tackle the problems of tomorrow together. You know what I mean? Like it goes hand in hand. It can't just all be doom scrolling and fucking this country's all the time. Like find pockets of joy for yourself. So I will leave you with that. And I want to say the song of the week is one second. Okay, I've got two songs of the week. One of them is Café Con Ronde.
Borda by Bonnie. And the other one is Arms Length by Sam Fender. Those are my two songs of the week. Sam Fender going on tour. Okay, I love you guys. If you want merch, go to broski.shop. That's pretty much all I have to say. Go watch Royal Court. Go watch Royal Court. Please go watch it. Go subscribe to it. I'm not joking anymore. Okay, love you guys. Bye.