Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
We're starting with a Christmas carol, right? Yes! Welcome back to the podcast! We wish you a Merry Christmas! We wish you a Merry Christmas! We wish you a Merry Christmas! And a Happy New Year!
bro just follows the crowd literally like he literally was hating on the christmas carol so are you actually what i'm not oh santa's here santa oh my god santa claus santa claus santa claus is coming wait santa's still on my lap you gotta come sit down santa we want to talk with you oh yeah we got gifts yo yo oh i got us talking
Did y'all get this from Target? This podcast is getting better and better. I'm going to put this in my room. Here's Kate. What type of candy is this? Why does Kate get the big one? Why is my stocking so big compared to everyone else's? A big girl needs a big stocking. Oh my gosh. Santa! You're on the naughty list.
santa's going on the naughty list for sure oh look how cute it is we have we have mrs claus i don't like being mrs claus and we have santa claus that's so so i guess should we open our can we open i i don't i actually don't know what's inside do we do we do one at a time yeah one at a time one at a time this would be nice because like
You know, I never get anything for this spot. I don't even get paid. So, I just actually get something for being here. You know on Christmas when you're trying to open your present and nobody's looking at you? What is this? Santa. Just open it. And then you start getting mad. Santa's. Rocking around. Oh. The flip? It looks like you. It's a ballerina. It's a dancer. It's a dancer for you. Oh, you got a... Santa got you a dancer. It's like all you talk about. I was at Target. I was at Target the other day and saw these. All right, my turn. Hey, yo. It's all you talk about.
- Thanks, Santa. I've got a ballerina. - One minute. - Oh! - Santa, I'm so sorry. - Yo, you're not going on the naughty list. - Hey, hey. - You're not getting anything. - Santa, do better. That's all I can say. - All right, let's see what I got. Okay, I'm nervous, but it's all that matters. Wait. - What did you get?
- Oh my gosh, that's just what I wanted! - What is it? - It's an elf. - Oh. - Aww. - Why is-- - I think he's trying to tell you that he misses you and he needs you back at the North Pole this year. - What does it mean? - I'm trying to tell you that you're short. - Y'all kinda look-- Wait, what'd you say, Santa? - I'm just trying to tell you that you're short. - Oh man. - Why is everybody throwing Santa's gifts? - Santa! - I'm pretty sure you snapped the neck on that when you threw it. - You're folding this year. - I don't know anything. - All right, Cash. - Santa, I-- - Santa, why are you--
I don't like it. I want something else. I'd rather have olives. Can you guys hear Santa in the mic? Say something, Santa. Hello? Oh, nice. So here's my song. He doesn't deserve to be heard. Let's see what Santa got Mrs. Claus.
Also, I really don't like being in a dress on a dude's lap. I don't really like this either. You don't like it either? You know you like it. I think y'all look great over there. I hate it. It's so romantic. I really can't stand it. Are y'all going to share a kiss during the pod? What'd you say?
Did you just tell me we will not be kissing? Y'all need a mistletoe? No, no. I'll get you a mistletoe. No mistletoe. Where's the mistletoe? Okay, let's see. There's definitely one around here somewhere. Oh, mine's in a brown sack too. Huh. Just like everybody's. You're not special. Harper, you wouldn't know. You designed it all. What? What? Oh. Wait. I don't get it. A hairy monster. Bigfoot? You know, he's kind of smelly. He kind of looks like a turd. You know? Like a turd.
What the? Say that to your own wife. That's crazy. Say that to your own age. Hey, yo. Say that he's a divorce. Bro. That's messed up.
Santa has a point though, you're kinda hairy. You're not like they made you out to be, that's for sure. You're not holly and jolly. No, you guys aren't what they made you out to be either. Alright Kate, open your big stocking. I'm scared. Ooh, I wonder where you got a big stocking for a small girl. Yeah, that's what they said. Santa, would my ornament just not fit in a smaller stocking? Uh, yeah. Oh. Actually?
