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cover of episode The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About

The “Let Them Theory”: A Life Changing Mindset Hack That 15 Million People Can’t Stop Talking About

2023/5/29
logo of podcast The Mel Robbins Podcast

The Mel Robbins Podcast
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Mel Robbins
一位专注于领导力和个人成长的著名_motivational speaker_和播客主持人。
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一位听众（Super A）
Topics
Mel Robbins："Let Them Theory"是一种简单有效的思维方式转变，能让人们在控制欲上升时及时制止自己，从而获得平静与自由感。它适用于多种场景，例如感到被排斥、对他人感到沮丧或试图改变他人时。 Mel Robbins还解释了人们控制欲产生的三个原因：1. 控制欲是一种焦虑的表现；2. 人们试图通过控制他人来获得掌控感；3. 控制欲常常掩盖着更深层次的情感问题。 Mel Robbins提出了“Let Them Theory”的三个例外情况：1. 危险行为；2. 歧视行为；3. 需要为自己争取权益的情况。 Mel Robbins还详细阐述了“Let Them Theory”的三种具体用法：1. 从负面情绪中抽离；2. 允许他人犯错，从而促进成长；3. 接受他人本来的样子，不要试图改变他们。 Mel Robbins强调，嫉妒是一种控制欲的表现，要学会接受伴侣与他人相处，才能获得更多爱。她还建议人们允许他人表达情绪，不要试图控制他们的想法和感受。最后，Mel Robbins指出，不必为所有人的感受负责，要专注于自身。 Mel Robbins的女儿：接受他人想做的事情，能让自己更平静，拥有更多掌控感。 一位听众（Super A）：即使很难，也要坚持做自己，不依赖他人的行为。

Deep Dive

Chapters
Introduction to the 'Let Them Theory' and its application in everyday life, using examples like prom night and dealing with rain.
  • The 'Let Them Theory' involves letting others make their own decisions without interference.
  • It creates emotional peace and better relationships by reducing controlling behaviors.
  • Mel Robbins shares personal experiences to illustrate the theory's effectiveness.

Shownotes Transcript

I shared the "Let Them Theory" on social media, and it went CRAZY VIRAL. 15 million views, 11,000 comments. Today, it’s your turn to learn this mindset trick.

I’ve been using this technique for a while, so I know firsthand how powerful it is.

The "Let Them Theory" is so simple, you’re going to get it immediately.

And I have some great stories and examples to share with you, because there are three very different ways you can use it.

I can bottom line this in one sentence: 

When you "Let Them" do whatever it is that they want to do, it creates more control and emotional peace for you and a better relationship with the people in your life.

Xo Mel 

In this episode, you’ll learn:

  • 2:30: My overfunctioning anxiety kicked in, until this happened.
  • 6:30: Dr. Amy Johnson gives the best metaphor that explains our need to control.
  • 9:20: Why do we get so upset about what we can’t do a damn thing about?
  • 10:30: These three reasons explain why we try to control.
  • 11:20: Two reasons why your parents and partners are so controlling.
  • 17:00: There are times like these when the “Let Them” rule does NOT apply.
  • 19:00: How are you supposed to let go when you’re a parent?
  • 24:30: Can you relate to this listener who’s worn down from her expectations?
  • 28:00: Stop making up stories about why people do what they do, and just ask.
  • 32:10: When you’re constantly rescuing people, here’s what you teach them.
  • 35:00: Are you actually in a relationship with a real person, or a vision?
  • 37:15: One way we try to control someone is through jealousy.
  • 40:00: Growing apart from a good friend? Here’s how to handle it.
  • 43:30: It’s not your responsibility to make sure everyone else is never hurt.

 

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