Flying Popes & Diet Cokes
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I hope we don't get sued for using that. Ladies and gentlemen, it's the Jan Arden Podcast and Show. Welcome. Welcome wherever you are. Sit back, relax, get a cup of tea. If it's too early for champagne, then just have a glass of water. Rose Cousins is with me today as a special guest. And as always, Adam Karsh, Caitlin Green. Caitlin is joining us from where? Caitlin, where are you? I'm at home in my condominium.

Well, you have a new background today. There's a lovely brick background.

That just was deceiving for me for a moment. I couldn't place you. I'm not at an alley. I am at home. But normally, so normally when we record the show, I'm in my bedroom hiding away because my husband's working from home. And today he went into the office like pre-COVID times. So I was like, I have the dining room all to myself. I am rocking it out here. I know we've suddenly become so acutely aware of personal space.

So Rose, today we want to talk to you, I'm picking your brain, about fitness. You and I talk constantly about trying to stay in shape through this last 18 months. Or our entire freaking lives. Yeah, I know. I feel like we've had this conversation for so many years. But it's always like, I worked out this morning, or I didn't work out, I haven't worked out for four days. What does working out mean to you? And...

Why are we so hard on ourselves if we skip four days of not running on a treadmill or pedaling a bike or something? It was decided long before we ever decided that it was important. Something was decided a long time ago that it is important to be fit. And and so then we bought into that.

And that's why we beat ourselves up when we don't work out for four days. It's not because we want our cardiovascular health to be exceptional. It's not the driving force. It's some kind of something that was decided societally hundreds of years ago, or at least in the 1900s, maybe the 1900s and 70s when cardiovascular exercise was important and the wearing of very stout

form fitting situations people would take the exercise they go down to the beach don an outfit i'll tell you what i'm a fan of bathing suits from 1850 put me in one it's like a wetsuit there's there's a skirt attached they have the tankini going way back around yes and they had huts to change in you'd bring a freaking hut to the beach these are my people i was born 150 years too late

Yeah. My friend Nigel sent me a picture this morning that really made me laugh. He said, "Had you not become a singer, you could have been this." And it was a woman from 1840 wandering down the streets of London with a pea shooter, shooting hardened old peas at windows, and she was basically a wake-up service. Yes. Yes. Yes, that's useful.

And he says, this is a good job for you going forward. If it all doesn't turn out, I'm like, thank you very much. Well, anyway, yeah, wait, I think, I think what it comes down to is constantly, constantly, constantly thinking about if I gain a pound, if I gain two pounds. So for me in my head,

It's not so much that I really am. I sleep better when I do the bike or the elliptical or walk. I just, I feel better mentally when I do something mindless or that, that stops me from getting on that wheel and thinking repeatedly about, Oh my God, are we going to wear masks forever? What's going to happen? Yeah. Am I going to, does my throat sore? Yeah, totally. I think I definitely have a, like a,

definitely a carried over unhealthy version of what I understand the right amount of effort going into exercise should be like it should definitely be like I should be dying it should be an hour and I should be dying afterwards and that is then exercise but but you know that's an old thought and I have a dog now and so I've been walking the dog and I know that that's important and actually also maybe contributing even more on multi levels of meditative you always walk on your dog yeah

It's, it is a contribution, like you're saying, it's a contribution to one's nervous system, whether it's like, it's like giving meditative energy or like getting stressful energy out.

You know, it's the role that it plays, I think now is more like my body hates it if I don't move, like I'm more crickety if I don't don't move. So that's maybe that's the case for you, too. You're a good stretcher. I do like to stretch due to I have this thing where it's like I like to give gifts to my future self. And so like my waking up self will be the old person for the night time. Yeah, like the nighttime self is like is going to do a couple of pigeon stretches and then the morning self is stretching.

Still sore, but maybe a little bit less sore than she might have been. You've been trying to get me to stretch for years. You're like, Jan, do something. Because I mean, I'm a little better about it than I used to be, but I still don't do much stretching. And let's face it, I'm 37 years old. You're getting up there. I don't mind saying that I am 59. And I'm 59 and a half. Remember how the kids used to say that? How old are you? I'm seven and a half.