And they all represent- Kate's ornament was too big to fit in a normal size. This gift is kind of self-explanatory if you want to go ahead and open that. Is it like a pig? It's self-explanatory? No way. Alright, Kate's gift is self-explanatory. Let's see. Wait, what is it? No! What is it? Show us! Show us! No way it couldn't fit in a small stocking. Oink, oink! Oink, oink!
I like that one, Santa. Santa, you are on point this year. Give me a little stocking. I'm going to make this fit. Come on. It just didn't. It just didn't. Yeah, it doesn't fit in a notice. Guys, I could have had a small stocking. I don't think so. So wait, were all our ornaments supposed to represent us? Yeah. Oh. Oh. Why? I don't understand mine still. Why did Kate get a pig?
I don't understand mine because I'm on growth hormones. It's a big ornament for a big girl. Oh. Yes, what Santa said. I know. What small girl? Santa, go back to the North Pole. Wait, you're Santa? No, he's actually Santa from the South Pole. No, he's my husband. Oh. Yeah, but we're getting a divorce. Santa looks different at my house. Whoa.
Wait, I don't get it. Wait, I wonder if this fits on my foot. Like a real stocking. Yeah, I don't. I don't get anything. You got a crappy stocking. What do you say? Makes sense that she doesn't get it. I'm only 14. Do you have any like crazy Christmas stories? Yes.
I do, actually. No, Harvard just speaks. She likes to say yes. What's your crazy Christmas story? Well, it's just one year. I didn't have money for Christmas presents, so I found a way to get everyone Christmas presents. Let's just say that. What? Did you steal? What? Oh, yeah. Kate's stealing again. No, not again. It was in my shoplifting era. I did...
Listen, when people need Christmas presents, I got Christmas presents, but I don't condone shoplifting. Don't steal. That's wild. Don't be the Grinch. I was the Grinch. I stole from like Target. Imagine receiving a stolen item as your gift. Oh, I would know how it feels. I got one last year. Someone shoplifted my Christmas present. Well, there goes my story. I can't be very specific now. Yeah, somebody did shoplift Kate's gift left. How?
Maverick? Tell them, Mav. Tell them who shoplifted your gift. No, no, no. You don't gotta be super specific. Wait, guys, this is not okay. I thought everybody here was a good kid. Now you know why all your gifts were so bad. Santa ran out of money this year. No, if I, if even vague, yeah, everyone will know who I'm talking about now. No, they won't. No? Yeah. Yeah, they will. Very vague.
Make it vague, vague. Nope, it's pretty obvious now. Vague to the max. Okay. I can't. There's no way. Guys, what's your name? I say like... Kate. Name it Kate. That's so cute. Just say that. But she said last year.
Well, nobody would have caught on, but now they caught on. Yes, they would have caught on. Okay, I'll tell you guys who it was. It was... A Maverick Baker. I guess I can't say who shoplifted Kate's gift. But last year, Kate received a gift, and it was stolen, and we didn't know until after. Will y'all tell me after the podcast? Yeah, sure. That's actually happened to me before. Actually, I'm just going to say it, and they can bleep it. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, that's fine. Whole family. Whole family. Yeah, I know. Got the whole family shoplifted gifts.
Make sure that cuts to Joe's face when I said that. No she does! Dude! No the crazy part is the person who shoplifted it actually has like a lot of money. And like a lot of money. That's what I was thinking! Wait, wait! So *beep* like *beep* one? We can't answer anything because we gotta bleep that out. Yeah I gotta bleep that out. Oh there's so much bleeping going on. Yeah it was. It was? Yeah. Hey bleep this too! Bleep this one too.
I don't think he bleeped any of that. Mine was definitely bleeped. That one was bleeped too. I bet the audience is so curious on what's getting bleeped. Oh yeah, for sure. Anyways. But yeah, when I found that out, I was like, there's no way. I know. It's crazy. So sad. I can actually successfully say I've never shoplifted once in my life on anything. Me too. I've never shoplifted. Except for the free spoolies from Sephora. Sephora? You said free. It's not shoplifting. Yeah.
