Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
Welcome to Chasing Life Podcast, where we talk about fitness, running, career, and life tips to inspire you to live your best life. I'm your host, Sarah Kane, and I hope you enjoy today's episode.
Welcome to another episode of Chasing Life. Today's guest is Susan Kerwin. Susan had a 33-year career in business affairs with the State University of New York system before retiring in July of 2020. During this episode, she shares her career tips and advice, how she finds joy in every season, and her intentional word of the year.
Susan has a passion for wellness and healthy living that developed after joining a Weight Watchers group when she was 29 and led to an 18-year side gig with the company, but most recently started her own private wellness coaching business. Susan and her husband, David, enjoy living by the Racket River in Potsdam, New York, and have four children and two grandchildren. She has become a great mentor and friend to me, and I hope you enjoy our conversation.
Welcome, Susan. It's great to be here, Sarah. I'm so excited. One of the reasons why I wanted to bring you on here today was because we have had many conversations about career development and now you are enjoying retirement life. So I was just wondering if you could share with us a brief overview of what you did for a career and then what you're doing now in your retirement life. Oh, I'd love to.
So I graduated from SUNY Geneseo in New York, one of the SUNY colleges back in the day, late 80s. I worked for SUNY. I have a degree in accounting and a minor in computer science. That's probably not worth much now, except for the logic I learned. Okay.
But I ended up working for SUNY actually when I left and I worked for 33 years. I was an auditor and a financial analyst at the system administration level in downtown Albany. And then I worked for three different campuses, which were very diverse. The first one was SUNY Cobleskill, which is an ag and tech school. Then I went up to SUNY Potsdam, which I'm a Long Island girl. So moving all the way to the top of the state and being by Canada was quite a transition for me.
Although it's changed my life and I'm a different person because of it, which is a good thing. And then I had an opportunity at the end of my career to take a position at Binghamton University where Sarah and I met. And actually Sarah and I met through an interview process and both of us worked out well in the way it all came down after we had that conversation. So it's kind of interesting how your career turns or it
you might think it might go a certain way. And one of the reasons why I took the position at Binghamton, my husband also worked at SUNY Potsdam and he had retired because he's older than me. And the neat part was I had to, for him, or maybe not, I had to keep working. But one of my goals was, he's 15 years older than me, I wanted to be able to retire at the first opportunity I could. So
So that would be 55 years old. And so taking the job at Binghamton allowed me to change the projection of my retirement income. And I spent five years living in an apartment and going back and forth two weekends a month to Potsdam to see my husband. My children are older, so they're 28 and 29 now. So I was able to do this and it created a unique opportunity for me to become, it was a perseverance thing, a resilience thing,
And it also gave me an opportunity to really look inward and take care of myself for a change, which is something I've never done for a long time. Actually, I don't think I ever
ever did that in my life. So actually some of my friends were jealous and they called my apartment, the girl pad, and they would come visit every now and then, but it was pretty cool for me. And SUNY was very rewarding and it was a rich career. I am not made to be an accountant, but I learned how to use what I had to get to where I needed to be to make me happy. And one of the things that always people always laughed about was one of the reasons why I progressed so well in my career was because I
most accounts don't have personalities and I do. And so that was helpful for me.
And since that time, and one of the other things I did was because accounting wasn't my passion, I found other things outside to work on. So one of my cool things is a side gig that I've been, I actually have always struggled with wellness and making sure that I take care of myself. And my weight was a yo-yo thing for a while. I mean, I never got crazy yo-yo, but in my thirties, I needed to figure out how to be balanced and whole and well.
