Hour 1: Be Like Mike
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This is the Dan Levitar Show with the Stugatz Podcast.

Join us in the cheap seats tonight. Dan and the Kid Mero are watching Game 3 of the NBA Finals presented by Remy Martin. Catch the live stream starting at 8 p.m. on the Levitard Show YouTube channel. Is there any chance that Greg Cody is here tonight to do three shows within 24 hours, one of them at 8 p.m. tonight, introducing the Kid Mero? The show is going to be extraordinarily Latin, the most Latin NBA coverage you will find. Maybe ever.

I mean, I'll be here. Tony, this demo, the Unicorn Hispanic demo, underserved. We're going to have Jorge Sedano and the Kid Mero and Boppy. It's going to be the most Hispanic English language broadcast of an NBA game there has ever been. Wow. Will Greg Cody be there? Just to balance it, you mean? You want the gringo there? What are you getting at?

I was inviting you to the party. You never know. Anything's possible. Isn't Sedano working the game? He is. Anything's possible. And with us. Nice. It's a big get. It's going to be very Hispanic. I'm excited for this game.

It's the NBA finals. I like it. Are you going to be here tonight? What does that mean? You can't get away with that. No, that's what he says when all of a sudden, hey, I bone up all the time if I have to get ready for the Pacers. I'm going to need the moment. After two years of the NBA is dead ratings talk. I've wanted the good real ratings so I can nail Nempard. Okay. Yeah, I'm going to be here.

I'm gonna be here talking ball. Who's gonna be here? Who are we doing this with? You will have. It will be Dan, the Kid Mero, Chris, Tony, Jeremy, Mike Ryan, and Juju. Mike Ryan Ruiz. Jeremy also counts his Latin. I do count. I don't often get that respect. Can you count in Spanish? No, he's Cuban. No, I'm saying, can you count in Spanish? Uno, dos, tres.

Trace. Jeremy is not a Hispanic name. Jeremy is. It really isn't. I was supposed to be Ephraim. Now that would have worked. That's my grandfather's name. I was supposed to be Shawn Michael. I would have loved that. Sweet chin music.

Greg Cody, I have for your display, you did not know that this was coming, but because you have not been involved enough in the show right now, I had especially curated for this moment a Greg Cody wheel of topics. Is there a name for this wheel, the wheel that we have commissioned to have made? Is there a name that you would have it have as the wheel of just your choice? It's totally about you, your narcissisms. Wow.

And it will be subject matter of your choice. But should it have a name? Would you like anything to name it? Wheel of Good Fortune?

Okay. Spitballing, no bad ideas, no bad ideas. We'll do it. Here are the topics on the Greg Cody Wheel of Good Fortune. He has an objection to the name Minicamp. He has the take that he is bored with someone's dominance. He has Aaron Rodgers takes, and he has that championship rings have become an embarrassment. Wow.

And he wants to also talk about how good of a soup he can make because he's the originator of soup of the day. Thank you. So let's spin the wheel, and Greg, you tell me what it is. Good work, executive producer. You've had an inconsistent day today. I mean, this button thing is just messing with me. Okay, very good. Good explanation. What did it land on there, Greg? Uh.

I have to read what it landed on? Don't we have a Vanna White here? No, what did it land on? What did it land on? I think it landed on... What did it land on? What do you mean? Do you think? Can you not see it? Take a look at the board. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was looking in the wrong direction over there. There's two wheels. It's confusing. Yeah, now I see it.

No, let me talk a second about Aaron Rodgers. What do you mean? It landed on Aaron Rodgers. Yeah, that's what I mean. Aaron Rodgers. That's why I say I'm going to talk for a second about Aaron Rodgers. But what did it land on? Aaron Rodgers. Smooth. I don't think it landed on Aaron Rodgers. I think it landed on ice. It's one of those spin again ones where it landed right on the ice.

What a waste of time that is. Have you ever been in a radio promotion? Why do you have a spin again thing? What? Yeah, I don't get that either. I just want to give you the shirt. You want a 790 shirt? Have it, buddy. Just give me the bumper sticker. Take a chick. So what did it land on? I don't have my glasses on. I can't see it. We're going to do a re-spin? It said spin again. What did it land on, Greg? What did it land on? It landed on Aaron Rodgers. Okay! Twice in a row, apparently. All right, take it away. Okay, this is so weird. And...