No, but they put them out so you can like test the makeup, but people go in and take like handfuls. And I, that's what I did. Like less than a cent. So I'm pretty sure it's okay. Well, then it's just inconvenient because they always have to restock them because people are always taking handfuls. This be true. Yeah. Wait, guys, I have an idea. We should do a Christmas story with one word from each person around the circle. Okay, Matt, go. Say once upon. Once. Upon. Elephant. A time. A time.
That's a one. Oh, okay. I get it now. Okay, restart. Restart. Was. No, no. No, no. Original one. The. No. No. Once. Redo it. Sorry. Upon. A time. No. That's two words. A time is one word. A and time. Time. Oh my gosh. A counts as a word. We can't. I'm done. This game's done. No, no, no. A counts as a word. Okay, moving on. Once upon a time. There. Was. Someone. Who. Was.
was big and jolly she was was named oh yeah that's what we were thinking oh yeah she is two words i think yeah that was two words only one come on she was named miss baker
Piggy. Okay, I'm out. She's not that jolly, apparently. She's not that jolly. She may be. Moving on. I'd like to formally apologize. You should. Me? Yeah. First of all, you two are the one that made that joke. No. Yeah. Me? Y'all literally just made the joke, not me. No. Oh, the toe. Get them away. See, that's why we make jokes, Kate. There's hair. There's hair on it. You're picking up a pig with your foot.
With hair on it. It was lint from my sock, guys. That is disgusting. Last Christmas I gave you but the very next day you gave it away this year to save me from tears. No, no. I don't want to know what happened this week. Mav said he has a funny story and I told him to save it for the next podcast.
All right. Because it doesn't sound like a very Christmassy story, is it? It's not a Christmassy story, but... Oh, I have a Christmas story. Then save it. Watch all our episodes to figure out the story he's going to say next. Yeah! Or you can go join our fan club. We might say it on there as well. If you guys want to join our fan club, it's called... What's it called?
can call it the lol club okay we call it the lol club the patreon we call it the lol club but now we have a youtube channel also called the lol club so it's kind of confusing but go join our patreon it's our fan club and we have group chats in there we post a lot of behind the scenes content all that stuff so go join our patreon and yeah you'll have fun enjoy it so i have a christmas story one time i got taken by a christmas ghost
No, you didn't. So, we have a Christmas story. One time, Maverick... I knew you were going to say this. Which one am I saying? I'll let you finish it. He does not know which one I'm going to say. Oh, I know exactly which one you're going to say. I know which one you're going to say. Yo, that was a little rude. What does it have to do with? I'm not going to ruin it. Oh. So, we were opening gifts. Yeah, that's what I thought. And...
You're just gonna say that about anything I say now. No I'm not. Yes he is. We were opening gifts. We all opened up all our gifts and my mom was like, "So, how'd you guys like your Christmas?" And I was like, "It was great." My sister was like, "It was great. Thanks mom and dad." And Mal looks my mom dead in the eye just like this and goes, "Could have been better." Can you believe that? And your poor mother is just trying to- I was a child.
no he was like 12 yo you know i'm the product of her raising that's all i can say what i'm the product of her raising so that's on her at that point right and he made my mom cry on christmas oh she cried and the thing was is she had us make christmas lists and she got like everything on my list but i still that's what she was confused about she was like i literally got his whole list
And I was like, no. Yeah. It just wasn't what I thought it would be though. He just wasn't as excited as he thought he would be. That was at the time my grandma got him pants. She got him khakis. She bought him khakis and he goes, he opens up the box and he goes,
Well, not going to wear those and throw some on his head. I did. No way. I was not a good child. But to be fair, who gets a cake? Khakis. Yeah, I was like eight years old. Grandma, he needed those khakis. I don't think I ever wore those khakis one time. I was telling the truth. Well, you know what? Your mom probably donated them and there was somebody out there who wore the khakis. Have you ever had a bad Christmas gift, Harper? Yes.
