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Warning, this product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical. Welcome to This is Important, a production of iHeartRadio, the show where we talk about what's obviously most critically, crucially important. Today on This is Important. Do you think that butthole color correlates directly with areola color? This guy has his dick pierced, there's no doubt in my mind. Oh, he'll show it to you. It's right down there.
Hey Blake, you're ruining the show dude! Let's go! Coming out but first, we have a very, very special guest. Please put your hands together for Kermit the Frog! Wow! Wow! Hey everybody, give it up for Austin Anderson! Wow! Yo, hey! Hey!
What the fuck is that weak shit? TII Nation, let me hear you make some noise! Alright, who's ready for your starting lineup of This Is Important? Coming first to the stage, royalty, king of the pickleball court. I've seen a lot of dead ringers in the audience. Your...
Aruga Lord! Nice to meet you, dude. You're my best friend. Yes! Yes! Yes! That is my best friend from third grade. Well, Blake's best friend since third grade, which is fucking cool. Okay! Up next, the podcaster you love to hate, leading the in-points...
Yeah, you know him. You hate him. The leader of the League of Extraordinary Assholes for Arsehole! Yes. Ders, you were so sick in the Muppet movie, by the way. It was great fucking kicking it with you, bro. Yeah, we had a good time. We had a good time. Okay. Now for this next one, I need everybody in the fucking building to stand up.
No, I'm serious. Everybody stand up, please. You listen to Kermit. Listen to Kermit. Okay. They're all standing up. Okay. Now, I want you to imagine yourself with a crumpled up piece of toilet paper because this is how this motherfucker wipes his ass. None other than Bumper with the dumper, admittedly and allegedly the best ass.
podcast whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa yeah yeah okay oh my god okay did the cameras get that oh my god did he show his asshole okay okay and now last but most definitely fucking not least the blue i really like this next guy
Some would say the glue that holds the podcast together. I don't know if people have said that. I agree with that. I'm not sure if people have said that. I agree. Sort of the Cal Ripken of the pod. He's never missed a pod. Never missed. Okay. Has nothing else going on. Oh, you fell off. No, there's... He's the hardest working podcaster probably because he hasn't got much other than the pod. Maybe he has to cut his hair. I don't fucking know. I don't know. I'm starting to believe that that's actually Kermit. Bring him out.
The chairman of the board in the face of Buzz Balls, Greg Anderson. With the roller bag. With the roller bag. This is luggage time. Wow, we're starting it off with Buzz Balls, ladies and germs.
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz,
Bud Light! Bud Light! Bud Light! Adam kissed me. We're charged! We're goddamn charged! Okay, okay, okay. Yes. Hell yeah! Hell yeah! Oh my god! Wow, and then this dude... Crank that shit up! Where's the board service? Let's hear that board.
Okay, we got a board issue. We need a tech boy. What's going on? I just need the board up. Let's get the board up. I thought we did a sound check. We did. I was literally here at 5 o'clock. I can't help this. That's beyond me. I'm sorry, guys. That shit's important. I kind of hear it. That shit's important. Everybody shut up. That shit's important. That shit's important. Do we have to be this quiet during the pod? That fucking sucks. We'll do it live. Okay, let's play it again. Just play it again. We'll do it live. I'm going to come. Okay.
Okay. Okay. That's great. Do not come. Okay. That's great. Okay. This is how we do. Let's see if it works. Yeah, wait, wait, wait. Yeah. Good, good, good, good, good. Yeah, it does. Is it working though? Yeah.
Let's just go through them all. Either you have diarrhea or you don't. That's a good one. Classic. True statement. Classic. What else? What else? What else? Blake. Give me a hell yeah. Okay. Thank you, guys. Thank you. Whoa. That was a real Stone Cold moment. That was fucking cool. Blake, hit us with your favorite. What is your favorite? My very favorite one? Well, it's about you, and I can't wait till later because... Why do you seek my teeth?
You said it. You said you'd do it. You said you'd do it. What did I say? I'm going to show my dick? They've all seen my dick. This crowd has seen my dick. That's true. Not live. Thank you. And that's what we're here for. It's smaller live. The CGI budget we had on Game Over Man was through the roof. We're doing live. We're doing live. Sorry. Fuck it.
I'm going to be here. So this is different. This is different than what we're used to, right? Yeah, we're used to no one screaming at us, mostly doing it from our spare bedrooms. Yeah. Let's go! Yeah. This is definitely more exciting than that. Leaning forward, kind of very private, very shareable feelings. Hey, can you bring it in real quick? I wanted to ask you something. Did you guys see Adam kiss me during that? Wow. Yeah.
That's like the only thing that's the same from the regular podcast. What? Adam kissed me rather dramatically when he came out. Like, rather dramatically. Yeah, something struck me about those hairy lips. What was that? I don't know. You know exactly what... I don't know, dude. Something, like, came over me. Yeah.
And I wanted to make it real intimate from the second we got out because that's the kind of, you know, this could get out of hand real quick. There's a lot of us here all drinking Bud Light. 69, dudes! Well, my wife is watching on the live stream. That's okay. Let's do it, baby. My wife is too. She's into that kind of thing. All right. I think it's for art, you know? I'll do anything for art. Your boobs are huge. No, I'm not going to do it, though.
Well, thank you guys for coming out. This is a special treat for us. Wow. It really is. God damn. I'm really excited. The first TII meeting. This is crazy. I've been waiting to meet you mutants for a while. Look at them all. Yeah. A lot of really, really good looking people. And also...
Yeah. Some less so's, but that's cool. That's us. That's who we are as people. So what do you guys want to talk about? Should we talk about what we just had for dinner? You know, I don't want to stray too far and make it too performative. Like, you know, let's just get to what we talk about on the pod. Who we are, what we're all about. These guys just, Kyle and Blake just came to the house. I did, yeah. And you did. You like big-timed us and came straight here. We'll get to big-timing. I'm trying.
Talk about soundcheck? Go ahead. You were like, made a big deal about coming early, eating Wetzel's pretzels, having caramel apples all by yourself. I had a caramel apple. Meanwhile, the rest of us were having a fucking great time. Dude, I put my feet in the ocean and it felt great. I'm just going to say that right now. It felt great. Yeah, nothing like that. I tell you.
Yeah, I don't know where you were. Dude, I just got a cold plunge. That's kind of the exciting news. Okay, that's pretty cool. Yeah, that's where you get in cold water. Yes, and it's not the ocean. Not the ocean. The ocean is right there, but this is a different, smaller body of water. It's colder for parts of the year. Is it colder? It's colder. Is it colder? Yeah, it's cold. It's a cold plunge.
But the ocean was cold as fuck. The Pacific gets pretty chilly, right? Yeah, it was cold as fuck on my feet. You didn't dip your titties in, though. True. I didn't plunge. I don't have the full picture. But I didn't realize that you do have to take care of this cold plunge because I was gifted it and I didn't read anything about it. And man, it looked like... I just cleaned it out before you guys got there, but it looked the night before. There's no way he did it. No, you had to put filters in that thing. I will say... It looked like so many people just in it.
That was the look that it had. I will say that I legit still itch from going in it. Yeah, you were saying that. You said you itched. My body itches. I don't itch. And I wasn't itching before I got to your house. Could have been the jizz. But why don't I itch? I don't know about you guys, but when I have cold plunge...
I ejaculate right away. How is that even possible? But if that's the case, why don't I it? Why did it look like a bunch of people just in it? Dude, I don't know. Adam just said when he gets in, he immediately comes. Well, maybe it's not a lot of people. It looks like one person.
So does it look like that because one person did? And then real quick threw a filter on when he heard the doorbell ring? Yeah, because we came by unannounced. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Y'all showed up without telling me you were coming to my house. That's not true. I told you. I put it in a text message. I said. Well, I don't read a group text message. I said, well, be there in 20 minutes. We're 20 minutes away. That's what I said. He did say that. In a group text message. I dodged those things like the fucking plague. Well, that's okay. Hey, we just had a plague. Let's be a little sensitive. Thank you.
