We're sunsetting PodQuest on 2025-07-28. Thank you for your support!
Export Podcast Subscriptions
cover of episode Esther Calling - My Brother's Wife Ruined Our Relationship

Esther Calling - My Brother's Wife Ruined Our Relationship

2023/8/28
logo of podcast Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel
AI Deep Dive AI Chapters Transcript
People
E
Esther
女
女主人公
Topics
女主人公：长期以来，我一直与嫂子的关系不好，我认为她破坏了我与哥哥之间的紧密联系。我们过去非常亲密，哥哥是我唯一理解我并尊重我的人。嫂子的性格缺陷，例如爱寻求关注、酗酒等，让我无法接受她，也让我感到哥哥对我的爱和关注减少了。我曾试图与嫂子沟通，但结果很糟糕。我无法理解哥哥为何选择一个如此不同的人，这让我质疑他对我的爱，也让我感到痛苦和失落。我感到自己失去了与哥哥的亲密关系，这让我非常痛苦，也影响了我与其他人的关系。 Esther：问题的核心不在于嫂子本身，而在于你对失去与哥哥亲密关系的感受。哥哥需要为婚姻和家庭腾出空间，这并不意味着他对你的感情改变了。你将嫂子视为入侵者，认为她夺走了哥哥，并改变了他。你应该直接与哥哥沟通你对亲密关系的渴望，而不是抱怨嫂子。你对哥哥的抱怨像是一个被抛弃的情人，这只会让你与哥哥的关系更加疏远。你与哥哥过去的关系非常亲密，但现在这种情况已经改变了。你应该接受哥哥生活的现实和他的选择，并允许自己与他人建立新的关系。你与哥哥之间存在着一种强烈的共生关系，这种关系成为了你衡量其他关系的标准。哥哥的选择被你视为对你们之间独特关系的背叛。你与其他人的关系之所以不成功，部分原因是你将与哥哥的关系作为衡量标准。你应该接受与哥哥之间特殊关系的存在，但也要区分兄弟姐妹关系和婚姻关系。你与哥哥的亲密关系部分源于你与母亲关系的缺失，你通过照顾哥哥来弥补这种缺失。你应该接受哥哥已经进入人生的新阶段，并允许自己与他人建立新的关系。

Deep Dive

Chapters
The caller discusses her difficulties accepting her sister-in-law and feeling that she is coming between her and her brother, who used to have a very strong connection.

Shownotes Transcript

In this Esther Calling, we meet a woman who feels that her brother's wife is standing in the way of her relationship with her brother. For years, she has compared the closeness she shares with her brother to all of her romantic relationships. And because of it she has found herself single, time and time again. Esther talks her through the question she came with about her brother, "If you really understood and loved me, why would you choose her?"

Esther Callings are a one time, 45-60 minute interventional phone call with Esther. They are edited for time, clarity, and anonymity. If you have a question you would like to talk through with Esther, send a voice memo to [email protected].

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices)