#87 Life Hacks & World Records ft. Caleb Elliott
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Hello, folks. Welcome to the Nateland podcast. Here are the Brian Bates, Aaron Weber, and we're back. I feel like we're back. The last episode was like, that's what people wanted. Yeah. Just a fun time. Just making jokes. Look, I think we, you know, I would say we jumped the cow. Now to clarify, this episode is going to come out after some other ones. This isn't coming out this week. Oh.

So we probably got back on the cow. Yeah. We might be still being the cow. So, but we did jump it. I think we're still be, I think every episode they're going to see is we're, we're, we're, we're rolling in. Yeah. You know, we're really cooking now because, uh, you know, it was like back to just making jokes. Right. Being fun. Right. We remember who we were. Remember, remember why we were and how we got here. That's right. I'll let you guys know what's up. And then now I'm back. Yeah.

I got them on my platform. I'll let y'all hear about it. And then I'm back off. Now it's back to being dumb. My platform was just calling Brian a cow, by the way. It's not a very big platform. Stands with it. But I'll stay. Doesn't deny just. Yeah. Sorry you guys had to hear it. That should have been a private conversation. Yeah. Are we rolling? Yeah.

No, it was – yeah, I think we've been on – I don't know where this is going to be, that this has come out. I'm about to be gone for a month, so that's why, whatever this is. One month. It's going to be awesome. Traveling, great shows. I'm excited about the shows. Also, Mike Vecchione, March 19th, 630 and 845 at NashvilleZanies.com. I think it's April 19th. April 19th, sorry. Why does –

Laura, she'll be fired. Get rid of her. Pin doesn't work. I don't even write April. I mean, I know it's April. Why would I spend the time to do this? There's no point to it. Pin doesn't work. There's no point to any of this. We're back, baby. We're back. April 19th, 630 and 845, NashvilleZanies.com. We're shooting a special.

So, uh, the 18th, we're doing a live podcast. The 19th, we're shooting my vacuum special, uh, Nate land, uh, productions producing it with 800 pound gorilla. I'm, uh, directing it. Uh, 800 pound gorilla is awesome. They're, they, they do a lot of this. They know how to do this stuff. Uh, and then, uh, but it'll be my first one that I produce and direct as well. Vecchione is super funny. Vecchione has been around for 20 years. Uh,

If you like my comedy, it will be what he will be doing. So he's the best. Vecchione, someone that... He's a comic that more people should... I mean, a lot of people do know him. His album did really good, Muscle Confusion and stuff like that. Thanks. I'll change it now. April. April, just so when I go back to it. April 19th. Thanks. And we're done. And...

but it's changed. So, but he will, Vecchione's someone that's like a great comic and this one he's doing clean. Some of his other stuff hasn't been clean. Not that it's ever been really that dirty, but it's, this one's clean and this one's, I mean, he's just, he's one of the best. He's a real, he's a comics comic. Every comic loves him.

and you know, he comes on the road with me, he destroys on the road. So, uh, if you can come down to Zaney's, come to that, that will be a big night. I want y'all to, you know, it's fun when you get introduced to someone. I'm not, you know, I'm not trying to act like I'm introducing him, but whatever. It's like, it's fun to be like, yo, y'all should all check this dude out. Like this dude's the real deal. So, uh, all right, let's start off. Uh, Emily Drago, Dragoo.

Dragoo? Yeah, it's got two O's at the end there. It's a crazy last name. D-R-A-G-O-O. Emily Dragoo. As a mom of three young kids. Emily Dragoo. She married into that. She married into the Dragoo family. The Dragoo family. They come from...

They live on the top of a hill. It's like vampires. I know. Is that where the, Emily, do you have to drive up the long driveway? And they're the only house, your husband's only house is at the top. And then the Dragoo family. As a mom of three young kids, the only way I can work out is to run in my neighborhood before they wake up. Needless to say, running alone in the dark as a girl can be very scary.

Especially when you're in the Dragoo family. But once I started listening to Nate Aaron and Button Up, Blazer, Bicker, the Little Boys, I'm happy. And Button Up, Blazer, Bicker, Little Boys, I'm happy to say I don't work out in fear anymore. I do have to stop and sit on the curb and laugh so hard sometimes, though.

I read that. The wrong cadence. I do have to stop and sit on the curb from laughing so hard sometimes, though. Did I read it? That's right. I read it like, I do have to stop and sit on the curb from laughing so hard sometimes, though. That's awesome. Sorry we made fun of your name. But the Drago family. Or Drago. I don't know. I hope it's Drago.

Nick Cordell just wanted to reach out and say that Aaron the Gout Webber did a great job in Cape Girardeau. I only know that because you said that earlier today. Oh, yeah. Girardeau. Yeah, how would you have said that? I don't know. Girardeau. Aaron was so nice after the show as well as he was exciting for my wife and I to get to meet him and chat for a bit. When I get excited, he's like, hold on, let me read.

There wasn't much of a line. When I get excited meeting... No, I'm joking. I had that part. To meet him. He was so nice after the show. When I get excited meeting someone, I usually turn into a rambling fool while my wife keeps her composure and doesn't overdo it. So my question, do you guys like it when people keep talking? Or is there a certain point where you were like, okay, dude, nice to meet you. You now leave me alone.

I think for Bates, I think it's an answer for the audience. Yeah. Do they want him to stop? Would they, when would you, you can let up. When would you be like, okay, this is enough. They usually offer to take a picture. Yeah. So they know to kind of wrap it up. Let's get a picture. You know, let's wrap this thing up.

No, it's great if you talk. I mean, sometimes you can tell when you meet people that's nervous, they don't know what to say. It's also always great to come up and just be there to take the picture. It doesn't have to be no pressure. If you have something you want to say, just tell us. I'd say if you have the presence of mind to even be thinking about that, you're probably not being annoying. Yes. Oh, that's 100%. Yeah. Yeah. Like this guy's, yeah. Sounds like his wife got it.

They were both great. You remember meeting them. This is the couple whose son we played the video. Had all of the episodes memorized. We talked about that for a while. They're a great family. Awesome. I've met them too. Kaylee Horn. I made a little piece of printable art for the folks. It's available on Etsy to purchase digitally and print on your own.

Link included. All right. Hard copy. I went ahead and bought one for us. We can put up. Oh, that's very cool. Unreal. It's got a lot of our greatest hits on there. I mean, she's got some new stuff too. The banana peeled backwards. That is. Yeah. Turler. Devil's beating his wife. Yeah. She's very up to date. Cole's butcher makes an apple an apple. That's awesome. Yeah. Sit over here. Yeah. Where to put it? Yeah. That's awesome. First time I've ever heard of Etsy.

I don't really know what that is. It's like eBay for this kind of stuff. All right. Is it different than Pinterest? I don't even know what Pinterest is. I don't know what Pinterest is. I don't either. I've heard of them, but I don't know what they are. Yeah, I don't know what Etsy or Pinterest is. Those are two completely different kinds of sites. Okay. That's all right. We can talk about it later. Faith Domster. It's better than Doomster. Well, you said dumpster. No, it's Faith Domster. Oh.

I do think Nate should look into adult ADD. He does have many symptoms. Learning disabilities are also associated with ADD. Highly intelligent people have it too. It's just how the brain processes. It's good to know not to be labeled, but to get help. It can be a challenge in relationships, the low level frustration, impulsive behavior, and lots of issues can be helped when you understand more how your brain works.

So the way I would take it is I would be able to go like, so if me and my wife can, or me and Bates, we get an argument on here. I will know my brain's much better than yours, but I'll say this to myself. I'll go, my brain is light. You're Nate. Your brain's light. Yours better than these people you're talking to. And so then I'll ease into it. Okay. Okay. That's good to know.

Figured it out. That helps. You know, if I get asked something ridiculous, I'll go, hey, calm down, dude. You're playing, you know, it's like. Your chess and we're checkers. Yeah. Yeah. I'm Michael Jordan. You guys are children. Go easy on them. Don't bring the heat. They can't handle it.

But the hard part is then you get done talking. I'm like, well, I was thinking about that the whole time. Right. Then I have to go, say what you said one more time. I have to remind myself. You can't do that and talk at the same time. Yeah. Yeah. Because it's all kind of crazy. Yeah. So I got to be like, when I feel you walk up, be like, you have to stop 10 feet from me. Let me prepare for the dumbness I'm about to enter. And then once I accept what I'm about to get into. Yeah. Yeah.

That makes sense. Thanks, Faith. Thanks, Faith. Thanks, Faith. Rachel Sheehan. Sheehan. I don't think Nate is dyslexic. In an episode of Nateland, Nate said that he stopped doing good at school because Daniel Rucker...

moved in and took the spotlight. But he also mentioned that Daniel moved in within a couple days of the time that Nate was injured falling down a cliff, somehow not making the connection at all. It sounds to me more like traumatic brain injury from the fall down a cliff rather than Daniel Rucker stealing Nate's brain function with some sort of voodoo magic. Wow.

I still think it's Daniel Rucker. Also, Nate swaps L's and R's when he's speaking, not just reading, as in we're instead of will. Oh, I do that. I've never heard anyone do that.

That's so funny. Also, Nate swaps L's and R's when he's speaking, not just reading, as in were, instead of well. I have never heard anyone do that, not even other Tennesseans. I don't know if it's a family manner of speech or part of that potential brain injury, but maybe instead of dyslexia test, he should see a neurologist. I know traumatic brain injury sounds awful. It's not great, but it's pretty common in the U.S.,

All right. I got a lot to do. We're one more common way from just taking me out back and shooting me like a horse. Yeah, these were a couple of the nicer diagnoses. What do the other ones mean? They're just like... It's just more serious, I guess. Oh, really? It's like worse? These are the fun ones. Yeah. I think my whole family, we have brain problems. Bunch of idiots. Bunch of idiots. Yeah, I do have trouble with Will and where... I have a big...

I mean, nah, I can't put that, I can't, like, I don't know how to do it. So, but. All right. That's why you make jokes, you know? That's why you just do a thing that's on stage and it's like, well, you got to either come along or you don't get it.

So if you ever get a talk show, it's time to say we'll be right back. We'll be right back. There you go. Oh, wait. We're be. When I say we're, we're be right back. Or will. We will. Yeah. We will be right back. There you go. We'll. We'll be right. We'll be right back. Is will not how you say it? No, you hit it. Oh. Well. Well, now you're getting into a Bengals thing. All right.

I'll just say that. I'll just go, see you soon. Because I will be seeing you soon. Yeah. See you soon sounds like the show's over. Yeah. But it's more correct. See you soon. And then it's like. Yeah, in like 90 seconds. Yeah. In the commercials. Yeah. Yeah. We'll be right back.