I see some maskers. I see some people wearing masks. Yes, wait. Where the fuck did I put points? God damn it. Yes, points. Yeah. First points of the day. Tally that. Yeah, tack it up. I will say, no matter where you live, you should always be prepared for your best friend to walk through the front door.
Is that right? Say aww, right? Thanks, man. I'm out of here, guys. Have a good time. All right. Take your luggage. Thanks, Blake. Oh, he's getting a buzz. Yeah, I got to get the buzz on. Dude, I like that Blake willed his endorsement of Buzz Balls into reality. Has everybody seen my Buzz Ball commercial? Because let's all admit...
They suck. Like we're all drinking it ironically being like, oh yeah. Adam, I can't be on stage while you say this. I cannot be on stage while you say this. You can't slander the ball. I don't want to get too charged right now. But they fucking suck, dude. Whoa. But they're undeniable. Hey, wait a minute. We have a live taste test right now.
Well, whose tongue? They suck, dude. Adam? They're not like the sweet nectar of Bud Light. It's Ders' tongue. Dude, I just said that they suck. It has to be Ders' tongue. Oh, good. Toomey luggage roller bag temperature.
What a perfect temp to drink a buzz ball. The appeal is before you drink it. It's like fun to roll up somewhere with them. Would you like one? Do you want one? Would I like one? And by the way, this could just evolve into luggage talk if we want. Do we want to talk luggage? Have you ever had one? Are they carbonated? I don't know. I never had one. What do you say we buzz off one time for TII Nation, the first live show? Raise your buzz balls if you got them. Film it.
Here we go. And there's more of this. Just a disclaimer. If I get to three, I start to lose control of the wheel, y'all. Yeah. Okay. I don't know if I want to see that quite yet. We just started. Nucky Grandma! Are we drinking these? Three, two, one. Yeah.
Okay, here they go. They're drinking buzz balls to everyone cheering. I love them. Rock and roll, baby. This guy's having a little bit of a struggle. The cause of diarrhea. Yeah, that's good stuff. The cause of diarrhea. Okay, so, Durs, I'm mostly interested. I know how Blake feels. I know how Adam feels. I'm mostly interested in what your tongue felt.
What? Did you like it or what? Nobody... Did you like it or no? No, it wasn't... You didn't say did you like it or not. You said... I'm interested in what his tongue... I'm interested as to what your tongue felt. Yes. Is that... Which isn't a way people talk, Kyle. Yeah, dude. I don't give a fuck. Well, yeah, but I just want the crowd to know and be able to understand... Oh, yeah, well... Translator. Translator.
So, like, you speak Kyle, which is a weird other language. Well, it's different. It uses your language. So, say there's, like, a family dinner. It's Thanksgiving. Everybody's gathered around you. You go, like, Grandpa, your tongue, what did your tongue experience? What the fuck do you say? Well, I don't know! Sometimes I don't have the words, okay? Even today, I was at the doctor's office, and dude was like...
Dude was like, dude was like, my groin hurts so fucking bad right now. I'll say that. He said fat, and he's like, you know what fat's like, right? And I said, yeah. Fat is covering my body. I said, fat is the thin layer of softness around my whole body. This doctor's hilarious. No, but I couldn't find the word, so I just said, it was Dr. Brozark's.
He was Dr. Prozark's. I eat because I'm on a hobby. That's what I said to a doctor. I said, you know what fat's like? I said, yeah, it's like flubba-ba. And he was like, exactly. Just so that's a bad dog!
- No, it's not a bad doctor. He understood what I was trying to say. - Nobody does. But when you're like, when you go home for Thanksgiving, they all talk like this. It's the whole vernacular of the Nui-chek. - Oh yeah, the Nui-chek family around Thanksgiving, it's like, instead of pass the gravy, it's pass the sloppy sauce. - Yeah, baby Nui-chek's here. - Hey, shoot me the wet brown.
That shit's important. But you're asking me about my take on a buzz ball? Yeah, what's your take on a buzz ball? Please, spin it positive. Here's the deal. Here's the deal. They definitely catch the eye. Okay. They do have a fun name. They're a conversation starter. And now they have my favorite boo sponsor, which is Blake. There it is. Thank you. I like that you support them. And like...
You know, they're not for slamming. I feel like we're doing it wrong. They're not for slamming. You sit and sip. You sip. And then you just throw it away. I like this. Buzz balls are for sipping. Yeah. And then you throw it away. This isn't on record as the face of buzz balls, but I think they're actually okay to litter.
The buzz balls. They're biodegradable? No, I think they just, like, don't you see them on the, like, I see them on the sidewalk all the time. Yeah, because only homeless people drink them. Wait a minute. I need that cut from the tape. Is this live? Yeah. If this is live, I'm fucked, man. This is my only source of revenue right now. I have this pod and buzz balls and you're shitting on them.
Well, you're telling people to throw them in a fucking whale's blowhole, bro. That's fucked up. You're literally screaming, fuck the turtles. Yeah.
Fuck a dolphin, porpoise, fuck a porpoise. These are actually reusable as fish bowls. Exactly. So the parents who are out for tonight, after everyone leaves, come back. You'll find some on the floor. Bring it home for Timmy and Tina and put a little fish in there. You're absolutely right. That does deserve... Rumble fish. That's a movie, Kyle. Thank you for contributing. Well, you know I'm over here doing my thing. Francis Ford Coppola. Yeah.
Yeah? Yeah, Outsiders. That's like... The Golden Pony Boy? Where the fuck is points? See Thomas Howell. Found it. This is... Dude, you discovered so many motherfuckers.
Did you guys ever own a betta fish from like a carnival? Oh, is that what you are? Like, is that like a fighting fish? Yeah. Fighting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We had fighting fish. Yes. Yes. That's what I'm talking about. What are betta fishes? They're rumble fish. Adam, just take your pants off. Dude, my hip hurts so bad. My hip and groin hurts, dude.
I'm in pain right now. I'm like, I got to stretch it out. There's no way that helps. This is a good stretch. That doesn't help. You did. This is a good stretch. It is. You kissed me. What are you doing? It opens up the hips. Hold up. And I'm able to stretch out this whole...
area. Okay, so Betta fish. You used to feed them goldfish. That's what I remember. And you had to slide a mirror down the middle so that they wouldn't fight with each other, right? Yes. Well, they would fight each other. Did everyone just go, no? No, they said, yes, stirs easy. This is the issue with us doing live podcasts because we say so much dumb shit. I know people are at home going, no! It's off! You don't
anything about World War II, you're fucking idiots! Knocking grandma! I put a public apology out there for that, but honestly, who thought it was right in the first place? Fucking disaster, my guy. See, the thing about Kyle is you portray yourself as like this smart one of our crew. He doesn't shut up. You're a stupid dumbass. Now he's coming at me. Now they're coming at me. Shut up, bitch! Oh, fuck. Yeah.
Public execution. That's a banger. Finish him. Fatality. Shut the fuck up!
Okay, talk about my intelligence. No, it's that you portray yourself as like the genius behind the idiots, but then you say stuff that is for sure a naked grandma. Is he pissed now? Yeah, it's science. I mean, what do you want? Can't argue with that. My favorite part about doing the live show so far is seeing a lot of
really smiling faces. You're doing a retrospect already? I've seen a lot of smiling faces and people are excited. And then seeing this guy right here. Not you. This guy. Not the shiny jacket. We love you. It's the guy right in front of you who looks like he's a hired assassin brought here to murder us from the future. Not you. Not you. The guy right in front. This man. You know who you are. Do I? I see so many people that look like assassins right now.