And so after joining Weight Watchers, after I had kids, because my mother said, Susan, if you need to lose weight, join Weight Watchers. I actually went back and they had changed their system and it seemed more holistic to me. And I actually became a coach for them. And in 2014, I actually did one-on-one weight loss coaching. And I learned a lot through that. And I think
I would tell you right now at 50, when I took this job, I decided that I needed to take care of myself for a change. So I'll tell you at 55 years old, I'm in the best shape of my life, my mind and my body. I mean, I'm in a place that is better than ever. I've learned that America's food system makes it tough to be healthy and, and our America's social norms about productivity and, and accomplishment and all those things make it hard to be well mentally. And I,
Also the idea of having to move, like moving in a way so that you're killing yourself instead of moving for purpose. So I'm working with people to achieve balance in their lives, really. So I talk about being a wellness coach, but I really do base it around weight, food and weight behaviors, because in the end, I feel that if you're at a healthy, balanced weight, you'll be the best you can be. And that's different for everybody. And it doesn't fit on an American medical associations chart either because
So, you know, that's kind of where I've come and that's my passion. So, you know, working for Weight Watchers was wonderful. And unfortunately, they didn't need me when COVID struck because they moved to a digital platform and I was working 10, 12 hours a week. So, so I actually lost that position and it gave me the opportunity to get out of my comfort zone and kind of create my own business. So I do very little. I'm very limited of how many people I'll speak to because I'm retired and I'm not working all the time anymore. And
And one of my goals in 2021, my word is rest. I've never learned how to sit down and rest. I don't relax very easily. So that's something I'm working on right now. And it's been a journey and it's not easy to rest. And our society doesn't allow us to do that either. I mean, if you rest, you feel guilty, right? So that's kind of where I'm at in my life. Thank you for sharing that. I wrote down so many great tips that I can relate to. But yeah, rest, I feel like is...
so important, but this past year, especially has given us an opportunity to rest more. So there were not on the go all the time running from this event to another, or I don't have any kids, but you know, a lot of parents have,
had the opportunity to be home more with their kids because they're not running to a dozen different practices and games and all that so they can they can have more home time and that quality time and so I really feel like looking back as difficult as 2020 was and even continuing into 2021 that it was an opportunity for a lot of people to
reflect and try to rest more and get away from phones and technology and just enjoy the outdoors because the outdoors weren't closed.
and to just really try to take care of themselves more. So that's great that you have a word that you're focusing on this year. Yeah, it's I mean, it's kind of a new trendy thing to do, right? Find a word. But I kind of like I like that. And and it was interesting that I was going through my contemplations in December of like, what do I want to do in the next year? And this rest definitely came into mind. And it's pretty neat. That's great. You're kicking off
Pretty close to the beginning of the year that you are resting in a sunny location too. So that's awesome. Yeah. So you mentioned that you choose...
to do exercise that just helps with your general wellness? What are some exercises or activities that you enjoy doing? So one of the things that I've learned over the years is that doing the same thing over and over again is not helpful for me. The other thing I've learned is I have to pay for my exercise because if I don't have a commitment either, I either have to pay for it, well actually I have to do both, I have to pay for it and I have to have an accountability partner or someone I exercise with.
So that really has made a big difference for me. And I really stress that with the people that I coach that, you know, find someone you can, you can talk to or work with or do with, or, you know, make a commitment. So one of the things I started doing was I exercise by the season, which I think is really neat, right? So I would have loved to have gone to Aruba, which my husband and I had planned we were going to do when I retired, but unfortunately I didn't have that opportunity this year. So
So I got a paddleboard and I love my paddleboard. And as the leaves started to turn and the water got colder, I live up by the St. Lawrence River and we actually have a house near the Racquet River. It gets cold quick down there, up there. And one of the things I learned was that I was sad that I was going to stop doing that. But then we started doing other things, right? So we started hiking in places that
I would not have hiked in the summer because they were too buggy or, and the views like, you know, I live 45 minutes from the Adirondacks. Actually the Adirondacks are 10 minutes down the road. I mean, walking in, in Higley at the, at the state park, doing those kinds of things. And then also just finding different ways, getting on my bike again, because it wasn't so hot and it was just nicer to be out there. So then winter came and we started snowshoeing and cross-country skiing. And now we're down here and we walk on the beach, which I,
I can't begin to tell you. At first I was concerned my pace wasn't fast enough, right? So in that whole, I need to rest mode. And then all of a sudden I realized, I mean, I'm looking at this beautiful landscape. So the other thing I feel very important is you need to get outside every day.
It doesn't matter how cold or how hot it is. It's really important. And my goal is 30 minutes. And so I had to push myself some days. I mean, there's times in the North country where it's minus 15 and you don't want to go outside, but you bundle up and you do it and you don't have to walk fast and you don't have to accomplish a certain amount of productivity in your workout, right? That whole thing. But you get outside and you feel so much better afterwards.