Jonah Foster. I just came across Aaron's old podcast, Somebody Stopped Me. After listening to the first episode, I'm very glad somebody stopped him. That's great. Listening to Aaron rant about chocolate, Coke, and comedy was everything I imagined Aaron Land to be. I don't even remember what he's talking about. But yeah, the irony is not lost on me that my old podcast was called Somebody Stopped Me, and I did six episodes. Yeah.

And stopped. And you stopped. You stopped yourself. I stopped myself. Yeah. Not even six. It wasn't even consistent. It was like two months of them. It was a train wreck. I listened to one. I thought it was good. Thanks, man. One out of six? Yeah. Appreciate the support, dude. Where's it at? Everywhere Podcasts are found. Oh, wow. I think it's still up. You've been quitting thing up. If we ever have to miss a week, we'll just roll one of those. Yeah. We're playing Aaron's old podcast. Somebody stop me.

and see how far you can get. No, I bet it was great, Aaron. You probably been doing comedy about a year at that point. Were you?

Two years. Two years. Did you have guests? No. A couple episodes, maybe. A couple, maybe out of six. Do you have a two-year comic that thinks he can rant for an hour? Do you know how hard it is to talk for an hour? I do. I mean. They were like 20 minutes long, dude. Okay. Okay.

That's a comic thing. I don't want to make it familiar. You should make fun of it. Bill Burr goes on his own and talks for an hour or two. It's Bill Burr. It takes a long time. I love a two-year comic. I'll just riff for an hour. What was the thinking behind the title?

I was going through a thing where at open mics and stuff, I was doing this like, ooh, somebody... I was saying somebody stopped me as a joke, and then I just liked the name of it. I didn't think that I would stop that quickly. Now I really regret the title now. So you put the title, and that was off of...

You doing like a danger field thing? Kind of. Yeah, not danger field, but that kind of, yeah, in that vein. Somebody stop me. That's a perfect open mic. Here's what I can tell you, open micers. I know, because that probably killed in the room. It killed like one time. Yeah. It's funny because it's like, that's how bad, I will say it's,

open mics can be like that because you're performing for the same people every week. So you, you kind of end up performing for that room. So you make, and like you doing that is like kind of funny, but you stopped it. But so, I mean, you did stop. You stopped. Why did you stop? I don't know. Life, life, you know, life got busy. Yeah. He wanted to become a good comedian. What if we asked, when he asked you to do this podcast and you're like, I can't, uh, can't do Mondays. Pretty tied up with somebody. Stop me. Yeah.

Working on episode eight. Yeah. Got some of the backlog. That's the best when someone starts a podcast and they're just very random. Isn't Prince Harry in like whatever, you know? Probably. I think they started one. I think they've done one episode or something. Maybe two.

Yeah, the key to anything is consistency. And then, like, that's what we had in our, it could be better. We were the worst. I make fun of you. We recorded, the whole beginning was recorded on the, not even the real microphone working. Hannah Wade, in 2019, comedian Volodymyr Selensky, Volodymyr Selensky was elected president of Ukraine.

At the time, he was starring on a TV show where his character accidentally becomes Ukrainian president. With this in mind, if Nate Land accidentally became real country, what positions would Brian and Aaron hold in the government assuming Nate would be president? What laws would he pass? That's a big assumption. Yeah. Secretary?

Not of anything. Not even of state or anything. Just your secretary? Yeah. Not mine. I think you'd be my secretary's secretary. Assistant to the secretary? Assistant to the secretary. Aaron would be your secretary and I'd be his. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. Aaron. Yeah. What would you be? I don't know what you'd be. I'd head up like the presidential fitness program. Yeah. I'd be the first lady. That'd be your agenda? Yeah.

That's right. Yeah. I want Nate Land to be healthy. You've got a lot of way to bring it, fellas. Cancer research. End it. Good night. What would y'all's fake job be if both of y'all just give real jobs? I guess I'd be, you know,

Transportation secretary. Transportation secretary. Something like that. I like roads. I think I could be, you know, what about me being a broadcaster? Was it George Costanza says? Yeah. You know, I say all those fun things about the games. I like sports. I like sports. Yeah. I don't think y'all can handle it. Handle the fake Nate Land government?

Yeah. You ever heard of improv where they go, yes, and, and you're supposed to keep going. That's the point of this is being comedy on a podcast. Right. So when I say, I don't think y'all could handle this. And then you go the fake. Well, now it's over. Now no jokes are being made. Well, we just threw out some and you shot them down.

Did you listen to the joke? Master of shooting down. Yes, Ann. Did you listen to the joke that y'all shot out? This is supposed to be a higher level. People are listening to this. That's my favorite refrain. Yeah. Y'all might be having fun. People are listening. I know we're just sitting around a table right now and it seems like we're all just doing a good time, but there's a lot of people listening to this and they can hear your voices when y'all make those jokes.

They're already gone. As the president, they've both been assassinated. And I may or may not have something to do with it. I'm probably up. There's definitely some news channels going like, I don't know. Did he do it? Did he not? Like, I didn't do it. I did it sloppy enough that, you know, that's what happened. Yeah.

I'd be a president. I would just do something. I killed the two people. Vice president. What do you speak of the house? Like, isn't that the who goes next if I die? Yeah. So I did the country a favor. I got rid of these two problems and then whatever else below that, I'll just take chances. Right. What's below that? Who's next? Secretary of state fourth, I think. Yeah, there you go. There you go. That's Laura.

And now I regret it. The whole time I'm doing my... Now Laura's next to me and the whole time I'm reading like, Dear America. And she's like, you know, I'm like, America of United States. She's like, United States of America. I'm like, I'm doing my speech to the union. Let me do my union speech. What is that speech called? State of the Union. State of the Union. I'm doing my State of the Union, which is her behind me, rolling her eyes. Hey, if you're not going to be on board with these ideas...

And then I'll just accidentally, she never killed Aaron and Brian. Just say it accidentally. Into the mic? Golly, I can't believe I killed Aaron and Brian. Maybe I should do her too. Anyway, is this on? Chris Lee.

I've recently come down with some health issues, one of which is I'm starting to go blind. Oh, man. Recently, my family was trying to find a warm jacket, winter jacket for my daughter. I walk over to one of the mannequins because I noticed that he's wearing a pretty cool jacket.

So I reach out to fill the material on the arm and it feels durable. So I go to fill the inside and I get about two inches below my wrist when I realized there's a man in this jacket just looking at me with a very confused look on his face. All I could do was ask him if the jacket kept him

relatively warm, but she acknowledged that it did. I then pulled my hand from his back and walked off to find my family. When we got outside, I told my wife what I had done. She literally fell on the ground. That's so great. I mean, that's Chris. I'm so sorry for your, where you're going through, but that's amazing. Couldn't have happened to a better guy. Chris. That's, that's amazing. That's unreal. You put that in a, I mean that, you know,

That's like, I'd close on that. The guy was standing pretty still. I mean, the guy just let it happen. You'd be so confused. I understand that. You're just stunned. What is this guy doing? Yeah. Feels good. It's so great. So great. Just feel it.

Uh, Chase Newman. I once interviewed for a golf course superintendent position. It basically came down to me and another guy. I didn't, I didn't get the job because of the question. What are some ways you went above and beyond your normal duties? I thought of so many afterwards, but literally couldn't answer the question when I needed to cut to a few years later, I'm interviewing for a sales position. The same question comes up. I knew I had to answer this time, but again,

I couldn't think of anything on the spot, so I immediately started making up a story on the fly. About halfway through my dumb, made-up story, I stopped and was like, guys, I'm sorry. I'm making all this up right now. Needless to say, I did not get the jobs. My buddies and I got a kick out of it still. I like that you did that, Chase. Those kind of questions are...

I would honestly, I would think you asking that question is I'm bored with the idea of interviewing someone. So I'm going to just say this to you. And I would almost tell you, Chase, you could lie. Because there's no, the person asking, there's no possible way they care about what other ways. Like you wouldn't even be able to, how would you know other ways that I've gone above and beyond? You know, I can't pinpoint. Like I would be weirded out if you could. You go December 5th.

I worked at a grocery store, and I went to a woman's car, loaded it. Didn't have to do that. We weren't even supposed to do that. Got fired because of it. About 2 p.m. I went above and beyond. How would you remember the time? I think that's a very common interview question. I know, but that would show me that no one's thinking of new questions. So they're just going, that's like a...

asking that question is just someone that's not, they're not even giving you a chance because they're going, hey, when have you gone above and beyond? You're like, when have you gone above and beyond? Ask that. Could you say it? No, you couldn't answer it either. No one can answer it because it doesn't make sense because no one cares about this answer. So if you don't care what the answer is, don't ask the question. That guy doesn't care. The interviewer, Chase should have just kept lying and just said, I would have been more, I mean, he should have just kept lying and just say, I made it up.

And then they'd be like, oh, wow, that's interesting. Because there's no way. And then they go, name a time you worked well with the team. Yeah. Just questions like that. I played basketball. We lost every game. So I don't want to bring that up. Yeah. I mean, it's just very when you're like, there's no really. These are, I don't know. You should be. The person that is hiring that person doesn't seem like they like the job. So maybe it's good you didn't get it.

I'm on Team Chase. I don't feel like you are. Well, I don't think Chase is even on Team Chase. I think he agrees with the interviewer. No, Chase is on Team Chase. Yeah. Yeah. Why would he not be? I just think your resume, you put all the stuff that makes you look best, and then they're like, well, all right, tell me something you did that actually went above and beyond. And if you don't have a good answer, it's...

What would you say? What have you done that's been above and beyond? Well, it depends on what the job is I'm interviewing for. You're spot on this podcast. I went to Staples today and bought that frame and that Etsy. Oh, there you go. That was nice. Yeah. That was a good answer. Thank you. Yeah. Ran to Staples. When the jokes came down, where were you?

That's what you're being so you're so busy with the I got there. I ran for snacks. You got snacks in the frame. Yeah, that's good. Julie Elaine Strothman. Julie. I always like the name Julie.

My friend and I had a season pass at Valley Fair in Minnesota during the summers of 2017 and 2018. We started a weird habit of dressing up on the wild thing roller coaster and buying the pick, mostly just for fun and giving our friends a laugh. We got pretty serious about it. Rules were one, we had to look normal.

entering the ride. We had 30 seconds on the ride up the first hill to change into costume. We had to remove our costumes before exiting the ride. The photo booth worker wouldn't let us purchase our last pick, which was just eating Taco Bell on a roller coaster because we weren't supposed to have loose items on a ride. And these are the pictures. Oh, that's great. That's crazy. Bathing suit. Bathing suit.

We've got, I mean. They're in showering clothes. Shower caps and a loofah. We've got. And they went all out. Nuns with the crucifix on them. She's praying. Yeah. That's amazing. That's great. That's some real deal. Yeah. Getting that, getting changed into that swimsuit. Man, that's very funny. That's crazy. How do you, yeah. Yeah.