Aaron Rodgers can't not be weird, okay? He got married a couple of weeks ago, and he refuses to reveal the identity of his wife. I don't understand that. What is he hiding? Privacy? What? Privacy? Did they get married in private? He probably feels like a target right now. By who? Who's targeting him? Okay, whoever he thinks is targeting him. The radical left. What is he, David Sampson? Miles Garrett is targeting him.

Miles Garrett. Miles Garrett. Graveyard in Sochi. No, that's fair. You know what's amazing about what Miles Garrett did is that would indeed be death and murder, but not targeting. It probably would. The targeting part would be illegal. The putting him in the graveyard part, not really.

So I'm the only one who thinks Aaron Rodgers getting married and not refusing to reveal the name of his wife is weird? I'm not going to give him what he wants. Greg, come with me. Let's have some coffee. All right. If you follow the Pat McAfee show, about a month and a half ago, it was very clear that Aaron Rodgers was getting married. They tried to be coy with it. Not a strength of A.J. Hawks. Just straight up, subtlety, not a strength. So it was very clear that Aaron Rodgers had had

had something in his personal life happen and it was one of those things like let me be secretive so you talk about it more that was the perception anyways I'm not going to undercut Aaron Rodgers he feels plenty attacked I'm not going to do that happy as someone that read his book with his own ears that he has found someone to be a life partner with him that's great stuff but everything around it is like it's him joshing the media again in his Aaron Rodgers fashion okay

I mean, it's possible that he just doesn't, or she, or he, whomever he's with is not interested in that attention. And to the degree that he can turn that down on them, maybe he's just being...

A good partner. I'm not going to just criticize Aaron Rodgers for every last thing. If he found love through complicated family relationships that Ian O'Connor wrote about and Mike listened to, wrote about thoroughly reported, listened and listened to years that that book will tell you that he is trying to be introspective. He is trying alternative ways and he has a lot of broken relationships in his life.

and he has found himself now with somebody. And you can listen to Danica Patrick about what being in a relationship with him was.

And you can also want your privacy in this moment because I'm guessing that Aaron Rodgers, whether he is a victim or not, it feels under attack. And anyone he loves, he wouldn't want anywhere near everything that comes with that. So if there's not one picture of her, him, anybody out there, I understand why he would want his privacy there. Who would he want to subject to that? I love how liberal this show is. Like we're respecting Aaron Rodgers, her, him. I'm like, what are you? He's probably like, what?

It's what? I saw someone say that this statement that he gave was essentially going, "Yeah, I was matrimonized."

Happy for him, though. He seems like a complicated dude. He also doesn't seem like... That didn't feel sincere. Happy for him, though, kind of bored. Complicated dude. Well, as the only person that read the book with his ears, I mean, people don't talk enough about his charitable works. He does like that being talked about in the open. He does a lot of good work behind the scenes, as public and front-facing as he is. It'd be good for his brand for people to know what a good guy he is, philanthropically speaking.

Is it really that liberal we go her him? Like, wouldn't we have to include more variety? Yeah, the non-binary folks. I don't think that we're being super liberal. I think we're being respectful because a man chose to keep it private. So obviously we're leaving the door open to everything, every possibility. I think the liberal aspect here is refusing to say that it's weird that he refuses to

say who his wife is. No, I dig privacy. Go for it. Greg, do you feel entitled to being in his every business? I feel entitled as someone who is talking about a very, very public figure. But he is, not she. Okay, but she married into it, just like Jordan Hudson did when she dated...

Bill Belichick. Yeah, whatever. No, I'm happy for him. Good. Go for it. Other insincere happy for him. He really doesn't feel that these things are such indifference and I'm happy for him, but it really is tossing toilet paper at him. Do a whatever out there. Least emotion ever put into that phrase. Let me tell you, I don't think he's going to be bad as quarterback either.

Saying good things about the man. I don't think he's going to be a bad fit for the Steelers. I think he's exactly what they need. And we're happy for him. And the Steelers are exactly what he needs. And whatever. And I hope he found this in his partner. Whatever was my favorite. The general stubbornness in the complicated relationship this show has had with Aaron Rodgers over, yeah, we'll read books about you, dude. We're desperate to understand you. Oh, that's all there is.