Yeah, but I say this is how I want to die. Right here, right now? On stage, belly full of buzz ball. Yeah, it's good, right? Fully spread eagle for my friends. Adam, it's like your knees can touch together behind your body. Dude, I'm telling you, this does help the situation. You look like Dren from my favorite movie. 69, dudes! You look like Dren from Splice. Do we got any Splice fans in the house? Yeah.
Okay. Splice is fucked up. What's Splice? Tell me about it. Splice is where Adrian Brody is like a scientist who makes this thing and then it like grows up and he starts fucking it.
And his wife or girlfriend's like, wait, what are you doing in here? So he makes like a, he has like an imaginary friend? No, it's a real friend. It's just him fucking the air. He's a scientist and he starts growing this like big ass maggot and then it has like a cocoon phase and then it gets titties and like a decent face. Like a good face. And he becomes very attracted to it. And you're like,
Yeah, you probably, if you're like, yeah, you would. Dude, and we're learning by doing the podcast live. The next time we do a podcast live, I want a big screen that we're able to put up. Right, right, right. Because you say it's a decent face and that you would fuck it. Is that what you're saying? Adam,
Any, any, yeah. Durst, yeah. You have to understand that this is quite possibly the most Anders possible movie on the planet. Well, American Psycho. You don't even know this about yourself. You're not going to admit it yet. But it's like this androgynous alien that... Androgynous? Yeah.
Is that not how you say the word? I don't think it's androgynous, though. Well, you do say a lot of words very, very wrong. That's not what I'm saying. Disagree. Zebra. This is the most honors movie. There's this androgynous. Well, androgynous has got, like, dope titties, he said. Yeah. So, hello. Welcome to the fucking present, bro. Fair enough. Hey, look, I don't want to get too charged, not down here in Irvine, you know. I don't want to get too charged right now. That'd be a good cut. But wait, are you just going to explain the plot of the movie again?
Yeah, he fucks an alien. I know, I said that. I know, and I said that's the most Ders movie ever. Did I tell you guys? I might have said it on the pod, I can't remember. But when I first met Ders, we met at Second City Conservatory, and afterward, I was like, oh, this guy might be a serial killer. Right. He's an assassin. Like you, like you, dude.
He might be a serial killer or he's really funny and maybe both. You should come to my apartment. You should come to my apartment and we should write something. What are you wearing? And, uh,
I go to his apartment. He's not a serial killer. And then we write together. And he then gives me, he goes, I want you to know who I am as a comedian. And I'm like, all right. And then he hands me Jamie Foxx's Live from the Foxhole DVD. I might need security. Go ahead. Sorry. It's different. Sorry. It's different. Okay. This is different. This is different.
There we go. I slipped. He's having a health scare right now. A lot of people care. And then he gave me American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis. The book. I'm going to read a fucking book, dude. I watched that movie. That's fine, too. I'm a dumbass. But that was a perfect description of Ders in his comedy. And everyone gets the copy tonight of both
No. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. No, we didn't do that. We didn't do that. God, that'd be good. I'm not that organized. There's no fucking way. Next time. Next time. Next time.
Right.
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Do we have any OCC pirates in the building? Oh, that's a good question. Arr. We got some fellow dummies. What's up, y'all? I feel like there's actually one guy who went and then you guys are sort of lying, but nobody went to Orange Coast Community College? They're there. They raised their hands. You're lying, dude. There's no way. We got one right here. I love going to Orange Coast College because Orange Coast, people are watching at home and stuff.
And they're probably so disappointed. They're like, I thought this was going to be better. Well, they're waiting to see your fucking butthole and dick, dude. Ain't no way. Well, no. What I said was we have to do a, what do they call those? An NFT of each of our buttholes. Loose butthole. So we do, it's like we take a photo of our actual butthole and then we split it into fours and then you can, people can guess whose butthole is which.
So brown. It's science. So brown. Mine? Wait, I feel like they would know. I don't know. I was rolling dice, dude. I was like, who knows? Mine is so brown. Don't you feel like people would know right away whose is who? I do think everyone would know. I think they would know. Like when we bought our cars after season one and everyone's like, well, that's yours, that's yours. They would know our butthole. I have a legit question. But would they know a quarter of our buttholes? Yeah, see, that's the issue because you know Bliggs. Oh.
Blades is like very white, like he bleaches it. Wait, what? It's science. Pink. Yeah, it's like a very virgin butthole, like shit hasn't come out of it. You're like, what is it going on? What do you think my lifestyle is, brother? I drink buzz balls. I have diarrhea on the regular. Dude.
No, the thing is, you drink buzz balls and you shit out your dick. Either you have diarrhea or you don't. That is not what happens when you drink these. Let's do a disclaimer. I feel great. I feel better than ever right now. But I do have a question. Do you think... Do buzz balls cure COVID? For days. Do you think that butthole color correlates directly with areola color? Oh, that's a good question.
Yeah. So if you meet somebody with very pink, pink nipples, do they have a very pink butthole? I love that this is for sure something you've been thinking for a very long time. Kyle actually doesn't have as gross nipples as I would suspect. So maybe you want to take back the whole butthole comment. You know what I mean?
No, I think you have a butthole that's little and kind of tan. Your boobs are huge. Okay, wait. This is also another scientific question. Adam prejudged my butthole. I did, and I take that back. Based on probably facial hair. But also, maybe did I like that? That's why I open mouth kissed you when I started the show. Dude, you kissed number two. It was an open mouth. It'll happen again. It'll happen again. I can't believe that's the first time we've kissed. That's wild. No, it's not.
There's no way. Wait, say that again. Man, I love Bud Light. I gotta get quicker with that one. That one's gotta be on my watch or some shit. Yeah, not the laptop directly in front of you. Be better. Here's another question. Pretty scientific if you ask me. If the butthole color...
Dude, hey, don't act like you didn't know this is what it was going to devolve into. Within like 15 minutes, we're like, all right. Blake Anderson, ladies and gentlemen. Talked about the cold plunge and some jizz in my cold plunge. And then immediately to buttholes. You roasted me. It's cool because Blake gets up here, gets back in the groove, and you're like, your dad is here. He's right there.
Hell yeah. Shout out to my dad. Shout out to my dad. There he is. I love it. That's a freaking solver right there. Tim, go ahead. Stand up for the people.
Tim, go ahead. Stand up. Come on, Tim. Tim, go ahead. There he is. Tim brought us to OC. He doesn't have hair like me at all. But if I could get back to the butthole shit that I was talking about. Yeah, let's do that. I'm back on a serious note. I'm a serious note. Butthole shit. If you think that the color of the butthole correlates directly with the color of the areola... The nipple...
Yeah, the areola great. So you know how some areolas are bigger than others? Do people have different sized buttholes? Do you mean tight? No, I want everybody to discuss it for five minutes and then write it on a piece of paper and send it up. I guarantee there's different buttholes. Yes, there's different sizes. Actually, I feel like I've seen quite a few buttholes and they all seem to be about the same size. And you know what's interesting? When women get...
When women get pregnant and have children, the nipples darken, right? So the baby can find the nipples. Does the butthole darken? Get up and come down with the sickness. And Adam, as you get older and you invite children into your home...
These are the kinds of things you'll talk about. Is that right? Oh, yeah. You're always talking about your children's butthole size? No, no, no, not your children's buttholes. The butthole of a birthing mother, if the nipples darken so that the baby can find the nipple, it's... Science. It's science.
Does the butthole also darken to match? Allegedly! Oh, just to match. Nobody needs to find the butthole. Does the butthole match the drapes? Is it real? Yes, points! I do know, and that is... Wow. Wow. That's the only reason I'm here.
You know what I mean? Well, I feel like we've all seen enough porno that we know the answer to that. I don't watch... I don't think we've run the side-by-side. I don't think we've ran the side-by-side, color-to-color. You'd have to run a side-by-side... That's all I look at it for. You'd have to be like, okay, those nipples match that butthole in this instance, and then those nipples match that same butthole in this instance. And then if that is...