That's very funny. That's a fun, that's fun. Yeah, why not? Yeah. I like the last one there. Like, we can't have that photo of the Taco Bell. Why would you not be able to, I guess because that person doesn't want to get fired. So you let them take Taco Bell? You'd be like, I didn't let them take Taco Bell. No one did. Yeah. All right. Just eating Taco Bell. Emily Crawford. I just saw on Food Network that there is no problem leaving ketchup out after opening it, but if you put it in the fridge, it stays redder. Yeah.

So color is not important to you in terms of catching? I think it's plenty red. I'm colorblind. And I have trouble with greens and reds. So I don't think I would ever notice. Really? Yeah. I've done the colorblind test. I can't see. So when you're driving, it's just a free-for-all? No. It's not that bad. Do a colorblind test and just go to the first one. And don't tell me the number. I've done it like it's... All right. So click those images right there at the bottom. Yeah. Like, you know, just one of them.

So I see nothing. Really? I don't see anything. I don't see it. There's supposed to be a number. I can kind of see the 12 right below that one. Okay. I can see that's a five down there in the middle. But like that one that you're on? This one right here. I see nothing. 11? 21? Huh? 74. Oh, no, I don't see that. Yeah. I didn't know that. I'm surprised. Yeah, yeah. Add it to it. One more. Take one more step to the back of that barn. Yeah.

I'm a horse. I'm just being like, giving a carrot. I'm like, I'm getting a lot of carrots today for some reason. And there's another person hiding behind the barn with a shotgun. And I'm like, this is my day. So you're a horse and I'm a cow.

Yep. It's both. But I'm about to be shot. Well, I'm about to be slaughtered. That's true. Oh yeah. Cause you're going to wander in. Yeah. Yeah. You would be. That's true. It's all yours, Aaron. Yep. What am I? Hmm. I don't know. Your well that's free. Free Aaron. Free Aaron.

I don't know if you're a whale. We're doing farm animals. I'm a horse. I'm a cow. I guess you're a whale. What did you want to say? Pig? I mean, we're running out of stuff. Chicken? Goat? At least let me be on the farm with y'all. I'm trying to hang out. I'm not 3,000 miles away in the ocean. It's the beached whale. You need the room. You can't be bogged down by a fence.

You gotta be free, man. That's fair. I'll take it. Yeah. A whale's a good thing. A whale would be good to be. They're important. They're important. Big mouse. He can eat a lot.

House cat make fun sounds. Yeah. I think you'd be a nice well that would come up. I think you'd be one of the fun wells. I would put on a show. Yeah. I see people out there whale watching. I go, let's give them what they want. Yeah. Blow a little water out. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah, maybe not every day, but you'd be like, yeah. You're like Joe DiMaggio. It's his first time out here. This kid, I got to play my hardest for him. Wasn't Joe DiMaggio? The largest mammal, but doesn't have to be. Doesn't have to be. Yeah, that would be you.

These hats we're wearing. A folk, Matt Parrish, lives in Memphis, gave us these Grizzlies hats. The Grizzlies are killing it. Grizzlies are killing it. John Morant, I mean, it's what the Grizzlies needed. Not that they've had great players, but to have a superstar like John Morant, it's super fun, and we're making it. Yeah, we've got to be Tennessee. I think Nashville and Memphis needs to come together.

We need to make that happen. Just in basketball. There's just a, I feel like it's Nashville, Knoxville, Memphis. I feel like everybody's kind of alone. We should have a peace treaty like in Jackson. Yeah. Yeah. We should all just be like, yo, man, we're all Tennessee.

yeah we play you know some reason we're all kind of broken up because we've all had our own identities memphis had its identity with music and all that forever and they were the place to be right now nashville's the place to be knoxville had the world fair so they were they were the place to be everybody's kind of been like yeah take the turn of being the

And now it's time to come together and all of us collectively. Now as Nashville is as dominant as we are, those other two cities should come together. I'm on board. And it starts with this, buddy. And bow down to us in Nashville. All of us in Old Hickory, let us know. I don't know. All right. So this week, we're going to talk about Life Hacks, which is, I think, the one that got us off the rails.

Yeah. But we're going to make it fun. I think it's been fun. We also have a guest we're going to bring in. Caleb Elliott. Well, I'll wait until you say that. I got excited about it. I'm a big Caleb Elliott fan. I feel that. That feels good. Does that look weird? Be honest. No, I mean, your hair is already like it is. Come on. Come on. Thanks, man. I'll take that as a... I don't know how you meant that. All right.

We've been good. This is a nice night. I meant that in a positive way. Caleb Elliott. Come on. Hey, welcome. You came here. You and Aaron were working together this weekend. And Gerardo. We're in Cape Girardeau, Missouri. Nate, I'm glad you brought that up because I've been wanting to show you this. I've been waiting for a few days to show you this. We went and saw...

The world's largest soda fountain cup. Whoa. In Cape Girardeau. I've been calling it the Missouri Statue of Liberty. Yeah, that's funny. And it's, I mean, Caleb and I went, everybody's like, you got to go get a picture with it. So we went and there was a line of people to get a picture with this. It's outside of a gas station.

And it's just a huge Rhodes, which I guess is a chain of gas stations out there. Huge cup. Now, Nate, here's the question I've been waiting to ask you. A lot of people are commenting, finally a cup big enough for Nate, all this stuff. Do you think for me? For you, yeah, because on your Tonight Show, you talked about how you like the big cups and everything. Do you think that in your lifetime, you've drank enough soda to...

to fill up this cup? And I did the math, but I'm curious what you did. No, I would imagine, though. I'd imagine it's more than I think. But I think I've done a healthy...

I think I put a dent in it. You put a dent in it for sure. I think it's more than I – I don't know. I don't know, though. Do you know what size drink you get usually? I don't like the big drinks. I talked about that one. That day where I talked about it on The Tonight Show, I did have a big drink because that was all – but I tried to even – even if I got a –

a large meal or an extra large meal, I will sometimes still ask for the medium cup because I just want the, it's too big. Yeah. And I just don't like holding it. That's the only reason. It's not like I'm against that soda. Do you know what size that is? Ounces? No.

I don't know. Whatever the... Well, I was trying to... So this is the world's largest soda fountain cup. It's 4,730 gallons. Okay. Okay? And I think they actually... At one point, this was filled up with lemonade. I think they had to fill it up once for it to get the world record. Now it's empty. Okay.

But that 4,730 gallons is 605,440 fluid ounces. And as we all know, one can of Diet Pepsi is 12 fluid ounces. So that means this holds 50,453 cans of Diet Pepsi. Yeah, I doubt I drank that much. So assuming you started drinking Diet Pepsi the day you were born. Yeah.

You've lived 15,668 days to today. That would mean you'd have to average 3.22 cans of Diet Pepsi per day. From now? Since the day you were born to now, to drink that much. So if I would have drank... So I didn't start... Obviously, the day I was born, I was about one. So there...

No, I don't know when I started, but it was not drinking a lot. I mean, we weren't allowed to drink, so we had a water rule. Right. We could only drink water if we went out to eat. So let's say you started on your 10th birthday. I don't think so. I mean, you got to be 20. I would say 20.

So now I'm 22 years in. So if I get another 20 years, which I should if I keep my soda habit going. Yeah. So then I could do it. At two Diet Pepsis per day, it would take 69 years to drink all of this. Wow. Okay. I mean, so. So it could be. That could be done. You could do it. It could be done for sure. Yeah. Yeah.

And I bet people do it. I bet people are working on it without even knowing. Without even knowing. That could be done. I could, you know. I think I would be a lot. I think I would probably like the Krispy Kreme. I would be. It wouldn't be a little disappointing, but being like, well, still. I'll put in some more. I bet you're up to that blue already. It's up there. The bottom? I was going to say above the roads. Yeah. Like right here? Yeah. All right. That's still a lot.

Yeah. It's nice to see a truck behind it to get the dimensions right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. When does the podcast start? Are we going to start with that or is that? No. That was quite a while. I was excited. I was excited to bring this in. I've been waiting for five days to bring this up. Yeah. Well, you go. No, it's good. No, it's fun.

Yeah, it's just on the side of the road. It's just on the side. I drove past it accidentally. I missed it. It's just right next to a gas station. Oh, you went looking for it. Oh, we went looking for it. Everybody was like, you got to go see it. Yeah, you missed it originally when we drove past it. Right. He was like, keep an eye out for a giant soda fountain cup.

And there it is. And it was that eventful. And there were a couple other groups of people out there trying to get a picture with it too. Oh, really? Yeah. We waited. This is it. Like the Taylor Swift wings? Yeah, it's like their mural. Yeah. You know? It's a big deal in Cape Girardeau. Yeah. Yeah, I would get a picture with it.

Yeah, I did not kind of regret it. Oh, you refused? Yeah, I didn't. I wasn't a big. I didn't really. It was cold. Yeah, it was really cold. I'm not a big fan of that. Did you take the picture? Obviously, I did take the picture. So you were outside? Yeah. That's me. That's me behind the camera, guys, on that photo right there. So you could have just switched places? Yeah.

Easily. I just took a selfie by myself. You want to ask someone else? There's a big group out there. We were the last one, thankfully. Yeah. And he didn't want to be in anyway. Yeah. So we had our time with it, you know? Yeah. Now you got to go back to it. I'm good, you know? I think I get it. I know, but like with the fact that you could have just been done with it, took a picture of proof that you were there. I'm pretty done with it. You know what I mean? I know, but what if someone...

goes hey man did you ever be honest have you ever seen the world's tallest I'd probably lie and say I didn't go you know what I mean I'd probably be like no I've never seen it before never even heard of Cape twice last twice last year yeah they go to it

They go a bunch. I would like to see someone that's been a bunch. Yeah. That would be great. I make my annual pilgrimage. Yeah, I go every morning. To the world's largest soda fountain cup. Is Rhodes the business that it's at? Rhodes is, yeah, that's a gas station chain. That'd be like a, you know, a Twice Daily or a Mapco cup. Yeah. What's Twice Daily? It's a shell. Oh. It's a shell station. And they call it Twice Daily? That's what it's called, yeah. They don't call it Shell? You can call it either one. I think I call it Shell. What do you call it?

Shell's the gas that they serve, but twice daily is the market, I think. Twice daily is the market. You call it Shell? I've never called it twice daily. I've never called it. I think that's a, I wonder if that's an age thing. Yeah. I've never called it that either. Do you call it? I just call it a gas station, usually. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, but you would turn around. I don't know if I, I wouldn't know what you were talking, like, I know what you mean saying twice daily, but I don't, I don't think I would. Once daily. Yeah. Yeah.