Okay. Let us get out there. We're happy. But we're happy for you. Super. We're happy you found love. Love, love.

- Whatever. - No, and whatever. - The whatever. - We're happy you found love, whatever is not happiness, it's why we're not invited to the same movie. - No, you're misunderstanding the whatever. The whatever is, I know things are different from back in my day, but I wanna make it clear that I'm okay. It's like whatever, I don't care what you do. - You do you. - Yeah, you do you. - I am happy for him.

I think it's the funniest thing in the world that this is probably the most LGBTQ inclusive conversation we've ever had. And it's over the idea of a make believe conversation.

for Aaron Rodgers. That's offensive to Dan. I don't blame Jeremy at all. He's been smothered for two and a half hours. He did mention Alphabet Mafia once. Two and a half years. Well, okay, thank you. Good correction, Jeremy. Don Levitard. Quiet man. Yes. You know, I'm a married man. I don't cheat on my wife despite that gratuitous line back in my day. Stugatz. I wish you were here, my wife. I really miss her. What?

No, I don't. That's the thing about being married. You know, you're not allowed to say, I don't miss my wife. I've been gone two days. I haven't been gone long enough to miss my wife. I'm sorry. I call her. I'm on the phone with her for 30 seconds. You know, what am I? Hello. All right. All right. We'll see you.

All right. And then, you know, I'm going to see her in two days. How's jumping, Charlie? Good. This is the Dan Levitas show with the Stugats. The thing that is happening right now that I keep wanting to get back to, but I guess we might end up at the Cody wheel again, is what is happening in California, what is happening in Los Angeles. Never mind the optics of it. The optics of it are horrifying enough. The reality of what is happening there with...

peaceful protests and what feels like state militia being rubber bulleting about just basic American freedoms because we are now going for whiter nation. Look, Dominique, we talk about David Sampson talks about he's not a fearful person and then gives us a litany of fears. I don't think I betray a confidence when I say that Dominique is extending his trip in South Florida

a couple of days longer than he would like because what is happening in Washington right now feels like it's not a welcoming place for him this weekend. Yeah, it's going to be a lot of traffic. I ain't messing with it. Or whatever. Or whatever. I want to talk about what is happening in Los Angeles, but it gets a little bit uncomfortable around here when we politicize during happy sports times. Like I've made that change on behalf of the audience because the people who came with us sort of understand, okay, there's not a lot of leftists.

leaning stuff in this space anymore. Like we identify as one of the things in sports that is that at a time that it's more popular with young white adults to not be that as the country moves toward Trump. And as Miami becomes this weird place where a whole bunch of Hispanics who are really grateful for being in this country, some of them, many of them Cuban, I'm surrounded now, have

have helped bring this thing that feels like state militia to Los Angeles where there are peaceful protests and we can hide under the semantics argument of, well of course illegal people who are here committing crimes shouldn't be here but that doesn't mean you should make all brown people and black people that. Like of course everyone can agree, yes, illegal criminals in this country, yes.

Get them out of here. But wait a minute. Who gets to decide what's illegal and criminal when you're just going to violate the Supreme Court and democracy and the Constitution and everything else in the name of now you've got an armed militia that says every protest is dangerous, even the peaceful ones. And you can frame it that way because the people are brown. And there's a purposeful blurring of the lines and moving of the goalposts. So this began with violent criminals who...

are here as illegal immigrants and we are going to target specifically people with a violent criminal record. Then it became any criminal record at all. Now it's just become show up at Home Depot and grab as many people as you can and then we'll figure out after whether they're American citizens, whether they have documentation. This continues to move in a direction that is horrifyingly similar to what

All of the other fascist dictatorships that we've seen across the last hundred years, at least because it's following the exact same textbook, which is if people are even peacefully protesting against you, you send in your militia, your military to cause havoc, to cause fear, to incite violence, sending in people.

military personnel to a city is not there to deescalate. They're not trained to deescalate. They're trained for war zones. And that's what you're turning any of these...

any of these protests into when you add a national guard that's protecting ICE as they're grabbing anyone and everyone, including story after story of U.S. citizens being detained for hours on end, separated from their family. This is only going the direction that, by the way, they laid out for us right from the beginning. And we here and a lot of other people tried to warn about, but yet they

We watched a ton of people, even within our own community, Dan, that supported this, that advocated for this. And that's the part that is frustrating in that regard. But this is a use of the military against us.

