Matt Walsh Reads MEAN TWEETS
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Okay, we got a classic for you today, something tried and true. We're gonna look at some mean tweets. Well, there are people out there who've tweeted some mean things about me and we're gonna take a look. I had McKenna go and find these mean tweets, which was the easiest job in the history of jobs. Because when it comes to negative tweets about me, there's an embarrassment of riches, I will say. It's ample supply. So let's go through some of these and

We'll find out if I really am a terrible, awful person. I mean, we already know that I am that, but we'll do this anyway. I'm not sure why. If men like Matt Walsh is gonna complain about women in the military, I'm gonna complain about him taking a girl job rather than working in the mines like a real man.

talking for a living is extremely feminine, Matt. If men like Matt Walsh is going to complain, if men like Matt Walsh is going to complain, sure, I talk for a living, but you, on the other hand, can't talk at all. So I don't know who's got the upper hand here. But this is bad news for almost every man in the country because you have to work in the mines to be a real man. But there are only like 500,000 people in the mining industry at this point. So that leaves...

by my count, 165 million men who are not real. That's a tough break. That's a tough break for all of us. Why on earth does Matt Walsh have any fame? Guys like Tucker Carlson can spin clever arguments and have some personal charm. I've never seen Walsh make a clever point.

He's about as charming as a turd in a punch bowl. I don't know. That's a good question, honestly. It is a strange thing. Whenever somebody comes up to me and kind of makes a big deal out of it, I'm appreciative, I'm grateful, I'm humbled. Always a little confused because I'm very aware of the fact that I'm just a guy. That's the thing. You know, when you achieve some level of prominence, you're still very aware of your own just some guy-ness. And actually, I'm barely a guy because I don't even work in the mines. So, you know...

That's the situation. Matt Walsh is one of the most annoying human beings on the planet because on many issues he's very smart, has well thought out arguments, and has a knack for comedic call-out films. But somehow he's an irredeemable moron when it comes to things like anime, kid shows, and vidya games. Yeah, I hear this kind of thing a lot. People are like, "Oh, Matt, you're so insightful about everything, but on this pet issue of mine, you're a moron." I'm an idiot!

Which, okay, I mean, it's possible that I'm a moron on whatever that issue is. I accept that. It's certainly possible. I could be, but also, if you think that I'm, quote, very smart and have, quote, well-thought-out arguments, isn't it possible that my arguments on your pet issue are also possible?

well thought out and that you are the one who happens to be wrong? Have you thought about is I mean, it's possible because like generally, if somebody is smart and thoughtful, they aren't going to be a moron on really any issue. It doesn't mean that they're right about every issue. But if someone, you know, if you know anybody in your life and you think, well, that's a thoughtful, smart person.

They probably are never a moron about anything because if they think something, even if they're wrong, because they're a smart, thoughtful person, there's a coherent reason why they think it. That's what it means to be a smart, thoughtful person. So what you're really saying is,

Matt Walsh is really smart about all the stuff I agree with him on, but on the stuff I don't agree with, he happens to be irredeemably stupid. Which is kind of a coincidence, isn't it? That's strange. It's funny how it worked out that way, right? What are the chances? What do Matt Walsh and a wrench have in common? They're both tools. McKenna, why did that make the cut? Come on. Let's raise our standards. There's no way that that's even close to the...

See the meanest or most vicious tweet we could do here. Let's do better. Do the work. Do the work. If you want to stop being racist, do the work. This one's better. The problem with Matt Walsh is that he's so hot, but so stupid. Well, it's actually, I think it's the opposite. I think it's more the opposite. I think that I'm smart, but ugly. I think it's more, not hideous, like a six out of 10. I think I have a pretty realistic view of my own

physical features. It's about a solid six out of 10, 6.5 on a good day. I'd give me, I'd give myself maybe approach 6.8, 6.9 about 10 years ago, but with age, you know, things start to fall apart. So more of that, I think it's more of that. I'm thinking a lot about the early days of the internet. Remember when it felt like this vast open frontier, a place where you could truly be free, free from corporate oversight, free from tracking, free from

somebody looking over your shoulder, kind of like America itself used to be. But these days, every time we go online, we are being watched. Your internet service provider sees everything, every site you visit, every click you make. And here's the kicker, in the US, they can legally sell all that information to third parties. Your private data becomes just another commodity. That's why I started using ExpressVPN. It's this brilliant piece of a technology that routes all of my online activity through secure encrypted servers. Everything I do online is shielded from prying eyes.

my internet provider, data brokers, all of them. I love the peace of mind that it gives me when I'm traveling for work and have to connect to public internet that literally anybody can be on, especially if it hides my IP address so data brokers can't track me. Helps me know my data and information is mine alone, and it's super simple to use. One tap to connect, that's it. It works on up to eight devices, phones, tablets, TVs, computers, you name it, it's protected. So if

So find out how you can get four months free by scanning the QR code on screen or clicking the link in the description box below or by going to expressvpn.com slash Walsh by team. Matt Walsh is a f***ing idiot who has a joyless, soul-sucking life. I'm now convinced he's congealed in a corner as an unfun and unhappy adult instead of having a childhood. Okay, so this one's interesting. This one's good. That one counts as a meme tweet. That's what we're looking for. We're looking for Matt Walsh is a f***ing idiot, not...