I'm always so scared. This is going to sound really bratty, but I'm always so scared on Christmas that I'm not going to get what I want. Oh, my gosh. She was right. It sounded bratty. And, like, listen, like, I love all the gifts that I get, but when I open the gift and I have, like, an elf, I just get kind of sad. So you're not grateful for what Santa got you? No, I'm grateful. I...
I can give it to somebody else. What's the worst gift you ever had, Kate? I did. For the good. Worst gift I ever got. Yes. That's the question. I don't know. Everything I get is amazing. Oh, really? Wait, seriously? That was great. I'm really trying to think. Honestly, the worst thing I got was probably... Yeah, I got it. I don't know.
I don't know. I can't think. Okay. Well, that was cool. Don't break it. Barbara, you never answered. So what was the worst thing you ever got? Huh. Oh, not magical powers. When I was three years old, I went downstairs and I got so mad.
Because my mom, on my Christmas list, I said, I want to have magical powers. And she gave me a claw machine. Same thing, honestly. And a magic gift. That didn't work. Yeah. And then when I went downstairs, I went and nothing came out of my hands. Oh, that's so sad. Yeah, I got really sad. And I did so many little potions like the night before Christmas. And...
Nothing works like I said like put some snow under your pillow sleep with it. No one your pillow Yes, and there wasn't snow so I made my own You definitely had a cold side of the pillow you made your own snow. Yeah, how'd you make your own snow? Hey, I got a game speaking of wait, hold on hold the game speaking of snow. I asked mom. I know you're watching this I asked my mom
every single year for about 10 years in a row to buy a snow cone machine for christmas i have one i can give it to you that's great harvard i'm really i'm really really happy that you have a snow cone yeah i i have a lot yeah that's it's great i never got one oh um and i still never got one and i i asked her all the way up until i was 18 years old 18 is crazy you know how much the one that i wanted costed
1999. Oh. It was the one they sell at Walmart. The Hawaiian one. That's crazy. You never got it? Never got it. Ever. But you know by the time you were 18 you had money yourself. But it was a fax that like I wanted that and a BB gun. Blah blah blah.
And they got Mav a BB gun, but they never got me one. That's actually tragic. So we know who the favorite is. It was actually a real gun that they got me. Yeah, actually they got him a real one. Blaster, we're going to get demonetized.
demonetized. Oh, blaster. They got him a real blaster. And then I wanted one. And they got him his when he was like 11 years old. A real blaster at 11 years old. Okay, obviously he was locked away. Yeah, but you know how much... No, I kept that thing next to my bed. It was so strapped. Those are the two things. I always asked for a blaster until I was about 18 too and I never got it. I was 17 years old asking for it and they got him at 11. We didn't actually say that. No one trusted you with a blaster.
They couldn't trust you with a steak knife at the dinner table. That's awesome. My mom, I had to sit next to my mom at all the dinner tables because they wouldn't give me a knife. So she'd have to cut my steak and stuff. Until he was about 18 as well. And start stabbing things. And now I cut his steak. But you know what's ironic? Malbert chased me around with a knife. So if anyone shouldn't have a knife, it should be him.
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Listen, every sibling's been chased with a knife. No, yeah, I used to chase my sister with it. Yeah, he cornered me. I was cornered, and he has a knife. I'm at a knife point. Are you okay? I was terrified. I'm sure you were. I thought you had a knife point in a corner. There's nothing you can do. It's just like, ah!
Okay, are y'all ready for my game? You held me at blaster point before. Blaster point? I never held you at blaster point. Not with a real blaster, but with an airsoft blaster. That was overpowered. No, I didn't hold you at point. I used the point. Yeah, that was wild. What's your game? So, I have a bag. Yo, why does this have a J on it? Is it for Joe? No.
