E891 Going Deeper with Bella Thorne
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You're crazy. Do you know horoscopes well? A little bit. Well enough, I think. For the most part. What are you? A Libra. Isn't it? Yay. When's your birthday? October 8th. Okay. September 28th. Oh, nice. Nice. Do you know all your, like, your rising and all that other stuff? I did at one point, and now I think I've forgotten it. Okay.

I know that one of them is like a Taurus. And I was like, oh, that makes sense because my Libra-ness is a bit too chill for how I am personally. Not really as a person. I am quite by the book, you could say, on things. So I was like, oh, that must be it.

I honestly don't even know what they all are. I always hear about the Geminis. I know Libras. I love Geminis. My favorite sign. When is that? Geminis in May. Yeah, are we ready? Can we keep talking about horoscopes? I'm kind of fascinated by it. Bella, welcome to the Volfell. Thank you for having me. It's great to have you. I'm so excited. Where'd you get that sparkle cup? Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, a little something something in here. You know what I mean? A little light vodka. Oh, there we go. Love that. If you need to pop it off, we've got a whole bar. No one ever drinks it. I know, there is a lot of liquor up there. We do a lot of morning interviews, but you know. Yeah. We did have someone come in and like rip shots at like 10 a.m. once. No judgment. Wow. No judgment. That's awesome.

in some ways committed to a cause. It's kind of like seeing people at the airport when you have a super early flight and they're sitting at the bar like with wine and you're like, I mean, I guess, you know, you got to get through it some way. Isn't an airport though different? Isn't it like at any time in a day?

In an airport, I feel like you should be allowed to drink. Yeah, it's like five o'clock somewhere in an airport. Yeah, there's like no rules maybe in an airport, except there's a lot of rules. Yeah. Except, yeah. Except drinking. And time does matter because you do want to make your flight. But I suppose it is like you walk into an airport, you're kind of on vacation. It's a judgment-free zone. Whatever.

whatever so have you been like obviously crazy world these days like yeah yeah I know I've been everything safe yeah wise yes thankfully um yes the house is there and

I was out of town as well filming and my sister and whatnot had to evacuate. And it was so scary being on FaceTime and whatnot with her dealing with that situation. And yeah, when I had come home, I was like, I guess we'll see if it's still there. Yeah, I bet that would have been great to not even be home and just be watching everything happen and not know.

Yeah, and be checking in on everybody constantly, seeing how everyone was doing. Yeah, very weird being on the other side. That is really weird. Yeah. Okay, I am super intrigued by just your life in general. I obviously, I'm 26, so I grew up on Shake It Up. Oh, yay. Love Shake It Up. Was that your first...

ever acting experience or did you do anything before that? Yes. Yeah, I did quite a few things before that. I was on Big Love on HBO and quite a few other shows, some movies, but nothing comedy. So that was my first comedy. I had wondered growing up in my life if I would ever do comedy, if I was even funny in any sort of way. Well, you crushed, clearly. Oh, thank you. Thank you. My sister actually

went over those lines with me for the audition. And so that's like a really fond memory. Yeah, I bet. I feel like... I mean, so how old were you when you first got into acting? Eight. Yeah. Wow. And like...

How did that even happen? Well, I had been modeling since I was born, since I was six weeks old, oddly enough. You were just a perfect child. They were like, this baby's so beautiful. No, actually, I was an ugly baby. My mom never forgets to remind me that I was a very ugly baby. She's like, I don't know how you booked these jobs, but you did. Yeah, I was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around my neck, so I was quite blue when I came out. Yeah, and they had to rush me away.

And then hours later, they brought me back and my mom was like, that one's not mine. And she kept telling them to look at her other previous children and they were all very beautiful babies. My sister even won the beautiful baby award in the hospital. Who does that? I mean, wow.

Oh, since you're this little. Just getting into shame real early. And I had all this like dark hair that later on fell out and became blonde. But she just she was definitely kept telling them that I was I was not the baby. I was not the baby that came out. And they were like, no, this one is yours. She's like, no, not that one. Yeah. Yeah. And then somewhere along the way, I just...

You really, yeah, you really, you really came through. Like as soon as you got that look, mom just rushed you in to the modeling gig. What was your first, I mean, what was your first early memory of modeling? Like, were you doing it all the way through as a young child? Yes. Yeah. All the way through. There was a Target commercial as well. I did commercials as well and then did acting. And

One really fond memory I have is this Target commercial and there was all these butterflies on set and they had such colorful sets and everything matched and it was monochromatic. And it's really such a beautiful commercial. And when I think about the stuff that I like, even in my own house or when it comes to building sets and how much that's in me. And I feel like it came from that moment being so wowed as I think I was 17.

six or seven and I was just so amazed by the color and the sets and it all being matching yeah it's a very very beautiful commercial Target killed it on that one and did you enjoy it all the way through were there ever moments where you're just like I'm overreacting

I'm over this or is it something that you always just kind of. No, not, yeah, not as a child. I think you're stoked. Everything is awesome. And yeah, I think when you start to get a little bit older and you're tired and you're like, oh man, this is a long day. Yeah. So there was no part of you that would have rather been like,

playing with your friends or doing whatever you wanted to. No, I didn't have friends. I was not a, yeah, no. I was also bullied in school when I was there. So they took me out and they took me to Sylvan Learning Center. Then I was diagnosed with dyslexia. And yeah, I was... Nick's also dyslexic, so safe space. Yeah, knock on. Yes. I'm not. You honestly brought awareness to it for me. What the fuck? Sorry, sorry. No.

No, seriously, I know, because you were honestly back, I'm a bit older. So like when I was a kid, you didn't know about dyslexia or talk about dyslexia. And honestly, like if you found out you were dyslexic, you weren't telling people. Like that was something you definitely would have gotten picked on. And it wasn't until I was adult where I was like, why can I not read out loud very well?

I could never figure it out because I was just like, I'm not stupid. So what age did you get diagnosed? Like in my 30s. Yeah. Wow. Was it like somewhat? Yeah, it was. I didn't like it didn't really change anything. I didn't like start. I didn't take any dyslexic courses to help me like read better aloud. Honestly, I don't know if they have those. I don't know if they do. Because like I would love because like a teleprompter is like a nightmare for me. I'm like, slow down, please. Oh, my God.

But it does it like I felt a little seen not to sound corny, but it was just like I'm a big believer in like I don't like to like lean into my weaknesses, so to speak. But I think it's just nice to know what they are. So at least I just like be like, oh, like I don't have to make excuses for anything. I'm just dyslexic now. So it's just it's I don't lead with it. But like, yeah, like now I know why I have no idea. Like.

how many vowels are in a word or like why I have a hard time reading a teleprompter and everyone else makes it look so easy and it looks so hard for me. I still have like a huge fear of reading out loud in front of people and

And when I was doing my book tour and whatnot, it was it was like, no, you were you were doing this like this is something that in my book, there is like a lot of references to dyslexia and whatnot. And I spell things wrong. And then I rewrite it on the typewriter and rewrite it again and keep spelling it wrong. And it was like a nice way to like.

