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Direct from the Broski Nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California, this is the Broski Report with your host, Brittany Broski. Whippin' that bitch like a rental. I'm draggin' my nuts, got my dick out the dirt. Y'all know that song? Guys! Guess who they let back in the United Mother-Tucking States of America? Me! Me!
Y'all, for a f***ing two weeks, this has been, oh my god, oh my god, so much has happened in the last, what, not even 14 days? I guess it has been 14 days. Oh my sweet lord. Y'all need to strap in for what I'm about to lay on you, okay?
Have mercy. Okay, let's start with you're looking at a woman that is one less organ than now I was two weeks ago. Okay, what the fuck? You always hear, oh, she had her gallbladder out. She had her pancreatic removal surgery. It went great. Who the fuck is that ever about? Because you think it's not going to be you. You know what I mean? Oh, it's now about me.
Gallbladder surgery? Goofy ass surgery. What the f- Oh, I tore my, I tore my nabiscus. I tore my, I tore my hibiscus muscle during bar method because I was going so hard because I'm so ripped and muscled that it just snapped. It's never that. It's, she had her gallbladder out. What the fuck? Goofy ass surgery is that?
I'm humiliated! Unserious ass surgery, bro. Except it was very serious. It was actually kind of like really super scary. Okay, let's talk about it, I guess. Why are you wondering I got here? Rewind the clock two weeks. I'm in Rome, Italy. By the way, I literally got back last night. So this is hot off the motherfucking press for y'all. Okay, so I'm on a family vacation.
All goes well. We start in Paris and we take the Orient Express from Paris to Verona, Italy. One of the most magical experiences ever. It is an overnight train and you literally wake up in the Swiss Alps. Like it is just, it's psychotic.
It's something that was a real bonding experience for me and my whole family. It was so neat. And it's such a unique preservation that they've done of these train cars. I mean, from the 20s and 30s, they've restored them to their original artisan craftsmanship. And the original, it's like the grandsons of the guys who made the cars or the ones who serviced them. It's spectacular, okay? Not to nerd out, but like, wow. Definitely.
dining cars, bar car. It was amazing. Okay. We get off the train in Verona.
Walk around for a little bit. Shout out Verona, Italy, which has the, and I might be wrong, second largest Roman amphitheater ever found besides the Colosseum. Okay. Amphitheater meaning two theaters. Amphi meaning two, right? Like amphibian. So second largest Roman amphitheater ever found. Really, really neat. They do like opera concerts there now. We walked around the city in literally an hour and a half.
I'm, this episode is going to have some severe Roman Empire undertones, by the way. It's on, it's fresh on the mind. I also started reading Song of Achilles. Okay, I'll get back to my gallbladder in a second. Started reading Song of Achilles. What? We'll get there, okay? But the Roman Empire weaves its way into this story, so mind you. We get out in Verona, really cute town, old as fuck. Every city in Italy is old as fuck.
And they're like, and this building was built, when can I remember? 1200 AD. What the fuck are you talking about? That's not real. Made up year. So then we take a commuter train from Verona to Rome. We have a beautiful time in Rome. It rains the whole time, but it honestly was super aesthetic, super ambient. Okay.
do a walking tour of Colosseum, of the Roman Forum, of all these magnificent places. I've been to Rome before, probably 10 years ago. This was, to see it through like adult eyes and as an appreciator of history and someone who sees history as not only a direct informer of how we behave today, but of like what could have been. Oh, it was just, it was psychotic. Me and my brother were geeking, tweaking out.
We do all that, whatever. It's the final day. We're supposed to leave for the airport at five. Okay. This is on Saturday morning. We're supposed to leave 5 a.m. Well, around 1 a.m. my tummy starts to rumble. Okay. And not only does my tummy start to rumble, my mouth starts to water. And I said, I know what this is. So I'm nauseous. I go and puke in the bathroom and it does not stop.
And usually when I have food poisoning, I have given it to myself by eating, I don't know, rice or pasta that's been left out or, you know, eating at some unsavory places because I, at the core of my being, want to be Anthony Bourdain. And so I get real adventurous with food. My tummy can't handle it, girl. My tummy's like, and then I spew from both ends. All that to say, I know what food poisoning feels like. I know what it sounds like in my body. I'm well acquainted with it.
This was different, okay? I start puking and it does not stop. And immediately after puking, this intense pain in my upper abdomen starts. And it's something I have never experienced in my life. I mean, it felt, when they say knives in your stomach, when they say writhing in pain, there is not a better descriptor. There's not a more apt description than what that experience was.
Nothing would relieve it. I couldn't lay flat. I couldn't use my abdominal muscles to get up. It was horrible. I couldn't lay on my side. After a while of getting up and down, up and down, the nausea wouldn't stop.
My mom, bless her, she stayed behind because I was like, I'm not making it on that plane, girl. So my dad, brother, and sister went home and my mom stayed behind and got me some Italian version of gas X. I was popping that. I think it's called geffer. They call that shit geffer. I was huffing the geffer. I'm a geffer queen, okay?
I took it, like you drink it, you mix it with water, and it helped with the nausea, but the pain would not go away. I was doing Tylenol. Thank God I always traveled with Tylenol and ibuprofen. It was the only thing that could, like, it still hurt, but I could, like, drift off to sleep a little bit until the Tylenol would wear off, and then I would be brought back to life.
the suffering reality of my abdominal pain. After a while where I was like, this is not normal. It's been 24 hours. It's not going away. The pain then spread to under my right rib cage.