What? What's it wrong? It's not, no, it's not for Joe. Matt, hey Matt, why is there a J on that Christmas stocking? Why is there a J on that bag? That's so weird. He's crushing everybody. What? I have nipples on this bag.
Why would you ask about the J? Why would you have to be like that, Harper? I needed a stocking, and I just found this one in storage, so I thought it would be perfect. You know, I think I might have saw you. Why was it in storage? Matt, what's that stocking do here, Matt? Do you know? Yeah, why didn't we hang that one up this year? Oh, I asked you, and you specifically told me I could throw it away. Matt, why would you say that? Why would you not want that one? Oh, wait. Is it from his ex-girlfriend? Bingo! Really?
I want a candy cane. Thanks. That's actually a... Yeah, unfortunately, I will not be throwing this away because it's a perfectly good stocking that I can still use in situations like this. Or you could just give it to Joe. Exactly. Yeah. I'll buy you another one, Joe. Sorry, Janine. Hey, give me a candy cane. Well, okay. The game is I ask questions and you get candy cane. Oh, yeah. It's like the Halloween episode all over again. Hey, all right. Wait, can we... Oh, many candy canes in the menu, right? Yes. We got to see who can fit more candy canes in their mouth. All right. I don't want to sit here.
Santa, how's your leg, by the way? The right one's really, really struggling. Your leg's struggling? I think you need, you should have got the pig ornament. Oh, nice. Thanks, Santa. All right. First question. What is the most popular Christmas movie? Home Alone. No. Elf on the Shelf. Elf. No. No.
Home Alone. No. Elf. No. Night Before Christmas. No. Christmas. No. Santa Claus. No. Santa Claus. Wait. No. Guys, what are you? Oh, Charlie. No. I don't know any more Christmas movies. It's not Charlie Brown? It's not Elf? Are y'all tripping? This is like the biggest one ever. Who's in it? Jim Carrey. Oh. The Grinch.
- That's mine. - Okay. - I want it. - Let's go. - Next question, how many reindeer does Santa have? - 12. - Nine, eight. - Oh my gosh. - Stop intercepting. This is just like the Halloween episode. I literally didn't get any of the questions right. - Okay, next question. - All right, this one's mine. - Who can name all the reindeer? - Me, no. Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, and Blitzen. - What a freaking weirdo. - There's one more. - Rudolph.
What a weird... You're just mad. You're just mad. Yeah. Who can name all the rain news? This is an easy one. This is an easy one. All right, that's good. What is Santa's favorite cookie? Chocolate chip. Why do you throw them? Sugar cookie. Santa, can I have that? Santa took mine. No. Santa ate mine. Well, you have to get another question right. No. All right.
All he wants is a candy cane. Next question. What is Rudolph's favorite snack? Candy corn. I don't know. Right near food. Milk? No. Chocolate chip cookies? Y'all never set these out for Rudolph? Carrots? No, I didn't. Oh!
- Cake, mine's behind the chair. Give me a candy cane. Thank you. - Only because you have no hands and you can't catch. - Carrots are not a good snack, first of all. - Next question. - I got it, this is the next question. How many Christmas lights are on the average Christmas tree? - 132. - Nope. - 1,000. - 1,000. - 700. - 1,000. - 300. - 700. - 900. - 800. - 800. - 600. - Ballpark.
600. No, Santa took mine again. Okay. Santa doesn't give gifts. He takes them. Wait. Whatever y'all have been told about Santa, it's a myth. He's selfish. Did someone get the Grinch question? Santa's selfish. Who helps Santa make his toys? Elves. Elves. Harper. Oh, yay. But it was me. Okay.
In the movie, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, what is his pet dog's name? Max. Yeah!
This isn't very fun. I've only gotten one. Okay, this is an easy one. I don't like these questions. I don't like easy ones. What do you get if you're on the naughty list? Cold. Yeah. Got one. Yay. This is so much fun, isn't it? Yeah, I want to see how many kids get it. She said that really weird. Okay, next question. So much fun.