Our own people. If this was happening, and I know that we do these theoreticals all the time, but if this was happening in any other country, we would be looking at that as one of the most horrifying things that could possibly happen. The rest of the world doesn't understand how America is good with this.

And America is often judged when things like this happen in other parts of the world and sometimes have even justified wars for it. I don't want to get into the politics of it. I know Dan said peaceful protests. And I know from conversations that I've had with people that are Trumpers that

They're going to say what's peaceful about lighting a car on fire and they're just going to be reinforced by their algo. So let's what I sit back and marvel at is how this is not even what he really campaigned on and the ability to just keep moving with the goalposts as they move. Trump himself said in 2020, you don't do this kind of move. You have to be requested by the governor.

And by all accounts, this was drafted before there was even a protest because of the way that it was framed. So I'm just trying to follow. Are we for states' rights or are we against it? Because when it comes to education, when it comes to gun laws, when it comes to a woman's right to choose and what happens with her body, we lean on states' rights a lot.

In fact, are you a second amendment person or not? Because the second amendment is about making sure that civilian militias can be armed in the event that the government weaponizes its military forces against its own people. Yet you're siding with the government here? There is a huge abuse of unchecked power that is going on right now and you can counteract it by just holding up what Donald Trump said

in 2020. So I'm really confused and I'm also disheartened by we already know how far they're going to push this. We're the Law and Order Party, yet we'll pardon everybody that rioted on January 6th and actually hurt people. There was a cop that died

on January 7th, who was hit with a chemical agent and his death was ruled in the line of duty. Well, pardon anybody that is associated with that because it placated to your vision, what you deem was right. It helped your agenda. It's not about violence. It's not about peaceful protests. In fact, yesterday, Donald Trump was in the Oval Office and maybe people want to rationalize what he said. He didn't say rioters. With the expectation of protesters coming to his military parade, his cosplaying fascist parade birthday party,

and the 250th anniversary of the armed forces. Traffic. He said that protesters will be met with strong opposition. That's not rioters. These are people exercising their constitutional right. And I'm so confused as a party that had a Tea Party movement that was holding up the Constitution is actively supporting something that subverts that very Constitution.

I think that it's really hard when you're always on your back foot trying to argue against and pointing out hypocrisy. So rarely do you win an argument by explaining to somebody why they're wrong, which like I think it feels like the right thing to do. And we all have hypocrisies. But I do think that competing vision is the only way that you can kind of pull whatever

that we have going forward. And I also think that it's a reminder, and this is a loose sports tie, but I spend most of my professional life, the most meaningful things I think I've done professionally has been with sports unions. And I know this doesn't feel like a direct tie, but it reminds me that when you are at a union, you have to fight to force the league to follow the rules that are there, even when it –

it appears that you're defending someone who has likely done something wrong because the rules and due process are there for a reason. And I think that's what we find oftentimes in these political situations or these, yeah, these more important social and political situations is that if it's not happening to you, you can, many of us find a trap door where we're like, okay, violating their due process is fine because to Jeremy's point, like it's,

it started with people who they said were violent criminals. Even violent criminals, you must force the government to abide by due process because once you open that trap door, you can't then close it. And that's the most frustrating part is, or scary part, I guess, is

And we're all guilty of it, where you find yourself in like, all right, if someone came into your house and took away a family member of yours, you'd be in the street. They are doing it. I'm not absolving myself. It is happening. We ain't in the street. OK, I would just say to you just more personally, if it sounds like sermonizing to you, the way things are going growing up in a childhood that is exiles,

fleeing a place where they had money to get to freedom in their teens without family assurances that they would be here and they respect and love this country and are grateful for this country.