The other thing, I love nature in general and I just, I really take time. Sometimes I won't listen to a podcast or I won't put music on. Sometimes my husband and I walk together and we just look around and we just realize how beautiful, I mean, we're so fortunate to live where we do, right? But it doesn't matter where you live. Even if you live in a city, you can find places. You can look up at skyscrapers and see the majestic landscape.
look of that even right so it doesn't matter um there's green space everywhere and more and more cities have it just seek it out and find it so um even if it's out on your your fire escape or your front entrance to your building and wherever you are but take the time to enjoy that so for me exercises become intentional in terms of getting outside
doing things in the season that I'm in. It's kind of like how I eat food now too. I'm the same way. I eat what's in season. I don't necessarily try to eat a strawberry in December, right? We're in Florida right now and it's strawberry season. So I'm thrilled because I get to do it now and I get to do it when I get back. So in June. So, you know, those are the kinds of things I suggest. I also have a similar goal with getting outside daily around
around Thanksgiving, I started aiming for 45 minutes a day outside. And when it's really cold, it is hard to get out, but it's not just about the movement. It's about that mental challenge too, of saying, okay, well, I'm going to suck it up. I'm going to bundle up and I'm going to go outside. And there was days where it was cold in New York, but it's also very refreshing in the cold too. It's a whole different sense than walking in
a more comfortable temperature. I have definitely found benefit of that, especially working from home to make sure that I get outside of my house because I may not actually be leaving my house for a few days. For a while, I wasn't really leaving my house at all. Maybe once a week to go to the grocery store or to my family's house for dinner. But other than that, I
would just stay home. And so by having setting that outdoor goal, then that helps me also to give my dog exercise because she comes with me, but I've definitely noticed the benefit of just breathing the fresh air. And another thing that I, I walked the same neighborhoods over and over again,
we try to change it up a little bit, but one thing that I heard on our podcast recently was to try to notice something new every time you go outside. So, you know, I might notice, oh, that neighbor put a new fence up or that neighbor painted their house or that neighbor put up a new wreath or something, but just that helps you to become more in the moment.
And so that's something that I, instead of just, you know, like zoning out and not paying attention to anything, it kind of gives you a little bit more intention in your outdoor activity. So, yeah, I think one of the things that I learned recently is that Americans spend 87% of their time indoors and 6% of their time in an enclosed vehicle. I mean, think about that, right? That's crazy. Yeah.
And I bet, and when I first read it, I'm like, that is not true. That is not true. But especially with COVID, right? Because again, Sarah, you just said, I mean, that statistic is, it's crazy and scary actually. So, you know, I don't know about you. I mean, I grew up in a time when your parents put you outside. They made you go outside.
And, you know, I think about with my kids. I mean, we live in a place where there's woods all around us. So I couldn't let my kids go outside or at least do the roaming they love to do during hunting season because I wouldn't want them to get shot. So there was a lot of different things that went on. So we had to change how we did all that.
And, you know, in our end, you know, my parents didn't worry about somebody picking me up off the street. And, you know, I remember that fear with my kids, you know, it was, it was tough. So, you know, so we're very guarded and how we allow ourselves to be outside and alone outside too, even as a woman. I mean, there were so many times I'd be running up the road thinking I don't have my phone with me. No one will know what happens to me if I get hit or picked up, you know, so we do have to be careful. Right. And we are more cognizant of that. So when you get outside, be, be thoughtful about
how you do that too, but do it. It just changes your whole demeanor. And it really does change how you feel.
Absolutely. And even just 10 minutes outside really starts to improve your mood too. And there's so many studies that support that. So if you're having a rough day, just get outside for start with 10 minutes and you'll see how it really helps to change your mood too. So we have had many conversations, as we mentioned, we met during an interview process and since then we've stayed connected and you've really been a mentor to me in my career. And so I was just wondering if you could share with our listeners your
some lessons that you've learned along the way in your career, and then even some helpful tips for those who might be 10 to 15 years into their career. Yeah. It's interesting when you, you know, we talked about this, we've talked about a lot of different things in
One of the things I love about you, Sarah, is that you listen and you absorb and you figure out how it works in your life or if it's not going to work when we talk about certain ways to do things. Right. So one of the things I would say is and I never thought I was a control freak, but I look back and I probably was. So the first thing is to let go of the need to control everything and everyone in your work and home environment.