I'm seven and a half. What? So Caitlin, are you a worker outer all the time? And do you have that thing in your mind? If I don't do this, like, have you, do you go to the gym? Do you do all that stuff? So I do go to the gym right now, only twice a week though, and it's to see a personal trainer. And so in the last few months, I've been doing all that stuff.

I, you know, I did, I gained a bunch of weight when I was pregnant and I was excited to lose some of that. And so I was like, I need a trainer. I need an appointment and a person there to like make me go. Otherwise I'll just blow it off or I won't do the full hour. So I do go twice a week, which trainers quick to point out is not really enough to see like real changes, but I do notice my strength is different. And that's something that I at least really appreciate because I feel like I

I have the upper body strength of a house cat. So that changing my fitted sheet on my mattress was winding me. And I just thought, this isn't good. Okay. Point of information though, Caitlin, because you said, I only go twice a week and like only that's from the 1900s because that's amazing. And the fact that your trainer's like-

that's not going to make a difference. And then you just said you're stronger. So just like, you're right. You know what I mean? Like it twice a week is incredible. It's better than zero. These are all cognitive distortions. Twice a week is incredible. Okay. Good job. Yeah. Thank you, Rose. I think so too, but, but, but the light Rose, you're so right. This, this dogma, this idea that you got to do something every day. Rose and I have something called the, the aura ring.

And it's just, it's, it's like a glorified Fitbit, but it does track your sleep and it tracks your fitness. Well, my ring told me the day before yesterday, like, he'll come up and say, time to stretch your legs. Are you going to start getting ready for bed? Like it pops up on your phone because it's attached to the app.

Anyway, two days ago, it said, you need to rest. You have not had a day of rest this week. So it's tracking my fitness. Like every day I work out and sometimes I'll go 15, 16, 17 days in a row. And just because I am home a lot, I'm like, I should move around. But my ring was actually telling me to rest. So, yeah.

And I did need to rest. I was tired. Yeah. I mean, cause it's also, it's taking everything into account that that ring is taking into account your sleep, your heart rate variability through the night and your activity. And it's like, ah, you seem a little bit like you haven't recovered yet. So maybe you can take a break. Yeah. I highly recommend this ring. I don't think they're that pricey. I think for $350, the app is free. You do not pay a monthly charge after that. Like a lot of things do.

you don't keep paying every month to have it. It's just part of what they do. - Unless you get obsessed, unless you get unhealthily obsessed with things like that and then it becomes a crutch. Comes with a warning.

On you go. I love the ring. I mean, I do love it. And I'm, I'm very curious to see how I've slept every night. They give you a number and Chris, my road manager and I, when we went on the road, you know, a week ago, we hadn't been out there doing stuff for 18 months and he would get up in the morning and goes, what was your sleep number? I'm like 87. He goes, I had the lowest. I had a 47. I'm like, what are you doing?

what do you have to do to get a 47? I said, I've never been below 75 ever. And he's just like, I can't sleep. And he, one of the reasons he got it was, but he says it's because I'm not working out. You know, we've been out here for nine days and I haven't worked out in nine days. I'm just this obsession with it. And it's not anything to do with weight loss with me. It's not, I don't think about that, but if I think that's where we're all headed, if we're exercising, um,

We're thinking we're doing it because we want to lose weight. That's what's in our, I have to work really hard at not having that in my head. Well, Rose, your point about it being addictive. I have seen, because I have friends who have the Apple watch and you can form this fitness group where everyone can see how much each other's progress was that. Oh God. I never want that.

No, it's crazy. And one of my friends, he's like this very type A overachiever, incredibly competitive. And he had it. And we were at a cottage with him. And I was like, this is not good for you and your personality type because he had worked out in the morning. They have a gym at home. So he worked out in the morning with his wife. Then he gets to the cottage and he's seeing what everybody else is doing. So he does like a full like hour long run. Oh.

And then when we get down to the beach, because it was a beach cottage, he's like, let's throw the frisbee around. It's like a border collie, just going, going, going all the time. And then again, the next morning you wake up, we're a cottage, so it's like you're a little hungover.

And sure enough, he's down on the beach crushing his workout. And I just think this is like, I am the opposite of that personality type. So what do you, what do you think his motivation is? Caitlin? Is it body? Is it body form? You have one minute to answer this question.