I don't know the way things are going. They were not born in this country. If there is a scenario that can arrive that has my father and mother not allowed to be here anymore, and I can't rule it out presently given that I'm early in this administration, and what was promised to me in Project 2025 is this is exactly how you handle peaceful protests, and this is exactly how it is that you circumvent what feels like American democracy.

to make sure that the others never unite like a union. You can always make them the others and you'll always have the white people on your side as you will do allow South African South African people into this country. That might have changed with some tweets. Right. But it's trying to make this country whiter in a way that's overt, that

that is political, that is hateful, and allows you to keep the right to make all people other than you criminals based on whatever you make the laws that criminalize them, including just being brown, not having a license, or being a criminal because you're just like all those other dirty Mexican rapists that we had to build a wall

to keep out. I would feel duped if I voted for him because he distanced himself from Project 25. He said, I don't know these people. No. Oh, come on. Donald Trump lied? He said, I don't know these people. So there's a lot of key parts in the platform he's enacted after he took office that is not stuff that candidate Trump campaigned on. We weren't talking about Canada. We weren't even talking about the Gulf of America. You touched on tariffs. We didn't know to the extent that we'd be starting a trade war. You talked about

the department education loosely, but everything that was detailed in Project 25, you expressly told me, that is not me. I have nothing to do with that. And then you almost follow it to a T. This is why I respect Mike Ryan's Marchand take. Because this is, sports is a great place for these conversations because nowhere else will you...

attach so much of your identity to something that no matter what happens, you believe that that thing is right? How many times have you seen a bad call in the game and you're like, well, it's a good call and you fight to the death. It feels very similar where so many people have attached so much of their identity to a particular person and party and movement that it's

it feels as though there's nothing that that team could do that could make you feel like, ah, maybe I'm not a fan anymore. But Mike, we all should be more like Mike Ryan because Marshawn. That's not a good idea. No matter what Marshawn does. Marshawn. No matter what Brett Marshawn. No.

I think if you take a lesson, it's not the Marshan thing because I'm very clearly being pigheaded there and I'm holding, sticking to my guns that I just don't like him as a person. No, no, I'm saying that he joined your team. I'm saying that he joined your team. He joined my team. And some people would, once they joined the team, like, oh, then he's good. You're like, no, I have integrity.

This is a bad guy no matter what team he's on. I think it's a dangerous time because, look, if something really bad happens at one of these protests, you're going to have an algorithm on the other side that's going to justify an irrational killing, potentially. And that's what I'm scared of because it's different now. It's much easier to refuse to admit that you're wrong. It's much easier to never capitulate because you can find something on the internet and daily get that reinforced with your algorithm that says, no, no, no, you're actually right about this.

He's got a great campaign slogan for you here. Be like Mike. Can admit he's wrong. Can admit he's right. Likes to be really right. Can admit he's right. This is my favorite Wild Billy Wednesday. This is not an echo chamber.

I also don't like viewing things through the prism of Republican and Democrat because, yeah, I'll support liberal causes because they seem to represent the opposition. But for me, it's something as clear as this is an unprecedented power grab from the highest office. If you claim to be a constitutionalist, like you told me for eight years. It's just starting.

Then why aren't you upholding the Constitution? This is a threat on that very Constitution that you held up. You're a Tea Partier. What is this? We have a king now? And I just view it as right and wrong. I don't view it as right or left. Well, and for what it's worth, like, Democrats had their opportunity when in power to start defunding ICE. And if anything, they only expanded the amount of resources going toward ICE.

This type of behavior, but it wasn't until the second administration with Donald Trump and more importantly, Stephen Miller behind all of this, Stephen Miller, who his ultimate and for lack of a better term, his final solution is deporting four percent of this country.

and completely destroying the economy, completely destroying the fabric of this country because that's what they want. What fascists want is everyone to suffer outside of them as they accrue power. And for those who look at this so black and white as well, they're illegal immigrants, they're criminals. You know what the criminality of being an undocumented immigrant is? It's akin to a parking ticket.

