Refresher: My Fears Are Creeping Into My Dreams
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Time now for a refresher from my Dr. Laura Call of the Day archives. Remember, you can hear my live radio program weekdays, 2 to 5 p.m. Eastern Time on Sirius XM Triumph 111. Allie, welcome to the program. Hi, Dr. Laura. Thank you for taking my call. Thank you.

I've been listening to you for 20 years and I love your show, so thank you very much. Thank you. I've been having a reoccurring dream for about 18 years and I just had it again two nights ago. Just to give you a bit of background, I stopped working 18 years ago because of chronic illness and it's something I still contend with every day, but I'm at a point and I've been at a point for the last several years where I've

I've become quite good at managing the illness and doing what I need to do to take care of myself. And I feel like I'm at a very actually happy point in my life despite that. I'm a very creative person and I have a few creative outlets. I've got a great husband. I've got a comfortable home and friends. Like everything feels great.

Like, I'm content in my life. And I continue to have these dreams that I'm still back at work. And in the dreams, I'm sick. And I'm trying to or I know that I'm sick or could be sick. And I know that I won't be effective. And so I'm

Maybe not quite panicked, but I'm anxious because I don't know how I'm going to be effective. And another common theme in the dream is that I have nowhere to sit. There's no desk for me. And I'm basically trying to find out where I can fit in, how I can be effective. And yeah, that's basically it. So I'm just wondering if you had some insight on that.

I believe I do. And one's a small part and the other is the bigger part. And the bigger part will give you an assignment. Okay. But unfortunately, I got to take a break. So can you hold on with me for three minutes? I'll come right back and I'll help you. Okay. Okay. Thank you. I didn't really, I didn't look at the time. Bad host. Bad. My number is 1-800-375-2872. I'll be right back.

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Automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see. Thank you so much, Allie, for waiting. No problem. Anything cross your mind while you were waiting that you want to share or you want me to jump in? Well, nothing specific except that I was very intrigued by the two-part advice that you offered, that there is homework and then there is a small part. So I'm curious. Right. Okay. First thing, which is not going to be a revelation to you, you...

were severely traumatized you wanted to work you wanted to be productive you wanted to be healthy and you got struck down because you got bad luck you were severely traumatized i give you lots of points that's the smallish part i give you lots of points for pulling yourself out of that a lot of people would have gone on drugs um or just vegetated but you're a strong gritty woman

and you made it happen. However, now we connect the small part to the big part. Doesn't matter how satisfied you are and proud of yourself that you are, there's always doubts and worry. Will this get pulled out from under me? Yes. Can I hold on to it? Right. Thank you for saying that. Yes. So here we are that every now and then,

I'm not doing the homework yet. Every now and then, some thoughts are going to cross your mind that you may not even, you may try not to pay attention to of insecurity and a drop in confidence. You may think this illness is going to turn sour. This is all going to go backwards. Yeah, it's been good, but will it last? Those kinds of concerns are what I call

This is a very important psychological term, okay? Okay. Normal. People go crazy when I say it's normal. Everybody wants everything to be disturbed. That's normal. I'm good with normal. Good, good. I'm glad you're good with normal. So here's the assignment. First, I have to ask, how often do you get these dreams? This is important to me. Uh...

I they're not they're not every month but um I would say a few times a year. Okay nonetheless every other day I'd like you to go you could do it every day I'm just trying not to be a big nag. Every day when you go to sleep I'd like you to lay there get comfortable close your eyes and think of the dream. Okay. And it's going to be a bit upsetting. Okay. Actually in the beginning this is going to be very hard to do. It's going to be upsetting to go back

to when there weren't, there wasn't really hope. But I need you to do that. I need you to go back to when there really didn't seem like there was going to be hope and you felt very lost and where were you going to fit in? Okay. Okay. And then I want you to think, bring yourself update. It's like we update the computers.

Now, it really annoys me because once every week, okay, all these systems are being updated. No, leave them alone. But anyway, I want you to update by saying that was then, this is now. There's a part two to that also. So this is now. I am not lost. It is not hopeless. However, this is the part that's the most important. Should any of this start to wilt, use any word you want,

I'm strong enough to get through that too, just like I did before. That's the piece that's missing. That's the piece that's missing. And the recurrent dream is your insecurity and lack of confidence and worry. So what we're going to do is tell the worry, you know, that might happen. But since I did this to get from there to here, I can handle what comes next and bring it back again. Okay.

I have just to clarify, sorry, to clarify. When I'm laying in bed at night, you want me specifically to remember the dream and not... Oh, yeah. I want you to bring it back in color and cinemascope. Okay. But not what actually happened when I did stop working because that was pretty horrific too. But you want specifically the dream, right? Yes. Yes.

Okay, okay. I can do that. And as I said in the beginning, it's going to be unpleasant. You're going to curse me, but after a while, you'll get it. Okay. So read back to me what you're going to do. Thank you for trusting me. Read back to me what you're going to do. Sure. Okay, so at night, I'm going to get into bed, and I'm going to get myself very comfortable, and then I'm going to...

remember the dream, every detail that I can bring up, every smell, sound, color, nuance. Good. And I'm going to sit with that and I'm going to tell myself that that was then and that this is now. And then I'm going to think about what

what I, not specifically what I did, but just to acknowledge that I got through that and should something else happen, should the rug get pulled out from under me again, I will be able to cope again because I've done it before. Right. Beautiful. Beautiful. Thank you. Just beautiful. I admire you. I admire you more than I can express. Thank you for saying that. What you've done in your life, very few people have what you have to make that happen.

I admire you. I honor you. Thank you so much. So, go have a bad dream. Okay. Thank you, Dr. Laura. You're welcome, sweetie. White people like her impress the hell out of me.

My number is 1-800-375-2872. Be sure to check out my website at drlaura.com. It's mobile friendly, has a clean cut design, easy to navigate. And you can sort my calls of the day, YouTube videos. Amazon One Medical presents Painful Thoughts. Do they ever actually clean the ball pit at these kids play gyms? Or is my kid just swimming in a vat of bacteria, catching whatever cootie of the day is breeding in there?

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