I think for him, it sounds like competition. Yeah, definitely competition for sure. I've known him since we were like children. And so he is just a, he's just an overachiever and he runs on a high level. So he actually has energy to burn off much like a border collie or a toddler. But I do think that there's a competitive part of it where you start seeing how everyone else is doing. And it makes you feel bad about yourself because you see, Oh, this person already did a run and I haven't done it yet. Or this person managed to crush out this much weight training, or they burned this many calories. And

it just keeps you in this competitive mind state. I know an author, David Sedaris, like the comedy writer. He did a really great bit on how he became addicted to his steps, his step counting every single day. And he found himself walking through airports trying to get 10,000 or more. Listen, you're listening to the Jan Arden podcast. I'm here with Rose Cousins, Caitlin and Adam. We'll be right back. I'm dancing, I'm dancing, somebody with something.

Welcome back. Jan Arden podcast show, Adam, Caitlin, Rose cousins, our special guests. We were, we always have conversations during the break as we just did. And we were talking about steps and the obsession with getting 10,000 steps. My friend's mother will go out at 11 o'clock at night and

looking, you know, glancing at her thing going, oh, I need, I have 2,700 steps still to get and she'll be going around the block. So Rose, you were talking about the step thing. Yeah. Well, I studied kinesiology and our, one of my professors, so pedometers were, have been around for a really long time. They didn't, they weren't in our watches or in like wristlets or whatever. They were like a pager that you would clip to your belt.

And he walked around. I mean, this was back in the 1900s. It doesn't matter when. And he would walk around and he was, you know, touting the 10,000 steps. And I mean, it's just...

We just have an obsessive culture that that is like, you know if you're susceptible to Competition and stuff in some cases like for kids like my nieces and nephew got got fitbits and we're like, you know It is a good thing and of encouragement. You just kind of have to check yourself on where your addictive tendencies are and and what is your motivation and I think the motivation of things is the is where everything gets snarled in itself and

um because we're using like everything we've talked about so far is an is a motivation that is comparative in some way and not just like what do i need what does my body need what do what you know what what body type do i have what exercise would benefit it at on a base level and then and then what are my goals like i want to be able to pick up my grandkids or my nieces and nephews i want to be able to um put wood in i want to be able to walk a long distance i want to be able to

You know, like it's, it really, and I think that is something that's coming into the fitness industry right now is called functional fitness, which is just like how to keep your body mobile. And, you know, when I was in high school, it was all about fat, fat was bad. And now fat is good. And like the, the, the trends that happen, it's like, it's a total roller coaster, but

Yeah. And also there's the thing that like, it's easier not to exercise than it is to exercise. It's very easy to exercise. It's a lot easier not to. So it really is like, you know, you just dig deep and figure out what you're doing it for. Kind of like everything, I guess. Oh, God. My friend was doing Weight Watchers last year.

And I was really proud of her. I thought it was so awesome. And it's a, it's a really good program. Weight Watchers does not sponsor us, but feel free to. And she was saying that she went on an extra couple of walks with her dog every, you know, every day so that she could have two glasses of wine. So that was her motivation. It was like, if I get up to this step count, I can eat this and this extra to my food and

And I would get home and just be like, that is so kind of an odd thing to, that was the incentive was to eat more calories. I don't know. It just seemed counterintuitive to what was happening. Yeah. I don't know. I think, I think there's a lot, I mean, I know there's like, I know two people specifically who run so that they can drink beer, you know, like it's like, I feel like whatever, I kind of don't think that that's a bad motivation. I think it's bad if you're walking and then you want to have something

you want to make sure that you it's like it's balanced in there somewhere like she wants to have an extra glass of wine hopefully it's not every day or like you hope that someone in Weight Watchers isn't using all of their points for ice cream you know I mean like it's not the all these different ways to quantify things like I've done Weight Watchers back in the early 2000s and I think it's a smart program but you you have to use the program and also your brain to know that like you can eat more broccoli than ice cream but you can still have both of those things you just have to

be smart about it. And so, yeah, the quantifying thing is tough. Everything can go in extremes. Like you can take a good idea and bend it into the thing you want it to be. It's not going to make wine or ice cream better for you, but they're both delicious and you should be able to have both if you want them. Well, I remember doing a search back in the day when I drank that what was more, what had the fewest amount of calories for alcohol?

