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cover of episode Why Do I Have Few Memories From Childhood? Deepen Your Healing & Find Answers With Dr. Nicole LePera

Why Do I Have Few Memories From Childhood? Deepen Your Healing & Find Answers With Dr. Nicole LePera

2023/1/26
logo of podcast The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Mel Robbins Podcast

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Dr. Nicole LePera
M
Mel Robbins
一位专注于领导力和个人成长的著名_motivational speaker_和播客主持人。
Topics
Mel Robbins: 本期节目讨论了童年创伤与记忆缺失之间的关系。许多成年人无法解释自己的情绪反应,因为他们记不起童年创伤。童年记忆缺失很常见,不必为此感到自责。童年记忆缺失是正常现象,许多人都有类似经历。童年遗忘症可能与大脑细胞和记忆的自然衰退有关,也可能因为记忆深埋潜意识中,需要触发才能回忆起来。此外,成长环境中缺乏回忆和讲述童年故事的习惯,以及童年创伤导致大脑无法正常储存长期记忆,也会导致童年记忆缺失。神经系统失调会影响记忆的形成,情绪不成熟的父母可能会导致童年记忆缺失。 Dr. Nicole LePera: 情绪不成熟的父母表现为不可预测性、疏离感或过度控制。他们无法有效处理自身情绪,会对孩子造成负面影响。不安全的环境会使儿童神经系统处于生存模式,影响情绪调节和记忆形成。持续的压力和缺乏支持会使儿童选择逃避或麻木。缺乏安全感和持续的压力会影响记忆的编码和提取。皮质醇水平过高会影响海马体功能,从而影响记忆。不需要回忆具体的创伤事件就能进行疗愈,关注当下行为即可。疗愈的目标是调节神经系统,使人能够更好地应对日常压力。创伤并不仅仅指重大事件,日常生活中小的负面经历也会对神经系统造成影响。创伤的定义应该更广泛,包括那些被忽视或遗忘的小事件。创伤与在遭遇负面事件时获得的支持程度有关。在缺乏情感支持的环境中,儿童会变得高度警觉,以适应环境。冷暴力会对孩子造成严重的心理影响,使其产生羞愧感和不安全感。疗愈的第一步是关注当下,提升自我意识。每天设定一个时间段进行意识检查,提升自我觉察。意识检查包括觉察自身注意力,并选择将注意力转移到当下。将注意力集中在呼吸、感官体验或身体感受上,可以帮助提升当下意识。

Deep Dive

Chapters
This chapter explores the common experience of having few childhood memories. It discusses the reasons why this happens, including childhood amnesia, trauma, and parenting styles. It also normalizes the experience and assures listeners that they are not alone.
  • Many people have few or no childhood memories.
  • Childhood amnesia is a common phenomenon.
  • Trauma and parenting styles can impact memory formation.
  • It's normal to not remember everything from childhood.

Shownotes Transcript

In this episode, you will learn how to deepen your healing by understanding how your parents may have created silent trauma that is still impacting you as an adult.

 

I want to introduce you to a woman who has had a really big impact on my own healing. 

 

She is the renowned psychologist and #1 New York Times bestselling author, Dr. Nicole LePera, who you may also know as The Holistic Psychologist).

 

Today, Dr. LePera will normalize the common experience of having few memories from childhood.

 

This is something that I struggled with silently. I personally have very few memories from my childhood, and I assumed there was something wrong with me.

 

It was only when I started sharing about this lack of memories online that I realized I wasn’t the only person who can’t reminisce about their past.

 

I now understand why this happens. I also know there is nothing wrong with me.

 

And if you have very few memories from your childhood, there’s nothing wrong with you either.

 

Today, we are digging into parenting styles and how your childhood experiences (whether you remember them or not) are still impacting the way you respond to stress as an adult.

 

The research and tools in this conversation will help you understand not only why it’s so easy to get triggered, but also how to deepen your healing journey now that you do.

 

This is one of those episodes that I also know you will be sending to family, friends, and siblings because there is so much empowering information here.

 

I personally made all three of our kids listen because I both recognize as a daughter how my childhood impacted me – and as a mom, I’m also very aware that my parenting style has impacted my kids.

 

And, Dr. LePera so beautifully teaches us how to take control of the rest of our lives as adults.

 

Xo Mel 

 

PS: After you listen to this one, listen to “Take Control of Your Life: A Toolkit for Healing”) if you haven’t yet, because I’m sharing details from the last few years of my healing journey.

 

Plus, there’s a companion workbook) to help you go deeper.

 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

 

  • 3:00: So many of you wrote in about this particular detail of trauma.
  • 8:00: Childhood amnesia – What the heck is that?
  • 9:30: Here are 3 reasons why you don’t have many childhood memories.
  • 11:30: What do psychologists mean by “dysregulated nervous system?”
  • 15:00: Introducing my friend and world-renowned psychologist, Dr. Nicole LePera.
  • 17:45: What’s an emotionally immature parent and how do you know if you had one?
  • 24:30: Two big reasons why your brain shuts down in childhood.
  • 28:00: Do you need to remember your past trauma to recognize it in yourself?
  • 35:00: What does it look like in real life when you start to heal your nervous system?
  • 37:30: Is trauma only for those who’ve lived through a big, horrific event?
  • 44:00: Here is why the silent treatment can be harmful. 
  • 48:00: Here’s your first tactical step toward healing your body and mind.
  • 53:15: Feeling cynical about your own healing process? You need to hear this.

 

Disclaimer)

 

If you uncover or have a history of trauma, consider enlisting the support of a trained therapist. This podcast episode and the companion workbook are not meant to be a substitute for therapeutic support.