All right. So today we're talking about life hacks. Yeah. Come on. Here's one for you to keep a perfect crease in your pants. Take your pants off before a performance. Yeah. Seinfeld. Yeah. Yeah. It's a good one, right? Yeah. Yeah. But that's if you're wearing like slacks, you know? Yes, and... There we go. It was a funny Seinfeld episode. Yeah, it was. It was a good life hack. Another one...

Do you watch Seinfeld? Yeah. Caleb, you ever seen Seinfeld? I haven't actually. We had a big conversation about this this past week because I haven't seen much of anything. You set him down and told him? I kind of came out the Seinfeld closet. You haven't seen any TV shows? Anything good, I haven't seen. How old are you? I'm 24. Yeah. Yeah. Getting up there. So...

I haven't seen much of Seinfeld. I mean, name something else I probably haven't. I know I haven't seen any of your movies, Brian. Breaking Bad. He hasn't seen Forrest Gump. I mean, it was all Forrest Gump. Yeah, but he's so young. These are old movies. Thank you, man. But I want to say, these are movies that are referenced so often, you don't even realize how often they're being referenced. But I'm him. Because at his age, I wouldn't have seen any. I've never seen, I don't think I've ever watched any Terminators.

I've never watched like, have you seen Terminator? Yeah, I've seen Terminator. I've at least seen Terminator. Have you seen Shawshank Redemption? Shawshank? No, I haven't seen that. Yeah, we spent probably an hour and 15 minutes. On the drive down, y'all wanted to watch it? Yeah. We were in a hotel room together for five days. So I'm like, let's find a movie to watch.

Yeah. We spent an hour looking through movies. He hadn't seen any of these. I don't even want to start. Let's just keep going back. Yeah. There's nothing better than the beginning of comedy when you get to do this. Truly. I swear. Some of my fondest memories are when you go on the road and you would...

you'd have to share a room. Yeah. That's the best. Yeah. I mean, if you want to trade, you know what I mean? That'd be awesome. Yeah. You can go back anytime. Yeah, that's true. You know what? Yeah, yeah. You let me know. I'm just letting you know, you are in your fondest. It will never get better than where you're at. Oh, wow. Yeah. Well, that was so encouraging. I just saw your app. No, I'm joking. I don't mean to.

We're not jumping the cow, everybody. Caleb, hang on to whatever money you got right now. All right, Caleb? No. No, the other side of those references is to keep chocolate getting in your hands, cut your candy bar with a knife and a fork. Yeah. Wait, what? Is that a life hack or you're just saying that from? That's a real thing. Yeah. Larry David, somebody did that and Larry David learned. That's a real life and put it in the show. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So. Yeah, there you go.

So bring in the heat. Why would you do that? To keep chocolate from getting on your fingers. You just use a fork and a knife? Yeah. Do you do that? No, but it's a... Okay. You keep a little bit of the wrapper on. We're talking with a banana. Yeah. You keep a little bit of it on. You don't open the whole thing and then just hold it in the heat. Yeah. And it melts all over your hands. But what if you want to eat it on a plate?

Like, yeah, like everybody else does. You don't want to stick out. Cut, whatever. Knife and a fork. I don't know if it's a knife and a cut. Cut Larry. You need to cut Larry. Cut to Larry. Cut to Larry. All right, I'll stick with the life hacks from not my own, but when you want to cross out a word you don't want people to see, instead of scribbling over it, write random letters over that original word.

Does that make sense? Do you have that website I sent you? I don't know. And these were like on the internet? Yeah. Like you got all these from... Encyclopedia. Okay. So you would...

So if you have a word, you would just make other letters. Yeah. Instead of marking over it, you can still see it. Put other letters over it, and then it's just all. These aren't things I came up with. These are from lifehacks.org or something like that. But the fork and knife, that's all you, right? That's Seinfeld. That's where I learned it. Oh, okay. Got you. Yeah. I didn't know if you were just like, you made these up. The website where they show. Okay. I'll find it. That sent you. All right. Use your sunglasses as a prop to watch your phone.

Like, if you don't have a... Yeah. I mean, dude, I honestly... If this is just...

Well, the first one I gave did 30 minutes on, so I thought, boy, this is going to be a tie a ribbon around your luggage at the airport. Yeah, yeah, but that got us off the – like, I'm – that – so. Yeah. All I'm – like, it's – we're just trying to make jokes. People listen to this. We're having fun. It can't just be reading just some easy ways to get around –

I mean, try a few more and let's see. Next time I need to prop my phone up and I'm wearing sunglasses, I know what I'll be doing though. Yeah. So you put your sunglasses down, you put the phone up, and then the phone overweighs the sunglasses and it moves the whole time. Okay. When taking a picture, squint your eyes to make your smile look more genuine. Oh, if you're trying to fake a smile? Like, does this look like I think this is a great episode? Yeah.

Wow. What was the trick that you guys talked about when Jay Cutler talked about? I got a little trapped over here. When you're taking a picture, you take your tongue and put it at the roof of your mouth? Yeah, you put your tongue at the top of your mouth. I've been trying to do that in every picture I've taken. I don't know if it's working. Well, you got a lot to pull up. Yeah.

Use plastic egg crates to store away Christmas ornaments. I mean, that's crazy, dude. You look like... Unbelievable, man. Like you bought your season tickets when the Grizzlies moved in Memphis. And that's what you wear to every game. It kind of matches. I mean, you're Titans, but if you lived in Memphis, this would be you. Now, this isn't Titans. No, I know. I'm saying your life...

how it is in the Titans when they first came, you got tickets, you sit at the top. If you were in Memphis, you would just wear this. You look like the Memphis version of you. Yeah. Yeah, basically. Well, thanks, guys. How different would your life be if you had grown up in whatever the Lebanon equivalent of Memphis is? And now you have season tickets to the Grizzlies. To the Grizz. Yeah. You'd be down there. Yeah. I love it. Getting to the top. Excited about Penny Hardaway. Yeah.

I would remember when Memphis, University of Memphis was Memphis State. Do you remember that? I remember that. I had a hard time calling them, I think, University of Memphis, like whenever it changed. I remember when it changed. Yeah. Yeah. Aaron, maybe you should just show them instead of me reading them. Just read one. Okay.

Okay, look. Okay, does your room smell bad? You tape a dryer sheet over the AC unit and turn it on. Yeah. Take those dryer sheets here, put it on the back of a fan like that. It's like putting air free. Yeah. That is unbelievable. Wow. Yeah. I just don't see how this is enjoyable for people to hear. Like, it's like we're just reading stuff that they should. Here's the thing, Nate. You've got life figured out.

Okay. I'm not saying that's what I figured out. No, I'm serious. You don't need these life hacks. Yeah. Okay. The rest of us were running around. It's chaos out there. Yeah. I need stuff like this. So you need a podcast that's going to just list. So instead of just going like, why don't you email a link out to everybody listening? We're going to read the link. If we can get an email list serve going, let's hop on. Let's just pull up another article and let's read an article. Podcast. You know? Yeah.

This is from the New York Times today. Yeah, I'm going to tell a joke when it comes to me. Just keep reading. Caleb, you should get off the podcast. You should go, you know what, dude? This is not the one I need to be on. This one hurts. This will hurt my career. Maybe. Look, rightfully so.

Is there something to go off of? I mean, it's hard to say until I tell them, wrap a wet paper towel around your beverage and put it in the freezer in 15 minutes. It'll be ice cold. Yeah, you should have known before you said that out loud that that probably wasn't the one. Piling on.

I mean, I don't know. Yeah, let me see. I'm a big on. We got some. All right. Nate Land fan. Bounce batteries to see if they're good or bad. You drop them on a table from about six inches. If they give one small bounce and fall right over, they're good. If they bounce around, they're dead or on their way out. I mean, can you? I just, I don't like.

I don't even know what to go off. You know what's going to happen, Nate, is you're going to be in a hotel room pretty soon, probably next week, and you're going to be trying to turn on the TV, and it's not going to work, and you're going to have to test whether those batteries work, and you're not going to remember how to do it. And you're going to be like, man, I wish I would have cared a little more. I carry two batteries with me everywhere I go. So, dumb question.

There's not a question. Clean out an old lotion bottle and use it to store your keys, phone, and money while at the beach. Well, just be a psycho. I mean, that's what that would be. You go, I don't know if you can afford to go to the beach if you are having to use old lotion bottles to carry your belongings. I mean, I don't know. The fact that you saved up and you finally are at the beach for a big vacation.

And then you put a lotion bottle and you're like, put all this stuff in the lotion bottle. I guess because no one will steal the lotion bottle. Yeah, yeah. How big is a lotion bottle to get your phone and keys in? I mean, it's pretty big. You get the big old Costco. It looks like deodorant kind of shape. Yeah, or whatever kind you use. Like a shampoo bottle. I'd have to use lotion because I wouldn't need the sunscreen.

You would be, yeah, you would dump it on you then get scratched by the keys. And then you'd be like, God damn it, dude. What is, and then you're like, you gave away everything, dude. Now everybody's, now a crowd's kind of around you because they know where your wallet and keys and phone is. Yeah. Before you were alone. Okay.

And now when do you put it in, in the car privately? I think at the hotel. At the hotel. As you're getting ready. But you're not, you got to get in the car to probably drive to the beach. That's true. If you're having to do this, you definitely are not staying on the beach. No. So you're a few miles inland. And so you got to drive to be, so you're in your car and you go, where's the water? Where's the lotion bottle? And she goes, I bought here. It's got lotion in it. And it is a big fight.

And then you've been 30 minutes dumping all the lotion on the ground. If anybody puts this together, they know exactly where your wallet is. And then you put it on your phone and stuff and put that in there and then just leave that laying on the beach. So when someone goes and digs through your bag, cause you're, you took a boat out to the middle of the equator. I mean, you're never that far from your stuff. And then, and they're gone, God, man, I wish I could steal this.

God, but this guy got me. Where was it? He goes, is he getting arrested? Where was it? Lotion bottle. God, dead gumming. That's good. That's good. If you're doing this, there's no way you're staying on the beach. Motel 6, a couple miles inland. If you can't find kindling, use Doritos to keep a fire going. Well, if you're in that situation, if you can't find kindling, then I don't think you have the Doritos. If you're in the wild...

I would say I've had Doritos more than I've had kindling in my life. So you're freezing. You're lost. Thankfully, you have a bunch of Doritos. Yep. That keeps the fire going. Well, it's just, yeah, last resort. If I need to get something going, Doritos are going to be there in your pantry. I don't have kindling around. So you're at home. Let's say I'm at home trying to get my solo stove set up. Everything's safe. Everything's safe. And then someone's like, y'all, the fire's about to go dead. And you go, I don't have any more kindling at my home.