I felt really stupid after even searching that, but I think vodka came up. Vodka is low. That's a good one. Like 80 or 90 calories for an ounce with soda water. And then I'm in my mind, because I was an abusive drinker, of what that would be in points of,

And I knew it was problematic and I consider myself somewhat intelligent, but it was so discombobulated in my mind that I couldn't. Yeah. The wrestling match with the role of exercise in one's life is like, I mean, it's on such a spectrum and it's not something that doctors are saying, well, you should just exercise. It's not something that's prescriptive that, that could be and should be, um,

But it's like, you know, one easy way to feel better in general, which feeds the systems both physiologically and mentally is,

is some form of movement. Like the body is meant to move. The body has always been meant to move. If you stop moving, you're going to stop moving. If you stop moving, you stop moving. That's what my grandma cousins used to say. Is that right? Yeah, she did. We would go and visit like her friends in nursing homes and she would always say we would pull up and she's just like, you just got to keep moving. She would swim and she would walk. And I really like admired her for just like the knowledge of, and my dad's the same way. He's constantly moving. It's like you just-

If you want the privilege of moving, then give your body the thing that it was intended to do, which is move. You know, there's liquids around there that need to move around. What do you do on the road? Like up until all this happened, your schedule and my schedule were absolutely outrageous. Yeah. Busy. A lot of planes, a lot of time zones, which really kick your ass. What did you do out there? Like,

Like I can't, I know we had conversations, but I can't remember what. Yeah. The most recent thing that I was doing that I only really implemented into in 2020 was, was walking, walking every day. And then I would go, it goes through waves for me. This is the annoying thing I find about myself is that I go through like waves where I'm like, I'm going to, I'm doing HIIT workouts for a month. I'm doing yoga for a month. I'm doing planking for a month. I'm like, can do it in these bite-sized chunks. And I'm, I get really motivated by that thing. And then I'll just like fall off the wagon and,

But, you know, sometimes I would be falling off the wagon, burns calories, Rose. No, and getting back onto the wagon also burns calories. But like, you know, you and I were we were in the couple few times ago we were in Toronto. We would go down to the hotel gym like if there's a gym. I would definitely look at that when I'm searching for a hotel, you know, go going for a walk. But consistency, I find I struggle the most with consistency.

And I know I always feel better when I have exercise, but like we sit on planes historically, although I haven't in a long time, you know, sitting on planes, sitting, sitting, sitting. Um, yeah. What are these fitness classes you've been doing lately? It's making me laugh. The one that you said. Oh my God. Yeah. So tell me hell's bells class. Hell's bells. Yeah. No, it's, it's like this hardcore group is a, there's five gyms, uh,

in one company and you can do like, they do all the things they do like TRX classes and kettlebell classes. What's TRX? TRX is that thing that hangs those two things that hang from the ceiling and you do like pull up some things on them. They're awful. I freaking hate them. Um, or you can do body weight workout. That's the one I'm going to do today. It's called HIIT.

H I T high intensity interval training. Um, but it's like, it's like quick either within an hour or just under an hour. They do yoga, they do Pilates, they do all the things. So I'm just kind of testing out. Hell's bells is what I did two days ago. And it's, you're literally swinging a kettlebell up and around at like up to your shoulder, up over your head. You're holding it up over your head. You're squatting. Oh God. Oh,

It's really something else. And you said you could hardly walk. So someone tell me, just inform me that when you're in this huge amount of pain and have ripped muscles and that this is, that that's a success that everyone that works out tells me it's good to be sore. And in my mind, I'm going, that can't be right. Well, no, that's what happens though. When you, when you're asking a muscle to, to change in size or to become stronger, it actually has to tear so that it can grow and repair. Yeah.

It's called delayed onset muscle soreness and it's fine. Okay. I'm doing something wrong because I'm usually never sore. Well, you're not doing lots of weights and stuff and that's completely fine. No, I don't do that. I don't do that. I've started doing more arm stuff and more core stuff. Yes. But anyway, I just want to thank you for coming on the show today because I know you're busy and I know you got your dog is Harrington near you. He's actually in daycare today because I really needed to like get a lot of things done.