- It's so much fun, isn't it? - Next question. - It's like when your teacher makes you do an activity and they're like, "Isn't this great?" - Next question. - It's great, right? - Next question! - Okay. - What is at the bottom of a Christmas tree? - Presents! - No. - A stump. - A troll, the thing that goes in the bottom. It's not gifts. - A blanket. - The blanket thing, yeah. What is that called? - What is it called? - A tree stand. - No. - Yeah! Santa got it. - A skirt? Come on. - I choked. - Next one.
What Christmas movie is about a train that takes a kid to the North? Porch Press. Are you a Christmas freak or something? Yes, I am. What plant is hung from doorways encouraging people... Mistletoe. Oh. Santa has had enough. Yo, Santa, you don't... All right, we have three questions left. Oh, yay. Hooray. Santa Claus is named after which saint? Um...
Hey, he knows that about himself. St. Nicholas? I don't feel like Santa Claus should be able to answer that one. St. Nicholas. Also, talk louder, Santa Claus, because we can't hear the mic. What do people put on top of a Christmas tree? Star. Star, angel. Angel. Wait, I didn't hear that one. That was a pear. Okay. I think that was me. Yo. Ha ha.
Is that why you got fired from the North Pole? I'm an angry elf. I'm an angry elf. You should have gone to elf management. That's crazy. What's the most popular Christmas carol? Uh, uh, Holy Night? Yeah! No! Give me it! I intercepted it. I deserve it. Give me it. No, don't do it. Man should play for the Cowboys. Maybe they could win season.
Well, that's all my questions. Who wants to put candy canes in their mouth? I got another game! No, what's the game? Whoever can catch the most candy canes gets them. No, no, no. No, no, no. No, no, don't do that because we need them all. We need them to put in our mouth. Yeah. Well, y'all are no fun. Alright, so just give me the bag. Wait, do it again, do it again, do it again. I'm going to catch all of them. I'm going to catch all of them. Ready? Three, two, one.
- I got most of them. - Yo, that got me nervous. - Okay. - Okay. - No, first open all of them. - Are we playing who can fit the most candy? - No, why don't you pick up the candy? - What? - It's like a pinata. Okay, here's some candy canes for Harper. - Thanks. - Just give us the bag. - Oh my gosh, you're no fun. Remember the last time we played this game someone threw up? - Why are we opening these? I got a question. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Why?
Whoever went to the store pick out the outfits. Okay, I me a river. It's why When y'all say why don't I have a shirt? Second what is this? Yo, yo, it's all candy canes Merry Christmas gel. Oh, thanks Okay, so we're gonna see who can fit the most in their mouth Mav's gonna count for her Kate you count for me. Oh my god. Can you help me open?
Yeah! Yeah, Matt's gonna help me open them. We're gonna see who can fit the most candy canes in their mouth. Me versus Harper. Last time I won. No, I won. I won! Are you serious? You freaking little elf. I won. I won. I won. Wait, these are low-key hard to open. Are you ready? Should we just start now? Alright, go ahead and start. Are you allowed to chew them? No. No, you have to just put them whole in your mouth and let them sit there. I don't want to be here for this. One, two... Why are you chewing them?
Yeah you are. Yeah you are! I heard you chewing! Stop chewing! Cheater, cheater, pumpkin eater! I literally can hear it in my ears. Four. I got two. Five. I got three right here, Cash. Six. Seven. Four. Here you go. Three. Cash. Cash. Cash. Once upon a time, in a small, small town, there was a little girl named Harper who was set out to beat this guy, the throw-up king. Mrs. Claus, you mean? Mrs. Claus better not throw up. Stop! You're biting, Cash!
She's at 12. What are you at? I was choked on my candy cane. 13. Come on, let's get some. Here you go. 9, 10, 14. Almost. 14. 15. 16.
