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cover of episode The Surprising Link Between People Pleasing & Your Health: A Medical Doctor’s Recommendation on How to Say “No”

The Surprising Link Between People Pleasing & Your Health: A Medical Doctor’s Recommendation on How to Say “No”

2023/11/16
logo of podcast The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Mel Robbins Podcast

AI Deep Dive AI Chapters Transcript
People
D
Dr. Neha Sangwan
M
Mel Robbins
一位专注于领导力和个人成长的著名_motivational speaker_和播客主持人。
Topics
Mel Robbins:探讨了讨好型人格的概念及其对健康的负面影响,并表达了对该话题的兴趣。 Dr. Neha Sangwan:详细解释了讨好型人格的定义、成因、表现以及对身心健康的影响。她指出,讨好型人格源于童年创伤,是一种应对机制,会导致个体失去自我,被外界力量裹挟,长期处于压力、焦虑、疲惫等状态,最终引发各种身心疾病。她还分享了自己的经历,以及如何通过反思童年经历、建立边界、有效沟通等方式来克服讨好型人格。她提出了一个三步框架来帮助人们学会说不:1. 识别自身感受;2. 了解自身在冲突中的角色;3. 与他人沟通,设定边界。她还强调,压力是导致80%以上疾病的根源,建议人们关注自身压力来源,并通过有效沟通来解决问题。 Mel Robbins:与Dr. Neha Sangwan讨论了讨好型人格的各种表现形式,例如总是说“是”,回避冲突,过度工作,以及试图取悦他人以获得认可等。她分享了自己的经验,以及如何通过反思自身行为,来识别和克服讨好型人格。她还强调了怨恨情绪是边界被侵犯的信号,并建议人们关注自身感受,识别压力来源,并寻求帮助。 Dr. Neha Sangwan:详细解释了讨好型人格的医学影响,指出长期压抑情绪会导致各种身心疾病。她分享了自己在医院工作时,通过同事的提醒意识到自己讨好型人格的经历,以及如何通过“我-我们-世界”的框架来分析冲突,并找到解决问题的办法。她还提出了五个问题来帮助人们了解自身压力来源,并鼓励人们进行有效沟通,设定边界,从而改善身心健康。

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Chapters
Dr. Neha Sangwan defines people pleasing as losing oneself to appease others, often leading to stress and losing personal grounding.

Shownotes Transcript

Does this doctor have the health secret you’ve been looking for? Does people-pleasing really make you sick?

Dr. Neha Sangwan is an internal medicine physician, bestselling author, and accomplished researcher.

Today, Mel sits down with Dr. Sangwan to learn the truth about people-pleasing.

 

Topics discussed include:

People-pleasing: What it is.

Are you a “yes” person?

The difference between “going with the flow” and people pleasing.

Why avoiding conflict makes you a people-pleaser.

What your “childhood blueprint” is and how it shapes adulthood.

People pleasing and the link to illness.

What your parents did or said to turn you into a people-pleaser.

Why people-pleasing is a coping mechanism.

Why you can’t deal with other people’s discomfort.

How to trace your people pleasing back to a single moment in time.

Why being stressed, irritated, and tired is a sign that you are a people-pleaser.

Why being a control freak may be a sign of people pleasing.

How to unlearn people pleasing.

How every conflict in your life traces back to childhood trauma.

What happens, from a medical perspective, when you have an unresolved conflict?

The secret reason you’re an overachiever.

How to stop your people-pleasing behavior at work and set better boundaries.

What it really means when you resent the people you love.

Why people-pleasing is a “protection tool” you learn to use in childhood.

The link between chronic worry and people pleasing.

The simple 3-part framework Dr. Sangwan uses to say "no" when you mean "no".

How 80% of all illnesses are caused by stress.

The 5 questions you should ask yourself to understand what your body is really trying to signal to you.

 

You can purchase Dr. Sangwan’s book, ‘TalkRx: Five Steps to Honest Conversations That Create Connection, Health, and Happiness’, here: https://a.co/d/iaVNwiL)

 

Download a FREE audio chapter from ‘TalkRx: Five Steps to Honest Conversations That Create Connection, Health, and Happiness’, here: intuitiveintelligenceinc.com/mel)

 

Follow Dr. Sangwan:

Instagram: instagram.com/doctorneha)

Webpage: intuitiveintelligenceinc.com)

 

Watch the episodes on YouTube: https://bit.ly/45OWCNr)

Check out my book,* The High 5 Habit*: https://a.co/d/g1DQ8Pt)

 

Follow me:

Instagram: https://bit.ly/3QfG8bb)

The Mel Robbins Podcast Instagram: https://bit.ly/49bg4GP)

LinkedIn: https://bit.ly/46Mh0QB)

TikTok: https://bit.ly/46Kpw2v)

Sign up for my newsletter: https://bit.ly/46PVnPs )

 

Want more resources? Go to my podcast page at melrobbins.com/podcast).

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