So I think that's great. He's probably having fun. Do they have a webcam? You can check in on your dog. No, but they give him a report card each day. He's doing good. Love that. Well, I love you. Thanks for, thanks for being here. And I'm going to touch base with you in like a couple of weeks to see what hell's bells is happening and,

all that stuff. What's up next? Anyway, you can follow Rose at Rose Cousins. Her Twitter is wonderful. Her Instagram is beautiful photographs and you have to catch her stories and she's got lots of music on Spotify and iTunes. So go check out Rose Cousins. You won't be disappointed. One of the most beautiful voices, one of the most gifted songwriters that I know and I'm so proud of you and so inspired by you all the time. So there's my Rose Cousins plug and we'll be right back.

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Welcome back to the Jan Arden podcast. Caitlin Green, Adam Karsher with me. I am going to switch out of fitness. We've lost Rose. Rose actually had to go do a workout. She's going to Hell's Bells or something ridiculous for an hour. And she's going to go rip her muscles. But we're going to talk about Adele. And Adele is coming back with a new single. And it's, I think,

"Take it easy, easy on me" is the first single and she did a little snippet on Instagram. So here is the snippet that we got to hear that doesn't even feature Adele's voice. Here it is. So the whole world is flipping out and all we've seen is her eyeball in a rear view mirror. And you know that iconic black eyeliner, she's looking very Adele-ish. I think we've all acclimated to her 90 pound weight loss.

And how are you feeling, Caitlin, about the new Adele stuff? I am so excited for a new Adele. I love her voice. And I just thought that the response to this little instrumental snippet made everybody so emotional and she hasn't even sung a word. And I,

It's just, this is how much everyone adores her. And it sounds like Adele. It's that piano. It's the production is her. It has her written all over it. I think if you heard that snippet, you could say this is an Adele song and the music video again, she's partnered with rumoredly rumoredly reportedly rumored partnered with the director from her hello music video. He's a Kibbequah director named Xavier Dolan. He's incredibly talented and she filmed, um,

hello in the eastern townships of Quebec and rumor has it again that she has filmed this music video for Easy On Me also in the eastern townships of Quebec on a vineyard and people saw her filming there last month on September the 15th and 16th so I just think it's going to be a beautiful music video and a beautiful song in return for her interesting choice Quebec you know they probably have

A quiet time. They're not inundated with paparazzi because I would imagine it would be difficult for paparazzi to get their butts across the border with all that. And Quebec has been a hotspot for COVID too. They've had an enormous, it's been one of the province's most,

hit, you know, the last year and a half. They've been hit hard. It's interesting. It's an interesting choice. Well, so they did the last music video there. I'm actually, so Eastern townships of Quebec is maybe, maybe my number one, most favorite place, almost in the whole country. I go there to rent a house every year, probably. It's so beautiful. And I

It's very, it's so, it's picturesque. I mean, you feel like you're, you have the mountains, but you have these big, beautiful lakes. You've got rivers. You do have some wineries. It's, it's just fantastic. So I bet you she doubles this with a vacation. Cause that's what I would do. I would just say, okay, Xavier, I want to film a music video, but what I really want to do is unplug for a few days and have some wine. And he's like, all right, let's just shoot here. Like it's a twofer. Well, the single comes out the 15th of October. I think we're going to see outrageous numbers.

I think we're just going to see millions and millions and millions of downloads. I'm going to put money on it. It'll break records. What happens on iTunes and Spotify, all the streaming. I think there's going to be records broken that day. The record itself called 30. So Adele started out at 19.

And then she progressively has just called the album whatever age she's at. And she's not changing that formula. And why would you? I think if she came out and had a record called Smell the Glove two years from now, people would be like, what is happening? I think that this album is going to be really potentially centered around a breakup, which a lot of her albums touch on because her marriage ended. Or I don't know if it was a full, was she married to him?

Simon? Anyway, she was, yeah. I think she did marry him. Yeah. So, so her marriage ended of course. And I think there would just be a lot of emotions and a lot to sing about. And the snippet of the video we saw, she puts this cassette in and you see the car drive off and music sheets start to pour out of the back of the car, out of the trunk. And it's kind of like her driving away. It's like her driving away and towards something new. So I think this is going to be a big change in her album.