- How many? - 16, 17. - 15, 16. More. 17. - 18. - 18. - Oh, you gotta keep them in there. - 19. - 20. - You put this in, this is 20.
You're like a walrus. You're a Christmas walrus. Oh no!
Stop! Stop it! Stop! Oh, that's disgusting! Oh my god! Say that to help your wife!
- Get out of here. Oh my gosh. - No! - That is not a real toilet. That is not a real toilet. Oh my God. - I used the toilet, sorry. - I'm not cleaning that. - That's not even a real toilet. - Someone's gonna have to clean that. You're cleaning that. - I won. - She did win. - She won.
Why would you do that? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Sorry, Santa. Bathroom or something. Oh, no. Trash can. Use a trash can. We gotta stop playing these games. We really gotta stop playing these games. Look at my dress, man. And this Mrs. Claus sucks.
I was spinning a lot more than I thought I was. Bro, it was coming out heavy. It was like you were leaking oil. Sammy, you're knocking everything over, man. I didn't, okay, I need to change. Wait, wait, I just got a text. What's your text? Texted Cash and Harper, but they didn't respond. Sorry if y'all are in the middle of filming. Oh, this is Harper's mom, by the way, texting this. I'm on my way and was going to stop by Sonic. Do y'all want anything? Yes! Yes! Yes! What would everyone like? Okay, Reese's Blast. Yes!
But I'm cash Piper is me What does everyone want from this thing's oh this thing's way too sticky now Reese's blast Reese's blast I have them in other blasts. Yeah. Okay. Let's see what our Sonic orders are now. What's your Sonic order Reese's blast? Oh
we see that's it harper wants a blast but what blasts are there there's oreo cookie dough reese's sneakers there may be i don't know what else thoughtful can i have a cookie dough blast with water we have water here water your sonic order is a water what size do you want harper um large i'm getting no i'm kidding i'm kidding i'm kidding uh can i have uh a small
Cuz I'm just a healthy little girl. Hey, do we have another like Christmas shirt I can wear? Okay. You know what grinds my gears? You know what grinds my gears? How you broke my elf. Alright. He broke my elf. Okay, my sonic order. Cash wants a... Cash wants a... He's actually more your height now. Hey yo! Oh? You know what's more your...
Wait, Cash, what do you want from Sonic? You know what? I'm glad you ate Sonic before you did the challenge this time. Dude, I know those challenges are always making me about to throw up. Yeah, every time. Okay, I'll take a footlong chili cheese, Tony. Oh, no. Not again. What? What? What's wrong with that? That was so funny. Oh, and I'm not done. What type of drinks I got? Ocean water, Sprite, Coke. I'll take a...
Banana slush. Banana slush. I shaved my legs. While he's thinking, I shaved my legs today with candy cane tree hot scrubs. Ocean water. Ocean water. I'll take an ocean water. I was still talking, but... No way. No way out of everyone. Harper said that. She goes, I was still talking. You interrupt everyone. I was still talking, but... Yo, you want to know something crazy? What? You...
She looks like an elf when she says that. Santa Claus, would you like anything? You want anything, Santa? No. Okay, Santa's on a diet. Would you like anything, Joe? Sonic blast. All right. What size? Medium. I have a challenge for you, Harper. What kind of blast? And if you can complete this challenge, if you can complete this challenge, I will pay you $10. Okay. Really? All right. What is it? What's the challenge? You got to smell my armpit.
Why would you do that? That's just... I said no. I said no, it's not worth it. Come on. It ain't worth the money. Come on. It ain't worth it. I'm trying to think of what I can spend with $10. Like... Okay. Starbucks? Sonic is on the way. Don't do it. Yeah, because when I came back over here and when he jumped... Like, when he jumped me... You got a whiff? Yeah.
Yeah, that's not good. It's not good, is it? No, I can't. No, $10. Come on. But you got to stick your nose in there. Why would anybody want to do that? $10. I do it for free. I would actually like to pay you to do it. Come on, $10. No, I might pass out if I do that. Come in here.