You don't have to control everything. And if you try to do it, you will be miserable and you'll feel very unproductive and unsuccessful. And you'll be concerned about what everybody thinks about you. So, and it's hard. I mean, a lot of times what happens, especially for women, and I know men are listening to this too, but you have the same approach in terms of, of wanting to provide and, you know, be there, right. And take care of everything.
You can't do it all. And you just got to learn that you can't. The other thing I, my lessons was you need to slow down to go faster and I'm not good at slowing down. I need to get it all done. I'll never forget when I got married for the second time, the weekend came up and I said to my husband, I said, okay, I've got a list of all these things we got to do. And he looked at it and he's like, pick two of them. That's all you're going to do this weekend.
I'm like, no, we have to get all 10 things done. And it doesn't work like that, right? And I love that. I mean, how many times do I say to myself, pick two, pick two. You know, you really have to be realistic and, you know,
productivity is about getting some things done, but also feeling good about where you've come and where you've gone. And the other thing is, perfection was something that I was always looking for. I'm always trying to be the best. Always, always, always. There's a competitive nature about me. Plus, I also feel like if I'm perfect, then I'm whole. And it's not attainable. I shared a little thing with...
with Sarah, it's a quote I read about focus and how to be focused. And, you know, one of it was let go of the woulda, shoulda, coulda. And that's a really important thing, really important thing. So the other thing is you start every day with a clean slate, you know, and letting go of tomorrow and not worrying about the future is everything we talk about. But really like
cementing that into your head about, okay, I woke up and you know what? If I ended up scrolling through Facebook or Instagram for the first half hour of my day, I still, every hour is a clean slate, right? I mean, I talk about that with food. You eat something you don't like, don't eat it again in three hours. I mean, it's not...
It's not that hard, but it's not that easy to. And so that's something I really learned is the perfectionism that I had to let go of. And also being the one who takes care of everything and everybody let go of that. And the last thing I learned, and I only really learned that in the last five years is I don't set goals anymore. I set intentions because when I hear the word goal and every person is different, but if I hear the word goal, if I don't get there, I feel like a failure. So if I set an intention, it's more about trying and
rather than completing, right? And so what I end up doing is I do have goals. I just don't use the word anymore.
I just reframed it so that it works to boost me rather than to pull me down. And by doing that, what you need to do is you need to establish weekly and daily routines that become habits and it changes things and you'll get out of your mode. You won't be in those weekly routines. But when it comes down to when you start to not feel good physically and mentally, you just have to say, OK, what were my weekly and daily routines?
routines? What were my habits? What made me feel balanced and intentional? So those are the things I've learned. When it comes to your career right now, oh, there are so many things I wish I did different, but I'm also not regretful. I mean, my career was my career. And actually, I made so many friends and I have so many colleagues and I'm a relationship-based person, as you can tell by the way I talk. I mean, people mean everything to me and that's why the whole accountant thing...
I became a manager more than an analyst because I'm just really good with that. So the first thing I'll say to you is don't paint yourself into a corner with your salary. The older you get, the harder it is to leave the job you're in because you rely on the income that you make to pay for everything. It's hard to stop. You can say that you're going to cut back on spending, but let me tell you, it's not so easy, right? No matter who you are, whether you're single, whether you're married, whether you're not, whether you have kids, no matter where you are, it's hard.
Right. It's hard to change your find the way you live. I mean, you can create a budget, you can back down, but ultimately don't paint yourself into a corner. Usually when you're 10 to 15 years in is when you can make the move that you want to make, too. I mean, if you're not happy in your job, get out of it. Find something different. Go.
Take a cut and pay, you know, put yourself and in your 20s and 30s, put yourself in a place financially where you can make that change, right? I wish I would have started saving for my retirement. I have a supplemental account also on top of my, I have a guaranteed pension, which is a rare and blessed occurrence in life right now. You can't find those things. The other thing is you don't need a lot. You just need enough.