This was literally my science fair project in junior high. Oh, man. This was your diorama? This was right here. I had buttholes in my diorama. See ya. Points, points, points. Yeah, okay. Goddamn. You didn't have a diorama or you don't. The cause of diorama. The cause of diorama. I'll just build on what you did. Di-a-ra-ma. So, uh,
My favorite thing about Orange Coast Community College... Okay, go off. Go off, King. Is there, like, because there's a ton of dummies like me and Blake, but then every once in a while people use it to then go on and be doctors, you know? They, like, go there, and then they, like, transfer somewhere else to a good school, and... No! And then they become, like, doctors and lawyers and shit. Are there any people that went on to become something great after going to OCC? How many doctors are in the building? How many doctors are in the building?
All right, we got one. Kind of one? Our crowd has four doctors, okay. Wait a second, right here she's like, raise your hand, and he's like, I'm not a doctor, stop it. You're working on your PhD. In what? A doctor of chemistry. That counts? That's a doctor? Is a PhD a doctorate? Is a PhD the same thing as a doctorate? It's not an MD, it's a... I'm a dumbass. It's a what?
Right, but you're not an MD. Right, so what's the... You're a doctor. Isn't there an initial thing? Philosophy. Philosophy.
A doctor of philosophy. That doesn't even sound like something that's real. Chemistry is a philosophy? You went to school for five years for chemistry, and then you call yourself a doctor of philosophy. I think that means if you know that if you put a Mentos into a Diet Coke, that shit explodes. That's not philosophy, bro. This guy works for Buzzballs. There's no doubt in my mind. Hey, if Sam is out there, we'd like some more Bud Lights. Okay, okay.
I'm a dumbass. And it's a controversial drink these days, right? I've never heard that. We're drinking Bud Light tonight. We're so charged tonight. Take that for what you will.
Yeah, happy pride. I heard a happy pride. Yeah, happy pride. She likes MMA. That's very cool. Nucky Grandma! Nobody gets that joke. Pride fighting? Blake and I were... Yes, points! Blake and I were inducted in the OCC Hall of Fame. We were. Not too long ago, yeah. Yeah, cool, man. Wait, wait. Five people clap for that shit, bro? Are you...
Yeah, we're in the Hall of Fame. It was so tight right before the big ceremony, you know? And they were like, oh, man, it's so great that you guys came here and graduated from OCC. And Blake's like, yeah, because he did. And then I was like, oh, I didn't graduate. Yeah.
Neither of you guys. I dropped out to talk about my butthole professionally. Fucking disaster, my guy. Good job. Good call. No, legit, we were backstage and I was kind of like, yeah, Adam didn't graduate and the dean was like, shut up. Shut up. Don't talk about that. Because they already made like the plaque.
Did you go to this as well? I did not go to this event. No, I did go to OCC for a couple half semesters. Hang on a second. This is why I got a ride for my guy. I know you think I don't love this man. Oh, shit. I'm going to get kissed again. I love it. Do you love him? No, I just said I know they think I don't love you. That's all. Do you love him?
Okay, okay, fair. But you're not in the Hall of Fame also? No, I don't think I graduated a semester from... Neither did... No, but... They got your money. I left way early. These guys stayed. I went up to film school. See ya. It's the Salmono! See ya. Sam, wow. Clutch. Thank you so much. Pizza, pizza. Thank you, thank you. I'm still gonna send it. Damn, that one... This is the way. Let's give it up for Sam, everybody! I just want a party!
Delivering the nectar of the gods. I just want to party. Bud Light. Bud Light. Friendship.
Friendship. I like that. That doesn't make me happy that you weren't in the package deal. I appreciate that. The more words you say, the more it makes me sad as well. It makes sense to you? It makes sense to me. It adds up. Now I'm actually sad. I barely win. I actually said to the dean, I appreciate you not bringing Kyle into this. Gosh, dude, thank you. When I said I was sad, I lied. I was lying. It makes me happy. Don't lie!
Fuck it! What was that? No, it was the one before that. Well, do it live! But how fucking long did you go to college? Didn't you go to college for like two years, three years or something like that? Well, it's community college. You're only supposed to go for two years, dude. What?
That's the whole thing. You go for two years, then you transfer to some fucking school where you wear a pointy hat and shit. Which is what I didn't do. That's the part I didn't do. Dude, the craziest thing is Kyle was legit a teacher, bro. Yes, I was. We'll do it live. That is the craziest thing.
It's crazy. But I was teaching editing, dude. Could you imagine being in Kyle's class? I would smoke weed with him so fast. No, no, no, no, no, no. So fast. That's the coolest teacher ever. Can we just get into this real quick? Let's do it. How did you keep a professional-ness to being a teacher with people that were sometimes exactly your age, older, or just a bit younger and for sure stoners? Mostly older.
Yeah, most of them were older. A lot of older folks. So what's the deal? I mean, I just kind of owned up that I was fucking young, I guess. I don't know. I just did it. I knew... What do you mean? I just got the job and I fucking taught. Well, he's talking about having, maintaining a sense of professionalism and not fucking all your students, dude. We're talking about... That or just like...
All right. This dude definitely will buy weed from me. Like, how did you not just become the world's biggest drug dealer? I did sell weed. I did sell weed to the other teachers. I did sell weed to the other kids. Yes. Hey, you can't fire him now. He made it. No, I did. I did. It was like a different. It was just a different time. I had it. Remember when we were selling a lot of weed?
Fucking play it cool, man. I guess it's legal now. Yeah, whatever that era was, that was when I was teaching. It was legal. It's legal to smoke it. It's definitely legal. Yeah, but not to sell it. Aren't we talking about selling it? Dude, it's legal. There's fucking stores everywhere. What do you mean it's legal? To go outside of the spectrum improv. Well, don't be a fucking narc, dude. These guys are cool. Yeah, you guys are cool, man. I just want...
Justice and order in this society. I need to understand what's happening. But yeah, I fucking... We were pushing a lot of weight there for a minute, dude. It was kind of sick. I recall you guys talking about maybe investing in a helicopter, and I was like, I don't know if you have the money. What it was, was we would do math drunk and be like, Adam, would you get the pilot's license? That's what it was. Well, hang on a second. Let's get into numbers, right, guys? Numbers? Well, numbers...
Well, no. We're still doing AIDS. It went into our drug dealing empire. Are we selling an ounce? Basically Johnny Depp from Blow, dude. Well, that was the biggest inspiration for us. Just as fast. One of you was sad looking towards the end of the movie. Yeah.
That girl remembers. She saw that movie. We wanted the part that you watched, just the first half. We just wanted that part. Numbers. Are we selling ounces to people? Yes. Are we selling QPs? Yes. Are we selling P's? No, I didn't sell any P's.
What would a pee be? A pound? A pee is a pound. Yeah, dude. Oh, you don't speak drug? Live up to your hair. What is happening? It's a bagel. Yeah, dude. People are so... Remind me for my persona. What is a pee again? Bro, I don't know the math. I just... A pound. I just smoke what's passed to me, bro. Hey, later tonight. This is Blake later tonight. So, like, has anyone here smoked a bunch of peas tonight?
People are so disappointed when they really get to know Blake. They're like, dude, you want to go skateboard? And he's like, I don't know how to do that. Yeah, that's got to be a real doubt here. Sorry, we'll go to Big Bear or Mammoth or something. Bring the snowboards. You ready to rip? And he's like, I don't know.
Can't do. They're like, well, let's just smoke a bunch of weed. And play guitar. Yeah, let's just fucking... I don't want to smoke that much weed. Yeah, bro. Yeah, let's just play guitar. All right, here's a guitar. Let's just fucking jam out for a minute. I don't know how. But you give the boy a video game controller. He's got it. All right, I'm a fucking loser, man. See, we're crying. We're crying. No, dude, you're not a loser. I love you. At least I do a great Kermit and...
