Deep Dive
Shownotes Transcript
For me, I was locked up and I was like I was on the sidelines of my own life. I asked myself that if I could start again, what would I do? And weirdly, there was only one answer and that was to get out and do stand-up comedy.
Hey there, I'm Matt D'Avella and welcome to my short form podcast, Three Rules. Each episode, I ask a guest to share three rules that help them find success and happiness. Today, I'm joined by Andrew Hamilton, a stand-up comedian who earned a nomination for Best Newcomer at the 2023 Melbourne International Comedy Festival.
Before comedy, Andrew spent 15 years as a drug dealer, a path that ultimately landed him in prison. Now, on The Straight and Narrow, he's turned his past into some hilarious material, both on stage as a part of his popular YouTube channel OG Crew, and in his book, The Profound Benefits of a Stint in Prison.
I don't know if it feels weird to be on a self-development podcast when you parry it so often in your content. But I'm really excited to kind of dive into some of these rules that you've found that have helped you. Well, after the kind of the amazing guests I've seen you've already had on the podcast, like Struthless and James Smith, I was like, wow.
I'm just like an ex-con, ex-junkie whose brain is fried from cocaine and I can barely string a sentence together. So I don't know if my...
Insights are going to be considered anywhere near those ones, but rule one don't go to jail Well, well, maybe I mean it worked for me. So Yeah, yeah, just I guess be careful what kind of crimes you're committing. Absolutely. Yeah Yeah, I mean I was only in prison for four months and I think that's probably about like a good amount I think any longer than that you're probably gonna have a bad time, but just a little quick stint Yeah, reminds me of like the old scared straight program
Have you ever watched that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was just like, for me, it was like rehab. But I think...
For me, my first rule would be that nobody's coming to save you. That's what I kind of realized when I was locked up is just how alone I was. In the first two weeks in there, I was in quarantine because of COVID. And so you're just stuck in a cell for 23 and a half hours a day. I had no TV or books. And so it was very hard on your mental health.
just to stay positive when it's kind of like you've just fucked your entire life up. And so, yeah, that's when you realize, hey, the only one that's going to get me out of this is me. And that's, I think, equal parts terrifying but also uplifting because you're like, well, you start to realize –
all these things that you have still. I still had my health. I still had my sense of humor. And I still had my mind. So I started writing just to keep my mind active. I started writing like a journal every day. I got a pen and paper. And then I just for my own sense of humor, I started writing prison food reviews every day. And so...
scoring them out of 10 like the frittata needed salt and stuff like that and so yeah i think just realizing that i had the power within me to to fix this and and and that it was going to have to be me um was the first step for me and
a very, very positive journey in the end. But it is terrifying to start. - This rule, this relates to a couple rules that have come up before, which I love. And like, because it kind of comes around to this idea of taking ownership and responsibility for yourself, even when your kind of life is falling apart around you. What does that mean for you? Like in terms of taking ownership once you get out of prison,
you still have nothing. So how do you like take ownership over the things you can control? And how do you start to put the pieces together to where you are today? It was gradual. I think it was just...
It took me a little bit to adjust. Even though I was only locked up for four months, I got used to a rhythm in there. And so then when I got bailed to my parents' place, it was weird to just even be able to go to the bathroom without having to get permission or to leave my room. Or even just going to the grocery store with my dad for the first time, I felt like I had this kind of stain on me. I thought people were going to know that I'd just gotten out of jail. And it was wrong. They couldn't tell.
But I think that it was a slow process of me just realizing... One of the scariest parts was I was on bail. So I thought I was going to go back to prison. Right? So you still got this dark cloud hanging over you. So...
At that point, it's very hard to kind of move on with your life. So I guess I just tried to make the most of it then, which was by staying fit and writing every day. And then I started writing jokes. And...
And that was when I saw an ad for Australia's biggest stand-up comedy competition for amateurs. And I signed up for that and got given a heat. And I thought, well, fuck, if I'm going to do this, I need to go and test out some material. Had you done stand-up up until that point? Never. So you signed up for a competition before you ever did stand-up. Wow. And so I thought, well, shit, if I'm going to do this competition, I need to go to some open mics.