I'm dyslexic. Everybody. Made me feel a lot better about myself, I think. Actually, and also one of my favorite, after I found out, then people were telling me all the very talented, very successful people who are dyslexic. So many. So many. The first book that Nick bought our daughter River was the Dyslexic ABCs. And it was every...

I bought it for myself. It was like Albert Einstein for a, or like, you know, all of the people who have just been so brilliant in this world who are also dyslexic. All for the every letter. Yeah. I want that.

We were at like a kid's store and I like, I bought her for me. I mean, I'll read it to her someday, but I'm like, you know, tell her about dad. Yeah. So you were all, I mean, many people are. Natalie has some horrific bullying stories. I mean, it was the full mean girl scene of like my, I had started modeling at a young age and they took one of my modeling pictures and she wrote sucks for free whore and like,

all over school, like all over Twitter. It was, yeah, it was everywhere. And I'm so sorry. It was a nightmare. But then I quickly left and I'm going to move to New York and model, bitch. Yeah, exactly. Fuck you, whore. Yeah, but it was very traumatic. So I understand that like feeling of being like, let me just get the fuck out of here. How long did you have to deal with that?

For like, I left like Christmas time. So it was the beginning of, so like August to December probably. Oh, I'm so sorry. Every once in a while, Natalie will get like a DM from someone from like back home. And now he'd be like, yep, heard from another bully, you know, because now that like Natalie's out here and. Yeah, I'm sure they've forgotten all about their horrible ways. Got a little bit in the public eye. Oh my God, girl, how are you? Congratulations. Congratulations.

I always loved you. Did you ever hear from any of your high school bullies who decided to forget that they were assholes to you and just remind you, like, oh, we used to go to school and be best friends? No, actually, one of my biggest bullies was my teacher. She really went out of her way to...

bully me in front of classmates, make me get up and read knowing I couldn't, make me stay there. At one point she even threw away a Christmas present that's like, you know when you get those things and it has the mug and it has the little cocoa and stuff. And so our parents got all the teachers different things. And I saw it in the trash when I came back.

From recess. And I'll never forget seeing it just physically in the trash and like not being able to really comprehend that as a child of like, why is it in there? And I just didn't really understand. And when I told my mom when I had gotten home, she was like, she did what? She was so upset. She even went as far as to...

fake my testing to get into the next grade because she wanted to keep me and humiliate me. And my teacher ever reprimanded. Oh yeah. My, uh, principal who had a really, I think a fond liking to me because I was bullied. And sometimes I would have to sit in her room and do things instead of being with the rest of the class, doing things like testing and whatever. So when, when,

My mom got back those results and stuff and she took it to the principal and was like, look at this handwriting stuff does not match. It literally doesn't match. And the principal had me retake the test and I passed with flying colors. This whole bag. So then she was she was put on leave after that. And yeah, I was in college.

Second grade going to third. That is the craziest thing ever. How can an adult just like.

hate a second grader that much. Literally. And I understand that I was often not in school a lot with modeling so young and because I spoke Spanish and that's my first language and with the reading, I don't know what about me made her like hate me or if she just thought it was so funny when I was reading to be crying in front of everybody and to keep making me do it. Like, I don't know where...

I don't know where anybody gets joy out of a child crying and being, you know, a stepping stone in that in any sort of way. No, that's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Why? Why? But I have seen comments before like, oh, I was friends with her in school and I was like, liar!

liar liar I ain't have no friends you're all liars yeah it's uh it's one of my favorite things when Allie reads me these messages from it's also sometimes when like I get hate from people I

I feel like it's a little bit easier for me to be like, fuck you. Because it's like the shit I went through at such a young age, like this does not affect me anymore. Good for you. Maybe you would have. That's a hard feeling to have. It's strength. It is. It is very hard. So I also am very sorry that you went through that. I know that it can be very traumatic. Pull it, sisters.

Yeah. Oh, trauma bonding. Isn't it good? Yeah. It's good to get out. You know, I always love the like, again, like it's always feels good to like rise above the shit that happens to you. And yeah, like sometimes we'll just run into people when we go back home to her house and you know,

the different people who react to natalie it's like especially when they're like oh you made it or whatever it's like um you know it sucks to hear but like like stories when she was picked on but you can definitely like when we run into some people like like one girl when it was in thanksgiving you ran into a girl a girl and she's like oh you really made it and the girl she was with was someone who like bullied you or didn't like and like she kept going and like i don't know it's i'm always proud of you when i see people like uh think like you made it out here or whatever so

I think it's more so just like getting out of your hometown. Yeah. You know, which is sometimes really hard to do. I mean, you're from a small town in Florida, right? When did you personally feel like I have made it? I'm out of this small town. I'm out of the bullying. I'm away from the trauma. Let's see. A month ago, maybe?

Yeah, I'm not sure that some of those feelings will ever go away or that I will ever really feel like I made it. I'm not sure that my want for creative more will ever allow me to feel that way. Yeah, I'm not. I think I'll always still have that kind of feeling inside of me.

I'm not sure when. Don't look like you're going to cry. I don't want you to feel like that forever. Yeah, yeah. I would like to not feel like that forever as well. And I think, you know, at some point probably will not when when something is is so bad.

incredible and I really feel like I've done something really great then then maybe I'll not have that feeling a little bit but yeah I think I always use all those feelings to to drive me um or else they'll just sit they'll just sit there getting negative and stirred and yeah it's always best to to do something with them um put it into something I definitely have a hard time like

any successes I've had with things I've done. I try to work on that. I mean, you've obviously had a very successful career. You've done a lot of amazing things despite like having that feeling. Is there one thing that you've done that you are, you know, really proud of or you're most proud of of all the cool things that you've accomplished? I would say probably reading books

my book out loud at Carnegie Hall. That was a nice one. It was three separate reasons to be proud. One, my dad always loved Carnegie Hall and so to get there and him not be here to see it was like a... And I got to do my poetry about him as well. That's beautiful. And yeah,

Yeah, and I think the reading out loud and having a book that's solely based on mental health and being a bit of a mess and dealing with those feelings on, you know, on the inside and being able to do that, all three of those things was like such a... Yeah, I don't think I'll ever forget...

that feeling. Yeah. I do remember that the person I was dating though at the time decided to pick a fight with me the whole night. Okay. And I was so upset and I ordered like Uber Eats. And I'll never forget that I actually like looked at the street that they were picking up the food at for some reason. And it was Delancey Street, which is my dad's name. So I was like, yes. And also F you boyfriend. You can go suck it. Yeah. Yeah.

So it was nice. It was like my dad's like, don't let anybody dim your shine. You got to hear it. That's a great answer. Yeah. Like to be able to read that aloud. Yeah.

Especially given all the things that you've done. It wasn't an answer I was expecting. It was a cool moment. I also got to read at the White House. Yeah, for kids with disabilities. And that was one of my first times publicly reading. And I was so, so scared and nervous. And I asked my mom how I did when I was done. And she said, you can take a breath. Have...

