#2760 RHOBH S1415 Part One: Love Papped
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Well, hello and welcome to Watch What Crappens, a podcast for all the crap we love to talk about on Ye Olde Bravs. I'm Ronnie. That's the gorgeous and talented Ben Mandelker over there on the other screen. Hello, Ben. Hi, Ronnie. How's it going? Great. How are you doing today?

Great. It's like a drizzly rainy day here in L.A., which is so fun and relaxing. I went and got myself a bagel and a coffee, and I'm just having a very chill morning. What's going on with you? It's not drizzly at all. It's beautiful over here in Texas. Yeah, I can see. You have your personal rights and your freedoms, but hey, the sun's out, so I guess that's all that really matters at the end of the day. Everyone, welcome to the show. The sun's out and Trulink guns are out. Yeah. Yes. We are going to shoot the sun.

Some can't decide what is going to be on his passport. I'm going to shoot it. Everybody, welcome to the show. We are on tour. We're going out again tomorrow. We're so excited. Seriously, though. Yeah. Because we're going to have some fun times. We're going to be in Cincinnati where we will be recapping Summerhausen.

Then after Cincinnati, guess where we're going to go? Minneapolis. And there we're going to recap Southern charm. And in Toronto, we're going to be covering the classic Real Housewives of New York episode, December Berkshires County. I cooked, I cleaned, I made it nice.

That's season eight, episode nine for any of those of you following along. So we're excited to see you guys over there. Get your tickets at WatchWhatCrappens.com. We're also going to be after that in Atlanta, Washington, Philly, Boston, Detroit, Chicago, Austin, Dallas, and Las Vegas. We're going to add a couple more dates. So check back over at WatchWhatCrappens.com for tickets and links. Also, if you want videos or Traders Recaps or now, next week, we're going to be moving into other recaps.

Okay.

Nailed it. Yeah. You did a great job. Suck that landing. Ow. It was immersive. I've got my legs crossed on this like little Ottoman thing I got from the homo goods. And I really, I don't know. I'm too old to maybe cross my legs like that. How am I? Just pull a muscle on your Ottoman. I Tanya Harding to myself. Oh no, not with the Ottoman. Or now there's a new Tanya Harding, that girl who beat somebody over the head with a baton. Did you read that?

Did not read that. Who was that? Is she on Bravo? No, she should be. I hope she's on Bravo soon. They were running. She's I guess a track person and she had her baton and then someone was passing her and she bonked her on the head with her baton. Good for her. And now she's crying like, why isn't anybody thinking about how I feel? Could you bonk somebody on the head with a baton? Yeah. It's not part of the relay race. We look forward to seeing you on Dancing with the Stars. Yeah.

Bonk Chrishell on the knees or whatever. But I feel bad for the girl because she didn't even get her own, like, Tonya Harding name. I still don't know her name. Everybody just calls her the new Tonya Harding. And I'm like, that's so sad. I mean, she even upped her game. She bonked somebody on the head with a baton. That's better. Damn. That sucks. Like, if you're...

Man, you know, even Hawk Tua got her own name. It doesn't even make sense. But like this person, what'd you say? That makes sense. I mean, it makes sense. But I'm saying like as a name, like her name is Hawk Tua. At least this girl could be known as Batonerella. Yeah.

Yeah, give her something. She earned it. Come on. We could do it. The lift is so low. We were so lazy with naming Hawk Tua that at the very least we can give this aggressive relay racer some sort of fun moniker. That's what I'm saying. I'm advocating for this. Yeah, I agree.

- Um, Batonerella, I mean, I don't know. Okay, so here we are with, speaking of bonking over the head, people over the heads for no reason, let's go on to a Housewives recap. Today is Real Housewives of Beverly Hills season 14, episode 15. - 14, 15. - Trouble in paradise. - Sequences. - By the way, just before we start this, Dorit was on Watch What Happens Live last night with Gabby and Dylan.

And I don't care. I still can't hate Dylan. I think he's so cute. Like, I don't care. I don't like his last scene in The Traitors, but he's so cute and nice. Like, I still like him. And Dorit was so depressed. Dorit is just miserable. And I guess I don't blame her. I'm like, she's bored now, like, for real. And PK won't speak to her and stuff. And she can't, I guess, afford her stylist because she was dressed kind of like a Christmas present. I don't know. It was really sad. She was very sad. Well, you know, you have her...

you know, you've got, you've got some people who are able to sniff out some traders and you have someone who was married to one for a long time and still didn't even realize. So yeah, I'd be depressed too. You're like, it could have been me, but, um, we love that Dylan Efron. And by the way, his girlfriend is a big Bravo fan. Apparently I read that. And like one of the many articles that's going around, um,

And she's a big Bravo fan. So we love that he supports Bravo indirectly. I guess that she told him to ally with Sierra. I think I think I read that fleeting headline. Of course, I couldn't really be bothered to read much more than that because I'm like, you know, there's nothing else I really need to know. I just need to look at Dylan, see his abs, see his sweet smile and try to push down and repress the knowledge that he hates showers. And then I'm fine.