I'm on it. Don't do it. No. Joe, you want to do it? No. Oh, that just seemed like something you would do. If Matt does it, then I'll do it. Okay, somebody's got to do it. Matt, the elf, Santa, you or you? I'll give you $10 to let me do it.
Well, you can dare the audience and they can come and smell it. You guys want to come smell my armpit? That's weird. We're going to literally. Oh, no. Yeah, it represents the ornament you got. Oh, yeah, you guys enjoyed that, huh?
That's disgusting. - What did you guys stop for? - That's actually insane. - Oh yeah. - This is... - Oh! - Oh gosh, stop it, stop it, stop it! - Can you sit back down please? - My armpits don't stop. - Wait, it looked like your Christmas ornament. - You guys wanna smash that mask? - No, no! - No! - No! - Yo, that's crazy. - Guys, I heard that Ellen DeGeneres is a bully.
You think? That's O news. Yeah, for real. I was watching her. Oh, yeah. Like people don't like her. Okay. Yeah. So real quick. Should we invite Ellen on our podcast? Yes. We should do. We should all get gifts for each other. Yeah. But like Secret Santa. Yeah. Yeah. That would have been a great idea to do before we filmed the Christmas episode. Oh. That's really great, Mav. We can still do that. Yeah, we can still do it. Let's go to the store right now.
Imagine when he's like the podcast of the store. That would be kind of fun. I could do it. Like blog style. That would be, that would be fun. No, but I can't do that. That'd be a lot of work. Bobby just did it. I'm changing before we do that. No, you gotta go in that costume. They won't even let you in for sure. Oh,
That's a club channel video. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. That's true. Hey, guys, if you haven't, we might film this on the club channel. Go subscribe to our club channel, LOL Club. Link in description. Harper, so real quick before we end the episode, can you smell my armpit for $10? No. Maverick will. What's in your nose? Is that a foot? I sneezed it. You what? I sneezed it out because, yeah, yeah. Well,
Well, looks like nobody's going to smell his armpit. So we wish you a Merry Christmas. I have another Christmas story. Oh, wait, I thought that was celebrate him right quick. This guy has not looked at me and asked for the time one time this episode. Wow. I thought about it. Wow, man. Truly.
miracle around minute 30 Mav always goes time time what's the time I know I need to leave what's the time I set a clock on my phone this time what's the time oh I don't actually know I was making that up what's the time Joe 38 oh no 39 minutes wow beautiful 39
We wish you a Merry Christmas. All right, let's do one Christmas carol real quick, but we all got to nail it. Actually try. Let's do, what's it called? Greens, beans, potatoes. Tomatoes, ham, turkey. Who's next? All right, ready? Wish you a Merry Christmas. Everybody actually try. I mean, try, try, try. Okay? I can hit this. All right, yeah. Go. Five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. What? Oh.
I thought we were counting. My bad. You go after eight. Why eight? Why do we go after eight? Because there's four counts of music. Ten would make more sense. One, two, three, four. We wish you... What kind of counting was that? Well, you said there's four counts. One, two, three, four. One and two and three and four and...
Wait, okay. Why would you- 5, 6, 7, 8! No, no, no. Why would you at 8, why wouldn't you just restart at 4? 1, 2, 3, 4. Yo, I got braces! 1, 2, 3, 4. Because you would come in on the 1. Oh my gosh. What? That does kind of look like braces. She looks like that girl from Finding Nemo. Fishy, wake up! Alright, ready? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10. We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry- You tried, bro! I said we all have to try! Bro...
No one's gonna try. I will. All right. All right. I should do. It's so inspirational. Something. You're not getting signed by a label. I thought we were actually gonna sing. Okay, let's go. We'll see. Matt started to start. Matt started to start. Matt ain't singing. Okay. Okay. Okay. All right. Let's go. From the top. Make it drop. We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. We wish you a Merry Christmas. And a happy new year.
his armpit when I
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