Because I read the whole, I was so afraid to mess up one word that I read the entire book like this, all like this and the whole entire time. And then I was done. I completely relate to that as a dyslexic person. I feel like I'll just get through as fast as possible. I will not mess up. I will not mess up. How old were you? You're talking about your dad a lot. I know he passed in 2007, right? How old were you when he died? I was nine. Wow.

Wow. And he how did he pass a motorcycle accident? Yes. He was riding the motorcycle. Yes. He had nitrous put on his Ducati, which, as you know, is a great idea for anybody. And they had he had problems with his bike turning off and he took it back to the shop.

And I remember my mom and dad arguing about this bike in general. My mom always saying like, you're going to kill yourself one day using that bike. Like she was so upset when he got it and it was turning off. So they put it back in the shop and the shop let it out earlier than it was supposed to. And that first time he rode it, it just stopped and he spun out.

And then they airlifted him. And by the time they got him on the table, per se, because he had so many broken bones, his heart gave out on him and then he had a heart attack. So technically he died of a heart attack, but it was because of too much pressure.

Yeah. So that was shitty. And then our grandma died like two months later. And that was like, you know, my mom's mom. That's like, you know, the one who really raised her. And that just, oof, that was a double, a double whammy for the family for sure. How, what was that conversation like when they...

I assume your mom told you about your dad? Oh, well, we just heard we were supposed to go to the beach that morning. My dad was also supposed to come up in the next few days, finally, to L.A. and kind of close out his house there and actually move here with us. So that was also weird timing.

And I remember in my bunk bed hearing my mother screams, screams, screams, screams. And I walked out and she was against the wall and she fell to the floor and she's on the phone and she's just screaming bloody murder like a baby.

like an animal being slaughtered is what it sounds like. I'll never forget those screams. And she didn't believe them as well. She was like, you're lying to me because his phone was off and they turned it on and all the text messages come through. So she's like, I just got texts from him like literally 15 minutes ago. So it has to be wrong. And that also like messed with her brain. And then it took

you know, for then somebody to come to the door. So in that whole time, she was in complete disbelief. It's just not possible. He's just texted me. You have it wrong. And then when the police came to the door, yeah, then that was another... Yeah. It's like the...

initial heartbreak and then the like wait no there's hope it's just not possible and then the heartbreak again to follow yeah it'd be hard yeah I think my mom knew in her soul though with those blood curdling screams it was like her heart had been ripped out and we

We didn't have enough money to go down to see him, to cremate him, essentially, and whatnot. So that was also a dark time as well because we couldn't be there. We were actually given to our friends, the Webbers, funny enough,

Who ended up on The Bachelor. Wait, Peter Weber? Yeah. What? Yeah, Peter Weber. Yeah, Jack and Peter. And they became like our solace for that like week while my mom went down and dealt with the, you know,

passing stuff and then she came down and the house was broken into everything was gone stolen like oh my mom just got it again and again and again and then yeah the only way that we even

were able to, I think, fully understands when she came back, she had photos of him on the metal slab. And she showed us those photos on the BlackBerry. Wow. Yeah. Never forget them photos either. Yeah, that sounds scarring. And I remember we were arguing, my siblings and I were arguing, and my mom, she was just like...

you want something to argue about? Look at this. And it was so much pain in that time. Like, do you feel like your mom had like anyone she could go to? It was just y'all. No one. Yeah. Um, and I think my mom has always felt that way in her life. You know, we don't have much family and my father's side is Jehovah witness and they like disowned him. Um,

So they wouldn't even come to the cremation. And I know that hurt my mom a lot, not being able to have any side of his family. Yeah, I bet. Yeah. Did you get a chance to say goodbye to your dad? No. No, no. We hadn't seen him in months at that point. Yeah. He was just coming back. So that was...

Yeah. How have your family been able to heal over the years? Or if I'm assuming they have. Yeah. I don't know that we ever really fully, you know, will heal.

totally healed but we try to honor his memory you know on his birthday we'll write things on a balloon and then send them up and I think we all try in our own little ways I made my jewelry because he always wanted a thorn empire and that was and he never got to see that or us do any of that so that's why I call it thorn dynasty because hopefully one day he'll you know get to see that and be like

Fuck yeah. Like you better get it. So yeah, it's all like designed after Florida and family and my dad. Thank you. So I feel like he is. I mean, I feel like he's

along, I mean, clearly he's like along the way the whole time, you know, it's like he was there in Carnegie Hall, you know, like I feel like he's been in your back pocket this whole time since he passed, you know? Yeah. So it's really special that you get to like live on some, like his dream. Yeah, exactly. So special. And, you know,

keep that for generations to come. You know, when I have children and whatnot, obviously they'll never get to meet their grandpa. So I think having that, I got a fucking painting of, of a family photo of us hanging like right when you walk into my house and it's fucking big and these amazing artists did it for me. And like, they recaptured his smile so much. So I'm definitely like not letting him die again in any sort of way. Yeah.

That's so special. Well, I know it's obviously not easy to share, but thank you for opening up about that. I feel like I fucked up my makeup. You didn't. You're beautiful. But I used a primer, so. Yeah. This primer better come through for me right now.

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Yeah. I mean, thank you for sharing and opening up about that. And, you know, I was just curious too, obviously we're very excited to just be sitting here with you and talking with you and having you open up with us, but like, you're also not someone who does this a lot and gives a lot of interviews. And, you know, I was just kind of curious, like why now in terms of, you know, kind of your willingness to share a little bit more about yourself and open up and, you

And, you know, we are very appreciative of that and excited to keep talking to you. But, you know, I think it's not lost with a lot of your fans, just how much you cherish your privacy and are reluctant to open up and share things like that. That's a great question. I think I have been an open book since I was 18 for so long and it felt really mean and

and kind of evil when people would use those things against me and blame me for them. I've, you know, even when I had a face full of acne and I wouldn't wear makeup and I was popping it on Snapchat and, you know, kind of going through the whole process and really trying to like be open about

about who I was, it was always like, oh, she has to be on heroin because look at her skin. It's so bad. Like, will she, you know, wash her face? She should try soap kind of things. And like actual like articles writing that, not even just comments, like articles writing that kind of language. And

When I, you know, came out about being molested growing up, I think that was another thing that really hurt when people used it against me to almost speak badly on my character of who I am now as a woman because this thing had happened to me. And when I had to put out my own nudes because I was being fucking threatened and then, you know, Whoopi Goldberg and said that I had

essentially kind of deserved it in some way because I had sent the photo in the first place that I had even taken the photo and she like flat out said it was your fault yeah and I obviously got very upset because that was such a hard thing for me to do and I remember I was

on my book tour and I was about to do an interview and I was reading those texts and I literally asked my manager, I was like, what the fuck do I do here? And I was like, like at this point, like it's just so embarrassing. He's going to take it from me. He's going to take these parts of my body and somebody's already done this once to me. So I don't want them to do that again.

And so then it was like, well, if I do it, then it's my decision and it's not yours, even though it kind of still is your decision because I'm only doing it because of you. And so but at least it's mine. It's my stamp on it. And people saying that I like was faking that to put it to head to get attention, that I just wanted to like put out my body in that way and and do this and fake this thing. And that.

fucking hurt again. I was just like, like, these are really personal, seriously, deeply rooted, like issues and things I've gone through. And to have it thrown up in your face so much of like, you deserve it. And this is what you are. And you're that kind of woman. That's what you deserve. All of this was so hard at like fucking 2019.

19 to like mentally go through and I think some people think I'm like still the old me like the crazy rebellious Bella and you're like are you not fucking like are you fucking what what is happening here do you not see what I was going through at those times what other way would any normal person react like um I'm still a teenager in some ways and it was just really yeah it

shitty. And so I felt like I could not be honest anymore. Why would I be honest with you when all you do is throw it back in my face and blame me for it and call me disgusting for it? Thank God I also got to work with the FBI and put this son of a bitch away. And he did go away. And now he's sitting in there for like eight years. So and he did it to all these other people as well. So

When the FBI saw that post, they immediately reached out and was like, this is the same exact language. We know this guy has done it before and we have these other things and worked with me to like put him away. I had to write the statements as well for the judge. And I had to re go through that process again to write those statements. And in my heart, when they asked me to write it, I was like,

Is this going to come out? And they were like, well, what do you mean? I was like, what if people post this statement? Like, again, they're going to take my words and how I feel and what this man took from me. And they're going to they're going to like fiend off of that. And that's fucking disgusting. So that was like so scary. And I just I think I just decided, no, I'm not doing this anymore. I'm not giving y'all nothing. When you act like that, why?

Should I? And yeah, so I think I was just like, nope. And now like, I don't I don't want to not be myself, because that's only doing myself a disservice. And then everything that I go against, they've won. So it's like, either way, I feel like sometimes I'm in a lose lose battle. I'm sure this interview will be even thrown up in my face like,

oh, well, she and this and oh, crocodile tears or oh, she deserved it. Oh, she's too sexual. Look at her. Like, you know, just it's like it's just so shitty to hear every day all the time, I think. So I've been like, I'll just not speak. But I don't think it's fair to teach people not to speak because you're afraid of speaking and getting ridiculed. That doesn't seem like a win. We're we're releasing an episode by the time this comes out.

And we're a little nervous about it. Natalie had a miscarriage a couple weeks. Yeah. But I, you know, just hearing you speak, you know, it's like, it's, um, you know,

Yeah, it was tough, but like, we didn't know what to do is like, we wanted to share our experience. We can't, we do this for a living and it was kind of like therapeutic for us just to, you know, we're just going to talk about it. And, uh, and when, you know, we decided to put it out there knowing that like, you know, our intention obviously was one, we wanted to memorialize our child and like, you know, hearing you talk about your dad, like you don't want to

forget, you know, and like when you don't have a chance to meet your baby, it's harder to connect, you know, as a dad and

it's even harder. And so, you know, and obviously we, you know, we, we've heard a lot of stories about it. And then, so we wanted to share knowing that like a lot of people, you know, it's like, they feel very alone when it happens because no one really, you know, everyone's like, sorry, it happened. But like, Oh, anyways, like, you know, it's like an awkward thing. It's like, they don't really relate to it, but you know, we know I'm offline, you know, because like, I don't really give a shit what people say and I've gotten much better. And like, when I'm curious, I wanted to ask you is because you're right. Like,

The internet's an asshole. People are assholes. Hurt people hurt people. You've heard that phrase. And that's just never going to go away. All we can do as humans or people or just anyone in the public eye or just, hell, anyone who's like, has a phone, you know, is like, get better at just like,

removing yourself and not listening to the noise and the disruption and just feeling good about like whatever it is you put out. And I'm curious, like, have you gotten better at that? Just like, you know, feeling good about whatever it is you're putting out there as a creator, as an artist,

and just say, you know, fuck it. Like your opinions, whoever you are, just it's none of my goddamn business because like, you know, they're always going to be assholes. Yeah. Yeah. Well, on the creative side, yes. I'm about to go direct a movie that I wrote that's based on a true story. It's so important. I've put, you know, blood, sweat and tears and so has everybody else. And that I'm

I think is like one of the things that I'll first really be so happy about. And on the other side, man, I just decided to escape social media on the Instagrams in the Twitters. I was like, look, all these little tweets. At some point you can't read your own shit because you're like, oh, I'm going to see one thing. And instead of focusing on all the amazing comments, you're going to focus on this one thing. And if they really poked you somewhere where you were sensitive, boom, they've got you for the rest of the day. And somebody that I don't even

know is offending me. The audacity is how I feel. So I liked when Instagram was when it first started and you would post a photo of your foot and like your random food and like weird selfie. And it became this, my resume, my resume, my resume. Here's how, whatever you think of me, here it is.

Right here. What do you think of me? Judge me now and move on to the next person to judge them and then go. Same thing. It just keeps on going and

I'm just so over it. I'm quirky. I'm ridiculous. I think I also stopped being myself in interviews and in social media as well. I'm quite a quirky person. I do a lot of different voices. I like hop in and out. I'm very sarcastic. And I think a part of me kind of like that part of me kind of died. And people were wondering, like, where is that?

part. Is that, was that still you? And I would always get judged for it. Like, oh, she crazy. Like, and that kind of stuff. When you're just a silly person, people like scrolling like this, like, oh, she looks bad. Oh, I didn't like that. Like, why'd you do that? Like, that's not, I don't care to engage with those people anymore because I'm so sick of asking for you to like me. So I'm so sick of that. I'm not going to do it anymore. And that's why I think

That's great. I mean, that's the best you can do. I like was kind of the same way you were of just like, why am I allowing strangers to like comment under my post of my family, of my life? Like, why would I do? So I have had on the like restrictions of just

people that I allow to, like, comment stuff because it's like, why would I give this random fucking person the, like, opportunity to put their opinion? Exactly. You're not in high school anymore. Yeah. It's like, I don't have to read that shit. You don't deserve the right to comment under my shit. Like, go get a fucking life. But I want to, like, going back to all of these things that you had to endure in your life, I think we have a very similar childhood, you know, and I...