Yeah. So let's start with Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. It's a big home visit episode, which I liked. Everyone goes to each other's house and stuff. So we're at Erica's house and Dorit comes and she's like, Oh, Euka, did you knock down walls? You've got trees in your home. So many boulders. It's paper, Dorit. Yeah.

That's so nice. You know, Erica really, I feel like she shot her design load because we haven't even gone on the vacation yet, at least by at this point, at this point in the episode. And she's already wrapped up her entire storyline for the season. It's like, did someone not tell her that there's still like four more episodes to go? Yeah.

So unless, unless the show ends on vacation, in fact, that's probably what it is. This, this is going to be another season that ends on vacation, which is now becoming a more frequent thing because if it weren't ending on vacation, I feel like we would have had a wrap up, uh,

of the design thing after vacation but they ra this is honestly the stupidest theory that i could be launching right now guys let's stop the entire podcast to debate i'm fine where the season's gonna end what could have happened maybe there was a lot of stuff that was cut out of you know our favorite guy who was like iraq

I need to discuss with you. Should we do palm trees or bushes? I'm thinking maybe just bush. I ain't doing no bush. I haven't done bush since the 90s. Palm trees only. And then there's like a big fight and stuff. It takes place in a fresh and easy way.

I got you some wallpaper that's completely made of Nepalese yak penis. Enjoy. Yeah, so my theory is that this season will end on vacation based on the fact that they wrapped up Erica's interior design journey pre-vacation. That is my theory. And if I'm wrong, then I will make amends to the audience. Okay. Well, everybody write that down in a notebook somewhere. Please do. Back in check.

Please hold me accountable. So, yeah, so Dorit comes over, makes a lot of her noises. Someone sent me an interview. It was like one of the after shows. She and Bose. And Bose who also, Bose makes her adorable little noises too. She made an amazing one this episode that I rewound three times because it sounded like she was literally a video game character getting a one-up. Yeah. Oh!

She does any little sound effects from the Bose arsenal. I know. I think I'm going to have to start recording those because the one from this week was sensational. She did a good Scooby-Doo one when she was talking to Kyle. She went, oop. Yeah, that was the one. She goes, oop. Because she leaned forward. Oop.

Um, so, uh, no, but Dorit and Bose were doing an after show and Bose was talking and Dorit was just like chiming in with her weird, like dolphin noises. Because Bose was like, and then I went with Keely and we went and we got McDonald's one time and we got a happy meal and they said, you look like a happy couple. And she's in the background. You just hear Dorit going. PK won't even call me back. Okay.

just the sound effects ladies together in an interview. Yeah. It's like, you know when a police car has to get through traffic, so it does like a little baby thing. Yeah. Um, and you...

So Erica lights a candle the second she comes over to the house. I think Erica's house smells like farts. There, I said it. Because I don't trust anybody who lights a candle the second I come over. Open a window, fart outside, you know, like we do in my home. Unless it's Hanukkah. Unless you're what? Unless it's Hanukkah, naturally.

You can't open windows at Hanukkah? Is that a thing? No, I'm saying Hanukkah is a big candle lighting holiday for my people. Oh. I was like, wow, you guys have a lot of laws. No, opening the windows on this day.

I mean, I wouldn't be surprised. But actually, no, we as Jewish people on Passover, we actually open full-fledged doors for Elijah to come in. So like, we are definitely- How's he supposed to knock? What's he supposed to knock on the open door? Elijah's whole thing is knocking, right?

Elijah has a real sense of propriety at the Seder and just comes in. The other thing, growing up, I had a cat named Elijah. And Elijah was an outdoor cat. And for some reason, Elijah was a she, but her name was Elijah. And of course, on Passover, the biggest gag we do every year, we open the door for Elijah and Elijah the cat would walk in and everyone would go, oh, it's Elijah. Yeah.

- Oh, thank God, I love a visual gag. - I had a roommate in New York who changed her name to Elijah. Like she had another name, but she was like, "I'm gonna go by Elijah now." And we're like, "Okay." And so whenever she would come home and forget her keys, we would make her sit there and knock. We were like, "Well, you shouldn't have changed your name."

What if it was a vampire? Names have meanings. Okay. Don't vampires have to knock before they come in? You have to be invited in if you're a vampire. Which is so funny. Like, you're going to literally suck someone's blood and kill them, but, like, suddenly you're like, but I need to follow manners. You don't have to be invited to murder me just to come in. Just

I would like to murder you, but I do have certain lines. Like, murder is okay, but coming in uninvited, not okay. Yeah, I respect the space. I respect your personal space. Before I murder you. I brought a gift so that way you could invite me in. No? Okay.