Because I'm at home. Yeah. Oh, can you grab that bag of Doritos from the kitchen? Can I go in there? You have to think about it. I do. I mean, how is it worth giving those firewood? What if we just go inside? You know? It's like, I don't know, we're having a good time. Because, I mean, otherwise, that's what I'm saying. If you're lost in the woods is when I would think this would become really important. Right. Yeah.

This means you don't have kindling. You're in the woods. Yeah. You're lost. You need a fire. Yeah. But you have multiple bags of Doritos. Yeah. If you're backpacking through the woods and you don't have a lighter, but you have multiple bags of Doritos on you, you've made some error. Well, I guess you've made a fire. Fire's already going. You're in the woods surrounded by kindling.

Yes. Now that's where you've taken all the kindling and now there's no more kindling. Yeah. And I got to sacrifice the Doritos. Yeah. Okay. It'd be a tough day. Use different colored nail polish to identify your keys that look alike. I don't know. I mean, I need that one actually. You do? I think that's a good one. You go through a lot of problems with getting your house. It just takes a, takes a long time. Takes you extra time. Yeah. And I live in, I don't live in a good part. Yeah. It's for a janitor. Yeah.

You know what I do? I got my keys. I got them copied at the Dollar General. And you can pick a little fun design. I got a little American flag. That's how I know it's my house key. Okay. You don't need nail polish. Yeah. You can just get a special key. How many keys do you have? You have a lot of keys. You think this is more keys than I should have? What do you have? How many keys are there? Three? I got my house key. Yeah. I've got a key to my shed. I've got a PO box key. And I've got my car key. And then this is like a little... Wait, there was... I think...

So there's two for the P.O. boxes. So you carry both P.O. box keys. I do, yeah. I might...

I need to go by there. I know, but why does one not work? I think they probably gave me two keys and I never took the extra one off. It's like your Planet Fitness. That's the Planet Fitness of your keys. And you got a bottle opener? Yeah, my dad got it. This is my stocking this year for Christmas. It's got a little screwdriver at the end of it. You never know. I just like to be ready. I get that. I get that. Uh-huh.

two p.o box i mean you go to how often you go to your p.o box you don't have a mail box i have a regular mailbox and you also have a p.o box yeah i got a p.o for what people send me stuff dude you just have it on your website yeah how do they know about how does your somebody stop me all the fans will write in yeah no i've had people from this podcast send me stuff and i had to set one up for my uh

MailChimp's thing. So I needed one. It's a small one, dude. It's not a big... It's not a room. I never had a P.O. Box until this podcast. Really? Yeah. Okay. I'm going to have to get one after this. Yeah. That's what you're supposed to do when you're doing comedy for three years. Make sure you get a P.O. Box. I didn't know. That's going to take you to the next level. Well, how are they going to mail me funny shirts? Somebody stop me. Yeah.

Put your smartphone in a glass at night to make your alarm louder. I mean, I don't know how much you can't hear that alarm. I mean, it's got to be pretty loud, right? You put it in a glass. That's not a glass, is it? Oh, that's like a toy paper roll. Yeah, you put your iPhone in like a sink or a bowl. It's going to amplify the sound. Yeah.

Take pictures of friends holding items you've lent them so you don't forget down the road. I mean, I wouldn't even want to live this life. I would rather just lose this stuff than be like, all right, Jerry, here's my shovel. And you just got to hold it. And then you got to go take a picture on your phone.

So I don't forget, Jerry, I know where this shovel's at. And five months later, you're just looking through small pictures. Oh, David, David Gilman. That's where my shovel's at. Hey, Jerry. And he's like, I didn't take your shovel. Oh, that's funny. That's funny you said that. Well, thankfully, I'm kind of crazy. And I took a picture of you holding my shovel. Yeah.

And then he shows you a picture and it's just him in the garage going, there's no shovel. And he goes, well, where's the shovel? And then you're like, huh, where is it? Did he lend it to someone else? I would be on board with that. Like, yeah. I'm taking pictures of, I don't know, I had something, but I forgot. It doesn't matter. Here's one. Oh, go ahead. I'll read them. Mm-hmm.

Label your water bottle by the hour to make sure you're drinking enough water each day. That's a good one. I've seen you have that water bottle that just tells you straight up. So you can just buy them like that? Yeah. But you could just be like, I guess you put a mark. When you finish it, put another mark. And then that way it keeps it. So you know, I need to drink eight of these today. I don't even...

You know how you're not life hacks supposed to make your life go quicker, right? Yeah. This is you're being, I mean, you're going to spend three months just trying to put all this stuff into your life. Stack your clothes vertically to see them all. I mean, it's like some of this is like, I mean, some of it I would tell people, hey, just do figure it out. A lot of these life hacks should just be do go in your closet. You figure your own system. What do you think? I think those are near the end.

Oh, yeah. I was waiting for it to be like regular stuff. It's like something that's really important. You're like, well, I mean, that's like, you imagine someone just comes in a conference and they go, I have trouble when I put my clothes away. I can't ever find the ones that I want. They go, huh. What if you did them vertically? A, you got to figure that guy knows what vertically means. I have trouble vertically. Yeah.

Someone says like vertical or horizontal or something. Sometimes when those people say that, I'm always like, what? I get horizontal because I think of horizon. Oh, horizontal goes sideways and vertical goes up. Yeah. Yeah, I always get when someone says like they go, you know, it's like horizontal or something. I'm like, I'll just go. I'll find it. Up and down. Or side to side. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. You just call it that.

Yeah, people like to use the word horizontal. A frozen, wait, to get the build up residue off your shower head, tie a baggie of vinegar. Just kind of gave up. Is that all? Put a pool noodle underneath the fitted sheet to keep your kids from falling out of the bed. Whoa. That's a good one. Yeah, there you go. You can call child services if that's the solution. Yeah. You know?

The kids, what kind of bed are they in? I mean, how big are the kids too? Well, you fell on the bed a few times, right? Yeah, I was on the top bunk, but we had a rail and a railing, but I just, I would get by it. So this pool noodle wouldn't have stopped you at all? I don't know. It's like, imagine if you had someone, you know, you had some relatives come spend the night. This seemed like you have an aunt that's like,

I brought a pool noodle. I guess if you needed babies and they had to sleep in a regular bed. Right. But you would have to be aware of that situation coming enough to bring the pool noodle unless you just actively- Just carry one around. I think if you carried a pool noodle around, I think you would never use it. It would not be-

And whoever packs the trunk would be eventually, that would be the end of the marriage. They couldn't handle it. Because they would go, if you don't get this pool noodle, you know, and they'd be like, well, this one time we need. Can you imagine spending the night in someone's house and you go, hey, do you have a pool noodle? We don't have a pool. He goes, I know, but you take it. You have like a pool noodle? Just so the kids don't fall out of the bed? You're like.

Well, how high is the bed? Pretty high. You know, they're rolling all over the place up there. Use toothpaste to clean hazy car headlights. I wonder if that works. I feel like that doesn't work. I mean, we have photographic evidence of it working right here. I doubt that that's. Yeah. This is lifehack.org. This is what these people do. So one, maybe if you're in a hotel running out of charges, I mean, the TV usually has a USB plug-in. I don't know. You know.

But I did figure out a way this weekend. I got the USB HDMI cord, and then you plug the HDMI cord into the back of the TV and then plug that into your iPad or phone. There you go. You just stream everything. There you go. That's the way to do it. There you go. That's a fun way. That's a life hack. That's a life hack. That's a fun – or you can take a Roku sometimes. But this one is easier because Roku, you've got to connect to the internet. It's a good travel. Just that adapter that connects to –

whatever you know either your phone or ubc or your laptop or whatever whatever and then buy that and an hdmi cord and then i mean at this weekend it was i just unplugged the hdmi from the hotel and put that right there and then you just screen and it just shows you watch anything on your phone netflix hbo yeah that's a good one that's a great uh all right uh

put a small amount of water in a glass when you microwave your pizza to keep the crust from getting chewy. I don't know.

Have you heard that? I think I've heard that. I've never done it, but I don't know if it should have been read on a podcast. I think I tried. I was about to launch into my story. You got a story about this? Yeah. I mean, listen. What's your story about? I remember seeing this. Somebody said you put a cup of water in when you microwave, heat something up. I think I tried it once, and I don't think it worked enough to do it again, so I've never done it again. It works good in a pan.

If you put a pizza on a pan to heat it up and then cover it, like put a little water in the pan, it works. Really? Yeah. So you guys take that with you. You know what I mean? There you go. Fill plastic water bottles a quarter of the way full and lay it on its side. That way you can fill it with water later and have ice cold water on the go. Fill plastic water bottles a quarter of the way. And then freeze it.

So you fill it up on the side, freeze it on its side, so that way there's ice all the way up and down it vertically. This says nothing about freezing. Oh, that's what it means. Yeah, it says fill a plastic water bottle that's a quarter of the way full and lay it on its side. That way you can fill it with water later and have ice-cold water on the go. That's all it says.

So like, I don't, I mean, that must've been me. I must've left out the most important thing. Yeah. And put in freezer. Yeah. You're like accident. I accidentally left off. The only reason you would do this is put it in the freezer. Oh, cool. Life hack dude. Turn your water bottle side. I like that. If you, out of that sentence,

You go on. Let me cut it down. I'll take out, you know, put it into the main, the whole point of it. Yeah. All right. All right. We got some world records. All right. So if you guys. Olympics going on right now. Yeah. World records being set every day. I watched bobsledding the other night. Just like the race car one.

uh no that's a boxcar racing oh okay what's what i'm not familiar with bob wait no is that the one they do it alone it's like the yeah it is like you're talking like it looks like a race car yeah yeah yeah i don't think anybody would call the race car but i would love to hear you yeah over there right now going where's the you guys uh caleb just walking around guys where's the race car

thing at and they're like what you know the race car thing that goes down there I get that in the luge mixed up what's the luge I don't I don't get them mixed up that's on a sled the luge is just the one dude no laying down on a sled

Okay. Yeah. All right. Oh, yeah. You can do doubles too. Yeah. You would think. That's a little uncomfortable looking. Yeah. That doesn't look like. There seems no reason for that. If there's double luge, there seems you would, if you're in that, you would go, well, what's the point? The guy on top especially. Yeah. The guy on top is like, I don't, is it just so the guy on the bottom doesn't die? Yeah. There's no reason for the double luge. I just can't imagine.

Somebody had to say that out loud. They had to be like, you know what would make this better, honestly? Like what if you put someone else on it? Yeah. What if we put a guy on top of you and you go, oh, okay. I don't know. You know? Yeah. That does make – and then I think Simon told a joke about that bobsled. Because that should be bobsled because it's like that's just – it's just Bob on a sled. But world record. Didn't even try. Yeah.