That's the other thing. So remember that you just need enough, right? You want to put yourself in a place where you can do all the things you want to do, but you don't have to travel around the world every single year that you're retired. You can just go one place and that's okay. And it could be, you know, Florida like I am, right? So we are not staying on the beach. We're staying a block away because physically it's better for me. I walk there and I'm
It also allows me to do other things, right? So I have a paddleboard and I'm going to, because I'm not on the beach, I'm going to try to find the waterways, the intercoastals and go out and do that. And we've dragged that thing down with us because it's inflatable. So the other thing is be genuine and appreciative, especially of your subordinates and your teammates. Being genuine is really important. And we try to be someone who we're not because we're
we're just trying to make sure people like us, right? And we're so worried about what people think. And someone said something to me only recently, actually, that, you know, if you think people are thinking about you, they're not. You're like the last thing they're thinking about. So I have a tendency to overthink. I'm very concerned about
about how people, you know, see me and, and perceive me and what, and if I've hurt their feelings or if they're not talking to me, I mean, it's usually never about you. It's about a million other things. So get over that. And I have to meditate every day sometimes to forget about those kinds of things. So the next one is you don't have to be the smart. If you are the smartest person in the room, don't show off and try to be the smartest person in the room, listen and talk less. Like I'm not good at that.
So it was something that I constantly had to work on is to listen and talk less and not have to interject how I feel. Take notes, write down what your thoughts are so you can put those in earlier. Because we often think we know everything. We know the best way to do things. And then we discount what other people have to say. And then they don't want to work with us anymore or they're frustrated by us and
They just think we're ladder climbing or things like that. So, so really do that. The other thing is learn how to have fierce conversations. That's a really important thing. Fierce conversations in your life are important and fierce is a wonderful word. It's a courageous word. It's not, but you have to learn how to approach things and you have to say words and use words that are fierce, but are not hurtful and condescending. So, you know, the appreciative thing, like I went out of my way with the staff.
that worked with me and for me to make sure with notes. I mean, I used to send notes home to people's houses because I didn't want it to be in front of them. I wanted them to hear it in a place and a time
where they could appreciate it and understand that I'm being genuine here too. The last thing is, I wish I learned this. I'm learning this in retirement. Rest. Really take time to rest. You're not a bad person. You're not, you don't feel guilty about it. Spend time resting. And how you rest is different, right? People think rest means laying down and taking a nap. I don't mean that. Read a book, you know, sit down and meditate, take a walk, you know, cook, but take time to rest and find out what rest means to you.
Figure out what rests your body in your head. Thank you. That was some great advice that I took a lot of notes on. Not only as a reminder for me, but just as a recap that I'll share in the show notes for everyone who was listening, maybe on the go and you know, that you can come back to remind yourself of, and really this is some great advice and just insight into careers and how they can be developed and what, what,
you should be focusing your energy on. I wrote so many things. The Fierce Conversations is something, you gave me a book on that actually. Yeah, that's in my book. You should read it. Susan Scott. It's phenomenal. And it's really helped to build my confidence as a younger manager. I'm 33. And so to have someone that I'm managing that is older than me by 20 years, that's a difficult situation to try to navigate. And so by just having the confidence in myself,
to have that tough conversation. That book has really helped me to know what to say and how to say it correctly so that it doesn't come across as someone who's just like trying to prove themselves. Or as you mentioned, you don't have to prove that you're the smartest person in the room. Just
be a human and have a conversation with someone, but while also addressing what needs to be addressed. And there's wonder, there's ways to be the smartest person, but it doesn't need to be in the room as a show off it. You can, you can listen, you can work, and then you can add ideas in a way that be
Because ultimately some people are the smartest person in the room, but they're not successful, right? How many people do you know that are extremely, you know, just eventually they don't get anywhere. And that's why the fierce conversations book, not only good for your career, it's great in a marriage. It's great in a relationship. It's great with parents. It's great with children. It's great with friends that you, you know, that you struggle. It, it really teaches you how to talk to people about things that are difficult and it's a great read. And it's, it's not a
preachy and it's not textbooky. So it's a really good book, Susan Scott. And I will link that in the show notes as well. I also wanted to pull down, you mentioned the get focused saying, and I pulled it right off my bulletin board. And so I'll just read that to our listeners. So it's 10 points about how to get focused. So number one is give up the woulda, shoulda, coulda routine. Number two is forget the past. It won't matter next week.
Three is to stop being crazy busy. It's an energy drain. Four, take time for yourself. You deserve it. Five, assume there's a reason for what's going on. Six, eliminate distractions. Seven, forget about what other people think.
Eight, quit beating yourself up over little things. Nine, forget the no margin for error mindset. And 10 is to breathe. So you covered a lot of that already. Right. When I found that quote, I kind of started trying to be purposeful about living those things. And that's when things changed for me. I was in my early 40s and things started to change for me then. That's when I started to really...
you know, just kind of find, just find my, just be comfortable in my own skin and find who I was and what I am and be okay with it. You know, I mean, I talk way too much. It's a problem, but, and I don't, I'm embracing it, but I'm also learning how it affects other people and me too. So. I talk a lot too. So we can just talk for hours together. We can. That's what we love about each other. Yes. So
So, you know what I read recently was something about what you might see as your worst trait is actually what people love about you. So, and we're all overly critical of ourselves as well. But what you might think is talking too much, maybe just somebody loves to listen to. So true, because a lot of people say to me that, how did you remember that? Well, even though I talk a lot, I really do listen well.
And so, and I take the time to talk to people and learn about them. So when I see them again and I say something like, oh my gosh, you know, so you're right. I mean, all that talking does get me somewhere. As a fun question that you could just talk to length about, what is something that you are obsessed with or loving right now?
So I already kind of touched on this, but I am totally obsessed with exercising by season and eating by season. Like those things are just like, like just looking at the time it is in the calendar and just working that that's just been so fun for me. It's just been very liberating because I wasn't able to do that a lot of times when I was working and cooking has been like.
phenomenal for me because I have time now I can plan. I've never bought into the meal prep thing. It doesn't work for me. I don't like eating the same things over and over again for so many people. It's so helpful. I just doesn't work for me. So I don't necessarily eat on the fly. I do meal plan. I don't prep. That's the difference. So I have what I need for the week. And I think about the different kinds of things I'm going to eat, but I
But I love having the time now to just to be able to create and cook. I'm trying to eat more plant-based like the rest of the world. And part of that is because I talked about, you know, America is set up so that you don't eat well. I mean, our food industry makes us not eat well. So I'm trying to be more purposeful about that. The other thing is what I'm really loving is the freedom of my schedule. Like I've never had...
it's kind of daunting because I've never, I've always, I'm very structured and I need to know what I'm doing. My husband laughs at me because I have my list again of things of what I need to do today. Right. He's like, but I do love the idea. It comes out of my mouth still at least once a day. Oh, I can do that tomorrow. Right. And if I'm not here tomorrow, it's not going to matter anyway. So, so it's, that's been like wonderful. And I love to garden and
My house has beautiful gardens and I didn't really, I really could only maintain them when I didn't live at home for five years. So getting back out there and starting to refresh everything. And it's just beautiful. And even here at our condo that we're, our townhouse we're staying in, I've actually already gone through and redone some things and
cleaned up the gardens that are here because the owners don't live here all the time. They're only here on weekends every now and then. So it's pretty cool to be able to be, and I just love to be outside. So it just adds to that. So those are the things that I'm like, just loving right now.
What's one of your favorite things to cook? I think my Instant Pot has become like anything I can cook in my Instant Pot. Like that is like the machine for me because I can do some really cool things with grains and I'm a balanced girl. I eat everything. One of the things I don't eat a lot of anymore is red meat. I really tried to eliminate that from my diet. And we're cooking more fish. I'm doing lots of things with shellfish and fish. I just love it. I just, it's my favorite thing in the world and I never had time to cook.
fish the right way when I was working. So it's been really fun, really fun to do that. I found a shrimp recipe. It's tremendous. It's amazing. And I'm really eating more Mediterranean diet right now. I'm an Italian girl, so I'm not not eating bread every day. I have bread every day.
And I'm at the same weight I was when I was in high school. So not feeling real bad or actually college. So I'm not feeling bad about that. And I was in good shape then. I was an athlete in college. So I was in great shape. So to say that at 55 means that I'm doing the right things. My nutrition's good. And it wasn't good back then. I just burned a lot of calories. But my nutrition's good. My mindset's good. So yeah. So that shrimp recipe is phenomenal. I will send it to Sarah when we get done. And she'll link that in too, because you'll love it. I'm looking forward to that.
And it's great too with right now when we're recording this episode, it's Lent for those who are Catholic. So it's Fish Friday. So a shrimp recipe would be great to try one Friday. I do practice the Lent practices, even though I don't have to. I'm not Catholic, but...