So Erica is like, "Would you like some water?" Oh, Jesus Christ. You started with a fart candle and now you're leading up to water? Why even come to Erica's house? Like what's here? Wallpaper. She just spent a lot of money. She spent a lot of money on that wallpaper in Martin Lawrence Ballard. Okay? Apparently. This is water now. So Dorit just walks through squealing and squeaking and pretending she's not in a room as big as her closet. And so she's like, "Well, I don't know. The last time I saw Erica, this hippie

It's like she's radiating happiness. The house is incredible. Total transformation. It's literally perfect for her. It looks like she's sleeping outside, which she probably will be one day. So, perfect planning. Well, I got us some coffee cake and some cookies. Oh!

Oh, you're so sweet. I won't eat any of those. So then Bose shows up and like, I take back what I said about the water. You're giving me cookie and coffee cake. Okay, I take it back, Fart Candle.

I really wanted to know where the coffee cake and the cookies were from because Erica has a lot of options in her neighborhood. And I was like, ready to judge. I was like trying to see what the box was. I was like, you know, I want to see what bakery she's pulling from because I will have a lot to say depending on her choices. This could be a redemption moment for her, but it could also be, it could go wrong real quick. You mean which got that tada? Yeah. Because you know, that shit was food for last from Western. Okay.

Okay. By the way, I miss you, Food for Life on Western. I know. It's gone. It is? Oh, yeah. It's been bulldozed and it's turning into a whole big tall thing. Oh, shit. And the McDonald's is gone, too. That was right there. That used to be where I would reliably get at McFlurry. Yeah. Wow. Because, you know, those are usually broken. Yeah. They're always broken. Now they're dead. So...

you know, Bose comes in and she's like, she just kind of looks around and then she doesn't really say much about the house. She's just like, well, this is not necessarily a housewarming gift. This is a St. Lucia gift. TM. I've trademarked St. Lucia. And Dorit's like, oh!

So then we go back, flashback, and to the fashion show and Boaz was like, "I have been inspired by Sutton's call for all of us to bond, so I thought we will all go to St. Lucia!" So everyone cheers. And now, so now Dorit is holding up a peach and a peach, no, she's not holding up a peach. She's holding up a one-piece bathing suit that is the color of a peach. But knowing her, she's probably holding up a peach, like, "I found a soccer ball!"

So then Erica- I could never be a woman. I looked at that thing. It looked like, I mean, it looked like the pasta that Denise Richards tried to make in the Denise Richards episode after this, where she wouldn't rest the dough. She's like, "Just pretend the dough's rested." And instead of resting it, she just started putting it through the machine. So it was all these holes. I mean, I could not-

Who looks at that and is like, you know what? I can wear that. I just can't do that. I can't do it. I wish. I mean, someday. Listen, I support it. I just don't know who has the vision for that because it honestly did look like the discards from the fabric after I cut some pieces out to sew something and you have all these weird shapes left over. So they're like, oh, we'll make this into a bathing suit. Sure.

So Erica's like, well, that is beautiful. That color is really fucking good. That's a fucking great color. Okay, relax, Erica. It's a peach bikini. So then Bo's like, literally for every single person. So Bo says, obviously this woman do not know how to plan a girl's trip without any kind of drama. And luckily for them, I invented girl's trips and I marketed them at Netflix. And I believe they deserve a trip that is about fun and the sun and having good time. And to that I say, oh, bleep, bleep, bleep.

So she's like, "I know how to plan a trip, so anything that goes wrong is these girls' fault, not my fault." So Dorit is just staring at her swimsuit bottoms with her mouth open, and I think she doesn't like them because they're very big bottoms for some reason. I don't know, she's looking at them like she doesn't really like it, but you know what? Beggars can't be choosers, so she's gonna take it. And Bo says, "It's gonna be a fashion show out there, a real fashion show." And they're all like,

She goes, oh, I didn't even mean to say it that way. It just came out. And Dorit's like, oh, shit. That was funny. That was a burn, sister girlfriend. It's time for a commercial. It's time for a crappin's commercial.

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So then we go to Sutton's house and Sutton is standing in front of her cutting board, slicing a cucumber and saying, these are great cucumbers. Which is probably something that gets said a lot in Bel Air. It's that moment where you're just trying to convince yourself not to eat a tub of ice cream. Like, cucumbers, God, these are just so crisp. I love my choice. I love my choice for right now. I can eat whatever I choose and I choose this.

being thin tastes better than thin face what is it oh god i can't think give me the fucking ice cream and she says how many do i have to eat waylon pavlov has nothing on me because waylon's her dog and so garcelle shows up and uh they say hi and everything and carcel's like well i don't know if you saw the rags oh do you mean the bathing suits that

Bose has sent us. No, I meant the gossip rags. They're saying that Kathy is fashion roadkill. And then we see headlines that say talk about the fashion show where Kathy was on the runway last week and got crushed into by a model. Well, hey, she got Sutton some press. I mean, that's probably better than Sutton would have done alone for that weird fashion show. But, you know, the press does say roadkill on it.