And it got hard to breathe. And that's when I started to freak the fuck out. I don't smoke weed. I don't smoke cigarettes. I don't do anything that involves my lungs because there is nothing scarier to me. Like very genuinely, nothing is scarier than not being able to breathe, not being able to take a full breath, not being able to meter your breathing. And so when I couldn't do that, I was like, absolutely fucking not.
I called my doctor back in America. And luckily with the time difference, they were up and the hospital answered and they were like, here's what I recommend.
He said, describe exactly where the pain is. I was like, you know, it's right under my right rib cage and it's piercing, stabbing pain. I cannot lay. I cannot do anything. I can't even take a full breath. He goes, okay, that sounds like your gallbladder. And I said, what the hell is that? Of course, I've heard of a gallbladder before, but not in my body. Not on me.
He was like, sounds like either your gallbladder or your pancreas. Because I had WebMD'd myself down a hole and I had diagnosed myself as having pancreatic cancer, of course. And so he was like, sounds like your gallbladder. I said, you sure, doc? It sounds like pancreatic cancer to me. He said, no, it's probably your gallbladder. And he was like, okay, here's what I would recommend.
you need to go to an English-speaking hospital nearby, and you really need to get this checked out. And I was like, hospital? Bro, what the fuck? This can't wait until I'm back in the States. Fast forward, no, it could not wait. So what I actually was about to experience was acute cholestestitis. Acute cholestestitis.
an inflammation of the gallbladder, typically caused by a gallstone blocking the cystic duct. So here's what I've come to learn about gallbladders. I'm super versed in it now. Gallstones develop on their own and they can be unproblematic until they are. What happened in my gallbladder, so the gallbladder produces bile and bile sits in your stomach and helps digest the food that you eat. My gallbladder had been blocked, okay?
That's what was causing the sharp pain. And not only was there a blockage, it was perforated. The walls were super thick. It was inflamed and necrosis had set in. Oh, okay. What the fuck are you talking about? All of that happened. We made the decision to go to the hospital because I was like, this pain is, it is unimaginable. We went in, I described all my symptoms and
And to the doctor, the Italian doctor, God bless. The name of the hospital I went to, and I'm about to say everyone by name because they were so fantastic. This hospital was, I mean, truly, how scary is it to be in a foreign country? You don't speak the language. And now you're being told you have to undergo a surgery. This hospital was so lovely to me. In the grand scheme of things,
I was like go time decision mode when it came time to, you know, have this conversation with the doctors. But like grand scheme of things, God, it was terrifying. But I wasn't really terrified in the moment. So I go into the doctor and he's like, you know, what's wrong? We just went to the ER. And I was like, food poisoning. I gave myself food poisoning. You know, we had sushi. I had tuna. Like it was raw. I don't know whatever. He goes, what, what is wrong?
And I was like, oh, food poisoning. He goes, no, no, no, no. Tell me what is wrong. And I said, okay. So you have a good point. I said, I have abdominal pain. I've been vomiting, but no diarrhea. Sorry to get super graphic. Do y'all care about me or not? No diarrhea. And he said, that's a telltale sign that it's not food poisoning. Because it would be evacuating the premises at all costs if it was food poisoning. This is actually going to be something completely different.
And so he goes, okay, lay down and I'm going to do an abdominal exam. So I lay down off the Tylenol, off the PERC 30, Tylenol 500 milligram. And for the first time ever, I could lay flat because I was on so much Tylenol. I'm overstimulated.
I'm overstimulated right now, by the way. There's a screech in my throat. I got scritches in my throat. The lawn guys are doing that out there. It's hot in here. My water's lukewarm. There's a lot going on. I feel really actually overstimulated as fuck right now. But I'm going to power through. And so he tells me to lay down and then he does an abdominal exam. And when he pushed on my gallbladder, I fucking God, I wanted to scream. And he goes, okay.
We're going to have you do an ultrasound. And I'm not joking. When we showed up to this hospital, no one was there. No one. There was one other person in the waiting room and it was an old guy with his wife. We were seen immediately. It was the doctor and then nurses who took all my vitals and did whatever. I was in an ultrasound within two hours, maybe an hour and a half.
And she did the ultrasound and sure enough on the monitor, you can see little gallstones. Oh, okay. And so she goes, this looks like inflammation of the gallbladder. We're going to send you to have a CT scan.
What the fuck, bitch? I've never been a sickly person, okay? I've never had to do the in and out of hospitals, doing this, doing all these scans and whatever. I've never had to do it. Thank God. I mean, I've been so lucky. And to me, that's always been like, you know, oh, you hit 55 and you start doing all that stuff.
This was very scary as like a 27 year old, relatively healthy person. Like I really take care of myself. At least I try to. This was like, bitch, what the? So did the CT scan. They don't tell you about a CT scan that they, it's, it was all IV. It was all intravenous, intravenous.
They put this solvent or whatever through the IV and she goes, bless her, because she spoke broken English. She was speaking Italian. She goes, going to be hot. And I said, oh, just like the temperature of the room? Okay, it's no worries. I can sweat. I sweat all the time. She puts that shit in my, my God, it was the weirdest feeling. So did the IV, puts me in the CT scan where it's, it's over, you know, it's circling around you.