What lunch table are you sitting at? What lunch table? Yeah, let's talk lunch tables right now. Okay. Let's talk fucking lunch tables. I love this shit. I will say, I went to the same elementary school, junior high, and high school as Kyle. As Tom Hanks. Hey, that's true. Shout out to Concord, California. I feel like we need to shout something out that everybody does. Does everybody have a butthole?
Yeah, okay. That's cool. He needs the energy. Wait a second. That one guy. Why is he crying? The guy in the... He hasn't shit in 65 years. No, Kyle and I, we were kind of like our... Our own lunch table. And it was the coolest table in the school. What is he about to say, dude? We had our own handshake and everything.
Kyle and I, we kind of did our own thing. Kyle would dance and I would film and we were fun and neat and our moms loved us. 69! I think you guys were the cool kids in your group, but then definitely there was like a school shooter in your group that like...
He didn't shoot up a school because he was your friend. I will say after the first... Well, that's a testament to friendship. Yeah, that is. That's why friendship is very important. Everybody knows that one friend that could have taken a hard left. Sure, sure. And it's because you were friends with him, he didn't shoot up a local Target. That's right. Stay being friends. Yeah, let's give it up for being the friend of the weirdo, everybody. Dude.
Friends. Yeah, man. Friends, friends. And maybe we don't even call them weirdos so they don't shoot up schools. Maybe that's not a cool thing. The fucking weirdos. Shout out if you befriended the smelly kid, all right? Okay. Well, I think smelly kid's worse than being a weirdo. Well, Kyle had a lazy eye for a really long time. All right.
I did. I did. I don't know what happened to it. What happened to it? I fucking don't know what happened. He wore corrective glasses for like 10 years or more. More than that. Since I was eight. And then one doctor goes... 22. We talked about this. A doctor goes, well, you shouldn't be wearing those glasses. He took off the glasses and then like a week or two later it just straightened out. Yep. Yep. I didn't need the corrective lenses anymore.
fucking crazy, but I was wearing it. Adam, what lunch table were you at? Wait, what did he say? Wait, was this the same doctor that told you you had flippy flappy? Floppy floppy fat. You need flippy flaps for your godfrey. Bro, you got way too much flab on. He's like, you know what's... You know what obesity is, right? And you're like, flippy flappy...
And he goes, yeah, you know what mental retardation is, right? Well, wiggly womp.
It's just the way my family speaks. It's the way my family speaks. I can't stop eating. And now it's just a pleasure to stare into your eyes. Right back at you. Adam, what table were you sitting at? Because I guarantee it was like, what, Abercrombie or some shit, bro. Oh, that was good. I definitely had a white baseball cap that said, cop. Oh, was that Southern...
The University of South Carolina. South Carolina, right? That's kind of cool. I was letting him know. Naughty. I was like, I got one. Yeah. Wait, like a white hat? It was a white hat. Oh. I didn't even wear a white hat, dude. Really? And I look like a guy that's wearing a white hat. Yeah, dude, you had popped collars. That's way worse than me wearing a white hat. Were you wearing three buttons? That's like a Duke lacrosse player move. Yeah, that was my dream.
Yeah, I guess that panned out. To be part of that crew. You lose! No, I feel like my group was like, there wasn't, we weren't talking about education much.
It was a lot of like, on Monday morning, it was like trying to, it was Monday at lunch, figuring out where we're going to drink, you know, Keystone Lights the next weekend. What are these fingers doing? That's a good observation. Dude, I'm a professional comedian. I just don't want you to lose that mic. No, it's a professional comedian. Have you ever seen Chris Rock do stand-up? What does he do? The guy's all fingers. He's like...
Chris Rock. Wow. But they're together. That's pretty good. It's like Penguin Flipper. Yeah, he does weird shit with his fingers. Wow, dude.
Look at you. You're a genius. I'm getting better as I drink Bud Balls. Thank you. My lunch table was like a lot of people who have cirrhosis of the liver. What? Yeah. Perfect. Future Alcoholics was my lunch table. Okay. This isn't sad. This isn't sad. This is Bud Light.
Adam, remember when I went to Omaha and down in everybody's basement they got a shelf dedicated to their empty Jaeger bottles? That fucking blew me away. Yeah, dude, we party. What's up? Okay. Yeah, you go wild, man. Yeah.
That's the thing about Nebraska is there's not much else to do but drink heavily. Yeah. And just the cornfield gets a little old after a while because I like that, but I don't think that would be cool. Yeah. There's a lot of drinking. Good football, at least for in the 90s. And now it's... I love the 90s, man. In the 90s. The 90s freaking rock. Big favorite decade. Yeah, big 90s fans here. 90s rock. And also early 2000s, maybe best generation of music. Puddle of Mud.
Puddle of mud. That's on the same level as like a... That was one. You find out Adam only knows puddle of mud. Puddle of mud. Dude, what was puddle of mud's big hit? She fucking hates me. Yeah, she fucking hates me. La la la la. Yeah, dude. She tore my women like a half-none.
And ripped it apart. It's like fucking epic. Yeah, dude. I hope you're right. Shut up, bitch. Is that not Puddle of Mud? God fucking damn it. Who's up front just said that's not Puddle of Mud? That's not Puddle of Mud. Okay, so we got the world's number one Puddle of Mud fan right here. Wait, is it fucking? Is it or not? Is it or not? I'm spiraling. Is it or not? Okay. Okay, I'm getting a lot of thumbs up. I'm getting a lot of thumbs up. That's a false alarm.
Wow, that's crazy. And also, you had like Buck Cherry at that time. That's fucking awesome. And their song was... You crazy bitch!
Fuck so good I'm on top of it. Nucky Grandma! You got a little titty wiggle when you sing that song. You crazy bitch! This was like a super skinny, tatted out guy. Oh dude, that guy was on all the heroin. Yeah, that is actually a really good YouTube hole because his live shows are crazy. Yeah, he had some sexy hips. I don't know the band, but I remember seeing a man who made me feel something. Yeah.
Yeah, something moved. Enjoy your Bud Light. Something wiggled. Very shagadelic. And then they also had this song. My dad picked me up. My dad went through like a midlife crisis when I was in high school. That shit's important. Which is what I'm probably going through now. And he picks me up in his truck that he just got like six subwoofers and tweeters and all the fucking...
all the dumb early 2000s audio gear for. And then he is picking me up from school. It's like my freshman year of high school. And I come out and she's just fucking blasting. I love the cocaine. I love the cocaine. Were you in high school with your dad? Yeah. Yeah, my dad was like a cool senior. My dad was like, this is the Ronettes. Hey there.
Tina Turner was my first crush. Oh, my God. Wait a second. This is the way. Wait a second. That shit's important. His falsetto is amazing. Wait a second. Hang on. Hey, sorry, bumper. Friendship. Whoa. Wait a second. That cuts deep. You're a beautiful singer. Thank you. Sing us something else.
Oh, shit. Sing us something. Are you going to do the falsetto again? By the way, my microphone is so fucking cool. Yeah, it is. It's very Madonna. We're all a little jealous of it. I'm pretty jealous, to tell you the truth. We can switch in a minute. Here we go. What the fuck? I don't want it. The best part of waking up
♪ Is Folgers in your car? ♪ - Goddamn. - That's pretty good. - All right. Well, we actually-- that's a great thing to sing. - I'm still gonna sing it. - 'Cause we have an audience here now, and they can tell us who did it the best. - Oh, wow.
Right? Can I go again? Yeah, you get another shot at it. Why? Why didn't you get another shot? You didn't do it the best of your abilities right then. That was the same as the last time. Are we like Moulin Rouge with like Christina Aguilera and E? I feel like with this microphone, I have to kind of fucking... Yeah, true. And you're starting... Okay, Michael Jackson's back. It's like, how does Britney Spears sound?