Episcopalian, but we do do that because it makes us mindful of the season again. And that's great too. I love that you're reiterating the seasonal exercise too, because I also feel like it gives you something to look forward to. And especially, you know, New York with the winter, a lot of people have a negative mindset about the winter, but if you have something, an activity that you love to do in the winter, then it gives you that much more positive association with it. And so, and then, you know,
by changing it up too, you're not getting bored or feel like you're stuck in a rut with the same routine over and over again. So that I really love that you're sharing that so much. Once you get tired of doing something, if you do it seasonally, you don't have to do it anymore. Like I don't need to snowshoe again. I did a lot of that. I'm looking forward to getting on the paddleboard. And when I get back to New York, I won't be able to get on the paddleboard right away. So
And you know, I love paddleboarding too. My dog loves to join me on it. So it's a great conversation piece when we do a loop around the lake and everybody on the lake says, oh my gosh, your dog's on your paddleboard. And I said, well, yeah, partly because she doesn't like to be away from me. So she, even if she's nervous on there, she'd rather do that than. Wow. Yeah. And the extra weight gives you a better workout. She starts walking back and forth and then I really have to check my balance. So yeah.
Now, and she's got a little life jacket that I tell her to the board. Now I learned my lesson. Now I just grab a little handle and pick her up. So yeah, that's how you do it. I have to tether myself to the board down here. I don't do that in the North country, but I do have to do it here. Yeah.
whether, well, if you're going to the intercoastal waterways and it's probably not as rough as, have you taken it out to the ocean yet? We haven't, we haven't done it yet because it got warm and we had some people here and then it got cooler again. But I also needed to find places where there were no alligators and snakes because I wasn't up for that either. Just manatees. So I have, I've actually, we did some research last week and I've got some spots. So next week we're going to start to adventure out and do that. So that'll be fun.
That's exciting. And it's so interesting because when, you know, depending on where you live, you may not have, we don't have alligators to worry about in New York. So, you know, the worst you might get is some large fish. So to wrap up our conversation, again, we could, we could talk for hours and we have in fact before, but...
Something that I like to ask all of my guests is what does chasing life mean to you? You know, it's interesting when you first said that, I thought, what does chasing life mean? What is chasing life? And I thought about it and I did a little, you know, Googling just to see what other people thought. So one of the things that has been a constant in my life since I was in high school is the song that James Taylor sings called The Secret of Life.
And it's been a really big influence for me because it talks about enjoying the passage of time. And I tend to be crazy busy. And that's why that focused, those focus quotes are important to me. So, so really enjoying the passage of time. The other thing is I heard something, it's probably five or 10 years old now, but when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. I try that to do that all the time. Like I'm constantly trying to make lemonade every day. I try to make lemonade and it helps you chase life in a way that you feel good about it. Right. Because you're just going to do that. And that's,
if you haven't noticed yet, I'm a very positive person. Like my ex-husband, we was annoyed at how happy I was when I woke up in the morning, hence the ex, but I
I mean, I'm very positive. Like smiling and laughing is very important to me. Someone told me once my laugh was contagious and I thought, oh my gosh, really? You know, cause I think it's kind of annoying, but from what I understand, people just love it. And it's kind of funny because everybody knows when I'm in my backyard, they know when I'm in the grocery store and they know when I'm on the river because they can hear my laugh.
because it's loud and it's often. I learned to embrace that as a good thing too. Like Sarah said, sometimes we think our worst things are what people love. And the other thing that's really important for me is that
Being present is really important and chasing life means to be present. Like I said, enjoying the passage of time. So I use prayer and meditation to really settle myself when I get crazy. And so I think it's really important for people to do that. And the last thing I'll leave you with is some, so we talked about fierce conversations. There's another thing that I think is really important is
a book that James Clear has written. If you don't know who he is, his book is called Atomic Habits. It's very simple, but it will really teach you how to be intentional and how to follow through with routines that become habits.
I recommend everyone I coach read it. It's an easy read. It's a fun read. He's a really cool person who's done, had some really crazy things happen to him to get into where he is. And he's got a daily, I'm sorry, a weekly email that he puts three ideas from him and two quotes from other people. And
It's very motivating for me and it's also very, it helps me reflect on things. So I recommend that if you're looking for something to keep you going. And the last thing I will encourage you to do is find a daily devotional. It doesn't have to be religious. Mine is because I'm a faithful person and I love it. My daily devotional name this year is Rest, which has been very helpful for me.