You know, he's like a wrench because they're both tools. Okay, so this one's interesting because this tweet is, because I followed the rabbit hole a little bit on this one. This tweet is responding to another tweet from somebody who was complaining about my negative review of Sonic 3. And that tweet, the one that is initially complaining about my review, has 200,000 likes. 200,000.

and 4 million views. So apparently there was this massive viral outrage about the fact that I didn't like Sonic 3, and I was mostly unaware of it. Now, I knew that some adult Sonic fans were having nerd spasms about it. They were having a dork meltdown about the fact that I didn't like Sonic 3. I knew that that was happening to some extent. I saw it in my YouTube comments. But I didn't know until I... I didn't know that it was at this level. I didn't know that... And I started, like I said, going down the rabbit hole a bit. And it's like...

There were thousands of people crying for days about the fact that I didn't like Sonic 3. And I was totally oblivious to it. They were just screaming into a void because I didn't like Sonic. And I was whistling along unaware, which is pretty funny. And now we have this tweet from someone who insists that I'm joyless and unhappy because I don't like Sonic. I always find these kinds of comments hilarious because anytime I express any criticism of

some kind of corporate Hollywood CGI slop. I'm always accused of being joyless and unhappy. Is that what makes someone happy and joyful and fun? Or I love it when someone says, cuz I say, yeah, I didn't really like Sonic 3. But why didn't you like it? I don't know, cuz I'm 38, cuz I'm an adult. That's why I didn't like Sonic 3. That's why I didn't like it. What do you mean, why didn't I like it? I'm a grown ass man, cuz I didn't like Sonic 3.

It shouldn't be possible to actually like it. So anytime I say something like that, you get someone going, you must be fun at parties. First of all, I don't even go to parties. So jokes on you. I can't be fun at them. I'm not there. But second, is that what makes someone fun at parties? Is liking Sonic 3? How does that work? What kind of parties are you going to? We're the life of the party. So you're that guy over there. He's a life of the party. That guy's great. Yeah, what's so great about? He loves Sonic 3. That's his thing.

He's over there just talking about Sonic 3, the whole party. And you got some guy, there's a whole crowd gathered around him. He's got his red cup, he's drinking. And he's just talking about Sonic 3, holding court. People are fascinated for hours. I'm trying to make that connection. I'm trying to make the connection between liking Sonic 3 and being fun at a party or being a joyful person in life. So is Sonic 3 supposed to just fill me with joy? Not only do you want me to like it, but it has to fill me with just like,

Watching Sonic 3 should be an experience like going up to the space station and viewing the Earth. It's like going to the moon and seeing the Earth from the moon. Just that transcendent feeling of beauty and joy is what watching Sonic 3 should be like, according to you. I think you might like Sonic 3 a little bit too much is all I'm trying to say.

All right. The best part of pick-me-losers like Matt Walsh is that they so desperately want the adulation and recognition that their insulated conservative bubble cannot provide. They're the kid who hates the kid with the nice house because they're never invited over. Absolute losers. Well, actually, the kid with the nice house did invite me over when I was a...

When I was a kid? Right. I mean, every, I think this is a universal thing. Unless you were the kid with the nice house, which I was not. But every like friend group, you had someone who had liked the nice house with the rich parents and had the big TV and all that kind of stuff. And so I would be invited over to the house. I did hate him, but it wasn't because he had a nice house. It was because, and this is true,

Like this son of a bitch had an infinite supply of soda in his fridge. We weren't allowed to have soda. This kid had soda. He had like a whole fridge of soda. That's how I remember it. I remember a walk-in fridge. I remember going into his basement. It was like Scrooge McDuck. And there was just a soda, just bottles of soda in a giant pool. He would jump into it and swim. And we would not get any of the soda. He would not share his soda. So we'd go to his house and we would drink tap water.

while this kid was drinking soda. So I hated him for that. I still do. So you're half right. Matt Walsh is the kind of guy to call the cops on a kid with a lemonade stand because they didn't get the proper permits. No, you're just, you don't, I'm disappointed by a lot of these tweets, I have to say. I wanted them to be, it's like, there's so many things you can, there's so many valid insults and criticisms about

that you could make directed at me. And so many of these are so off base, because I would not call the cops on the kid's lemonade stand for not having a permit. You think I care about a permit? No, I would call the cops on the kid with the lemonade stand if he's selling lemon flavored Kool-Aid and trying to pass it off as lemonade. And this is something, if you've ever stopped at a lemonade stand in the neighborhood, which I tried to stop at them.

And you don't see it that often these days, probably because you got a lot of these people calling for permits and all this. I don't do that. But if I ever do see one, I try to stop at the lemonade stand because I, first of all, I love lemonade, number one. Number two, the sort of resourcefulness and the ingenuity and the kind of work ethic of a child who's starting a lemonade stand to earn some spending money. I really support that. I want to support it.

But 90% of the time I go to a lemonade stand, I got to be honest, I'm pretty disappointed because it's not even lemonade. If you did not use lemons, and I try to explain this to the kids, like, listen, kid, did you use lemons to make this? Well, no, I used powder. Well, then it's not lemonade, is it? Because he didn't use lemons. Now go inside and get real lemons and bring them out here and make me some lemonade.

You understand me? That's what I say to the kids. It's happened many times. And then what happens is that their parents call the cops on me. So then the cops show up and I tell the cops, well, this kid, this is false advertising. This is fraud. So that's how that would work out. Anyway, so there are the mean tweets. A bunch of people saying mean things because they want me to see it and hate myself. But jokes on them, I already hated myself before this. So there, I win.