But I was on bail. And so I wasn't allowed out of the house unless I was in the company of my mom and dad. So I had to go to these open mics with my 75-year-old mother. And I would get there and it'd be like 20, 25 guys, mostly in their early 20s, getting on stage to talk about wanking and cum for five minutes. And you put your name in a bucket and you get drawn out randomly about when is your turn. And so you could be there for like two or three hours waiting for your turn to
But because I had a police curfew, I had to be like, hey, it's my first time doing comedy. You don't know me, but can I also go on early? Yes. And I'm like, who the fuck are you? And so then I had to be like, oh, I have a bail curfew. And luckily other comedians thought that was the funniest thing ever. So I found the Sydney comedy community to be very welcoming and supportive of me straight away. And so I did my first ever five minutes on stage in
it went fine. I got laughs and immediately felt the rush of it. And I thought, man, I want to be doing this every night. I fell in love with it straight away. Oh, that's beautiful, man. God, this podcast could be an hour long, but I'm going to do my best to keep it to 15 minutes. Let's move on to rule number two. Rule number two is embrace the crisis because that's what happened to me. It all
fell apart and I used to have a podcast where I would speak to people about Times when they hit a crisis point in their life. It was called shits gone sideways and what I found I found this common thread with people who have all gone through a crisis point whether that's a suicide attempt health issues Brutal divorce losing a job going to prison
that for a lot of people this crisis point actually ends up being one of the best things that's ever happened to them because it forces them to ask themselves questions about themselves and their life that they have perhaps have never asked or haven't asked themselves in a long time. And so that was it for me. It was this huge pause button where for me I was locked up and I was like I was on the sidelines of my own life and was like,
If you could start over again, what would you do? There was only one answer and that was to get out and do stand-up comedy. Like it was just, it was that and nothing. And so I think that for a lot of people, if you were told you have one year to live and you were like, okay, well, what do I want to do with that year? You'd probably have an answer. And so I feel very fortunate that I had this crisis point because it's changed my life and saved my life.
And I think that there are a lot of people who may not necessarily have such a huge crisis point in their life and they get to 80. And it was never great, but it wasn't bad enough that they had a crisis point where they actually got really self-reflective. And they get to 80 and they're like, oh, I didn't love my marriage. My job sucked and I never really did anything special with my life. The
The worst thing that ever happened to me ended up being the best. And so I don't know how to say to someone in a practical way, if they don't have a crisis point, like how do you really ask yourself that? Because...
I think that it's pretty hard if your life is okay, but you're not loving it. It's very hard to then ask yourself that question about what do I actually want to get out of life and then go and actually act on it. It could be this moment right now, listen to this podcast. It could be. Like if you are, because I mean, that's one of those things that,
think I was most afraid of when I was younger is that the men my life would just become monotonous and I would just get a job and then Every day I would wake up do the same thing. I wouldn't be inspired I wouldn't kind of
seek moments of fear where I felt uncomfortable. And I think still to this day, it's like, it's one of those fears that's still in the back of my head where I'm like, you have to keep pushing yourself. You have to keep challenging yourself because if you don't, then you'll remain stagnant and you won't grow. And you'll eventually kind of settle into a life of, of mediocrity. I think what's so beautiful about your story is that you used it as fuel as well too. So it's,
Not only did you kind of face this hardship and then turn it around, but you can also use that as material. Like the hardest points of your life, the most difficult things you've had to get through can be turned into something more productive if you look at it the right way. It was an insane thought. I was sitting in Long Bay Jail and...
And I thought about doing stand-up comedy or I could just go back. I used to work in public relations for over a decade. And I was like, there was only one article in the paper about my arrest. I could go back to a white-collar job and it would be okay. Or I can get on stage every night and say, hey, I went to prison for drugs and we're going to make a heap of jokes about it.
and own the fuck out of it. And I thought that is insane. I bet it's gonna work. - Yeah. - And so- - That's the point of it. There's no turning back. - No. - You're like, there's no hiding from it now. - Burn the bugs, let shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no turning back. And I don't know why, but just, I knew with every fiber of my being that it was gonna work and it has, and it changed my life. Sometimes you need to go through some pretty drastic moves to be like, holy shit, that was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I'm going to be back with the third and final rule in a moment. But first, one of the ways I'm supporting this podcast is through Patreon. By becoming a patron, you get access to the full unedited episodes of the show. What is your take on...
that kind of business guru industry. I mean, that's why we started making them in the first place because I was just so sick of hustle culture video. You know, it's all about guys keeping their circles small and leveling up. And I'm like, none of this means anything. This is insane. As a patron, you'll also get additional unused footage from my YouTube videos and access to a members only area where you can ask me questions for my Patreon exclusive AMA podcast.
And most importantly, you'll feel good knowing that you're supporting a creator you like. And really, what other incentive do you need? Simply go to patreon.com slash mattdavella to support the show. That's patreon.com slash mattdavella. There's a link down in the description below. Thanks for considering. What's your third rule? My third rule is liking the person you see in the mirror. Because for so long...
I was a wealthy drug dealer and I had friends, I'm putting that in inverted commas, around me. And on paper, I thought I had a great life, but I knew I didn't really like the guy that I was. And now I am a poor comedian, ex-con, and I'm a poor comedian.