Oh my god! I love this! I mean... You get a buzz ball! Yeah, Blake, you win. And you too! Yeah, you win. Dude, Blake, you won. You guys aren't even gonna sing? Big thumbs up over here. Great job. Great win, buddy. Thank you. Well, you did cheat, because it's not... You didn't... You pandered to the crowd. This is how competitive Adam is, by the way.
Dude, you pander to the crowd. That's part of the... You think when you go on fucking American Idol, you're supposed to be like... Here's what we got to do next time we do a live show. Adam's more of a voice guy, which is you just hear, you just listen to the voice. We're going to go backstage. Okay, everybody turn around, and then we're going to sing, and then you pick the best fucking voice. No, this is a first live show. I'm going to put some fucking... Why don't you cry about it? Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme. Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme.
Shut up, bitch. I'm going to put a little live stank on it, dude. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I'm a fan, baby. Thank you, Kyle. That's why you were the only person who would hang out with me for the first 18 years of my life. Our lunch table rocked, Blake. It rocked. Do you love them? See, I'm the one that said you had a beautiful voice. I do think you have a beautiful voice. You didn't sing in your voice. You sang like Britney Spears.
Yeah, what's your register, bro? What's your actual register? What's your register? I will take the criticism. I'll work on it. I don't know what to tell you. I'm a better falsetto singer. You are good at it. Do we think that is because your balls haven't dropped? That's possible. When's your flavor dropping? Great answer!
That's actually a pretty good, I want some money. But if you have a new flavor coming out and you're like, the balls will be dropping on Christmas. What the fuck happened? Wait, can I give you points or is it too late? You can give me whatever. Yes, points! So how deep are you in with the buzz balls? Will you be able to develop the Blake Anderson buzz balls? If the people want it. Yeah.
It's supply and demand, ladies and gentlemen. 15 people want it. Supply and demand. That's more than 15, and we're worldwide right now. We're live. That is true. We are worldwide. If you guys have it in Ireland, would you drink it? Would you drink the buzz balls? Real quick, before I got the Blake co-sign, who had had, by a round of applause, who had had a buzz ball before?
That's the biggest floor yet. This is unbelievable. That's how cool our crowd is. We're like a bunch of degenerates. Isn't that crazy? I feel like we could also say, who drank Mad Dog 2020? Yeah. Okay, yeah. It'd be like, who has drank fucking battery acid? Let's hear it.
Yeah, some people, yeah. Like, who mixed a little, uh, 4-0, what's it called? 4-0- You don't know, you fucking poser. Yeah, what are you talking about, bro? It's like the thing the skater told me about. It's, um, it's like Red Bull mixed with, oh! It's a bagel. 4-0-9!
I wanted to say the 405, but I'm talking 409. And this guy loves to drive in Southern California. He's from Northern California. What are you talking about? He's not even a surfer. If this is a public execution, I will walk off the stage. Finish him. Finish him. No, what I wanted to say is there was a night where, Kyle, our friends, we all got together, and we did drink an entire bottle of our own personal Robitessin.
Has anybody done that before? Oh, yes. We robo-tripped. Yes. You're supposed to drink that like the one bottle per person. That's just called robo-tripping. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. No, I'm saying one bottle per person. No, no, no, no, no. He's saying that we all robo-tripped. We all robo-tripped. That's what we did. Yes, it's called robo-tripping. It was like we went to CVS and fucking got all the tussin' that we could and fucking robo-tripped. Water trash. Yes, and I will say. Yeah, it was tight. I condone it. I think it's
Bad. I think it's bad. It's cool for about an hour. What I remember about it is it hurt for days afterwards. I remember that. Yes, exactly. Okay, so the next day we went to Universal Studios. Yes, and I saw the Fast and the Furious car, and I got a picture in front of it. That was the sickest thing that happened. Dude, I love you. Fuck yeah, bro.
But I will say that my brain wasn't firing as normal. I could have swore I broke it, and I was so mad at myself. I'm like, why did I fucking drink a bottle of Robitussin? Now my brain will never work the same ever again. I was very upset. Because you're cool as shit, dude. I don't even remember the high. You fucking go hard, and that's a fact. Yeah, because you're a rock and roll. You were 19, I assume. No.
It was like last year. You threw caution to the wind. Yeah, no, we were like 22 or something like that. Then your kid got sick and you're like, where's the Robitussin? You're like, ah. Yeah, your kid's like, achoo.
Daddy's got to go to the store. I thought we had some. I really need some Robitussin. Just a little cayenne pepper will clear that up. Don't worry about it. Oh, my God. This dude's ordering Pollo Loco to the crib trying to get his kid over a sickness. Cayenne pepper. I'm a great father. Fuck off, bro. That is true. That is true. That is true. I don't say that enough. I remember when I first moved to Hollywood, I got a job at the Hollywood Improv Comedy Club. And...
Hollywood. Beautiful. Yeah, dude. I did... People were drinking fucking cayenne pepper... Lemonade. Lemonade with maple syrup in it. Yes! Oh my God. You remember that shit? That was a hot diet. People in LA were like, actually, I've lost 15 pounds. What I do is I just... I drink this water...
Yes, diarrhea. It was water with maple syrup in it and cayenne pepper. And then in the morning, you had to drink this salt water that just made you... I remember... Diarrhea. What was it called? Was it just called the cleanse? I think it's called like the...
Cayenne pepper diet or some shit. God damn it. LA's wild. And then they were like, and then read the secret. Dude, I did. Oh, that's the same time. Yes. Read the secret. No, I did read the secret. And you were like, I will be on a podcast. And I willed the early June Irvine Improv 2023 into existence. You did. I remember. Yeah. I remember you talking about that. No, I did that cayenne pepper diet. Early June.
Isn't it early June? It is. I've never heard it referred to as early June. I didn't know what date it was. I knew it was early in the June. But I lost 22 pounds in 10 days. Whoa. Dude, I was 21 years old. I didn't need to lose 22 pounds. It looked fucking frightening. Yeah. Dick looked big, right? What's up?
It had to have. Well, yeah. No, that's where I lost the 22 pounds. It was from the dick. You had 22 pounds in that dick. Yeah, man. But then literally like that next week I lost 22 pounds. That next week I gained 28 pounds. Pupus. Yeah.
Well done, buddy. Is that like a pre-Thanksgiving, post-Thanksgiving deal? No, it was just like I did it because this girl that I liked that worked at the improv is doing it, so I'm like, I'll do it too. Yeah. I live in LA. Oh, yeah. So we just drink water mixed with cayenne pepper.
I'm not hungry for 10 days. You're hungry. And then both of us just had sunken in eyes. I eat because I'm on hobby. We're totally going to get cast in something. And then it was like the 10 days were up and then I'm like, well, now I get to eat cheeseburgers. And then I had like three cheeseburgers and somehow those added 28 pounds to my frame. Yeah, somehow. Three? 30. 30.
That was a crazy era because Atkins was a whole thing. I had homies who were just eating steak and bacon constantly. Oh, my dad did that shit. Eating hydroxycut before we would go out. Hydroxycut? Did anybody take hydroxycut before going out at night? We sound like fucking maniacs up here, by the way. What the fuck was that? Did you ever mix Robitussin with hydroxycut and then your fucking brain broke for a couple days? Blake, we've established that you're a poser, dude. You're not cool like us. That shit's important.
Buzzball saved you. They did. They did. Who cares? They did. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. I don't know about you guys, but I feel this year has gone by so quickly. I became a father this year. Can you believe that, guys? Huge. And the baby that I named Bo is growing bigger every day. Let me tell you, life goes by like that.
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Find our collection of courses by searching Try This wherever you listen to podcasts. Well, I think we want to do a little Q&A. Is it about time to do a little Q&A? Yeah, if anyone has any hot questions. And we covered all the butthole talk that we can handle for one night. So I think, Austin, grab a microphone. How about in the audience to do a little Q&A for us? We will say this.