Went through a lot of similar things that you did. And I think when you go through that at a really young age, you have a weird relationship with your body. And so I think that is probably why.

like the extra sting of this boyfriend at the time trying to like release all of these nudes of you no not a boyfriend an actual like uh what's it called um oh a hacker yes not a boyfriend no a hacker this

Someone hacked into your shit. Oh, I didn't even know that. Oh, that's fucking crazy. That's fucking crazy. But I just want to say like you sharing that side of you. I know you see like the people being like you just the terrible things that people say. But when I tell you like sitting beside you as someone who went through something similar to hear that, like,

I'm not alone. I didn't go through it alone. I don't have to go through it alone. That people like you will talk about your experience and you will see like you on the other side of things is

is so inspirational and it's like something for us to hold on to and to be like, there's hope, you know, like I won't be this person who's stuck in my 10 year old body and reliving things that happened to me over and over again. You know, like look at this person. This person is beautiful, successful, creative, like, and, and I think you're giving people hope and light. And I just want to like, thank you for being so open and honest about the things that you've been through because it's not easy. And like,

It's a very alone feeling. And I'm so sorry you went through all of that. And I think that surviving it is like, you know, people would say all the time like, oh, well, you were like this victim of sexual assault. And it's like, yeah, I definitely was a victim, but like I fucking survived it. And like I'm here and it's like it's made me this resilient, strong fucking person. And like now I wouldn't let a man like...

I feel like that gave like going through that gave me the strength to be like, fuck you and fuck off. And like, I'm not this like naive little girl anymore who just like trusted anyone and everyone, you know, I feel like it just really gave me that strength. And you being able to talk about it is just like, I think it's giving people more hope than anything.

tearing people, you know, like the people who want to tear you down. Well, thank you so much for that. I was going to say the same to you for what happened to you guys and that you're being so brave and sharing it. And I think that that is going to help so many people and especially in the political climate that we're in is so important to share your piece and your journey with it. And I think that that will be

really heartwarming for a lot of people that have been through it and will feel like, thank God. I hope somebody is making. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's a fucking alone feeling to go through the things that we, you know, have gone through. And so it is, I think to like hear other people talk about their experiences, because it's not something you want to talk about. You know, you don't want to go publicly and you don't want to like,

the people in my life who had no idea. It's like now they do. And now that's like, you know, I didn't I didn't ever want all these people to know that about my life. But like, I know that me talking about this miscarriage, it's like I know that there's so many women who go through that who are like,

what the fuck like am I the only part you know and they want something to connect to and so I think like all of us being able to just talk about vulnerabilities and the stuff that we go through in life is really important so I'm just like really proud of you did you ever get a sincere apology from Whoopi um I think I'll next that question yeah

There was a video sent from backstage. Yes, there was a video sent. Oh. Yes. Like a cameo. Interesting. Okay.

Right. Like, and the next question. You're engaged. How's that going? That's a weird transition. You're engaged. No, but obviously we love talking about relationships and love and, you know.

shit, I've, I got so many exes and stories and things like that. But like, you know, it all came to like me being able to meet my wife, you know, all the, all the crazy, you know, heartbreaks and stories. And some of it has been on TV and some of it's not, but you know, you're very happily engaged now. And like, how do you feel like what you have with your fiance? How has that shaped you? And what do you love best about your relationship with him? One of the things I love best is that we're always very,

quite silly with one another and that we're always able to make kind of a dark joke out of a dark situation that we might be in in life, you know? And I think that we really connect in our humor and in our silliness. I also love the way that he takes care of me. I always feel very safe. And that's a really hard thing

thing, I think, for anybody to feel, especially women. It's very, it's like everywhere you look, there's just...

murder everywhere. And it's it and and not that your partner has to give that to you because that's a very hard thing to give. You can't just make somebody feel safe. Like it's it's not just about what you're doing and what you're saying. It's about everything all at the same time. And yeah, I don't think I've ever felt safe with with anybody that I've been with. Actually, I felt more times that I had to make them feel safe in

in some situations and that, not great. So I really love that he's able to do that quite effortlessly with me. I love that you say that. I mean, Nan and I say that to each other all the time. And I think clearly it's, I think what I've learned from my wife and my audience that safety is,

probably the number one thing women are looking for. It's also, I think something men really appreciate too, that they don't talk about too. It's just like, you know, when you, I mean, what is a serious relationship or a marriage, you know, an engagement, if not to like have someone in your life that you can actually truly be yourself and be safe and be that vulnerable person.

And I think, yeah, when I was younger, like I would have been in love and I had great girlfriends, but like, I was like, I don't know, you know, it's like, you know, at times I felt loved, but like, I also felt like we competed, you know, I felt like we were at each other's throats, you know, I felt judged, you know, or I felt like ashamed to say something or do something. And yeah, it's, it's, it's nice to be able to find someone where, you know, you can open up and you can make each other feel safe. And like you said, it's, it's not something that comes very easily and that's something that happens.

happens over time and it doesn't mean you don't have ups and downs and work through your own shit but like there's a I think with Natalie and I you know I'm curious what if this is something that you relate to but like I feel like we both like give a shit about our relationship like we wake up every day and like I feel her effort to make us work as much as I feel like I'm putting in the effort you know

And I think that's a very unique feeling in a relationship that a lot of people just kind of take for granted. Like when you're younger, it was just more like, oh my God, like we're made for each other. And like you meet in the first month. Awesome. And you like plan out your next 10 years of your life. And then like you just like start dating and hating each other. But like, yeah, we're very, you know, like when we feel a disconnect, like we're very quick to like someone points that out, you know, and that's something that I've never had in a relationship. Yeah.

And again, it doesn't mean when you do it like that, you don't let it get out of hand for too long. And you know, listen, more built up feelings and explode. And like every relationship, you know, we have our shit, you know, we work through shit. Did you see that thing going around on Instagram? That's like, you know, you're in a really great relationship. If you're able to fart in front of your partner, do you guys fart in front of each other? Nick definitely does. I don't. I never, never. Somehow not allowed.

allowed to fart for some reason. She's lying. I've never farted. I've never admitted to farting. He doesn't. He never admits to it. It's always like, what? Huh? What happened? You know, he will never admit to it. He also, he's just like not a fan of bathroom talk, you know, like he's not. It's a me thing. Yeah. He's like, I know everyone boobs. I understand. I'm not trying to pretend that doesn't happen, but we don't have to embrace it. Like some people really

Do you and Mark share, like, do you have toilets that sit in front of each other? And like you both? Like my Meghan Trainor. Oh my God. We have one toilet that we both use when the other person's not in the room. I am quite bathroom shy and I put on the tap.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Or I mostly play music out of my phone, so I'll always bring my phone and I just start blasting rap music. And I think then he knows it's time. Maybe don't enter the room. Yeah, I like that. See?

It's like you know, but you don't need to announce it. You don't need this, right? You don't need to know. Yeah. You can just know subconsciously, but you don't need to go there. Yeah. Yeah. I like that.

you're like that's my speed so we think the instagram study's wrong then it's gotta be i feel like it's more who was talking about this maybe it was like i saw a clip of alex earl talking about how she was like he we don't even like pee in front of each other that's crazy because like it will kill the sex no that's

That's crazy. Like, we won't be, if you know. Or we'll make the sex more okay. Or just, yeah, we're left and right. Yeah, so I was like, well, that's extreme. But that's also, you know, I don't know. Maybe some people feel it will kill the sex drive. What do you mean not in front of each other? Like, as in they have to leave the entirety of the bathroom if you are going to the bathroom? Like, what are you doing if you're in a hotel?