But find something that supports you. It doesn't, you won't want it long. It's a paragraph. You read it every morning or at night. When I was working, I read my devotional at night and I recapped my day with it. Now I read it in the morning because I can. The other thing is, it doesn't have to be a book. It can be a podcast too. It can be a five minute podcast that you listen to, but be consistent with your theme and do it every day. And if you fall behind...
You can either skip, but you have to get back in that routine. Like I said, you have a, it's a slate every day. And if you make it, if it's short, you'll do it every day too. It doesn't have to be five pages long. It just needs to be a paragraph and you'll feel better about yourself. And you'll also, it'll just give you a way to settle your mind too.
and reflect on what you did for the day or what you're going to do for the day. It's funny that you brought up atomic habits because I actually just added it to my Amazon cart this week. I happened to see a James Spear post. Somebody had shared one of his Instagram posts. And so then I kind of went down the rabbit hole of going to his page. And then I didn't realize that when I saw the quote initially, I didn't realize that
atomic habits was his book. I just thought, you know, it was random person on Instagram. Right. So I added it to my Amazon card as a reminder, I've been listening to a lot of audio books lately. So I just kind of add it to my Amazon card of like my growing to read list. Um, so that's on there. And so I look forward to listening to it or, or,
reading a hard copy of it soon. And I love the idea that you have a daily devotional and keeping it short too. One of the practices that I've done recently is start a gratitude journal. And I've been a journaler on and off my whole life, but sometimes it was overwhelming. If I had a lot to share that day, then it would turn instead of just a little five minute recap at the end of the day, sometimes it would turn into 20 minutes and then it kind of became overwhelming. And so now I just focus on
I write three things that I'm grateful for, which sometimes turn into just positive experiences of the day, which I guess is also a thing that I'm grateful for. But by...
keeping it at a minimum of just focusing on three things, it helps to make it so it's only a five minute activity at the end of the day. And then I don't have to put pressure on myself of like trying to recap every activity that I had, but just like focus on three things. Or if I had a bad day, like focusing on something positive or trying to just recall that. And some days it's easier than others.
But by keeping it short, I think that's a great reminder that it doesn't have to be long, but by keeping it short, that helps you to stay in the routine too. Oh, absolutely. And one of the things I also learned is less is more. And really, I mean, that's a mantra I use a lot. Less is more because the whole idea of rest and not trying to do 15 things in a day, and it really makes a difference and you'll be happier and you'll be much more peaceful too. Any final thoughts to share, Susan? I've really enjoyed our conversation as always.
You know, I think we've covered a lot today and I'm just happy to be your friend and your mentor and, and I'm happy to share my wisdom with you and that's something that every decade of your life you get wiser, and sometimes you don't see it.
So just keep opening your brain, your head, your emotions reflect, but enjoy getting older. That's the other thing. Enjoy it. Like I'm fighting it physically, but mentally I'm, I'm appreciating and getting wiser. Thank you. I have found that my twenties was such a tumulus time for me that even just being in my thirties, I feel like I can enjoy this decade more. And then just by hearing your
from others' experiences, a lot of talking with you and others who are, you know, a little deeper into their career or just in life, they all remind me, like, it just keeps getting better. So just, I love that, you know, it kind of gives you something to look forward to and to not get so stuck on while I'm in my 30s and I should have accomplished this by now, like that
There's no reason why you have to feel that way. So yeah. Yeah. And put the phone down. I know it's hard because I'm bad. I mean, yesterday I had five hours of screen time because I was doing a bunch of things with one of my side gigs and it's not good. Just put it down. I mean, it's hard, but.
But put it away, put it down, go do something fun. Get outside. Absolutely. Yes, I love that. Like, I remember a quote that I try to remind myself of because I'm addicted to my phone too, is do more things that make you forget to look at your phone. Yeah. Well, and the other thing is use a do not disturb function because like I will take my phone with me when I walk because I'm not going to not have it, but put it on do not disturb and it's okay. And, you know, there's lots of settings that let you do it for an hour. And so then you don't miss things. But use do not disturb if you have to have your phone with you.
That's great advice. And do that during your workout so you're not interrupted. Do it when you're on a walk. Especially when you're meditating. I've learned that the hard way. It can wait. It can't wait forever, but it can wait a little while. Absolutely. Well, thank you, Susan. I know you have some treats to get to, so I will let you go. Thank you so much for your time. All right. You take care of my friend. All right. You too.
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