Well, there's rumors. Once again, rumor has it she may be looking at a residency in Las Vegas. So many, many years ago, I think when we saw, you know, Elvis was considered at the very last dredges of his career because, you know, he was in Vegas and people would turn their nose up at that. They'd go see him, but they'd be like, oh, he must be really bad to be in Vegas. Well, now that old school kind of thinking with Sinatra and Dean Martin and all that,

Celine Dion, she totally started a new thing. And we saw people like Britney Spears. So it wasn't this old school thing. Lady Gaga had a very successful residency there. Cher, I mean, at 75 years old now, she's thinking about going back. So what would you would you go see Adele in Vegas? I sure as hell would.

I would go see Adele so quickly because Vegas shows, they just go completely over the top. Like I remember seeing footage of JLo and I liked JLo enough, but I saw her twice there. Yeah. And it looked incredible. It was incredible.

The shows are great. And I think, you know, I love Celine Dion so much. So again, if I could plan a trip to Vegas when she announces her residency and double up and go see another artist I love, it's definitely worth the trip. And when you also consider that the majority of these artists live in LA and the casinos that give them-

it's a quick hop the casinos give them access to their private planes right so they fly to work oh man i i would just i would rather just rent a really nice house in vegas and be home in 20 minutes

I, yeah, I think it's a lot of them too. I know this was the case. I think this was the, again, this was the word on the street about Adele is that, you know, you're, you got a little kid, they're enrolled in school and you want to be able to keep them in that same school and give them some sense of familiarity. And keep in mind they, yeah, they do four nights a week. So they don't do eight shows a week like Broadway. There's no matinee on Sundays. She would do four nights a week. It would be, they would run probably five,

maybe Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, or Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, that would be it. And I think the rooms, I don't know if they sit empty on the other days. I think they would because of production.

But yeah, you're right about what, when you are in one place at a time, the sky is the limit with lighting, with special effects, with smoke, fire. There's a Cirque du Soleil element that happens in all these Vegas shows. The costume changes. I mean, I would imagine now with Adele, you know, with her new sort of lease on life style,

like you said, with the divorce and a new body to boot that she's going to be dishing out some great looks.

Yeah. She would look so beautiful. You could really go to town on her outfits, on costume changes, on every hair and makeup would be stunning. And she loves all this stuff. I mean, let's look at her manicures alone. So this is a woman for an eye for showmanship a hundred percent. And I saw her live and I did think to myself, cause there's a rumor that she's wanting to do a holiday TV special as well. And so when I saw her live here in Toronto, I thought she is an excellent host.

So not only is she performing and she has this amazing live band supporting her and she does this incredible stage setup, but her interaction with the crowd is also very, very strong. She brought up a couple on stage and they had their baby with them. The baby had little headphones on and she puts the microphone up to the baby and the baby makes a little noise. The crowd goes wild. Like she's so charming. And so a holiday special for her would be fantastic. And she would just, she'd kill it in Vegas. Audiences love her.

And she doesn't like touring. Like historically, she doesn't like touring. And she loses her voice a lot out there. It's happened almost every time she's gone out. She's canceled shows. I remember the Staples Center. My friend had bought tickets, you know, six months in advance. They were 500 bucks a piece. And Adele canceled those shows because she couldn't sing.

So some people just don't, I mean, they, they sing really well, but they can't take that kind of a grueling night after night after night, then you're traveling and then add COVID to that. So I think it's the perfect, perfect opportunity for her to do this record, to be with Angelo, to keep, you know, him in school and do her thing and enjoy herself. And enjoy her new relationship. Is she in a new relationship? Yeah.

Yeah. She's dating someone named Rich Hall. It's up with you. Although we can put you on the short list for her next relationship. She's too old for me. But anyway, just quick before we go to our next break, Kanye West was flying coach last week. What would you think? And he sat by the bathroom.

So I have, I have been on planes by the bathroom. It's not a great place to be. You basically hear people flatulence and every time the door opens, you, you kind of get a glimpse of what they might've eaten. Like, it's just not a fun, but anyway, there he was, he was flying coach, but I'm just trying to think what it would have been like to sit next to Kanye. Apparently he was very nice.

This is a true story. God strike me dead. My friend, Nigel, I'm going to tell this really quickly, Adam. My friend, Nigel was on a plane. He was somewhere in Europe. He flew. He sat next to the Pope. He sat next to the Pope. The Pope had a diet Coke. I'm not kidding. He somehow was there and he was surrounded with people from the cloth that were with him, but he was on a very short flight. Anyway, he sat next to the Pope. The Pope was very lovely to him.