You know, it's like, go down to the lobby, have to pee. Right. Is that what they, is that what she means? I guess. I think so. Oh, come on. Every time. Yeah. I would get a block of affection. If that's true. Yeah, I got a UTI. He's so.

You know, like when you're a kid, you know, it's like, oh, go pee in the woods or something. It's not a big deal. Like no kid is like taking a shit. I don't know that we were peeing in the woods. That wasn't the go-to. I'm quite still scared when it comes to camping and whatnot to pee. I have this phobia that a spider or a snake will come up and hurt me down there.

And hurt me bad. No, that's a fear. And forever scar me for the rest of my life. That is for sure scary. Do you camp? Yes, yes. I have done quite a bit of camping. Yeah, yeah. Do you have the shiwi? The what? Shiwi. The hoo-ha? It's like you can stand up and pee, I believe, for women. Give me an image. Shiwi images. No.

It's a funnel. Shee-wee. Oh, I'm kind of digging that. Right? No spiders climbing up your hoo-ha. Is that for camping? Yeah. That's wild. Isn't that crazy? But then, so then when...

what's the next step? After that step happens, what's the next step when you still have the shiwi? No, it's a funnel. So it comes out like a mint. But then it's still, right, it's still contaminated. Do you clean it? How do you clean it? Urine. Oh. You're in the woods. You got the shiwi. It's done. I feel like you stick it in the ground, right? Oh! And you would just pick it up if you need it again. Am I right? Like a little stake in the ground. Wash it when you leave? And then when you leave, you wash it. I mean, you are camping. You're going to get dirty. But then like,

oh I guess the dirt's not technically near the I just don't like dirt anywhere in any you know um near any sort of circumstance how do you feel about how do you feel about sand are you the same with sand oh yeah you don't sand in the in the charcuterie is not cool the charcuterie board yes sand in the charcuterie is not chill

Absolutely. You wouldn't eat charcuterie with Sarah, now would you? No, I would not. But I.

Brooke Lennon.

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On this show, my audience is fascinated with alternative relationships. Is this a rumor? Is it true? Were you and Tana in a throuple or was that just a rumor? No.

No, no, we were not in a, in a throuple. Okay. No, no, we were definitely dating and then she would be dating other people and I was dating a person at that time. And. So it's open. Yeah. Yeah. Open. I would say. Yeah. Okay. Okay.

Well, that's also our thing. But we all did hang out together. And I think that freaked people out that it wasn't like, oh, you brought around this person, this other person you're dating. No, we're all hanging out together in the studio together, doing whatever together. And I think that made people go, oh. That's like a mini open. The guy that I was dating at that time, then he ran with it and wanted to be, he publicly ran with it and wanted to, oh, I got these two baddies.

It just sounds like a guy who's in two different situationships with two girls and you all are chill about it. No, yeah. She had different... Yeah. I had mostly dated just one person, but I think she dated another girl and then men. Yeah, I think everybody was having fun. We were at a having fun time. Hookup culture. In your 18, 19 years when you're just experiencing everything and everything is alive and...

and yeah. Ooh, glad I'm not back there again. Uh, I have you and Mark set a date. We have not set a date. Um, we, we are making our first baby, our movie baby. And, and, um,

Yes. Once we are done with that and through editing. So everything, because that's just not a moment you rush, you know, and it's not, it's not a moment to be, it's already going to be stressful. And I'm already quite by the book on things, being on time, doing things, being, you know. And so I will be a bright dilla. I know myself and I will definitely be like, I swear to God.

Are you thinking big wedding, small wedding, a lope? Like you think you're going to go fairly big? Well, when, because we already have a wedding planner and whatnot and we have the venue. So I think when we had gone through that process and I saw Mark's guest list, it was, you know, he's, he's quite a bit older than me. So he's made, he's had more time to make more friends. Yeah. How old is he? He is 43.

How old are you? Yeah, 27. Oh my God. Oh, we beat you guys. Oh, yes. By one year, one and a half years. Oh, that's awesome. We got to do it so

We got to do a double date. We can talk about movies we watched when we were growing up. It'll be great. Yes, yes. We can talk about how young and hot we are. We can talk about their 80s, 1980s movies and stuff. Yeah, there are. The unfortunate thing with the older movies is that even though the movie itself is remastered, their trailers aren't remastered.

And so every time we're watching the trailer and I'll have Mark in my ear, but it's going to be much better than this, babe, because it's not going to be like this. You know, it's not. I'm like, okay, because I can barely see the screen at this point. It's so blurry and grainy. I made her watch Far and Away the other day with Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. I thought she'd like it. You haven't seen it? It was awful. I'm shocked you didn't like it. What was that other movie you made me watch? The dad? Oh, Meet Joe Black. I love that movie. She hates it. Meet Joe Black?

Have you seen Mulholland Drive? No. You haven't seen it either? Oh, okay. Okay, okay. Yeah, that's a fun one. Really takes you on a rollercoaster ride. You hated it. No, no. I love David Lynch. And actually, I love the same tones he loves. I love the same cameras, the dissolves. There's so much that I have already naturally so loved and seeing it in his work, I'm like, oh, wow.

Because I'm a big David Lynch fan. I love him. And R.I.P. So sad that he just passed away. Yeah. Like, other than movies, are you guys, do you watch any reality TV? Oh, yeah. I finally got him on The Real Housewives of Potomac. Oh, yeah. See, we haven't gotten into that one. We're, like, stuck on Salt Lake City as our...

Are you caught up? Yeah. Oh my God, yeah. What about the next reunion? I mean, the ladies are going at each other. Where do you stand on Lisa Barlow? Are you a Lisa girl or are you like a Broadway and Whitney girl? Ooh, well, I'm loving the tequila company. We'll start with that. Not that I drink tequila, but get it, girl. And...

I think sometimes Lisa doesn't have, well, we all know she doesn't like to say sorry. And, um, that just can. Yeah. I think that that just comes back and, and bites her in, in the Bronwyn situation. I can imagine that that's incredibly difficult. What, what they're going through, um, her family with Gwen and my heart really goes out and,

And I think that any way to deal with that situation besides, I love you, I'm sorry, I'm here for you, I'm sorry, I love you, I'm sorry, I'm here for you. Any other wording besides that is crazy. I think it's just unhelpful. Even if you're trying to be helpful, it's not helpful. You cannot...

hear these things because it's so it's it's such a painful sacred place to be commenting on it's like what i love and hate about housewives at the same time is like so many of the biggest fights can just be handled exactly how you describe which is like

not my best moment. I definitely didn't mean it that way. I'm sorry. Yeah, exactly. And like, instead it's like every fucking other excuse in the book. Like, well, a blogger fucking told me that you did this. And like, I would, you know, it'd be boring. I love the way she speaks. I love her accent. I think it's really funny. And yeah,

You should ask Mary on our team. I like that sometimes she's just like, I am done with this. When Meredith loses her mind, it's the best because it's like she might pop. And I love Mary. I've become very fond of Mary. I wasn't so sure. And with her opening up and whatnot, I very much appreciated that as a viewer. Yes, I thought. Angie Kaye?