When that shit, when it, the machine mixed with whatever the fuck was in my veins, it burned. It was hot. I literally, I felt like such a puss because she warned me going to be hot. I go, like a baby. And then from the fucking mic speaker in the room, she goes, are you all right? And I said, yeah. Humiliating. But they do that, I guess, so it illuminates the veins and you can see
The inflammation, I don't know. Regardless, got out of the CT scan and they were like, yeah, it's bad. They show all these images to the doctor. We wait around. They decide to admit me and they start administering antibiotics. I'm thinking, oh, okay, it's just inflamed. Give me some antibiotics. I'll probably be here overnight. They'll release me tomorrow. We can leave the next day. Well, girl, later that night, the doctor comes in
The same one, God bless him, Dr. Carlo. Dr. Carlo Consani. By the way, this hospital was UPMC Salvatore Mundi International Hospital in Rome. Spectacular, fantastic care. And shout out Dr. Carlo because he for real was like,
Tell me what is wrong, not you diagnosing yourself. You know, like I want to see it all laid out so I can properly diagnose. And he did. He came in and he was like, here's the deal. Gull water, super inflamed. The walls are super thick. You have a blockage. Now we have two options. We can keep you here for four or five days. Five days?
Just pump you full of antibiotics and you can have the surgery when you're back in America. And I go, okay, hold on one second. The surgery? What do you mean? Like to remove the gallstone? He said, no, no, no. To remove your gallbladder. I say, all right. Could you just go ahead and point one more time to where that is on my body? Because I'm not really understanding.
I asked him to pull up one of those like infographic charts on the wall. I'm like, could you just point to where on my body where it would be? Okay, I get it now. I get it now. Thank you. And so he comes in, he goes, that's option one. Option two, the surgeon is going to come in in a little bit. And like most surgeons do, he's going to tell you, you need surgery. I would hear him out because it's a lot worse than I initially thought. And I'm like, okay, the surgeon comes in.
And he's immediately like, we need to do this tomorrow. He said, it is super inflamed. There is a blockage and I cannot put you on a plane in good conscience. He goes, I understand. You know, I know this is scary. You probably want to do this in America, but I really recommend you do it here. I'm like, okay. So I'm on the phone with my dad back in the States.
My mom is there with me. I've talked to both the doctor, the surgeon, and I call my American doctor. And I'm like, here's the status. Here's what they're telling me. What do you recommend? Because ultimately, you know, you listen to everyone's advice, but you have to weigh it all. And it's your decision ultimately. And that's what Dr. Carlos said. He was like, it's your choice. It's your body. You do what you think is best. I called my American doctor and he goes, you really need to do it there. And I go, okay.
That's the decision, I guess. And so the next morning early, like 7.30 a.m., the surgeon and Dr. Carlo come in and they're like, well, what do you think? What have you decided? And I go, let's do it. Let's do it here. Girl, I was, that was probably what, 7.38? I was under anesthesia by 12.45. It was immediate.
And it's such a blessing because as I was running around doing all the tests, like the CT scan and whatever, the hospital was packed. It was packed. Not an open seat in the waiting room. And so what was... It just feels... This whole experience felt so like... Okay, it was at the tail end of my vacation. It was...
I had a quiet day in the hospital and they were able to operate immediately. Like all of these things lined up. I feel so fortunate and so blessed that it was just like, this is happening now. It's happening now. They take me in, they do it laparoscopically. So right now I have about five wounds on my stomach where laparoscopic surgery, by the way, is a marvel of modern medicine. I mean, I'm
one to marvel at the, in awe of human innovation always. And this is one of those things. It's literally robot surgery. They did surgery on a grape. They did surgery on Brittany Broski. They did robot surgery on Brittany Broski. It was crazy. I was watching these videos, not on me, because hey, I'm going to vomit. I was watching these animated videos of what a laparoscopic gallbladder removal surgery looks like.
It might as well have been magic. It looked like magic. It is amazing what they can do. By the way, this was only like first properly characterized and described in like 1934. So this has been around less than 100 years that this was even a problem point that they know how to fix. So whatever. They do the surgery. Everything goes fine. They do anesthesia via IV. Hey, what?
What the fuck? There's nothing scarier. There's nothing scarier. One minute I'm awake, next minute, dead. Dead in the fucking water. Girl, the next thing I know, I woke up. And it was immediate. My teeth are...
I don't know what it is. I started looking up all these symptoms of, you know, coming out of anesthesia and it can last for weeks after you go under general anesthesia where all these side effects can happen. And mine was teeth chattering. They put a breathing tube down my throat, which is so scary. And I was coughing because I imagined them like ripping it out of my throat really fast. That's how it felt.
my fucking head lolled back down. I was coughing so bad. And then I started to cry just because of course I did. And one of the sweet Italian nurses, old woman, she goes, don't cry. Don't cry. And I was like, yeah, lady, I didn't want to. I'm humiliated. I'm trying. She goes, don't cry, not cry. And I was like, yeah, you're so right.