And he had a Diet Coke. Okay, well, this is the Jan Arden Podcast. We'll be right back. I know people are going to write me and say, that's not true. And it is true. And I think Nigel even has a picture. So we'll report back. Okay, we'll be back. Welcome back to the Jan Arden Podcast. Caitlin and Adam are here with me. And we are going to be talking about something that, you know, we can laugh all we want, but a young woman named Sam.

bought some jean shorts, very short ones, because as you know, young women are wearing shorts that are shorter than their labia. That's kind of the look. Not the most fetching look, but it's short jean shorts, okay? She ended up getting really, really quite sick. She had a wedgie all day. I'm going to let Sam tell you a 25-second clip in her own words. Listen to Sam. She's going to tell you a little bit about what happened. Okay.

If any of you remember, in 2017 there was a really popular short by 1 Teaspoon. So expensive, but I saved up and I bought them half off on Poshmark. I thought they were the coolest shorts ever and of course like my whole ass is out.

So what happened is I was wearing boy short underwear and the material kept clumping up and I kept picking my wedgies. And at some point I was like having fun. I didn't really care. So we went to brunch, then we watched New Girl for so long. And then we went to dinner and we went to a comedy show that night.

So yes, it was a full day. So that was Sam explaining that she didn't care that she had a wedgie for eight hours after doing a whole bunch of activities that day. But what happened is not good. Obviously it was a little bit sore. Her butt was sore from, she was very relieved to get the shorts off at the end of the day, but this soreness did not go away. She, she ended up being admitted into ICU. She was in there for four days. She developed sepsis and cellulitis and

Cellulitis is a skin infection and sepsis is a fricking life-threatening response that the body has to an infection. And you can die from it. Anyway, from wedgies of shorts. I don't mean to laugh. I know, but we've all had it, haven't we? Well, this-

Well, I've had a wedgie. Oh, sorry. I was like sepsis. No, I have not. We've all had wedgies. I've had wedgies from just jeans that didn't fit properly. Yeah.

Yeah. But I also am thinking, did she have underpants on? Well, she said she had boy shorts. Okay. Boy shorts. So it's like the little boy short underwear. And I think those are a little bit prone to a case of the hungry bum. You know what I mean? Like that's what it looks like. So I feel like that's what happened. And obviously she's recovered and it's fine. I mean, you just heard her sharing her story on TikTok and she thinks it's hilarious. But to think that you have to put out a PSA of,

about high cut jean shorts, giving you a life threatening wedgie. I mean, what is happening to the world? I would have thought that she would have been really scared. I have had cellulitis. People are thinking about the lumpy fat on your legs. And that's not what it is. That's cellulite, cellulite, but cellulitis. So cellulitis, cellulitis. Yeah.

You know, I had cellulitis on my leg. Oh no, that's cellulite. Anyway, they're very close, close words. I got it from a wasp sting and I had to get antibiotics. My arm, I watched it over a 90 minute period.

Just spread. And you know how you do that thing where you take a ballpoint pen and you draw around the red mark to see if it's going. Well, my arm, my forearm was three times the size that it should have been. And I had it very close. I was in Nashville and I finally got myself into the ICU and

I remember paying cash for the treatment because I didn't want it going on my insurance. I didn't want my, I didn't want to go through all that rigmarole. So I put it on my visa card and it was like $800. Oh my gosh. To get just a, they gave me a shot and then I was on oral antibiotics for 10 days and it slowly, slowly started going down. But the doctor's like, if this doesn't,

This should be starting to go down like in 36 hours. And if it doesn't, you need to come back here. I was just like, Oh my God, a bee sting. A wasp. Yeah. This is crazy because you think like now it's, you wouldn't think that, you know, a wasp sting or jean shorts were particularly high risk, right? It's just, this is a, when skin infections happen, it can just catch you off guard. Well, she just said she was having a good time. And I guess, um,

just you can override all those things I mean it is funny and she did go on TikTok and and of course it was a great way for her to get followers and get likes and and but she was very close to dying like her her organs and everything else so anyway this is just a cautionary tale

to all you people out there going on your first date um just make sure if your butt crack starts bugging you that you just need to excuse yourself and and go buy some go buy some pants yeah you need to if you're gonna wear those high-waisted shorts you have to have protective underwear so what what would protective underwear be

I don't know. It's like hard underwear, like a full bottom jockstrap. Is that what I'm talking about? Like a helmet? I think they should just put a nighttime maxi pad.