Love NGK. Love NGK. She's iconic. I'm obsessed with her. She's just iconic. Everything she's... High body count hair was like... I mean, that was the craziest...

Yeah, I've ever heard in my life. Yeah, they were good Yeah, what I mean when you go back and forth with somebody I mean I really do feel that the other woman in my personal opinion did start it she 100% did she showed up a hundred percent so it's like oh And she wouldn't dish it out if you can't take it will not admit to anything She will not like if she would just be like yeah, I did say that my bad. Oh

But then Bronwyn had to be like, you did, Brittany. You said it to me, Brittany. Thank you, Bronwyn, for saying what happened there. Do you think Brittany deserves a snowflake? Let's see. I'm not sure we really got to know Brittany so much this season.

I think we got to know more about her relationship. Yeah, but she's so... She gives the drama. You think she keeps the drama? Really? I will be very sad if she has a lesser role next season. Oh, yeah. I would be sad, too. I want them to make her... So that we can actually get to know her. Yeah. Because the what about me's are so good at the tables. And the, like, I have an announcement. The I have an announcement stuff is very... I finally need to be honest. You guys...

We had sex. When they did the mean text. Okay, but how about Lisa and Meredith both didn't have to do any mean text. They both coincidentally left the table right before they had to. Lisa pretended, lied about her worst thing ever. And then Meredith, being the lawyer that she is, like faked, got up and stormed off. Like, none of this is okay. But what about when Brittany was like, okay, I have one. Yeah.

And hers was like so... I'd rather invite Bronwyn over Mary for tea or something. Mary was like, I agree. You should invite Bronwyn over me. And I love Mary and Angie Kay's relationship that they have developed. I think that that is like a very sacred and...

I feel like a lot of pain from Mary's past. And to see her immediately go at Angie for feeling like for a moment that this wasn't going to be the friendship she thought. And I love that they two did work through it and immediately, you know, the hand-holding and the tears. I think Mary is so real. I think Whitney's real. I think Angie Kay's real. And I think sometimes Lisa, like, great TV. I would very much miss her if for some reason she left. But, like, I would love her to be more...

You can't, you can be wrong. We're all wrong. We're all human. We all make mistakes. You can say something you shouldn't have said, done something you shouldn't have done. Like it is literally just us. It's what we're, it's our makeup, you know, it's inherent. So you can say sorry and be done with it. Totally. Thank you.

They seem to struggle. You have to watch Potomac. You need to watch Potomac. It's so good. You're one of many people who have told us that. Is it almost over? Where are we at? It's already ended. This is Karen Huger, the grand dame who got arrested for the UI. Yes, but she's in rehab now. She's in rehab now, yeah. But she was found guilty. So maybe we'll pick up next season. But wait, are you saying it's done as in they've canceled the show? No, no, no, no, for the season. Oh, thank God.

Have they done Reunion? You're one of many people. I'm on season seven or eight, so I only have that one nine, and then I'm done. I was about to be so upset if you told me that it was actually done done. You're one of many people who have said we need to start watching Potomac. It might still be here. And why haven't you done it yet? Okay. We have a long list of shows we're watching. We recap so many shows. We have every intention of getting this show. What about Temptation Island? Oh my God, we have not. We haven't done that. Dive what? What? Okay.

Okay, so they take real relationships that they've been in. Everybody's at some type of crossroads. And these people are together a long time. And they come to this island and they separate them in a house of singles. And then each week at a luxurious bonfire in the middle of

the woods they do a like 30 seconds that you can see your other partner what he's or she is doing on that part of the island you get 30 seconds and they tell you we're not explaining before this clip or after

It's crazy. One person, he had a fool on threesome. I think it's in the first season and he cheated on her with a fool on threesome in the shower. She had to watch it. I was like, this is mental warfare. Like this is so upsetting that you actually had to physically watch somebody you've been with nine years do that to you. I was like, this is horrible. And I'm hooked. Yeah.

Then give me more. Because like Temptation Island season one was like when I was in college and it's the same host. Yeah. Yeah. He's so funny. And they brought him. And they brought it. Yeah. Mark. What's his name? He has a fame. Like it sounds like somebody. It's like Mark Wahlberg. He's Mark Wahlberg. No, I think it actually is Mark Wahlberg. Yeah, it is. His name is Mark. And every time I see it, Mark Wahlberg. It's Mark Wahlberg, but not Mark. No, it's Mark Wahlberg. Yeah.

It's Mark Wahlberg. Why hasn't it like, yeah, we haven't got it. It hasn't gotten me. What's it on? CW? No, no, it is frisky. You want to see frisky? Oh my God. Have you seen baddies? No. Baddies, baddies, baddies.

batty shot o'clock come on guys you just need to come back and recap with us sometimes yes i know i think we should start a a group text with with us for with mark as well and that we should constantly be putting just like the only thing that the group text is for is just movies and tv recommendations so is he into reality tv with you like have you gotten him to sit down into potomac okay

He didn't like the other ones. In fact, I think they a little bit drove him crazy and he would sit through two. But once you get to six in a night, I think that he his brain, it can it can no longer. The baddies, though, he will watch some episodes. It's a lot of yelling. Is it like bad girls club?

Natalie Nunn took the idea of Bad Girls Club and made her own baddies with Zeus Network, Lemmy Plummer. And it's good for him making this network pop off. It's just like, it's so hard to do this in general. And he did it. So good for you. Good for everybody that was involved. I think Ray J, actually King Bach, who I'm friends with, was also involved in the earlier part of Zeus. And...

Yeah, she went and she, she a CEO, she a queen. No, seriously, she is actually a full on baddie. I love Tinker Bella. When you do watch it, if you go to the Caribbean season, she's introduced and she's a baddie. I mean, everybody, they are standing on business and, you know, and I love that term. I love it.

I love that term. Like it's kind of, I think another way in my opinion of saying like, I'm a man of my word. I don't personally love that term. Yeah. So I love standing on business. Like if you mean what you say and stand on it, stick to it, like do not be flip flopping.

over and around like a fucking fish it's not cool um so yeah i dig that that's my real obsession and yesterday i waited up all night and they put that episode on and then you clicked it and the episode was gone and i stalked every instagram i stalked everybody's instagram to see and everybody was also losing their minds all the comments were losing their minds where is the new episode how could you do this i checked today and it's back girl thank god it's back

I was told there's a story about three rings or three engagement rings. Is that my? Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. What is the one that is about to knock me the fuck out currently on your finger? Which one is that? This is the final one. Okay. Yes, yes. I thought I crushed it. You,

You did crush it. Are you kidding? Look at that chunky bad boy. Sorry. Yeah, no. Cute. Beautiful. Sidekick. That's beautiful. Thank you so much. The original one that he got me, I loved it, but he, I guess, knows me so well that somewhere deep, deep, deep, deep down in there somewhere.

some part of me was like this isn't for me but i loved it and he was like no we're gonna change it and i was like no don't change it it's the one you picked like what and he was like no no i know you don't like it and i was like i'm telling you i love it baby he's like i know i saw your face i saw it in your eyes and we're changing it and then the next one wasn't right as well so he just kind of kept having me try rings on for like three weeks um and uh

And yeah, then we got this one. What was your face when you saw that one? Yeah, well, it was a version of this, but all the way to the finger. And I love Tiffany's martini glass. I think that's super beautiful. And I...