It's not an actual criminal offense in the way that everyone is making it like it's murder. It's no different if you can't look at this imagery. Everything that you're seeing right now is people are being round up in the streets. If you're just someone who doesn't understand because these are people who are different than you and maybe this wouldn't happen to you in your life. This is no different than if you and all of the people that you worked with

there were several people with outstanding parking tickets. And so ICE came into your office and just rounded as many people up as they thought looked like they might have outstanding parking tickets and then arrested all the ones who did and eventually released the others. That's the level of criminality that we're talking about. - Not, not, not an echo chamber. - And there's also a common misnomer and very effectively in the Dems to their failure have leaned in on this. Dems are not pro illegal immigrants.

They don't want illegals in this country. That is a majority opinion. And much like the trans issues in sports, conservatives are very effective in campaigning and framing them as such. And there's no good rebuttal. But in a lot of these cases,

TPS, that's not something that is very well understood. There's plenty of Venezuelans and Cubans that went through a full legal process to be in this country legally. And with one executive order, overnight they became illegals and now are being rounded up.

And all you're getting fed from your Fox News and your Algos is they're here illegally and you're going to get buy-in. Yeah. Get those illegals out here. You guys would agree with me that I've had no reason to fear more than right now in the entirety of my lifetime that there is the even remote possibility that my parents will have to die on the island they fled.

I mean, they're citizens. But it's not an, it's not, yeah, but for now. Citizens are being arrested? Oh, I can understand. I can understand the fear. For now. It's likelier than ever. Yeah. I mean, Donald Trump has said that deporting citizens to other countries is something that, yeah, we're going to look at that. So I understand. I'm just saying we're just starting with this. It's just the beginning. Chris Cody, do you have any thoughts on this? Yeah! Woo!

It's a good time for the Marchands of the world. I'd like to check his papers. They've got a state militia. I heard that as a woman faking pain. I didn't think that sounded real. I really didn't, you know. It was not fake. It was in no way fake. You can spot a woman faking it? Yes, I can, Jess. Expert. I've been married 40 years. This is the Don Levitard Show with the Stugats.

And those don't tread on me people just became, oh, please tread on me, daddy. Well, you say that, but Mike Ryan today, for some reason, burst into the room saying, threatening of all places, F1. Yeah, F1. Tread lightly. Hey, F1, F you. Did you see what they're doing? You see what they're doing? The greatest motor sports day ever.

is when you got Monaco in the morning, the Indy 500 in the afternoon, and the Coca-Cola 600 in the evening with NASCAR. You get all three major motorsports all in one day. You see what these guys are doing over at Formula One? Formula One is trying to switch the calendar so you get the Canadian Grand Prix the same weekend as the Indy 500. They're coming to North America and trying to take our crowd. This is dangerous. Let me tell you something, Formula One. Formula One.

Formula One, you are a Netflix documentary away, a cancellation away from being a funny car. I've seen the numbers in this country. You ain't Formula One in this country. You're not even Formula Two, Jack. And I've seen the Xfinity Series ratings on the CW. You're not even third oftentimes. Your ratings in this country? I saw the Miami Grand Prix. You got outrated by the cousin f***er

400 on FS1. Alright? Do not come to this continent and try to take the Indy 500 away from us. There were 350,000 people at that motor speedway. There were 7 million people watching at home, Jack. You can't even crack a million. You're not coming

across the pond and taking our motorsports weekend it's gonna blow up in your face thank you mike thank you john forrest has more charisma in his teeth yes then your drivers having their entire little bodies yes he is so right about this and bill byrd does a great routine where he says that white people when they can go around the world then say to anyone what did we invent what's ours

Stock cars. Not your big fancy things. Not your things with the big engines that cost millions and millions of dollars. Gritty old cars that built this country's economy that made my parents want to flee communism for the freedom of this country's stock car invention. Yeah, highfalutin, looking down on your nose at motorsports here in this country because a Netflix documentary made you feel like you were better than me. Ferrari. You don't even watch it. The races are bad. Formula One is bad.

bad. Flatly bad. And while you may watch the Netflix show in droves, you ain't watching the races. So you ain't coming over here screwing up my calendar, coming to my continent, and trying to put a dent in the Indy 500. They got one race a year that we talk about them. One race a year. And you ain't taking any of it, Shine.

Hallelujah, Mike. I'm glad you got all of it out from the last couple of days. It's like getting the air out of a tire that's overinflated. He's been mad for three days because of Marchand. He hasn't had a microphone. He hasn't gotten to talk enough about 6-1. You haven't gotten to say anything about winning 6-1. That was a couple days ago. We're on to game four. All right, so spin the wheel of Cody's. The wheel of fortune of Cody's. Spin it.