But that, yeah, the double luge just makes no sense. I never even heard of that. Yeah, well. So if you were forced to have to set a world record, someone had a gun to your head, what would you go for? I mean, that big soda. Yeah. You'd go something that route. You would just do something like that. But like, what would you do? Like have to drink it? Well, that's it. Like an individual thing you have to do. Well, I don't think there's anything you could do.

You wouldn't try if someone had a gun to your head to try something? I don't know why that guy has a gun. If he's got a gun to my head and this is the question he's asking me to do, I'd be like, then you just want to shoot me then. And so what I would – I would come up with something that is a far way to walk. I would be like, all right, I'm going to do the cross country. I'm going to be a cross country runner. And then I would start doing that and then eventually run away. Okay.

I guess that would be what I would tell him to do. I want to be the oldest man to ever live. Yeah. Like you're talking about an Olympic event. No, I'm talking about Guinness World Records. Well, that would be the soda is in the Guinness Book of World Records. But that's not a person. Well, if you make that, you're in it. Okay. I know the object didn't. It's not like that soda cup is the one that's like, well, I did all this. It's whoever made it.

There was a guy in Idaho who, in 2021, set out to set a new world record every week. Oh, man. And he did it. 52 world records last year. Wow. 43 have been verified by Guinness. There's nine left pending review. I think they're new world records that he created. That's the thing. They're adding world records all the time. So he just come up with stuff like, first guy to do this or that.

But it was like fastest time to wrap a person with wrapping paper. Yeah. Most consecutive axe juggling catches. Stuff like that. But he set a new world record every week. Most apples thrown and caught in the mouth in a mouth in one minute. How many? I don't know. Oh, you didn't think to look that up? Well, he did 52 of them here. I mean, I know, but the ones you read, you know. I don't have the numbers on any of them. Yeah, 49 apples. 49 was way higher than I thought. Yeah. Yeah.

That is very funny, though, to not know that number. To put that out and go, you know, most apples caught in someone's mouth. How many? I don't know. Most toilet paper rolls bounce on the head. I have no idea. No idea. Didn't look at it. Didn't want to just let you know what the stuff is, you know. Man counted clouds in the sky. How many clouds is there? I don't know. I don't think he knew.

I counted the most clouds of anybody. Some of this stuff is you're the only one that tried it. Yeah. I think that's a lot of what this guy was doing, right? He's creating his own 101 toilet paper rolls balanced on the head. That's a lot. And then he has to convince Guinness that it's worth adding. That's the thing. Oh, like this is a notable. There it is. He just sits there and he goes, hey, this guy's good at a bunch of nothing. Like it would be...

And I'm not trying to make fun of him. I'm just saying this is a guy that you would have. I'm not making fun of him, but...

It's like, if you go hang out with him, you're like, he's fun. You're going to pay for everything when y'all go out, but you're going to have a ton of fun with him. You can't have a regular job and do this. Yeah, you go out to dinner with him. He's going to use the most forks that night. It's going to be great. You're going to pick up the check. When that check drops, you'll watch, you know.

I mean, everything he's done. You know how much time it takes to do this stuff? And you don't get any money. Do you get... I think you have to pay Guinness, too. Well, I was about to say, guys, we are all world record holders. That's right. Us three. Because we did the longest stand-up comedy show ever. Yeah. Really? Yep. Yeah. Here in Nashville. It was... It's a podcast. I'm just...

That's awesome. I'm technically, this is, I'm doing one right now. I think I'm the first black comic. Yeah. Shout out to our month. There you go. Black History Month. That's why we're here. We did it. This won't come out until March. Yeah. Maybe not. I don't know. Well, he's here in February. Come on.

Uh, so what was it? 80 hours that the first time we said, we've said it like two or three times, but it was, uh, here in Nashville, a couple of local comedians got together, Chad Ryden and DJ Buckley. It was at the East room here in Nashville. And we did it for what? Six days, something like that. Six, seven days. I started stand up the, the day after this ended the first one. Okay. I remember I went to the open mic that Monday night. Everybody was so exhausted because they had just did several days in a row.

But this is the longest. I think the Laugh Factory had the record. They did. Yeah, the Nashville broke it by a lot. By a lot. Yeah, it was like 10 consecutive days. Started on April 12th and ended on April 20th. And there were rules. It had to be 10 people in the audience at all times. I can't remember some of the others. Each comedian had to do... I don't guess it mattered how long you did. No. It had to be somebody on the stage. Yeah, there had to be somebody on the stage...

I mean, we all Hannibal did it. Yep. Rory came down. Rory had the, still the funniest joke.

Where he goes, what if there's just papers everywhere on the ground? And you realize it's just one guy that's up there talking. He's doing it all by himself. Chad Rodden did great. I thought it was such a cool thing to do. And it was really at the beginning of the Nashville Comedy Festival when it first came here. And I think it had a very big part. I thought it was just a very cool thing to do. And I liked it. It was fun. I think I went up a couple times. Yeah.

But just the idea of it was good. And comics came from all over to be part of it. Just drove vans, crashed at people's houses. It was a lot of fun. It's almost like a stand-up summer camp for a lot of guys. You just sleep at the venue. That's awesome. You got to wake up and be in the audience at 4 a.m., stuff like that. It's really, really cool. Yeah. That's dope. Yeah, it was definitely a fun time. How much time do you think you could do? If I had to go up there? Yeah. Oh, man.

I mean, if I had to think of the old jokes, I guess a couple hours that I can think of. But I mean, I, you know, it's hard for me. I can remember my old jokes from like full of my common central special. The Netflix stuff, I have a little bit harder time remembering because it's,

I don't know if I've said it before, but the Comedy Central special is like you're working up to that for 10 years. And so it's like those jokes are around forever. And so you just really remember them. And then once you start doing Netflix, it's like once you're done, you got to get a new act. So you're just changing every couple of years. So it's hard for me to...

I remember the Olivia joke, the dead horse joke. I mean, I don't know if I could go through it, if I could say it all. The iced coffee cream joke, I don't know if I could do. I could probably get it started enough to figure it out. If I have a pure act, maybe I could do two hours, but I think it'd be hard. I don't think it would be just like super easy. And the only reason I'm saying two is because an hour I could do right now for my new act.

So that I could do. And I could add stuff. And I think I could get to two. Man, that'd be hard. The world record is 40 hours. Staying up? Of the solo? Yeah. Do you know who it was? The Midnight Swinger. Who I've worked with before. Oh, really? David Scott. I think it goes by David Scott now. It used to go by the Midnight Swinger. He did it April 29th, 30th in 2013 in Dubuque. 40 hours and eight minutes.

Yeah. That's crazy. Oh, Mr. Showtime. Oh, now he's Mr. Showtime now. Okay. I didn't know he went by the Midnight Singer. Swinger, yeah. That's crazy. Swinger, yeah. Yeah, yeah. 40 hours. Yeah. That's a work week. It's probably repeating some jokes. That is a work week. Yeah, that's a full work week. I mean, can you go to the bathroom, I guess, and stuff? Yeah.

I don't know. Yeah. Hopefully, hopefully they'll let you. You don't have to do it on stage. You got to take the mic with you. At what hour does it go? You go, I don't think this is worth it, but you're already too far. 30 minutes in. Yeah. Well, 30 minutes, you would quit. You think it's like at 10, you're like, I don't, does it matter? 10 hours? A quarter of the way there. You're not even half. I mean, yeah, you got another 10 to get to half. Man.

Was there a record before that or was he just like... I don't know what record he broke. I'm doing 40. Like the first day would be 24 hours. So you'd be like... I guess it's two days. I guess you'd have to think about it in days more than... Yeah. Yeah. Just get to the end of the day. That's a long time. He does a lot of music. Monday, Tuesday, then you're like, you got to go work the rest of the weekend somewhere else. You got to do...

Yeah, light me at 35 hours. Do you know who holds the world record for most sets in one night? Aaron Berg. Yep. It used to be held by Steve Byrne, who lives here in Nashville. Is it real? It's in the Guinness Book of World Records? I don't know. When I Googled most sets, it came up. I don't know if Guinness honors it or not. Yeah.

Yeah, he did 25 sets. Yeah. Wow. Steve Byrne did 13 one night, and that held for a while. They did a documentary on that, 13 or bust. But then Aaron Byrne set out to double it. He set out to do 23. He did two more. He had 25 sets. Yeah. I mean, that's running around. You're just nonstop. It's crazy.

You're going show, show, show, show, show, show. It's a lot. The most I did in a night was seven in New York. And that's really hustling, right? That was hustling. I mean, his has got to be starting super early, and you've got to be just – everything's got to really work out. But Steve Byrne did 13, which is a ton. 25 is crazy. It's just different. Steve Byrne probably did it – there wasn't as many rooms –

Not saying it's – but it's super hard for Aaron, but there's at least other – probably a lot more rooms to at least go do. But, I mean, he had to get on it, dude. Aaron had to get on it. I remember when he did it. Yeah, I mean, 11 hours. It took 11 hours to do it. Yeah. I mean, so you probably got to – hopefully there's a 3 p.m. something, 4 p.m. something. You know, like there has to be something like that. But –

It's very, very hard to do. I mean, yeah. And just how much, who would you, how would you even know what you're talking about at that point? I mean, when I did seven sets, I would do five, four or five a lot. But when I did seven a night, it was even by the end, you're like, I don't know if I've said this joke

I've had trouble with that sometimes in even doing, when you got a full weekend of shows where sometimes you're like, wait, you just get kind of lost in a joke. And then you're like, wait, if I set this joke up right. And then you, cause you just like, I'm doing so many shows. You're talking so much and you got to try to, that's something you got to work on. You got to try to remain focused. But yeah, that's a lot.

Seven spots is what I did. I'm sorry. He did 25. I still think what I did is harder. I want Aaron to hear it. Aaron, what I did was harder. No, I'm just kidding. The world record that they said is the hardest to authenticate and that's probably been fudged the most is oldest person. Because up until the last really 100 years, birth certificates,

Things like that. It was up until at least the 1900s, they just didn't have a good way to authenticate. So people would come out and say, my great-great-grandfather was 145. And then you got to try to- He said that high? People have- People claim to be that high. Oh, really? Yeah. And then you got to try to authenticate it. And it's really, really hard. Now, everyone who's alive should have had a birth certificate. The oldest verified person was 122.

That's crazy. There's a lady now who's 119. Really? Yeah. Sneaking up on her. Wow. Yeah. Oh, France and Japan. Yeah. Jean Calment of France. 122 years, 164 days. And that was in the 1800s, or most of her life. 1875 to 1997. She died when I graduated high school. She was 25. She was born in 1875. She lived 97 years. That's so crazy. 1900s.

Yeah. 1875 to 1997. I mean, you got to just be like, I mean, what you've seen is crazy. Yeah. You've just seen everything. You saw. You saw it go to be the worst of times, the best of times to, you know, I mean, does she know? I wonder if she even knows what's really going on. Like how many of those last few years is like. How many of those really count?