So I don't really know who's winning. I don't know that anybody's really winning this one. And so we see the headlines and we see wacky clips of Kathy walking out. She's in a big butterfly outfit in her 30s.

They cut to her and she's just laughing. She's like, oh, I only have the best intentions. Hilarious. And she's wearing this butterfly outfit. And then we cut to Sutton sitting in her kitchen, which has a big, colorful metal butterfly in the background. What does it mean? Butterfly kisses. So Garcelle is like, well,

"Did you see Dorit? Did you talk to her last night?" "Well, I said hello. I mean, we said hello. What else do you want from me?" "Okay, okay, that's it. That's fine. Let's just put the Dorit and Sutton situation on ice. Oh, like your lunch? Hey, stop making those jokes." And this is non-drunk Sutton, so she just doesn't understand why anybody would think that she ever had a problem. She's like, "Can we just not? Let's just not talk about it." Her eyes don't slit into the evil, satanic look that they get.

So they're gossiping and Garcelle's like, "Oh, I forgot to tell you. When I had dinner with her, I said to her, 'What's your beef?' And she's like, 'You think I have beef with Sutton?' And I said, 'Well, it's not one-sided, is it?'" And so then we cut to Erika and Dorit's talking about it too. And she's like, "Well, I had dinner with Garcelle and she said, 'Dorit, stop mentioning the drinking thing. You know she's sensitive about it.' And I said, 'First of all, I will

Yeah, but you still made fun of her drinking thing, which she's sensitive about. Answer the question. And you welcomed her after making her sit down there for 40 minutes. So Erica's like, well, I gotta say something. Okay, I gotta stop you right now.

I was like, oh, here, we all know what's coming next. You said something about the drinking and her having this reaction about her business. Well, I'm sorry, because what about what was done to me? I was like, oh, God, Eric.

The what about me argument once again. Okay, Erica, call me when Sutton is in like 10 lawsuits, about tens of millions of dollars of stolen money and, you know, throwing people in jail, which they didn't even bring up. Your lucky ass is lucky they didn't bring up that Marco Marco thing of throwing those guys in jail because you couldn't pay your bill and lied and used one of Tom's best friends to get him thrown in.

And then get so wasted on pills and booze that they're falling over and falling asleep on boats. Okay? Call me when that happens, Erica. What about me? Erica Jane. Who feels more pain than Erica Jane? It is the old Jen Shah defense. What about me?

And I'll tell you, he feels more pain than Erica Jane. Anyone with ears that are subjected to your songs. Okay. It hurts. That said, I'm really kind of liking Erica this year for the most part. No, she's doing a great job. Yeah. Erica, like,

Erica going through the ringer of this whole Tom Girardi case has actually made her a better housewife because I think that she's just given herself over to be like, oh, fuck it. I tried so hard to sort of give have this whole image and I got torn to shreds anyway. So whatever. I'll just say whatever I want.

Yeah, that's what I say. People are always saying, you know, Real Housewives ruins these women's lives. I don't know about anybody would go on. I think sometimes, you know, as the butterfly keeps appearing on this show, on this episode, I think a lot of times Housewives helps them because it breaks them down. It just breaks them down. And then they come out a better person, you know, because Erica was a true asshole before all of that happened. And I think she's better, you know, better now.

I do think she's a better housewife. I mean, it's actually, I was thinking about this this morning for no good reason, but I was like, you know, Erica is just much more knowable now. I think she makes more sense now. I think she was super, super guarded. She's always been a guarded person, but now she's a little bit more like, oh, fuck you all, you know? And so like, yeah, she has this checkered past, whatever, but yeah.

it has made her, I think, more emotionally accessible. Like, we understand what her vibe is now. It's not just like she's quote-unquote Ice Queen, who, like, you don't see anything in her life. She's just now, like, a little bit more, I don't know, I just think there's more layers to her now. Well, her stick used to be, I don't give a fuck.

Remember? I don't give a fuck. That was her thing. And now she doesn't give a fuck. Yeah, exactly. Before she actually gave more of a fuck than anybody. But now she actually doesn't because she's been traumatized. So I would just like to send a thank you note to trauma because, you know, you really work. You're an artist. You're an artist. Trauma. Yeah. You're welcome, Erica. We we got you to like as we as in the audience, we got you to where you are right now. So you're welcome. So she says, OK, look.

Sutton and Garcelle cut me no breaks when I was going through the lowest point in my life.

they had no problem talking about these lawsuits and medication and drinking and all these alleged things. And we see a shot of Sutton confronting, I'm sorry, Sutton and Garcelle confronting Erica. I'm like, well, the difference is though, they gave you shit about your drinking because you cursed out Garcelle's 15-year-old son. So Garcelle was like, you got to pay attention to your drinking and your medication because you just cursed out my son and that wasn't cool. So yeah, they had something to say about it.