Don't waste everyone's time. Not our time, but the people who paid to be. Don't waste their time. But also, let those questions fly, but also, they better be good. They gotta be good. And it's fun like most this ever, or something that'll start a discussion. And then also, if you think you're a dead ringer of any of us, also, you can raise your hand and we can... There you go, sir. Yeah, Blake wants to do a dead ringer off. Oh my god!
I see so many people that look like Kyle, which is a trip. Yeah, dude, there's a lot of people that look like Kyle in this audience. I don't want to see the Kyle dead ringer. I want to see the Adam or the Anders dead ringer. That's what I really want to see. There's another white guy that looks like me, I tell you. Wow, dude. Not North County.
- All righty then. - Hey Austin. - Okay, so there's our friend Austin. - You guys see Austin right here? - Feel free to ask your question. This guy has a very shiny jacket. All right, homie. - It's not a question. I want to challenge Blake to chug a buzz ball. - Yeah, for sure. Let's do it. - Whoa, hey.
Yeah, that's easy. That's it. Hey, by the way, if just everyone challenges Blake to chug a buzz ball... I told you, after three, I lose control of the wheel. Kind of funny. Oh, they're going to race? Yeah, this is Blake's father. Is this a chug contest? Fucking cool for you to come here. Wait, hold on. Can you open that for me, please? I've lost... Yeah, Blake's...
Blake's nails won't allow him to open a buzz ball. Here, give it to me. You've seen them in a Starbucks commercial. Okay. So Blake, his hands were in a Starbucks commercial, and they cut his hands out because he chews his nails like a fucking wolverine. Okay, ready? Five, four, three, two, one. Chug!
He won. He won. He won. He won. He won. Yeah, yeah. You won. You won. Congratulations. Sorry, Blake. You won. Well done. I would chug a beer against someone, like a beer. Shotgun a beer. Yeah. But we would need two beers in glasses. It's cool that our Q&A is just chugging beers. If you could bring me two beers in glasses. I will measure my dick against Kyle's.
There's a lot of tension between Anders and Kyle and I just want to know Anders. What's your favorite thing about Kyle? That wasn't for you that wasn't for you that wasn't for you I swear no I was No, I was looking who's your guys your guy? Do you have a guy here? Do you love him? Oh shit. Oh
Oh, you're married, but he's not here? Okay, well then you don't need to fight Blake. And you're lucky for that, dude. I was looking for this one. I was going to make this guy fight you. I would lose. I was looking for this one. You love him? Yeah. The dude can't stop creating. Thank you, Anders. Can't stop, won't stop. I admire that.
Dude, okay, yeah, applaud, because it's a nice thing, but too sincere, dude. What's wrong with being sincere? How we communicate with each other is we say nice things and then immediately cut each other to the core. I just wasn't finished. Can't stop creating shit. Yeah!
You fucking disaster, my guy. He fucking got me, dude. You fucking got me, bro. Shut up, bitch. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. You lose. Shut up, bitch. Here we go for a slam off. I'm a dumbass. It's all trash. I'm a dumbass. You idiots. You're so stupid.
Yeah. All right. So I got a question for Kyle. Oh, are you crying, dude? My name is Kyle. Very good. Awesome. Spill the beans. Thank you, Kyle. Thank you, Kyle.
I'm going back to shoot it in the fall, but... Let's go! So you know it's getting filmed, right? You know it's gonna be shot, and it's gonna be good, but I can't say shit about that show. I don't like saying shit about that show, because the fans... Wait, hold up. Are there gonna be vampires? There's gonna be vampires. Oh, there's gonna be vampires. Yes, points!
Well, I have some questions for you, dude. Kyle. Kyle. Hey, Kyle. Don't do it. Don't do it. Kyle, come up. Kyle, what's... Fucking disaster, my guy. Is this jacket a jacket for the show? You're like, I'm going to get seen in this jacket? Or this is a regular... It kind of looks like Harvey's coat. I'm pissed now. I got this at Palm Springs Pride. Yep. Perfect. Palm Springs Pride. Wow, dude. I get so many compliments from straight guys that want to buy a...
Oh, yeah. Hey, Kyle. You stand out. That looks like the jacket that Harvey Guillen wears in this movie. Wow. That's the giveaway that I brought from my house. Wow. And thank you. I love that. Well, that's what I was going to say because I was like, that is the gayest jacket I've ever seen. So that's. Yeah. So that makes sense. And by the way, those straight guys, they were trying to fuck you. They were trying to fuck you. Yeah. Yeah.
They were like, hey, bro, I like your jacket. By the way, we're all backstage being like, I do like that jacket. It's a dope jacket. It's a really rad coat. I do like that jacket. Pass me that Bud Light. We have a couple of mic issues. Do we want to invite a couple people forward with questions to right here? Do we have a Ders Dead Ringer yet? Should we just do Dead Ringer? If anyone's ever popped their collar, they look exactly like Anders. Anyone. Yeah. Do we have any...
Let's get any Blake doppelgangers up here. We're having a doppel, a dead ringer off. If you think you look like Blake, come on up. If you don't, please don't waste everyone's hard-earned money and time.
And whoever looks the most like him will leave this stage with some little swag. I think I only see one make his way up here. Yeah, well, Blake, I mean, one guy is walking up and he looks exactly like Blake. He's already way fucking cooler and hotter. We can't do this in Orange County, dude. Yeah, dude. We can do this in Tennessee. Come on up. Come on up. Better Blake. Better Blake. And when you get up here facing your student, say, Kunye. Kunye. Dude.
Better Blake. Better Blake. Better Blake. Better Blake. Nice. There's the giveaway, baby. Dude. We got another Blake. Turn around. This guy. Senior student. Pretty good. Nice. Pretty good. And then everybody. Dad, take a picture of us. The other guy just has long hair. I don't know if that really counts. Really cute. Everybody, shout out to Atiba, my best buddy. Wow.
Give it up. You might know him from the Brozarks. That's the homie. Him and his brother slept in a barn together. You guys are so hot. I love you. The whole dead ringer thing. If you guys don't get the fuck up here right now, we saw you waiting in line. There are like seven Kyle dead ringers. The thing is, no one wants to admit that. If you ruin this for us, we're going to fucking find you. Oh, there he is.
That's exactly the guy oh shit dude, isn't it's a bagel Is somebody gonna let this guy just walk away with a see a potentially so water trail for to see ya Friendship do you love him? I'm a dude. I'm still gonna send it damn Right up here
Give me a hell yeah! Okay. Give me a hell yeah! Wait, I gotta better... I gotta give him a gift. I gotta give the winner a gift. And what's your name? A man you will. Oh, shit. We got two. Cut him off! Look at these cars, dude.
Oh, hi, man. We have liquid IV for everybody. Get it. Get yourself. No, this bro is... No, bro, you... You're lit AF. Hey, Blake. Blake.
Give away your fucking buzz balls. Well, of course. I got buzz balls for days, dude. Good stuff, guys. All right. I love your look. We all need to see this. This is sick. This is like a Gallagher show. I feel great. R.I.P. R.I.P. R.I.P. to a legend. Okay, wait. Do we have a... Oh, we need an Adam Dead ringer. That would fucking get my... Let me see your best Adam. Yeah. Wow. Nobody? I see a guy...
This guy's coming down here. Here we go. Here's a fellow Adam. Yeah, hell yeah. We got one. What if Wine Mouth comes up? We got him. That's a good Adam. Here we go. Do you even lift, bro? I do.
Here we go. This is a little tote bag with a water bottle from BetterHelp. That's sick. Look at his fucking shirt, dude. Here's the camera here. Not a good dead ringer, dude. That is a guy with brown hair. No shit. Dead ringer. Dead ringer. This man was hit by a truck when he was 12 years old as well. Wow.