And so I bossed up, stopped crying, but I was shivering so bad and I wasn't cold. I don't know what it was. And so they put a space blanket on me under my hospital blanket and then they wheeled me back into my room and my mom got it on video. I immediately in my hospital bed, I said, ciao, in front of all these lovely Italian people, ciao, making fun of their language. What the fuck?
me off the PERC 30 anesthesia. Ciao, Bella. Oh, Bella. Ciao, Bella. Ciao, Bella. Ciao, ciao. And so we, they will be back in and Dr. Carlo is in the corner and he's watching me and he's like, okay, all good. And I give him a thumbs up and then he comes over and he goes, you made the absolute right decision. And I, and I was kind of out of it still, but my mom caught it. And he goes, if this would have been 24 hours later, would have been a much different story.
And I was kind of still out of it. And I was like, okay, good. Like that relief came over me of like that needed to happen. I'm glad that I made that decision. Well, later that day, one of the surgeons, his name was Dr. Papa Luigi. Shout out. Or wait, Luigi Papa. Dr. Luigi Papa. Dr. Papa comes in and he was like,
Oh, girl, gutted, rotted, like truly necrosis. Like it was so much worse than we thought. They pulled it out and they told me that truly, like if I would have gotten on that plane, if I would have been like, just pump me full of antibiotics, put me on the plane, my gallbladder probably would have burst midair. Hey, that's terrifying.
it would have ruptured, which is so scary because then bile goes everywhere and then you're dealing with sepsis and infection. It was just horrible. So thank God I decided to have it done there. And then I was in the hospital for two more days after that because they were administering me antibiotics via the IV. I had this drainage tube out of my gut. What the fuck? I had a sack.
I had a sack! They gave me a sack! And when I had to go to the bathroom, I had to go in a sack! The surgery, one of the nurses came in and I go, "Uh, pee-pee." She goes, and holds her finger up to me, leaves the room, comes back with a bedpan, and I'm not joking, a doggy piss pad. Put the piss pad on the bedpan, told me to lift my butt up, and I had peed on the pad. Just on a pad, just on a pad like a puppy. And I have a-- Oh!
Every time after that, I'd have to use the bathroom. I had to get up out of the hospital bed with these fresh stitches and take my little drainage sack and hold it. It was so annoying. And it's also just frustrating, like not being mobile, you know, like not being able to move how you usually do. It was just like, I was getting so frustrated. Um, and so they eventually removed my tube, my sack tube. And, uh,
I didn't feel any pain after the surgery, which is such a miracle. It was just antibiotics they were giving me and I couldn't eat normal. They fed me like bread and the most bland chicken soup you've ever, ever one could imagine.
Just to make sure, they did that just to make sure that things were going smoothly. I wasn't nauseous. It wasn't putting too much strain on that newly formed track that my digestive system has to go through now. It's now double hard on my liver, which kind of sucks because no alcohol for a month, no fatty foods probably ever because my body just can't handle it. So it's, yeah, it's stuff like that that
You know, you think it won't happen to you until it does. And it's very scary. And I'm so thankful that I had my mom there and the doctors were amazing. There was a nurse named Ilaria. Shout out Ilaria. She used to live in Ireland. That's my queen. All the nurses were so kind and so attentive. And the room was private. I had a balcony. I mean, it was just when socialized medicine works. So they discharged us.
From the hospital on Wednesday morning, and I wasn't cleared to fly until Sunday. So I literally got back yesterday, last night at like 8 p.m., and I had a post-op appointment today where they did my blood work and whatever, and I'm fine. Everything is fine. It's just...
I'm exhausted, obviously, from jet lag and from having a surgery. I have to give myself these weird, which I guess is normal after any surgery, these weird anti-blood coagulant shots. And they're self-administered and I hate doing it. But I don't want blood clots, bro. So I have to do that. But honestly, guys, to make a long fucking story short...
I am minus one gallbladder plus one Harry Styles cover release. Okay, so with that, let's go ahead and transition to talking about the music. Thank you so much. This episode is sponsored by Hungry Root. When it comes to grocery shopping and meal planning, I've got a problem. I've got a super restrictive diet that makes grocery shopping miserable, but that all changed thanks to Hungry Root. It's the easiest way to eat healthy.
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Let's talk about what makes someone instantly more attractive. Hobbies, passions, interests. Did you know that 80% of women find having a hobby sexy? Like having a passion for something. Imagine that!
And there's a scale of hot hobbies, by the way. Woodworking? Hot. Beekeeping? Hot. But if your whole personality is crypto, the judges are going to need to see a little bit more variation from you, okay? Show us something else before you show us your portfolio. But here's what's fascinating. Pottery and plant parents are having a moment. Something about someone who can nurture things and create with their hands. And
And don't forget, your bio is prime real estate. Instead of just listing hobbies, make them conversation starters. Looking for someone to try my experimental pasta hits a little different than I like cooking. And when you match, your hobbies are literally the perfect conversation starter. Trust me, talking about something you're passionate about is way more interesting than, hey.
Tinder is perfect for showing off who you are through your interests. It's not just about looks. It's about finding someone who vibes with your hobby. Explore all the possibilities for yourself. Tinder. It starts with a swipe. Download the app today. Okay, so if you missed it, I had gone ahead and released a sort of cover of Adore You by Harry Styles reimagined with the Broski special on it. Okay. This has been...
in the works, and by this I mean a much larger project, has been in the works for, I'm not joking, five years. It's been, damn, it's been five years from when this process started to finding the sound, honing the sound, and perfecting, not perfecting, but I guess
mastering the craft of not blowing your voice out when you sing, how to get into the mindset of writing and co-producing and being an active participant in this creative process.