- But of course they're leaving. - It wasn't good to just come out of a vacuum. - Yeah, they're leaving. - Yeah, it's not like Erica messed up a Starbucks order and they're like, "Well, we need to talk about your medication." This was the repercussion of something that really pissed off Garcelle. - Yeah. - She's like, "Those girls cut me no breaks."

You want to talk about cutting brakes? Look what I did to Tom. Ask Tom how I cut brakes. Just to cut to Tom's car, like twirling over and over a cliff. I know, Tom's Jaguar going down the side of the cliff. It's so funny that that's part of like the lore. Isn't that such a, it's so funny what makes it into Bravo lore. And the fact that like the story of Tom crashing over the side of a

of a mountainside in Pasadena. It's just so bizarre. So Erica's like, oh no, the sudden stop and want sympathy because someone said something about her. Oh, oh,

So now back to presence. So, oh, yeah. So Erica's like, listen, Kyle consistently defends that behavior. But you know what? You guys have consistently covered up for Kyle for so many years. So, you know, people wind up taking sides sometimes just in reaction to the fact that someone else already has a side, you know? It's like, oh, you guys are a clique. So therefore, I have to be in a clique with Sutton. And because now I'm in a clique with Sutton, I am going to defend her because it's like the Jets and the Sharks. And that's just what you have to do.

So she was like, well, I had a conversation and Garcelle defended herself. And I said, you look at her behavior with rose-tinted glueses.

And then we go back to Sutton's home and Garcelle's like, I said you can keep joking about the same thing and that you know she gets upset about, but it's not going to work out, you know? And she says, well, she can joke about it. And she goes, well, she can joke about being an alcoholic because she's the alcoholic, but you can't joke about it. Wait a minute, I do not joke about being an alcoholic. I'm not an alcoholic. What are you saying? Oh, just calm down. I'm trying to be on your side here. I'm going to have to ask you to finish chewing before you speak because I have cucumber all over my blouse now.

So then I said to her, Dorit, I have a question for you. And I'll tell you right now, the answer ahead of time is no. But anyway, if Sutton gave you a Kelly bag, would everything be over? And actually, she said yes.

Of course she would. Of course she would say that. So then we cut back to the other house. And Bose is like, well, it's hypocritical when they say that I defend Reed all the time. I mean, hello, you're over here kinking with your bestie. And yeah, Erica's like, yeah, for years, for years. If that makes it worse. I mean, doesn't that make it better if you're if you're going to just blindly defend somebody and it's a friend for years? That makes more sense than blindly defend somebody blindly defending somebody you met five minutes ago.

Yeah. And again, you know, Erica has been the biggest defender of Kyle and Dorit. And they've also defended her blindly. Blindly. So it's just very, it's just hilarious. I would say it's rich coming from them, but obviously it's not quite rich. Not this group. But, you know, all that said, I do agree that they both kiss up to their friends' ass. Like, they both kiss up to their friends and defend them too much.

It would be kind of nice to see Sutton just have to defend for herself and Dorita have to defend for herself. It's true, but you know when you have your favorite housewife and you just defend them even when they're wrong? And you just know they're wrong, but you're like, but it's my favorite, so I'm just going to defend. Whatever do you mean, Ben? Mm.

Cause you're just, it's more like, yeah, I see the flaw in my favorite, but the person who is attacking my favorite is annoying me so much that I'm willing, I'm willing to take the stance just cause that way I don't give that person a win. Yeah. I know. Look, I know that I feel the same way. I am going to put in my will that on my gravestone, I want it to say, um, Lisa Rinna started puppy gate. Lisa Rinna called the press. Okay.

So, anyway, Erica's saying, yeah, that Garcelle's been doing this for years. And Beau's like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. When we go to St. Lucia, you know I'm working on the room assignments. Oh. And you already know. The three of us are together. Bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop. And they're like, oh, yeah, we got a villa.

So, um, you know, I think everyone was expecting that, that Boaz was going to say something like, oh, I'm putting you Dorit with Sutton so you can mend it. So she's like, no, we are going to be the cool kids. So I think Erica is just so glad she gets maid service again. She's like, oh, thank God. I held the broom again today. It was so difficult. Why does nobody think about me? So Garcelle, meanwhile, is, uh, talking, we go back there and she's like, so,

Dorit and I spoke about Kyle. Oh, did you? Finally, good gossip. She goes, yeah, and the whole mo of it all. M-O, not M-A-U. I refuse to say M-A-U. Oh, good, me too. I don't like that either. You know, they were acting like besties. Besties last night, by the way, Dorit and Kyle. How disgusting. Set up a whole season of them feuding, and then they already buried the hatchet before we even got to our cast trip. It's just not right.