That's huge. Congratulations. You take the bag. You take that bag. Because if I have to take that bag to my house, my wife will kill me. You got that. Hey, you're walking great. How's your groin? Popo's out, definitely. Popo's out. Definitely Popo's out. Popo's out! Of course. Popo's out.
Of course, Popo's out. Of course, Popo's out. How is Serial Killer? How is your groin? That shirt is tight. It's tight butthole. My groin's killing me. What is that shirt? Is that a T.I. I actually read. Yes, dude. I've already seen that. Hold on. Hold on. I have a question. Did you make that yourself? We found an under, so we have a question first.
You need someone to charge you your merch. This is Popo South. Okay, that's good. All right, Adam. You're being a little too Adam right now. Yeah. Yeah. You got to talk to Isaac about that. Be a little less Adam. We appreciate it. And then do you have a question here? Do you have my honey? I have my honey.
That's a good question. Bitch, you better have her honey. Bitch, you better have it. That was cool. Bitch, you better have my honey! Okay! That's probably the first time I've said that since the show. This is like the most wild librarian in the building. Wait, you know what? You get a buzz ball case. Get her! I don't got honey, but I got buzz balls. Honey...
Chaos. This was like straight out of an 80s movie where the grandma's like, this has some crazy shit. Yeah, dude. Anders, it's like looking in a fucking mirror. Get on up here. This might be the best. I was just going to say. Oh, my God. We're just going to give some Beyond Raw Concept X pre-workout to any tall honky. Kiss him. Wake up. My man. This guy has his dick pierced. There's no doubt in my mind. Yeah.
Without a doubt, you got a Prince Albert for sure. Let's go. From all the fucking you're doing. For real? That caffeine is crazy. Yes, please be careful with that. Let's go. Nah, dude, party. Use it carefully. Do not, if I take that after like 10 a.m., I'm up until 4 in the morning. Yeah, no, but to be fair, Anders fucks like Tiger Woods. He like takes sleep, and then he like takes that, and then he's like, uh, and he loves Dren, so. Makes sense. I never told you that.
I never told you that. Oh, you got a question? I just want to smoke weed with you guys. Wee-oo! And that's where you didn't nail it as Anders because he's the least pot smoker of the crew. True. Yeah, damn, dude. You kind of outed yourself there. Can we have that back? Just kidding. No, keep that. You want that. Do you have a question? That's like $60 or some shit right there. You can sell that back to GNC maybe. In exchange. Honestly, I know you're trying to smoke weed. You can snort a line of that and be up till Sunday.
That's my guy. We saw it. Thanks, buddy. Thank you. Who's going to chug this beer with me? That's who we need. And I want them to be, don't act like you can chug a beer and then get up here and you can't chug a beer. You need to be an elite level beer chugger. Here we go. We got a question. Hey, how's it going? All eyes on you. What's up? Relax. She's got a question for me probably. I see buzz ball sunglasses. She's got a question for me probably. Hey!
Happy birthday on Santa Happy birthday to you! She doesn't care. Where? You went to where? Seltzerland, which is sponsored by Buzzball. Yeah, I knew that. I'm gonna come. And who wants to give me a Buzzball for some Buzzball stuff?
I think you know who Norvac is. I don't. Yo, she came up here for a trade. This is your guy. He's contractually obligated to trade a buzz ball for sunglasses. I'm pretty sure I have those, but... I love this. By the way, buzz balls is watching like this right now. Can you believe it? Yeah. This is un-fucking-believable. This is amazing. Dude, there's like thousands and thousands of people watching this online.
Isn't that crazy? This is true. Here's the deal. We have to get to the point where we do take backs. We do apologies. You got to talk to the buzz kid. Hey, beggars can't be choosers. You got to catch it, bud. We're going to get to the point where we do our take backs and apologies. I want to buzz off with some people for sure. I'm going to go out there because I'm like – Well, we do need – where's the world's greatest chugger? That's who we need to come up. Come up here if you're the world's greatest chugger. I can get that.
I have the Marine World mic, so... Oh, Blake's... Take one. I gotta get these people in the back. Take one, please. Do not braid his hair. Absolutely. You guys have the rest of that. Hands off the hair. This is sick.
Chaos, dude. What did I say? I said, look at this professional. I was like, Blake is going to derail the whole show by jumping into the crowd, handing out buzz balls. You want a professional? BYO beer bong.
Here we go. Are you the guy? Hart, you got it. That's Wine Mouth. He's like super humble about it. I'm kind of scared. He's like, maybe I am. I don't know. That guy's trouble. He swallowed the glass. Ask the question. Yep. Yep. Yep. Hey, Blake, you're ruining the show, dude. We got a question. I'm lost. She drunk.
Yeah. Yeah. So my question is, may we get a shout out? And may we get, may I get a picture with y'all? And two, may I just not be with you? If you're the chugger. That's a three part question. If you're the chugger. Chugger.
That's a three-part question. So, hey, shout out to This Is Important Facebook podcast page. Hey, he's giving a shout out right now. He just did the thing that you said. All right, the Facebook podcast. Shout out to Facebook. Yeah, you did it, and then she just talked over it. What is it called? I shouted out the Facebook podcast This Is Important page, and the second question was. He got it as good as you did.
To be fair. Can you get a picture with y'all? And she wants to slam that beer with you. And Sam can bring out another because Adam can do this all night long. I've seen it before. It's crazy. And Kyle. How are you? Bro, I'm chilling. Kyle took a break.
Not going to let it happen. Where's your mind, man? What are you thinking about? Oh, dude, I'm just thinking about the three-part question. She wants to come on stage. I don't know. I'm still handing out buzz balls. And this is where the show's fully derailed, guys. I feel like I'm on 1990s MTV spring break. It wants to be that, and we're doing it. Cherry Springer. Go, go. Oh, yeah. This is it. Slam it. Slam it. Oh, wow.
Looks like Adam won. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Now this is important! Did he just end it? I don't know. Wait, we gotta get a better one than that, Adam. What the fuck? Adam, you can't just pull the chain on that.
We got to get a full community. Good stuff. Like a big this is important. Well, Blake, you jumped in the crowd. Cause a scene. They're still attentive. Well, because you came back in
Did you already end it though? Is that what you did? Did you end it? No, I didn't end it. We didn't do the take backs, apologies, giveaways. And it does weirdly feel over. But yeah, take backs and apologies. I want to take back all the nice things I said about Kyle. Fuck that dude. Whoa, I was going to compliment you. I was going to compliment you, but now I'm going to not. So I'm going to take back the free compliments. Did Kyle say something?
No, there's a fly. Is there a fly over here? Is there a fly buzzing around? Well, I'll pander to the crowd and compliment everybody for coming to the first This is Important Live!
That was weird. What a weird experiment. What a weird experience. I loved it. I do kind of, I do, this is just like maybe my personality. I do want to know, like, did anybody regret coming out tonight? That's a good question. There's a couple people. Back there. You got a shitty seat, so fuck off. Back there, I get it. And I got a buzz ball for that ass later. Whoa, for your butthole. That might be why he is regretting coming. He's like, buzz ball? Yeah. He's like, meh.
But like I... Wow, dude. We just want to know. I'm just taking, you know, I'm just taking taps because if we do it again, we want to do it right. Yeah, be honest with us. Should we do it again? Yeah. All right. I agree. I agree. This was very fun. And so... Is this when Adam pulls his dick out? I don't know. Is...
You wanna see it? You wanna see it? No, dude. Oh, you wanna see it? You wanna see it? He'll show it to you. Oh, he'll show it to you. It's right down there. Y'all wanna see it? It's right down there. Not today. Yeah, not today. Maybe on the next episode of This is Important!
Play music! Please play music or something!
Seriously. Please play music right now. We'll do it live. Please play music right now. Thank you guys so much for coming out. It was a blast. Thank you all. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you
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