Because of course, because it's my project, it's me. But it's such a creative collaboration every step of the way. And it's so much fucking fun. It's so much fun. Like I talk a lot of fucking bullshit on this podcast about everything. But like one thing that I hope rings true is my passion for the arts and my passion for music and how...
and every fiber of my being is informed by that passion for music. It's something I feel in my soul. It's something that's in the very bones of people that get it. You know what I mean? And from everything I've talked about of being raised in the church and all of my inspirations and the sonic universe that I exist in in my mind that I wanted to be
you know, breathe life into this project. It's happened and it's here and it's so exciting. Truly, it's so overwhelmingly exciting and also nerve wracking, right? Because you share something that intimate with an audience and you're subjecting yourself to criticism and commentary. And I'm not worried about that.
I have my fair share of opinions on music and I urge people to listen and develop their own opinions. That's what it's there for. But at the same time, it's there for me. You know what I mean? I talk about this all the time of art is for the artist as much as it is for an audience, for the voyeur as much as the creator. And this to me was the process of even creating this Harry Styles cover.
And of course it was a Harry Styles cover. It had to be a Harry Styles cover. Harry Styles and One Direction is quite genuinely one of the pillars of who I am, why I am the way I am, my friendships, the connections I've made, both professional and personal, and
Who I am on a personal, social level. Treat People With Kindness was my first ever tattoo. Like, there are so many reasons why this had to be a Harry Styles song. And not only that, but it was also to show as a proof of concept, look what is going on up here. You know what I mean? Like, the lyrics to Adore You are devastating if you think about it like that. Just like the lyrics to You Are My Sunshine are devastating if you think about it like that.
And I knew that I wanted to flip it and make it this, you know, whimsical, ethereal rock song. And we did it. And shout out Scott Hoying. Holy fuck.
Because he completely rearranged it with me and we just brought a new life to it. And it's so exciting because here's this song that was top of the charts. Everyone knows it. Everyone knows the words. And it's totally different. And it has a different meaning now, too. That is what it makes my penis rock hard.
So this whole process, plus the visuals, oh my fucking God, Paige, Sarah, my creative director, Elizabeth Youngling, my love, all of the people who worked on this project with me,
The best is yet to come. Truly the best is yet to come. And this was just the fucking smorgasbord, the aperitivo of what's to come. It had to be a cover. It had to be Harry. And I just knew that. And I'm so happy with the release. I'm so shocked by the outpouring of love that y'all have. I mean, I am blown away. I did not think it was going to be like that.
I thought I was gonna release it and people were gonna do that. "Another fucking TikToker making music." Yeah, you think I haven't gone through that fucking conversation with myself, you bitch! I fully understand the optics on this, okay? And I saw someone comment and I damn near cried. Someone commented under a video where someone said, "Not everyone needs to make music." Someone commented, "Why?" I didn't touch them!
You would not look at someone who's trying to paint or someone who's trying to learn how to fucking hopscotch and say, no, there's too many. We don't need you. That's not how art works. It's not how life works. Like truly anyone, anyone can buy a fucking microphone or use their iPhone microphone and make a song. Dochi is a living example of that. Dochi is such an inspiration. It's like...
That I knew that was going to be a part of the conversation because of who I am and my background and how I came up on the Internet. Completely fine. But when that's used as a weapon as to why someone shouldn't make art or someone shouldn't express themselves through art, what are you even talking about? It sounds stupid as fuck because it's not hurting you at all.
If it annoys you, okay, don't listen to it. Sorry. It's not for you. You know what I mean? Art isn't for everyone. But when it connects how and when it's supposed to connect to that person or that demographic, it's fucking magic. It's magic. So I just can't thank y'all enough. I mean, it truly, it's been...
It's been psychotic watching everyone's reaction videos and TikToks and edits. It's an art. It's just been better than I ever hoped because I tried to keep my expectations realistic and temper my reaction.
to a release because it's something, even though it's, I didn't write that song. It's very personal, you know, when it's being sung from a place of connection and, uh, yeah, I'm, I'm just, I'm over the moon with the fact that y'all like it. So if you like that one, that's just sort of appetizer. So I'd sort of hit lock in. I'd lock the fuck in and get ready. So
That's all I'm going to say on that right now. That's all I'm going to say right now. Okay. When was the last time you needed to go to a doctor, but you pushed it off? You made the excuse, I'm too busy. I can't find my insurance card. Getting health advice from the latest social media trend or influencer is enough.
I think we've all been there. Booking a doctor's appointment can feel so daunting. But thanks to ZocDoc, there's no reason to delay. They make it so easy to find and book a doctor who's right for you. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high-quality in-network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment.
We're talking about booking in-network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty, from mental health to dental health, primary care to urgent care, and more. You can filter for doctors who take your insurance, are located nearby, and are a good fit for any medical need you may have.
Also, with hundreds of verified patient reviews, you can find the type of care and support you're looking for, from good bedside manner to fast wait times to doctors with the best listening skills. Once you find the right doctor, you can see their actual appointment openings. Choose a time slot that works for you and click to instantly book a visit. Appointments made through ZocDoc also happen fast, typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking. You can even score same-day appointments.
Everyone knows I use ZocDoc to find my dermatologist, and Lord knows I keep him in business, so I'm glad I found him. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash broski to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash broski. ZocDoc.com slash broski. So, I've kind of been dancing around this subject, and I'm going to sort of lock in and get to it.