Tell me something that happened. Yeah. She got stuck in a corner for five. I mean, that's gotta be. Yeah. And that's awesome though. Yeah. And there's still people in less underdeveloped countries that claim to be really, really old, but there's just no good way to authenticate it. Yes. Cause they don't have. You're going off their memory. Yeah.

You're going off possibly 145-year-old. He goes, I'm 101. I think I would know. And I'm like, okay. And the way they would do it, like they would look in a Bible where someone wrote the birth or something in a Bible. Yeah. Things like that. I mean, in biblical times, people lived 900-something. But the oldest authenticated by Guinness is 122. But this 119-year-old. Why do you think we're still less than the biblical times? Sugar? Yeah. Yeah. That's what it is. Big part of it, sugar. Yeah.

They didn't have barbers back then to help them out. The record that they say will probably be the hardest to broke is The World's Tallest Man. He was 8'11 and still growing when he died. Oh, wow. Really? Yeah. How did he die? Well, I think his internal organs just couldn't keep up with his growth. I think he was very young when he died. He needs to be standing next to that cup. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. That's not him. No, this is the current. I mean, that 8'11 is so tall. I mean, you're just... Golly. He could almost sit on a car just without... The top of a car. Yeah. It's like a bar stool. It would be...

Yeah. It would be like you trying to hop up on a barstool that's just above your waist was how he would get on a board and score. He could dunk a basketball without even tippy toes, just standing flat foot. Yeah, you could be like, I mean, I guess Kyle. That looks like. He just enters the room.

And you just, I mean, can you imagine? It looks fake. It looks, I mean, yeah, it does. Well, it's the idea that everybody wants to meet you too. Like everybody, so you're...

There's no private moment of your life. Like you don't, you know, everywhere you go is just every second of your day. Robert, blend in here, okay? I'm not trying to. Yeah. Come on, man. Yeah. I mean, honestly, every second of your day is you're getting looked at. Yeah. I mean, because you never, no one would get used to it.

No. And so like every time you turn, it's one, it's the Joe DiMaggio. It's every, he goes, there's one kid's first time ever seen me. So I'm going to give them all. He goes, and he just touched streetlights as he walks by and they go, God, it's a great story when you saw. Yeah. Wow. That's crazy. And have you heard of this guy who was at one point in his life, he was a legal dwarf and then he became a giant. Wow. He was born. He was born dwarfism. I think he developed, uh,

a condition that forced him to grow so he was 410 in one decade he grew from 410 to 71 wow i mean that's just both lives yeah wow how long did he live not long okay yeah all right so that's not good no no he wasn't pumped about it he died oh he died at 51 51 at seven foot eight yeah he and he went through seven he lived a life yeah like i mean that guy you couldn't you know

You know, like now people talk about always being a victim. Well, good luck trying to be a victim over to that guy. He's like, he's never been normal. He's either a little person or a giant. There's a brief window there. He was killing it. Yeah, the month of August was the greatest time of his life. Like that goes. Whatever it is, 1965, August.

I was 5'11 to 6'3. It was just such a great time. Everything was reachable. I was just living life. Just saw it for a second. September came around and it was just my head in my head every time on every door frame. Just a nightmare. From there on out, it just blew up.

I mean, there's got to be a tiny window where he was. Yeah. Where he was like. He was in the pocket. He was in the pocket. And he was like. Clothes fit great. Living it up. Yeah. It could blend in, dude. People weren't staring at him. And if he would have known, he'd be like, go meet your wife now. That moment. Go, go meet your wife. Do you think when he was little, he married too quick? And then he's like, oh my gosh. And then he was like, I should have held out. I could have got somebody better. And then he got real tall and was like, I'm glad I stuck with her. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, she could have her own complaints. You know, just if your husband just comes home one day and he can't fit in the door. Yeah. And just the amount you got to adjust to. Like, you're just like, it took you so long to get used to one thing. And then you're like, come on. He gets mad. He's like, you think I like it? You think I like it? There's fights. She's been cleaning the gutters most of her life. Now he's out there, not even designing a thing, and he's doing it.

The guy who set the world record for the heaviest person ever, Joe Brower Minnock. He also set the world record for most weight lost and largest weight difference between him and his wife. He weighed 1,400 pounds. His wife weighed 110. What? That doesn't even make sense. What's his name? Joe Brower Minnock.

with an eye yeah he lost 924 pounds so oh good for him so what do you what does that end up being he got down to 476 okay wow that's uh yeah i mean that's like it's impressive that's i mean that's crazy that's like look at you dude you're that's so much weight where's his wife

I don't want to keep scrolling down I'll type in wife she didn't want to be in any of these pictures she just died in she weighed 110 she was probably behind them never lose them in the room you know you get in the house where's John because he's in here he's around here somewhere he's tearing the corner

400 pounds. It's good. The most watched man on TV. Anybody want to guess? Johnny Carson. Yeah, man. I was part of the state. It was worldwide. Worldwide. Yeah. Alan Arka from MASH. Yeah. News president.

I don't know. It's big in Germany. Hitler? David Hasselhoff. Okay. So yes. Okay. Close. I don't know. It's pretty close. Baywatch at its peak had 1.1 billion viewers a week. Isn't that crazy? That's crazy. 1.1 billion? Yeah. This was in every country.

Why did that show translate so well to the rest of the world and some of the other shows don't? I don't know, Aaron. Why do you think? Oh, that's fair. All right, good point. Never saw it.

You never seen Baywatch? Never seen Baywatch. Well, at the beginning. Because now it's something different. You know what it is? It's David Hasselhoff. He's in that. And that's all I got, pretty much. I know. It's like their lifeguards. Yeah, and they do the running thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was. It's David Hasselhoff. Okay. Yeah. You know who he is. He landed at that time. You know who he is? Yeah. He's in the Baywatch. Okay. Yeah.

Night Rider. Yeah. And then, yeah, it's crazy. Baywatch was, it's crazy how big of a show. All these shows that we think that are the biggest shows and Baywatch is like, relax, everybody. They got Olympic numbers. I kind of saw the new one. Yeah, I've never seen the new one. With The Rock and Zac Efron. Oh, yeah. Fun fact. The Rock, I'll tell you what.

He's in everything. He's everywhere. Aaron loves The Rock. Yeah. Do you? Yeah. That's his favorite. Are you annoyed that he's everywhere? Well, I was just talking to Caleb. I was like, man, he is just everywhere. And then we watched the Super Bowl, and he's just screaming on the 50-yard line. I go, what's going on here? I know. It's a lot. I bet The Rock is the best dude and the most awesome dude in the world. He has to be, right? I think so. But then there's a point you're like, yo, dude. I mean, that's what – hey, talk about my complaint. I always think about celebrities. I mean, look at the Super Bowl.

The main celebrities are all doing every commercial now. No regular people are getting commercials. They literally get anybody they want. They're like, I'll do it. I'll do it. All these multi, multi-millionaires. Dolly Parton doing the T-Mobile. Whatever. And I get it's like, well, it's a Super Bowl, blah, blah, whatever. But it's like there's something that doesn't make – I don't know. It's very weird to me that they're – it's like all of you do it? All of you.

Nobody backed off. No one said, no, I don't have to do it. I'm the most famous person ever. Maybe I'll back off this Lays commercial. Maybe let me, you know, Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen just sit there and you're like, yeah, maybe I'll just duck out on this one. There's no reason to...

Get someone that's somewhat on their way up. I'm not saying me. It sounds like I'm saying me. But just, I don't know, something. I remember when commercials switched to where it was using celebrities, and it was kind of a cool thing.

But I don't feel like now. It's like during every... That's all it is now. That's all it is. So it's like it almost maybe it used to be cool because it wasn't every day. So the Super Bowl is the only time you got to see it. And that was fun. But now you're like, these people don't leave. They're in everything. Every day. I see them every day. So now I don't have to...

I feel like they're not as funny anymore either. Yeah. I feel like I didn't see one that made me laugh. I usually don't even get them. Well, they had, yeah. Usually, yeah. Yeah, Larry David one. Everybody's like, like that one. But it's like even, he's selling crypto. Like you're like, what are you? Yeah, that's what I was going for. You're like, ah, dude. You're like, it's the whole point is you're, like, it's like he's too in on the joke of him. And you're like, yeah, dude, you're like, you know, you're selling cryptocurrency. Yeah.

I don't like that you're selling crypto. I just don't. I don't like that it's this popular. Now it's like, well, we're all just pushing crypto. And you're like, who? I don't know. Yeah, why do they want us to? Yeah. But The Rock definitely needs to back off. He needs to. You're like, I mean, I love him. I think I would love him. I think everybody would love him if you met him. We may run for president. Yeah, but it's like.

You know, you're like, it's a lot, dude. You're at every single... You're like, oh, look who's here. Everything. Everything that anybody does, you are available for. In our birthing class, they talk about when the baby's first born. If I say the rock showed up. Yes. The rock showed up to our Lamaze class. When the baby's first born, it's important to have it on the mom's chest. Skin-to-skin contact. Then...

The dad's supposed to do it on his take your shirt off, skin to skin. We're doing this burning class. They put up a picture of the rock.

with his baby on his chest and then i'm up there with a stuffed animal the biggest chest yeah well with my shirt yeah the biggest chest in the world is the example they use wait so you had a stain in the front of everybody with your shirt off not all the way off just okay there it is right there oh they showed this picture yeah yeah all right bitch recreate that yeah yeah that baby's got ink poisoning but it's i didn't take my shirt off

Yeah. That makes it fun if they made you go, Brian, I'm going to take your shirt off. And then they just put you next to that. And then you're like.

It looks like he made his wife get out of the bed. Yeah, he's in her bed. He goes, all right, my turn. Get up. Get up. And she's like, all right, hold on. Scooch. Scooch. She just gets out of bed. Like, no, he wants to take a picture. He's got a big following. So we're letting him take a picture. And then he's like, give me the baby. Give me the baby. And they're like, all right, easy, big fella. Easy. He's so big. Yeah.

Yeah. This was just set. The most points scored in a women's Division I basketball game. Not as much as I thought. This was like two weeks ago. I saw it. The girl from Iowa, right? Kansas State. Okay. I guess I didn't see it. Maybe she was playing Iowa. Like 45 points? It's more than that. 61. Oh. Most points by a guy, 138. Oh.

I mean, that's where... That's some small college. Yeah. Grinnell College, wherever that is. Yeah. You know what record that it seems like it was... It's fair, but it just seems almost... Melvin Gordon set the record for most rushing yards in a game. Broke like a... The Damien Thomas is like 20-something-year-old record. The next week, someone broke his record. 400-something yards. And... Who was it the next week? It was, I think, the guy who was just playing the Super Bowl. Sammy...