Yeah, it looks like they made up. It's like, oh, they have more than made up. They were rolling on the couches together like they used to. I make this cousin. And Garcelle's like, yeah, I think that Kyle and Dorit having a beef, like Sutton loves that because then it makes Sutton able to be closer to Kyle. And really all Sutton cares about is being close to Kyle. Why? Yeah, I don't know. For no good reason. No good reason. It's just a huge Halloween fan, maybe. Well, Dorit, obviously it feels like

You know, obviously feels for her like we all do. We all feel this way. And, well, she, sorry. Dorit feels for Kyle like we all do. And it sucks to see her photos with your ex making out with some child. I mean, sorry, not a child. Teenager. Anyway, so, yeah, we feel bad for Kyle. And we're also quietly laughing on the inside, let's be honest. But we also talked about seeing Kyle at Morgan's concert. Don't, don't, don't. Flashback a week earlier. We see Kyle.

Kyle standing at Morgan Wade's concert. Was it revenge? Or was it just straight up horniness? So we come back and Garcelle's like, well, I mean, it's just wild. We can talk about Mo and his incident. And yet we see Kyle hanging out with Morgan at a concert with her name tattooed all over. And we're not supposed to say anything? Nothing? Also, no.

So she says Sutton is definitely scared of Kyle, although she says she doesn't bow down. She bows down. And I think it's interesting that we can talk about Mo and we can't talk about Morgan. We can't say, how's the concert? I didn't know you were going. How come you're not in the audience like everyone else? Why were you touching your vagina while she was singing that song? Well, you know what? I think the introduction to the topic is, you know, here's how you do it. Okay, here's how you do all Augusta-like. You say, look, hey,

We saw you had a great weekend in the press at Morgan's concert. Was that the lesbian-atronic festival that was happening down there? Was there a scissoring festival that you guys were excited in? I mean, what was happening? I didn't know Lilith Fair was back.

So Sutton's like, "Don't even say that. You know what? Let's just introduce it and see what she'll say." I love that they're so messy. They're like, "Let's confront Kyle about Morgan again." Kyle's gonna be like, "You're not allowed to ask. Everybody in the LGBTQ+ community knows that you're not supposed to ask people about going to concerts. You can't do that." I love how they're like, "What is the most indirect, subtle way we can confront Kyle?"

So order some oysters and send her a box of scissors as a gift and see if she's battling tomorrow. Book her a ticket at the Hotel Indigo and then say, we'll just be there with our girls and see if she connects the dots. So Sutton's like, I don't want to make her angry, which is funny when Sutton says that because she kind of lives to make people angry. So then we go to Kyle's home and she's talking to her housekeeper in Spanish and

And she's asking things, you know, she's basically- She's doing white lady Spanish. She's like, "Eso, a muchos, pero mas eso, pero lo haciendo lunes para cinco dias." And the lady's like, "Oh, por favor, güera, por favor." She's basically bossing her around about kombucha. She's like, "Do we need, we don't need this many kombuchas 'cause I'm going out of town. Do you want some extra kombuchas?" It's so hard being in a house where you don't really know how to regulate kombucha anymore.

So, uh, booze rough. There's a knock on the door. The doorbell rings and Kyle goes the door. And of course, then she, of course,

orders her housekeeper to help with the dogs. How about you help with the dogs? How about you get those things trained? I mean, like, it's been years of Kyle. That door opens and the pandemonium that breaks loose in that household with those dogs running crazy. You don't understand because you don't have a dog. You know, it's very difficult. You don't understand what comes over a dog when they see somebody at the door or hear the doorbell ring. I mean, the dog, that is everything. And the dog's just trying to help you. They're coming to get you. Kill them! Kill them!

It's like a Girl Scout standing out there with my cookies. Like, do you know who you're barking at? Stop terrorizing the person who's going to let me binge for the next weekend. Now listen, if there's anything I'm aware of, it's the fact that dogs go berserk when the front door is open. That's like my nightmare. The worst is you ring the doorbell, you already hear the dogs barking, and I'm like, oh God. But Kyle's dogs are more than that.

Every time that front door opens, it is like they are making their prison escape. They are darting for the road. They are trying to get to Tarzana. Okay. So it's always, it's like a sprint. It's like a gunshot goes off and they are the ones holding the batons, bonking each other on the heads because they want to go. I mean, every single time. Geez. Meanwhile, her cleaning lady is like holding seven bottles of kombucha. Like, what does this bitch want from me?

I know. Like, I can't do everything. Throw the kombucha at the dogs. So she gives her the gift and then they walk into the office and she's like, "Oh, what a pretty room." And she's like, "Marta, Jesse, puedes traer dos vasos de agua?"

And she's like, wow, you speak Spanish? And I'm just, well, yeah, I grew up speaking Spanish because, like, you know, when you're living in L.A., that's how you boss people around. And then after that, my husband was Mexican. Unfortunately, all I could say to his family at first was, please get me some water and move this fucking kombucha over before I sue you.