The Roman Empire. Have we talked about it enough? Yes! Who gives a fuck about the Roman Empire? Me! Me! So let's talk about it! Okay? Are you mad? Here is the thing. I thought I was... Okay, I have about 107 things I want to say and also I'm sweating. Sometimes I catch a glimpse of myself when I do my hair a certain way and I'm like, "God, you look like Queen Victoria."
Like that fuck-ass hairstyle they used to do where it was just like, I just look like, I just look so British it scares me sometimes. That's not me! But it is me. Fuck! Okay. The Roman Empire. What was I gonna say? Oh. It's been a long damn time since I've come on this podcast and talked about a man. Okay? It's been a long damn time. But I'm about to do it.
And it's not, it is not, and I say that and mean it, it is not out of a place of yearning, okay? It is out of a place of academic curiosity. There is a TikToker by the name of Frederick Atkinson. Is he British? You may be asking, yes, okay? Of fucking course he is. Frederick Atkinson. He does...
A lot of different content, but I would describe it as being, and shout out Frederick because he's definitely going to see this, pretentious, okay? And because guess who's watching it? Big forehead meat, okay? Big...
an empty, that I am just frothing at the mouth to fill with the classics, to fill with literature, to fill with Greek and Roman mythology. And guess who is at the metaphorical tap on TikTok of that wealth of information? Frederick motherfucking Atkinson. And I'm under, I'm under the spigot of the faucet, okay?
He does videos on, like I said, English literature, classics, even all the way back to like The Odyssey, Beowulf, any of these classic poems. John Milton, Paradise Lost. He's talked about Dante Alighieri, like all of these tomes that you would study in a classics class. And
I like his style of content because he does it in a way that's digestible. He puts pictures up on the screen so I can look at them. And he tells it like a story. He also does stuff sometimes where he'll go on the road.
And he went to, uh, who the fuck's grave? He went to Oscar Wilde's grave and showed it there and talked a little bit about his life and his end and his legacy. And I enjoy videos like that, okay? I find them highly entertaining. Look like Milo from Atlantis? Yeah, he does. Does that intrigue me? Yeah, it does. You motherfuckers. Y'all hate me.
Y'all hate me! And it shows! Damn! Can I talk? Can I speak? I have a career! No! And what the fuck is a Queen Victoria sponge cake? Y'all did not have to eat like that. The menu on the Titanic was fucked up. Can't believe y'all were eating like that. RIP Queen Victoria, you would've loved Tostino's pizza roll. You would've loved fucking Tyson Anitizers. Okay, anyway. Frederick Atkinson!
I enjoy his content, okay? On one video, I left a comment and then I immediately deleted it because I'm humiliated, okay? I left a comment like, I left a comment like, love your content, keep it up. What the fuck? Hey, go ahead and log out for me. Love your content, keep it up. I turn 28 in a month. Figure that shit out, dude. And I come out here and I'm like, man, no.
I hate men. I turn into fucking Godzilla on this podcast. And I'm, coo, coo, men. And I breathe fire and I burn everything down. And then I'm like, love your content. I'm such a fucking tool. I am such a tool. Chat, can girls be tools? Damn. Anyway, I've really, that's been my addiction lately. And he talks, so hold on. I was getting somewhere with this.
He talks about Greek and Roman mythology, okay? And he will tell the story of these gods or goddesses and how they came to be, what they're known for, who their lineage is. And of course, this has got me thinking, okay?
Song of Achilles has been sitting on my shelf for the past three years. And I read the first five pages and then I got sucked into another book. So it's been there. And I know Circe is another one that that same author wrote that they're both just people love those fucking books.
Well, it got me thinking because I was like, I just finished my Viking smut book, Fade of Ink and Faded in Ash. And I don't fucking know, bro. I don't know. I gave it three stars on Goodreads. It wasn't my favorite, but it definitely kept me entertained. And did they have sex? Yeah, they did. Okay. And was it in a hot spring? Yeah, it was. And would I have gotten a UTI? Yeah, I would have. Anyway.
That one I finished and I was like, I want something that, because I don't want to jump right back into Sherlock Holmes, okay? Sherlock Holmes, I got to take a break from every now and then. I love Sherlock Holmes and y'all know I'm powering through it, all of them. And I just finished, what's the one of the redhead? The redheaded Sherlock Holmes, redheaded, the redheaded league.
That one was crazy. Okay. Just finished that. And I don't want to read nonfiction. I don't want to read, you know, George Orwell's Why I Write. That's been on my nightstand for a long time. I started it and I just, I find myself yearning for fantasy because when I sit down to read Orwell, I love Orwell, but I want to take notes. And I'm not always in a place where I can annotate and like study the text the way that I want to.
And I'm also not always in the mindset to do it. You know, like I want to be locked the fuck in when I do that. Not like, oh, I got to read duties. I want to enjoy it. So it's been sitting on my nightstand for a long time. I digress. This episode is sponsored by SeatGeek. Get up! Ethel Kane announced an album and tour dates. Get up!
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I started Song of Achilles because of one Frederick Atkinson, who, by the way, is writing a book. Hey, Freddie, go ahead and send that shit to me. I'd love to read it. Song of Achilles. I'm about 60 pages in. It's incredible. It's incredible. I get it. I get it now. I'm not even a third of the way through the damn book, and I'm like, just the best book I've ever... I really am enjoying it. And it's gay. Okay.