Wheel maximum, maybe? Wheel maximum. You probably shouldn't have called it the Cousin F***er 400. You shouldn't have done that. I don't know why. I appreciate you saying it again. I don't know why you did that. It seemed like you got carried away. I'm shocked that it's a sponsor. Don't be like Mike. Don't be like Mike there. He gets too emotional. It clearly landed there on minicamps. Did it?

Oh, yeah. It says minicamp. My bad. Again, I was looking someplace else. The phrase minicamp is so stupid. It's ridiculous. There's never been, like, I don't like Minnie Mouse. I don't like the Minnie Cooper. Wow. I don't like minicamp. Anything that begins with the word Minnie should be outlawed. Oh, okay.

And I can't think of a single exception. Minivan? Don't like the minivan. Minimanoso? You had a nice minivan, white minivan. I remember when I was like seven or eight. Dodge Caravan. That was a van, not a minivan. That was a van. Minimanoso? It felt like a minivan. Well, minimanoso spells it with two N's and an E on the end. I'm talking about mini as in tiny. So you're saying there are no good minis. Anything that's mini should be outlawed. Who doesn't like Minnie Mouse? Minnie Mouse isn't a real name. Her name is Mervina.

That's true, but Minnie Mouse spells it with an I-E as well. Oh wait, it's Google AI. That can't be true. Minosa and Mouse both spell their first names Minnie. M-I-N-N-I-E. Minerva Mouse? That's a great Deftones song. That wouldn't work at all. Minerva? That's why they shortened it. They would have gotten divorced. Well, they got divorced and it really impacted their stock price. I heard the bad joke. I don't care if no one else heard it. What happened?

Let him have it. Let him have it, Chris. Let him have it. What? What did I say? Greg, this is what's happening. What did you say? You said it. What did I say? You're like, the Minerva of her? Yeah, right. Minerva. The Nerva of her. Right. It's good. Good line.

Minerva? Nerve? The Nerva-her. Minerva-her. It works. It works on several different levels. Dominique knows. It's getting better, though. The more you do it, the more I like it. It started out not great. Yeah, Minerva. The Minerva-her. It does have a sing-song cadence to it. Minerva-na. Minerva-na. The Minerva-her. Mickey Mouse's name. Not Mickey's nickname. What? We're doing a thing. You want to keep going? Keep going.

Minerva now. Minerva now. Minerva now. You guys got more? Keep going. This sounds great. Keep going. We only got three minutes. He stepped on a thing. Tone, we just wanted you to get in. Michael Theodore. Michael Theodore. Tone. Tone. I can't tell if he's shortening your name or warning you. I'm sorry to do this to you. I'm sorry to do this. Michael Theodore. Minor penalty. Two minutes. Great contribution. Stumbling.

See you later. I mean, you're about to get mad at me and Mike because Mike seized on, I had the Minerva song in my head and Mike was going to be the only one to help me there. And what I wanted from you there, tone is for you to jump rope between me and Mike doing Minerva. I tried. Well, well,

And then Mike said he's doing a thing, which I stopped and I said, okay, you guys double dutch. Keep going. Keep going. Longer. Go. More, more, more. You got six bars of Minerva. Keep going. Make it 12. Just let me double dutch. You want you to do it? Don't tell me to double dutch. Marvy Povich must be so confused right now. Double dutch. I'm going to take my two. Marvy Povich. The Minerva got me. Marvy Povich. I'm Minerva.

Marvy Povich. You're the first star of the game. So, look, Marvy Povich has liked what we do, what sports writers do, what Tony Kornheiser does. I don't know why this person, who has been at the height of comedy,

And at the height of news, I don't know why this person would fancy us sports writers people that he's fans of, but he will appreciate that I've got an executive producer that just botched that that way. So you want to say hello to Marnie Povich here? Hey, Marvie. Oh, boy. That's what Letterman used to call me. Marvie, Morty, Murray, anything but Maury because he was in love with my wife.

That's all Chris was doing, a Letterman reference. A callback.