I wanted to double Tiffany's martini glass. So this is a double martini glass that sits on, that the stone sits on. So that's why it's like so high above. I love seeing that space, which is so cool. It's such a cool design, right? Hey, I can see you through it. But, you know, it gets a lot more dirty because you have so much space of oil.

Like lotions and stuff. Yeah, I never take it off. So, like, I never take it off. Only maybe, like, I'm playing a role, obviously, but... You sleep in it? Oh, of course. You shower in it? Uh-huh.

Oh yeah. And then I popped out of stone and now because, which I'm getting fixed and when I'm showering, I'm like ripping my face up because it's like rough, but I refuse still to take it off. I'm that kind of girl who is just like, even when you know you could make something easier on yourself, but you're too lazy to change it. Like you're like, no, I'm still going to do this. That's me. Love that about you.

What do you think's next for you and Mark and your future? And I guess what are your... It sounds so like an interview question, like you're interviewing for a job. But how do you see life unfolding for you in the next kind of chapter of your life? Hopefully happiness. Let's start with that. Always happiness. And...

getting closer, really learning more about each other and whatnot and each other's families. I'm a very family orientated person, so it's very important to me and definitely win the time as well that we might have a family. I think it's really important to get that a bit more of a stable ground, you could say. And yeah, we're doing our first movie together. We've

raised all the finance together. And we've really, I would say like, usually I think a huge testament is working together. I would like to, as I said, my father say a Thorne empire one day. And if I'm going to have a partner and especially for life, I want a partner that I can really work with because I love working. And it's one of the

things that make me the literal happiness in life. And so getting through this process with them and never not once, knock on wood, wanting to rip each other's hair out, I think has been such a beautiful experience.

There's been so many times where, you know, in the movie industry and you sign a contract and then this and that, and then that falls through and this thing and this thing. And you're, you're on this emotional rollercoaster. And I would say over the last year of making this movie and we shoot it coming up. So I'm talking about making it in the other sense of getting it together. Um, there's been so many tears. There's been a lot of moments where I just was like, um,

you know, why, why, why, why? And this is so important to me and it's become so important to him. And that's, that's so beautiful that he's like taking that on with me because he didn't have to, you know, he, he's a producer. Yes. But, you know, this is like a very specific thing. And I think it's just so

endearing and it brought us really close. I mean, I started this show long before I met and when I met her, she was a surgical technician and I never envisioned like being able to work with her. But like now that we are, it's like it really is like, you know, it's like

you feel like very lucky. You feel more like a team and like, you know, like you said, knock on wood, but like we hopefully do a good job or of not getting sick of each other, even though we spend all our time together. But like, yeah, it really helps you feel more connected and to like,

She's always the first person I go to if I want to run something by an idea by her and just to know it's like her. It's just a great feeling. And I think very few couples are, even very few happy couples and successful couples aren't able to be able to work with their partner like you and Mark and like I get to do with Natalie. And I feel very lucky and I can hear it when you describe that with relationship with Mark. It's a very cool thing. Yeah, I do feel very lucky as well.

I can't really imagine it any other way except for in the past when it hasn't gone well. Yeah. It's like you know what it's like when it doesn't go well. Yeah. And so that's really beautiful that you guys also get to do that together because it really...

Man, talk about going from having an okay day to an amazing day. And even when you're having a really shitty day, how important it is that your partner is there and can, you know, you're not always able to give 50-50 in a relationship. And sometimes you can only give 15 and the other person has to make up the rest. And I think that that's...

So beautiful when that does happen. And I feel like it happens a lot. And especially when working, when you're so stressed out and whatnot. And so it's really great that you guys have each other. Yeah. And to like go, I mean, you're going through it together. So like you're both, you know, it's not like you come home from work and you're like,

let me tell you about my day. It's like, no, we experienced that day together. Like we know how the other person felt or how that went, you know? And then like, you just, you know, you both have your strengths and not necessarily weaknesses, but you play off each other. Just even, you know, Natalie being on the show, like even in this interview, it's just like, this interview is different because I have my wife here with us. And like, you know, when we talk about like, we have a lot of women guests and we talk about some sensitive issues. I always try my best to empathize

But like, it's a lot easier having my wife here who is also a woman and they can understand. And it's like, you know, just like just moments like that. It really makes you appreciate when you have someone who really, really, that really feels like a partnership at that point, you know? And I'm sure there's been moments with you and Mark where like, you know, he stepped up where you felt like you needed someone to step up for you and vice versa. And those are always really great, great moments. Yeah. You spent some of your time.

years with Zendaya. What is your relationship like today with her? It's good. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think we mostly text on birthdays and things like that. When something good happens in the other person's life, we'll both shoot each other a text. I think the last time I saw her was her birthday party. But yeah, yeah. We live in different places, too. Yeah. I mean, I think I mean, my best friend is in Georgia. So it's like we don't. But I think just being able to like keep.

It's like you don't have to talk every day. Yeah, pick up where you left off when you didn't see each other. There was no time has passed. Everything comes all the way back. That's so lovely. I'm so glad. Also, like Nell said, it's like these transformative years in anyone's life. There's very few people who can relate to certain experiences. Exactly what you went through. Yeah, 100%. So it's nice to be able to at least keep that bond. Yeah, we'll always have that bond. Even if it is here and there. Yeah. Bella, this has been... This has been lovely.

lovely lovely yeah you guys are are really really amazing i know that we did a little something before but you are just so incredible and yeah it is so so great to meet you thank you you are a beautiful brilliant person and i am so glad that we had the honor to get to know you in this way uh have the utmost respect for you so thank you so much is there anything you wanted to put out promote share uh

Thorne Dynasty, bitch. Yeah, Thorne Dynasty. If you guys are liking it, I have a code.

as well. Thorne 20. Thorne 20. There you go. 20% off. We'll put it in the show description too. Yeah. Yeah. I'm wearing it. If anybody's digging some jewelry and likes jewelry. Where can they find it? Come peep it on thorndynasty.com. There you go. Thanks for being so vulnerable and open and honest. Thank you for letting me. That's always when, when the tears come on, it's always a, Oh, here we go. Kind of feeling, Oh God.

Well, thank you again. And thank you guys for listening. I hope you enjoy this episode. We'll see you back tomorrow. If your kid thinks I'm not a math kid, think again. With Mathnasium, every kid can be a math kid. At our learning centers, we customize math instruction for each student. So advanced kids get challenged and struggling kids get better. Visit Mathnasium.com to find a location near you.