I didn't know Greek and Roman mythology was so freaking gay. It's really, really a beautiful story. So that's Song of Achilles. And now I'm down this rabbit hole of that is the telling of Achilles from a obviously positive portrayal. Now there is a book that is a retelling of the story of Achilles from the opposite perspective called The Silence of the Girls.
And this says, throwback to 2021 when we all went from he is half of my soul, as the poets say, to we called him the butcher. Damn. So after I finish Song of Achilles, naturally I have to hurt myself and read The Silence of the Girls. Then I'm going to read Circe. And I also bought Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem, Clem,
Cleitimnestra. Cleitimnestra. Cleitimnestra. Greek mythology was the wife of Agamemnon, king of Mycenae, like the Mycenaeans, and the half-sister of Helen of Sparta. Okay. Right.
Uh, there is a book by this name. Yeah, this one, Clayton Nestra, a novel. I started this one. And by started, I mean, I'm on page six. Uh, and I started on the plane and I like her writing. It's very easy to follow. Very descriptive, very, um,
I love a book. I've told you all this, like books like The Secret History and any Dan Brown book. I'm like, yes, teach me new words. Teach me new words. I want to be reading a book and be like, right, and have the dictionary open, the dictionary app open on my phone. That to me is, there's nothing better. Okay, I got my peppermint tea. I got my reading ambience on my TV screen.
I'm in my bed, okay? Candle lit, lights off, reading lamp on. I'm locked the fuck in. There is no other place I want to be than boom, book that is both feeding my brain and my heart and my dictionary app open. That is paradise to me, okay? Anyway, Song of Achilles. I'm down this rabbit hole now of I'm gonna pick a god or a goddess, okay?
and fixate. It all kind of started back when I read The Secret History years ago because it's based on a group of classic students and it's based around Bacchus and the Bacchanal, where it's basically like a big pleasure orgy in many senses of the word and everything spirals out of control from there. And it's just very interesting because it's all in...
A lot, all of these authors, right? When you talk about someone like a Donna Tartt or a Pierce Brown or even, you know, Madeline, who wrote Song of Achilles? Madeline Miller. These people are clearly fanatics of the classics of Greek mythology and are well-researched. And Pierce Brown, I mean, he loves the Roman Empire almost to a degree that is, you know, you're a freaking nerd. You're a nerd. You're a nerd.
But it makes for great world building. And I really, really admire that where you are writing a fiction or, you know, in this case, a sort of retelling of a very popular story from the perspective of an academic.
So interesting. I love it. I think it's a great way to resell these stories to a new generation and to keep them alive. Because, damn, there's a reason they're still around. You know what I mean? There's a reason people just cannot get enough. The gods were T. The gods were T. That's probably why. They were fucking. Capital F. Fucking their brothers, their sisters, their mothers, their...
Everyone. They were drinking wine and fucking and afterwards they would have an olive. Yeah, I'm interested. You're gonna look at me and tell me you're not interested? That you wouldn't partake? Anyway. Yeah, that is, it's been my latest thing. Okay. And in that vein, because I was just in Rome for way longer than originally intended, I had some time to sort of marinate in it. Okay. I was, I was in it. I was all up in there.
My God. I mean, I could just talk for hours of all the stuff that I learned. We did this tour of the Colosseum and of, like I said, the Roman Forum, Circus Maximus, all of these places that are still standing. I'd been to the Pantheon before. I'd been to these places. But to see it now and marvel at it for different reasons. You know, you, I remember 10 years ago, I was 18.
My initial sort of "wow" was that it's still there, right? That's the initial reaction is "holy shit, this is from... the Colosseum was finished in 80 AD." 8-0 AD. And it's still around. That is something in and of itself to marvel at. The next thing is that they were able to build it. And not only able to build it, but with better materials than we use today.
You can see where they've done repairs on the Colosseum to either make it look, you know, more presentable, make it look whole, or just to repair damage that tourists have done. And even the building materials that they use and their repairs do not hold up. They don't hold up against weather the way that the Roman materials still do. That shit makes me just
And so if you've ever wondered why the Colosseum looks like that, it's because people recycled the marble. When they were building new buildings, no one gave a fuck about the Colosseum after the empire fell and they used the marble, they repurposed it. And so they would go up there and just destroy it. And they'd take down the marble pieces and there are holes all in it because inside of any of the arches or the columns or whatever,
the seating was iron that they would use and they would, it would be a sort of indent or a groove in the flat marble and they would pour hot iron into it and it would go down into a little hole and it would, it would bind it. And so when it cooled and solidified, everything was held together. It's amazing. It's amazing. Well, when, like I said, the empire fell,
People were not impressed with these buildings anymore, or rather, these buildings were negative reminders of what life under an empire was or under a certain ruler. Also, the reason it was called the Colosseum is because there was a giant statue of Nero right outside of it that they called Colosso, Colosseo. Okay? And then the building right next to it became referred to as the Colosseum.
Now that statue was taken down, I'm sure melted down and again repurposed. But why does the Coliseum look like that? That is not its original design. The way that it slants off to the side, the other half of it is missing. It used to be one giant building, similar to how the amphitheater in Verona looks. You put all that up here.