Oh my gosh. Something that's like a shield over your entire bottom end. And then you could put the shorts on. I think I've given a very good piece of advice just now. A nighttime maxi pad. I bet it looks hot. Well, it might show a little bit in the back, but,

But who cares? Are you guys summertime people or wintertime people? Or are either of you looking forward to the snow? Summertime, all the way for me. The hotter, the better. I like hot, sticky, humid, heat alert grade temperature. I like hot weather. Oh, so climate change is right up your alley. Yeah. No, I seriously, when there's like, oh, there's going to be a heat alert and it's going to feel like 47 degrees in Toronto today. Great. I love it.

No way. That's too hot. No, I like it. The hotter, the better. Humidity doesn't bother me. This is my favorite time of year right now. Yeah, same with me. Same with me. Sweaters, and I love the snow. I've had fires in the house the last few days. It's been amazing. Okay, but do you like snow after Christmas? Yeah, I do. See? I don't. I like the snow after.

And I'm one of those people, I'm just always grateful to see any kind of moisture around here. And it's my mother's voice as I'm getting older. It just rings in my, well, the farmers will be glad that there's so much snow. Well, that'll sure be good for the hay crop. And I know that I am hearing words from my grandmother. And then I'm hearing words from my great grandmother because I know that

A language like that is passed down. I know my mom heard her mother say it. And I know my grandmother heard her mother say it. Well, this will be good for the farm. I just, this is something that makes my heart glow because I know that simple phrase comes from

a long, a long Lily lineage. I definitely, I love fall. I love the fall colors. I like something where, you know, it's like a warmer jacket weather during the day, but it's cool sleeping weather at night and you can get away with having a fire. You can get away with having a cozy drink. My clothing isn't sticking to me. My butt isn't sticking to a chair like in the summer in Toronto, it's just too dang hot. Yes. But the second that Santa's gone, I don't want snow. I have no use for it.

he leaves and I'd like him to take the snow with him personally, because it's just, it gets bleak guys. It is bleak in Canada in late January. Snow is different for you guys. It's different for you guys. Yeah. It's Brown here. Well, it's very, like you said, the humidity and the moisture and here it's very dry. We have, I don't know what's worse. It's kind of styrofoam me.

So when you're walking on it can be really squeaky. You're like going down the road. And it can be very oppressive. I mean, with windchill, you can be looking at almost 50 below here at times. And really guys, you can't go out. No, it's dangerous. When I even go out to feed the birds and trust me, they wait for me. And there's birds that stay here all year. It doesn't matter what happens.

And it is job one for me to feed them. I know I'll have people listening that would disagree with that, but I do. And yeah, they do rely on me, but I'm, I'm home all winter normally. And they're so puffed up. They look like little tennis balls. It's so cute. I don't know how they do it. I don't know how they fill their little feather cavities up with air and they can insulate themselves. It's unbelievable. Yeah.

I know. And I just, do you ever look at their little feet and think, what are those made of? I don't understand it. And I don't know how they land on things. I always worry about their little feet. Like I'll see them land on my, my, I have a,

a chain link fence on part of my property. And I'm like, Oh, don't land on there. You're going to get it for, it's like licking a pole. You're going to get your little feet stuck on there. And I picture myself running out with my teapot and pouring warm water on their little tiny feet and gate. Like this is my, I dream about stuff like this. I'm like, Oh God, I hope that ever happens. Anyway, this has been our podcast today. We've talked about a lot of things, but you know what? We're trying to keep it interesting.

please subscribe to our podcast. It'll make sure that we pop up in your feed and you won't even have to worry about missing a show. Spotify, iTunes, we're very part, we're part of the iHeartRadio chain and you can hear us on terrestrial radio too. Check, you can check to see what stations you're on. And we have a Twitter, the Jan Arden pod. So you can write us there anytime if you have suggestions, if you have things that,

you want us to talk about Caitlin green has been back with us. What a pleasure and a joy that has been Adam Karsh as always. Thank you for staying for the whole show, Caitlin, because you zoomed out last week and Adam and I were left to our own devices. So anyway, we hope you had a great day guys. Look after yourselves and we'll see you soon. Totally do.

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