Lo siento. That was a big word for me. So Kyle's like, also side note, I appreciate your text when that photo came out and you sent that text. Like, thank you so much for sending that text. He's like, well, look,

I'm the kind of friend, I'm ready for war. It's just sort of like your dogs when that door opens up. And it took everything for me not to get into my car and drive over here. And then I thought to myself, do I really want to drive to Encino right now just for Carl Richards? And I said, no. So that was about it. So Boza's like, well, she said I didn't get to know her, so now I'm trying to get to know her. And here's what I know. Streets. Lots and lots of streets. Make it worth it.

So Carl's like, well, you know, like, I just, we see a flashback of Carl saying, I feel like I was signaled out because you like got to know to read. And then you said you didn't have preconceived ideas, but your actions say otherwise. Your ideas are preconceptos.

So I think this is the perfect opportunity to get to open up to each other and get to know each other. And by that, I mean you're going to talk about yourself. And then when I realize that you're not asking me a single question, I may volunteer some information about my life. Okay, let's start this. Kyle looks so shocked when she actually happens to listen to something somebody else said. She's like, oh.

I know. Kyle's like, oh, I have the floor. Okay, let me take this. So Kyle starts doing this. Well, when I first met you, I mean, Mauricio had just moved out and Bo's like, oh, I see. Bo's is like in full therapist mode. And well, I just feel like I'm gonna get really emotional right now because

I'm finally getting to have my scene because Tariq kind of stole my storyline this year. It's supposed to be my storyline because I kind of like soft launched it at the end of last season. So I thought this would be my moment and it's like Hershey took it. So I'm kind of like, I haven't been able to cry like this yet. Anyway, I don't know why I could feel like I could feel it was coming. Like I don't want to do that right now, but like, I just want to be able to explain in the most open and honest hashtag. I trademarked that way. And I just want to get to know what I just want you to get to know me and explain everything because like the way we did it, I don't know. We were kind of like the

best divorce couple of all time and like we're gonna be on the couple of the unknot magazine and like now i don't know if we can be because like he's kissing some skank and mykonos i just i don't know it's like a lot for me right now

Oh, Kyle. I almost fell for the trap of feeling for Kyle because I was kind of feeling for him. I'm like, yeah, that must really suck to see your ex making out with someone. But then I remembered that he also knows what it's like to see your wife making out with some younger woman. Kyle. Getting tattoos of her. And then her saying that she wants a separation. And then now she's like, and then he left. And I just act, I'm just like, what? Like, what did he, why would he leave? She's like, finally, I said, he's going to move out. Like, it was just so strange. Like,

I was like, it's really happening. I was like, yeah, because you told him he wanted to separate. Like, what are you Kyle?

Yeah, I did actually feel bad for her. Even I had, I went through the exact same journey where she's like, oh, you know, that sucks. Like you've been with someone for 25 years. I literally could not imagine if this is something that happened like with Dom. And so I'm like, oh God, that would break my heart. So I felt for her. But then I was also thinking like, this is so Kyle because it's, you know, it's like, what about all the Morgan Wade stuff? You know? So anyway, Boze is like, well,

This is a real sad story, but I have sort of a funny, not really funny, maybe morbid, but here's my story, since you didn't ask. She's like, yeah, I'm really sorry about your husband leaving you. Mine died. Kyle's like, oh. Kyle just looks at her like, oh, wow. Something you may have known if you'd ever asked me a single question this entire season. We're on episode 15, goddammit. Anyway, so Peter died, and Layla was four, and we'd been separated before he got sick, and I was afraid to ask him for a divorce, because, you know...

He's sick. And then I didn't want to be mad at me. But we were separated. And they started seeing this other bitch. And she came in there. I walked into the hospital room. And she was kissing his forehead. And I was like, everyone out. I lost my mind. Get this bitch out of here. Yeah, this was interesting. I don't think I remember that they were separated before they got divorced. I didn't know that either. Yeah, they separated. He got cancer. And then he, you know, this is fucking men, I'm telling you. Still get a girlfriend, you know? Still want a man.

men will still get a goddamn girlfriend i'll tell you men men can just men do it what can i tell you especially on like rich men you know yeah so uh he got a girlfriend when he saw her like rubbing his bald head in the thing she's like i mean i hated the guy but still get the fuck away from my man exactly and so um so she tells this whole story and kyle just goes wow

Do you have any follow-up questions, Kyle? Do you want to know more about this situation? I think Kyle was, that's what I'm saying when Kyle was like legitimately shocked because she's used to just not listening to people, but Bose kind of caught her off guard because she's so business-like, you know, and Kyle was actually listening. It was like, I mean, damn it, she trumped me. How am I going to trump this? But Kyle's also like, yeah, she's like, well, I still had some more points I wanted to make about Mauricio being in an airport in Mykonos, but you kind of played the

my husband died of cancer and also was seeing another woman at the same time thing. So I don't really know how to pivot back to my scene. So then she just goes back. She goes, you know, obviously I didn't love seeing that. Like he feels bad enough as it is. I don't know. He feels horrible, but like I know well enough to know that. I'm like, okay, Kyle, we'll just go right back to Mauricio in the airport. Yeah. After Bose just told this story, you know? Yeah. The struggling with the feelings of somebody that you love moving on, even though they're about to die.