And it's incredible to think that entire structure used to be covered in the whitest, purest marble, polished, shown gold statues, bronze statues in each of the
The openings above the seats, there were clear and still are clear markings above each of the entryways that corresponded to your ticket, where you would sit, where your entrance was. And of course, it was stratified. The emperor had his box and then all of the nobles or well-to-do sat in sort of the 100 section. The 200 section was, you know, servant men. And then the higher up is slaves, women, and children. So...
It's just incredible that this shit still stands and what they were able to do. And it makes me, I did a lot of reflecting on the Roman Empire while I was in Rome because what else is there to do? And I came to this conclusion that's kind of like, you know, when I think of the Roman Empire, I think what a tragic waste of potential. That's what I think. I think it was a waste of
Of what could have been the closest thing we could have had to a utopia. But if you said when could the go, yes, but would. When you, when, when. Shut up!
I think about the Roman Empire as what could have been a beautiful society, but instead was the very definition of empire. It was a horrible tragedy and it was succumb or die. And when you, I mean, look at this image of what the Roman Empire covered at one point in time. Do you see this? All of the red is the Roman Empire. This goes all the way up
from the UK, from, from what is that? Wales, all the way down to the Nile, all the way down. I mean, it's incredible. It is incredible what they were able to do, but it's so devastating because for, to what end, right? To what end?
where you make the emperor a god, where all of these people are forced to succumb and become Roman citizens, and these Roman structures pop up, for what?
Like when you lose beauty and individual culture and customs and dress and religion and all of the things that make humanity human, when it all just becomes homogenized, what a loss. Even if you're providing them with benefits like aqueducts, bathhouses, entertainment.
All of these things, you know, you get all the benefits of the innovation of the Roman Empire, but they're built with slavery. And that's not, it's just, I could write a paper on it of like the epic tragedy of the Roman Empire. And I fail to see how it was ever going to succeed. Right? So much to think about.
Anyway, I think that that mixed with when you think about even then Romans, Roman mythology is stolen directly from Greek mythology and they just changed the names and warped the stories and made it fit. I mean, what's new about that? You know, taking a religion or or ideology and warping it to fit your political propaganda. OK, it's not new. We haven't not heard of that.
But it's just, it's like, to what end? That's my question. To what end? Anyway, to be able to go to where the Circus Maximus used to be, like the chariot racing and where the marble...
seating was. And in the Coliseum, you can actually see they have a little mock-up in one section where marble remains of what, you know, if you imagine that all the way around the amphitheater, what it used to look like. There is a huge spider in the corner of the room, and I'm trying really hard not to actually piss my pants right now. So, oh my god, it's huge. Okay, okay, okay.
I'm just gonna go ahead and wrap up the episode right now. I gotta let y'all know one last thing that I've really been addicted to lately. It's charcuterie nachos. Oh my God, I can't get enough of them motherfuckers. That motherfucking thing! Low-fat salt and vinegar chips. Pepperoni. Now, this is my dairy-free, low-fat, you know, bullshit, because I can't eat. I can only hear men. Salt and vinegar baked lays. Salami.
turkey breast, turkey, like, deli meat, banana peppers, olives, crushed up salted pistachios, and to finish it all off, dill, fresh dill, and a drizzle of hot honey. Go ahead and make that in your kitchen tonight and tell me that's not the most delicious bullshit you've ever had in your fucking life. I was blown away, okay?
It's my latest obsession. Now, I'm going to see y'all next week because I feel like I talked for about 35 minutes about my gallbladder and I feel real sorry about that, to be honest. Thank you for listening to the music. If you want some merch, go to broski.shop. Get you a muumuu, get you a t-shirt. Probably more to come soon, by the way. So keep your eyes peeled on that.
love and appreciate y'all more than you will ever know. Okay? You listen to me ramble about the Roman Empire. You listen to me ramble about Frederick Atkinson. And you listened to me ramble about Call of Duty masked men. Okay? And by the way, don't even get me fucking started on Pedro Pascal and this Last of Us campaign that he's doing. I don't want to talk about it. Don't ask me about it. I don't want to talk about it. It's too much. New Royal Court episodes coming out very soon. Keep your eyes peeled. There's some fun ones coming up.
I will see y'all next week. Goodbye. This has been sponsored by SockDoc. When was the last time you needed to go to a doctor but you pushed it off? You made the excuse, I'm too busy, I can't find my insurance card. Getting health advice from the latest social media trend or influencer is enough.
I think we've all been there. Booking a doctor's appointment can feel so daunting. But thanks to ZocDoc, there's no reason to delay. They make it so easy to find and book a doctor who's right for you. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high-quality in-network doctors and click to instantly book an appointment.
We're talking about booking in-network appointments with more than 100,000 doctors across every specialty, from mental health to dental health, primary care to urgent care, and more. You can filter for doctors who take your insurance, are located nearby, and are a good fit for any medical need you may have.
Also, with hundreds of verified patient reviews, you can find the type of care and support you're looking for, from good bedside manner to fast wait times to doctors with the best listening skills. Once you find the right doctor, you can see their actual appointment openings. Choose a time slot that works for you and click to instantly book a visit. Appointments made through ZocDoc also happen fast, typically within just 24 to 72 hours of booking. You can even score same-day appointments.
Everyone knows I use ZocDoc to find my dermatologist, and Lord knows I keep him in business, so I'm glad I found him. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to ZocDoc.com slash broski to find and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash broski. ZocDoc.com slash broski.