Publicly outed as an egg kicks con on pretty much every media outlet. And I live with my parents and I am happier now than I've ever been. I love my life and I really like the guy that I see in the mirror now and I like the guy that I'm continuing to become. And so I think there's a lot to be said for...
for forcing yourself to be something for money or success or because of a certain image rather than a person that you really like. Because you don't spend any more time with anyone other than yourself. And it's pretty hard if you don't like yourself. If I think back to the reason why I went down such a rabbit hole with addiction, with gambling and drugs and alcohol, I think a lot of it was because
I didn't like myself and I didn't want to spend time thinking about that. So I would just escape into every single addiction. But now that I live a life of purpose, I don't think about any of that stuff now because I'm like so busy living a life that I love. So this might be a little bit wanky, especially to ask an ex-con who's a comedian now. But like, how do you view self-love? Because it's one of those things that I've always...
like haven't liked, I just don't like that phrase. And, and, you know, maybe that's, I don't know, maybe that's something from my childhood, but I'm like something, something about like self love. It just is like part of like the wanky self-help culture that I don't really like. But even if it's self-like, it's like, how do you go about that process of kind of looking at yourself in the mirror and getting to like, or even love yourself for who you are rather than your faults and what you don't have.
I think I just did it through action. I made myself the promise when I got out that I was going to do stand-up comedy. I wrote a list of all the things I wanted to do in jail, and they were write a book, do stand-up comedy, and do more with boxing. And now I'm doing all those things, and...
So I think becoming the man that I dreamt about, and you only do that through actual action, makes it easy. You don't have to sit in front of the mirror and be like, I like myself. No, of course. That's the very lame version of self-love for me. I agree. I never resonated with the idea that you could love yourself either.
when you aren't in a place that you're not proud of. And I'm sure like my therapist would have a lot to say about that. But like, it's the idea that, you know, I feel like you have to work on yourself to feel proud of yourself.
I have a really hard time believing that I can like sit in a room and just accept myself for the way I am. It sounds a little fucked up, but I'm like, I feel like you need to actually put what you're saying into action. And I think, yep, absolutely. But I think it's not also about the destination. I think it's about enjoying just that journey because even when I was just going to open mics and hadn't achieved anything in comedy yet, I believed, uh,
that was my purpose. And I, and I was loving the process. I would still go on dating apps and be like to girls and be like, Oh, Hey, I just got out of jail and do stand up. And it'd be like a block unmatched, unmatched, unmatched. Maybe I'm just totally like undateable piece of shit. Right. But I'm like, no, like whatever. I still believe that I'm doing the right thing out here, that I'm bettering myself. And now I get so many messages from people,
because of the fact that I own my story. Guys that went to prison and then moved on with their lives and had never spoken about it and have messaged me saying, hey, man, I thought that this was something that I'd never be able to talk about with people, but now I'm doing a public speaking course and I want to be able to share my story. And I think that, you know, I just got a message from someone at Park Lee Prison to say that they've got a book club at the moment talking about my book. And so you never know how much you can touch people by just being your authentic self. Yeah. And yeah.
Even now, like I'll have cops, prison officers, criminal lawyers, and crims all coming to my shows. A lot of bikies. Do you know what a bikie is? Yeah. So I have all these guys coming to my show because they resonate with the story one way or another. And-
for me, that's really cool. There's probably people that I used to work with in the corporate world that are like, what the fuck happened to this guy? Like, he's just like, now he's like on doing jokes about how he like sold magic mushrooms. It's like, fine, whatever. I'm comfortable with myself because I spend my nights making strangers laugh and that gives me purpose and gives me fuel. And, and now, yeah, as I said, I'm, I'm the happiest I've ever been. And,
Even though on paper, my life would probably look like a garbage fire. No, that's beautiful. And I think you might be surprised at the amount of people that in your corporate past who would...
be envious of where you're at now and the kind of freedom that you're creating in your life and the amount of joy that you can bring into it too. It's like, I'd so much rather live with uncertainty than like have a monotonous life. That's fully certain where you, I mean, and even then it's like, you never know if that next paycheck is going to come in and you can get fired at any moment. Um, so yeah, man, like this is, this has been great. I think that's, that's the end of the podcast. Um, is there anything else that you'd like to share before we wrap up? I, uh,
I'm not a deeply religious person, but it did seem strange to me that at my darkest moment in jail, something spoke to me and said, "When you get out of prison, you're going to do stand-up comedy and it's going to change your life." And ever since then, I've been on this path and time after time after time, I've just been getting signs that this is the right path. Just a new door will open.
And so, yeah, I think I'm still grappling with my understanding of spirituality, but I think that there is certainly, there is something greater than ourselves out there. And so, yeah, that's something that I'll probably spend the rest of my life trying to figure out as well, but yeah.
I just, I'm enjoying the journey. Thanks so much for coming on. If people want to learn more about your work, where should we send them? Just look up Andrew Hamilton comedy anywhere or the OG crew on YouTube. Sweet. Thanks, man.
Thanks for tuning in to Three Rules. Want to see every rule from the show? Get the full archive at mattdiavalla.com slash three rules. For my weekly bite-sized self-development emails where I share insightful lessons, practical tips, and personal experiments, sign up at mattdiavalla.com slash newsletter. And if you want to learn more about today's guest, check out the description for this episode. See you next time.