And where does that leave you? Kyle's like, but the paparazzi, right? I mean, okay, wait.

Did paparazzi shoot pictures of this lady rubbing your dad's husband bald head? Okay. I win. I win. Still winning. Okay. Let's go back to my story now. So she's telling her, you know, he feels bad because he knows I'm in it. You know, it hurt me and it hurt the girls. And it's like, okay, well, when are you all supposed to move on now? Hold on. I'm going to actually eat something which you don't see where you don't see on the show. I'm going to eat a carrot. Answer me.

Oh yeah, I did notice that. She leaned all the way over for that. You know, she thought, I'm just going to do this discreetly. I'm sure they won't put it on the show. And they're like, get her reaching for that camera. She was like... So, by the way, I think it's so strange that Kyle keeps on going out of her way to say, I know that Mauricio would never want to hurt me. And so he probably did not have any idea there was a photographer there. I can't say the same for that bitch. Yeah, exactly.

like a woman as usual what the fuck like like why i was always on the men's team but i mean i think that part of it is that she is trying to protect her kids a little bit there she doesn't want us to sow discord in her own family but like it's kind of like just why are you even why are you even mentioning it then i just think it's like shady that she does she's totally absolving marisa i mean what part of marisa wearing like a million beads and puka necklaces

says that this guy is not going through a midlife crisis and being as petty as possible. I mean, yeah, I think it's totally viable that he knew about the photographer.

Yeah, I mean, I think it doesn't even matter because you left him, Kyle. That's it. That's what happens when you say get out. Now, is it deserved? Probably. He's probably cheated on you a million times. I'm not saying it's not deserved, but I don't like the whole blaming the woman thing. Like, you don't know that chick. Leave her alone. She sees a rich man that she's dating in an airport and she's making out with him. Like, you go, girl. Get your bag.

Get your bag. But Kyle coming on national television and insinuating every single week that this is just some dirty slut who's trying to hurt her children. It's like, oh, okay. All right. Well, I mean, he wouldn't want to hurt me in any way or our girls. Well, when are you supposed to move on? She's like, well, we're separated and we're not divorced. And we haven't filed for divorce. So how long do you think you can do that for? What I'm trying to say is...

It's been a long time you've been talking about this bullshit. So it's either should I get off the pot? You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Have I mentioned cancer? Yeah. She's like, yeah, well, you know, the photo changed things, I guess. And just the photo changed things. Is that what you're saying? And she's like, yeah, I mean, I have to have a conversation, you know, like, I mean, I mean, it gives me permission, right? The photo. And she goes, mm hmm. Mm hmm. Hold on a minute. All right. Go ahead.

So this is going to be the first time that you see him see each other since since he's been in Europe. Would you like to join us? I would actually. So she's just sitting over there making all these noises. And finally, Kyle just starts having to crack up. She's like, oh, my God. It's hilarious.

Hello there. This is a two-part recap, okay? This is the end of part one. So thank you so much for listening to this. Just come back a little later for part two.

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At 24, I lost my narrative, or rather it was stolen from me. And the Monica Lewinsky that my friends and family knew was usurped by false narratives, callous jokes, and politics. I

I would define reclaiming as to take back what was yours. Something you possess is lost or stolen, and ultimately you triumph in finding it again. So I think listeners can expect me to be chatting with folks, both recognizable and unrecognizable names, about the way that people have navigated roads to triumph.

My hope is that people will finish an episode of Reclaiming and feel like they filled their tank up. They connected with the people that I'm talking to and leave with maybe some nuggets that help them feel a little more hopeful. Follow Reclaiming with Monica Lewinsky on the Wondery app or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to Reclaiming early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts.

In the 1980s, a rosé swept the country. Hey Mike, I really like this White Zinfandel. Well good, good. Now put it down, I'm gonna try another one. White Zin became America's top-selling wine. But most don't know that this sweet drink has a sour history. What began in 1986 with counterfeit bottles… A big fraud. A multi-million dollar fraud.

sent investigators chasing one of the most powerful families in the business: the Lichardis. But the closer the feds got to them, the more dangerous things became. It's a story of deceit. At the time, I was paranoid. Threats. You touch my kids, I will kill you. And murder. With a .22 caliber bullet to the head. What started with a scheme to mislabel wine spilled into a blood-soaked battle for succession.

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