How do you say his name? Yeah. But he held it for one week. This is college. Oh, college. The college record. No, it was the other way around. It was the guy from Wisconsin. Melvin Gordon. No, it was a big guy. Maybe a guy from – it wasn't Melvin Gordon. It was the big – Rod Dane? Yeah. I'm talking about single game. Yeah, but I think Ron Dane did it, and then the next day another person did it.

Someone broke after Ron. Type in that guy's name, Dane. Dane? Yeah. No, you might be talking about career rushing. I don't think so. Well, for a single game, there it is. This guy? Yeah. He broke that a week after Melvin Gordon. As a freshman, 427 yards versus Kansas. Okay, 427. But why is the number two 409? Because that guy came along later in 2020. Melvin Gordon was three. Keep going down.

Oh, there it was. All right. So Melvin Gordon, November 15th, ran for 408 yards. And then on November 28th. Yeah. No. Oh, God. Yeah. The next day? The next week. That's tough, man. Next week. He broke his record. Why would they switch him out? Keep going down. I just want to see if Ron Dane's on there. Why would they switch him out? What do you mean? How did he lose his starting spot when he ran for 408 yards? I'm not sure what you're talking about.

Why is he not playing the next game? I would imagine if you have a player that runs 408 yards, you don't go, well, we're going to sit him next week. Like, that's what doesn't make sense. Who are you talking about? The thing we're talking about, dude. The main thing. Yeah, this guy. I don't know. Are they... Wait, is it the same team, though? It's the same team? Whoever this is, Oklahoma, that broke this record, right? You're saying he broke...

Melvin Gordon's record the week before. Oh, they're not on the same team? No. Oh. This is the NCAA. I was looking at a picture of Adrian Peterson. Okay. Okay, gotcha, yeah. You're right. That wouldn't make sense, though, if you were like, is it four or eight? I think you've done enough. You're right. All right. Thanks for bringing stuff in. Before everybody turns on me, remember you ought to sit through that life hack stuff.

So don't go too crazy on the Brian train. And Brian train got to put it together before it got going. The Brian train is just like, can everybody get off and help us attach it? And you're like, I thought we just bought tickets for it. I know, but we need everybody to kind of give it a push. Had a couple of good moments there. The egg crate with the Christmas ornaments. Yeah. That was a real highlight. Clip that one. Clip that one for Nate's Instagram.

Most hours ever on television, Regis Feldman. 16,000 hours. Go Irish. Oh, he's a Notre Dame grad? Oh, yeah. Is he the most famous Notre Dame grad? I mean, not if I have anything to say about it. Yeah, that's right. Joe Montana. Joe Montana. If you exclude athletes, probably Regis. Yeah. You've never had a president? No, never had a president. Hmm.

Ball State? Wait, it's serial killer. Yeah. I was going to say, it's either you or... You impacted more lives than Regis did. That's for sure. Here's a new one. Superhero record. How long is that? 20 years.

he's been Spider-Man and that should tell you, I mean, that's the point that should tell you to go like, it's probably time for us. No one gets out of the way. Everybody just rides, whatever they're doing, they ride it till the, and I mean, look, they're getting paid. So why would you, they're going to keep offering you a ton of money and just no creativity. It's just like, same thing.

For 20 years. 20 years. Hey, you're going to watch them in a commercial now? Oh, yeah. Same people. They're all in that commercial. Guess who's watching the game? Got tickets to the game. All those same people. They're at the game watching it. You're like, there you go. That's cool. So we're just watching the same 40 people watch. There's like 40 people. They're making all of our movies. All of our, there's nothing else.

That's why I think Netflix does good. They do a lot of original stuff. More than like, you know, they're at least making movies. I know they made The Irishman, which is the... You're trying to get Scorsese. I get like trying to... You said that like a superhero. The Irishman. The Irishman. Yeah. Yeah. Scorsese, that's every... All his movies are just like...

Like, boys, you want to get back together? Yeah. It's every call. Hey, guys, I'm doing the same thing. We'll just do it a little bit different. Oh, yeah, I'll do it, man. All right, cool. Different suits this time. He goes, nah, we're going to do it this way over here this time. All right, what role am I? Everybody's the same role.

Why break it? I'm not trying to attack Scorsese. Someone's going to get mad. I get that he's great, but... Yeah. Do you know what the longest golf drive ever is in a professional golf tournament? Oh, is Kyle Berkshire? 784. 787. No way. Did you just guess that? Yeah. 787 yards? Yeah. At the Texas Open. I thought you knew it somehow. That's pretty good. No. You would have won a Price is Right because you didn't even bid over. Yeah.

The guy, uh, it was, he drove it 300 yards and then it hit the cart path and it went past three different holes down the cart path. Some people think 10 cup, that scene maybe came from this where it just keeps going and going and going. I was thinking of a different hole. I was thinking of the one they did on the match. There's one in like, uh,

in Wyoming or something. And there's a hole and you can, I've played it on a simulator and you can actually, if you hit this, it's a year, you got that altitude. So your ball is going to go farther. And if you can hit it to 72, 80, it'll roll down the hill. And they did it on the match, Bryson DeChambeau and them. And I mean, you, you're driving 700 yards easy there.

Like, so that one's, that's probably in a PGA event. The Texas Open. Yeah. So that's an actual like event. But if you, if they ever played the thing, it's like a, you know, that's in my head, that's what I was thinking. So that's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah.

Uh, pro golfer, Mark Witt, the 1991 Ben Hogan Knoxville open drove a ball 300 yards, but it went to the left, went down the fairway, rolled down a hill backwards and rolled backwards. 250 yards going 50 yards. Wow. For a 300 yard drive. Yeah. Uh, yeah, that's crazy.

The longest putt ever made was 125 yards. Was that Jack Nicklaus? No, this was just like an amateur, but it was. Did you ever see Jack Nicklaus? That's one of my favorite clips. Yeah, clips. He goes, look, just do this. You want me to show you how it's done? Yeah. Where was that? He was doing like a pro-am or something like that.

And it's one of the commentators who played golf is like, well, how do I putt this? He goes, just do this. And he hits it. And it's a crazy long putt. This was a 66-year-old guy playing in St. Andrews. And the first two guys in front of him, the wind was at their back. And they went way over. Par three. So he's like, I'm just going to putt it. And then it went over the hill. Like, I guess there's a little ink. They couldn't see it. And then they couldn't find the ball. And it was in the hole. Wow. Yeah.

How many people have to verify this before it's accepted? Like if you do something miraculous on the golf course. Roundabout. A couple guys walking by. I don't know. I mean, this guy. Well, I don't know about for Guinness, but. Well, there's a video. There's videos now of people putting from tees and the ball goes in the hole. Really? Yeah. They're not super long par threes, but it's like there's now there's like a few videos where someone's done it.

But if Caleb and I came to you and said, I made three hole-in-ones this weekend, I mean, would you? I wouldn't believe you. But would you have to accept it as fact? No, I wouldn't. No, I wouldn't accept it. I don't know what you want me. I wouldn't accept it. I would make y'all go watch y'all swing. I'd go, let me come swing the club real fast. Let me just see it. I'm from Pinehurst. Yeah, that is true. You told me you're from Pinehurst. I'd be like, let me see you swing. I think I made two.

At least. At least two. You made contact with the ball twice? That's what it was. You didn't play ever growing up in Pinehurst? You know, everybody there kind of takes lessons growing up, but never really played. It's very expensive there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not like a hop-on course. Exactly. Yeah. The...

I was only doubting what I was about to say. I forgot what you were talking about. All right. Most movie tickets sold, gone with the wind. Crazy that that still holds up. To adjust it for what ticket prices are now, it brought in $3.4 billion. Oh, wow. Over. Way more than Avatar. Yeah. Really? More than the new Star Wars and stuff, too. Yep. Never. Never.

I was going to say that the local newspaper, the Tennessean here, you can put your name in the paper for a hole-in-one, or at least you used to, but you have to have two witnesses on the hole with you. And it'll list it, so-and-so hit this course, this hole, witnessed by so-and-so and so-and-so. Is that still on there? I think they finally stopped. I was the only one that still really enjoyed reading it. I would always look at it. Occasionally I would know somebody. Yeah, there was – I knew someone on it. There was –

Our, like, legends where I play, they send, I mean, most country clubs or something send emails out. And they'd be like, oh, this person got a hole in one here. But you do have the witness. Yeah. Most Big Macs eaten in one setting. I think we may even mention this. Joy Chestnut ate 32. There's a dude that, like, just eats Big Macs, too.

I saw it on TikTok, I think. Like he's had one a day for like the past 30 years. That's all he eats? Yeah. Well, there was a guy in that documentary, Super Size Me. Oh, yeah. And this guy, that's what he did. Morgan? That's probably what it was. You used to have to watch a whole documentary to get that information. Now you got it in one second. Yeah. That's the thing. Like, I mean.

the only way i knew that is because i had to watch a two-hour documentary yeah and it's funny to be like now you're like no no i was 15 seconds of my life and how you you know the same thing i know yeah for sure is there's a guy that's been eating a lot of big macs every day for his life yeah he's doing fine save so much time yeah i'm glad i did it that way yeah yeah yeah yeah i don't really watch movies there's another tiktok thing where you can watch like the summary of movies yeah

That's all you do. That's all I do. Do you ever binge watch? Yeah. The TikTok? Binge watch TV? Like I'll binge watch shows if they're really good. I know this. 25-year-old guy from Brooklyn. Most binge watch TV hours. He did 94 straight hours binge watching. Watched Bob's Burger, Game of Thrones, Kirby Enthusiasm, Battlestar Galactica, among others. Set the world record. He had hallucinations and neurological side effects afterwards.

But he did it. He probably doesn't even remember Battlestar Galactica. He's like, I don't even. What was it about? He goes, I don't know. Why did I even do it? Yeah. All right. I think that's about it. That's good. Yeah. All right, everybody. Yeah, don't forget Mike Vecchione's special. I'm on tour. My dates are on tour. Caleb Elliott, you go out. Check your website and all that. Yeah, check me out on socials, Caleb Elliott Comedy. You know what I'm saying? There you go.

I'm not sure when this comes out. It should be before April in Salt Lake City. Oh, yeah. Ryan co-headlining Wise Guys. A lot of people have messaged us saying they're getting tickets. It should be fun. Yep. April 15th, 16th. Way to sell it. Should be fun. I mean, that's like Vandy's own. Have fun. Expect to win. You know? Should be fun. All right. As always, we love you. Thank you very much. Bye. Bye.

Nateland is produced by Nateland Productions and by me, Nate Bargetzi, and my wife, Laura, on the All Things Comedy Network. Recording and editing for the show is done by Genovations Media. Thanks for tuning in. Be sure to catch us next week on the Nateland Podcast.